Chapter Text
Harry woke the next morning, and laid in bed for a moment longer than usual. The shimmering pattern of morning sunlight through the rippling surface of the lake cast hypnotic patterns on his floor and up the wall, and Harry couldn’t help but stare at the blurry outlines as he lay in bed. Talking with Snape the night before felt like a load had been lifted of his shoulders. Snape’s added perspective was just what he had needed it seemed. He didn’t push on any of Harry’s plans and ideas, but nudged gently at them, let him know that he was doing good without directly saying so. Harry sighed. It reminded him of his first day at Snape’s apartment that summer, when Snape slowly led Harry through his list of rules, teaching him gently what was wrong and right. Harry stood slowly as he put on his glasses. Had that day only been a month or so ago? He felt like a different person. He had his own rules now, made his own decisions. It was a weird feeling when he thought back to his old worldview.
Hogwarts was also so strange, he mused as he washed his hair in the showers. He was some political figurehead now, with people vying to be on his side. Harry snorted a little. Would these people still follow him if they’d seen him just months ago? Crouching in Petunia’s rose bushes, dehydrated and starving? Maybe they would have. Malfoy’s parents directed him to befriend Harry at first glance. Would others have done the same? Harry stared at himself in the mirror as he got dressed, looking at where his ribs still stuck out, the silvery scars that stood out against this shoulder, old bruising that was still faintly greenish, despite Snape's healing balms. He didn't look powerful, he looked weak, and scared. He pulled his undershirt over his head, feeling the soft silk against those old scars. As he pulled his school robes on, he straightened up pushing his shoulders back and his chest out, like the older Slytherins did. The green lining shone brightly, nearly matching the green in his eyes. He tied his tie with deft fingers, thinking about how he'd asked Snape to tie it for him the night before school. He took a step back, combing through his hair with one hand as he straightened his shirt with the other, and looked in the mirror again.
He looked powerful now. He needed to look powerful. Snape’s words echoed in his head as he tried to make his hair lay flat. Act like you know what you’re doing. Even if you don’t. People follow confidence, not correctness. He'd scribbled those words at the bottom of a page in his journal the night before, after talking with Snape.
Harry sighed again. As much as it all made sense, it was still a lot to take on. Everyone else around him seemed so confident in it. They’d been trained to do this since young. They’d taken etiquette classes, been taught how to deal with the politics, and still, some of them weren’t even good at it, like Crabbe and Goyle who admitted it openly. How was he supposed to compete with their years of experience if even they couldn't do it well?
Harry packed his bag for his day, double checking his schedule. He started the day with charms, then followed with defense and then double potions. He double checked he had his potions kit, checking his syllabus to ensure he pulled the right ingredients out of his trunk, and carefully set it aside to grab after lunch. He wondered what would happen with defense. Snape said he’d be taking it privately, but how exactly was that going to work?
Harry sat down on his bed again and stared out into the depths of the lake, watching a school of fish swim by, the light catching on their scales as they twisted and turned as one. He wished he could be like those fish. They always seemed to know which direction everyone else was going, never going the wrong way. Did they have rules? Or were they flexible, just doing what they needed to do? His old rules were certainly easier to understand and navigate. But these new, flexible rules he’d created were better, he reminded himself. He could learn about things now. That was the comfort in this whole mess. He might have to learn about things to do then right, but at least he got to learn. With that thought, he slung his bag over his shoulder and left to the common room. He had a half-hour before breakfast, and wanted to recopy his charms essay to fix the mistakes he’d marked in his last revision.
Breakfast was a solemn affair, much more than usual. The whole Slytherin table seemed to be hushed, waiting. Even Zabini’s attempted argument with Daphne about whether Italian coffee or French pastries were more important in a good breakfast felt flat. Harry could even hear the conversations from the Ravenclaw table behind him, they were so quiet. Harry crunched a piece of toast thoughtfully. They’d finally had every one of their first year classes, which was a bit of a relief. But the looming issue of defense that day and the first year meeting tomorrow gave him a sense of dread that turned every bite to dust in his mouth. He sighed, and dipped his toast into his tea. Just at that moment, the mail arrived, and a large barn owl nearly knocked over the pitcher of orange juice in front of him as it stuck out it’s leg to Greengrass. Harry dropped his toast into the mug as he grabbed the orange juice out of the way. As he righted the pitcher, away from the other owls that were taking off nearby, he noted just how many more owls than normal had landed at the Slytherin table. He leaned over to ask Theo, who was looking around carefully.
“What’s going on? Why are there so many letters?”
Nearly half of the Slytherin students had received a letter, and as they read them, hushed conversations began up and down the table.
Theo leaned over to respond, eyes still raking the table, watching the students who had received letters talking quietly with their friends about the contents of the letters.
“They’re getting letters from their families, weighing in about the meeting tomorrow. Most of them likely defer to their parents in Family matters, or at least get advice.”
Harry pushed away his plate. It made him sick to his stomach to think about the other students, ones he didn’t even know their names, debating about him, potentially angering their families, or making them proud. All based on him.
“Mr. Nott, Mr. Potter.”
They both jumped as Snape sidled up behind them.
“Yes sir?” Harry turned in his seat, grateful for the distraction.
“From now onwards, you have a free period whenever you would normally have Defense Against the Dark arts. It will be replaced with a tutoring session Saturday morning, and until after flying ends, after dinner on Thursday’s. Once flying ends, your second session will be during that time slot.”
Theo nodded as Snape continued.
“Your free periods will be a privilege, not a right. They still take place within the school day, and you will be expected to use them for studying, and other productive tasks. Should you abuse this free time, or waste your tutoring times, we will make this arrangement less beneficial to you. I will be your Defense Professor, and you will attend classes along with another first year Hufflepuff student, a Ravenclaw third year, a fifth year Slytherin, and a fifth-year Gryffindor.”
He paused, looking between the two boys to gauge their reactions, before continuing, “Here are your official transfer slips. They contain the new schedule, as well as the location of your new defense classes. I’d recommend keeping them on you, as you will need to show them if you are wandering around during your class times.”
He dropped the sheets of paper in front of each of them, and glided away without a second glance, further down the table to where the fifth-years were sitting.
Harry looked at his slip, eyes flitting down to where the reason for transfer was listed as: Medical.
He glanced at Theo’s, which said Parental Request.
Harry raised his eyebrows at Theo as he looked over at Harry’s paper. Theo shrugged.
“My father was complaining about the ex- muggle studies teacher being the defense against the dark arts teacher, and I think Snape offered him the option of moving me to private tutoring too,” Theo finally explained.
Harry nodded. It made sense, it would’ve been very suspicious for him to be the only one to have private tutoring of defense. He suspected the other members of the tutoring sessions were likely fabricated as well. It didn’t matter much to him honestly. He was just glad that Snape had managed to follow through on his promise of getting him out of that class. He had no desire to have a repeat of that first day.
Charms went quickly that day, a practical lesson on the Lumos charm, which Harry, Theo, Greengrass, Malfoy, and Zabini had already mastered. Professor Flitwick let all five of them out of class early, with no homework, which was a nice break of pace from the previous classes they’d had that week. Harry had been beginning to wonder just how much homework they could possibly have if this was just their first week of classes.
As they arrived back to the common room, Harry headed to the nook that held a political library and selected Politics of the Late 20th Century: The Rise and Fall of Houses, that Zabini had recommended, and returned to the seating area to find an argument in place. Greengrass and Malfoy were standing nearly nose to nose, glaring at each other. Theo looked concerned, but Zabini was laughing, snacking on a chocolate frog as he watched them.
“You should know better than to say something like that to me,” Snarled Malfoy, who was turning pink against his blond hair.
“Why? Are you going to go send an owl to mummy and daddy and tell them all about how you’re destroying the reputation of their house?” Greengrass looked unruffled as she spoke.
“I outrank you, and you know it.”
“Not for long you wont, if you keep dragging your own Family’s name through the mud!” Interjected Zabini, who was snickering as he spoke.
“I’ll have you know—“
They never did find out what Malfoy wanted them to know however, as Snape swept up to them in that moment.
“Mr. Malfoy, Professor Flitwick said you were released from class early. Your mother is here to have a word with you. Family matters.” Snape said cooly, ignoring the argument he’d just entered.
Zabini began laughing even harder, until Snape turned his gaze upon him.
“And what exactly is so funny about that, Mr. Zabini?”
Zabini managed to school his face into something resembling shame as he muttered, “Nothing sir,” but the effect was ruined by his failed efforts to avoid bursting into laughter again.
“What’d I miss?” Asked Harry as he sat, watching the retreating backs of Malfoy and Snape. Greengrass huffed and headed back towards the dorm.
“Malfoy made a comment about her family always following the wrong kind of people,” Theo explained, “Apparently they’ve backed the losing minister the last three times.”
“And then Greengrass made a comment about his Family’s known ties to Veela blood, something about fucking the wrong kind,” Zabini said, and nearly burst out laughing again.
Harry couldn’t help but snicker a little.
“Is it true?” He couldn’t help but ask.
“From everything I’ve heard, probably, though no Malfoy would ever admit it,” said Theo, who was relaxing with his own book.
“I’m going to grab a snack, you two want anything?” Asked Zabini as he stood and stretched.
“We just had breakfast,” said Theo dryly, but his comment was ignored as Zabini headed towards the order form.
Theo rolled his eyes.
“I don’t know how he does it.” He sighed.
The three of them sat in comfortable silence, Theo and Harry reading and Zabini practicing wizards chess, leaning against the foot of the couch, relaxing on the floor and resting his chin on the low coffee table in the center of the grouping.
“Y’know, the game looks far more interesting when you’re sitting on the same level as the pieces,” He commented, as a black knight smashed a white pawn.
“Why do you always sit on the floor?” Asked Harry. He’d been curious for a while now.
Zabini shrugged. “It’s just comfortable. I can lay down, stretch out, untie Theo’s shoes…” He trailed off as he did just that.
“Hey, knock it off,” grumbled Theo, aiming a half-hearted kick at Zabini, who easily dodged it.
Harry was trying to read his book, knowing it would be important information, but his mind kept drifting towards the meeting. He almost wanted the whole day to skip by so that he didn't need to worry any more about it.
The end of the period came and went, and the common room was full of students on break before lunch. It still had that eerie quiet that their table had had at breakfast, and it made him even more uncomfortable.
Finally, the bell for the start of lunch rang, and Zabini and Theo both stood, stretching. Harry sighed, looking down at where he'd reread the same passage about a previous minister of magic's policies about 12 times, not processing a word of it.
"I need to grab my stuff for potions," He said, shrugging his bag up on his shoulder as the other two turned towards the door.
"We have potions next? I need to grab mine too," said Zabini, vaulting over the back of the couch to head towards the dorms.
"I'll wait for you two," said Theo, and he sat back down.
Harry wondered idly, as he grabbed his potions kit and shoved it into his bag, if it had just been him that needed to grab something, Theo would still have waited. He shoved the idea out of his head as soon as it crossed his mind. It wouldn't have mattered anyways, there'd be plenty of people heading down to lunch.
He met up with Theo and they stood by the door as Zabini came jogging over, his bag hanging halfway off his arm.
"You're going to spill your potions kit everywhere like that," said Theo rolling his eyes as he pulled Zabini's bag up his arm.
Harry stood awkwardly off to the side. Theo and Zabini's casual comfort with each other was always strange for him. He couldn't imagine being that close with someone, letting them touch him in such a casual way, without even seeming to notice. Theo wasn't like that with everyone, but Zabini was. Harry had realized that quickly, from the way he leaned on his classmates knees casually when he sat on the floor, or the way he would playfully push and shove with the others as he laughed. It was weird to Harry.
Harry sighed as he trailed behind the other boys, letting the crowds of people moving slowly towards the great hall bring him towards lunch. Would he ever be able to act normal? Just casually talking and joking with others, without reviewing his rules in his head in every social situation? He certainly hoped so, but he didn't know how. He sighed again, as he sat himself between Goyle and Theo at the table. Malfoy was back, looking subdued, but normal. Harry wondered what was said in the meeting between him and his mother as he ladled himself a bowl of soup.
"It'll be ok Harry," said Theo, passing him a slice of bread to dip in his soup before Harry had had the chance to ask him to pass it across the pitcher of pumpkin juice.
"Huh?" Harry looked up quickly. How had Theo known what he was thinking about?
"The meeting," said Theo, giving him a reassuring smile, "I promise you we will have it under control. You just need to sit back, swear the pact, and let me and Blaise handle most of the talking. Just look confident."
Harry nodded and took a large spoonful of soup to avoid responding. Of course the meeting. Watching Zabini and Theos casual interactions had wiped the thought of the meeting from his mind for the first time that day. Now the looming worry sat in the back of his head again, giving him a tight, thick lump in his throat. He certainly didn't feel confident. He felt almost nauseous, imagining himself sitting in front of the whole of Slytherin house, trying to impress all those older students. He blinked hard, trying to slow his heartbeat, and took another spoonful of soup. It slid thickly past the lump in his throat, and he reached for his goblet of water just as Goyle nearly knocked it over, reaching for the basket of rolls.
Theo righted it quickly, just before it spilled over Harry's lap.
"Sorry," Grunted Goyle, as Pansy snickered from a few seats down.
"Be careful Greg," said Theo as he passed the basket behind Harry.
Harry fought the urge to sigh again, and forced down more of his soup. He didn't want Snape to see him skipping meals, especially right before potions. It wasn't fair. The more the day dragged on, the more worried and sick he felt, and the more cool and confident Theo seemed. Blaise was his usual loud self, laughing with a third year that Harry didn't recognize on Theo's other side. His elbow bumped Theo's slightly, and Theo jumped hard, his knee hitting the bottom of the table.
"My bad," mumbled Harry as he scooted over a little bit.
It was an extreme reaction even for Theo, who was usually a bit jumpy. Harry hesitated for a moment. Theo's reaction sparked a memory for him, a passage of the book he'd read the day before when researching the Septimus Pacturum.
Look past other people's exterior, read their body language to see how they really feel, what they are actually thinking.
He took a deep breath, and looked around him. The silence at Slytherin table from earlier in the day was gone, seemingly replaced with the usual loud chaos of a large table filled with teenagers and children, but as he looked around, he noticed everyone still seemed a bit subdued. Pansy, seated further down form him and across the table, was smiling and laughing with Malfoy, but she seemed paler than normal. Malfoy was grinning, but it seemed tight, forced, and the smile didn't seem to reach his eyes. Greengrass was reading at the table, ignoring the chaos around her, but her eyes kept glancing up and around, without moving her head. Their eyes met for a brief second, and she gave him a tight nod, before looking back down at her book, still not reading. Theo's knee was jigging under the table aggressively, nearly matching Zabini's usual hyperactive energy.
Harry's stomach unknotted a little as he realized, everyone around him was nervous too. They just showed it differently, or were better at hiding it. He made an effort to school his face into a more relaxed expression, and scraped his bowl clean with the heel of his roll.
"Ready to go?" Theo asked him. Harry nodded.
"We can use my kit today, we used yours on Monday," said Theo, swinging his leg over the bench.
Harry was all too aware of the other Gryffindor first years behind them as they walked down to the potions classroom.
"They won't try anything again," Said Greengrass from behind Harry's shoulder, startling Harry into Theo, who nearly tripped over the foot of his robe.
"Jumping around like frogs," snickered one of the Gryffindors passing by them.
"Sorry," apologized Greengrass, "I thought you saw me."
Harry gulped down the jolt of fear that had shot through him.
"Sorry, just a bit on edge today." He tried to give her a grin, but it felt more like a grimace on his face, and he dropped it quickly.
He didn't notice Zabini and Theo sharing a glance behind his back as they walked, now in a line of four.
Harry and Theo took the same seats as they had before, and pulled out their notes, remembering all too well Snape's humiliation of he Gryffindors from their previous potions class. Nott arranged his potions kit between them on the table, and Harry placed the cauldron over the burner, making sure it was stable and wouldn't fall over.
The bell rung, ushering in a couple of Gryffindor stragglers. Snape stood at the front of the room, giving them a glare that seemed as if it would melt straight through them, and Harry was suddenly glad he'd never made Snape mad.
"Essays. Pass them up to the front." Snape drawled.
Harry carefully stacked the essays passed up to him in a neat stack for Snape to collect. With a wave of his wand, Snape brought each pile up to the desk in the front of the room, in a much neater stack than Harry had managed.
"Who in here did not turn in an essay?"
Snape's glare swept the room again, and Harry's head swiveled to look too. His gaze fell on the red headed Weasley boy furiously scribbling in the far back corner of the Gryffindor side of the room.
Snape waved his wand again, and the sharp sound of ripping paper crossed the room as the boy's quill tip left a long gash in the paper as it flew off his desk.
Snape levitated it in front of his face, the messy scrawl and ink splotches showing through as he read aloud, "Ginger root is in this recipe because ginger is good for warts,- Mr. Weasley, the potion you were supposed to be writing about was the potion you made this week. A cure for boils, not warts. And recipe has only one 'i'. "
Harry couldn't help but snicker with the rest of the class. Weasley flushed redder than his hair.
"Twenty points from Gryffindor for deeming your very first homework assignment optional, and another ten points from Gryffindor for your abysmal spelling and handwriting Mr. Weasley. See me after class."
With a flick of his wand, the essay, still floating in front of the class, burnt to ash.
Harry gulped slightly, and made a mental note to always do the homework Snape assigned to them.
"Today, we will experiment with the differences brewing temperatures have on a potion's efficiency, or even success. You will brew two batches of cure for boils, one at the same temperature as before, and one at a significantly higher temperature."
He tapped his wand against the board, and it spun around to reveal the brewing instructions twice over.
"You copy the standard, I'll copy the modified," Harry whispered to Theo as the sound of scratching quills filled the classroom.
They copied each of the recipes quickly, before leaning forwards to compare the differences.
"Looks like we use way less of the porcupine quills," noted Theo.
"And we leave the ginger in for longer," said Harry.
"The modified makes less too," added Theo.
"And why do you think that might be?" Snape's silky smooth drawl made them both jump again.
"Um," started Harry.
"Does letting the ginger in for longer make it more potent?" Asked Theo, turning to face Snape.
Snape gave a short nod, and looked at Harry.
"Well," started Harry slowly, "last time when they," he tipped his head towards the Gryffindor side, "added the porcupine quills in before taking it off the fire, it exploded, so maybe the quills are more sensitive to the higher temperature?"
Snape nodded again. "Twenty points to Slytherin, for two well deduced and observed conclusions. This will be on a future exam."
He started to turn away, but changed his mind.
"For a bonus, Mr. Potter, do you know the names of the two Gryffindors who mistakenly added the quills at the wrong time?"
Harry thought for a moment, before sheepishly shaking his head.
"Names are important Mr. Potter. They have power, and you would do well to remember that."
With that rather cryptic statement, Snape turned and away to grill a pair of Gryffindor girls, who nearly knocked over their cauldron when Snape came up behind them.
They began work on their potion, carefully taking turns preparing the ingredients and adding them in, focusing carefully on the color of the potion and the number of stirs they needed. As they capped their vial of the standard recipe, and Theo raised his hand so that Snape could vanish the contents of their cauldron, and they could start the next one, they heard a shrill voice from across the room.
"Professor, Professor sir," called a girl with bushy hair, waving her hand in the air, "the-"
"Miss. Granger, we raise our hands in this class, and wait to be called upon." Snape whirled around, and was staring Granger down.
She had the instinct to look down for a moment, before her eyes snapped back up. "But sir-"
"I still have not called upon you Miss. Granger," Snape said with a sigh, "five points from Gryffindor for failing to follow the simplest of decisions."
Snape stared at her for a moment, as she sat with her arm raised straight in the air like a flagpole, lips pressed tightly together.
Snape sighed deeply. "Yes Miss. Granger?"
"Sir, sir, the book doesn't have anything on the modified recipe. How are we supposed to compare the colors for each step when the book doesn't even mention it? And what is the point of brewing something not part of the book when we already know the best way to make it? Shouldn't we focus on what is going to provide the best results?" She asked, all in one breath.
"Well, Miss. Granger, lets focus on the stupidest of your questions."
She let out a small gasp, which Snape ignored as he continued.
"If we are brewing the same potion again, just at a different temperature, and there is no mention in your instructions of any color variances to the original, where do you think we could find color references for the very same recipe you just brewed while referencing your textbook?"
He looked around, and seemed to be holding back a smile as he looked back at her and continued sarcastically, "Why, perhaps, in your textbook. As for your second question, who might have a guess about that?" He looked around again. Harry felt it in his gut before Snape's eyes alighted upon his.
"Mr. Potter, Mr. Nott, you two had some interesting theories earlier, would you care to ruminate upon Miss. Granger's other question?"
"The book might not be listing the most effective way to brew a cure for boils potion." Theo said, a trace of humor in his voice.
Harry kept his voice level as he continued Theo's sentence, "It might list a simple version of a common potion for beginners. A more effective method of brewing might exist by raising the temperature, allowing the mixture to become more potent and concentrated."
"Correct, Mr. Potter, Mr. Nott, twenty points to Slytherin. Did you have any more questions, Miss. Granger? Or would you like to think, and wait to be called on, before you ask another question?"
She shook her head, and looked down, her bushy hair hiding her face. Harry had a sudden flash of realization as he turned back towards his cauldron, where Snape had just vanished the leftovers of their first potion. The Gryffindors likely saw him as cruel, but he was teaching a lesson at the same time. To think through questions before asking them for the sake of asking them.
He shook his head slightly as he leaned in towards the paper with Theo, squinting through the hazy classroom, now filled with the smoke from the brewing cauldrons. They diligently went through the second recipe, each of them catching a mistake from the other. harry nearly started skinning the ginger before wiping his potions knife off, and Theo had nearly added the lacewing flies a step too early, but they caught each other’s mistakes before any issues occurred, and successfully made a near perfect potion. Harry labeled the vials carefully, and deposited them at the front of the room as Theo cleaned up their workspace.
Snaps dismissed them with no homework for the weekend, which Harry was grateful for, seeing as he had too many other things to worry about as it was. As he walked with Theo back to the common room, his gut began to twist with dread again. Potions class had been nice, almost relaxing, and it was a good distraction, but now there were no more proper classes before the meeting, only the new defense class, and he was feeling sick again.
“Hey, lets go down to the room, and plan more for tomorrow,” He said to Theo quietly as they turned the corner towards their common room.
“Not much else to plan, is there?” Started Theo, but as he looked up at Harry’s face, he quickly finished with, “But yeah, let’s go down there.”
Harry nodded gratefully. As they crossed the common room, Harry was even more grateful. The tension in the room could’ve been cut. Most of the population of Slytherin students that weren’t still in class were grouped together all across the room. Even the designated older tutors, sat at the large tables by the fireplace weren’t doing homework, just looking around warily. The students all sat leaned in close with each other conversing in tones barely higher than whispers.
Harry looked straight ahead as he crossed the room, doing his best to avoid looking at anyone, but he still felt their eyes follow his as he walked. He swallowed hard, and raised his chin up slightly, hoping he didn’t look as anxious as he felt. Theo nudged him, and mumbled something about tea, and Harry nodded, glad to be alone for a moment. He continued towards the pillar in the corner of the room, fingers fumbling for the seam in the marble, avoiding eye contact with anyone. As the hidden door opened, he quickened his pace, stumbling down the spiral stairs until he fell heavily into his chair. He rested his head in his hands. His ears were ringing, and he could feel his heart slamming against his chest.
What if he messed it all up? What if he said the wrong thing? Or what if no one ended up on his side at all? He’d be a freak again. He was stupid he realized. Stupid to get this opportunity and throw it all away by making a grab at power. Why did he care about it anyways? He wasn’t here to plan for politics like they were, he should’ve just been glad to be here, away from the Dursleys. It was all going to go horribly wrong, he was just going to be beaten up again, except this time Dudley had magic, would be able to hurt him worse, no one was going to give him carefully planned out rules. So he could avoid it. Why should he get to decide his rules anyways? Everyone here knew better than him, had more experience, knew what was good for him. He should never have stepped up, should never have-
“Harry!”
Theo voice cut through his spiral. He lifted his head from his hands, blinking in the light. He was curled in a ball in the chair, looking up at Theo, who was standing before him, blocking his view of the lake.
“It’s all going to be okay Harry.”
Harry sat up, crossing his legs on the chair. He’d honestly forgotten Theo was following him.
Theo sighed heavily, and squished himself into the armchair beside Harry. They were sitting side by side now, Theo’s knee over his own as he sat cross legged too. There was two mugs of tea steaming on the desk.
“Wha-“
Theo cut him off. “It’s a lot Harry. I know it is. But it will be okay. I know you don’t have the best idea on how any of this works. I understand you are relying on what we say here, but I promise you. None of us would do this if it wasn’t going to have at least some measure of success.”
“But-“
“Let me finish Harry. I’ve been listening around. We are going to have support tomorrow. There are going to be people tat will side with us, with you, tomorrow.There are people that will abstain, just to see if you are worth siding with. And there will, of course, be people that will go against us. But that doesn’t matter. Look at me Harry.”
Harry turned his head to look at Theo, his chest still heaving slightly.
“I would not do this if it wasn’t going to work. If it makes you feel any better, if I didn’t think this would be a good move, I wouldn’t have done it. I would have stood back, and saved my own ass.”
Harry blinked slightly. He was suddenly all too aware of Theo sitting so close to him, nearly on top of him as they squeezed into the same seat. As he made to stand up, Theo pulled him back down.
“Take a deep breath.”
Almost mindlessly, Harry obeyed.
“Repeat after me. It is going to be okay.”
“It is going to be okay.” Harry’s throat was dry, and his voice cracked a little. Theo passed him the mug of tea, and waited until Harry took a sip.
“We will have support tomorrow.”
“We will have support tomorrow.”
Theo placed the mug back on the table, and let his head fall back, so he was looking at the ceiling.
He let out a sigh, and said, so quietly Harry could barely hear him, “And if we don’t, we will make it work anyways.”
“I just wish we didn’t have to do it so soon.” Said Harry, “I wish we could’ve waited a while, made some allies. I wish I had more time to learn.”
‘More time to learn how to be a normal person’, he finished the sentence in his head, knowing Theo would understand the spoken part of his sentence as politics, not his own issues.
“We didn’t have the time though.” Said Theo, “Draco saw to that. It was about the only thing he did right, and it is the only reason this isn’t comically easy.
“Yeah,” said Harry with a sigh.
They stared out the window in silence for a moment, watching the seaweed sway. Harry’s breathing had calmed down.
“Hello! Are we working on our big secret plans today instead of dinner? I ordered in for us-“
Zabini stopped short at the bottom of the stairway, holding a large tray of food.
“Oh- was I interrupting something?” He eyes flashed and he waggled his eyebrows suggestively.
Harry flushed red and Theo rolled his eyes as he wiggled himself free of the overcrowded chair and stood.
He leaned over and whispered something in Zabini’s ear as Zabini placed the food on the table.
Blythe had followed Zabini down the stairs, and she hopped up onto Harry’s chair, where he had suddenly realized how cold it was in the room without Theo beside him. He absentmindedly scratched behind her ears as she purred, and he asked her, “Where have you been?”
She curled up beside him, and he reached for a sandwich off the tray Zabini had brought down.
“You two missed dinner, so I thought I’d come find whatever scheming you guys were leaving me out of,” Said Zabini through a mouthful of food.
“Dinner’s only half over Blaise,” said Theo dryly as he too helped himself to a sandwich and pulled a book out of his bag.
“Ah well, now none of us have to get up again.” Said Zabini.