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Part 3 of Dr. Carmilla Appreciation Week
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Published:
2023-07-12
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3,527
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Music To Play Until The End of Time

Summary:

Sound can not travel through space, but she still likes to think that when they played, people throughout the universe could hear them anyway. Even so, she's sure from their countless shows that so many people have heard them already.

But it can be hard, playing so much. She has to make sure her mechanisms are doing well (as well as herself).

or; them <333 literally just them <3 (or; dr. carmilla interacts with the beginning mechs in regards to music and i adore them.)

This is my third installment for Dr. Carmilla Appreciation Week. This is for Wednesday's Song and Story. If you've missed my other stories for this week, they will be linked down below!

Notes:

this one is probably the cutest story i've written and i care for them. this takes place before the airlocking and just a bit after ts joins. it's me combining my big interest in music (specifically classical and instruments) and combing it with the mechs spin lmao.

hoping i characterized them all well. working with how they all deal with more casual conversations is definitely different for me but quite fun to write.

it's very fun to see how the mechs' personalities change throughout different time periods. they are so... i have them rotating in my mind all the time.

also, you can probably tell which instrument family i actually play/know about lmao. sorry if any of the instrument descriptions or ways to play it are wrong. will gladly take constructive criticism

also, this is like my first time writing jonny as nice and it's great. he deserves some fluffy times with his mom (as does everyone else). hehe :3 anyway, i love them and enjoyed writing this fic quite a lot.

there's really no trigger warnings except maybe implications of alcohol, death, one mention of blood, and anxious thoughts (not in depth). i hope you enjoy! (actually) happy reading!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

She's crouched over her bass: crouched because it's the only position she can find where she's comfortable. Her fingers are stretched out over its neck, pressing down specific strings on certain frets to make notes that fit the music just right.

A note twangs and she sighs, starting over again. She gets further this time, but stops as her finger plucks the wrong string. She tries again but now can't get past the first couple notes. She sighs heavily, dropping her head, leaning it against her bass.

She's trying, she really is, so why can't she just play? She tries again and starts making some good progress on the section, but now she's hurting as she continues to play. Her arms feel like they're on fire and her back is now protesting the position she's in.

"Damn it!" She yells out, stopping her playing and shaking out both hands. She stretches her back, cringing at the way it pops vertebrae by vertebrae. It just had to be one of those uncomfortable days where everything felt wrong. It was just so hard to play.

She slumps over her bass again, almost hugging it, hoping its wooden body can provide her some type of comfort. Her hair falls in front of her, getting tangled in the strings. She was just tired, so tired. She's been so worried about the upcoming concert, and playing this right now was so hard. Worst of all, it wasn't helping her fears. But she couldn't give up. Not yet, at least.

She sits back up, trying to sit up straighter. She finds a position that won't strain or hurt her back as badly and begins on a new section.

She's doing pretty good until her finger shoots out a burst of pain up and into her arm when she tries to reach for a string farther away. She cries out and stops. She pulls out her audio cable in frustration. Blaring feedback plays. She doesn't even go to cover her ears, just hangs her head low.

"You know, Doc, you don't need to push yourself so hard." She was so engrossed in her music that she hadn't noticed the smoke that had engulfed the room as Ashes walked in. She looks up at them. They're leaning against a wall towards the entrance, smoking a cigarette.

Carmilla smiles. They're wearing a blue button-up and a vest outlined in a fiery red. They look as laid back as they've ever have. Everything seems normal with Ashes, then. She's about to ask how Ashes is doing with practice, and in general, when they add, "Plus, Doc, you're doing well anyways. You should take a break."

Oh. That was very kind of them. "Ah, thank you, Ashes. I- I think I should, yeah. I can't get much done when I'm frustrated." She nods at them and they nod back, smiling slightly. Carmilla notices the bass next to them and asks, "Are you going to use the room to practice because I can get packed up if-?"

"Nah. It's fine, Doc. The room's big and it could be fun to play with you later. If you're up to it." Oh, that could be fun. She'll see if she feels better later.

She puts her bass in its case and closes it before grabbing her cane and standing up. She walks over to Ashes and gives them a smile. "Thank you, Ashes. I will definitely consider your invitation." They smile back at her before moving away from the entrance to let her pass.

Carmilla can hear them beginning to unpack as she makes her way to get some food. That was very nice of them. She hopes she feels up to playing bass with them later.

She ended up practicing her bass with them and teaching them some harder techniques. Ashes was doing exceptionally well, and they ended up laughing on numerous occasions.

She was now heading towards another part of Aurora with practice rooms to check up on how everyone else was doing. They had a show in just a few days and she wanted to make sure everything was running smoothly.

"Carmilla!" She turns to see Nastya waving her over. She's standing in one of the many common rooms, holding her violin. A stand with sheet music is in front of her. Carmilla heads over, happy she took some sparacetamol earlier. Her legs weren't hurting too badly even with all the walking.

"Hello, Nastya! Do you need any help?" Nastya nods her head before looking from her music back to Carmilla.

"I was wondering if you could listen to me play a bit of this piece and give me some feedback. It doesn't sound awful, but it does sound a bit off and I'm not quite sure what's wrong." Nastya scrunches up her face, frowning in thought.

"Ah, okay, then! Give it a go!" Nastya gives her a shy smile before picking her viola up to her neck and adjusting her bow grip. She plays a small part of a new song they were working on called Cinders' Song. The sound is beautiful and a feeling of pride swells in her heart. Pride for Nastya, for all of her crew who worked on the song, and for herself. But she still needs to help Nastya, so she pays close attention to Nastya's playing, specifically her bow, as that was something she seemed to struggle with more often than not.

When she was done, Nastya put down her bow on the stand and brought her viola down to her side. "How was it?" She looks at Carmilla, interested in her advice.

"It sounds lovely, Nastya." A blue tint spreads across Nastya's face, and she perks up just a bit. "I think the problem you were hearing was due to your bow placement. If you bring it down closer to the bridge, it will create a louder, more full sound that I think you're looking for." She smiles brightly at Nastya. She hopes her criticisms help, and Nastya doesn't take it too hard. She had a problem with taking criticism at times– 'just like me' Carmilla thinks to herself– and so Carmilla had to find a way to better state her criticisms so Nastya would take them better.

Dr. Carmilla's worries are disproven, however, as Nastya smiles widely. "Thank you, Mom!" She says, before moving up to her and wrapping her arms around Carmilla for a small hug. She pulls back quickly, and Carmilla stands frozen for a moment. Being hugged was… nice.

Nastya frowns, asking, "Hey, Mom, are you okay?"

Carmilla's eyes go wide, and she snaps back into reality. She smiles widely. "Yes, of course! Just… not used to hugs is all." She laughs awkwardly, rubbing the back of her neck.

Nastya still seems worried, and Carmilla tenses. Was something wrong? "If you don't like hugs that's okay, Mom-"

Carmilla cuts her off, waving her hands rapidly. "Oh no, no! That's not it. It was just a new experience for me. Don't worry about it, моя дочь." Nastya smiles at her and Carmilla smiles back, glad they could clear that up.

Nastya looks at her sheet music and then back to Carmilla. "I'm going to get back to practicing. Have a good day, Mom!"

Carmilla smiles before waving at Nastya. "You too, Nastya!" She turns around, heading towards the practice rooms.

The ship is mostly quiet when she reaches the most commonly used practice room. Aurora was probably taking a break, especially if Nastya had something to do with it.

She laughs a bit, shaking her head, before knocking on the door. She hears a soft "come in" and opens the door slowly.

She sees Ivy, sitting in a chair with a flute in hand. Many brass and a few other woodwind instruments lay haphazardly around her. She really needs to get them another woodwind/brass player to give Ivy a break. She marks down that thought for later.

To the left of Ivy is a form she can't quite make out at first, before she walks in a bit farther. Jonny is laid out on a chair, neck all the way back with his mouth open. His hands are splayed out at his side, hanging limply. She could not discern whether he was asleep or dead. Thankfully, it didn't make much of a difference.

She smiles, trying to hold back a laugh, but she can hear Ivy giggle, and it makes her break. She laughs a bit before turning to Ivy, who's already composed herself.

"So is he…" Carmilla starts.

"I'm not sure. It's actually a 50/50 split on whether he's drunk or dead." Ivy peers at him, seeming to give him a once over. "Maybe a 51% chance he's passed out."

Carmilla frowns at that. It's funny at first, seeing him in such a weird position, not entirely sure what he's been up to. But… he'd been more reckless recently, and it had begun to worry her. He is immortal, but… her Mechanisms could break down, be hurt. Plus, being immortal didn't mean you didn't have to look after your health, especially not your mental health.

Ivy notices and looks at her for a second. She seems to ponder something before saying, "Doctor Carmilla, I can keep an eye on him for now. I'll try and get him to practice when he wakes up. And…" She gives Carmilla a compassionate look, "He'll be okay. I promise." Carmilla sighs a breath of relief. She could always count on Ivy for help and rational thoughts when she began to get worried.

"Thank you, Ivy. So much." She stops, looking around her. "Do you need any help? Are there any passages you'd like to ask me about?"

Ivy thinks for a moment, pondering her many parts in the upcoming show. "No, I don't believe so. Thank you for the offer, though. It is very much appreciated."

"Of course, Ivy! I will be back to check in on Jonny if he needs it. Thank you again." Ivy nods in response, and Carmilla leaves the room.

She's walking to another practice room when she sees The Toy Soldier. It smiles widely and salutes her. "Good Day, Doctor Carmilla!" It's marching along, off to somewhere, and Carmilla smiles to herself. It was always so happy; it was nice to see.

She salutes back. "Good day to you, too, TS." The Toy Soldier's smile grows even wider, and it jumps slightly, hardly containing its joy.

It salutes again and then goes to salute once more, but stops, not entirely sure what it's trying to convey. It decides to just say, "Have A Great Day, Doc!" And then it's off, marching to who knows where. Carmila chuckles lightly to herself.

She makes her way up to the other practice room and knocks lightly. She can hear the soft hitting of drums. The playing stops. She stays quiet as she hears footsteps coming towards the door.

"Jonny, if you're going to shoot me again-" The door creaks open, and she's met face to face with Brian. "Oh. Hi, Doctor Carmilla." Brian smiles, looking somewhat sheepish.

She looks knowingly at brian. "What was that about Jonny?"

Brian laughs nervously, running a hand through the copper wires that make up his hair. "Oh, nothing. He's just decided to play a game where he… uh, shoots me every time he sees me."

"Uh huh."

"It's really just a funny joke." Brian rushes out. He's not good at lying even when on EJM.

She sighs looking past Brian in the doorway to find blood spattered on the walls. "You know you can tell him to fuck off, right?"

Brian laughs, looking anywhere but her. "Eh, I've tried, and it's easier to just deal with it." Carmilla frowns. Brian cringes. "Anyway, I was wondering if you could help me." Brian finally looks at her, and Carmilla notes him changing the conversation. She'd have to bring this up later.

Brian steps away from the door, walking back towards his drums that, at least, look intact. Carmilla follows. "Sure, Brian. What do you need help with?"

Brian looks back at her, smiling. He grabs his drumsticks, showing them to her. "I've had a hard time drumming for a long time because my wrists and fingers really start to hurt after a bit. I was wondering if you had any recommendations to help." He holds his arms out further towards her. She looks closer.

"Huh. Well, if you hold them-" She indicates to Brian that she wants to take them. He lets her. "-more like this, I think that will definitely help get rid of the strain on your hands and lessen your pain." She shows him how she's holding them, and Brian looks in close, deeply paying attention to her demonstration.

She gives them back to him. He holds them the same way she did. Relief washes over his face as he realizes how much more comfortable it is to hold them this way. He smiles brightly up at her. "Thank you so much! This already feels much better."

"Of course, Brian." She nods at him, and he gets back to his drums. She begins to walk away before adding, "And next time Jonny tries to mess with you, just call me, and I'll take care of him."

She knows Brian has heard her, but he ignores what she says anyway, saying, "Have a good day, Doctor Carmilla!" She sighs before waving and exiting the room.

Well, she definitely needs to talk to Jonny now. If she had an inkling of a suspicion that something was wrong, she knows for sure that something was wrong now. She walks with renewed vigor towards where Jonny was, hoping that he's still there.

He had a good habit of making himself disappear, specifically when Carmilla wanted to talk to him. She tried to stifle her worrisome thoughts about what could possibly be going on, but they really didn't want to cease. She simply walks faster, focusing on the clicking of her cane as it taps on Aurora's metal floors, as well as the growing pain in her hip.

Jonny is right where she left him with an octokitten curled up next to him. He's awake but groggy, and she knocks on the door before she comes in.

She walks in and coughs a bit to wake Jonny up a bit more. He jumps slightly, still half-asleep before his eyes shoot open. He looks at Carmilla. Then his vision goes to the side of him. He almost jumps out of his chair. The octokitten meows then yawns, stretching all of its legs out in different directions. Jonny rushes out of his chair, standing away from the octokitten, glaring at it as it curls further into itself before closing its eyes.

"Fucking pests." Carmilla sucks in a laugh as she watches the scene unfold. Jonny's fear and subsequent anger for the octokittens has never failed to amuse her.

"Uh, Jonny." His head snaps to her. She smiles at him.

He looks from her to the octokitten, asking, "Did you put it up to this?" She blurts out a laugh at the absurdity of the question. Jonny just squints his eyes.

Jonny's about to speak again, but Carmilla holds up a hand, still trying to compose herself. Jonny frowns. "No. I think they just got in through the vents and went to the first source of heat, Jonny."

Jonny still looks suspicious, but finally concedes, shrugging his shoulders. "Did you need something, Doc?" He croses his arms, then uncrosses them, looking slightly nervous. She holds back a frown.

She takes a second before answering, looking him over. He seems better than he did earlier. She'd concluded that he'd been drunk due to both the time it took for him to wake up and the lack of any wounds. But, as awake as he was, he still seemed disheveled.

She applies a bit more weight onto her cane, suddenly feeling more tired. "I was just wondering how you were doing with your practice. It seems that it may not have gone so well." She asks it softly, concerned, but not too concerned. She didn't want to scare him off. She also makes sure to not sound accusatory. That would just start some type of argument that she knew neither her nor Jonny had the energy for.

Jonny looks away and Carmilla tries to stay neutral as she notices the shame on his face. She wishes he stopped doing things that he regretted later. He looks back up at her, rubbing at his neck slightly. "Yeah, the uh-" He pauses, taking a deep breath, letting his brain recalibrate. "The practice hasn't been going too well. I just don't really like it, if i'm being honest." And she's thankful for that honesty.

"What's wrong, exactly?" She tilts her head to the left, waiting for a response.

He frowns before replying. "I don't know. I just don't really want to perform. We've been doing it a lot recently and it's gotten to be a chore. It gets boring." Jonny's fiddling with his hands in front of him. Carmilla accidentally lets out a sigh, and Jonny's eyes snap up to meet hers. Carmilla cringes. Jonny tenses. "It's- It's not that I won't do it. It's just that… the want to do it is a bit gone." Jonny moves a foot behind him, tensing his body like he'll make a run for it at any time given the chance. Carmilla just wants to frown but knows that will only make things worse.

"Jonny-" Jonny looks at her then quickly at the door, trying to not let her notice. She notices. Something pulls at her heart. "It's fine. I get it, I do." Jonny visibly relaxes. His shoulders that were hunched, let go slightly, and his arms drop down a bit. He still seems ready to bolt at any moment, though. "I think we all need a break from the shows. This will be our last one for a bit." Jonny stares at her for a moment, thinking about something. And then he lets a small smile come through and Carmilla can feel herself relax. Oh.

"That… That'd be great, Doc." He's relaxing even more now and looks less like he's about to jump out of his own skin.

"Yeah, of course. You-" She thinks about how to word this so that he'll understand. So that he'll follow through and do it, make it a habit. "You can bring up stuff like this to me, Jonny. I'll always hear you and other member's concerns. You're just as important to this band as me or anybody else." Where his eyes had once sunk to the floor, they're now back on her, and there's a renewed vigor in him that she hadn't seen in the past couple days. She smiles at him. "You don't need to practice right now, but it'd be great if you could come to the  group practice session and play a bit. You can use that to gauge if you think you want to do the show or not. If not, you can sit this one out and we can fill in for you. Either option is okay." His eyes light up at the offer.

"Oh! That- yeah, that sounds great, actually! I will definitely be at the practice session." He moves a step closer to Carmilla then stops, something in his brain saying he shouldn't get any closer. Carmilla just pretends to ignore it. He can take the time he needs.

"Alright, then. And next time, please come to me before you start using Brian for target practice to get your stress out.'' Jonny smiles sheepishly, then grins.

"Then he shouldn't be such a good target-"

"Jonny." She adds a bit of seriousness to her voice but not enough to scare Jonny.

He throws up his hands in mock surrender. "Okay, okay. Sheesh, you can't let a guy have any fun."

She shakes her head good-naturedly, running her hand through her stark red hair. "I don't know why I put up with you sometimes, Jonny."

He flashes her a toothy grin. "It's because you love me."

She mocks defeat, sounding sad. She echoes him. "It's because I love you…"

She looks up at him, grin on her face; his grin is just as wide. They burst into laughter.

She would leave, returning to her room for the night. The next few days were nice, allowing her time to rest as well as practice. When their dress rehearsal comes around, everyone is there talking, laughing, singing.

They all pour their soul into their music, and they make sure the story is perfect. It's the tragic tale of a woman who had long since lost her lover in a war at the hands of an evil king. They would reunite before being torn apart by the creeping dark of death. It was beautiful, and the music was amazing.

She knew as she sat on that stage, playing the piano and singing, that their stories and songs would be remembered for millenia to come.

Notes:

*моя дочь means "my daugher" and is said as "moiya doch". (my phonetics aren't great, this is just a rough estimate.)

hope you enjoyed! they all just mean the world to me. first time using the good parent dr. carmilla tag, let's go. she deserves some good times with her kids. also, yes there's deeper meanings to jonny's (and honestly the rest of the crew's) reactions and everything. yes, they have stuff to go through. no, it's not being brought up here! get back. it's just silly, fun times /lh (i do want to expand upon it lmao).

anyway, thank you for reading!!!

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