Chapter Text
Charlie left his philosophy lecture with his phone burning a hole in his pocket. He hadn’t heard from Nick in a few hours, and though he knew that Nick had classes, he still itched to hear from his… boyfriend? Person that he is seeing who is still in the closet? A fact that Tao had brought up thrice the night before. Charlie made it three steps into the hall before he reached into his front pocket and pulled out his phone. He clicks the device on, only to see the screen devoid of any notifications. He sighs dejectedly and slips the phone back into his pocket, bracing himself against the cold as he waits for his bus. Charlie is grateful that the bus is on time, for once. The chill November air settles over his bones, the wind cutting through his layers. He steps on the bus, flashing his student pass at the driver before moving to stand at the back. Charlie leans against a pole and puts his headphones on, the opening chords of Midnight Show by the Killers blaring, drowning out the chatter of the other commuters around him. He watches the city blur by in shades of brown and gray, winter leeching all color from the world.
Charlie pulls the cord as his stop approaches and shuffles to the door, shouting “Thank you!” to the driver, and books it to the main doors of his building, sighing when the dry heat of the lobby swirls around him. He avoids looking at his phone on the elevator ride to his floor, methodically unlocking the door and letting himself into the darkened apartment. Tao and Elle were still out, so Charlie took advantage of the quiet to have a hot bath, willing warmth back into his bones. He lights a few of the candles that Elle keeps around for this purpose, keeping the lights off, allowing the room to be filled with a golden, flickering glow. The lovely scent of rose and bergamot fills the room as Charlie drops one of his outrageously expensive bath bombs into the steaming water. He connects his phone to a small wireless speaker, low-fi beats thrumming through the enclosed space as Charlie eases himself into the tub. He closes his eyes as he lets the delicious heat wrap around him, letting out a small hum of satisfaction. He doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to Canadian winters and is thankful he lives in a flat with a bathtub.
After thirty minutes of soaking, Charlie rises from the tub, water sluicing off him as he grabs his towel and wraps it around his waist. He grabs his phone, heart jumping at an Instagram notification, only to sink when he sees that it’s his group chat with Tao and Elle, informing him that they are studying at a cafe and won’t be home for a few more hours. Charlie dries himself off in the semi darkness before flicking on the lights and going through his skincare routine. He takes extra care in the steps, using his jade roller to rub his serum into his skin, the cool stone a juxtaposition to the steam that still hangs heavy in the air. Charlie dons a pair of sweats and an oversized jumper before extinguishing the candles and pads to his room. The sun has already disappeared, the sky darkening into a deep indigo. Charlie grabs his textbooks and laptop, making himself comfortable on the sofa with a cup of tea and Spotify playing quietly in the background.
Charlie is jolted out of his analysis of Swann’s Way by a frantic hammering on the apartment door. He frowns, not expecting any guests. He vaguely wonders if Tao or Elle lost their keys as he shifts his books and computer off of him and makes his way to the door. The pounding continues and Charlie rolls his eyes.
“I’m coming,” he grumbles, turning the deadbolt and releasing the chain. Charlie opens the door a foot to see a shivering Nick Nelson standing in the hallway.
“Hi,” Nick says, cheeks burned red from the unforgiving November wind.
“How’d you get in the main building?” Charlie asks in lieu of a greeting.
“Delivery driver let me in. I’m pretty sure he was stoned,” Nick shrugs, hands in his jacket pocket.
“Come in, then,” Charlie opens the door wider, standing aside to let Nick in.
Nick huffs warm air into his hands as he toes off his Vans, “sorry for not texting you today, I had… a day.”
“It’s okay,” Charlie shrugs, as if he wasn’t stressing over the sudden lack of messages. It’s only been a few days, and he knows that Nick is busy with school and hockey. “Everything okay?” Charlie walks to the kitchen, filling the kettle and turning it on before grabbing two mugs. He busies himself with preparing the tea, sensing Nick leaning against the refrigerator behind him.
“I– it was a weird morning. My classmate and friend, Darcy, was grilling me about my weekend…” Nick trailed off, breathing deep.
The kettle whistled and Charlie poured the boiling water into the mugs, adding a splash of milk and honey before turning to Nick. “How do you take your tea?”
“Erm, I’ve never actually had tea. I’m more of a coffee drinker?” Charlie’s surprise must be written on his face but Nick doesn’t say anything.
“Milk and honey it is, then,” Charlie fixes the second cup and gestures for Nick to follow him into the living room, setting the mugs down on the coffee table and clearing away his books and computer. “So what’s up? Darcy asked about your weekend?”
“Yeah. I let slip that I went on a date and she kept pressing asking about her, and I… I told her it was a he .” Nick was rubbing the back of his neck with his hand, looking at Charlie with wide eyes and a grimace.
“And how are you feeling about that?” Charlie asks, noting Nick’s discomfort. Charlie reached out to Nick, taking a hand in his, scooting closer.
“Scared? Relieved? Darcy said she wouldn’t say anything, but it felt nice to talk to someone?” Nick squeezes Charlie’s hand, inhaling deeply. “It felt great to talk about our dates and the fun I've had.”
“I’m so proud of you, Nick!” Charlie says, leaning in to wrap Nick in a hug. He buries his face in Nick’s neck, breathing in the smell of cold and cologne. Charlie feels Nick relax into his embrace and they remain there for a few more seconds. Charlie pulls back and cups Nick’s cheek with his hand, his rough stubble tickling his palm. “You get to come out on your own terms, and the fact that you felt safe enough with Darcy to tell her is incredible.”
“It helps that Darce is a lesbian and talks about her girlfriend all the time,” Nick chuckles.
“Darcy Olsson?” Charlie asks, the name finally ringing a bell.
“Yeah?”
“Oh I know her from the LGBTQIA society! She’s a wonderful spitfire!” Darcy was wild and chaotic, but she is also insightful and a great listener. She instantly made Charlie feel welcome when he tentatively walked into the first meeting in September, listening to his fears of studying in a foreign country, and then going out of her way to invite him out. Charlie is glad that Nick has someone like Darcy to talk to.
“Spitfire is an understatement,” Nick chuckles. “She’s going to make a great elementary school teacher. It’s crazy that you know Darcy. Small world, huh?”
“I mean, this city is small in comparison to London,” Charlie jokes, poking Nick on his bicep. Nick grabs Charlie’s finger and brings it to his lips, brushing a small kiss over the knuckle. Charlie shivers, feeling electricity crackle down the length of his arm before settling deep in his core. Before either man could say anything, the door to the apartment opened, Elle and Tao emerging through the threshold.
“Charlie, dearest, we’re home!” Elle chirps. Charlie feels Nick drop his hand and put a more respectable distance between them. Charlie tries not to let that sting, schooling his face. He hopes Nick won't see the hurt in his eyes.
“In here,” Charlie shouts. The couple appears around the corner, Elle carrying a takeout coffee cup, Tao behind her carrying both their bags. They both do a double take when they see Nick on the sofa.
“And who is this?” Elle asks, and Charlie can see the gears turning in her head.
“Oh this is…” Charlie looks to Nick, unsure of how to proceed. He doesn’t want to accidentally out Nick, but Elle and Tao already know he’s been on a date with a “Nick.”
“I’m Nick. I– I’m. Seeing? Charlie?”
Charlie’s eyes widen and he mouths “are you sure?” to Nick. He nods in confirmation.
“Oh! The elusive Nick that took Charlie to a hockey game and left him smitten!” Elle skips to the armchair and throws herself down.
“You can’t say anything!” Charlie says hurriedly to her. Tao was still standing in the hallway with his arms crossed. “He’s not out yet.”
“Clearly,” Tao sniffs. “We’d know if Nick Nelson , hockey king, was gay.”
“Bi, actually,” Nick interjects. Charlie reaches out and grabs Nick’s hand once more, squeezing twice.
“Tao be nice! You know how taboo it is to be queer in sports, especially hockey!” Charlie admonishes his friend before turning to Nick, “I apologize about him, he’s quite overprotective of his friends.”
“I’m so happy for you Charlie!” Elle squeals, disrupting the tension. “I’m happy for you as well, Nick! It’s not easy to come out, especially to two strangers.”
“You are actually the third person I’ve come out to today,” Nick says, his face still stained with a rose blush.
“That’s huge Nick,” Charlie whispers before remembering his manners. “Shit I’m a horrible host! That’s Elle and Tao, my housemates and friends.”
“It’s a pleasure to meet you both,” Nick nods to Tao and then reaches across the arm of the sofa to shake Elle’s hand. “I’ve heard a lot about you.”
“Only bad things, I hope,” Elle winks.
“The worst,” Nick confirms.
“Nick was just telling me about how he has a couple classes with Darcy from LGBTQIA society,” Charlie says conversationally.
“I love Darcy!” Elle says excitedly. “My favorite lesbian chaos demon.”
“That’s putting it lightly,” Nick jokes, shifting closer to Charlie and wrapping an arm around his shoulders.
“The last time we were at one of her parties, Tao got so drunk off of her punch that he lost one of his trainers,” Charlie says, grinning wickedly.
“Says the one that had an entire conversation with a streetlight that same night,” Tao retorts, finally moving into the room and sitting on the other side of Charlie.
“Oi!”
“Also ‘trainer’ is just British for ‘sneaker’,” Tao adds on, leaning forward to address Nick with a wicked grin.
“I’m still assimilating, you cunt.” Charlie defends himself with a laugh.
“Pretty soon you’ll be going out for a rip and hacking a dart, bud!” Nick says in an exaggerated Canadian accent. Charlie secretly loves it, though he’ll never admit it. Elle and Tao burst out laughing.
“I have no idea what you just said,” Charlie sticks his tongue out at Nick.
“Better skedaddle back to London, then,” Nick quips, cracking up.
“Arseholes, the lot of you,” Charlie mutters good naturedly. He stands and offers his hand to Nick. “On that note, Nicholas and I are going to my room.” Nick grabs Charlie’s hand and hoists himself up, still chuckling. Elle and Tao let out a “whoop!” as Charlie closes the door behind them.
“I like them,” Nick says, glancing around the room. Charlie realizes that this is his first time here. He gives the room a perfunctory glance, relieved he hasn’t left dirty laundry laying on the ground.
“I shouldn’t have introduced you, the three of you are going to endlessly make fun of me!”
“It’s just because we like you,” Nick says as he sits on the edge of Charlie’s bed.
“Well it’s a good thing I like you, too,” Charlie sits on the bed beside Nick, moving so he is sitting against the headboard, patting the space beside him. Nick moves up and settles himself against the pillows. “How are you doing? You came out to more people.” Nick is silent for a moment and Charlie leans his head against Nick’s shoulder, twining their fingers together.
“It felt easy to tell Tao and Elle, but I think that’s because they’re already so open and involved in the community,” Nick says quietly, his voice low. “I know it’ll be harder to tell the hockey boys.”
“Remember, you don’t have to tell anyone until you’re ready,” Charlie turns his head and presses a soft kiss to Nick’s neck, his skin searing against his lips. “I am proud of you, you know? Today was a huge day for you.”
“That's why I didn’t text you today. I’ve been having a crisis over having told someone. I’m sorry.” Nick fiddles with a stray curl by Charlie’s temple.
“You don’t have to be sorry,” Charlie murmurs, looking into honey and amber eyes.
“I meant what I said yesterday, though. I want to come out. It just might take some time.” Nick’s brows furrow and Charlie wants to kiss the wrinkles that had just formed.
“You didn’t come out to Elle and Tao just because I’m out, right?” Charlie feels doubt creep into his mind, burrowing its claws deep. “I could have told them you were getting tutoring or–”
“Char, I came out because I wanted to,” Nick interrupts Charlie mid-spiral, kissing the top of his head. “Promise.”
“Alright then,” Charlie says, telling himself to let it go. Trust is a thing that he’s been working on, and Nick sounded sincere enough.
“I want to be with you,” Nick takes his index and middle finger and props them under Charlie’s chin, urging him to look up. Charlie obliges and Nick leans down to kiss him. Their lips press together, softly at first, but rapidly building. Charlie’s breath hitches as Nick’s tongue presses against Charlie’s mouth, requesting access. Charlie opens his mouth and moans softly as their tongues meet, swirling around each other, tasting and exploring. Familiar, and yet, still so, so exciting. Nick bites down gently on Charlie’s lower lip and Charlie rises up onto his knees, moving to straddle Nick’s lap. Large hands grasp at his waist and Charlie buries his fingers in auburn hair, pulling gently at the soft strands. Nick groans and Charlie surges forward, his body acting on instinct.
“Sorry,” Charlie says, pulling back.
“Do that again,” Nick pulls Charlie forward, their lips crashing against each other. Charlie pulls at the hem of Nick’s jumper, Nick’s hands leaving him to momentarily help pull the garment off. Nick grabs at Charlie’s jumper, brows raised in a silent question. Charlie reaches down and pulls the sweater over his head, tossing it to the side. Charlie is left shirtless while Nick still has a t-shirt on, and he plans to remedy that situation. Charlie kisses down the warm expanse of Nick’s throat, sucking and licking while Nick writhes beneath him. The gold dusting of freckles across Nick’s skin bursts to life as he removes his shirt, like a galaxy that yearns to be discovered.
“Your freckles are like a constellation that I can’t wait to explore,” Charlie murmurs as he traces haphazard shapes, connecting the dots, his lips lingering where fingers had just brushed. “I wonder how long it will take to explore each individual one…” Charlie continues his journey, sliding lower as he traces the hard ridges of Nick’s abdomen. Charlie presses his lips to soft skin, smiling as the muscles contract under his touch.
Nick lets out a gasp. “Holy shit.”
“I can stop if you want me to,” Charlie says, looking up at Nick through his lashes.
“I know we talked about taking it slow, but you’re driving me crazy,” Nick pants, his pupils blown wide, cheekbones stained with a crimson blush, forehead glistening. Charlie brings himself back up to Nick, straddling his thighs, twining his fingers through strawberry blond hair, tugging slightly. Nick’s chin lifts and Charlie trails his lips down the exposed column of throat, nipping slightly when he gets to the expanse of skin that connects the neck to the shoulder. He feels Nick shudder and Charlie chuckles darkly, bringing his lips to meet Nick’s. Tongues and lips danced in synchronous harmony as Charlie lost himself in the sensation of having Nick underneath him. Charlie ground his hips against Nick, relishing in the feeling of their erections brushing, separated by only a few layers of fabric.
“Can I… can I touch you?” Charlie asks, moaning as their bodies rocked together.
“Please,” Nick gasps, his hands trailing down Charlie’s spine, nails scratching slightly. Charlie flicks the button of Nick’s jeans open before palming Nick through his boxers. He was big . Charlie kisses Nick as he reaches into Nick’s boxers and wraps his hands around Nick’s thick shaft. They break apart and Charlie looks down at Nick, his pink tip glistening with precum. Charlie rubs his thumb across the tip, spreading the moisture down, twisting his wrist as he reaches the base. Nick’s head fell against the headboard, his bottom lip catching between his teeth. Charlie keeps working Nick’s cock, alternating between fast and slow, watching as Nick falls apart beneath him.
“Char, I’m close…” Nick whimpers and Charlie continues to stroke with one hand, bringing the other up to Nick’s mouth, slipping his index and pointer finger into Nick’s mouth. He sucks hard as he falls apart underneath Charlie, orgasm leaving him shaking against the headboard.
“Holy fuck,” Charlie whispers, leaning forward to kiss Nick passionately, disregarding the sticky mess between them.
“You’re incredible,” Nick says against Charlie’s lips, their breaths intermingling. Charlie smiles, pulling back to get a look at Nick. His hair was mussed from Charlie’s hands, eyes bright, lids hooded from residual pleasure. Charlie captured Nick’s lips in yet another kiss, lips lingering, barely touching, mere atoms separating them.
Charlie pulls back and looks into Nick’s amber irises, “That was okay? You’re okay?”
“I’m incredible.”
“Is that the only word in your vocabulary?” Charlie teases, trailing his fingertips down the broad expanse of Nick’s chest, every dip and hollow mapped by Charlie’s fingers. Nick shudders beneath him as Charlie brings his hand back up, tweaking gently at his nipples before carding his fingers through the strawberry strands of Nick’s hair. Charlie rocks his hips into Nick, the friction almost unbearable.
“Let me?” Nick twists his torso and rolls them over, Charlie now laying on his back with Nick straddling his waist. “Let me take care of you.”
“Oh Nick…” Charlie moans, the delicious weight of the hockey player pressing into him in all the right places. Nick braces one of his arms on the top of Charlie’s headboard, rocking his pelvis, his other hand by the side of Charlie’s head.
“You look so gorgeous like this,” Nick groans from above, still moving at a torturously slow pace. Charlie opens his eyes and the sight of Nick above him, forearm muscles straining with his hair falling flopping on his forehead is almost enough to make Charlie spontaneously combust.
“I’m… close,” Charlie gasps and Nick finally, finally, picks up the pace. The feeling of Nick’s body atop of him, grinding against his still covered cock is enough for the euphoria to reach an earth-shattering crescendo, pleasure oscillating through his body in waves. Charlie basks in the feeling, eyes closed against the light as the aftershocks of his orgasm dissipated, leaving him feeling weightless atop his bed.
Nick shifts so he is laying beside Charlie and he feels fingers in his hair as Nick murmurs, “I’ll be right back.”
Charlie just hmms and keeps his eyes closed, clothes rustling beside him. His door opens and he hears a quiet conversation, water running briefly before his bedroom door closes again and he feels Nick sit down on the end of the bed.
“Let’s get you cleaned up,” Nick kisses Charlie softly on the forehead and he reluctantly opens his eyes.
“Hi,” Charlie says shyly.
“Hi, yourself,” Nick smiles, a damp washcloth in his hands. Nick gently smooths the cloth over Charlie’s bare chest, and his heart cracks. No one had ever taken care of him like this before. Ben had never–. Charlie stops that thought before he could spiral. He didn’t need to dredge up old memories. Not when there was a gorgeous hockey player tending to him. Nick finishes up, sets the washcloth gently on the bedside table and lays down next to Charlie, the mattress dipping slightly under the solid weight.
“Thank you,” Charlie whispers, turning on his side to face Nick, “no one has ever done that for me before.”
Nick's brow creased in confusion. “You deserve it. You’re the most amazing person I’ve ever met.” Charlie scoffs at the compliment, not even realizing he’s doing it until Nick interrupts his thoughts. “I mean it.”
“I really like you, Nick,” Charlie looks into warm brown eyes.
“How would you feel about coming to the bar with me tomorrow? There’s an away game playing and the whole team is meeting up. And… it’s best they get used to your presence.” Charlie frowned and Nick continued, “for when I come out. They might be nicer to you if they see how awesome you are beforehand.”
“You want to introduce me to your friends?” Charlie feels his breath hitch in his chest.
“We don’t have to if you don’t want to!” Nick says hurriedly, “I don’t want to pressure–”
Charlie presses his lips to Nick’s, effectively shutting him up. “I’d love to go.”
Nick heaves a sigh of relief before noting the time.
“Shit! I didn’t think it was this late, I have an early morning practice.” Charlie’s heart sank at that; he didn’t want Nick to go, as pathetic as that was.
“Stay,” Charlie says, eyes widening in shock as he registers the word that had just come out of his mouth.
“You sure?” Nick says, sitting up, abdominal muscles bunching in a way that was truly unfair.
“Yeah. I have to practice polyrhythms before my midterm so I’ll leave in the morning with you.” Charlie smiles as Nick settles back down on the bed, setting an alarm on his phone before nestling under the covers. Charlie relishes in the warmth of the body next to his as Nick lifts his arm enough for Charlie to settle on his chest. From this position, he can hear the beating of Nick’s heart, a resounding thud resonating through Charlie’s head, clearing it of all thoughts as he drifts off into a dreamless sleep.