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august slipped away

Summary:

Edwina Sharma was a cautious thing of a young lady. Most debutantes were, and Diamonds especially. She knew what to say, when to say it and when to smile. She was a good Diamond. But caution got her nowhere. Carefulness did not mean truth or love, but the opposite it seemed.

Notes:

Reading after graduating 🎉 so was inspired for this by a few books!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Edwina Sharma was a cautious thing of a young lady. Most debutantes were, and Diamonds especially. She knew what to say, when, and when to smile. She was a good Diamond. But caution got her nowhere. Carefulness did not mean truth or love, but the opposite, it seemed. 


It begins as the season ends. In the midst of planning for the upcoming season, Edwina eats a minimal breakfast as her mother speaks of her plans for the day. She is to spend time with Lady Violet and meet Francesca Bridgerton, who has returned from Ireland. 

 

Then, a letter that arrives for Edwina and Lady Danbury intrigues them from Lady Danbury's eldest daughter, Melissa. Edwina knew that her children, bar her son, Dominic, did not live in the country. It was preferable for everyone involved, it seemed. 

 

But what surprised Edwina was Melissa invites her to visit her in Florence for a month.

 

I should like to meet this young lady who appeared out of thin air to impress our Queen - though I have little doubt that you, mama, had something to do with it. Given that she is unwed, she will have time to take a sabbatical in Florence.

 

"Well, why should she not go?" Lady Danbury had been saying to Mary, "My children have done much better away from me."

 

Mary raised an eyebrow at her dearest friend, "Edwina is young! She has never travelled by herself. And dearest, do you not wish to spend time with your family?" 

 

It was the last thing she wanted, actually.

 

Kate and Anthony would be returned from their honeymoon when she leaves. She and her sister were like ships in the night, passing one another so carefully.

 

She misses when she does not have to be careful. She trusted her sister, her heart, and the adults around her. Her eyes were still rimmed pink from the rose-tinted glasses that were ripped from her eyes when that bangle fell, and the man she was in love with loved her sister instead. 

 

She ran. That was not careful. That ruined her. But the alternative? To marry a man who lusts after and loves your sister? This was the best of a terrible situation. And Kate was happy, as her letters sent to them indicate. She was excited to return to England, fresh from the Greek islands where she and Anthony had been honeymooning. Edwina would have to go to Aubrey Hall for a month and a bit, spending time with her in-laws who did not like her, and her new brother-in-law. She would have to climb up the steps at which her girlhood was taken and reminisce silently in her mind her memories and wonder if they all knew when they first visited Aubrey Hall.


"I believe I should like to go," Edwina says, and they both look at her. Agatha is impressed and vindicated - no doubt, she pushed this invitation somehow, and Edwina was thankful.


Lady Melissa Danbury was an interesting woman.  Much like her mother, she commanded attention in social spaces, even political spaces. Her husband was a member of the Medici family - the Lord of Florence, in fact. She patronised artists and orphanages because her father would hate it. She is the image of her mother, perhaps when she was younger, with rich brown skin and her black curls are up in an elaborate updo. But unlike her mother, she prefers softer colours. For example, she wears a soft teal blue gown and coat when she comes to Danbury House to inspect Edwina.

 

"Mama, you look ageless. Do you still have that bargain with Lucifer?" Melissa asked her mother after kissing her.

 

"Indeed. Your husband's father was rather gracious in granting me eternal youth." Agatha returns, and they share a smile that confuses Edwina and Mary.

 

Edwina tried not to squirm under her sharp gaze as Melissa instructed her to stand. She makes her way around Edwina, “So, you shall be with me in Florence for a month. What are your talents, Miss Sharma?"

 

"I sketch and paint. I enjoy reading and playing the sitar and pianoforte." Edwina told her, pleasing as ever. She knows what to say, to make herself pleasant and attractive to most.

 

"You speak the classical languages, yes?" Melissa asked abruptly.

 

"I told you, the girl is well educated," Agatha said with the annoyance of a mother forced to repeat herself. Mary smiled at her friend sympathetically and rather amused, "Better so than most Englishwomen. She speaks Italian and French fluently. She reads in Greek and Latin."

 

Melissa nods and hums, "I wish to speak to Miss Edwina alone, if possible, Lady Mary?" 



"Of course, my dear." Mary agreed, helping Agatha with her stick. The older woman glared at her daughter on the way out.

 

"Now, the mamas are gone, we may speak frankly," Melissa says, as she relaxes on the chaise. The shift in atmosphere startles Edwina. She now appeared friendlier.

 

"Oh? Well, I would be honoured to be your guest in Florence." Edwina begins, hoping she is convincing the woman.

 

"Why? Because you wish to see Florence or run from your scandal?" 

 

Had the news made its way across the continent? Edwina stuttered, unsure if she should rather admit it is both. She can run to a new land for a month and is interested in the city of Florence. Melissa then breaks into a smile, leaning forward and picking up a macaroon from the tower.

 

"Do not worry. Many of the English who live abroad are there because of their own scandal of sorts. Your sprint down the aisle is nothing. But I see you need a break from England. You are wasting away. You have lost the shimmer of a Diamond." She states bluntly with confidence, and Edwina cannot help but wonder if it is a fact.



So she is packed away, a small portion of her life in a pink trunk to be put on a boat yet again.


Florence is a wonderful city, so light and beautiful after a week on a boat and in a coach. In the spring, these buildings are bathed in soft sunlight, making them even more stunning. The surrounding countryside was a sight to behold. Edwina stared at the wildflower-covered hills as they passed them in the coach.

They arrive at the Palazzo Riccardi is hundreds of years old and remains one of the most impressive structures in Florence. Edwina looked around in wonder as they entered the courtyard, staircases and hallways in all directions and in the centre, a large bronze statue.

“Is that…?” Edwina pointed to the Bronze statue of David, “Donatello’s? Not Michaelangelo’s, yes?” Her appa had a book of famous artworks, and she and Kate would point out the ones they would like to see.

“Indeed.” Melissa said, “My husband’s namesake and architect - Cosimo the elder - had it commissioned. We loan it to museums occasionally.”

Her rooms are in the west, on the second floor. High walls and ceilings are carved and painted beautifully. Her lady's maid, Sofia, is a young girl with kind, fascinated green eyes as she greets her temporary mistress.

Three children - two boys and one girl are lined up, looking at the visitor with wonder. 

"My children - Francesco, Giovanni and Isabella. This is my cousin, Signora Edwina. You must be on your best behaviour." Melissa ordered, and they all nod, smiling angelically.

"Hello." Edwina greeted them with a small wave.

"You are very pretty, signora." Giovanni said sweetly, making Edwina smile at how charming the young man was trying to be. She had a feeling he was much like his father in that aspect, given Melissa rolled her eyes fondly at her eldest, pulling him away from her.

"Greeting our guest, Giovanni?" A deep voice said. 

“Papa!” They all chorus, sprinting towards the bearded man who embraces them, ruffling Francesco and Giovanni’s hair and lifting Isabella in his arms. He told them to go play before greeting his wife with a kiss that made Edwina turn away.

Edwina curtsied as Melissa introduced the two of them. The patriarch of the family is a tall, imposing man, at least ten years Melissa's senior but no less handsome. His dark shoulder-length hair and beard are groomed. He smiles at Edwina as he places his arm over Melissa's shoulder, and she leans into him.

“Welcome, Signoria Edwina. Any friend of my mother-in-law certainly deserves a break from the she-dragon of England.” He quipped and kissed his wife on the cheek, “Dearest, I speak in jest. Your mother is a fearsome creature to behold, much like her daughter.” 

“And do not forget that,” Melissa says with a twinkle in her eyes. He may be the politician, but she ran Cosimo de' Medici IV and this family. She was the daughter of Agatha Danbury, after all.

They sit for dinner of venison baked in rich red wine sauce, herbed potatoes and green vegetables. Edwina had read and heard that everyone preferred rich foods and wine in the Italian states, yet still kept incredible physiques. Apparently, red wine was good for the blood, as Melissa kept indicating that Edwina's glass remained full even as she sipped at the sweet wine. 

"Tell me, Signorina. Have you ever seen a tiger?" Cosimo asked, interested.

" Once. I was rather young and they used to roam the grounds. My Appa - my father - never wished for us to get too close.” Edwina told him, “The cubs were adorable, but a mother cat would do the unthinkable to protect them." 

“Indeed. My uncle used to keep one he brought in India - in the north. She fought with a lioness." He told her, "I was a boy, and I was fascinated with the creatures. My brother was not allowed to see them for fear he would provoke them."

"Considering how he speaks with the Pope, that is unsurprising." Melissa added, then looked to Edwina, "So, what should you like to do? I would be happy to take you to the markets or galleries?"

“I would like to visit the galleries," Edwina said and they both nodded.

"We have tickets to the opera - Don Giovanni. I believe you will enjoy it." Cosimo tells them, "You should get some new dresses. You are rather English." He said, looking at her light pink dining dress. Edwina looked down, slightly self-conscious.

"It is not as bad as my husband makes it out to be. He looks down on the English." Melissa said, "But yes, a few new gowns will be good for you. I will ask Isabella to come."  

Edwina merely nodded. She was to be pleasant and she was a guest in this house and country.


She is taken to the Uffizi Galleria after a morning of being prodded and measured by a seamstress. Edwina attempts not to feel too self-conscious, as she is nothing here. She rather enjoys being nothing for once. She is merely a guest, not a Diamond or woman of note. She could simply wander and look at paintings she admired. She fanned herself gently with the pale pink fan she had brought with her, staring up at a painting of the Madonna surrounded by saints and angels.

"Edwina, will you be alright for a moment?" Melissa asked, "I must speak to a friend about dinner next week." Edwina nodded, and she watched her glide to a group of ladies who were watching them with interest before curtseying to Melissa.

Edwina walked into another hall, seeing the tone of paintings shift from religious iconography and bright angels and cherubs dancing around Christ and his apostles to the more tragic parts of history. She stopped, studying the dark painting of a woman cutting off a man's head. She knows this story - Judith and Holofernes. It is a rather morbid painting but she finds an affinity for it, and admires it. Has she truly become so morose?

"Such beautiful form and colouring.” She hears a deep voice say behind her. She froze, confused, before turning around.

"Excuse me?" She asked the stranger. But found her angry retort stuck in her throat as she took in the stranger in a white shirt and trousers, his deep blue coat grasped in his hand. She found him to be rather beautiful. Tall, well built but not immediately intimidating. The warmth in his deep blue eyes ensured so as he stared at her momentarily, his lips twitching upwards, amused by this young lady.

He pointed to the painting, "One of Caravaggio's. Not many find his paintings uplifting, but I find his ability to depict such a brutal death so beautifully fascinating. Rather morbid of me, I acknowledge."

The painting. Of course, he had been speaking of the painting, “Oh, my apologies.” Edwina whispered, flustered. She was so cautious and jumpy, paranoid even. 

"Not at all. I was musing aloud and forgot my manners. Do forgive me." He said sincerely with his right hand on his heart. She caught a glimpse of the signet ring on his pinky, and she worried she had offended some nobleman.

"I believe it is the morbid nature in which Judith slays him that rather attracts people to the painting," Edwina said cautiously, and he nodded, smiling. "She is presented as rather sympathetic. Vindicated."

He nodded, "A rarity. Well, he did deserve it. If she were my sister-"

"If she were your sister, she would have already solved the issue," Edwina said pointedly, and he grinned. Edwina turned, walking away from the man. But she was surprised to find him doing a quick jog to catch up with her and walk beside her. 

"Sir, we have not been introduced." Edwina protested gently, "It is improper for us to walk together."

"So, introduce yourself." He said, as if it was simple, "I am Friedrich Ludwig." He held out his hand, and she extended hers for him to take. He gently kissed her knuckles.

"Edwina Sharma." She said, curtseying.

"Where are you from, my lady?" He asked, her accent intriguing him. She was softening it, sounding slightly British but still Indian.

"London." 

"London? Ah, I have not been there in a long time." Friedrich said, "Are you moving here? I am surprised your husband has not come to find you." He looked around, expecting some possessive man to come seeking out his beautiful wife. He would certainly not let a woman as beautiful as she was to wander around alone. 

"I am not married, my lord." Edwina said, "I am a guest to a friend of my mother's. She is busy." She looked around, spotting Melissa still with the gaggle of women in jewel-coloured afternoon gowns.

He nodded, "I, too, am a guest in this city. I always am. It is a beautiful place with a dark and wondrous history. You walk amongst vipers, madame." 

Edwina's face fell, "Is that a threat, sir?" 

Friedrich stepped closer, "A warning for a beautiful woman. You are far too beautiful to be bitten." He whispered and then straightened up as she narrowed her eyes at the man.

"Your Royal Highness?" A man in blue livery comes up behind him, an urgent expression on his face. But Friedrich is still looking at her, a smile on his face as Edwina's face falls.

"Just a moment, Wilhelm." He said, turning. Edwina does not know if she could even say a word; he did not need to ask her not to, "A pleasure to meet you, Miss Sharma. Until we meet again." And with that, he turned, leaving the gallery with the stressed man in blue livery.


That evening, they go to a soiree, a celebration at another grand home.

She's never worn red. But she rather liked the red gown that was decorated with the prettiest gold embellishments on the bodice. She felt different and nervous. Melissa, in purple velvet, smiled approvingly upon seeing her as they sat in the carriage. 

The soiree was much like the English ones but with more jovial music and an informal atmosphere. It was held by the Orsini family to celebrate the matriarch's fiftieth birthday.

Edwina stood with Melissa as she spoke to different people who came to speak to her, happy to observe the entertainment of fire breathers and dancers in colourful clothing. Her eyes roamed across the room, seeing people speak to one another, others partnering up for the dance about to begin. She could see so many of the men were more interested in doing their deals and discussing work than sitting back, but she supposed that was the true purpose of this event. She spotted a few military men, likely all from high-ranking families but she spotted a familiar blonde man, far tidier than he had looked in the gallery.

 That man again. She could not tell which house or country he was from. His accent did sound rather Bavarian. Or Swiss even? He wore deep blue as many of the other gentlemen did that evening but no medals or signs to tell her which nation-state he may have offended.


He, too, was trying to hide. Edwina stared at him, trying to decipher him. She should not want to, but she was intrigued. 

But then the worst thing happened: he saw her.

His blue eyes darted around before settling on hers, and Edwina found herself unable to look away as he excused himself from his conversation. Edwina looked down, taking a glass of wine from a waiter and drinking half of it, despite how strong it was.

Friedrich was making his way to Madonna de' Medici and the intriguing Miss Edwina Sharma. He did not realize she would be here, but seeing her stare at him, he could not believe his luck at seeing her again.

He bowed, "Madonna de' Medici." 

"Your Royal Highness." Melissa said with a curtsey, "It is wonderful to see you here. Are you enjoying the festivities?" 

"Indeed, my lady," Friedrich said, and his eyes darted to Edwina, who wished she could be swallowed whole by the ground.

Melissa noticed and introduced Edwina, unaware of their previous acquaintance, "My guest, Miss Edwina Sharma. This is her first time in Florence. Edwina, this is His Royal Highness, Prince Friedrich Wilhelm Ludwig von Preußen." 

Edwina curtsied lowly, "My Lord." She greeted sweetly.

"Would you do me the honour, Miss Sharma?" Friedrich asked.

Edwina's eyes widened, and she looked to Melissa, whose expression was unreadable, but she took her glass of wine, "Do you wish to dance, Edwina?" She asked.

"Oh, um, yes." Edwina took his offered hand, and he led her to the dance floor. They stood across from one another, lined up with other couples. 

"When you said a guest to a family friend, I did not realise you meant Lord Medici." He said, lifting their arms up as they intertwined in the dance.

"Our mothers are close friends," Edwina explained as she took his hand, and he turned her around.

"In the viper's nest, and yet you seem at home." He observed, "A rose amongst thorns." 

When he spun her around to face him, Edwina's eyes narrowed, "And how do you know I am not a thorn?" 

Friedrich smiled, "I do not. Admittedly, I am basing my opinion on appearances. You have a kindness in your eyes yet a shrewdness in your speech. It is most intriguing, Miss Sharma." 

The dance ended and he bowed, kissing her knuckles, and she tried not to shiver when his lips lingered.

 And that was the problem, Edwina thought to herself when she went to sleep that evening, lifting her right hand to look at the knuckles Friedrich had kissed. You never could know their intentions to love or destroy.


Edwina joined the family for breakfast, hearing the children chattering loudly. Breakfast was had outside in the main garden. Hedges were cut neatly, guards at a gate, and a beautiful stone fountain in the middle. 

“Good morning,” She greeted Melissa, sitting beside her, “Where is Lord Medici?” 

“A meeting,” Melissa said, offering no other details. Edwina was served fruit and toast for her breakfast. The Lady indicated she be given eggs and salmon, “You are rather thin.” She said bluntly, "Eat."

Edwina's eyes widened, but she began eating, spearing a few berries onto her fork before eating a slice of toast topped with salmon.

“You have to eat it all!” Isabella told her in what she imagined to be a whisper, “Mama will know if not.” She smiled at the little girl who was dutifully eating her honeyed porridge and fruit.

Soon the children were taken to their lessons, and Edwina and Melissa were left alone, the former soaking in the sunshine as she began to read the book of short fiction stories she found in the small bookshelf in her room.

At midday, Edwina is still reading when a visitor comes to the palazzo. Sitting on the chaise, facing the garden, she can not see who it is. But she hears a familiar accented voice and freezes.

"Your Royal Highness." Melissa greeted, surprised. Edwina placed the bookmark on her page, turning to see Friedrich. He has a bouquet of yellow roses in hand.

"My Lady, Miss Sharma." He bowed, "I brought these for Miss Sharma and hoped to take her for air, with your permission."

Melissa looked at Edwina, a smirk on her face, "Well, that depends if Miss Sharma would like to take a walk with you, Your Highness. Edwina?"

Edwina saw the earnest look in his eyes, hopeful to spend time with her. How could she not say yes?


They went into the marketplace, an older maid acting as chaperone to them trailing behind.

"So, where are you a prince of, exactly?" Edwina asked, “You did not say yesterday evening.” 

"Prussia." He said cautiously. People could be intimidated, given the size and power of the Prussian empire, as well as the reputation of Germanic ruthlessness. Well, they did kick Napoleon out due to that ruthlessness.

But Edwina was fascinated, having never met anyone - well, aside from Queen Charlotte - from that part of the world.

"I thought I detected a Bavarian accent." She said, rather pleased with herself, and he smiled, "I speak some German but wish to improve it. It is a fascinating language and beautiful too." 

"Not many would say so," Friedrich said.

"I enjoy the complexity in different languages," Edwina said, inspecting a few of the beaded bracelets on a stall. She purchased some ribbons and beads to make some bookmarks with and to add to some embroidery.

"And what is your home language?" Friedrich asked, "I noted your accent."

"Tamil." She told him, "But I speak Hindi too. I was born in Chennai, in Tamil Nadu, and my father was Tamil." 

"Perhaps you may teach me some." He asked.

Edwina smiled bashfully, suddenly warm "Um, okay. Try Hello - vanakkam." 

"Van-a-kkam." He said slowly, and she smiled, "Your v's are much like ours. But I fear if you give me a word with a 'w', I shall offend your entire nation and must send an apology immediately to the King." 

Edwina giggled, genuinely amused at his ability to make fun of himself.

"You are odd for a prince," Edwina commented.

"Is that a bad thing?" 

"Not at all." 


They seemed to spend so much time together. Friedrich would come to the palazzo , and he would escort Edwina to the gallery, or they would wander through the streets.

She found there was an ease in their friendship. She was unknown here; he was visiting on diplomatic duty. There was no pressure. 

"So tell me, why are you not married?" Edwina asked teasingly one day.

"I have been at war!" Friedrich said, laughing, "It is rather hard to look for a bride on the battlefield." 

"Nurses at field hospitals, surely?" 

"Ah, yes." Friedrich agreed, "Why did I not think of proposing to a nurse? And have my uncle and Aunt Charlotte tear the poor girl as she does her Diamonds. Does she still name an Incomparable? I find it cruel." He mused.

"I was the Diamond last season." Edwina admitted, and he looked at her, about to apologise for his mocking words, “Do not apologise. You did not know, and quite frankly, I feel more like painted glass than a gemstone most days.” 

"You did not wed? There must be a story there." Friedrich said, but not without sympathy, "However, I cannot imagine what fool of a man would abandon you." 

"Well, I rather abandoned him." Edwina said, biting her lip nervously, and he looked at her, "I, um, ran, from the altar?" 

Friedrich's eyes widened, "In your wedding dress?”

“Why, yes, that is what I was wearing.” 

“In front of the Queen?”

“She organised the wedding. She had planned fireworks.”

"What did he do?" 

Edwina sighed, "He was in love with my sister." Friedrich raised an eyebrow, “It was an awful situation, and I did not realise it until I was at the altar. He could not look at me and one of my sister’s bangles fell, and he stopped to help her pick it up. I mean,” She huffed, releasing herself from Friedrich’s arm to stand in front of him.

“What sort of man does that? Lusts and loves after one sister whilst lying to  and courting the other?” Edwina asked, “Am I a mere appendage to be removed so easily that he did not think I was deserving of the truth? I was a fool, but I cannot find a good reason why any of it had to occur.” 

Friedrich looked at her thoughtfully, “I do not know. I truly do not know why he did what he did. It is a dishonourable way to act and I am sorry, for what he did to you. So this is why you are in Florence.”

Edwina sighed, looking down at her shoes, “Everyone blames me.” She whispered, her voice cracking, “Not my mother or Kate, not even Lady Danbury or Lord Bridgerton. But everyone else does. I am… ruined. Everyone looks at me with mocking or pity or they laugh and whisper behind my back. An ungrateful brat who ran away from such an upstanding man. Melissa assured me I would be invisible here, and here I am. I do not have to pretend to be as happy as I have been playing to be.”

“People here have done much worse,” Friedrich said lightly, making her huff a laugh, wiping away the tears that had fallen, “People in my family have done much worse. But I am sorry, Edwina. I am sorry that society has been unleashed upon you most unfairly.”

"A sufficient reason to run." He agreed, "I am sorry. 

Edwina did not know what to say, merely giving him a tight smile and taking his arm again, “Your aunt has been most generous, bearing no ill will towards me. She mentioned you.”

“Did she? I have been avoiding her letters of late. I should read them.” Friedrich said, knowing his aunt's letters were usually the same, “Perhaps we shall not tell her that we know one another.” He winked.

She had not mentioned him in her letters. A cruel part of her liked keeping such a secret from her mother and sister. Adults could keep secrets, as they had done. That did not mean she did not feel guilty for shutting them out. 


The following day, Friedrich took her to one of the museums, wishing to make up for him bringing up such a terrible memory. 

Edwina noticed the place was empty, which was most unusual. It was a Thursday, not Sunday. But she was excited to see Michaelangelo's work, unobstructed by others.

"Michaelangelo's David." She breathed out, seeing the large statue. Edwina's eyes sparkled in wonderment.

"It is quite impressive. Awe-inspiring." Edwina gushed and smiled at Friedrich, who was glad to see her reaction, "Thank you. This is most wonderful!" She could not help but hug him, wrapping her arms around his waist. He was surprised but he hugged her back.

Edwina's eyes widened as she pulled away quickly, "My apologies, I forgot myself." She immediately said.

"Not at all," Friedrich assured, smiling. She was a warm person; a hug was most welcome. To be so close to her was incredibly welcome indeed.

"May I ask a rather frank and, well, odd question?" Edwina said, staring up at David.

"I believe odd questions are a hallmark of our friendship, no?" 

"Is that what, well… An accurate representation of the male form?" Edwina asked, looking down at her shoes. 

"Some, but the male form varies." Friedrich said quietly, then leaned in closer to her, so close that he could breathe on the back of her neck and Edwina inhaled softly, "I would be happy to show you." 

Her face went incredibly warm, and it was not the weather as she could not answer, unsure of what to say. How does one reply to that? She looked up at Friedrich and blinked twice.

"Would you?" She challenged and his face fell slightly as he realised she was serious.

Gently taking her arm, quickly led her somewhere else, down an empty space, away from the guards and pressed her gently against the wall.

"Are you to show me the male form, Your Highness?" Edwina asked, even as her heart hammered in her chest. Friedrich exhaled deeply, staring at her.

Then his thumb caresses the corner of her mouth. Edwina inhaled sharply.

Friedrich eyes searched her face, before cupping her cheeks with his hands so gently as if she was made of glass before his lips were on hers.

She had never been kissed before. Especially not like this. All consuming, as if he wished to inhale her. Her hands slowly rose to wrap around his neck, keeping him close. Her grip on the back of his neck became tighter as she moaned against his lips, opening her mouth briefly. His tongue pushed past her lips. He felt her freeze with uncertainty before her tongue flickered timidly against his. 

He wrenched himself away, breathing heavily as was Edwina. He ran a hand over his face as she was still leaning against the wall. Her lips were swollen and she was deliciously mussed but not so messed up.

"I apologise…" Friedrich huffed.

"Not at all." Edwina replied, looking at him.

Men. It never could be simple with men.


Edwina huffed, laying against her bed cushions, frustrated. She could not sleep, she needed relief, and her mind was on Friedrich. 

She had touched herself once or twice before, out of curiosity. But this felt different. New. Hot. She thought about how Friedrich kissed her. How gentle his lips were as his hands roamed over her body. 

Her hand wandered down to between her legs, feeling the heat radiating from her most intimate parts. She moaned softly as she slipped a hand beneath her night dress, bunching it up to gain access.

Her breathing grew heavier as she gently reached down and stroked her wet folds, surprised by how aroused she was. She thought of Friedrich again and shut her eyes. But then she heard something on her balcony.

"Edwina?" 

That was not her imagination. That was real. She grabbed her pink dressing gown, throwing it on as she went outside and looked around. Then she looked down.

Friedrich was hanging on a mental hook and smiled at her.

"What are you doing?" She whispered as she watched him climb up with ease, swinging himself over the balcony, "How did you know this was my room?" Edwina whispered. 

"I needed to see you, after today." He replied, "I wished to apologise..." 

He realised that he seemed to have interrupted something. The flush in Edwina's cheeks, the way she was gripping her dressing gown. Edwina could not look at him.

"It is fine. I am well." Edwina whispered, "Now, you must go!" 

"Do you touch yourself?" Friedrich asked, a smile growing on his face. If she knew how to punch someone, she would punch him.


"I..." She let out a frustrated sigh, "I do not know how to do it properly. I read that it helps one sleep and I-"

"Do you want help?" He asked bluntly. 

It would be improper and terrible and receiving any sort of assistance from him in such a manner would be terrible. She should be careful.

But where had caution got her? Edwina nodded silently and perhaps, she could be done with it all. These feelings would go away.

"Just once and then we may return to being friends, yes?" Edwina asked. 

"Most definitely." Friedrich agreed, "Lie on the bed." He ordered gently.

Edwina did so, removing her dressing gown, sitting up. She was tense, watching as Friedrich sat on the edge of the bed, watching her. 

"I can't." She whispered, 

"Yes, you can." He encouraged, "Do whatever pleases you," He whispered.

She slowly spread her legs wider, her night dress bunching up above her knees. He inhaled, gently rubbing her thigh in reassurance. 

"Friedrich," She murmured, her fingers pressing down against her sex, already slick and wet from the memory of his kisses. He watched as she shut her eyes, removing her hand.

"Can you show me? Please?" She begged.

Friedrich did not hesitate, shuffling closer as his fingers delved between her folds, rubbing up against her hardened nub. Edwina cried out, her cushions muffling her moans. 

"Christ, Edwina." He cursed, muttering roughly in German as he felt how soft, wet and warm she was.

He prodded at her entrance and she whimpered, opening her eyes, "I couldn't..." Edwina warned.

"Yes, you can." He said, sliding a finger inside of her as his thumb rubbed the hardened nub and she ground against his hand.

He slowed the pace of his finger, watching her reactions. Then he would increase the pace, delighting in her gasps as her wavy hair spread across the bed as she writhed in pleasure.

Edwina felt a tightness begin to wind up within her, "I feel..." She warned. 

"I know. Come for me." Friedrich encouraged and his thumb flicked across her the nub as she shattered into a million pieces.

But this time, it felt good. Edwina felt as if she was floating. 

He helped her under the sheets, resisting the urge to kiss her again. She would sleep well that night. The best night's sleep she had in a long time.

When she was at breakfast, she looked so serene and innocent.


Going to the Opera in London was an exciting experience. But looking back on it now, it was tainted by her memories of her courtship. It had been Orpheus and Eudriyce. She looked over to Kate and her mother, who loved it, and then she looked to Lord Bridgerton, who was not looking at her. She had hoped he was overcome with emotion, but after her failed wedding, she wondered how often he looked over to Kate, wanting to reach his great love but her being so close yet far away. Would that make her Hades? 

Edwina was looking forward to remedying that memory, and Don Giovanni, performed in the original Italian, was a heart-wrenching and invigorating experience. She tried not to weep, but could not help it. The soprano, Siena Rosso, is beautiful. Her olive skin and gentle, if not sharp, brown eyes seemed to speak with every single member of the audience. 

In the powder room, Edwina was gushing to an amused Melissa about how beautiful the entire experience was.

"I am glad you enjoyed the performance," Melissa said.

Edwina nodded, "Indeed! And Miss Rosso is very talented." 

"Have you never seen Miss Rosso perform?" Lucrezia, the wife of the Duke of Ferrera, asked her, "She is from London like you, yes?"

"No, I believe she left London before my family and I arrived. That is a shame, for she is magnificent. Truly talented!" Edwina said, fixing her gloves.

"The rumour was that she had an affair with a rake of a Viscount. He failed to adequately take care of her, and so she left. Smart woman." Clarice told her.

"Was he married?" Edwina asked.

"No, no. Her first mistake. Married men take care of their mistresses whereas young unmarried men are careless with women outside of their family." Melissa said, "Remember that, dearest. My husband was most caring to his actress." 

"Cosimo has a mistress?" Edwina whispered, but no one else was surprised. They all continued as if it were common knowledge, and perhaps it was.

"He had one. He gave her up in the first year of our marriage." 

"You are lucky, Madonna ." Isabella said, "Piero still sees that actress from Ferrera. There is even a child, but knowing her, it could be anyone’s!” She laughed as did several other ladies, whilst Edwina raised an eyebrow.

Melissa escorted Edwina out, “Do ignore them for the most part. My mother taught me from a young age not to have a romanticised idea of a marriage." 

"I have learned that lesson most recently," Edwina agreed. She thought of her night sessions with Friedrich - how he would caress her, show her how to pleasure herself, but it was never quite the same without him. Was that the last pleasure she was to have before she wed?

At the small gathering afterwards, Edwina was excited to meet Miss Rosso. The singer, dressed in a deep blue gown, smiled and curtsied to them.

"You were wonderful, Miss Rosso." Edwina complimented her immediately, and she smiled thankfully at the compliment, finding Edwina to be really sweet. She looked nearly out of place, in a blush pink gown amongst a sea of deep jewel tones and cynical married women.

"Miss Sharma is from London, like you," Melissa told her. The singer raises an eyebrow and smiles at her.

"How is that tortuous city?" Siena asked.

"The same, I suppose. I have only been there a short while." Edwina replied.

"And already in Florence?" Siena remarked.

"Miss Sharma here is running from her own scandal. She ran from her groom, Viscount Bridgerton, at the altar!" Isabella Orsini told her, “A rather intriguing thing to do, given she was l'impareggiabile.”

"Viscount Bridgerton?" Siena echoed slowly, her eyes returning to Edwina, "You... you were to wed him?" 

Edwina swallows the wine she is sipping as she nods silently. She watches as a dark look comes across her pretty face that disappears immediately. She supposed she has become proficient in reading micro expressions since that bangle fell, for the realisation hits her like a ton of bricks.

She was his mistress. 

Would he have taken a mistress had they married? Her sister or some poor substitute as his wife was. But now Edwina was worried about Kate. Kate, who would not tell her if anything is wrong.

"The Viscount is happily wed to someone who suits him." Edwina said, one of her rehearsed responses, "He and my sister are most happy together. I am so pleased for them." 

Siena nods silently. If she can tell that Edwina is lying, she hides it well and thankfully says nothing aloud. "I wish you every future happiness, Miss Sharma." 


When Edwina returns to the palazzo, she bathes and dresses in her nightgown before writing a response letter to Kate. She discussed visiting museums and reading but not her late nights with Friedrich or the gin and spirits that Melissa allowed her to try. 

We went to the opera, and Don Giovanni still gives me cause to weep. The lead soprano, Siena Rosso, lived in London just before we did. It is a shame that she left, for she is incredibly talented.

But is this not cruel? To write and not speak to her face to face? Could it be misconstrued as the stirrings from a vindictive woman scorned? She took the parchment, sitting down in front of the fireplace. It fed the fire, as she decided to speak to Kate in person when she returned to England. 

She wrote another letter for her mother and sister, saying she visited the opera and a gallery and detailing how delicious the truffles in her pasta were at dinner. She was distracted as Friedrich climbed up on her balcony. 

"Hello, again." He greeted and she frowned at him as he removed his boots before stepping inside. He noticed the conflict on her face, kneeling down next to her in front of the fire as he saw the parchment break and be consumed by the flames.

"What is the matter, Edwina?" He asked, taking her hand.

"Did you know about Lord Bridgerton and Miss Rosso? The singer?" Edwina demanded.

Friedrich nodded, "Yes. She was his mistress when I was in London. From what little I know, he cared for her." He did keep an ear out for any gossip around the Bridgertons when he came to England. He had wished to marry Daphne, after all. They were a good and well-respected family - well, when he knew them. 

"Do you think that he…could he still take a mistress?" Edwina asked quietly. 

"I hope not. I did not have the chance to know him as well but what I did learn, he was loyal to Miss Rosso. He is a rake, by all accounts, but I believe he tries to be honourable, especially to women he loves. Sisters, mothers, wives." Friedrich assured but he noticed how her face fell slightly, as he accidentally confirmed for her his lack of care. She was not his sister or relation; he had no reason to be careful with her reputation or name.

"And you?" Edwina asked, "Do you have a mistress? An actress?" 

"I have had my dalliances. For the moment, I do not." Friedrich said, "For I have you."

She folded her arms, "Other noblewomen?" 

"Sometimes." Friedrich admitted, "I will admit. I am rather indiscriminate with the women I choose. I have had flirtations and relations with Duchesses and maids, but they were never uncaring." 

"So, am I a rather exotic addition to your list?" Edwina quizzed.

His face grew serious, for the prince did not view women as creatures to conquer but as people to learn about.

"No. I would not do you the dishonour. You fascinate me, yes. But it is not your culture, no matter how interesting it is, but you. A shy thing in ballrooms who allows a strange man to climb into her rooms." Friedrich said, then he smiled self-depreciatingly, "I cannot enter any relationship without respecting or caring for the other party. That is how I relate to the world. I greatly admire you, Edwina. Truly. Not only because you allow me to practice my climbing, for peacetime means I am not doing so much climbing." 

"I have little choice, for you seem to be able to climb so easily into my chambers!"

"Tell Signor Cosimo to invest in another wall for his fortress to protect the precious objects inside." 

"I do not count." 

"Yes, you do. I cannot stop thinking about you." He whispered, "You are always in my thoughts, in the morning and at night." 

Edwina looked at him, gently stroking his cheek.

"Do you want some tea?" Is what comes out of her mouth and she sighs, shutting her eyes as he looks at her, amused.

"I would. It smells delicious." He said and as she stood, but froze up on hearing a knock on her door.

"Under the bed!" She hissed and Friedrich did so, crawling under the large bed as Edwina blew out the candles to dim the light around her bed. 

When Melissa pokes her head in and sees Edwina sitting at her desk, quill in hand as she signs her letter, she smiles at her.

"Just wanted to see if you needed anything else. Sofia is still wandering around." She whispered kindly.

"No, I am well." Edwina assured, "I have water and tea. Good night." 

"Sleep well," Melissa whispered before shutting the door.

Friedrich rolls out from under the bed as Edwina sits on the floor. He has a grin on his face, "You should have told her." 

"And have her write to her mother, who will tell my mother who will swim here to have me thrown in a convent?" Edwina listed, "Why, yes! I should do that!" 

"I bare my soul, and you are so cruel to me, Edwina," Friedrich replied teasingly, making her smile and roll her eyes. She leaned forward on her knees.

"We are fun, yes?" Edwina asked, "My heart cannot take anything else at present." 

"We are a lot of fun. The only fun I am having." Friedrich promised.

Rather than any sort of intimacy, they merely sat in the peaceful silence together as Friedrich told her tales of his childhood. His favourite cake that originated in the Black Forest region and how his wonderful late aunt used to tuck them all in, even if she had a busy evening. 

"What are you sketching?" He asked. Edwina had picked up a pad of paper that she had hidden away and sketched as he spoke. 

"You." She said, turning it around. She had been working on it for the past few nights using charcoal. Friedrich took the page that she offered him. 

He smiled, "You have made me look far prettier than I am. Thank you." 

Edwina shook her head. He was incredibly modest at times, despite looking as if he had been sculpted. She gently cupped his face, kissing him one last time before he was scaling down her balcony and running into the night.


On her last week of being in Florence, as April turned to May, Melissa called Edwina to her private sitting room one evening. The younger girl had already put on her nightdress and robe, and she nervously entered the room. Her sitting room looked more like a study, a large table with a map of the country spread across it as she planned to convince her husband to connect waterways to more of the population. 

"My Lady?" Edwina spoke timidly, "You asked to see me?"

"Come in, Edwina. You may call me Melissa right away. We are practically family." Melissa said, turning away from the table. She invited Edwina to sit with her on the red armchairs in front of the fire.

Edwina sat down across from her as Melissa poured them both a cup of a clear liquid from the small trolley that looked like water. But the glimmer in her eyes told her it was not water. She watched as Edwina brought the glass to her lips and sipped.

Edwina let out a hacking cough as the liquid burned her throat, "That is rather strong! What is it?" Edwina asked, putting it down.

"Russian vodka. A gift from a cousin." Melissa told her, then gave her a glass of red wine, "I just wished to see the look on your face! Gin is more your taste, then?"

Edwina nodded, "I suppose so." 

Melissa leaned back, tucking her feet under her on the chair, eyes on the flames, "I am glad that this city has helped rather refine your taste before you return to England. Wine, clothes, art and it seems men. Why have a Viscount when you could have a Prince?"

Edwina froze, looking up at her as Melissa continued, cool as ever. It was as if she were discussing the weather or the mundane tasks of the day, "I know all that goes on in this house. It is my duty. And well, Bianca was rather annoyed to see that beautiful rose bush outside ruined most days. The dogs are too well-behaved. But your prince is not." 

"I have not told my husband, for he would call his Highness out, and we need not start a war with Prussia." Melissa continued, "He likes you a lot. He finds you sweet."

"We have not... nothing irreversible has been done." Edwina stuttered out, "I am, I am sorry." 

"I would be rather insulted if not impressed," Melissa said. She shook her head, leaning back, "I did not foresee this. A different form of insanity." 

Edwina looked down at the deep red liquid in her glass, "Have you written to your mother?"

"No." Melissa said, and she let out a sigh of relief, "I do not think she would believe me. She would think I was trying to drive her insane. You have the appearance of a blushing virgin. So sweet and innocent and yet..." 

Edwina shook her head, "Why must a young lady be only one thing?" She wondered, looking into the dancing flames, "So much has happened - so many strange things that I could not foresee. It felt nice... to do something different. To have a friend who understands and to feel desired in a way. Nothing of consequence has been done, but I almost wish it could. To truly ruin me, so that people really have something to write about when I return to England. Something that is actually my fault."

"Good. You have learned something." Melissa replied, "Look like the innocent flower but be the serpent under it."

"I have not..." Edwina began to protest but quietened. She had become deceitful in a way. She was not the same, she thinks.

She leaned back, sipping her wine and contemplating Melissa's words.


Edwina was instructed by Melissa to meet her in the pavilion in the grounds at midday. Edwina entered to see chairs and a sofa set up, but Melissa was not there. Perhaps she was occupied. She did not mind, she could wait. She sat on the sofa, adjusting the cushions and waited.

A few minutes later, she heard the door open and turned around. She was surprised to see Friedrich who was surprised to see her as he stepped inside cautiously.

"What are you doing here?" Edwina asked.

"I was invited." Friedrich said, sitting down next to her, "But it appears Madame de Medici is still busy."

Friedrich removed his coat, feeling warm. Both were fidgeting, nervous. Edwina, most of all. Was there to be a duel? Forced to wed? 

Friedrich, on the other hand, was merely intrigued. He took out his pocket watch, seeing that they had been sitting there for about twenty minutes.

"Where is she?" Edwina wondered aloud. Melissa should have been here a while ago. 

"I am not used to being kept waiting," Friedrich remarked, making her laugh. She smiled, glancing sidewards at him. Did she look unusually pretty today? He thought to himself as she looked away. No, she was always beautiful, especially in her favourite colour. 

"What shall we do?" Edwina asked. She looked at Friedrich, who was staring at her. 

Friedrich drew her in for a gentle kiss, and she responded enthusiastically, kissing him fervently as he moved to kneel in front of her, kissing her neck.

Hiking her up on the seat, their eyes met as Edwina nodded silently, wanting this. She was choosing this, knowing all the risks and what she wanted. She wanted something to remember.

He undid the front of her dress, exposing her chemise and corset, as she helped remove his waistcoat. A gasp escaped her throat as he kissed up her covered legs. He undid the pink ribbons holding up her stocking, kissing the exposed skin on her thighs, down to her calves, doing the same on her left leg. He pulled down her short underskirt, and then he placed her legs over his shoulders, his eyes focused on hers as he licked at her cunt fervently, groaning at the taste of her.

He stopped before she climaxed, kissing her again as she desperately grabbed at him, her lips on his neck and she cheekily nipped at his neck, smiling when he looked at her. He lay her down gently on the floor. Edwina reached up and stroked his cheek, studying him 

He thrust into her, kissing her neck as they moved together. Edwina cried out, her arm wrapped around him, keeping him close, her hands in his hair.

He stopped, drawing her up in his lap and she sunk down on him, a whine escaping her lips before she met his every thrust. She climaxed, kissing him to muffle her moans as he pulled out to come, his seed on the carpet and her thighs.

They both fell to the floor, sighing, sated and out of breath. It was reckless. Terrible. Wonderful.

"That was…" Edwina said in between content sighs and gasps.

"Indeed." Friedrich agreed, just as satisfied. 

She turned her head, smiling, "We can not do that again. I am returning to England." 

"I know." Friedrich smiled sadly, gently stroking her cheek. Both could feel this ache in their chests, the thought of being separated, even if lust clouded their judgement.

"Thank you," Edwina whispered.

"We may write." Edwina promised, when they were dressed and presentable again, "I shall give you my address and you must write. Promise me?" She would have to go and marry some old man. This was perhaps the first and last passion she would feel in her life.

He kissed her hands longingly as she pressed her forehead against his, "I promise. I swear it on my honour." 

She walked back to the main house, trying not to cry or weep, her expression unreadable.

"Sofia?" She found her lady's maid in her chambers, "Do you know where madonna is?"

"She is out all day, Signora."


 London had a vibrance to it, given it was the beginning of the new season. She had missed the presentations and Lady Danbury's ball, but she was happy to be back with her mother and to see her sister. She had brought them presents in Florence - a book of poetry for Kate and materials for her mother, who enjoyed her crafts again. 

"Your letters were rather infrequent. We were worried." Mary said as the three women sat in the garden for tea. Kate, her stomach round as she was halfway through her pregnancy, was glad to see her sister.

Edwina suppresses an eye roll, "I apologize. I was enjoying myself. Was that not the whole point of that trip?" 

Kate looks renewed, beautiful as ever. She has always believed her sister to be gorgeous, but seeing her allow herself to be was new and more than welcome. 

"How did Francesca's presentation go?" She asked.

"Really well," Kate said, her eyes darting to their mother.

"What is it?" Edwina asked, annoyed.

Mary cleared her throat, "Well, Frannie was named Diamond."

"Diamond of the Season?" Edwina repeated, "I do wish her the best."  

She did. Edwina tried to suppress the cruel part of her that wished for a monstrous man much like her brother - respected, handsome - would come in and sweep dear unsuspecting Francesca off her feet. Would he even have the chance, with a male guardian, to protect her?

"You are still much desired by many gentlemen," Kate assured.

"I am no Diamond, didi." Edwina joked, "I am an unmarried young lady who must seek a sensible match, even if her chances are incredibly slim." 

"They are not slim." Kate said, "Mama and I made a list."

"Groceries?"

"Gentlemen. They were asking questions about you. Not the silly kind either." Mary told her.

"I suppose they need a form of entertainment." 

Kate frowned, she and her mother worried for her. Edwina had always been the optimist of the family; the one to look on the bright side of life and look for solutions. 

Edwina stood, exhaling, "I am being realistic. It would be delusional to be otherwise. I do not wish to speak of this any longer. Thank you for trying, but I know and you both know, when you have removed your blinders for me, that my chance of making a respectable match this season is rather low. Those gentlemen wish to laugh at me and wonder why an ungrateful brat such as I ran from such a respectable man in society." 

Her mother and sister are still worried but drop the subject of marriage, instead asking more about Florence. She tells them of paintings and the books she brought. 

She is a good young lady. She goes on promenades and the few teas she is invited to. She smiles in the face of people who whisper about her and she ignores the whispers and japes at her expense. She cries in her pillow at night.


Edwina remembered that at the beginning of her debut, she was besieged by suitors. But Lady Danbury's drawing room was full of suitors this season, clamouring for her attention.

She was besieged with gifts instead, it seems.

First came the flowers. Her favourites - bright gold marigolds, fragrant white magnolias and pink roses that turn Lady Danbury's sitting room into a florist's back room.

"There was no note with any of the bouquets." Agatha remarked as the three ladies arranged the bouquets, helping the maids. 

Mary said with a teasing smile, "Perhaps a secret admirer? Or Her Majesty sought to write to her nephew about Edwina? It is good either way." 

"He is not even in London." Edwina protested, "I highly doubt it, mama."

Lady Whistledown's Society Papers - May 22nd, 1816

Dearest gentle readers,

This season is most intriguing already! The newest Incomparable maybe Miss Francesca Bridgerton, who entertains a range of suitors, despite her gatekeeping guardians, but it is Miss Edwina who appears to be drawing much attention, returned from the continent. There have been numerous deliveries to the home of Lady Danbury, and one has to wonder who it is that sees something in has-been Diamond!

Edwina was incredibly confused. She had thought the flowers a kindness from her sister or Lady Basset, but they were not. Then, she had received books she had planned on looking for. Tied up in silk ribbons and bound in perfect leather.

Boxes of macaroons from her favourite bakery on a Sunday. 

Then on Monday, just as she hoped it was over, a velvet box containing a necklace with tiny and delicate pink diamonds.

She looked out of her bedroom window and unfortunately, the height was not enough for her to die so she would not have to answer questions.


She accepted an invitation to dine at Bridgerton House; it was a family dinner and Kate so desperately wanted her to be there.

She was sat with the Duke of Hastings and her sister at one end of the table.

"I hear you have a secret admirer, Miss Sharma." Simon said, gauging everyone's attention.

"I did not realize matchmaking was part of The Time's daily column, My Lord." Edwina remarked dryly. Simon chuckled.

"Who could it be? Some mysterious Italian you have failed to tell us about?" Francesca asked, rather excited.

"Or Lord Lumely?" Anthony said, and Edwina looked at him, raising an eyebrow "He was asking about you. He wondered if he could call on you." 

"Why should he ask that of you, My Lord?" Edwina asked, like the little idiot she used to be. She knew why; he was her 'protector' now. Her brother. 

"Well, we saw one another." Anthony began awkwardly and looked to Kate desperately wanting her to take over.

"You liked him, yes?" Kate asked, "He was rather sweet."

"Terrible poet." Benedict added lightly, "But a good egg." 

"I did not have time to rather like him." Edwina replied to her sister, "He only escorted me to the races last season and seemed to disappear, as did every other suitor." She sipped her wine as there was an awkward silence. Anthony squirmed, given his presence caused other suitors to leave her last season.

After dinner, Kate asked Edwina to come with her upstairs, wanting to show her the nursery.

"You are never here and I wanted your approval on the library." Kate said as they walked into the light blue room.

A white crib was set up, with a small bookshelf in the corner. A beautiful rocking chair in another corner. It was beautiful. Edwina had a look at the selection - fairy tales and folk tales, much like the ones in their appa's library.

"The book selection is good. I would recommend the Brother's Grimm." Edwina said with a smile.

"Fairy tales with a good death - of course." Kate smiled, then clasped her hand together, "Edwina, are you well?"

"Of course I am." Edwina said, with a shrug, "Why would I not be?"

Kate took a step towards her, "We did not speak about Anthony's role in your life - as your protector and I understand that you may be annoyed." 

"Annoyed? Why should I be annoyed?" Edwina questioned, "That my fate rests in the hands of the man who was so very careful with it the first time?" She asked, sarcasm dripping from every word, then she looked at her sister, "You could have told me. You wrote often enough and when I returned. You could have told me." 

"I hoped you would be okay with it, but that was optimistic wishful thinking." Kate said, "But know that I and mama vet these suitors, so you need not worry." 

"Do not make me sound so cruel, akka." Edwina said, "Why on Earth should I trust Lord Bridgerton to have my best interests?" 

"We are family, and he cares for you." Kate said, "He truly wishes to atone for his actions and for all of us to be family. Especially with the baby coming." 

Edwina shut her eyes. She did not want to have this conversation. She truly did not wish to, but she needed her sister to understand.

Be the serpent under it.

"Kate, imagine if in some god-awful world, Lord Bridgerton and I had married? That I had not seen what I saw? How would you feel about me asking you to spend time with him? Would you not hurt? Be saddened? An ache in your heart?"

Kate looked away briefly but nodded silently, knowing what she said was true. It hurt her to see Edwina and Anthony courting and engaged last year. Even with how happy her sister was, she was still hurt. That was the dilemma Edwina was experiencing - the happiness for her sister at being in love whilst despising the man she was in love with.

"Are you still in love with Anthony?" Kate asked nervously.

"No. No I am not. Rather, the opposite." Edwina said honestly, "I hate how he treated you. I hate how I was merely a disposable thing that fulfilled his needs. His hypocrisy. I hate him. He was not forced to do what he did, to ruin me, my reputation and my perception of the world. I still leave this house and hear people whisper of my deficiencies because no one asks what sort of monster I saved myself from. No one asks why I ran, they only care that I did. And yet, I must call him brother and smile and compliment his generosity whenever I leave this house. I do so for you, Kate, because I love you. But if you love me, do not ask me to do so in private. Allow me that reprieve. Just because you once could mask your feelings to me about him, that does not mean I should do so now. That is not how love works, Kate! That is not how us, as sisters, should be." 

Kate was surprised by her words, but she was correct, "You are right. We promised one another honesty to rebuild trust. Thank you for being honest with me. I do not want you to hide from me." She told her and then took her hands, "But I do miss you. I want you in this family." 

"I crossed an ocean to get away from him - from all of this - for a short time. I should have been rather direct." Edwina said.

"I will give you space." Kate whispered, wiping a stray tear. They both needed time.

"Thank you." Edwina whispered, "Just... give me time. I love you, Kate. More than anyone - well, aside from mama." 

"I do not think anyone can love more than mama does!"


A surprise invitation came to Edwina from St James. Queen Charlotte wished to have her for tea. That was a surprise. But Edwina's heart raced. Did she know? Friedrich had said in his last letter that he had not returned his aunt's correspondence.

She and Charlotte walked in the gardens, her Pomeranians trailing behind.  Edwina was rather transfixed on the yellow bows that were all over her grey wig, hoping to speak of that than her dwindling prospects.

"I hear you have an admirer, Miss Sharma." Charlotte said, "Tell me, do you know who it could be?" 

Edwina shrugged, "Not at all. All the suppliers take great pride in their confidentiality. Not even Lady Danbury could get them to tell her!" 

Charlotte laughed, a glint in her eyes, "It is wonderful when a man works so hard to impress a woman. Speaking of suitors, I understand you were in Florence with Agatha's eldest daughter. My nephew was there - did you meet him?" 

Edwina looked to the Queen, "Briefly. He was very kind and a good dancer." She said carefully.

"He is." Charlotte agreed, "The boy does not return my letters! I do not care how wonderful of a soldier he is, he cannot find the time to reply to his dear auntie's letters. If he comes here, you must correct that for I hear you are a most reliable writer." 

"Indeed, your Majesty." Edwina said, smiling weakly. Charlotte noticed and stopped, turning to Edwina.

"Edwina. Do not give up on love." She advised gently, "It is always right around the corner, waiting for you." 

She returned to Danbury House, seeing a horse outside. Perhaps a messenger. She hoped all was well. The staff seemed on edge, nervous and Edwina wondered if Lady Danbury was throwing a last minute soiree. She walked into the drawing room, expecting to see her mama and Lady Danbury, but there was a man. 

A blonde tall man who turned to her. White shirt and dark trousers, his coat resting on one of the settees as Newton sniffed it.

Friedrich was standing there. In the flesh. Edwina gasped, placing a hand over her mouth.

"Hello." He breathed out as Edwina took slow steps towards him.

"Hello." She replied.

Edwina stared up at him. He was here. This was not one of her dreams or some sort of food poisoning. She thought of Queen Charlotte's words - love is just around the corner. It rather appeared to be.

"You are...not in Vienna." 

"No." He confirmed.

"So you lied in your letter?" 

"What would you have said if I was following you to London?"

Edwina folded her arms, "I would have told you not to. That you were a fool." She whispered.

"I am a fool. You are so mean to me, mein lieben." Friedrich said, smiling and she fought a smile.

Edwina sighed, remembering all the gifts sent. Of course they were from him. She hated him. She loved him.

"You turned Lady Danbury's drawing room into a botanical garden and I do believe I need an armed guard for that necklace!" Edwina complained, "I thought that you were toying with me."

Friedrich shook his head, "Oh, my darling. I would never. I love you too much. I have come here for you, but work was in the way. I came to London as soon as I could, and wished to convey my love in other ways."  

She scratched the back of her head, "You...you love me?" 

"Of course I do. How could I not?" Friedrich said.

"I do not wish to be your obligation." Edwina said firmly.

"Not an obligation. Never." Friedrich said, "But I was to go home. And then I remembered where you were and that felt like home." 

Edwina felt herself melt, sniffling as she watched him and he hugged her. She wrapped her arms around his waist.

"I missed you." He murmured into her hair.

"I've missed you too." Edwina replied, and looked up to him, cupping his face in her hands, "You foolish, annoying prince." He laughed at her, "Do not laugh! I am very cross!" 

"You are adorable when cross." Friedrich chuckled and leaned down to kiss her. She kissed him back, the two holding each other 

"What on Earth!" 

They separated, their bubble broken by the outraged voice of Lady Mary Sharma. When she returned from dropping in on a friend, she did not expect to see her youngest daughter kissing a strange man in the drawing room.

"Mama, I believe you know of Prince Friedrich?" Edwina said with a nervous titter. He bowed with a sheepish smile.

"Lady Mary. Edwina has told me many wonderful things about you." Friedrich greeted. Mary merely stared at him looking between the two of them. Her keen eyes saw how familiar they were with one another.

"Has she told you I know how to shoot?" She asked sharply.

"Mama!"

"No, but I am most curious." Friedrich said, smoothly stepping away a small distance from Edwina, "And I would like to marry your daughter, with your blessing."

Mary blinked several times, looking at Edwina who shut her eyes in embarrassment as Friedrich grinned.

"Agatha!" She yelled for her friend, "Get in here now! We have a wedding to plan!"

Edwina smiled, looking at Friedrich, who was just as excited.

"So, Florence for our honeymoon?" 

Notes:

Let me know what you think!