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Chapter Text

Chapter 50

When the sunlight filtered through the curtains and landed on Xiao Zhan’s closed eyelids, he groaned and attempted to turn over onto his back.

With a yelp, he abandoned the plan and hissed through his teeth while carefully pushing a hand down where it stung like all seven hells.

No, it definitely wasn’t one of his brightest moments the night before, when he passed out without cleaning up, crotch pressed to Yibo’s ass.

Now, two loads of dried cum and some errant lube were keeping them literally inseparable.

While Yibo was still softly snoring in front of him, Xiao Zhan took a deep breath and removed himself slowly and with a lot of suppressed whimpering from the sticky situation, seriously considering shaving off all his pubic hair.

He winced as soon as he took in the complete damage.

The bed was a mess; the sheets were crumpled and just as sticky and damp as he felt, and Yibo’s backside looked properly ravished.

It could be showered and washed off, but the damage to his neck couldn’t.

With a sigh, Xiao Zhan sank back into the pillows and scrubbed at his face and the light stubble on his chin. He was a responsible adult and had given his boyfriend a freaking hickey again, out where everyone could see. And not only that. This time there were unmistakable teeth marks, too.

Xiao Zhan blushed and couldn’t even look at it, and when he realized he was about to have breakfast with his parents, he turned an even deeper shade of red and hid his face in the pillows, trying to go back to sleep. Or vanish from existence.

A pitiful low whine made him resurface immediately though, and he sat up, heart suddenly feeling so full and soft and discomfort and embarrassment instantly forgotten and distant.

‘Good morning, baobei,’ he said roughly and reached out to brush Yibo’s messy hair out of his face. ‘How are you feeling?’

‘Awful,’ Yibo lamented and sniffled, pulling on Xiao Zhan’s heartstrings somewhat fiercely. He should have taken better care of his boy yesterday and not dozed off instantly.

‘Aiya, poor baobei, does it hurt somewhere?’ he asked soothingly, and got up with a groan, pulling the curtains open all the way and opening his window to let in some fresh air to cut through the sex smell within the room.

‘No, not really,’ Yibo muttered and rolled onto his belly, wriggling dramatically to the side of the bed. ‘Just sticky and I can smell myself,’ he complained with a displeased huff. ‘Need the toilet.’

Xiao Zhan unstripped the bed while Yibo was in the bathroom, doing his business and when the boy was done, he brushed his teeth and quickly showered himself, feeling considerably more human after.

‘Ge, what should I do about your mark?’ Yibo asked with a smirk and gingerly touched the hickey on his neck. At least, it didn’t seem to hurt, but Xiao Zhan still furrowed his brow in consternation, thinking of a way to cover it up properly.

‘Scarf?’ he asked doubtfully as he scanned the contents of his wardrobe, but Yibo shook his head next to him. ‘It’ll just be weird if I keep it on inside the cafe.’

‘Mn, true,’ Xiao Zhan nodded and pulled out an old, dark red turtleneck.

‘Try that on?’

He threw the top over to Yibo, who scrambled to catch it, a little clumsy and still sleepy. But Xiao Zhan swallowed the snarky remark. After the big day Yibo had, he was allowed to be a little out of it this morning.

‘Need a coffee,’ the boy muttered and got dressed.

Xiao Zhan followed along, choosing a dark green hoodie and blue jeans. A casual, comfortable fit for Sunday morning brunch.

‘It’s a bit loose, ge, but I think it’s fine,’ Yibo commented and did a little pirouette in front of the mirror. ‘Does it cover your love bite?’

‘Mn,’ Xiao Zhan hummed lazily, eyes going half-lidded, as he stepped up behind Yibo and admired the fit. Arousal sparked awake inside of him, and he took in how nicely the fabric hugged Yibo’s body. It was a little loose indeed, but Xiao Zhan hadn’t worn it in years and back then he was still lankier, so it wasn’t as obvious.

More obvious was the length of the fabric, covering Yibo’s thighs and almost looking like a mini dress. Maybe the fact that Yibo wasn’t wearing any pants yet helped the image form in Xiao Zhan’s head and he reached out to put his hands possessively on Yibo’s hips, making him jerk a little in surprise.

‘Gege!’ Yibo scolded him. ‘Not now! We have to go, or we’ll be late!’

‘…ah… Ha… Right,’ Xiao Zhan stuttered, reluctantly taking his hands away and ignoring his semi. He didn’t know where this extreme horniness came from. Usually, it was Yibo who had to deal with hormones and a higher than usual sex drive.

Ah well, he wasn’t really complaining, and Yibo sent him a small, secret smirk while pulling up some black, skinny jeans and fiddling with the zipper. ‘Wait until after and you can do me again.’

‘Oh, I’ll do you,’ Xiao Zhan replied heatedly and reached for Yibo’s hand. ‘Now, no more sex talk. Help me get my boner down.’

—

‘Wow, have you been online yet?’

Xiao Zhan shook his head and stopped at the red light. ‘No time. Is everything okay?’

‘Mn, I got a lot of new followers on Oasis and requests on Weibo… More people discovered our photos and they have been shared around again. I’m tagged in so many videos.’

‘Switch your phone off for now, baobei,’ Xiao Zhan suggested. Yibo was freaking a little, and he didn’t want him to get overwhelmed by all the attention. ‘We’ll look together later and figure out what to do with your accounts. Sound good?’

‘Yeah… yeah,’ Yibo replied and sighed deeply. ‘That’s a good idea.’

Originally, Xiao Zhan had planned to tell him about the lifestyle magazine journalist Da Peng and his offer, but decided to wait until later and until they had a proper look at the situation. Deep inside, he had known and expected that Yibo would have more eyes on him after the performance. There was just no way that someone with his talent would not garner attention. But he hadn’t thought about how to handle it.

They would have to figure it out together.

—

Yingyue had reserved them a cozy spot next to the window and when Xiao Zhan and Yibo entered the café, Xiao Yutong and Xiao Qianfan were already there, waving at them excitedly and pointing at the bench they had left empty.

Yibo slid into it somewhat gingerly, and Xiao Zhan suppressed a choke, praying that he wouldn’t look guilty as charged.

‘Good morning, sweethearts! I hope you had a good rest!’ Xiao Yutong exclaimed and pushed the menu towards Yibo, who nodded politely and smiled.

‘Mn, slept like a log,’ he said and craned his neck. ‘Is my boss here?’

‘She was here earlier and showed us to our seats,’ Xiao Yutong explained. ‘But they are awfully busy. She had to rush back immediately. It’s a very beautiful place.’

‘Zhan-ge designed the logo!’ Yibo said and puffed out his chest while pointing towards the unmissable sign on the wall and on the menu.

They proceeded to chat about how Yibo came to work at the Lotus Pond while they studied the menu and Xiao Zhan side-eyed his boyfriend from time to time, surprised and happy at the same time about how relaxed Yibo was with his parents.

When his father brought up yesterday’s routine, it became evident that it wasn’t the first time they talked about dancing. Yibo had mentioned in the past that his baba had recommended him songs to dance to, but the extent of their conversations was new to him.

It made him feel all warm and fuzzy inside and even a tad emotional, that his baba so actively took an interest in Yibo’s hobby, and the feelings multiplied once he took in Yibo’s shiny eyes and the way he talked animatedly with people he wasn’t overly familiar with.

Xiao Zhan caught his mama’s knowing gaze, smiled a little sheepishly to himself and shrugged.

‘Are you guys ready to order?’

Yingyue had appeared next to them and sat down on the bench next to Xiao Zhan, elbowing him playfully.

‘How does it feel to date a star, eh?’

Xiao Zhan snorted while Yibo made a dismissive noise next to him.

Well, you are MY star, flashed through Xiao Zhan’s mind and he pursed his lips to not blurt out the extremely cheesy love declaration. But he saved it for another time.

‘Aiya, don’t act shy!’ Yingyue continued and winked at Xiao Zhan’s parents. ‘Yibo is the talk of the town today!’

‘Well, he did steal the show yesterday,’ Xiao Yutong stated and looked around with a pleased smile on her face. Xiao Zhan wanted to roll his eyes and groan. As much as his mama liked to complain about Du Hua showing off her daughter and boasting… well, they weren’t related by blood but it certainly was a habit they both shared.

But now that Yingyue had pointed it out, he became aware of other café customers low-key watching them.

If he made himself a little taller, casually hiding Yibo, who was sitting next to the window, from view, that was most definitely valid. Yibo was unaware of the attention as he chewed on his bottom lip, deciding what to order.

‘I want to try the new Christmas coffees,’ Yibo announced. ‘Ge, do you want to try the cinnamon star latte and I’ll get the gingerbread cappuccino? Then we can share.’

‘Oh!’

Xiao Zhan’s eyes lit up. December was still almost a week away, but of course, some places started early and decorations had been up for a few weeks now. Hell, Xiao Zhan had looked up new cake and cookie recipes recently and taken his boxes with decorations out of the cellar.

The reindeer plushie Yibo had gifted him was already sitting on his couch and every time he looked at it in passing, it made him smile.

‘Let’s do that,’ he agreed eagerly, and nodded along.

They picked a serve of pancakes each, while Xiao Zhan’s parents decided to try some less fancy coffee and picked the special of the day, then lamented about missing out on Yibo’s barista skills.

‘Auntie, I’m mostly just working on Thursday night and sometimes Sundays. You have to try my coffee next time you’re here!’ Yibo said with a grin on his face. Xiao Qianfan hummed in agreement.

‘That might be sooner than later,’ he piped up and Xiao Zhan raised an eyebrow.

‘Ah?’

‘Well. Your father and I, we were thinking,’ Xiao Yutong took over and smiled serenely. ‘What’s the plan for Christmas this year?’

Xiao Zhan and Yibo shared a quick look and Xiao Zhan’s heart sank as he suddenly remembered that he hadn’t made any plans at all.

Usually, he would spend Christmas with his parents, had always done so, whether he had a boyfriend or not, whether he was still at university or lived at home, so it had completely slipped his mind to communicate about it.

Only this year… How could he forget to tell his parents?

He remained quiet, trying to find the right words to say and not offend anyone. His heart was torn.

‘Aiya, just tell him!’ Xiao Qianfan urged his wife and sighed deeply.

Yutong huffed but continued.

‘Well, we were thinking of coming over this year, if that doesn’t interfere with any of your plans. But we are pretty flexible,’ she said casually and shrugged.

A weight lifted immediately off Xiao Zhan’s shoulders, and he let out an internal sigh of relief, thankful for his mindful parents and glad that no feathers were ruffled. He would make sure to make this Christmas very special for all of them.

‘That would be nice,’ he replied genuinely, and faced Yibo. ‘If you’re alright with staying at home and having a quiet celebration?’

‘Mn, I’d like that,’ Yibo replied softly, gaze far away and Xiao Zhan let him be, but not before he squeezed his knee under the table.

The arrival of their food and coffees interrupted the conversation and Xiao Zhan realized how hungry he was when he saw the delicious tower of pancakes smothered in maple syrup, cream and strawberries in front of him. For the next few minutes, they heard nothing but the low buzz of talking clients and café equipment around them.

When Xiao Zhan noticed his mama throwing looks that became gradually more confused over his shoulder, he cocked his head questioningly.

‘What is it?’ he asked, when his mama kept up her odd behaviour and took a sip of the cinnamon star latte, which turned out to be delicious.

He was licking his lips and pushing the mug over to Yibo so he could have a try when his mama cleared her throat and adjusted her position on the bench.

She leaned over.

‘There are two men a few tables behind you. They are staring at you. It’s making me uncomfortable.’

Xiao Zhan turned around at the same time Yibo twisted his head to see what was happening and they both collectively choked down gasps at the image that was presented.

Xiao Zhan quickly took a big swig of coffee, trying to hide his …what was it? Shock? Surprise? Unpleasant surprise? He didn’t want to alert his mama, but Yibo, who had his cheeks full and looked like a very adorable and agitated chipmunk, made wide eyes.

Xiao Zhan delicately stepped on his foot under the table and gave him a quick, meaningful stare.

‘You know those gentlemen, ZhanZhan?’ Xiao Yutong asked, and Xiao Zhan felt her eyes drilling through him.

Squirming a little under her scrutinizing gaze, he cleared his throat and made a dismissive hand gesture.

‘Vaguely,’ he said, and effectively eased his mama’s worries.

Still, from time to time, and especially when his mama and baba were talking to each other, Xiao Zhan and Yibo found themselves sharing incredulous looks and at one point, Yibo looked like he wasn’t sure whether he wanted to laugh or cringe. Xiao Zhan felt similarly. He wanted to shake himself in horror and laugh hysterically at the situation.

When they said goodbye to Xiao Zhan’s parents, Yibo thanked them again profusely, almost stumbling over his words in his eagerness to let them know how much he appreciated their presence.

Xiao Zhan stood next to him, silently pleased and so fond of his little family.

His father promised to send the pictures through as soon as they were home and his mama refused to take him up on his offer to stay in the guestroom for Christmas, arguing that they had already put in a request with their current holiday home.

‘It is not for from where you are and we won’t be in your hair!’

Yibo shook his head fervently. ‘You’re not in our hair! And our house is big!’

He choked and blushed furiously. ‘I mean…’

Xiao Zhan looped an arm around his neck and pulled him in, feeling eyes at the back of his head and swallowing down the bitter taste coming with it. No, those two individuals would never ruin his day again. He wouldn’t let them.

Instead of the unwanted looks, he concentrated on Yibo’s warm body next to him, his so familiar smell and his red cheeks. The boy was flustered, but Xiao Zhan only squeezed his shoulder, heart so full and warm.

‘Right. Our house is big. You wouldn’t intrude,’ he said and felt Yibo’s shoulders relax again instantly.

His cheeks were still a little pink but now due to a different reason.

‘Well, thank you for the offer,’ Xiao Qianfan said and chuckled to himself. ‘But we might have already arranged our stay.’ He scratched his head sheepishly while muttering about how cozy and nice the holiday home was.

Xiao Zhan let this matter rest, but not the other one.

When his parents went ahead to start their hour-long drive home, he lingered, stacking up plates and cups for Cheng Xiao to collect later, and finally held out his hand to pull Yibo up from the bench.

‘Ge, you’re such a gentleman today,’ Yibo whispered suggestively and smoothed down his turtleneck.

Xiao Zhan winked, before lifting their interlaced fingers and placing a kiss on the back of Yibo’s hand.

‘I’ll be back in a moment, baobei.’

Then he turned around and watched Yinjun and Teemu both jerk simultaneously, caught red-handed. He didn’t know whether they talked about him. If they did, he was sure that nothing nice was being said. It didn’t bother him. What bothered him was their constant eyes on him. Hadn’t they moved on like he had?

‘You got anything to say to me? Ah? I’m right here,’ he asked as soon as he was within hearing distance and crossed his arms in front of his chest.

Teemu blushed pretty hard and lowered his gaze while Yinjun looked outraged and scrambled for words. Internally, Xiao Zhan was very satisfied. They had not expected him to call them out, but he was tired of letting them get away with their bullshit and needed to give them a piece of his mind.

‘Staring is rude. Mind your own business.’

He nodded politely to them both, a stark contrast to his icy demeanor and his hard eyes, and received nothing but awkward silence and flustered gaping in response.

Xiao Zhan turned around, looped an arm around Yibo’s waist and, together, they exited the café, never looking back, only ahead.

‘Ge, what the fuck?’ Yibo exclaimed as soon as they were sitting in the car, driving back home. He sounded amused as well as mortified, and Xiao Zhan found it very relatable.

‘I know, right?’ he chuckled. ‘How on earth did they find each other?’

He shook his head in slight disgust, then huffed out an incredulous laugh.

‘They’re both walking red flags,’ Yibo argued. ‘I didn’t know they would pull each other in.’

He shook himself exaggeratedly while Xiao Zhan nodded, chewing on his bottom lip.

‘Yeah, I am actually a little speechless. It’s wild.’

Yibo cackled madly.

‘You were out there ready to fight them both, though.’

Xiao Zhan raised a questioning eyebrow.

‘You don’t sound concerned, ah?’

Yibo shook his head and smirked like a gremlin.

‘No, you’re kinda hot when you’re angry, ge.’

Yibo squirmed around in his seat, giving him the side-eye.

‘So hot,’ he repeated and licked his lips exaggeratedly. ‘You wanted to do me again?’

Xiao Zhan didn’t exactly speed home- he was too mindful a driver- but he was definitely toeing the line.

Even though he wanted to do nothing more than pull Yibo’s pants down, ruck up that hot turtleneck and bend him over the kitchen counter, he made sure he confirmed whether he was really up for it.

‘We can do other things, hm?’ he suggested while taking off his shoes, eyes on Yibo’s ass, but the boy nodded stubbornly.

‘Want you inside again. Maybe I’m still loose from last night…’

‘Aiya…’

So in the end, Yibo found himself bent over the kitchen counter after all, on his tippytoes and ass up in the air while Xiao Zhan plowed into him. Contrary to his words, Yibo wasn’t ‘still loose’ but tight as usual. It didn’t deter them, though, as Xiao Zhan quickly rushed upstairs to get the lube.

He was getting familiar with opening up his boyfriend, with the way he stretched around his fingers, and was already learning what made him whine for more or moan in pleasure. Almost frighteningly fast.

They came almost at the same time, Xiao Zhan spilling deep inside Yibo and Yibo dripping over Xiao Zhan’s fingers and onto the kitchen tiles, mumbling gibberish and begging Xiao Zhan to please fill him up some more.

With his heart hammering in his chest. Xiao Zhan doubled over to rest his head on Yibo’s back, the fabric of the turtleneck warm and a little damp against his forehead.

Yibo was breathing heavily in front of him, shoulder heaving and slowly becoming boneless, trapped between Xiao Zhan’s body and the kitchen counter.

Before he could slip onto the floor, Xiao Zhan carefully removed himself, suppressing a groan and gathered Yibo up, bending his legs to lift him and carry upstairs, hand under his butt.

Yibo made an annoyed little noise against his collarbone and looped his arms around his neck, huffing against his bare skin.

This time, Xiao Zhan remained diligent and cleaned them both up properly, watching Yibo’s eyelids droop almost comically and smiling.

‘Wang Yibo is going to have a little midday nap now,’ he said and winked while manhandling Yibo under the blanket and pushing his piggy plush against his cheek.

He giggled at Yibo’s outraged expression and reached over to stroke his hair.

‘Ge, you can’t fuck me like that and then tuck me into bed with a plushie!’

‘I can and I just did, gouzaizai. Now sleep, you’re still exhausted, ah?’

Yibo grumbled, but in the end, he was too tired to argue, and Xiao Zhan watched until sleep claimed him not long after.

He remained next to him, stroking his hair, until his phone vibrated, and he quickly left the room, opening his messages.

[Wang Zhuocheng]: I dropped off your bamboo earlier. Please close the window the next time you decide to be INDECENT IN YOUR KITCHEN THE WHOLE NEIGHBOURHOOD NOW KNOWS THAT YOUR BOYFRIEND HAS A BREEDING KINK

Xiao Zhan choked, fumbled his phone and almost fell down the stairs, face heating up so quickly, he was glad he didn’t faint on the spot.

How would he be able to look his friend in the eyes the next time he saw him?!

After he had calmed down and got over his embarrassment, he used the free time to work on his artwork, making sure he had tucked it away safely before Yibo woke up.

When the boy did, they sat down to sort out Yibo’s social media situation.

His accounts were now so popular, Xiao Zhan suggested creating another Weibo profile he could use for dance and photography related content and keep his old account locked and private for close friends only. His Oasis only needed a little clean up before it looked quite professional and Yibo kept it that way.

When Xiao Zhan told him about the reporter who had approached him, Yibo perked up.

‘A feature about me in a magazine?’ he asked doubtfully and chewed on his bottom lip while playing absent-mindedly with Xiao Zhan’s fingers.

‘We can refuse it politely. If it’s something you’re not comfortable with. Absolutely no pressure. He said so too.’

‘He did?’ Yibo asked, still sounding contemplative. Xiao Zhan remained silent to give him time and space to mull the idea over.

‘I think I want to look at it,’ Yibo eventually admitted. ‘If they ask me about… about dancing only it might be good for Spotlight as well.’

Xiao Zhan raised an impressed eyebrow. ‘That’s very selfless of you, Wang Yibo.’

Yibo shrugged dismissively and interlaced their fingers on Xiao Zhan’s lap. ‘Not really. It’s beneficial for me too. But I don’t want to talk about anything private.’

‘Yeah, I understand,’ Xiao Zhan said. ‘We can ask for details and what exactly they are after.’

‘Mn.’

Yibo nodded seriously. ‘Can you help me compose an email?’

‘Sure thing.’

—

‘Zhan-ge, they’re home.’

The small, defeated statement made Xiao Zhan’s heart sink, and he glimpsed out of the bedroom window, standing behind the curtains in a perfect simulation of Madam Ling’s favourite pose.

The Wangs’ car was back in the driveway and he wasn’t sure how to feel about it.

But what he was sure about was Yibo needing his support right now, more than ever, so he pulled the boy in by his neatly done up tie and tilted his chin up for a tender kiss.

‘I love you, baobei. Anything you need, I’ve got you, alright? And I’m on constant call today too, even during work hours, alright?’

‘Mn.’ Yibo nodded in relief and licked across his lips. ‘Do you know how amazing you are, ge? Thank you. I love you so much!’

‘Love you more, gouzaizai.’

After Yibo had left for school, wearing a heap of concealer to hide the hickey that still hadn’t faded completely, Xiao Zhan pumped himself up and drove to the gym. He had been slacking recently but didn’t want all his good work to go to waste.

Yibo texted him during lunchtime and told him he would be back late as his parents wanted to take him out for dinner. Xiao Zhan had mixed feelings about it and snuck quick, nervous glances at his phone throughout the rest of the day, getting so distracted, he added another hour onto his work day because he didn’t feel like he had done enough.

But Yibo didn’t contact him anymore and the next message he got was the boy telling him they were leaving and he’d be home in a few minutes.

With a sigh, Xiao Zhan stored his artwork in progress in the laundry cupboard.

When Yibo shuffled through the front door only a little later, Xiao Zhan had just finished making tea but didn’t get to pour any because he was attacked by an armful of boy who pressed himself against his body like he wanted to vanish from existence. Yibo was trying to make himself small and Xiao Zhan petted his back in support, chest feeling uncomfortably tight.

His boyfriend was not okay and obviously distressed. As he had feared.

Pressing down the searing hot anger he felt at Yibo’s parents, Xiao Zhan took a deep breath and led Yibo to the couch, where they both sank down, so close together, Yibo was almost on his lap.

‘They’ll be gone again over Christmas,’ Yibo stated in a small and lost voice. ‘They’re going on a skiing holiday and said I can come if I want to, but… I really felt like they didn’t actually want me with them. It’s a couple’s retreat. They made sure they mentioned it. Several times. And also how very boring it would be for me.’

Yibo huffed and pushed his cheek against Xiao Zhan’s chest, demanding affection and receiving it in abundance.

‘Of course, I didn’t want to join, anyway. Maybe… maybe if I hadn’t met you. But now? No way!’

Xiao Zhan nodded his understanding. He knew Yibo wanted to stay home this year. With him. Ideally, he had wanted to spend Christmas with Xiao Zhan and his parents, but that was before he realized a few things.

‘Ge, they didn’t even ask me about the school festival! I told myself I won’t bring it up unless they ask. But… they just didn’t? They were all happy, gushy, ‘we missed you so much!’ but if they really did… Why are they leaving again in two weeks and why didn’t they ask me about my dance?’

Yibo’s hands were busy fiddling with the fabric of Xiao Zhan’s sweatpants, emanating nervous and distraught energy.

Xiao Zhan gently wrapped his hand around Yibo’s wrist and pulled his arm up, placing soothing kisses to the back of his hand, trying to remain calm, but feeling the raging storm within him get stronger the more Yibo talked.

‘I’m sorry, baobei,’ he said and hugged Yibo closer, feeling him melt against him. ‘If you want me to, I’ll have a talk to them. I don’t know… maybe it’s good to hear it from a third party.’

Yibo remained silent after his offer, humming to himself.

‘That’s kind of you, Xiao Zhan. But I think I’ll need to tell them about how I feel. I plan to. Just…’

‘Aiya, take your time! Whenever you’re ready, sweetheart,’ Xiao Zhan quickly interrupted him and stroked his soft cheek. ‘I didn’t mean to rush you.’

‘I know,’ Yibo said and gave him a small smile. ‘You want to help me. And I appreciate it.’

‘Anything you need, love.’

Yibo lifted his head and looked him in the eyes. He wasn’t crying, but Xiao Zhan could see the redness. Despite his sadness, Yibo smiled at him.

‘I only need you.’

Xiao Zhan let out a somewhat wet chuckle and rolled his eyes, his heart so full of tender love and devotion. ‘Now who’s sappy, ah?’ he joked and kissed the tip of Yibo’s nose.

Yibo giggled in response but stood his ground.

‘I mean it. I only want to be happy, and you make me happy. Remember when I said I’d like to know what home feels like?’

Xiao Zhan was momentarily speechless, choked up with too many emotions.

‘I do,’ he replied in a soft whisper and looked at Yibo with nothing but love in his eyes.

‘Well, I know now. And I never want to let go of you.’

Xiao Zhan sniffled, ready to burst into tears at Yibo’s words and genuine affection. He didn’t say anything for a long time, only took his boyfriend in, as if he wanted to burn the image into his brain. Remember this moment forever.

You’re hurting now, and I share your pain. But we know we’ll both be alright because we found each other.

Soulmates.

If none of them mentioned the fact that Yibo was staying at Xiao Zhan’s place, despite his parents returning, that was fine. Xiao Zhan had gotten so used to waking up next to his love, he didn’t think he would be able (and willing) to adjust again. He had gotten used to sleeping with a nightlight on and a warm body pressed to his side.

Yibo had found his home and wouldn’t let anyone take it from him.

Their lovemaking that night was extra sweet and tender and maybe Xiao Zhan cried a little after. That was between the two of them only.

—

In the end, Yibo’s parents didn’t urge him to return. They were around, somewhat, but apart from the occasional chat when they accidentally met outside, Xiao Zhan didn’t hear or see them. They were friendly and very unbothered. Xiao Zhan thought it was very odd that they didn’t try reaching out to Yibo more often, but when he expressed his feelings, Yibo only shrugged.

‘Out of sight, out of mind,’ was all he said and proceeded to beat Xiao Zhan at Mario Kart.

—

On the 1^st of December, Xiao Zhan was up very early. It was still dark outside when he opened his eyes, taking a deep breath and silently getting up, trying to keep his excitement down and not wake Yibo just yet.

The boy was still snoring softly, curled up on his side and facing him. He looked so soft and beautiful, more innocent in his sleep, with his features all relaxed and his long lashes resting delicately on his cheeks, lips slightly parted.

Before arousal could ignite inside of him, Xiao Zhan went to the bathroom and got ready for the day.

In the end, he was a little too enthusiastic while putting lights all over the railing of his porch, door open and Christmas music spilling out into the crispy cold winter air.

‘GEGE! TURN IT DOWN!’

‘Ah?’

Xiao Zhan stopped what he was doing, yellow Christmas lights hanging around his neck and squinting back inside, only to see …nothing.

‘I’m up here!!’ Yibo shouted and Xiao Zhan gasped before rushing down the few steps, almost stumbling over a snowman ornament and looking up to where Yibo was perched on the windowsill of the bedroom window, disgruntled pout visible, despite the distance.

‘WANG YIBO, GET INSIDE AGAIN IMMEDIATELY!!’ Xiao Zhan screamed, arms crossed in front of his chest and glaring, while his heart lurched in his chest. What if Yibo fell and broke his neck? That demon child…

‘I WILL AS SOON AS YOU TURN DOWN THE MUSIC AND STOP SINGING SO LOUDLY!’

‘I WASN’T SINGING LOUDLY; I WAS SINGING IN A NORMAL VOICE!’

‘I HAVE TO MENTALLY PREPARE FOR SCHOOL AND YOU WOKE ME UP TOO EARLY!’

‘CAN YOU BOYS PLEASE SHUT IT, THE CATS ARE GETTING ALL RILED UP AND IT’S NOT EVEN FEEDING TIME YET!’

The piercing voice from just across the road made both Xiao Zhan and Wang Yibo snap their mouths shut in sudden shock and they blinked at each other owlishly, one standing in the front garden in his house shoes with a garland of Christmas lights around his neck, the other just woken up, in a cow onesie, one leg outside the window, the other inside the bedroom.

‘Uhm…SORRY!’ Xiao Zhan screamed back and rushed up the porch and inside to turn down the music. Was it really so loud? He frowned. His mama would scold him harshly for being a public nuisance, and he felt the tips of his ears redden in shame when he shuffled back outside.

‘HOW IS SWEETPEA GOING?’ Yibo asked, but they didn’t hear Madam Ling’s enthusiastic answer clearly, as a deep, humming voice approached, accompanied by little excited yelps and howls. Xiao Zhan flinched as he realized the noises as Mister Cheng’s and his sausage dog’s rendition of Mariah Carey’s All I Want for Christmas.

Madam Ling’s cats took it as an invitation to start meowing more insistently for their breakfast, and soon enough, the road sounded like a proper circus.

Xiao Zhan urgently told Yibo that if he didn’t get his leg inside within the next second, he would not make them pancakes for breakfast and Yibo moved so quickly, he stumbled, before a loud bump and a squeak reached Xiao Zhan’s ears.

‘EVERYTHING ALRIGHT?’

‘I’M FINE!’

‘MERRY CHRISTMAS MR. XIAO, I LIKE YOUR NECKLACE!’

‘AH…THANK YOU MR. CHENG!’

—

[Xiao Zhan]: When are you home?

[Wang Yibo]: I just left a few hours ago! Do you miss me already, gege? 😊

[Xiao Zhan]: I need to do something extremely important later. You have to join me.

[Wang Yibo]: ???

[Xiao Zhan]: Come home immediately after class.

Xiao Zhan rubbed his hands together enthusiastically and sighed, looking at his beautifully decorated living area. He had taken the morning off to finish his task and was extremely satisfied with how everything had turned out. The singing plush Christmas tree that Yibo had found at a garage sale really tied the room together and he fondly took in the various garlands, lights, and ornaments.

Yes, it was beginning to look a lot like Christmas!

In the afternoon, Xiao Zhan finished a commission he had been working on for a few days, feeling pumped up and motivated. He decided to use the burst of energy he felt and went for a run after, mindful to not trip over any tree roots, and returned just in time to catch Yibo skating towards his home.

He redoubled his effort and sprinted after him, whooping when he was in hearing distance and grabbing the yelping boy around the waist and twirling him around, laughing and eyes sparkling.

Yibo blinked up at him with wide eyes, a flush creeping across his features and he whispered a scandalized ‘gege’, before tilting his face up and receiving a wet and smacking kiss.

‘You’re so fiery,’ Yibo replied after they parted and put his hands flat against Xiao Zhan’s chest, where his heart was beating rapidly.

‘Mn, just happy to see you,’ Xiao Zhan said and couldn’t help the brilliant smile that made his eyes crinkle.

Yibo stumbled on his way to pick up his discarded skateboard and gave him a shifty glance.

‘December Xiao Zhan is really something else. Zhuocheng had a point!’

Once they had a shower, and Xiao Zhan made sure Yibo appreciated his work around the house properly, he coaxed the boy towards the car, making sure he was wearing a warm jacket, scarf and beanie.

‘This is our yearly tradition,’ he said conspiratorially and winked at the curious boy.

‘It’s not scary, is it?’ Yibo asked and shuffled around on the spot nervously.

‘It’s not. We’ll be outside, but it’s not fully dark yet and we’ll be on our way home before,’ Xiao Zhan reassured him but couldn’t help feeling a little guilty.

‘Is that okay with you? I’ll have a flashlight with me and won’t leave your side.’

‘Mn!’

Yibo nodded firmly and sat up straighter. ‘I don’t mind if it’s a little dark as long as you’re there. Don’t worry. But tell me if it’s scary! Where are you taking us?’

‘Just to the woods.’

‘THE WOODS?’

‘Aiya, relax! Just the outskirts…’

He parked the car on the side of the road, next to where he could already see a police van and a black range rover. Lulu and Ziyi were huddling close to each other, while Haikuan crouched on the ground and Zhuocheng stood next to him, his sour expression visible from afar.

‘See? Everyone is here! And the sun hasn’t even gone down yet. Alright?’

He petted Yibo’s hand encouragingly and watched the boy’s worried frown turn into one of curious fascination as he craned his neck and took in where they were exactly.

‘Oooooh!’

‘You figured it out?’

‘Yes! Are we stealing a Christmas tree?’

‘Aiyo, Wang Yibo!’ Xiao Zhan exclaimed with an offended huff and got out of the car. ‘We’re not stealing.’

‘But ge,’ Yibo argued, jogging next to him to keep up with his long strides. ‘Usually, you buy trees from a Christmas tree farm-’

‘Ah, none of that, none of that. We’re borrowing a tree and then next month we shall return it to the forest. No harm done, see? Ziyi, did you bring the axe? Where is Ji Li?’

‘He took Felix away on a cruise,’ Lulu explained and giggled. ‘As a …um… one week anniversary.’

Zhuocheng huffed, but when Xiao Zhan looked at him, he averted his gaze, ears red.

That’s when Xiao Zhan remembered his friend’s message and he flushed an equal red, looking away quickly and eyes falling onto Haikuan.

‘What are you doing?’

‘Regretting,’ Haikuan sighed and stood up with a long-suffering sigh. ‘I want to affirm that I am here only as a spectator and will take no part in what you are about to do.’

‘Oh please,’ Ziyi said and rolled her eyes. ‘We’re not hurting anyone.’

‘You’re hurting the trees.’

‘No, we’re making them fancy. They love it,’ Lulu piped up and Yibo cackled like a gremlin from where he was huddling close to Xiao Zhan.

A quick glance showed he wasn’t nervous at all, but shivering slightly.

‘Aiyo,’ Xiao Zhan immediately exclaimed and squeezed the boy’s hand, a concerned frown on his face. ‘Are you cold?’

Yibo was all bundled up and wearing a scarf and beanie at the same time. Maybe Xiao Zhan should have insisted on gloves too. He didn’t think it was that cold yet, but then he easily overheated and Yibo tended to run a little colder than him.

‘Mn, a little. But it’ll be fine when we start moving,’ Yibo calmed him down and entwined their fingers.

‘You can warm me up,’ Yibo whispered, while the girls and Haikuan were already on their way into the woods. Zhuocheng, though, heard and made something like a gagging noise before pulling Yibo’s ear and slapping Xiao Zhan’s head.

‘I’ve wanted to do that since last Sunday!’ he confirmed and stomped off after his friends. ‘Now we’re even!’

‘Ouch,’ Yibo complained and sulkily rubbed at his ear. ‘What was that for?’

‘Ah…’

Xiao Zhan squirmed under Yibo’s attentive gaze and scratched his head, laughing weakly.

‘We might have traumatized him last Sunday…’

‘How…? Oh!’

Yibo’s eyebrows rose when realization hit, but instead of a blush, a small, gremlin smirk appeared on his face and he chuckled mischievously.

Now Xiao Zhan was the one caught off guard. He tucked Yibo’s reaction away to analyze later.

They walked for a little while, looking left and right for the perfect tree, while Haikuan grumbled about not expecting this from a police officer and Zhuocheng blatantly ignoring him. Xiao Zhan hummed happily while holding Yibo’s hand and swinging their arms back and forth.

Every year, Haikuan complained, and every year, he joined them.

After Lulu and Ziyi, as well as Zhuocheng, had found and chopped down their trees, Xiao Zhan was still squinting into the forest, unsure. Nothing had really resonated with him and he was going to ask Yibo for his opinion, only to realize that the boy had stopped walking and cocked his head at… a pitiful excuse for a Christmas tree. It was very lopsided, just a little smaller than Yibo and stood sadly on its own next to a fallen down branch.

Xiao Zhan was about to scoff, but when Yibo turned big puppy eyes towards him, he knew that this imperfect tree was theirs.

He ignored his friends’ jokes and asked Ziyi to cut it down for him.

The good thing was that he didn’t have to wait for Zhuocheng to drive it home for them, but squeezed it into his own car.

‘Make sure to shake them all out properly!’ Haikuan urged them. ‘We don’t want a repeat of last year’s squirrel incident….’

Zhuocheng shook himself as he remembered, and Yibo gave Xiao Zhan a questioning look.

‘Ah, that’s a story for another time, baobei,’ Xiao Zhan told him with a fond chuckle, remembering the chaos.

‘We should catch up soon!’ Lulu said and nudged him with her elbow. ‘A lot has happened!’

She wiggled her eyebrows meaningfully and grinned at Yibo. ‘I’m sure it’s no different for you.’

‘Mn, yeah,’ Yibo confirmed. ‘It’s a lot. I’ll be in a magazine!’

‘Oooooooh!’

Lulu clapped her hands together in excitement. ‘Let’s DEFINITELY catch up soon!’

Darkness had by now fallen upon them, and Yibo inched closer, tugging on Xiao Zhan’s jacket sleeve.

‘We should bring our tree home, ge.’

And ourselves.

‘Yeah, it’s time. And you have school tomorrow.’

They immediately got to work setting up their Christmas tree, listening to Xiao Zhan’s favourite holiday music and drinking hot cocoa with marshmallows.

Yibo had never decorated a Christmas tree before, as his family only used a small plastic one, and he was extremely enthusiastic.

After watching him for a while, his own smile getting bigger and bigger, mirroring his heart, Xiao Zhan sat down on the couch and just observed his boyfriend carefully pick up bulbs and little wooden ornaments and frowning in concentration as he looked for the perfect place for them.

The unfortunate little tree looked a lot more vibrant than before, still a little crooked and leaning to the left, but now he was adorned with lights, tinsel, and ornaments.

A lot of tinsel.

Xiao Zhan’s grin froze, and he frowned.

‘Go easy on the tinsel, baobei.’

‘Ah?’

‘Too much tinsel!’

‘It’s pretty,’ Yibo pouted but took a few strands off again, giving Xiao Zhan the side-eye.

‘Good boy,’ Xiao Zhan praised him. ‘It looks gorgeous! Do you want to put the star on top?’

He handed Yibo an old tree topper that had seen better days. The gold coat had lost its shine years ago, but still, Xiao Zhan was fond of it. It had belonged to his nanna, after all, and would always be beautiful. And somehow, it fit the tree perfectly. Both were imperfect, but well loved.

Yibo stepped back once the star was in place and admired his handiwork, a smug and pleased smile on his face that turned into something infinitely softer when Xiao Zhan wrapped an arm around his shoulder and placed a kiss on his glowing cheek.

They spent a wonderfully relaxed evening on the couch watching ‘Love Actually’ and enjoying each other’s company.

Xiao Zhan was the happiest he’d ever been.

And so, December passed.

Xiao Zhan felt, for the first time in his life, that he had well and truly settled. He was content with himself, still actively working on not pushing himself too far and cut himself some slack, but every morning, he woke up and looked at himself in the mirror, liking what he saw.

Being content with his relationship was an understatement. He was still over the moon, truly and desperately in love with Yibo and knew that his feelings were returned with the same passion and honesty.

They had gotten used to cohabitating quickly and without major hiccups. Xiao Zhan knew that Yibo was a very tidy person and didn’t like clutter, but he wasn’t aware of the boy’s fright of insects and little critters. The first time, Yibo had yelped in horror, Xiao Zhan ran up the stairs in a frenzy, only to find the boy standing on the toilet seat, pointing at a tiny spider in the corner.

Xiao Zhan had laughed, kissed the disgruntled boy on the nose, and taken the lost spider outside.

‘Don’t spray or kill them, sweetheart,’ he had requested. ‘Just call me and I’ll save you.’

He found out more about Yibo’s interests; the tv shows he liked, the brands of clothes he bought, the sports he adored, next to dancing and skateboarding and became aware of many more tiny quirks he didn’t see before.

It was endearing, really. The way Yibo folded his clothes was exactly the same way every time, so different from how Xiao Zhan did it. Or how he tied a neat bowtie. Xiao Zhan saw all of those things, and he smiled.

Yibo made him smile a lot, and his joy was visible to everyone around him.

‘If I didn’t know it’s impossible for you, I’d start thinking you’re pregnant, with the way you’re glowing,’ Lulu commented and winked, after giving him a hug and sliding into the booth opposite him.

Xiao Zhan snorted and rolled his eyes, but still, he couldn’t and didn’t want to hide how happy he was.

‘Yeah, well… I feel really blessed, recently…’

‘You deserve to be so happy. And you deserve to have found your person,’ Lulu said once again and leaned back with a small, secret smile on her face, making space for Ziyi next to her.

Yibo came back from the bathroom only a moment later, looking like a soft, precious angel today in his light pink sweater and winged eyeliner he had gotten really good at applying.

As soon as the boy sat down, Xiao Zhan reached out to stroke his back, unable to keep his hands away, even in front of his friends.

They had gotten together to have hot pot this Friday night, just the four of them, and Xiao Zhan had a feeling that Lulu had some big news to share with the way she was silently buzzing and shuffling in her seat.

‘So, you received offers as well?’ she asked Yibo, who eyed the different broths doubtfully and, in the end, dropped his piece of chicken breast into the mildest one.

‘Mn,’ the boy nodded, eyes downcast, and deciding what else to pick after.

During the first two weeks after the school festival, Yibo had gotten more requests for interviews and features, offers to perform at birthday parties and events and take part in competitions. It was too much too early and as soon as Yibo became stressed with the constant attention, Xiao Zhan helped him put an end to it, stating on his new social media account he would concentrate on school for now.

Of course, he did not forget to thank everyone for their support and attention and let people know to follow his account for news and updates. Yibo was happy with the idea of uploading photos or dances now and then, but agreed to let it rest until after the Christmas holidays.

‘Zhan-ge, you’re the best social media manager!’ Yibo had exclaimed while lounging on the couch on his tummy and fiddling with the cute reindeer plush. ‘Do I need to pay you a fee?’

‘I have an idea how you can pay me,’ Xiao Zhan had replied suggestively, thrown the phone away and slowly stalked towards his boyfriend. They were naked within moments and the reindeer plush lay forgotten on the carpet, looking like he was averting his gaze.

Astoundingly, the interest also came from overseas. One cloudy afternoon, Yibo came home with an arm full of envelopes and it turned out that he had received scholarship offers from overseas schools and universities.

Xiao Zhan and Yibo looked at each other, stunned.

Then Yibo proceeded to pile them all up neatly and shoved them dismissively to the side. ‘That’s very generous,’ he said and squared his shoulders, before a small, soft smile quirked up the corners of his mouth. ‘I will make sure I thank them politely for their offers, like Zhan-ge showed me. Mn. But it’s not for me.’

Xiao Zhan nodded along, smiling in return.

He knew it was a huge opportunity. To gain experience in a different country and to be able to study for free had its own perks.

But he also fully knew that it wasn’t what Yibo wanted.

Maybe the Xiao Zhan from a few months ago would have urged Yibo to think it over. Would not have wanted to be the reason the boy decided against taking the offers and maybe even would have felt bad for ‘holding him back’. He would have doubted Yibo’s choice.

The current Xiao Zhan was sure of himself and sure of Yibo. He knew his heart, and he knew his partner’s. Yibo’s dreams were different. Yibo’s priorities were different too, and so were his own.

Yibo summed the situation up for Lulu, while Xiao Zhan hummed along, adding a few things here and there and munching on his food.

Eventually, he cooked a piece of beef in the medium spicy broth and put it on Yibo’s plate.

‘Try this one.’

Yibo frowned as he eyed the shiny red meat curiously. ‘Looks spicy.’

‘It’s only medium. And I’ve been putting spices in your food. Gradually,’ he explained and giggled when Yibo made wide eyes.

Ziyi huffed from across the table.

‘Gotta build up your spice tolerance if you want to keep up with the Xiao family.’

She winked at Yibo and put a piece of fried tofu in the very hot broth.

‘Betrayal,’ Yibo muttered, but picked up his chopsticks and took a tentative, tiny bite. Xiao Zhan almost aww-ed.

After chewing for a while, Yibo’s eyes widened again, and he puffed out a breath of air.

‘It’s spicy, but I don’t think I’m gonna die!’ he explained happily and ate the whole thing, looking at Xiao Zhan smugly.

Xiao Zhan swallowed the ‘told you so’ and kept cooking more vegetables for his boyfriend, while Lulu sighed happily.

‘You really didn’t want to go to those fancy schools overseas?’ she double-checked and Yibo shook his head, unbothered.

‘No, the last thing I want to do is move to a new place again.’ He shook himself. ‘Everything they offer I can do here as well.’

‘That’s very right,’ Lulu confirmed and pushed out her chest proudly. ‘I was thinking about offering you a sponsorship as well…’

‘You’re not a real school, Xuan Lu!’ Ziyi said in an exasperated voice, indicating that it wasn’t the first time they had the conversation. ‘The offers are from actual universities where you take classes and sit exams and get a degree.’

Lulu shrugged and waved her fiancée’s concerns away with a flick of her wrist.

‘Fine!’ she said firmly. ‘Then I’ll offer him a job.’

Ziyi gasped and so did Xiao Zhan, head jerking up and almost dropping a shrimp on his lap.

‘Cool. Mn.’ Yibo replied and nodded seriously.

‘Deal,’ Lulu shouted, and they both shook hands above the plate of quail eggs, leaving Ziyi and Xiao Zhan stunned and with their mouths open.

‘You still have to take some classes,’ Lulu said after and cleared her throat sheepishly. ‘But it’s possible to attend local schools and I’ll help you sign up for the proper ones.’

‘She’s grooming him,’ Ziyi whispered in Xiao Zhan’s direction but was ignored by the two excited dancers.

Xiao Zhan was not quite sure he was keeping up with the conversation.

‘So you are going to study after school?’ he asked Yibo and blinked in confusion.

‘Mn,’ Yibo replied calmly. ‘Need to get my teaching license.’

‘Wow.’

‘Mn.’

‘You just decided that?’

‘Mn.’

Yibo grinned happily while reaching for some extra coriander.

Xiao Zhan kept following his movements in silence for a few moments, until he felt warmth blossoming in his chest, enveloping his heart. He laughed softly and shook his head. Perfectly normal Yibo behaviour. With no hesitation, he seized the opportunity, knowing exactly what he wanted.

Xiao Zhan would be there for the ride and support him as much as possible, sure that Yibo would be an amazing dance instructor. The thought made his heart flutter even more and he couldn’t get the image of Yibo in front of a class of attentive young dancers who looked up to him out of his mind. It awakened something extremely soft but also extremely feral inside of him and he reached for his glass of watermelon juice, throat suddenly feeling dry.

Competence was so, so sexy.

‘And the other thing I wanted to tell you is that we have gotten offers too!’ Lulu told them happily. ‘From TV stations! Can you believe it? It’s still very early, and we only started negotiations… But if we get a TV deal, it would be huge!’

Xiao Zhan and Yibo both blinked and looked at each other, equally stunned. Xiao Zhan had expected Lulu to gain new members, maybe a few sponsorship deals, but a TV deal? He wasn’t sure how that would work out, but Lulu explained her wishes and ideas in detail over the course of their dinner.

‘Ge, I think I’m good with spices now. I’ll try the super-hot one!’ Yibo exclaimed, but before Xiao Zhan could utter a word of warning, the boy had already popped a flaming hot shrimp into his mouth.

After two glasses of water and wiping his face with a wet towel, Yibo’s eyes finally stopped watering and the low whines quieted together with the sniffles. Now, only Yibo’s face was red and Xiao Zhan quickly rushed him to the bathroom, where he fixed his ruined makeup, and told him it was okay.

He really wanted to laugh at his boyfriend’s bad decision but Yibo was obviously flustered and embarrassed, so Xiao Zhan bit the insides of his cheeks and concentrated on cheering him up.

On their way home, he petted the still disgruntled boy’s knee. ‘You’re so much better with spices already, gouzaizai. Don’t let this uh… mishap scare you off, ah?’

‘Mn,’ Yibo replied sulkily and took Xiao Zhan’s hand in both of his, playing with his fingers. He remained silent until they were almost back home, and he let go of Xiao Zhan’s hand again, huffing out an amused laugh.

‘Ge, I know you wanted to laugh soo badly! Your poor didi was suffering, and you were entertained!’

He huffed again and Xiao Zhan almost felt bad until he parked the car and saw that Yibo was holding back a smirk himself.

Sighing, he reached out and pulled Yibo against his side, placing a smacking kiss on his head.

‘It was very funny. I wish I had filmed it.’

Yibo slapped him and whined. ‘Stop! I really thought I could take it… How do you eat stuff like that? My tongue still feels numb!’

‘You’ll get used to it, believe me!’

Alas, during the early morning hours, Yibo came to regret his braveness.

Xiao Zhan woke up to the boy tossing and turning next to him, when the sun still hadn’t risen yet. Still sleep drunk and disoriented, he reached for his glasses in the semi-darkness and tried focusing blurry eyes on his boyfriend.

‘Yibo?’ he whispered and reached out to touch his forehead, sighing in relief when he didn’t feel hot to the touch. ‘What’s the matter, love? Bad dream?’

Yibo whined in response and threw his head back.

‘My tummy hurts,’ he complained and inched closer to Xiao Zhan, pressing his forehead against his upper arm.

‘Aiya, hopefully you didn’t eat any bad meat yesterday!’ Xiao Zhan expressed his concern while petting Yibo’s back gingerly. But then, he had eaten the same food and was unaffected.

‘It’s not that,’ Yibo mumbled against him and groaned, clutching at his stomach. ‘It’s the spices. I shouldn’t have had the hot stuff. My tummy can’t deal with it.’

‘Ah…’

Xiao Zhan almost winced. Yibo had mentioned several times that he wasn’t good at handling spices, but Xiao Zhan had been unaware of how badly it could affect him. Now he felt awful for urging Yibo to eat so much.

After a loud rumble that unmistakably came from Yibo’s belly region, the boy yelped and scrambled off the bed, quickly rushing towards the bathroom and throwing the door shut behind him.

When Yibo didn’t return after several minutes, Xiao Zhan became restless too and got up to check.

‘Yibo?’ he asked and had a hand on the door handle before he heard scrambling noises.

‘Don’t come in!’ Yibo shouted, sounding mortified. ‘I’m okay… I just… need more time. Fuck.’

He groaned again and Xiao Zhan heard more shuffling, then the toilet flush.

‘You sure you’re fine?’ he asked doubtfully, hand still hovering over the door handle.

‘Geeee,’ Yibo whined desperately. ‘Please go away! Stop standing there!’

‘But….’

If Yibo fainted or something, he wouldn’t know. He couldn’t just leave him when he was feeling so poorly!

‘No, ge, I’m on the toilet, ok??? Please leave!!’

‘Wang Yibo!!’ Xiao Zhan exclaimed and rolled his eyes, letting out a little huff. ‘How long have we been living together now, ah? There is really no need to be embarrassed!’

Yibo whimpered in response and Xiao Zhan almost barged in. ‘Are you okay??’

‘Xiao Zhan!!!! Can I PLEASE just have diarrhea in peace?? I won’t die. I am only paying for the spicy food I ate yesterday!’

‘Aiyaa…’

Xiao Zhan took a polite step back and cleared his throat.

‘You didn’t have to spell it out like that,’ he chided the boy and shuffled further away, a pout on his face. He was worried. That was all!

‘See?? Now you won’t find me sexy anymore!!’

‘Wang Yibo, don’t be ridiculous! I’ll leave you alone now and prepare some very plain congee and herbal tea!’

‘I’m not hungry!’

Xiao Zhan ignored him and walked down the stairs to the kitchen, muttering to himself and shaking his head. He didn’t know Yibo’s tummy was that sensitive or he wouldn’t have tried feeding him so much strong food. From now on, he’d be more careful. And maybe not up the spice level of his food like he originally had planned.

When he was standing in front of the stove, lazily stirring a pot of congee and wishing that Yibo would come down quickly to make his morning coffee, his phone vibrated on the table with an incoming call from Wang Zhuocheng.

Xiao Zhan squinted. It was Sunday morning. Zhuocheng wouldn’t be awake unless he was working, wouldn’t he?

He accepted and put his friend on speaker so he could continue preparing breakfast.

‘Good morning,’ he greeted him suspiciously. ‘Is everything alright?’

‘Uhm, well. Why wouldn’t…. Aiya, fuck it. No, I need some advice,’ Zhuocheng spluttered on the other end, sounding defensive and Xiao Zhan lifted a curious eyebrow.

‘I’m all ears.’

‘GEGE! My asshole HURTS and it’s your fault!’

Xiao Zhan choked and dropped the wooden spoon onto the kitchen floor the same time Zhuocheng let out a loud wail, followed by a string of curses.

Yibo stood in front of the fridge, wearing a bathrobe and smelling like the coconut and sandalwood body wash Xiao Zhan liked so much on him.

Alas, right now, he couldn’t enjoy it, as his brain was trying hard to reboot and explain to Zhuocheng what Yibo actually meant.

But his friend didn’t give him the chance and huffed in frustration. ‘I WON’T comment on this. Are you free this afternoon?’

‘Uh, yeah,’ Xiao Zhan replied, still feeling a little slow.

‘Good. I’ll come over then and explain. I’ll let you know when I leave, so there is NO REASON to be INDECENT AND THAT’S FOR YOU AS WELL, WANG YIBO!’

The call cut off after that and Xiao Zhan was left glaring at Yibo, who had put on his most innocent puppy eyes.

‘I didn’t know you were on the phone, ge,’ he argued in a small voice and tucked a strand of damp hair behind his ear. ‘Sorry.’

At first, Xiao Zhan wanted to lecture him some more, but then he took in Yibo’s pale and small face.

‘Are you feeling a little better?’ he asked and bent down to pick up his spoon, rinsing it in the sink and taking the congee off the stove.

Yibo only shrugged, looking quite bedraggled. ‘Not as bad anymore after… but I don’t know if I should eat anything yet.’

‘Sit down, I’ll make you a tea first and then we’ll see.’

‘Mn.’

Yibo nodded obediently, but hesitated. ‘I’ll make you your coffee first!’

After having his coffee and praising Yibo extensively for his barista skills, making him blush and roll his eyes, Xiao Zhan felt more human and he let out a little giggle when he thought about what poor Wang Zhuocheng had to listen to earlier.

Yibo cackled weakly too, but kept holding his tummy, drinking tea but not touching the food.

‘Still cramps?’ Xiao Zhan asked and sat down next to Yibo, putting his arm around his shoulders and leaning in for a quick peck on the cheek.

‘Mn,’ Yibo confirmed miserably. ‘But weaker.’

‘I’ll see if I find any painkillers. Do you want me to rub it?’

Yibo lowered his lashes demurely and nodded. ‘That would make me feel better,’ he said. ‘But don’t press too hard, please.’

Xiao Zhan suppressed a grin as he urged Yibo to lie down on the couch and switched on some Christmas music and the tree lights for the atmosphere.

‘I’ll be gentle, baobei.’

Zhuocheng came later that day, while Yibo was upstairs in bed, still feeling rather queasy, so Xiao Zhan had urged him to take it easy and maybe have a nap.

‘Jesus, did I accidentally arrive at the North pole? Are there elves hiding anywhere?’ Zhuocheng exclaimed as soon as he stepped foot in Xiao Zhan’s home, squinting at the wonky Christmas tree.

‘I think I have a few elves….’

Xiao Zhan was about to point them out, but Zhuocheng coughed and sat down on the couch, reaching for the plate of various different Christmas cookies Xiao Zhan had prepared for them earlier.

‘Tea or coffee?’

‘Coffee, if Yibo is making it, tea of you are.’

‘Wow,’ Xiao Zhan said flatly and narrowed his eyes at his straight-forward friend. He wasn’t that bad! Not as refined as Yibo, granted, but his coffees were very drinkable too!

He prepared a pot of green tea with honey.

‘Nice cookies,’ Zhuocheng complimented, and looked around the room. ‘Yibo not here?’

‘Mn, he is,’ Xiao Zhan replied. ‘But he has an upset tummy and is resting upstairs.’

‘Ah.’

‘So earlier, in the morning-’

‘I DON’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT.’

‘But….’

‘Listen, I already know more than enough, UNWILLINGLY, about your sex life!’

‘Aiya, it wasn’t about what you thought, that’s all!!’

Zhuocheng eyed him doubtfully, while sipping on his mug of tea, but dropped the topic.

‘So what was it you wanted to talk about?’ Xiao Zhan asked and leaned back into the cushions curiously.

‘Well, nothing serious,’ Zhuocheng stuttered and avoided eye-contact. ‘Just some relationship advice.’

‘Okay. As I said, I’m all ears. But I’m not sure how much help I can be.’

Zhuocheng snorted. ‘You’re way better than me with… stuff like that.’

Xiao Zhan lifted an eyebrow. ‘Am I not the oblivious one?’

‘Oh please, that’s just joking around,’ Zhuocheng scoffed. ‘You sometimes are, but that’s either because you’re not interested or because you’re overthinking. But you mostly read the room properly.’

Xiao Zhan chewed on that, unsure whether he should feel pleased or called out. He decided to just take it and turned his attention back to Zhuocheng, who was staring contemplatively into his tea, like it had all the answers to his obvious dilemma.

‘Okay, I’ll listen,’ Xiao Zhan said soothingly and put a spoonful of honey into his tea, stirring it gently and waiting for Zhuocheng to collect himself.

‘Well, as you know, Yingyue and I have been going out recently…’

Xiao Zhan nodded along, curious about where this was going.

‘And it’s been …good. We’re having a good time, talking, and hanging out…’ he continued, starting to sound a little frustrated. ‘But I don’t know. Does she just want to hang with a friend or are those dates? How can I tell the difference??’

‘Oh… Okay.’

Xiao Zhan’s eyebrows rose as he took in his mopey friend. Maybe he really was a lot better at reading people than he gave himself credit for. He didn’t have to ask Zhuocheng if he was interested in more than friendship; he knew. And he also knew that Yingyue had a big crush on him; she made it more than obvious.

He sipped on his tea for a while longer, thinking about how to help his friend.

‘So,’ he began after a while, prompting Zhuocheng to sit a little straighter, waiting for his words. ‘It can be a date if you want it to be. Nothing romantic needs to happen, especially if you’re still in the beginning. Often, a relationship starts out as a good friendship, so I wouldn’t be worried. As long as you’re enjoying yourself and having fun, you can go from there.’

‘Okay,’ Zhuocheng said and chewed on his bottom lip. ‘Yeah, I can see that. But how do I know if she likes me back? It may be a date for me, but maybe not for her? I can’t just ask her, can I?’

Well, you could…

Xiao Zhan didn’t say it, knowing full well how much courage it took. He could tell Zhuocheng that Yingyue liked him back, but would he believe his words? The man was naturally suspicious.

‘Well, did you flirt?’

Zhuocheng startled. ‘I don’t think so? We joked… But I’m a gentleman!’

‘Aha. So were there any… small accidental touches? Like brushing of hands, bumping of shoulders, looks that lasted longer than they should have, winks, giggles…?’

Zhuocheng remained silent, and then his face fell. He coughed delicately and shuffled around sheepishly.

‘Ah, yes, I do remember. There were. She…she did bump against me a lot and she had her hand on my arm while we were talking, and she was looking at me very intently…’

Xiao Zhan stared at his adorably oblivious friend and sighed internally.

‘Okay, so I would guess, based on that, that she was trying to be… uh physical with you.’

‘Aha.’

Zhuocheng flushed a deep pink.

‘But… I’m a gentleman! I can’t just… just…’

‘You don’t have to. You can take your time if it’s too fast.’

‘No, I WANT to!’

‘Then…’ Xiao Zhan frowned, at a loss.

‘But isn’t it too forward?’

‘No.’

‘…. No?’

Xiao Zhan chuckled and petted his friend’s knee.

‘She’s giving you the signals.’

‘So, I should act on it? Is that what she’s waiting for?’

‘Mn, pretty positive.’

‘ZHAN-GE!!!’

Xiao Zhan yelped and poured tea over his pants while Zhuocheng jerked on the spot, snapping his head towards the stairs, where Yibo was standing, hair mussy from sleep and wearing nothing but one of Xiao Zhan’s longshirts and fluffy UGG boots.

‘Yibao, what did I tell you about shouting out of nowhere? Ah?’ Xiao Zhan scolded him and gave him a stern glance while wiping at a wet spot on his sweatpants.

‘I’m sorry for shouting, but it’s your fault again!’ Yibo said sulkily and trudged into the kitchen, where he put the kettle back on.

‘Again? What have I done now?’ Xiao Zhan asked in exasperation.

‘You used my Ximalaya account again!’

‘Uh, I did. You shared it with me?’

Xiao Zhan was over the moon when Yibo casually mentioned that he had a discounted audiobook subscription and had started listening to all sorts of narrations while he was working. It soothed him and made the time pass more enjoyably. He didn’t know why Yibo suddenly had an issue with it.

‘I did, but I didn’t know you were listening to horror and murder stories!! Now my whole recommended section is full of it.’

He gave him a sulky look and poured himself a mug of tea. ‘Also, you didn’t close it and I had to listen to someone talking about haunted houses and ghost sightings. I almost fainted! It was so frightening!’

Zhuocheng choked on his tea and earned himself an elbow to the ribs.

‘I’m sorry I forgot to close it, baobei,’ Xiao Zhan said calmly and eyed his cranky boyfriend tenderly. Yibo didn’t have the best day today and became irritated easily. It was fine. It happened to everyone.

‘How is your tummy feeling? Would you like to try a Christmas cookie, or should I warm up some mild soup?’

Yibo grunted in response, but shuffled over with his tea and curled up next to Xiao Zhan.

‘Hallu, A-Cheng,’ he muttered, peeking around Xiao Zhan’s shoulder. ‘Zhan-ge and I we didn’t have sex this morning. I ate too much chili and had dia-’

‘WILL YOU SHUT UP FOR HEAVEN’S SAKE!!!’ Zhuocheng boomed and jumped up.

‘Let’s watch a movie, alright? I don’t want to talk or think about what you two get up to in the bedroom!’

Xiao Zhan perked up. ‘We’ll have to watch a Christmas movie, though. We’re only watching Christmas movies in this house in December!’

‘Yes, yes, I know,’ Zhuocheng sighed and made himself comfortable.

‘Yibo can pick, because he’s unwell today,’ Xiao Zhan offered generously and jumped up to switch off the music and grab the TV remote, getting into the festive spirit.

‘Oooh, let’s watch Die Hard then!’ Yibo announced happily and hugged a pillow to his tummy while reaching for a Christmas cookie.

The satisfied smile slipped off Xiao Zhan’s face and his eyelid twitched.

‘Ah?’

Maybe he had misheard.

‘He said we should watch Die Hard!’ Zhuocheng repeated, a shit-eating grin on his face.

Xiao Zhan pressed his lips together firmly and squeezed the TV remote in his hand.

‘I said, a Christmas movie,’ he repeated evenly. ‘Pick a Christmas movie, please, Yibo.’

‘Mn? But Die Hard is a Christmas movie?’

Yibo blinked at him, all innocent confusion, and Xiao Zhan narrowed his eyes at him. He couldn’t believe it! Yibo was one of those people!

‘Tell me,’ he began casually and strolled back towards the couch. ‘What makes it a Christmas movie?’

‘It’s on at Christmas!’

‘That doesn’t make it a Christmas movie!’

‘It’s LITERALLY ON TV ON CHRISTMAS DAY!’

‘Wang Yibo, there is no need to raise your voice!’

‘Xiao Zhan, there is no need to glare at me like I committed a crime!’

‘Oh Jesus, this is so much fun!’

Xiao Zhan and Wang Yibo collectively turned towards a happily grinning Zhuocheng, who was sipping on his tea while following the exchange.

‘This is no joking matter!’ Xiao Zhan snapped and huffed. ‘I see we are not going anywhere. We have to vote.’

‘Christmas movie!’ Yibo stated stubbornly.

‘NO Christmas movie!’ Xiao Zhan threw back just as firmly.

Wang Zhuocheng cleared his throat, eyes shifting from one of them to the other. ‘You want to hear my true feelings, huh?’

They both nodded, tense and expectant.

Zhuocheng paused for effect.

‘Christmas movie,’ he finally said and Yibo whooped while Xiao Zhan shook his head in disgust, fuming.

Muttering under his breath, he switched on the wretched not-Christmas movie, leaned back and crossed his arm in front of his chest.

A few minutes into the movie, there was a tentative tug on his jumper sleeve, and Yibo looked at him out of pitiful puppy eyes.

‘Aiya… I’m being bullied today,’ Xiao Zhan exclaimed, wrapped an arm around his boyfriend, placed a kiss on his head and pulled him against his side.

‘Love you,’ Yibo muttered.

‘Love you too,’ Xiao Zhan whispered back and nudged Yibo with his nose, making him giggle.

Next to them, Zhuocheng sighed.

‘Please keep it safe for work tonight, okay? I AM the police. I can still arrest you.’

—

Yibo recovered and December progressed without a hitch and quicker than Xiao Zhan liked it.

On some days, he wanted to rewind the clock and experience the last few days again. On others, he wanted to stop time to enjoy the moment a little longer. Being with Yibo, with his friends and doing what he loved had never felt so good, so refreshing.

But of course, it couldn’t last forever. Their little bubble of love and happiness was about to burst on this cloudy and grey Friday afternoon in the middle of the month.

Xiao Zhan had finished work and was staring out of the window doubtfully, frowning at the misty rain and wishing for snow.

Even his outside lights seemed to have lost a little of their shine and appeared rather sad.

With a sigh, he turned away from the window and decided to read on the couch to wind down and chase away the gloomy feeling in his guts.

Yibo was next door, saying goodbye to his parents who would leave for their holidays tomorrow, and Xiao Zhan wondered whether he was alright, wishing he had knocked off work earlier and joined him. Yibo had assured him it would be fine, and he would not be long, but the more time passed by without Yibo returning, the more anxious Xiao Zhan became.

He was about to put down his book and pick up his phone when the door opened forcefully and a distraught Yibo, in tears and with wide eyes, burst into the room, bringing the cool and slightly damp air with him.

‘Ge…gege…’ he choked out, before rushing and throwing himself into Xiao Zhan’s arms, crying pitifully against his chest.

Xiao Zhan almost automatically stroked his back, while his mind was still trying to process what was happening. Yibo was over to see his parents. Yibo was inconsolable. Something had happened. Just like last time.

With his lips pressed firmly together and cold gaze directed at the front door, Xiao Zhan petted Yibo’s hair and held him even closer, feeling hot anger deep inside of him. He was tired of Yibo coming home distressed because of his parents. He was tired of seeing him disappointed over and over again.

But for now, he held his boyfriend, helping him calm down.

When Yibo’s sobs became quieter and his shoulders stopped shaking so fiercely, he turned his blotchy face towards Xiao Zhan, swallowing heavily.

‘They… I told them how I felt. I told them everything. And… and they said to not be dramatic and ungrateful. Ge, they didn’t take me seriously at all! Baba didn’t even listen; I could see it.’

He sobbed again weakly and buried deeper against Xiao Zhan’s chest.

‘Mama found the mail I got from overseas. And she said I need to take the offer. It would be stupid not to and I would always regret it.’

Yibo turned desperate, tear-filled eyes up to him. ‘But I know I will regret it if I go. Ge, I don’t want to. Everything I want in life is here. I can’t leave when I finally found a place I belong. I just can’t, they can’t make me. They can’t!’

‘I know, I know, I know, baobei. It would be the last thing you want. I know. No one will make you go. You’re safe here. Don’t be scared.’

Xiao Zhan kept the reassurances going, until Yibo’s breath had evened out and he relaxed against him, sighing weakly.

‘I’m tired,’ he said pitifully. ‘So tired.’

The words, spoken in defeat, were what broke the camel’s back for Xiao Zhan.

He kissed his boyfriend passionately, putting all his love and support and affection into it and feeling it returned just as fiercely.

Then he leaned back, expression carefully controlled, even though the fire burned brightly within him.

‘I love you, Wang Yibo. I love you with all my heart. Please wait for me. I won’t be long.’

Yibo hesitated and looked at him for a long time. If he had any reservations at all, if he asked Xiao Zhan to stay, Xiao Zhan would. But Yibo knew something had got to give. It wasn’t Xiao Zhan’s place to speak for him, but it also wasn’t Xiao Zhan’s place to watch the love of his life get put down day after day. He couldn’t stand by when Yibo was suffering so much. They were a team, after all. And he had Yibo’s back.

After a while, Yibo nodded and took a deep, shaky breath.

‘Take care of yourself, Xiao Zhan. I love you.’

He made sure Yibo had everything he needed before he left and after a last look at the boy, who was wrapped comfortably in a soft blanket, Nintendo controller in hand, Xiao Zhan nodded, steeled his heart, and walked out of the front door.

The light of the Wang residence was on, illuminating the huge windows and making the big house look like some kind of medieval mansion. No holiday lights were hung up, no decorations lined the path towards the front door. It was bland and generic. Had always been. No wonder Yibo never felt like home. The house still looked like it had on the first day Xiao Zhan had been here. Nothing had changed.

He knocked on the door, nervous anticipation and fury an unpleasant mix in his guts, making him want to run away and kick the door in at the same time. He didn’t like feeling like that; it wasn’t usually like him to seek confrontations, but today, after everything that happened, he couldn’t see another way.

Yibo had tried, and it hadn’t sunk in. Now it was his turn. Maybe an outsider’s view would pierce through the wall of denial Yibo’s parents had built up. Maybe he could make them see. He had to tell himself to not rip them apart straight away and state his point calmly, even though he wanted nothing more than to scream and let them know how much they let Yibo down.

‘Xiao Zhan!’

Wang Huifen’s surprised voice and the door opening for him brought him out of his revelry and he straightened his back, thinking of Yibo and finding strength.

‘Come in!’ the woman greeted him. ‘Would you like a tea? Please sit d-’

‘No thank you, I’m alright,’ Xiao Zhan quickly declined the offer, voice firm and steady. He took in Huifen and Yichen, one standing in front of him, next to the kitchen counter, the other sitting at the dining table and finally, finally, he saw them. He registered Huifen’s fake smile and Yichen’s calm, pleasant but disinterested face.

The Wangs weren’t cruel people. At least not on purpose, he thought. But they treated their child like one of their hobbies or collectibles, which they looked at and polished from time to time, then put back on the shelf, moving on to other shiny things. When it broke, they took it to get mended and picked it back up when it was whole again.

Xiao Zhan had helped Yibo piece his cracked self back together, but he wouldn’t be returned to the shelf.

‘Do you know your son at all?’ Xiao Zhan blurted out, skipping past all empty pleasantries.

‘I don’t know… what you mean?’ Huifen replied, a confused frown on her face, and Xiao Zhan almost lost heart there and then. Yichen’s expression hadn’t even changed at all. He still regarded him with the same detached curiosity Xiao Zhan had thought was calmness.

They wouldn’t understand. But still, he had to try. Had to at least get across how Yibo felt. He decided to start with the most recent point of discussion.

‘Your son has been moving around all his life. The last thing he wants to do is uproot his life again, especially after he finally found a true home.’

He wanted it to sting, but the empty look in Wang Yichen’s eyes told him that his statement didn’t register as the stab it was.

‘Xiao Zhan,’ Wang Yichen said patiently, and Xiao Zhan almost cringed at his patronizing tone. ‘We are happy that Yibo found you, you know that. We always made it clear that we approve of your relationship despite the obvious age difference.’

Huifen nodded in agreement and took over. ‘But you must let him go so he can spread his wings. You can’t be selfish now.’

‘You know he’s young,’ Yichen continued. ‘This won’t last.’

Xiao Zhan stilled. The world came to a halt and all he could hear was his own racing heartbeat. He didn’t dare breathe. Once the world came into focus again, he started laughing. His only options were that or burst into tears. He was too shocked to form a coherent thought right now. How could the Wangs be so incredibly, mind-numbingly wrong?

They didn’t know their son. Didn’t bother to get to know him or they wouldn’t have uttered those condemning words. As if Xiao Zhan was just a fling for him, a crush that would pass. They weren’t aware of the deep connection they had formed. The true love and bond between them. Were oblivious to everything they had gone through together.

They didn’t know how fiercely loyal, how sure of his feelings Yibo was.

Once Xiao Zhan got himself under control again, his face became serious again. The anger and frustration were still there, simmering within him, not having diminished even a little.

‘Your son has spread his wings already. You just haven’t been paying attention.’

There were so many more things on the tip of his tongue, waiting to spill out into the open. But what was the point? Xiao Zhan knew their relationship would last. He knew his own heart, and he knew Yibo’s. Why should he spend his time trying to convince someone who obviously didn’t want to listen and had already made up their mind? His words wouldn’t sink in. Huifen and Yichen would nod and humour him, just like they had done with Yibo, but they wouldn’t reflect.

‘We have our lives too, Xiao Zhan,’ Yichen explained, acting like he was talking to an extremely unreasonable child. ‘We always made sure Yibo lacked nothing.’

Xiao Zhan was at a loss for words.

Huifen nodded in agreement with her husband.

‘Yibo had a good education, food in his belly and everything he needed. He had all the toys he could ask for and we paid for his dancing classes.’

She straightened her back and raised an eyebrow, as if she had just won a point against Xiao Zhan, who was still utterly speechless.

All they talked about were materialistic and shallow matters, completely disregarding the significant aspects of love, support, care, and attention.

‘When was the last time you watched him dance or asked him about his hopes and dreams? When did you last call him from overseas and asked him how his day was? What he had for dinner or whether he learned anything new? When was the last time you just listened to him? Have you listened to him just then? Really listened?’

Xiao Zhan ended his little speech with a huff, staring intently at Huifen and Yichen. But they both remained silent.

‘When did you last ask him if he was alright?’

The silence still stretched ominously. Both Wangs were now avoiding his gaze. Even Yichen seemed a little uncomfortable, and Xiao Zhan sighed deeply, suddenly feeling bone-weary. His heart felt heavy, and he wanted nothing more than to hold Yibo, to be held by Yibo. But there were still things left unsaid.

‘You will lose touch with your son if you don’t start showing some interest in him and his life. If you don’t start showing that you care for him and make an effort to be there for him.’

‘Yibo has people around him now who care deeply and show him what it’s like to be cherished for who he is. He is old enough to make his own decisions, and has been making them for a while now because he didn’t have the support, parents who guided him and held his hand when he needed it. And I think you know.’

Xiao Zhan remembered Huifen’s tears clearly. Remembered her screaming about being a terrible mom. Back then, he thought she was genuinely upset about Yibo, but in the end, she was only sad about herself. Xiao Zhan had sent Yibo to comfort her when it should have been the other way round.

He was all out of words now.

‘I will leave now,’ he announced, not wanting to stay a moment longer than he had to. ‘You can choose to think about your son’s words and feelings. You can decide to do better and be a part of Yibo’s life. Or not. Your son is generous and has a big heart. The decision is up to you. But don’t wait too long or he might just spread his wings wider and fly away, leaving you behind.’

Huifen laughed as soon as Xiao Zhan was done talking, and he flinched. It was an ugly sound that rattled him to his core.

‘How naïve are you, Xiao Zhan?’ she asked, all the smiles and put on persona slipping off her face, leaving behind nothing but coldness and something scarily close to disgust. ‘Do you think everyone wants to be a parent? Do you think it’s that easy?’

Xiao Zhan took a step back, perplexed. An uncomfortable icy shiver ran down his spine and he swallowed heavily.

‘You chose parenthood,’ he said roughly, simple as that. Of course, no one should stop living once they became parents. Life went on, just different from before. If you had a child, you were responsible for their well-being. Xiao Zhan didn’t need to spell it out for the Wangs.

But Huifen only snorted and rolled her eyes.

‘We didn’t choose. It was an accident! And sometimes… sometimes…-’

‘Huifen!’

Wang Yichen’s voice cracked like a whip through the room, making Xiao Zhan jump on the spot, shaking his head and trying to process what he had just heard. What Huifen said… what she was about to say… no. Xiao Zhan squeezed his eyes shut, not even wanting to go there.

An accident. Yibo wasn’t planned. They never wanted him. She regretted…

Unwanted… cast aside…

No, Xiao Zhan had to leave. He had to get out of here before he suffocated, chest tight and feeling dizzy.

He turned around on the spot and left. No one called him back.

Xiao Zhan would not, could not, tell Yibo what Huifen had said in the end. Wouldn’t want to cause him the pain. Wang Yibo would not grow old knowing that his parents resented him for being born. 

But when he was back inside his own home, heart hurting so much, one look into Yibo’s deep and pained eyes showed him he knew. Yibo knew and Xiao Zhan didn’t know how. Maybe he overheard them, maybe it was something he had always known, deep inside.

His heart broke a thousand times over and tears blurred his vision when he rushed towards his boyfriend, crushing him to his chest and crying bitter tears, for his boy, for the young Yibo, for the current Yibo and the future Yibo who wouldn’t have his parents by his side to watch him grow and flourish and be proud of what he would achieve.

With fierce and stubborn love in his heart, Xiao Zhan promised himself that he would show Yibo every day how precious and loved and important he was. He would heal and know only love and support from now on. It was never too late to start over. Never too late.

Several times, he tried to talk, but the lump in his throat wouldn’t go away and left him breathless, so they continued clinging to each other, finding comfort in each other’s arms.

‘Ge, I’m sorry you had to go through this,’ Yibo whispered eventually, voice all raw from crying, and Xiao Zhan immediately squeezed him tighter.

‘Don’t you dare apologize for anything, baobei…’

Yibo swallowed heavily and sniffled. ‘Thank you for standing up for me.’

‘Always, my love.’

‘Ge, can we not talk anymore today? I just… I just want to…’

Yibo struggled to express himself, but Xiao Zhan understood without words. Yibo wanted to move on, had already decided to move on before he poured his heart out to his parents in one last attempt to mend their relationship. There was nothing left to say, nothing left to do.

With a heavy heart and stinging eyes, Xiao Zhan kissed Yibo tenderly, feeling new tears run down his cheeks.

Yibo reached out to wipe them away gently, smiling at him bravely and oh, Xiao Zhan didn’t know he could fall in love even more.

‘Don’t cry anymore, Xiao Zhan. You’ve done everything you could. I will be fine because of you. Now we must live.’

Xiao Zhan sniffled wetly, heart so soft and raw.

‘I thought you didn’t want to talk anymore,’ he whispered and watched Yibo’s lips curl into a small smile. He wiped his face, then jumped off the couch and pulled Xiao Zhan towards the bedroom.

For the rest of the night, they let only their bodies talk.

Yibo was loud. Louder than normal, but Xiao Zhan couldn’t find it in him to tell him off, as he fucked deeper into his body, holding him up by his waist, fingers digging deep into skin and feverish eyes locked on Yibo’s long neck. Yibo had his head thrown back in ecstasy, mouth open and moaning loudly and wantonly, as Xiao Zhan’s balls slapped against his ass, their sweat-soaked bodies rubbing against each other. It was filthy and raw and so utterly intoxicating.

Opening Yibo up had become one of his favourite things to do. Getting him ready for his cock and teasing him with maddening brushes to his prostate was addictive and so, so hot. Nothing got him hard more quickly.

Yibo took him beautifully by now, and nothing was more satisfying than watching Yibo figure out what he liked. Maybe only Yibo figuring out and learning what Xiao Zhan liked in return.

Xiao Zhan angled his thrusts, now hitting Yibo’s prostate head on, pummelling into him and eating up the way Yibo’s eyes widened and his back arched off the mattress as desperate and loud moans escaped his lips.

‘Yeah, let me hear you,’ Xiao Zhan whispered roughly and tugged on Yibo’s hard length, bumping against his tummy and wet with pre-cum.

Yibo jerked at the touch and Xiao Zhan felt him twitch around him. Yibo needed less and less direct stimulation to his cock to cum and it made him very excited. Only a few frantic strokes, coupled with Xiao Zhan snapping his hips forward relentlessly, made him let out a low, guttural moan and he started shooting heavily all over his own chest.

Xiao Zhan had been holding on by a thread, trying to keep orgasm at bay, but the moment Yibo’s hole started twitching and fluttering around him it became too much and he came hard, choking on his own breath and eyes rolling back in his head, holding onto Yibo’s hips for dear life until the storm had passed and he fell to the side like a rock, not even registering Yibo’s offended whine at pulling out so quickly.

Yibo liked it when Xiao Zhan stayed inside of him for a while after they came. He argued he liked the feeling of being ‘all full of his gege’s cum’ and wanted it to last.

Xiao Zhan humoured him, silently pleased. He enjoyed the feeling of getting soft inside of his boy and cradling him close, kissing and holding him after he had ruined him. Often, it made him hard again, and they went for a second round, sometimes sweet and slow, sometimes hard and filthy.

Tonight, there would be no second round, as Xiao Zhan tried catching his breath, chest heaving and skin all tingly and sticky. He could hardly lift his arm to paw at Yibo, who was still on his back, legs spread wide and whimpering in a pitiful voice.

‘Am leaking, gege,’ he mourned, and Xiao Zhan turned onto his side with a low groan, arms and legs feeling like wet noodles.

‘Let gege help, ah?’ he offered and reached between the boy’s legs, where he was still loose and wet.

Yibo sighed at the touch and let his head loll to the side, a goofy, ecstatic smile on his face.

‘Again, baobei?’ Xiao Zhan joked and brushed a thumb along Yibo’s softening cock, prompting him to hum in satisfaction.

‘Maybe later?’

‘Maybe later’ turned into ‘sooner’ and a second round after all, as Xiao Zhan pressed him against the shower tiles, fucking him in quick little thrusts, while the hot water splashed against their backs. He didn’t know where the second bout of stamina and horniness came from, but was sure he’d regret it in the morning. For now, Yibo’s writhing, wet body in front of him was all that mattered.

He reached orgasm before Yibo, toes curling and doubling over, latching on to the boy’s back and sucking a mark into the unblemished skin, muffling his moans.

After, he pulled out, gently this time, went on his knees in front of Yibo and sucked him to completion.

They both fell into bed together exhausted, limbs all entangled and wet hair dampening the pillows.

—

In the morning, the Wangs’ car was gone and Xiao Zhan found himself packing boxes and bags with Yibo’s meagre belongings, silently carrying them down the stairs and across the threshold of his own home, a melancholy in his heart he couldn’t quite shake off.

Huifen’s words still hadn’t left him, would be with him for a long time, as well as the shock, disbelief and pain they brought.

The Wangs had made an obvious choice last night. Their absence spoke more than a thousand words and, unfortunately, it was what Yibo had expected. He had nodded bravely, like the strong young man he was, after Xiao Zhan had suggested making a clean cut and moving all of his belongings over.

Yibo didn’t even want to bother with the furniture, stating that it had come with the house and wasn’t his to begin with. So Xiao Zhan packed up his Legos, his clothes and the few picture frames, surprisingly never showing Yibo with his parents but with his dance group and grandparents. Xiao Zhan wondered whether they had never bothered taking family pictures at all, never bothered tracking Yibo’s growth by measuring him next to the doorframe.

Shaking his head sadly, Xiao Zhan continued folding t-shirts. The Wangs had moved houses so often, there was no chance to compare and track Yibo’s height.

At first, Yibo didn’t want to come over and help, and Xiao Zhan accepted it. If Yibo never wanted to see the inside of this house again, that was perfectly valid. But after a while, he suddenly appeared next to Xiao Zhan, wearing a big cozy jumper and the scarf and beanie Xiao Zhan had knitted for him. Together they made quick work and after the last box was carried out, Yibo fished the house key from his pocket, leaving it on the pristine kitchen counter.

They closed the door behind them for the last time, not looking back.

In the end, one had to protect one’s heart. It was a fragile little thing.

—

They spent the rest of the morning lazing the day away, watching One Piece and listening to Christmas music while Xiao Zhan baked more biscuits and Yibo build a new Lego set on the kitchen table, never far away from each other, not talking much but needing this, this comfortable, familiar domesticity.

‘Holidays start next week, huh?’ Xiao Zhan asked, after putting a glass of his homemade eggnog in front of Yibo. ‘Try, please.’

‘Mn,’ Yibo nodded and eyed the thick, creamy concoction doubtfully. ‘Friday is the last day. Ge, are you sure that’s not your cu- ouch!! Don’t hit me!’

‘Then don’t be silly! I’m not sure I got the ratio right…’

Yibo gave him a reproachful look, rubbed the back of his head, and took a sip of Xiao Zhan’s homebrew. Immediately, his eyes went wide as saucers, and he snorted in amusement.

‘Wow.’

‘It’s good?’ Xiao Zhan asked eagerly, wondering whether he got it right after all.

‘Yeah, if you want to get drunk in a very short time.’

‘Ah?’ Xiao Zhan’s heart sank, and he stared intently at the recipe on the kitchen counter, muttering to himself and double checking the measurements.

‘Gege, can I have more?’

‘So it is nice?’

‘Try yourself! It’s great, just very strong. But if that’s what you wanted, you nailed it!’

Xiao Zhan took a sip himself and started coughing immediately, not having expected the burning in his throat.

‘That… that’s not supposed to be like that!’ he spluttered and was about to pour the whole jug down the drain when Yibo screamed and pulled on his arm.

‘Don’t! Are you crazy? That stuff’s great, make more and bring it to Yingyue’s Christmas party!’

Xiao Zhan hesitated.

‘You think so?’

Yibo nodded enthusiastically. ‘Everyone will love it!’

‘If you say so…’

‘Cool, Zhan-ge!’

Yibo gave him the thumbs up and grinned, then checked his phone.

‘Seungyoun asked if I’m free to go skating,’ he announced and chewed on his bottom lip, while Xiao Zhan gazed out of the kitchen window.

‘Looks clear out there,’ he commented and shrugged. ‘Might as well.’

In the end, Yibo caught up with his friend in the afternoon, which worked perfectly fine for Xiao Zhan who used the Yibo-free time to put the finishing touches to his portrait and called in with the jeweller, checking on the process of his commission. His heart fluttered in anticipation and delight when the man told him it would be ready to pick up by the end of next week, and he thanked him once again profusely. Now he just needed to get the portrait framed and wrap everything up nicely and he was almost ready for Christmas Day!

During the next week, Xiao Zhan took Yibo out after school a lot. They went to a Christmas market together and enjoyed it, despite being rained on, huddling together under an umbrella and drinking steaming hot mugs of mulled wine, smiling at each other and giggling at their bloody bad luck. Yibo’s cheeks were red from the cold, but his eyes sparkled brighter than the hundreds of Christmas lights and, like so often, Xiao Zhan got lost in them.

They paid a visit to the rooftop restaurant when the weather was holding up and Xiao Zhan thought it was a wonderful idea to take Yibo ice-skating. It was, at least for Yibo, who picked up the skill easily and was skating loops around the stadium in no time, while Xiao Zhan was still struggling along, one hand on the railing and his butt hurting.

Eventually, Yibo took pity on him and held his hand while he clumsily made it around the ice rink without falling.

Yibo whooped in excitement and Xiao Zhan pressed him against the railing, kissing him stupid until an old lady loudly and repeatedly cleared her throat next to them.

They continued at home, after Yibo put soothing cream on Xiao Zhan’s backside, cackling all the while.

The cackles stopped when Xiao Zhan pressed him into the pillows and slid in between his legs, biting at his lip and grinding against him.

One night, they sat together and carefully answered the interview questions Yibo had received. The boy was a bit unsure at the start, insecure about his answers and whether they would be interesting enough for an audience, but Xiao Zhan assured him they were and, in the end, even Yibo was satisfied.

Xiao Zhan helped Yibo run his social media accounts and reply to requests that still kept coming through.

‘We still have to be polite,’ Xiao Zhan explained and adjusted his glasses. ‘You never know whether you’ll meet them again.’

‘Mn,’ Yibo sulked a little and rolled over onto his tummy where he was currently lounging on the carpet under the Christmas tree and looking like a gift himself.

Xiao Zhan shook his head and kept reading e-mails.

‘We can compose a standard response?’

‘Mn.’

Yibo kept poking the gifts under the tree, losing interest, and Xiao Zhan rolled his eyes. The boy had one last day of school left and Xiao Zhan would breathe a little easier once his holiday started, because he sorely needed it. Not only did Yibo have trouble sitting still and concentrating on things that didn’t interest him for a prolonged period, but he was also mentally exhausted and drained. The last months had taken a toll on him and despite all the wonderful and precious things that had happened in his life, it wasn’t only sunshine and butterflies.

Yibo still had therapy once a week to help him overcome his trauma. He had to deal with bullying by fellow students and office staff alike and had to come to realize that his relationship with his parents was broken and toxic. Even though the bullying had stopped since Miss Fang had left, it was a lot to deal with.

‘Gege, when are you starting your holiday?’ Yibo asked and prompted Xiao Zhan to blink at him owlishly.

‘Well, I’ll take off Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. And then New Year’s and when we leave for our trip.’

Yibo huffed and sat up cross-legged, head bumping against a Christmas ornament and making it jingle. He glared at it with a still sulky expression and Xiao Zhan bit his cheeks. Yibo looked adorable right now. The fact that he was wearing Christmas pyjamas with little gingerbread men on them didn’t help, and Xiao Zhan sat on his hands so he wouldn’t give in to the urge to squeeze and poke Yibo’s plump cheeks.

‘That’s not enough,’ Yibo stated. ‘You should take the same time off as me!’

‘Three weeks? Are you serious?’

‘When was your last holiday?’

‘Ah…’

Xiao Zhan picked up his reindeer plush and started fiddling with its Christmas jumper, avoiding Yibo’s gaze and feeling somewhat guilty.

‘Last Christmas I took five days off.’

‘Xiao Zhan!!’

‘Yes, yes, I know. Don’t sound so mortified. You know what? I’ll finish my last job and then I will take three weeks. It’s going to be slow over Christmas, anyway.’

Yibo gaped at him, mouth open, until a brilliant smile lit up his features and he crawled forward, scrambling onto Xiao Zhan’s lap and moving the reindeer carefully under the Christmas tree.

Next, Xiao Zhan received a barrage of tiny wet kisses on his face, causing him to tightly close his eyes when Yibo accidentally touched his glasses.

‘Aiya, hold on!’

Yibo leaned back, a boyish grin on his face.

‘And here I was, getting ready for a fight! Didn’t expect you to give in so easily! And before you try justifying it, don’t. You deserve to have some time off, more than anyone. You worked hard, Zhan-ge. Now take me to bed!’

Xiao Zhan did.

—

On Saturday evening, the first day of their holidays, Xiao Zhan packed up his home-made eggnog and looked up the stairs impatiently.

‘Yibo??’ he shouted, tapping his foot on the ground. They were already late for the party and Yibo was still upstairs, getting ready. ‘Did you fall asleep?’

Just before he decided to rush upstairs and see for himself, Yibo appeared at the top of the staircase, glaring at him.

‘Stop rushing me! I was doing my make-up,’ he hissed and tucked his freshly dyed blond hair behind his ear, while Xiao Zhan gave him approving elevator eyes, his prior annoyance already forgotten.

Just as they had planned, Yibo wore his green Christmas sweater with the gingerbread man on it, while Xiao Zhan had opted for a red version featuring a reindeer.

Yibo’s make-up was a little more colourful today, as was appropriate for a dress-up Christmas party, and he had rounded his outfit up with sparkly Christmas tree earrings and a red ribbon in his hair.

In Xiao Zhan’s opinion, he looked like the best Christmas gift he could wish for. Maybe Yibo would let him unpack him later.

When they arrived at the excessively decorated Lotus Pond café, the party was already up and running, and Xiao Zhan spotted his friends immediately. Yingyue was happy to invite all of them, after having met and bonded during and after the school festival.

Even Zhuocheng was wearing a Christmas sweater and Xiao Zhan nodded at him approvingly. He received a flat stare in response that turned into a look of curiosity when his eyes fell on the bowl of eggnog.

‘Is that alcoholic?’ he asked and followed Xiao Zhan over to the buffet tables.

‘Yeah,’ Xiao Zhan confirmed and scanned the room for Yingyue. ‘But take it easy. It’s strong.’

‘Pfffff, strong on the Xiao Zhan scale or the–JESUS CHRIST THAT’S STRONG!’

Xiao Zhan sighed and shook his head. ‘Leave some for everyone else, alright?’

In the end, Xiao Zhan found Yingyue by following Zhuocheng’s pining glances across the room. He kept looking, but didn’t go over and Xiao Zhan chewed his bottom lip in contemplation. Zhuocheng, despite his words of encouragement, didn’t seem to have taken the next step yet.

He left his friend and sought Yingyue out himself, wishing her happy holidays and congratulating her on a successful start as a café owner.

When he noticed Zhuocheng wasn’t the only one sneaking looks, he suppressed a grin and nudged Yingyue with his elbow, nodding towards his stiff friend.

Yingyue sighed immediately, a long-suffering expression on her face.

‘I have such a soft spot for him, you know? He makes me laugh without even trying! But I also have met no one as hardheaded and cautious! I’m literally hammering it in and he’s still not getting it!’

Xiao Zhan nodded along, agreeing with everything Yingyue said.

‘I think he needs a push.’

‘Oh please, push him as much as you can! I’m at the end of my wits here!’

Xiao Zhan squinted towards his friend, who was now talking to Yibo and Haikuan, squaring his shoulders.

‘Don’t worry,’ he assured Yingyue. ‘I have an idea.’

—

‘…all I was saying is that I would like you to not forget the true meaning of Christmas!’ Haikuan explained when Xiao Zhan re-joined his group of friends, gratefully accepting a glass of deliciously smelling mulled wine.

‘Yingyue made it,’ Yibo told him and stepped closer to his side. ‘You’ll like it. It’s not too strong.’

‘It’s gifting the people you love expensive cars, right?’ Ji Li answered Haikuan’s question and ducked when Felix, who was dressed as a Christmas angel, swatted at his head.

Haikuan cleared his throat and began lecturing Ji Li, but Xiao Zhan was already looking around the room, searching for something in particular.

‘Have you seen a mistletoe somewhere?’ he asked Yibo, who had helped himself to some eggnog and raised a suggestive eyebrow.

‘Wanna smooch? You know, you don’t need a mistletoe for that!’

‘Aiya, not for us,’ Xiao Zhan said with an amused huff and tucked a strand of Yibo’s hair behind his ear, fiddling playfully with his Christmas tree earring.

‘We’ll need to locate it and somehow maneuver Zhuocheng under it without him catching on,’ Xiao Zhan quickly explained and Yibo cocked his head, before realization hit and a huge gremlin smirk spread across his features. He giggled and rubbed his hands together in excitement.

‘Oh, that’s a perfect scheme, Zhan-ge! Let’s find it!’

Xiao Zhan quickly shushed Yibo and looked around cautiously. ‘Pretend you’re undercover, alright?’

‘Got it!’

They both casually strolled across the room, pretending to enjoy the decorations, until Yibo stopped.

‘Gege!’ he whispered urgently and pointed towards a spot on the wall they hadn’t been able to see properly before.

‘Oh, that’s easy!’ Xiao Zhan exclaimed when he noticed it was right next to where the big bowl of eggnog was sitting. ‘Should we offer him some more or wait?’

‘I think we won’t have to wait very long, he really likes it… But it might be empty soon, it’s very popular.’

They stood around a little listlessly, until the man in question appeared and Xiao Zhan sent a prayer to heaven, feeling like the universe also had enough of Zhuocheng’s reluctance.

‘He’s too far away from the mistletoe,’ Yibo whispered. ‘What should we do?’

‘Leave it up to me. I’m counting on you to make a ruckus.’

He petted Yibo’s shoulder before bracing himself and walking the few steps towards the buffet table, sidling up next to Zhuocheng, who poured another glass and gave him a shifty glance.

‘Why are you in my comfort zone?’ he asked, but didn’t receive an answer as Xiao Zhan took the glass from him and shoved him to the side. Zhuocheng absolutely did not expect the violent reaction and took a few steps backwards, gaping at Xiao Zhan, who took a casual sip of his eggnog.

‘YOU-’

‘OHOHO, HE’S UNDER THE MISTLETOE!’ Yibo shouted suddenly and jumped up and down in excitement, gaining a few amused and curious looks that immediately moved towards Zhuocheng, who frowned deeply and lifted his gaze.

Grumbling, he tried to shuffle away, but Xiao Zhan quickly pulled him back by his elbow.

‘Ah ah ah, no way. You have to stick to the rules!’

‘What rules??’ Zhuocheng asked in a low growl, ears bright red and trying to move away again. But this time, Yibo stepped into his path, signature smirk on his face and enjoying himself immensely.

‘You know the rules,’ he said and giggled behind his hand.

‘AHAHAHAHA OH SNAP!’

Ji Li and Felix had noticed the commotion and were now gloating as well.

‘Doesn’t look like anyone is coming to help you,’ Felix said and looked around the room. People had gone back to chatting, drinking and dancing while Zhuocheng remained lonely under the mistletoe, but Xiao Zhan could finally catch Yingyue’s gaze and gave her a thumbs up. She cocked her head, took in the situation, then grinned and excused herself from her current conversation.

‘Maybe I have to take one for the team,’ Felix mused jokingly and giggled, making exaggerated smooching noises and pretending to hold his arms out to Zhuocheng, who was flushing even harder now.

‘Step away, I’ve got this!’

Yingyue’s words sounded from behind them, confident and amused, as she resolutely walked up to Zhuocheng, smiled at him, then pulled his head down and kissed him straight on the mouth.

Zhuocheng’s arms kept rotating like windmills, and Xiao Zhan let out a surprised laugh, as all his friends cheered around them. He had only ever seen this in cartoon movies!

The kiss turned longer and longer and Zhuocheng eventually caught himself, arms wrapping around Yingyue and pulling her in. Everyone had long since stopped cheering.

Xiao Zhan cleared his throat meaningfully.

‘There’s still eggnog left….’ He mentioned casually and watched his friends quickly crowd the bowl, Yingyue and Zhuocheng forgotten in a corner.

No one was able to step under the mistletoe again that night.

—

Xiao Zhan was standing next to the decorative pond with Ziyi, watching Yibo, Lulu and Felix dance and feeling absolutely content, when Ziyi suddenly cursed and stared intently at him.

‘Don’t turn around and prepare. It’s your dumb ex.’

And soon enough, a figure appeared from within the crowd, stepping up to them and clearing his throat.

Zixin.

His ex had not changed at all and still looked like he did when Xiao Zhan had kicked him out. Even his haircut was the same. The same dimples that Xiao Zhan used to find so cute, the same light eyes he thought he could get lost in, did nothing for him now and left him cold.

‘Who let this one in?’ Ziyi muttered darkly to herself, loud enough for Zixin to hear, but he chose to ignore her.

Xiao Zhan wondered the same. But then, it was a big crowd and maybe he was someone’s friend, relative or simply worked close by. Xiao Zhan didn’t know. He hadn’t kept track. For him, it had been a clean cut back then and he would prefer it stayed that way.

When Zixin’s eyes fell on him, the only thing Xiao Zhan felt was a slightly unpleasant taste in his mouth and faint, lingering annoyance. Fortunately, his newfound happiness was too big and all-encompassing to ruin his mood and he couldn’t even find it in him to be angry or mad at Zixin.

‘Hi,’ Zixin said, sounding a little pressed.

Ziyi snorted loudly, not masking her displeasure, but, once again, Zixin ignored her.

‘Hi,’ Xiao Zhan retorted, staring indifferently at his ex-boyfriend, wondering what he ever saw in him.

Zixin opened his mouth once, then closed it again. Then he cleared his throat.

Not interested in what Zixin had to say and why he even approached him, Xiao Zhan let his eyes roam over the crowd once again, blatantly ignoring the other man. When he spotted Lulu, he perked up.

She was whispering urgently into Yibo’s ear, and the boy was frowning heavily.

Unbeknownst to Xiao Zhan, Zixin had observed him and followed his gaze. He nodded towards Lulu and Yibo, prompting Xiao Zhan to tense and finally give him his attention.

Only, Zixin didn’t know that he was walking on very thin ice now.

‘I see you like them young now,’ Zixin commented, going for casual and unbothered but landing in between venomous and slightly sulky.

Xiao Zhan raised an eyebrow, seeing through him immediately and put a soothing hand on Ziyi’s forearm when she tried to step in front of him, probably having a few things to say to Zixin.

‘I like them faithful,’ he replied firmly, face stern and disapproving. There was a choke from Ziyi’s direction following his words, and Zixin stared at him in shock.

‘Oh snap!’ Ji Li commented, and Xiao Zhan wondered where he came from.

Zixin was lost for words and only managed a weak, offended huff in return that prompted Xiao Zhan to cock his head at him expectantly. That was it?

‘Well, well, if that’s not the sound of regret I am hearing,’ Haikuan casually commented and once again, Xiao Zhan wondered where his other friend came from.

Suddenly there was a flash and the next moment Zixin was spluttering, eggnog running down his cheek, all over his sweater and dropping onto his shoes.

Yibo tucked his hair behind his ear delicately and Xiao Zhan knew the boy was trying hard not to gloat.

‘Excuse me, sir. I tripped,’ he apologized politely, the picture of innocence and Xiao Zhan’s eyes almost popped out of his head. He didn’t know whether he should feel pleased or scandalized or mortified.

Silence followed Yibo’s action. It was the silence before a storm, where everyone held their breaths, and it was only a matter of seconds before hell broke loose. Here, the hell that broke loose was Haikuan giggling.

Haikuan giggled. Behind his hand.

Xiao Zhan was too stunned to join in.

Ji Li was quiet, which didn’t bode well for anyone, but before Xiao Zhan could check on him, Zixin’s expression changed from confusion to rage and he took a step towards Yibo, seizing him up.

‘You…’ he started, but didn’t get any further before Yibo puffed himself up and glared back just as fiercely.

‘Leave my boyfriend alone, you dirty thief!’

Ziyi choked again.

‘Don’t talk to me like that, you …-’

‘I wouldn’t continue if I were you,’ Xiao Zhan said coldly, stepping into Zixin’s space and glaring down at him.

Funny.

The last time he was that close to Zixin, the situation was much, much different.

He cracked his knuckles and stared down at his ex-boyfriend, who obviously couldn’t believe what was happening. Xiao Zhan was up in his face like that? Threatening him? With violence?

He gulped and something that definitely was regret crossed his features, almost immediately replaced by hurt. Well, it was too late and Zixin deserved more than eggnog running into his eyes. Xiao Zhan made a mental note of telling Yibo off for wasting good booze later.

‘Sorry, we have a dress code today and you are not adhering to it. I’ll have to ask you to leave.’

Yingyue’s voice contained enough authority for Zixin to flinch and take a step back. Maybe Zhuocheng fiddling loudly and obviously with his handcuffs and mouthing ‘I know what you did’ had a part in it as well, but in the end, Zixin had no chance but to bolt.

He threw an incredulous look at Xiao Zhan, who had taken Yibo’s hand and was already turning towards his boyfriend, Zixin forgotten once again.

That’s how he missed his friends waving collectively at his ex and the last, broken-hearted look directed his way.

Xiao Zhan knew he had moved on from Zixin, but still, it was a nice confirmation and now he could finally close this chapter for good.

‘I have not given up on those plushies,’ Zhuocheng whispered intently to him, red lipstick all over his cheek and the corner of his mouth. He looked a little manic and Xiao Zhan deflated. He had thought he was intimidating enough to send Zixin scrambling, but now he had to admit that maybe Zhuocheng had a bigger part in it than himself.

‘Gege, are you alright?’ Yibo asked and glared daggers at the entrance door. ‘Lulu told me who he was, and I had to.’ He huffed. ‘I wanted to take the whole bowl but Ji li wouldn’t let me,’ Yibo moped and narrowed his eyes at the cheerful and red-cheeked man who was cackling at something on his phone together with Felix and Ziyi.

‘Did you film this?’ Xiao Zhan asked evenly and sighed when Ji Li nodded proudly.

‘Got a perfect angle of the eggnog incident. Even though I gotta cry. That shit’s too good to waste on an asshole like that. I’m seeing fairies!’

‘Oh dear…’

Xiao Zhan shook his head and laughed a little to himself.

‘I’m fine, Yibo. Don’t worry. Just a minor annoyance.’

‘He was trying to sus out if you were still into him. I could tell,’ Yibo explained seriously, and frowned even more.

‘Aiya, what’s with that face, ah?’ Xiao Zhan scolded him and let his thumb run across the crease on Yibo’s brow. ‘Your face will become wrinkly if you keep doing it.’

He winked, leaned down and placed a kiss on the corner of Yibo’s eye, careful to not smudge his make-up.

‘Don’t worry about him anymore. If he ever bothers us again, I won’t be as nice.’

Yibo choked.

‘That was nice? You were scary!’

‘Ah, well… He threatened you.’

Xiao Zhan shrugged while Yibo bit his bottom lip suggestively, eyes going half-lidded. ‘I think I’m getting tired, ge,’ he purred, not looking tired at all. ‘You might have to take me home soon.’

They stuck around for a little longer, but now that Xiao Zhan was aware of how horny Yibo was, he couldn’t quite keep his hands to himself anymore and became hotter and more fidgety the later it became, until Ziyi sighed exaggeratedly and called them a cab, muttering about public indecency and teenage hormones.

Xiao Zhan looked at Yibo sheepishly, but the boy only gave him a pleased little grin and fiddled with the ribbon in his hair, prompting Xiao Zhan to have a bit of an internal crisis on the spot. Yes, it was indeed an excellent decision to go home.

But when they arrived, Yibo slipped out of Xiao Zhan’s reach and rushed up the stairs, giggling all the while. Xiao Zhan blinked and followed him, wondering whether Yibo had a bit too much to drink. He himself was feeling only slightly tipsy, and he knew Yibo hadn’t had as much. Maybe it wasn’t the booze talking. Maybe he was just being a brat.

He caught up with Yibo in front of his bed, wrapping his arms around his slim waist and pulling him against him, making Yibo feel all of his arousal.

‘Ge, let me…’ Yibo wriggled in his grasp, still giggling breathlessly and Xiao Zhan loosened his embrace, only for Yibo to take off his jumper, then reach down to unbutton his jeans.

‘Aiyo, what’s with the rush…oh!’

Xiao Zhan’s hands hovered comically just over Yibo’s waist while his eyes were round like saucers, taking in the red and white striped over-knee stockings Yibo was wearing.

‘You like it, ge?’ Yibo asked coquettishly and turned around, walking back a few steps and moving his hips in sensual little circles. By now, he was wearing nothing but the stockings and the ribbon in his hair.

Xiao Zhan gulped, his own breath loud in his ears.

Almost automatically, he stepped forward, eyes locked on Yibo’s hard cock. The boy was indeed the best gift he could have hoped for, and Xiao Zhan licked his lips in anticipation.

But before he could get his hands on Yibo again, the boy pressed the palms of his hands against his chest, rubbing over the fabric and pouting exaggeratedly. Xiao Zhan stopped and cocked his head.

‘Ah?’

Words were still slow to come, and his expression must have been very comical, prompting Yibo to burst into wheezing laughter.

‘Gege, are you going to start drooling?’ he asked cheekily and pulled his shirt over his head.

‘I was wondering,’ he started, while moving on to Xiao Zhan’s pants, ‘if I can ride you tonight, Xiao Zhan.’

Xiao Zhan’s answer was nothing more than gibberish as his brain short-circuited and seemingly all the blood in his body moved down south.

He was hard and hot and Yibo made a very pleased sound, something that resembled a kitten’s purr, and made Xiao Zhan’s skin tingle all the way up his spine.

Finally, now that they were both rid of their clothes, he pushed Yibo onto the mattress and crawled on top of him, holding himself up by his hands and taking him all in, flushed and beautiful underneath him, huge cock resting against his tummy and legs slightly apart, inviting him in…

But first, Xiao Zhan had to appreciate the stockings some more.

‘You shaved your legs again?’ he asked in a low whisper as his fingertips ghosted down the thin material. There was no lace this time, but his blood was still boiling. Yibo must have remembered his reaction to the candy cane stocking idea and went ahead with it. Xiao Zhan was infinitely tender and so, so aroused. He hooked his thumb into the elastic top part and let it snap back against Yibo’s skin.

Yibo gasped under his touch and threw his head back, giving him a perfect view of his Adam’s apple and long neck.

Xiao Zhan reached down to squeeze himself, hissing through his teeth.

When he let go of himself, Yibo was on his elbows, biting his bottom lip and taking him in, eyes dark and needy.

‘Need you inside,’ he said in a low, breathless voice, and Xiao Zhan nodded, reaching for the lube.

‘On your back, ge,’ Yibo demanded, sounding exciting and nervous at the same time.

Xiao Zhan did as he was told, getting comfortable against a pile of pillows, slapping his thighs invitingly and winking at his brave, gorgeous boyfriend.

Usually, he was the one in charge of their bedroom activities. It was due to being the experienced one and leading Yibo along, but also because of his personality and personal preferences. He enjoyed being the one who called the shots and Yibo, so far, had enjoyed being the one to be led.

But at the same time, Xiao Zhan remained open-minded and curious, always up for experiments. Yibo still had so much to experience. There were already many things he was very much into, and Xiao Zhan couldn’t get enough of exploring with him together.

‘You want me to open you up like usual?’ he suggested, after Yibo sat down on his lap, ass rubbing over Xiao Zhan’s cock and thighs, caging him in.

From this position, Xiao Zhan could fondle the top of Yibo’s stockings to his heart’s delight. He hummed in approval and reached for the lube, but Yibo beat him to it.

‘I wanna do it,’ he said and flushed a pretty pink. ‘Do you want to watch me? Is that okay?’

Is that okay…

‘Yeah, yeah I wanna watch you,’ Xiao Zhan confirmed, voice nothing more than a rough whisper, while he became slightly light-headed. Of course, Yibo wanted him to watch. Wanted his attention, his praise, his eyes on him. Outside and inside the bedroom. He wanted to put on a show for his gege and Xiao Zhan felt giddy excitement, coupled with hot desire run through his veins.

‘Do you want to swap positions? It’ll be easier if you’re leaning against the headrest. And I can see you better,’ Xiao Zhan suggested, heated gaze already on Yibo’s perky little butt.

‘I think so,’ Yibo replied and crawled over to make himself comfortable, spreading his legs and sliding down a little.

‘Can you see?’ he asked, flush deepening, and opened the bottle of lube.

‘Yeah, I can…’

Xiao Zhan’s fingers itched to touch, to pinch the soft skin of Yibo’s smooth thighs, jerk his cock and prod at his hole, still looking tight and untouched.

He licked his dry lips and waited patiently for Yibo to get ready, heart thumping hard in his chest.

‘You can touch yourself while I do it,’ Yibo said. ‘But not too much… don’t get close. Is that okay?’

With a soft smile on his face, Xiao Zhan nodded. It was very considerate of Yibo to check with him, and he felt so very sheltered and taken care of. It was unbelievably attractive.

‘But… but if you do get close, that’s fine too,’ Yibo added and averted his gaze, pouting a little.

Xiao Zhan knew he was thinking about their after-dancing sexy times back at Spotlight and his eyes went even softer.

‘Okay, baobei. The same goes for you.’

‘I’m just loosening myself up, Zhan-ge,’ Yibo stated. ‘I won’t come.’

‘Mn.’

Yibo had warmed up lube between his fingers while he was talking and reached in between his legs, brow furrowed in concentration.

Xiao Zhan’s gaze flitted between the boy’s face and his hole, wanting to take everything in, every small reaction.

As soon as he entered himself with his middle finger, Yibo sighed and closed his eyes, moving tentatively. Xiao Zhan watched him closely, his own cock hard in his hand, desperate for attention, but receiving only small tugs and strokes.

It was not enough, but Xiao Zhan was into teasing himself and prolonging his pleasure, so he didn’t have an issue with Yibo asking him to hold back. The reward would be oh so sweet!

The hardest part was not to reach out and touch Yibo. Xiao Zhan had to remind himself firmly to stay away and appreciate with his eyes only. And oh, it was a feast indeed!

By now, Yibo had one finger inside his ass, moving gently and stretching himself, wetness around his digit and eyes focused on Xiao Zhan while he let out little gasps and pants.

‘Do you like it? Do I look good?’

Do I look good…

Xiao Zhan almost choked on air.

‘You look devastating, Yibo. I’m… I don’t have more words. Please keep going, you’re doing so well! Does it feel good? Opening yourself up?’

Yibo gave him a content grin before nodding and humming. ‘Different, but yeah. And I know how to do it properly now.’

‘Wanna add your index finger? Just be careful, your fingers are longer than mine.’

He swallowed after the statement, thumb rubbing over the head of his own cock and breath hitching.

The image of Yibo’s fingers squeezing into his tiny hole almost gave him a heart attack. So hot and filthy, it should be forbidden.

His heart beat even quicker in his chest as he took in his boyfriend writhing on two fingers in front of him.

‘So full…’ Yibo muttered and moaned brokenly. ‘Almost ready for gege…’ He mewled devastatingly, eyes still clear and fixed on Xiao Zhan’s face, drinking up his reaction.

And it must have been what he was looking for, because the movement of his fingers sped up and his eyes became darker. Xiao Zhan only noticed now that Yibo’s cock was a little shiny with pre-cum.

His eyebrows rose in surprise.

‘Not quite yet…’ he replied, using his best sex voice and watching Yibo shiver delightfully.

‘Such a pretty picture. Gege hasn’t had enough yet,’ he mused, squeezing his cock and gasping loudly.

‘Try reaching your spot, baobei. Can you do that for me?’

Yibo nodded eagerly, reaching deeper and eyelids fluttering. Eventually he let out a choked off moan that turned into continuous whines as he pushed his finger deeper inside of himself, curling upward.

‘Good boy, how does it feel? Does it feel as amazing as it looks? Wow, you’re stunning…’

Xiao Zhan kept the reassurances and praise going, seeing how much it egged Yibo on. The boy made desperate, almost feral noises now as he ground down on his own fingers, flush spreading over his face, all down his chest where his nipples were hard and perky. His cock was leaking heavily now, but Xiao Zhan didn’t even know whether Yibo was aware. Not once had he looked away from Xiao Zhan’s face.

‘Keep on going, sweetheart, you’re making gege so excited. Keep making yourself feel good, ah? Don’t hold back.’

‘Ge…Gege….,’ Yibo slurred and his eyes snapped open wide as his breath stuttered in his throat. His whole body started trembling slightly, and he rubbed against his prostate more frantically, panting and grunting.

Xiao Zhan might have forgotten how to breathe. Even his hand around his cock had stilled. Only his eyes were still busy, moving over Yibo’s body that was steadily surging towards release.

And Yibo didn’t believe he could come from just this…

The small smirk appearing on Xiao Zhan’s face made Yibo keen loudly and his movements lost their rhythm. Once or twice, his fingers twitched towards his cock unconsciously, but he didn’t follow through, only kept working himself over, gasps becoming louder and more desperate.

‘Zhan-ge!’ he called out and almost stopped moving all together, his body covered in sweat and chest heaving. He looked utterly fucked out, and it made Xiao Zhan’s insides alight. But he also realized what was happening. Yibo was becoming frustrated, almost there, but not quite. And he wasn’t even sure what exactly he was chasing.

‘Let gege take over. You did so, so well, my love. Will that be alright?’ he asked, words tumbling out of his mouth urgently, falling over each other. He was twitching towards Yibo, the need to be inside him so strong it was like a physical pull. He could give him what he was searching for.

Yibo only nodded frantically before removing his fingers with a wince.

Xiao Zhan scrambled over so quickly, it would have looked comical, and he leaned down immediately to catch Yibo’s lips in a filthy kiss, feeling the heat emanate from his body and seeing the tiny drops of sweat on his damp skin.

He didn’t take any more time admiring his stunning boyfriend before shoving his index and middle finger into Yibo’s hole and curling up, immediately finding what he was looking for.

Yibo cried out and clutched at Xiao Zhan’s shoulders like a frightened little pup, eyes wide and in disbelief as his body trembled and convulsed under him.

‘Yeah, that’s it, baobei, you’re almost there, just a little more. Relax. Everything is perfect, you are perfect. I love you so much,’ Xiao Zhan whispered and felt Yibo’s hole twitch madly around him. The same moment, Yibo let out a high, almost pained cry and started coming in small squirts, dripping onto his constricting abs and whimpering through it, overwhelmed and lost in pleasure that was unexpected and new to him, fingers digging into Xiao Zhan’s shoulders and letting Xiao Zhan guide him through his orgasm.

When Yibo came down from his height, Xiao Zhan removed his fingers gently, needing a moment to catch his breath himself and get over the tight, overly tender feeling in his chest. Yibo was blinking up at him, vulnerable and almost reverent, eyes still big and mouth a little slack.

Xiao Zhan smiled gently and let his thumb run across the mess on Yibo’s tummy, humming happily and winking at Yibo, causing a tired smile to cross his features. He held out his arms and Xiao Zhan took the invitation, gathering him up and holding him close, not even registering the stickiness between them, but fully aware of Yibo’s quick heartbeat.

He made shushing noises against the shell of his ear while stroking his hair, until Yibo had calmed down again and was nuzzling against his chest, purring like a large house cat.

‘You back with me?’ he asked and pressed a kiss on Yibo’s forehead.

‘Mn,’ came the hoarse response, and a moment later, Yibo cleared his throat.

‘I don’t know… I didn’t know…’ Yibo stuttered and huffed when Xiao Zhan laughed warmly, punching his shoulder weakly. ‘Don’t laugh, gege. I didn’t know that was possible.’

‘I figured,’ Xiao Zhan replied, feeling kinda smug and accomplished and quite ecstatic. The image of Yibo’s o-face and the way he had spilled all over himself untouched wouldn’t leave his mind for a very, very long time.

‘Still gonna ride you,’ Yibo muttered and gazed up at him with a cheeky grin on his face. ‘Just give me a few moments to recharge.’

And Yibo did, sliding down on Xiao Zhan’s cock slowly, eyelids fluttering and groaning with it. He was properly prepared and loose, but the bigger stretch still always took him a while to get used to.

Once he did, Yibo enthusiastically rode him, like he had done it a hundred times before, using his strong dancer’s thighs as he bounced up and down Xiao Zhan’s cock, letting out breathless little ah noises that were mirrored by Xiao Zhan who could do nothing but hold on for dear life, one hand on Yibo’s waist and one on his thigh, hooking his thumb behind the elastic of the stocking.

When he came, his toes curled, and he thought he saw fireworks light up behind his eyelids. Yibo kept riding him through it, hand flying over his own cock and movements becoming more frantic.

With a big sigh, Yibo almost collapsed, and Xiao Zhan felt the wetness of his release only shortly after, mixing with the sweat on his skin.

Carefully, he maneuvered them onto their sides, slipping out in the process and cringing when Yibo whimpered weakly.

‘I know, I know,’ he soothed him. ‘Sorry.’

‘Gege needs to make me a bath,’ Yibo sniffled. ‘Feeling so sore now.’

‘Aiya, baobei, it’s past midnight! You really want a bath now?’

Yibo nodded sulkily. ‘And want you to join.’

‘I told you before, the bathtub isn’t big enough for both of us,’ Xiao Zhan explained patiently and laughed, feeling so sweaty and exhausted but utterly satisfied and euphoric. ‘We can start saving money for a bigger one,’ he suggested, but Yibo was still adamant, arguing that he would make himself small and that they could at least try.

So Xiao Zhan found himself in a bathtub at 1am at night, pulling his limbs in and unable to move, with Yibo sitting in between his legs, leaning back and sighing happily.

He huffed out an amused laugh as he took in his boyfriend’s blissed out state. Yibo couldn’t be comfortable right now, just like him, but he made it work.

Xiao Zhan loved him so very much.

Before either of them could fall asleep, he bullied Yibo to have a quick shower, and they fell into bed under the warm and comfortable glow of the nightlight.

—

It was odd, to not get up on Monday morning and give Yibo a goodbye kiss before school, then start work himself and Xiao Zhan felt a little lost when he bustled around in the kitchen, listening to Yibo’s excited chatter about the gifts he got for him and how excited he was to watch him open them.

Xiao Zhan nodded along absent-mindedly, while opening the fridge, then the pantry and then the fridge again and didn’t even realize Yibo had stopped talking, until a pair of arms wrapped around his waist and Yibo cuddled up to him, pressing a kiss to the middle of his back and swinging him around, pushing him down onto a chair.

‘Zhan-ge, I’ll teach you how to enjoy your holidays, I’ve got you!’ Yibo stated and put a shiny new book in front of him.

‘This was supposed to be one of your Christmas presents, but it’s actually a dumb idea because you won’t be able to use it until next year…. so you can have it a few days earlier!’

At first, Xiao Zhan wanted to scold Yibo for breaking with traditions and inviting bad luck into their home, but once he read the title of the book, the words died in his mouth and he eagerly began flipping through it, while Yibo busied himself with making coffee, cackling all the while.

It was a Christmas themed cooking book, with festive twists on popular recipes, and Xiao Zhan’s eyes lit up once they landed on ‘Gingerbread French toast’.

‘Thank you, Yibo. I love it!’ he responded and jumped up again, now feeling more grounded and having a plan.

First, he twirled his boyfriend around, gave him a kiss and told him how much he loved him. Then he made them breakfast.

During the week, Xiao Zhan took the time Yibo was out to frame his portrait, wrap it neatly and put it under the Christmas tree. He wrapped more gifts for Yibo, for his mama and baba and for his friends, even though they wouldn’t receive them until later. When only the small jewelry box remained, Xiao Zhan hesitated. It was such an intimate present, and even though he loved his parents to bits, he felt he needed to give it to Yibo when they were alone.

He nodded to himself and kept the box close.

The night before Christmas Eve, Xiao Zhan was standing in the kitchen, putting the finishing touches to his Xmas menu spread and feeling all giddy with anticipation. His stomach fluttered when he thought of Yibo receiving his presents … and he quickly took the custard off the stove to not burn it.

Yibo was similarly excited, and Xiao Zhan had already slapped his hands when he got over-eager and started fiddling with one of his gifts.

‘I’m just looking, I’m not opening it!’ the boy defended himself and huffed, playing offended. ‘I can control myself.’

‘Mn, sure,’ Xiao Zhan answered and rolled his eyes. ‘Start up the Nintendo. I’m almost finished and ready to kick your ass.’

‘You wish! Ge, I’m wearing my comfort onesie. You’ve never defeated me when I’m wearing my comfort onesie, hehe!’

He proceeded to slap Xiao Zhan with his cow tail, until Xiao Zhan picked up a wooden spoon and chased the squealing boy towards the living area, where he hid behind the Christmas tree, making the ornaments move precariously.

Xiao Zhan walked back to the kitchen, shaking his head, even though his lips curled up into a fond smile. He was glad that Yibo was so carefree. Of course, he had moments of contemplation, where he was sad and mourned. He often sat quietly at the kitchen table, staring at nothing, lost in his mind. The feeling of betrayal, of loss and being unimportant and not wanted wouldn’t just go away from one day to the next. They talked about it. Whenever Yibo needed it. And sometimes when Xiao Zhan needed it. And slowly, the pain receded. Would hopefully be only a faint memory one day.

Right now, they were happy. And would only continue collecting more and more happy memories.

Xiao Zhan looked out of the window into his front garden, where his decorations illuminated the garden beds and the snowflakes gently floated through the air.

He did a double-take and his eyes almost popped out of his head.

Snowflakes?

It wasn’t supposed to snow! Surely, the weather had gotten colder, icy even, but when he checked earlier, there wasn’t a huge possibility of actual snow.

When he had recovered from his shock, he smiled so wide, his eyes turned into crescent moons and he quickly scrambled to put on his shoes and wrap a scarf around his head before he rushed outside onto his porch.

And. Yes! Those were real snowflakes, falling thick and heavy and covering the grass and the sidewalk. He could already see a thin sheen on top of his car.

With nothing but childish joy in his heart, Xiao Zhan ran down the few steps and lifted his face up to the sky, feeling the icy snowflakes cover his hot skin, cling to his lashes and melt down his cheeks.

He couldn’t help it and started laughing loudly, feeling all the stress, all the lingering worry and pain drain away, replaced by nothing but happiness and gratefulness. Xiao Zhan was alive; he was healthy; he had found the love of his life, had the best friends and parents around him. What else would he want?

‘Yibo!!’ he shouted and giggled to himself. ‘Lao Wang! It’s snowing! Come outside!’

Only a moment later, Yibo’s confused little face appeared in the window. The boy had the hood of his cow onesie up and the moment he saw the falling snow and Xiao Zhan standing in the middle of it, his eyes became bright, then soft and he smiled his beautiful gummy smile that always took Xiao Zhan’s breath away.

‘I’m coming, gege!’ he shouted back and a few second later, Yibo appeared, wearing his UGG boots and whooping.

‘Told you to not give up hope!’ he exclaimed and lifted his head up towards the sky as well, laughing freely.

Xiao Zhan cooed a little at the fluffy snow cow, but mostly, he was so, so in love and so fond of his boyfriend, he couldn’t stop smiling. The snowfall became heavier by the minute and the world looked already so peaceful and covered in a blanket of white. Xiao Zhan felt infinitely lucky he was able to witness it.

A dull thud made him look to the side, freeze and then laugh once again, shaking his head in amusement.

‘What? I’m making a snow angel!’ Yibo complained and pouted at him. ‘Make one too!’

‘Sure, why not!’

Xiao Zhan sank down on his back, moving his arms and legs and giggling manically, feeling a little high and almost hysterical. He didn’t even notice the way the wetness soaked through his pants and jumper, didn’t register the cold.

‘Do you think we can build a snowman?’ Yibo asked enthusiastically, after petting Xiao Zhan down and taking his hands in the middle of the garden, next to the fence, where it all began.

‘Definitely! If it keeps on going like that all night, we can build an igloo.’

‘And then have sex in it!’

‘Wang Yibo, where’s your head, ah? You little horny gremlin!’

Yibo wheezed while Xiao Zhan tickled him, trying to not let the wiggly cow get away and cackling himself.

In the end, he stopped and cupped Yibo’s face gently, stroking over his smooth red cheeks.

Yibo’s wide grin turned into a smaller, more intimate one and his eyes sparkled, taking Xiao Zhan’s breath away, just like every day of his life.

‘I love you so much, Xiao Zhan. Thank you for choosing me,’ Yibo whispered and pulled him down by the collar of his jumper, bringing their lips together in a tender and sweet kiss, while the snow kept falling around them.

They stood there, looking at each other and kissing, until Yibo complained about not feeling his fingers anymore and Xiao Zhan quickly rushed him inside, where he ran him a bath, unable to get the goofy grin off his face all night.

—

When Xiao Zhan opened his eyes in the early morning, the first thing he did was pull aside the curtains and look outside. Immediately, he let out a content sigh. The world was white and beautiful, snow covering the ground and the tops of cars as far as the eye could see. A few people had already cleaned the sidewalks, and he decided to get out his shovel and do the same. After he had a coffee.

‘Yibo,’ he whispered and gave the still sleeping boy a soft kiss on the cheek, giggling when Yibo scrunched up his nose and pawed at the air, then yawned widely.

Xiao Zhan had to lean in again and-

‘Zhan-ge!’ Yibo shouted indignantly. ‘What did I tell you about biting my cheeks?’

‘I was hungry,’ Xiao Zhan replied and showed Yibo his teeth, going in for another bite.

The boy wriggled in his grasp, as Xiao Zhan rained kisses and little bites all over his face, only stopping when Yibo threatened to not make him any coffee this morning.

‘You’re too much this early in the morning!’ Yibo exclaimed, but hid an amused smile when he shuffled into the bathroom to get ready for the day.

They built a snowman right after breakfast, and then, when Yibo lamented one would be lonely, they built another one.

‘There,’ Xiao Zhan said and picked up some pebbles to use as eyes for their snow buddies. ‘Two good friends.’

‘Very good friends,’ Yibo corrected him. ‘Maybe more?’

‘Aiya, okay, they’re married. Happy?’

‘Mn!’

Yibo nodded, looking very smug in his green beanie and scarf.

‘Let’s take a selfie!’ he suggested and pulled on Xiao Zhan’s scarf. Do you have your phone?

Xiao Zhan ended up taking a few pictures with the snowman in the background and they posted one of them on their social media, wishing everyone happy holidays.

Once they were back inside, having hot chocolates with marshmallows, Xiao Zhan saw he had received a new message from Peng Chuyue.

With a wince, he opened it, feeling a little guilty for not keeping in touch. They had texted here and there, but Xiao Zhan hadn’t attempted to arrange another catch up or checked in with Chuyue as often as he should have.

[Peng Chuyue]: Happy Holidays! You look thrilled! Hope you’re having a few days off?

[Xiao Zhan]: Happy Holidays to you too! I’m off work for three weeks, we should catch up some time if you’re around!

[Peng Chuyue]: Xiao Zhan?? Is that you???

[Peng Chuyue]: Haha, just joking! Yeah, would be great. I’m sure we’ll have lots to talk about. How about Friday morning? I’m off as well and we could have breakfast in the café Yibo is working at?

[Xiao Zhan]: Sounds great, let’s do it. And tell Yibo Happy Holidays too! I’ve seen the video of his group dance and watched the ones you sent me. He’s incredible. You weren’t exaggerating!

Xiao Zhan huffed.

‘Chuyue sends his greetings and says Happy Holidays,’ he told Yibo, who was currently deciding which Christmas outfit to wear for the day. ‘He watched you dance and complimented you.’

‘Oh!’ Yibo perked up, a green and a white sweater in his arms. ‘Say thank you. Mn. That’s very nice of him.’

‘Will do. And you should pick the green one. I’ll wear red. It fits together well.’

As soon as Xiao Zhan said goodbye to Chuyue, he received another new message and raised his eyebrows.

‘Oh!’

‘What is it?’ Yibo asked, in the process of undressing in the middle of the living room.

‘It’s mama and baba, they’re almost there and asked me to pick them up from their holiday home. Don’t you want to do this in the bedroom, Yibao?’

Yibo pouted. ‘Wanna be with you!’

‘Aiya, clingy!’ Xiao Zhan muttered, but pulled Yibo in, tilted his chin up and pressed their lips together in a warm and tender kiss.

‘I’ll stay here and tidy up some more,’ Yibo said against his lips and pecked the corner of his mouth one more time before pushing Xiao Zhan towards the door and humming to himself.

‘Don’t open any presents while I’m gone!’

‘Won’t!’

The drive took him only about ten minutes and it would have been even faster if he didn’t have to go slow due to all the snow on the road. Lots of it had already been moved but some of the side streets he took still looked rather dangerous and he didn’t want to end up having an accident on Christmas Eve!

He arrived at the neat little cottage just before lunch, but there was no trace of his parents. Frowning, Xiao Zhan checked his phone but couldn’t see another message. They wouldn’t have had an accident on the way, right?

Fretfully, he waited a few more moments, deciding to give them a call if they didn’t turn up soon, but he needn’t have worried, as his parents’ car appeared from around a corner, and his shoulders slumped forward in relief.

After all the hugs and well-wishes were exchanged, Xiao Zhan helped his parents bring their luggage into the building, walking along the pebbled path and finally getting what they saw in the tranquil little cottage. It really looked like a winter wonderland right now, all untouched and covered in snow.

‘For how long will you be around?’ he asked after taking in the suitcases. He didn’t think his parents were staying more than a few days, but the way they were set up looked a little over the top.

‘We will be here for a week,’ Xiao Qianfan announced and winked. ‘So many of our old friends are still here. We’re taking the chance to catch up.’

‘Will Jianguo be alright?’

‘Don’t worry, Xiao Zhan! Your baby is being well looked after, and she’ll have an amazing Christmas as well!’

‘Ah, that’s good then!’ Xiao Zhan replied, feeling a little lighter again.

‘Also, we changed our minds, darling. You don’t have to give us a lift. We’ll drive ourselves!’ Xiao Yutong told him happily and missed Xiao Zhan choking on nothing but air. So, he came out here for nothing?

Grumbling to himself, he shuffled back to his car, but when he caught his parents chatting excitedly to each other, his sour mood dissipated again like smoke. It was only a few minutes after all. No need to be annoyed.

Once they arrived at Xiao Zhan’s place and his parents admired his holiday set up extensively, he had forgotten everything about the little unnecessary excursion and nodded approvingly at Yibo, who, in his absence, had switched on music and put snacks and drinks on the table.

The boy hugged both of his parents and was jumping a little on the spot when he saw the packages Xiao Qianfan put under the tree.

‘Is there something for me too?’ he asked eagerly, and made big eyes at the additional gifts.

‘Of course!’ Xiao Yutong said indulgently and hugged Yibo close to her side. ‘Who turns up without a present for their hosts, ah? Do you think we don’t have manners, young man?’

She winked to show she was joking, but Yibo was already giggling sheepishly.

They spent a wonderful day together, chatting, laughing, and eating too much food. Xiao Zhan’s eggnog was a hit, and he even made a nonalcoholic version his father, who was the designated driver today, was very pleased about.

Xiao Zhan rolled his eyes and flushed when his mama pulled out an old picture album and huddled together on the couch with Yibo by her side, both of them cackling and cooing at baby Xiao Zhan.

‘Ge, you had such chubby cheeks, oh my god!’ Yibo exclaimed at some point and showed him a photo of a maybe 3year old version of himself on a rocking chair.

‘I did,’ Xiao Zhan said evenly and plopped down next to him. ‘But I grew out of them…’

He proceeded to snatch Yibo’s plump cheek and squeeze, while the boy squealed and tried to wriggle away. In the end, Mama Xiao had to separate them.

‘Children! You’re going to knock your glasses over. Calm down now!’

‘He asked for it, mama!’ Xiao Zhan argued and gave Yibo, who stuck his tongue out at him a filthy glare.

‘Xiao Zhan, you are the older one!’

Yibo cackled gleefully, while Xiao Zhan was scolded by his mama.

‘What’s this, auntie?’ the boy asked and pointed at a wrapped bottle under the Christmas tree.

‘Ah!’

Xiao Yutong let Xiao Zhan get off the hook and reached for the gift.

‘I guess we can already open this one. It’s gingerbread liqueur auntie Du Hua made. There should also be a wedding invitation among her presents.’

She ended with a tired sigh and shook her head while Xiao Qianfan nodded along and got up to take four glasses out of the kitchen cupboard.

They made a toast and clinked glasses, three with liqueur, one filled with nonalcoholic eggnog.

‘To a wonderful new year! May all your dreams come true!’ Xiao Yutong proclaimed before tasting the homebrew.

She coughed delicately after one sip.

‘That is definitely made by Du Hua.’

Xiao Zhan nodded, while wiping away the tears in his eyes. His eggnog was tame compared to this!

‘It’s nice,’ Yibo said, unaffected. ‘Mn. Tell her thank you. When is the wedding?’

‘Oh, it’s in August and it’s taking place in that damn castle! Do you know it’s supposed to be haunted? Someone was MURDERED there!’

Xiao Yutong dished out her tea in a hushed voice before Xiao Zhan was able to cover Yibo’s ears and the boy let out a frightened yelp.

‘What?’ he asked timidly and shuffled closer to Xiao Zhan. ‘That’s not true, right? Right?’ he asked in a small voice and Xiao Zhan petted his head in comfort while glaring at his mama. Did she have to? Now he would probably have to go without a plus one!

‘Well, that’s the story, but it’s blown out of proportions to make the spot a location, if you know what I mean,’ Xiao Qianfan clarified and rolled his eyes. ‘It’s an old building with a lot of character. But there are no ghosts or hauntings.’

Yibo relaxed a little and nodded, still looking rather suspicious.

‘I don’t think it is an appropriate location for a wedding!’ Xiao Yutong said firmly, and Xiao Zhan knew this was not the first time the conversation happened.

‘Ge, we have to take all the nightlights and flashlights and I definitely need the TV on if we’re sleeping there,’ Yibo whispered, and Xiao Zhan nodded diligently. He’d bring the whole house if it meant Yibo would be more comfortable.

‘There are no TVs,’ Xiao Qianfan informed them and coughed delicately. ‘I think they’re trying to keep the… atmosphere.’

‘Is there at least running water?’ Xiao Zhan asked, already feeling quite aggrieved. The wedding venue really was a choice.

‘There is. And part of the place has electricity and heating.’

Xiao Zhan didn’t comment on the ‘part of it’ and only nodded. If he’d look at it as an adventure, maybe then it would be fine.

In absolutely no time, the sun was going down and Xiao Zhan switched on the Christmas tree lights, making the room seem even warmer and cozier. There was this beautiful feeling of anticipation in the air that he still remembered from his childhood whenever it was time for the gift exchange. Nowadays, he found the same joy in getting together with his family, spending time with his loved ones and going all out on decorations and baking. He enjoyed giving away more than receiving and was already looking forward to Yibo’s bright eyes when he saw his presents.

‘We will give you boys your gifts first,’ Xiao Yutong said generously and eyed the spread under the tree. ‘Yibo first,’ she said and handed him three packages.

Yibo oooh-ed and made big eyes.

‘So many? Just for me?’ he asked and swallowed thickly. Xiao Zhan watched him, chest full of love for his parents’ generosity and adoration for Yibo’s delight.

‘Open them, Yibo!’ Xiao Qianfan encouraged him, looking just as excited as Yibo as he leaned back on the couch, sipping on a mug of tea.

Yibo sat down cross-legged under the Christmas tree and Xiao Zhan couldn’t help reaching for his camera and taking a few snaps. Yibo was oblivious, fully concentrated on unwrapping his gifts.

He did it neatly, not ripping apart the paper, but detaching it carefully. And somehow, Xiao Zhan was not surprised. It was one more of Yibo’s adorable quirks.

The first bulky package contained a coffee machine Lego set and Yibo admired it properly before moving on and cooing over a pair of cute little lion earrings.

The last gift made him pause and stare at it on his lap, completely still and eyes a little shiny.

Xiao Zhan craned his neck to see from where he was sitting on the floor and robbed a little closer when he realized Yibo was getting quite emotional.

As soon as he saw what it was, he fully understood Yibo’s sentiment. His own eyes might have gotten a little misty too, as he nudged his boyfriend with his elbow, smiling fondly.

‘Open it,’ he said.

The photo book contained shots from Yibo’s dancing performance, and they were wonderful! But there weren’t only those. Xiao Zhan’s father had taken pictures of everyone who was there to support Yibo too! There was a photo of Yu Bin proudly holding up his sign, Ji Li and Felix grinning in the background, Lulu and Ziyi smiling and holding up flyers, there was Zhuocheng clapping along and there was Xiao Zhan, eyes fixed on the stage, pure love and pride in his eyes.

He swallowed heavily, feeling a lump in his throat and listening to Yibo’s quiet sniffles.

The last two pictures were a group photo, obviously taken when Xiao Zhan’s parents took their friends out for dinner, as well as a shot of Xiao Zhan and Yibo, posing for the camera after the performance. He had almost forgotten!

A Christmas card fell out of the back of the book and Xiao Zhan scooped it up, handing it to Yibo.

The message read simply:

Yibo, we’re wishing you Merry Christmas and a wonderful New Year. Stay true to yourself and keep reaching for the stars!

Love, Mama and ba

Xiao Zhan pulled his boyfriend in when he started crying, knowing full well what the message had done to Yibo and where his thoughts were. It was bittersweet, and he felt it himself, as he swallowed down the tears, stroking Yibo’s back and holding him close.

A look at his mama and baba showed them both touched as well. Xiao Yutong had tears in her eyes too.

‘I’m s… sorry,’ Yibo muttered, after his shoulder stopped shaking. ‘I didn’t m… mean to cry. I love the gifts. Thank you so, so much!’

‘We know, darling,’ Xiao Yutong said soothingly and accepted Yibo’s hug. ‘It’s fine, we understand. And we’re glad you enjoyed them.’

‘Thank you,’ Yibo said, moving on to Xiao Qianfan. ‘Thank you for taking all those photos… and for passing your skills on to your son.’

He cackled, and Xiao Zhan was relieved to see that his joy was stronger than his sadness.  

‘Ge, now yours!’ Yibo exclaimed and sat down next to him, looking at the Xiao’s expectantly.

‘Here you go, son!’ Xiao Qianfan said and handed Xiao Zhan two packages and with Yibo sticking close to his side, Xiao Zhan opened them quickly, ripping the paper to shreds and ignoring Yibo’s amused huff.

‘Oh!’

He held up the box with a shiny new camera lens, examining it carefully and already excited to try it.

‘Thank you!’ he said with feeling. ‘Can’t wait to try that one!’

The second package contained a knitted cardigan he immediately fell in love with and an envelope.

He opened it curiously and immediately his eyebrows rose in stunned surprise.

‘Mama! Baba! You can’t-’

‘Aiya, son, shut up and accept it, will you?’ Xiao Yutong chided him with an amused smirk on her face. ‘It was the natural thing to do.’

Xiao Zhan’s father made a sound of agreement. ‘And it wasn’t even that pric-’

‘Will you shut up too??’ Xiao Yutong interrupted her husband with a glare. ‘Our son doesn’t need to know about that!’

‘What is it, ge?’ Yibo asked curiously, tugging on his arm.

Xiao Zhan handed him the modified booking confirmation of their holidays.

When Yibo saw they were now going away for a whole week instead of a long weekend and that their room had been upgraded to a deluxe accommodation he whooped in delight and did a little happy dance on his knees, shaking Xiao Zhan’s arm and prompting him to laugh, affected by Yibo’s delight.

They thanked his parents profusely and after that, handed them their presents.

Xiao Zhan had gotten his mama and baba tickets for a theater performance he knew they wanted to see for a while, a picture of a sunflower he had worked on for the past few weeks, next to Yibo’s portrait and Yibo had made them up a little gift basket with local produce and a fancy bottle of wine.

Xiao Yutong and Xiao Qianfan were stoked!

When they were done admiring their gifts, Xiao Zhan sheepishly pushed another little gift bag towards them.

‘That’s for Jianguo,’ he said and laughed awkwardly, missing his cat more than he wanted to admit. ‘Those are just a few new toys and some snacks she used to enjoy.’

He shrugged dismissively when his mother accepted the bag and smiled softly at him. ‘She will enjoy it, ZhanZhan.’

‘Now you have to unwrap my presents!’ Yibo exclaimed and shoved two packages onto his lap.

Xiao Zhan blinked the lingering sadness away and gave Yibo a flat stare. ‘Yibo, you already gave me the book!’

‘Yeah, but I said I had more things…’ Yibo admitted and grinned widely. Xiao Zhan returned the smile, the urge to kiss Yibo almost too hard to resist, but making out in front of his parents was not an option.

In Yibo’s prettily wrapped gift boxes, he found a pair of new runners and a squishy fur seal plush with big beady eyes. The plushie immediately won over his heart and he thanked Yibo with a kiss to his cheek, then pushed his own gift boxes into Yibo’s hands, whispering that he had something else for him later.

Yibo cocked his head before a pleased smile flitted across his features, and he nodded in understanding. Then he began unwrapping, finding the Lego treehouse and a new set of eyeliner and lipgloss.

‘Ge, that’s the one I was looking at when you took me to the mall for the first time!’ Yibo exclaimed and laughed happily. ‘That’s so funny!’

‘Mn, I watched you look at it,’ Xiao Zhan explained, feeling very accomplished and was about to get up and look for a rubbish bag for the discarded gift wrapping when Yibo pushed him down again.

‘We’re not done,’ he said ominously and winked, looking like he was buzzing with excitement.

‘Ah?’

Xiao Zhan blinked at him owlishly, then at his mama and his baba, who just shrugged and raised their eyebrows, pretending to know nothing.

But Xiao Zhan knew his parents. They were definitely in on whatever this was!

‘Ge, you have to do something for this, alright?’ Yibo instructed eagerly, eyes bright with delight and anticipation.

Xiao Zhan nodded, curiosity getting the better of him.

‘Okay,’ Yibo said. ‘Just sit here, cross-legged, and hold out your arms. Oh, and close your eyes. Don’t open them until I tell you. Promise?’

‘Uh, okay,’ Xiao Zhan replied a little suspiciously, but more intrigued. He did what Yibo told him to do and listened to the boy get up, hearing his receding footsteps.

‘Don’t peek! No matter what!’ Yibo shouted from where he was, not far away, and Xiao Zhan huffed out a laugh.

‘Won’t!’ he shouted back, feeling a little nervous. What could Yibo possibly have planned for him?

‘I’m coming back now!’

‘Ah!’

Xiao Zhan straightened his back, hands in front of him, palms up and waiting with bated breath.

‘Alright ge, prepare yourself and hold still!’

When something warm and soft touched his hands, Xiao Zhan almost flinched, but remembering Yibo’s words, he stayed calm and held on to what he was given. At first, he thought it was another plushie, but then the warm and fluffy thing started moving and meowing and Xiao Zhan choked, closed eyes immediately filling with tears and a lump forming in his throat.

‘You can open your eyes now!’ Yibo said, sounding like he was smiling.

He knew what he was going to see, but still, the sight of his Jianguo looking up at him with big eyes made his vision immediately blur and his heart thump heavily in his chest, a myriad of emotions overwhelming him. There was surprise and a bit of anxiety, but most of all, there was joy and relief and the feeling of a missing piece of his heart being returned and clicking back into place.

Xiao Zhan choked out wet laughter and sniffled, unable to form words and unable to tear his gaze away from his cat, who was currently kneading dough on his thighs.

When Jianguo rubbed her tiny head against his chest and started purring, Xiao Zhan broke down, sobbing like a baby, big tears of gratitude running down his cheeks.

In a flash, Yibo was there next to him, hugging him close, and Xiao Zhan leaned into the embrace, burying his face in the crook of Yibo’s neck, one hand in Jianguo’s fur, the other around Yibo’s back, letting himself be comforted.

Eventually, he felt a pat on his shoulder, followed by a smooch to his cheek and his mama’s familiar perfume invaded his senses. Xiao Yutong laughed softly while Xiao Qianfan kept petting his back, telling him it was alright.

‘Gege, she’s home again and I think she’s happy about it!’ Yibo whispered, prompting Xiao Zhan to look deeply into his eyes and just …stare, letting himself imagine.

This right next to him was the man Xiao Zhan was going to marry one day. There was no doubt in his heart and mind and the thought, so momentous and life-changing, didn’t scare him at all. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with the boy next door, the love of his life, his soulmate, his gouzaizai, his white peony, his Yibo.

And of course, his Jianguo.

Xiao Zhan frowned.

‘Is that why you asked me to pick you up and then didn’t need me to…?’ he asked his parents and sniffled noisily.

Jianguo took the moment to hop off his lap and sniff the Christmas tree.

Yibo handed him a tissue.

Laughing, his mama nodded and gave him a big hug.

‘Yibo arranged Jianguo’s return a while ago, but we didn’t know how to get you out of the house without making you suspicious.’ She shrugged. ‘It was easy and effective!’

Xiao Zhan laughed, but quickly, laughter turned into a shocked expression.

‘I… I don’t have any cat food or a bed for her… or…’

He was freaking out, eyes darting left and right, until his baba chuckled warmly and squeezed his shoulder.

‘Don’t worry, we took care of everything. All her necessities are currently set up in the laundry. She’s a spoiled little princess indeed!’

‘You can let her open her gift now,’ Yibo said, voice so soft and gentle, it made a shiver run down Xiao Zhan’s spine and he nodded, still somewhat feeling like this couldn’t be real. This was just a dream and at any moment he’d wake up.

But alas, he didn’t, and it got better and better.

He spent the evening chatting, laughing, gazing lovingly at his wonderful boyfriend and playing with Jianguo, still in awe that she was really here, prowling around his living room and becoming familiar with the area.

Before his parents left, they asked Xiao Zhan and Yibo to sit in front of the Christmas tree with Jianguo and pose for their first ever Christmas Eve photo.

Yibo ended up with Jianguo on his lap, while Xiao Zhan kissed his cheek and made him smile brightly.

It was only the first of many Christmas photos, and all of them would remain precious to them.

When they were alone again, Xiao Zhan did what he wanted to do all night and pulled Yibo into a deep and tender kiss, nibbling at his bottom lip and nudging his lips apart to slip his tongue inside, tasting eggnog and Christmas cookies.

He smiled into it, eyes going half-lidded and walking Yibo backwards until he fell into the couch cushions.

A small meow interrupted their make-out session and Xiao Zhan stroked Yibo’s cheek, looking at him for a long time, getting lost in his eyes. Another demanding meow made them both start giggling.

‘I guess she has to get used to it, ah?’ Xiao Zhan said eventually and prompted Yibo to snort.

‘She’ll get a nice treat every time we’re ah.. busy and have to leave her alone in the laundry for a bit.’

He giggled cheekily while Xiao Zhan chuckled. ‘She’ll be chonky in no time!’

Yibo shrugged. ‘We’ll still love her!’

Xiao Zhan nodded, but became serious and stroked along Yibo’s temple, feeling a certain way.

‘Thank you,’ he whispered, feeling the tears well up again and blinking them away. ‘From the bottom of my heart, Yibo. Thank you.’

Yibo smiled genuinely and wiped away the wetness in the corners of his eyes.

‘You’re welcome. It was time.’

‘It was,’ Xiao Zhan agreed.

‘You said you have more gifts for me, ge?’ Yibo asked tentatively, smirking like a little gremlin and Xiao Zhan huffed. ‘I have. I’ll get them.’

‘And I’ll get mine!’ Yibo replied, making Xiao Zhan startle.

‘You too?’

‘Of course!’

They smiled at each other goofily, until Jianguo knocked her head against Xiao Zhan’s ankle, demanding head scratches and receiving them.

Only after the little princess was satisfied did Xiao Zhan go upstairs to fetch his promised gifts.

He handed Yibo the portrait first, watching with a beating heart as Yibo unpacked it slowly, an almost reverent expression on his face.

Once he took in the picture Xiao Zhan had painted for him, his eyes became wet again and he was visibly touched.

‘Is that us?’ he asked in a small voice and swallowed heavily, pointing at the two figures.

‘Mn,’ Xiao Zhan agreed and wrapped an arm around Yibo’s shoulders.

‘Remember the beach portrait commission? You were asking if I was painting you and I dismissed it. But… I wasn’t quite honest. I already had you on my mind back then and maybe there was a little of you in it? I thought I needed to do it properly, though. So yes, this is you, walking along the beach. There’s a skateboard next to you. Something you love. And this is me, painting. We’re together, doing something we love.’

‘That’s… it’s beautiful, ge. I love it so much! Let’s hang it up later, yes?’

Xiao Zhan chuckled at Yibo’s enthusiasm. ‘Of course! We’ll hang it up in the bedroom.’

Next, he fished the little jewelry box out of his pocket and put it into Yibo’s hands, looking at him with nothing but love in his eyes.

‘That’s my second gift. Open it.’

Yibo nodded mutely, bottom lip trembling, and opening the little box. Inside, he found a delicate silver bone necklace with his initials on it.

‘Ohhh!’ Yibo exclaimed and carefully examined it.

‘It’s a little bone for my gouzaizai. I’ve designed it myself,’ Xiao Zhan explained. ‘Do you like it? I thought it fit you very well. And you’ll have a part of me with you, even when I am not physically by your side.’

‘Help me put it on?’ Yibo asked in a broken voice, eyes red and visibly emotional. Xiao Zhan nodded as his heart swelled in his chest.

‘I’ll wear it always,’ Yibo announced seriously and brought the small bone up to his lips. ‘Thank you Zhan-ge, you make me so happy. I love you so much!’

‘I’m glad you like it! You said you had something for me too?’

Yibo grinned and lowered his lashes shyly, fiddling with a flat box next to him.

‘Yeah, but it’s not as nice as yours…’

‘Aiya, I doubt that,’ Xiao Zhan chided him gently and leaned in to give Yibo a sweet, lingering kiss. ‘It’s from you. I already love it!’

Yibo choked out a wet laugh, then gave him a flat stare. ‘You’re so cheesy, ge!’

‘Well, it’s the perfect time to be cheesy. Shut up!’

Yibo cackled, but held the box out to him. ‘Here, I made it as well. Felix showed me how to do it. But I made this one all by myself!’

Curiously, Xiao Zhan opened the gift box.

When he saw the red bracelet, an impossibly bright smile lit up his features, and he held it up to examine properly.

‘Yibo, that’s gorgeous! You did it all by yourself?’

‘Mn,’ Yibo said and sat up a little straighter. ‘I braided it and picked the charms. Can you see? One’s a peony, that’s me. And the other is a sunflower, that’s you. Because you’re beautiful and bright and glorious-’

‘I love you so, so much!’ Xiao Zhan exclaimed, touched beyond belief and needing a cry again, so he clutched at Yibo and locked their lips in a passionate, fiery kiss that even Jianguo’s meowing couldn’t interrupt.

Such was the power of love.

After they made sure Jianguo had everything she needed and was settled for the night, Xiao Zhan and Wang Yibo got ready for bed themselves, brushing their teeth together in front of the bathroom mirror and stealing small glimpses, both feeling how special this day had been.

When they were in bed, all cuddled up and cozy, staring at the portrait on the wall, next to where Yibo had hung the chibi doodles Xiao Zhan had drawn for him, it finally settled in that this was their life now. Xiao Zhan felt homey, content, and excited about the future. Nothing scared him anymore, with Wang Yibo by his side.

‘I love you,’ he whispered into the boy’s ear and kissed his temple.

‘I love you,’ Yibo whispered back, turned around and switched off the nightlight.

The End