Chapter Text
Blood, so much blood, coats the ground as bodies, still and quiet, lie strewn across the dirty floor. Spells fly overhead as manic laughter echoes in his ears. The burning of his flesh stings his nose as the black mark on his arm darkens. Severus looked around at the carnage; faces he hadn't seen in years lay across the floor, arms and legs missing, sliver appendages gripping the throats or crushing the limbs within reach of their owners, seemingly killing them. Severus looks up at the ruined shell of Godric’s Hollow, walls and part of the roof caved in and missing. He walks through the house, his eyes catching a glimpse of his reflection in the broken mirror; his adult self stares back at him before his eyes land on the ground. James Potter’s body lays, his eyes glossed over, staring into nothing. Severus sneers as he kicks the body; a light smirk fades onto his face as distant cries echo through the house; Severus’s head snaps toward the sound as he races up the stairs. Pushing the broken door inwards, he drops to his knees. A young body lies, fiery red hair and green eyes stare at the doorway, seemingly into Severus’s soul. He crawls over, taking the child body of Lily Potter into his arms as tears roll down his face.
You failed. You couldn't save her. And with your meddling, you killed her before she was supposed to. Now the Wizarding World is doomed, and IT’S ALL YOUR FAULT.
Severus’s head snaps up from his desk, his heart beating erratically. He looks around with wide and panicked eyes before they land on his mirror; child features stare back at him; he runs his hand down his face before pinching his cheek. Hot, stinging pain flashes through it, causing him to release it. Rubbing his cheek, he stares out the small window above the desk; the sun has fallen below the hills of Cokeworth as a few stars blink through the coal-filled pollution. He sighs as he closes his eyes, allowing his hand the drop into his lap. Echoes of his nightmare ring through his head as he opens them.
‘ No, I won't allow that future to come to pass,’ he thinks as he picks up the fallen pencil from the ground, placing it next to the open notebook. His eyes filled with determination as he shielded his mind with occlumency, pushing his fears from the nightmare beyond his walls.
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Days turn into weeks as September first arches closer. Severus spent his days writing, reading his mother’s old textbooks, and searching the nearby woods for any potion ingredients he could use. Spending time with Lily felt uncomfortable as an adult man playing with a child, but he tried to keep the friendship going; he powered through, allowing himself to let go of his worries for a while and become a child again. Looking through his mother’s trunk, Severus found a small pouch of galleons in a hidden compartment at the bottom. Taking the bag, he held a few coins to the small candle and inspected them. A small smile crept onto his face; Severus closed the truck, dropped the golden pieces back into the pouch, and gently touched the inscribed initials ‘E. P’ on the old, worn gold plate before he snuck out of his parent's bedroom, the bag tucked quietly under his clothes.
His mother sat quietly in the kitchen with a folded note, worry plastered upon her face, her nails bitten short from worry. “Mother?” Severus asks; his mother glances up, dropping the letter in surprise. Coming over to the table, Severus picks up the note and starts to read. “Is this my Hogwarts letter? Why would you try and keep this from me?” he asks quietly, as this never happened the first time. Before his mother quietly slipped into his room and informed him that they would shop for school supplies soon, and that was it. They went to Diagon Alley and got what they could before making up the rest with his mother’s old things, but she seemed like she was trying to hide his letter from him this time, the letter he's been waiting weeks for. He slips the note into his pocket and turns away, the rage bubbling up in the pit of his stomach. “I don't know what you thought you were doing, and I don't care to, but if you believe you're keeping me from escaping this bloody place, you lost the plot,” Severus said calmly, his voice cold from rage. He stomps toward the rickety, old ladder and climbs up it, leaving his mother gobsmacked in the kitchen.
Placing the letter on the table, he takes a deep breath, calming the anger pooling within him. He flips through it, marking the books he'll need to buy with the galleons he found in his mother’s trunk. Before, his mother apparated them to the Leaky Cauldron and went through the muggle entrance, but London was so far away from Cokeworth that he couldn't get there without his mother’s help. He opened his notebook to a fresh page and, at the top, wrote ‘How to get to London without magic and muggle money?’ and circled it. Bitting the eraser end of his pencil, he wrote down a few ideas. ‘ Maybe the Evans? If I ask, they might be able to take me. But then again, they might be busy getting Lily’s school supplies, so they might not have time.’ he crosses it out before his brain lights up; the Knight Bus, all he had to do was point a wand in front of him, and it would appear. It was perfect. With a smile, he wrote it down and crossed three lines under it; next to it, he wrote down a date that both parents would be out of the house and closed the notebook. This trip was going to be fun.
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Sitting outside in the middle of summer in Cokeworth in a worn-out turtleneck sweater and an old pair of black jeans may not have been Severus's best idea, but at least he was comfortable. With the bag of galleons tied to one of his belt loops and his mother’s wand in his back pocket covered by the back of his sweater, he takes a deep breath before glancing around for anyone. Seeing no one, he pulls out the wand and points it in front of him; sudden wind flings his hair around his face as the Knight Bus comes to a screeching stop, tires burning on the old cement. The doors slide open as a young boy in a conductor uniform tips his hat to Severus.
“Welcome to the Knight Bus, emergency transport for the stranded witch or wizard; just stick out your wand hand, step on board, and we can take you anywhere you want to go. My name is Alatar Ellesmere, and I will be your conductor this morning.” the young man said. He had mid-length black hair, greenish-blue eyes, was tall but lean, and had a heavy posh accent. ‘ Must have been a pureblood.’ Severus thinks as he climbs on board. “Where will you be going this morning?” Alatar asked as he casually leaned on one of the metal poles in the bus. “The Leaky Cauldron,” Severus said, his voice clear and direct. Alatar nodded as the owlish driver of Ernest Prang pulled out of the street and raced off. As the bus swerved, many objects magically jumped out of the way of the speeding bus. Severus held onto the metal pole before him as his knuckles turned white to stop him from sliding to the ground. The bus comes screeching to a stop causing Severus to fly forward almost out of his seat if not for the quick hands of Alatar. With a polite thanks, he stands on unsteady legs as he climbs down the steps in front of the Leaky Cauldron, a little green in the face. With a polite wave from Alatar, the doors slide shut, and the Knight Bus disappears in a flash of wind.
Severus shakily walks through the door of the small bar and to the counter. Carefully placing his Hogwarts acceptance letter in front of the bartender, Tom, with a slight nod. Glancing down at the letter, Tom places the dishrag on the counter and motions for someone to take over before leading Severus to the back of the bar. With a quick tap of his wand, the wall slides up, revealing the noise of Diagon Alley hidden behind it. Severus nods to Tom before passing through and into the noise that was Diagon Alley.