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the wrong side

Chapter 14

Summary:

If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it's yours.

Notes:

Ty for coming on this journey with me. I had no idea it would go this far but I'm glad it did <3

(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)

Chapter Text

the wrong side by infinite galaxies photo grid collage; image of hand reaching for 3 organge monarch butterflies, image of white man's back facing camera, hugging a smaller white woman, image of two white men's hands touching at pinky, image of woman in low-cut black spaghetti strap dress, image of men's arms cuddling in bed, image of white woman touching a touch man's brow while laying in bed, image of white man kissing a white woman's shoulder, quote image isn't it amazing how people can feel like home, image of white woman's laying in bed, her extended neck facing camera

 

Ben entered the room, half terrified she’d already be on the other side of the door, half hoping she wouldn’t be. He just needed a few minutes alone. To his relief, the room was quiet, and he’d have a chance to brace himself for what was to come.

 

He immediately pulled his toothbrush and toothpaste out of his bag, figuring it might energize him, give him something to do with his mouth and hands other than bite his nails or chew the inside of his cheek. 


Once his mouth was minty fresh, he slid his jacket off and hung it on the back of the desk chair, smoothing his tie over his chest. It would be presumptuous to start undressing and a little embarrassing if she or Kylo changed their minds and just decided to catch up as friends instead.

 

Should they just catch up as friends? Shouldn’t they be more mature and thoughtful than just falling back into bed after ten years apart?

 

He also knew he should probably count himself extremely lucky that he’d even get to be inside her again, feel the touch of her skin, her perfect mouth. 

 

But could he enjoy it if it were temporary, though? What if she didn’t get that job? Or worse, what if she chose not to take it?

 

As his thoughts collided like a twenty-car pileup, he heard the beep of a keycard in the lock. 

 

Kylo’s large, black-clad form passed through the doorway, and he shut the door gently behind him before turning around. 

 

His grin quickly faded as his eyes met Ben’s.

 

“My guy, are you alright? You look like you’re about to cry.”

 

Ben blinked in response and was relieved to find no tears had formed yet. “No, I-uh, I was just wondering if this is even a good idea.”

 

Kylo pressed his lips together and placed his hands on his hips. “Shit. Yeah, I know. It’s uh-”

 

“Stupid? Reckless? Ill-advised?”

 

“It’s her , man,” Kylo interjected, throwing his hands forward, gesticulating passionately as he was wont to do. “Are you really gonna tell her no ?”

 

“Maybe, I don’t know?” Ben wondered aloud. “Like, I want to so badly, you have no idea. I’ve dreamed about this for years. But-”

 

“But it hurts.”

 

“Yeah. It’s gonna devastate me if she leaves again. Like, I’ve already spent years trying and failing to find someone else who even comes close. To forget her.”

 

“It’s gonna hurt whether we have sex with her or not, right?” Kylo’s optimism was borderline amusing. 

 

Ben laughed softly. “Yeah, you may have a fucked up little point there.”

 

Before he could offer another counterpoint or argue that she might not even show up, the door’s lock beeped once more.

 

She was here.

 

With her suitcase.

 

Ben and Kylo stared at the black rolling bag as she wheeled it towards the nightstand and compressed the handle before turning to face them.

 

“What? Do you think I’m gonna be able to walk out of here after we do this? I’m not eighteen anymore.”

 

Kylo laughed heartily. “Yeah, okay.”

 

Ben’s eyes traced the silhouette of the bag and then traveled to Rey’s heels and up her legs, over her tight dress, and then finally up to her beautiful face. She had brought her bag. She wanted more time, just like they did. It was something, at least. 

 

“Are you sure about this?” Ben asked because he couldn’t help but self-sabotage when he was close to getting something he truly wanted.

 

“Are you guys sure about this?” She retorted, hands on her hips. 

 

“I am very sure,” Kylo blurted out. “No reluctance from me. You want a drink?”

 

“Maybe some water?” she considered. “Ben, are you okay?” she toed off her heels and left them by the door, padding towards him, now a few inches shorter, as she stared up at him. The angle of his neck adjusted accordingly. 

 

“I think I’m alright,” he replied, his voice quiet as he studied every curve and hollow of her face, the tiny, emergent crows-feet, the extra freckles that had accumulated over the years. 

 

She placed her palms on his chest for a moment before reaching up on her tiptoes to kiss him, just a gentle, exploratory press of her lips. “I missed you so much.”

 

“You have no idea,” he breathed, closing his fists around her wrists, holding them steady, his heart drumming under her hands. His breath quickened with all he wanted to say.

 

He wanted to confess exactly how he felt about her, get down on his knees, and beg her to stay, but he also didn’t want to scare her away, though he couldn’t promise himself he wouldn’t do it anyway before the night was over. Even if it did send her running, at least she would know the truth: that they’d never stopped loving her. That they never would.

 

Kylo returned from the sink, handing her a half-filled glass of water. She accepted it with a smile and took a slow sip, observing how Kylo hovered close to Ben, their arms touching. How Ben grazed the side of Kylo’s thigh with his pinky, something he did in public to feel close to him and to ground himself when he was nervous.

 

“You two are still-” she started, and they both nodded, earning a broad grin from her. Kylo stroked the side of Ben’s hand with his pinky in recognition, like he always did. 

 

“That makes me really, really happy,” she added. 

 

Ben wanted to share how much happier he would be if she was still with them and how he’d never wanted anything more, especially at this moment, when happily ever after was so close he could taste it. Either that or it was just more sand about to slip through his fingers.

 

“I just have one question before we start,” she spoke steadily, grasping her glass in both hands, her pink lips shiny with the recent sip. 

 

“Is this just sex to you?”

 

Ben shook his head no immediately and couldn’t form words because he might never stop talking. 

 

Like always, Kylo managed to speak for him, however succinctly. “It was never just sex, Rey. I think you know that.”

 

“Yeah,” she replied. “You’re right. I just needed to hear it.” With a small, satisfied smile, she placed her glass on the nearby dresser. She stood before them, her face so hopeful, and tucked a thumb under one of her spaghetti straps, slowly slipping it off. “Make me feel good,” she echoed the same words she’d used long ago. “Please.” 

 

She reached for each of their neckties and pulled them closer, letting them kiss each side of her neck. They wrapped their hands around her waist until their fingers touched. Kylo interlinked his with Bens, and together they pulled her closer, taking turns kissing her deeply and kissing each other. 

 

Rey reached up to loosen Ben’s tie as Kylo moved behind her to shimmy her dress up past her hips. Ben began unfastening his buttons as she pulled the tie off his neck and slipped her hands beneath the fabric to slide his shirt off his shoulders. 

 

“No undershirt? Slutty ,” she giggled as she stroked his now bare skin, tracing her fingers down his torso until he thought he might explode. 

 

Kylo kissed the soft juncture of her neck and shoulder, and she let her head fall back as Ben watched the slow show of her coming undone.

 

“No bra? Sluttier,” Kylo joked, yanking the collar of her dress down as Ben took in the beautiful sight of her perfect breasts, the nipples he’d memorized with his tongue. He bent down and wrapped his lips around one, then the other, his memory serving him right. Kylo pressed her between his and Ben’s bodies as Ben rose up to kiss him again over her head.

 

“You two need to keep up in the nudity department,” she laughed, her breath warm on his chest as she reached between them to grapple with Ben’s belt buckle. 

 

“Not yet,” Ben replied, falling to his knees to stare up at her, his face now even with the delicate, lacy scrap barely covering her sex. Ben cupped her calf and held it aloft, kissing his way up her shin, then her knee before placing her foot back on the floor. He wanted to worship every inch of her, yet his sense of urgency prevented him from slowing down. 

 

Kylo unbuttoned his shirt and tossed it aside before turning to face them both. He then dropped to his knees beside Ben as they both stared up at her in awe. 

 

“Look at you two,” she remarked, eyes shining. “God, I missed this.” She ruffled both of their manes, and their necks turned to follow her as she stepped gingerly between them and walked towards the bed, sitting down to test the mattress. She leaned back on her elbows, beckoning them with a curled finger. Her dress was more like a belt now, gathered around her waist, the loose straps draped at her elbows like ribbons on a gift. 

 

Kylo glanced over at Ben, who nodded, and they both crawled towards her, kneeling before the bed. They each grasped one leg and spread them apart as they kissed their way up her inner thighs. She coiled her fingers in their hair, urging them on, slowly falling backward as they made their way closer to her center. 

 

Her skin was baby-soft, and her scent was heavenly, prolonging his intoxicated feeling. Though, honestly, the whiskey had already begun to wear off as soon as he came upstairs, worried to death about what was to come. But now, here in the sacred cradle of her body, surrounded by her delicate lavender-scented skin, he thought of nothing else but how to make her come and be inside her as quickly as possible. 

 

Each brother grasped the thin strings stretched tautly over her hipbones and pulled them down until she bent her knees and let them slip her panties off, one leg at a time. She was spread wide and glistening with arousal, pink and pretty and perfect, just like he remembered. His tongue spoke for him where words failed, licking a soft stripe along the crease of her thigh as Kylo did the same. His cheek met his brother’s as they licked and nibbled and gave each other a turn to dip into the sweet, honeyed center of her. 

 

“Fuck, feels so good,” she moaned, the sound instantly tightening his pants, testing the seams. 

 

Ben fumbled with his belt buckle, resting his cheek against her thigh, and welcomed Kylo’s kiss as he successfully pulled his own zipper down. 

 

Kylo backed away and let him continue to pleasure Rey with his mouth. Soon, he could hear the sound of Kylo’s pants hitting the floor before his brother kneeled behind him. 

 

“Look at you two. Got me so fucking turned on,’ Kylo remarked. Ben relished the feeling of strong hands stroking down his back and sliding into the front of his pants before finally shifting them down to his knees along with his boxer briefs. 

 

As he renewed his dedication to eliciting more delicious sounds from Rey’s mouth, his brother dedicated himself to making Ben do the same. Kylo’s tongue was warm and wet, making him shiver as it traced a circle around his tight hole. Kylo reached between Ben’s legs to grasp his shaft, stroking it downward in steady movements, increasing Ben’s neediness to fuck and be fucked. 

 

“Don’t stop,” Rey urged Ben on as he inserted two fingers into her soaked cunt, marveling at all he remembered about what she liked, how fast he always used to make her come. Some things never changed, and he couldn’t help but smirk as she unraveled. “Fuck, please don’t stop!” she cried again, grasping her own breasts, teasing her own nipples by threading them through her delicate fingers. 

 

Ben silently acquiesced by moving his tongue even faster, his own pleasure starting to make him feel weak and desperate, yet wanting to draw it out for as long as possible. 

 

“That’s it, good girl, come for us,” Kylo urged her as he rose up, grasping Ben’s hips with both hands and bent forward to place gentle kisses along his spine. “Lube. Where is it?” Kylo whispered in Ben’s ear, sending an anticipatory shiver through his whole body.

 

“My duffel. Side pocket,” Ben quickly spoke over his shoulder, replacing his tongue with the flats of his fingers, working Rey into even more of a whimpering puddle. “And the pocket of your bag, I think, unless you moved it.”

 

“You gonna come? Huh?” Ben asked with deep interest as he returned to his task, keeping his eyes locked on hers before caressing her clit with his pointed tongue. As she bucked her hips, he began sucking steadily on it, fingers rapidly thrusting against her front wall. 

 

She wailed her release, her whole body shuddering, thighs clamping around his head as she tried to simultaneously shove it away. Kylo sauntered back over and tossed the lube on the bed. “Damn, you were always so responsive. Beautiful girl.”

 

“Fuck, I forgot how good that can be,” she declared, tossing an arm over her eyes as Ben rose slightly, kicking off his pants completely before settling himself between her legs again, this time kissing a path between her breasts, nuzzling his nose there as she looped her arms around his neck.

 

“Me too,” Ben agreed, not remembering the last time he’d enjoyed that so much. 

 

“You wanna fuck me, Ben?” she asked hopefully. Without missing a beat, he nodded dutifully and grasped himself as she wrapped her legs around his waist. 

 

Sex with both of them had always felt effortless, or at least it was once they’d learned what positions they each preferred and the myriad permutations thereof. 

 

They were currently aligned for one of their favorites, and the one they’d all agreed was the most romantic because they could all kiss each other whenever they wanted, and it made them feel so close. The fact that she’d asked for this now hadn’t escaped him as he notched himself at her willing entrance and a little too hastily pressed inside, eliciting a shocked oh from her.  

 

“Sorry, just excited,” he apologized, his voice strained from keeping himself aloft over her body and also trying not to blow his load too soon.

 

“It’s okay, I’m really wet,” she reassured him. “Just sensitive and full.” She reached up and stroked his face, and he kissed her with all his might, with all the love he’d held inside for years. He dug his toes into the carpet for leverage until he was fully seated inside her. As Kylo pushed inside of him just the same, he went impossibly deeper inside Rey, and they both whined with pleasure into each other's mouths. He could feel Rey reach behind him to caress Kylo’s cheek, his brother's breath so warm in his ear, his grunts reverberating through Ben’s core.

 

“Told you this dress would look better like this,” Kylo laughed darkly as he slowly pulled out and pushed back in. Ben buried his face in Rey’s neck, overcome with pleasurable closeness, with filling and being filled. Nothing could ever compare to this. Nothing, ever. 

 

He and Kylo had long ago agreed it would never feel right with anyone but her, and they’d never dared to even try it with someone else. It was so worth the excruciating wait. 

 

“As usual, you’re right,” Rey sighed dreamily as Kylo leaned forward to kiss her over Ben’s shoulder. When they parted, Ben craned his neck to peer back at his brother, who greeted him with another kiss.

 

 “I love you both so fuckin’ much,” Kylo declared, his breath heavy. 

 

“Me too,” Rey and Ben replied at the same time. 

 

There were no doubts here, in this warm cocoon, in the temple created by their bodies. There was no wondering if this was right or not, just like you would never look at the sky and wonder if it was truly blue. 

 

The sky would always be blue, and they would always be in love.

 

It was pure bliss when he came, though far too soon, and Kylo followed soon after, roaring as he held them all together with his powerful body until they both collapsed onto the bed in sated exhaustion.  

 

“I can’t wait to get this dress off,” Rey declared as she stood up on shaky legs, attempting to straighten it out enough to get at the zipper. Kylo stepped in, his thick fingers managing the tiny pull well enough to get it halfway down before she could slip the whole thing down her slender legs. 

 

She folded one arm across her abdomen to hold her opposite elbow, and Ben just started to notice a tattoo emblazoned across her ribcage, over her heart.

 

“What’s this?” he asked curiously, tenderly grasping her bicep to move it aside. 

 

“Oh,” she laughed nervously. “It’s something I got not long after I moved. It’s silly.”

 

Kylo circled her to stand by Ben’s side and take a look for himself. “Butterflies, huh?”

 

“It’s, um- It’s us,” she answered quietly. “Ben,” she said as she touched the blue one with the tip of her finger, “Kylo,” she continued as she tapped a similarly-sized red one. “And me,” she finished, lingering on a smaller purple butterfly. 

 

“It’s not-” Ben choked a little, a sob forming. “It’s not silly at all,” he managed to finish. 

 

Kylo kissed her cheek and folded his arms around her, and Ben rose off the bed to press himself to her back, Kylo’s hands moving to circle his ribcage. They stood for a few moments, just holding her, their little Rey sandwich, taking turns kissing the top of her head and each other.

 

Ben considered crying more but thought better of it. He wondered, instead, if it were possible to hold onto this feeling of pure, unadulterated happiness forever. 

 

She hadn’t forgotten them after all. Not only had she not moved on, she’d carried them over her heart the entire time they’d been apart. He knew she had her reasons for leaving and staying gone so long as she built her career, and he’d listen to as much as she was willing to tell them for as long as she wanted. But the most important thing was they’d let her fly, and she’d chosen to return. Her freedom to leave this place where she’d suffered so much in order to pursue her passion and find herself ended up being the thing that had ultimately led her back here, into their arms. It had always been the right choice, and it would always be worth it.

 

“I forgot what it felt like to be Solo-smothered,” she giggled, her voice muffled between them.

 

“Sorry,” Ben backed away sheepishly, raising his hands in supplication as Kylo released her from his grasp as well.

 

“No, it’s okay. I missed it,” she confirmed. “It’s a good thing. The best, actually. You hold me just tightly enough.” She bounced on her heels a bit, her eyes alight with joy. “Anyway, there’s cum leaking everywhere, and I think a shower would be pretty fucking amazing right now, don’t you.”

 

“Yeah, agreed,” Ben laughed, grasping her hand to lead her to the bathroom just as she grabbed Kylo’s, and they walked in a joined line to the ensuite.

 

Under the warm spray of the water, their slippery bodies mingled in a tight circle as they took turns sudsing and scrubbing each other, kissing and laughing. Wrapped in fluffy, dry towels, they brushed their teeth, smiled at each other in the mirror, and playfully splashed each other with water from the tap. In the big king-sized bed, they made a warm cocoon under the sheets, and Rey snuggled between them. 

 

“I’ve been so lonely for so long,” she whispered in the darkness once it had been quiet for a while.

 

“Me too,” Ben and Kylo whispered back. 

 

The darkness had brought with it a peaceful stillness. It was that liminal state between wakefulness and sleeping that made you want to talk more. To be honest.

 

“Can I say something a little unhinged?” Rey said quietly.

 

“You wanna go again? I mean, I’m kinda worn out, but I’m not gonna say no –” Kylo started.

 

“No,” she giggled. “I need three to five business days to recover and probably a heating pad for my lower back.”

 

Ben braced himself for what she might say. That this had been fun, but she really missed Naboo and hoped they could still have phone sex once in a while. That she was actually engaged after all and just needed to be with them one last time before she settled down. However, nothing could have prepared him for what she said next.

 

“I know we can’t, like, get married, but maybe we can have something close to it?” she started, and Ben’s heart threatened to leap out of his chest as he lay beside her, every muscle in his body tensed as his throat closed up and tears sprung to his eyes. “I never dreamed of being like a traditional wife or a mom or anything like that. Just being loved is enough for me. More than I ever had in my life, really. And being here with you now, I just want you to know that I never stopped loving both of you. No one I’ve met since has compared to what I have with you. I missed you both so fucking much, and I just can’t imagine my life with anyone else, no matter the cost.”

 

“Fuck,” Ben choked out accidentally, crying suddenly against his will. 

 

She sat up, her towel falling away from her torso, her half-dried hair haloed by the small sliver of light that came in from the hall outside their door. 

 

“Is that bad?” she fretted, lovingly stroking the hair away from his forehead. 

 

Kylo shot up on the other side of her, speechless for once, his eyes searching Ben’s over her shoulder. 

 

For once, Ben would have to be the one to find the words. 

 

He sat up slowly, reaching for her hand and placing it in his lap, pressing his lips together as his nose prickled and his eyes flooded. 

 

“No, it’s not bad,” he started. “It’s everything I’ve wanted to hear you say since the night the three of us came together. I mean, I’ve wanted you ever since you came into my life period , and then you upended everything I’d ever known about myself. Not just how I’d robbed myself of making friends or falling in love, but of who I am and what I wanted out of life–.”

 

“Ben-” she said softly, reaching up with her free hand to thumb a tear off his cheek.

 

“When you left, I was devastated, but I understood why, and I didn’t blame you. Knowing you were happy and getting to be free and live the life you’d worked so hard for made it a little easier to deal with. But Rey-”

 

Now tears were streaming down her face. Kylo rested his chin on her shoulder and closed his eyes against his tears, grasping her waist for comfort.

 

He had to continue. If there was a chance this was forever, he needed her to know it was real and true and that it was worth whatever sacrifices she might need to make in order to come back to them. 

 

“We’ve never stopped loving you. I’m terrified that the three of us will never get to have the life we want together, but hearing you say it gives me so much hope. That you even want it means so fucking much–” 

 

He couldn’t continue. It was so fucking much. He wanted to sob. He wanted to wail. Not from grief but from relief . The shedding of ten years of fears leaving his body was almost painful until love filled in the cracks like lava, cooling and solidifying into a determined resolve. Without having to ask, with one look, he knew his brother felt the same.

 

“If you want us, you have us, Rey. Always.”

 

Relieved laughter rang from her lips like church bells, clear and true, resounding with hope. With her eyes filled with joy, she grasped Ben’s face with both hands, pulling him close for a kiss. He held her face in return, and sand turned to solid earth, the clay from which they might finally build a life together. 

 

She turned back to Kylo, who kissed her tenderly as well, and let her brush away his tears with the soft pads of her fingers. “What he said,” he whispered as their lips parted and they pressed their foreheads together. 

 

“Good,” she replied softly. “Very good.”

 

🧍🏻‍♂️❤️🧍🏻‍♀️❤️🧍🏻‍♂️

 

When they woke up in the morning, she was still there. 

 

Sunday was spent in bed.

 

On Monday, they waited for news and then clinked champagne glasses at Ben’s apartment.

 

On Tuesday, she went back to Naboo to close that chapter in her life.

 

One month later, a new chapter began, a story they would write side by side together, one that had never been told and that only they could tell. They would fill many pages for their eyes only, building a life that only needed to make sense to them.  

 

Each night, in their shared bed, with Rey between them, Ben often dreamt of them as butterflies. 

 

This time, they flew happily in a garden of their own making, filled with light and color and life, with no end in sight.

Notes:

i hope you all find your happy endings too <3

Notes:

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