Actions

Work Header

Am I Better Now That I Can't Remember?

Summary:

Parker MacMillian IIIII is the Interim-Interim Commissioner of Blaseball. When the name "Parker MacMillian" appears in the library, he starts getting weird flashbacks to lives that aren't his own. What he doesn't know is that those are his lives, he was just forced to forget about them.

Parker MacMillian IIIII discovers that he's a clone. Painful, but he'll live. He should've guessed something like this was possible in blaseball.

What he doesn't expect, though, is to find out that the Boss is his mother. And she's the one who did this to him.

Notes:

So now that blaseball is officially over, I've decided to post all of my leftover WIPs that I never finished but got pretty far into or were really invested in the idea. Things that I always said I would finish but then I got busy or it had been too long since I last worked on it but now I can't since it's you know, over. So this is the first in a series what I'll call "the end times" amnesty or something. It'll all be (mostly) unedited stuff that I wrote from the fic and whatever (also unedited) discord messages I sent that inspired the piece worked in.

Once upon a time when all of the stuff with Parker was happening and it was becoming more and more clear that he was going to have a more narrative role in the story in the Season 20s, I got REALLY invested in the idea that Parker was the Boss's son. I made a LOT of head canons about it, all of them about how the Coin was in all honesty probably a terrible mom.

Then one day I came up with this hc about how all of the Parker's were clones of each other and the Coin was the direct reason as to why all Parker's clones were made since, as far as I am or was aware when I was writing this, he was pretty much the only one in prehistory that wasn't Megan. So I made a hc that she specifically designed Parker clones to make "better" versions of him that were better at blaseball and got rid of all his "undesirable" traits so that she could craft the perfect obedient intern to the commissioner. There was probably a lot more to this back in the day, but this is what I remember of it.

Hope you enjoy! And as is customary: Parker IIIII (and all versions of him) use he/him pronouns, Megan Ito used they/them pronouns, and the Boss/Coin uses she/her.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

When he started his job as the Intern-Interim Commissioner of Blaseball, he knew that he had only gotten the job because a great tragedy had found its way to the previous Commissioner. There was no avoiding it, it was all over the news, people asked him questions upon questions about the last guy. They had the same name, they looked similar enough, there was obviously a connection. But he wasn’t him. He was Parker MacMillian IIIII, that’s five I’s not four and no it isn’t supposed to be “V,” he’s quite sure he knows his own name. 

 

He did what he was told, answered the questions about the previous Commissioner’s percolation like he had been trained to in Commissioner’s orientation, and he didn’t ask questions. He just needed this job, he didn’t need to know anything else about the what, why, or when. That’s why he was the ideal candidate. He had all the qualities that the blaseball commissioner needed. And he was really looking for some quality in the field experience, even if he wasn’t actually on the field but was behind a desk, so he didn’t mind not being paid for his work. That’s why he was an intern. He was getting paid in experience.

 

(There was something wrong with that statement. He couldn’t figure out what, but who cared. He was just doing his job. Was he supposed to be discontented with his job? He didn’t get it. He loved his job, and he didn’t need to get paid in money because experience is just as good, if not better. But his head hurt whenever he thought about it too hard, so he tried not to think about it.)

 

Being the Intern-Interim Commissioner was hard work, and it seemed like the last Commissioner (who wasn’t him. He wasn’t the last commissioner. He is Parker MacMillian IIIII. He is different. He won’t break any of the rules like the last guy clearly did to get… let go.) really slacked off on work. Sure, he was a bit moody but that’s because he was 19 years old, that’s what 19 year olds do, and sure maybe he listened to a little too much MCR and wore a chain on his belt but that didn’t make him a bad employee Intern-Interim Commissioner, he was diligent! He signed every form that came his way, even if it got him into some sticky situations with HR (he shudders to think of the mix up with Scores Baserunner, the Boss had told him that it was ok because it was his first infraction, but chillingly told him that it was never to happen again, and that he shouldn’t worry because “We will handle this'') and he learned as much as was necessary about Blaseball itself, but nothing more. Yeah, tragedy happened, but what was a workplace without a little incident?

 

Being the Intern-Interim Commissioner of Blaseball wasn’t half bad. His quirks were tolerated because they were beloved by fans, and because they made for a great social media and brand representative. Like every good intern should aspire to be. And because he was being good, he was allowed to be creative with his uniform.

 

He doesn’t have very many friends, but that’s ok. He’s content to be alone with his work, only allowing himself to feel the slightest bit of sorrow when he’s lying alone in his bed and staring at the ceiling. 

 

He didn’t realize how sad it would be, watching- no, hearing about someone dying, he wasn’t really supposed to watch games when he was on the job but blasebot let him know when there was a tweetable event that he was supposed to notify their devoted fans and valued snackholders of. 

 

First flashback scene to Parker the original’s life of something with Megan from the end of the ORIGINAL blaseball and when the league was ending and dying happens when Parker is revealed in the library and has a panic attack about it probably

 

 

Parker scene from the start of blaseball with Megan trying to get him to be reasonable about the game, or at least stop being an asshole about it. Definitely mom telling him that he’s not good enough somehow.

 

 

Parker in the secret room, old documents that are classified, finds the parker Macmillan files about him being a clone and the experiments with cloning

 

He was just walking around the office building. The commissioner is very busy, there's lots of things he has to do, he has the second most important job in blaseball. He doesn't go poking his nose in places he's not supposed to be. he knows that a closed door isn't one that's supposed to be entered, unless it was the bathroom or had his name on it.

 

(He feels like he learned this from somewhere other than commissioner orientation. he cant quite put his finger on it. he feels like he's forgetting something but he gets a headache whenever he tries to think about it, it just feels fuzzy for some reason. he doesn't know that he learned this because his mother would yell at him when she caught him going into drawers and rooms that he "wasn't supposed to" be in, or for opening the fridge after meals)

 

(He doesn't know that it's been hardwired into his brain because he doesn't want to get hurt.)

 

But one day, there's an open door. is one that had never been opened before.

 

The door isn't labeled, but he's seen it around before. it just has a number next to it, like all the doors in the building. but he doesn't know what's in it. he guessed that it was a room he was just granted clearance to, otherwise it wouldn't be open.

 

He looks at the files and they're all about him. but not him , the Parkers before him.

 

Parker doesn't even KNOW what to do with all of it. And when he reads the first file he pales because oh fuck.

 

He's not supposed to be in here

 

He can feel it

 

He could get fired

 

(Internally he winces. He feels like there's something more to fear than getting fired. it feels like he's just been hit, he doesn't know why. or maybe like someone had told him he wasn't doing a great job, like he was being demeaned within an inch of his life. he can't fucking remember anything but even that is strange. there is nothing to remember. He knows that he is doing something that is not allowed, and that there will be big consequences for it. but getting fired is the only one he can think of.)

 

But it's about him, or a version of him, or someone who was unrelated to him

 

(They had to be related. He's iiiii. This parker doesn't even have numbers. He HAS to be related. even if the boss is telling him they aren't. or, she didn't tell him anything, but she dismissed all his questions anyways. maybe they're unrelated after all...)

 

He doesn't want to get in trouble.

 

He tells himself it'll just be that file.

 

But he reads.

 

And he reads.

 

And he reads and he gets to the end of the first file.

 

And suddenly, he remembers everything about the Coin. About the origins of himself and Blaseball.

 

That's his mother. And she FUCKED HIM UP.

 

And he never DID anything to her. 

 

The frenzy he went  into of just READING files, finding every single fucking flaw he's ever had, things that he liked about himself that SHE considered to be flaws, he's just remembering and remembering and remembering and god. Its happening so fast. he cant fucking breath theres so much information. He definitely has a fucking panic attack

 

The monitor finds him while they’re cleaning the vault and sees him freaking out on the floor with files just SCATTERED around him... and just.... knowing that something is wrong. They try to comfort him. They remember the original Parker. This one wasn’t supposed to find out. But maybe it was better that he did.

 

The two of them don’t make a decision for a long time. But they start thinking about what it would be like if there was no blaseball. For either of them. For everyone, maybe.

 

 

Flashback of Megan and Parker going to a drive in movie. The movie didn’t matter, just each other's company. It was fun, they drove him because his mother still doesn’t like them. It’s not romantic, it never will be, but if it ended up that way no one would be surprised. They just enjoy themselves. Parker doesn’t think about his mother at all, until she calls him. Megan asks what it’s about. He says it’s more information about blaseball. They say that he can’t possibly actually want to do it. He gets nervous, says that his mother only wanted what was best for him, and getting his foot in the door of the business side of things might be good. “Might be good, or might make your mother happy?” 

 

Silence. The movie ends. They start driving. Megan says they’re sorry, just worried about him. Parker says he knows. They have a heart to heart. They get to Parker’s house. Moment of not wanting to let go of each other. He says bye. Megan cries in the car, Parker tries not to cry as he walks to the door.

 

 

Semi centennial, something with mom and her calling him fail son, growing unrest with her.

 

 

More mom stuff, maybe a dream, maybe a clone dream about the vault

 

“You didn't have friends when you were a kid.” she looked at him from behind her desk, drilling 

 

(Memories whisper to him, things that he didn’t realize- couldn’t realize until he had died and been reborn four times over. Telling him “that's a lie, you had a very good friend that loved you very much and followed you to the ends of the earth”) 

 

“And the ones you did left you because they were jealous of your position as interim intern commissioner of blaseball” 

 

(“That's not true, they joined blaseball when you did to make sure you were safe”)

 

 

Accidental talk with Parker 1 when he’s released into blaseball, realizes that his mom (the coin) NEVER cared about him, one more intense flashback to dying and death

 

Something about the Coin having a kid because it makes her look good, because she can just use him for her own personal branding but then she realizes that she has to care for him and having a child ruined her body and she's viewed differently in the workplace now and she's just. angry. And she hates him because of it.

 

She never really cared about him. She might’ve when he was younger but then she realized that he had ruined her career and the way she's viewed in the business world so she is going to force him to be whatever she wants him to be because he will not ruin her image again. Blaseball was going to be her last ditch effort to save it and if putting him in it was how she was going to rehabilitate it then so be it. And Parker would’ve done anything just for her approval.

 

She never wanted a child. So it's understandable that every parker after she made think he was more and more distant from herself.

 

He talks to the original a lot, and he tells him everything he knows about the cloning experiment and the subsequent copies of himself. Parker II was the first copy. There were a lot of “mistakes.” He was a disastrous set of circumstances, he rebelled because he very quickly realized that he was a copy (that was an open secret) and also that she had tried to change things about him.

 

He asks about Megan. Who they were. Why they’re in all of his weird clone memories of his original self. Why they’re also in blaseball. Parker I tells him that Megan was the original clone, and “New” Megan replaced them. A “failed” experiment because all of their memories were the same and they were an identical version to the original, and nothing was changed about them. That wasn’t what the Coin wanted. She wanted to change Parker.

 

Prehistory ended up becoming defined by Parkers. Whenever the league went to shit, she just made a new Parker. she figured out how to create a copy of him, it's not hard. Mostly because she didn't know what to do with him. Anything before the “successful” version of him was classified. Parker MacMillian III became the Commissioner of Blaseball.

 

He asked why he let her do all of it if it hurt so much and if he knew that she was collecting data on him. Parker responds that he just wanted to be helpful. He just wanted to be a good son.

 

 

Few days later he's getting anxious. Knows he can’t keep EXISTING like this. GET A GRIP PARKER. Flashback to Megan and what they wanted him to be. Knowing that they wanted him to just be him and asking him to stand up for himself. Telling him that he doesn't need his mother's permission to do what he knows is right. He calms himself down, he’s crying, he knows it’s the end, he wants to make up for everything he’s done– or rather everything he hasn’t done. He’s desperate to help, begging the Microphone. He’s ready for action. Monitor sees him. He takes a breath, and speaks into the mic. “Hello I’m Parker MacMillian IIIII”

Notes:

Thank you for reading! I won't lie, I'm a bit sad I never finished this one, but it's ok because the project would've been too much for me comprehend and it would've been a much longer piece than I had intended. So better to let this one go I suppose!

Something that didn't make it in bc I couldn't figure out where to put it was a bunch of Monitor lore about how they used to babysit Parker 1 and every time there was a new Parker made the rest of the official blb "staff" had a Parker-less meeting about what this Parker knows and doesn't know and a debrief on what they're not supposed to talk about. It was yet another fucked up concept, but I thought was interesting "flavor"

Thank you of course to Caz who I crafted this story with in the first place, I couldn't have done any of this without them. If you're interested in me or more of my stuff I'm taketheringtolohac on tumblr! I kind of just hang these days but one day I'll be into something again.

If you enjoyed, consider leaving a kudos or a comment! I always love being appreciated :)

Series this work belongs to: