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Sunset spills over the concrete tiles of the school rooftop. It’s a beautiful day, complete with the faint chirp of birdsong and the rustling of leaves in the distance as Tsukasa bows his head, face flushed, and waits.
“Is this a joke?”
Rui’s words, sharp and clipped, echo in the empty space. He says nothing else, but his hands begin to clench. There is a tension in the air that gradually sets in.
Tsukasa’s eyes widen, mouth gaping slightly at the sight of unbridled disgust and hurt in narrowed amber eyes.
“It’s not... It’s not a joke, Rui.” He bites out sheepishly, clinging tighter to the plush in his arms as he smiles nervously. “Haha, did my words blow you away? As expected of a star like me! But listen, I do like you. I really, really like you.”
There is a tightness in his throat. His heart races, jackrabbiting within his chest. He swallows down the anxiety, the faint pang of hurt, focusing instead on the unreadable expression Rui’s face has smoothened into.
“I didn’t think you were like this, Tsukasa-kun.”
Tsukasa freezes, smile finally dropping.
“...Huh?” He tries to laugh, even as his hands squeeze tighter and tighter around the plush in his arms. “What do you mean?”
Rui takes a step forward, figure large and imposing. There’s a smirk on his face now, and it isn’t a nice one. He’d only seen that same smile once before, directed at him when he’d spewed words of vitriol at Nene. But he hadn’t– he hadn’t done anything wrong this time, had he?
Unless it really— unless Rui–
Did he really detest the idea of Tsukasa being with him?
“Is this fun for you?” Rui laughs, without any hint of humour in his voice. “Do you think of this as some sort of game? A role for you to play in your latest show? That’s cruel, Tsukasa-kun. I didn’t think you were that sort of person, but maybe that was wrong of me.”
“No! It’s not— It’s not a game to me! Listen, Rui. You can’t even give me a chance?”
At that, Rui seems to huff out of sheer disbelief. Something shutters over his eyes, leaving behind not a trace of emotion. In its place remains a stranger, one Tsukasa cannot seem to recognise.
There’s none of that gentle warmth or kindness or passion that he’s come to associate Rui with. Only furrowed brows and tense shoulders and a look of utter disregard and contempt that pierces him more deeply than how his classmates or once-friends or even relatives have ever looked at him before.
“A chance? With someone like you, when you’re clearly doing this as some sort of– sick joke?” Rui laughs again. “How cruel, Tsukasa-kun. That’s so cruel.”
Tsukasa can only stare with wide eyes as Rui leans over him, eyes alit with fury as he spits.
“I would never be with someone as selfish as you.”
And like that— just like that, there is silence.
Like that, it’s over.
“Ah…” Tsukasa lets his arms fall slowly to his side, the plush in his arms –a platypus, hand stitched and made with care– loosening from his grip. He stares at its bulging eyes and crooked beak with a vague sense of embarrassment, accompanied by the sickening feeling of heartbreak.
The pride he’d felt from before, when it seemed like all he had to worry about was mustering out the courage to confess — that feeling is gone now. He almost couldn't believe that just moments ago, he’d actually felt excited to be here.
A simple rejection would have sufficed, right? But for Rui to say those words to him… For him to look at him with those eyes—
“You really… dislike the idea that much?”
He sees, rather than feels, the moment his heart shatters, in the way Rui blinks abruptly, alarmed.
“I’m sorry, Rui.”
Tsukasa’s eyes fill shamefully with tears.
He just barely manages to choke out the apology. It hurts. It hurts more than how he’d ever been hurt before – to have bared his heart only to have it crushed and spat over, just like that.
But it isn’t– it isn’t Rui’s fault. Tsukasa knows, despite everything, that Rui is kind. If he really felt that way, to have been able to say those words, when Tsukasa had never even seen him spit the same level of contempt to Emu’s brothers when they had insulted her– well, that had to say something about Tsukasa himself, right?
Rui doesn’t respond to his apology, staring instead with wide eyes as Tsukasa’s world continues tilting off its axis.
And Tsukasa must look like a mess, really, if Rui, even with all his fury and disgust, still seems to want to reach out for him, as though seeking to comfort him, even when Tsukasa knows he isn’t obliged to, not when he didn’t feel the same way.
Not when— not when Rui was truly and undoubtedly disgusted at the thought of someone like Tsukasa being by his side.
The shameful tears he tries to hide away keep falling, regardless of his efforts to smile.
“Sorry to waste your time. I’ll see you tomorrow at practice.”
“Tsukasa-kun, wait—”
He doesn’t stay back to listen more of what Rui might say. It’s enough. What Rui said had been enough.
He’d been stupid to think that anyone– that Rui– would’ve ever wanted him like that.
He’d been stupid to think he’d even had a chance.
The door to Nene’s homeroom opens with a soft slide. At first, Nene doesn’t react, only sparing a second to glance up from her gaming console at the silent offender disturbing her peace.
Then, she catches sight of orange and peach-tipped hair, with none of the exuberance typically associated with it, and does a double-take.
Tsukasa’s hair, from afar, looks mussed. Like he hadn’t taken the time to brush it out like he usually does, raving on about ‘appearances befitting of a star’. His cardigan is crooked, crinkled in odd places like he’d slept in it the night before and decided to just show up to school the next day without any semblance of care towards its unkempt state.
Simply put: Tsukasa looked like shit.
And the day wasn’t even half over yet.
Nene says just that, managing a snarky response as Tsukasa plops down to the empty seat in front of her.
The beauty of lunchtime was that they would be undisturbed. Aside from the few stragglers in class, Nene is alone. And typically, it would be a time of peace for her, where she can sink back into the uncomplicated world of button mashing and high scores. Typically, Tsukasa wouldn’t even be in her class, preferring the company of Rui to bounce off ideas with or explode the courtyard or do… whatever it is that the Weirdo Duo do in school, really.
“You aren’t with Rui today?” The low murmur of her words are almost drowned out by the 8-bit music of her retro game.
Tsukasa makes a miserable sound. He doesn’t look up from where his face is squished into the crook of his arm, voice muffled by his cardigan.
“No.”
“Why?” Another combo. Nene’s crushing her opponent right now. “Had a fight?”
“No.” Tsukasa makes another sound. It sounds oddly like sniffling. Hm.
“I confessed to Rui.”
“Right.”
Tsukasa’s words register.
“Wait, what?” Nene just barely manages to not drop her console. Her character misses his special attack, and the opponent takes the chance to end the match.
Game over.
Nene sighs, only just a little bit annoyed. It was about time, anyway. She was getting sick of watching the two of them dance around each other.
“Ah, well, congratulations then—”
“I got rejected.”
Nene drops her console.
“Huh?”
Tsukasa still doesn’t look up, doesn’t do anything really, except make miserable little sounds that Nene realises with belated horror, are the sounds of sniffling.
Tsukasa.
Tenma Tsukasa.
Sniffling.
“You what? You got rejected? There has to be some kind of mistake. There’s no way Rui would— Did you do it right?”
“Of course I did it right!” Tsukasa snaps, finally lifting his face from where it’d previously been buried. There are creases on his cheek from being pressed into crinkled fabric. His eyes are red and puffy, nose just a tad bit runny, but thank god he isn’t crying at the moment. Nene isn’t sure if she’d be able to handle it, quite frankly.
“I– I asked Rui to come to the roof. I told him I needed help with practising my part for our next show. I waited until it was sunset, because that’s the best time, right? That’s what everyone says! And– I asked Saki for help, and she told me to get a gift or something, to show that I really meant what I said, so I made him a platypus plushie. Then, when Rui turned back to look at me, I told him, ‘I like you. Please go out with me.’ How much clearer do I need to be?”
“And you’re sure he rejected you?”
“He called it a joke, Nene! He said– he– he said I was cruel, and selfish, and—” Tsukasa cuts himself off as the air of hurt around him seems to permeate deeper. “He said… all those awful things to me, so I’m pretty damn sure I was rejected.”
What.
What???
Kamishiro –‘Tsukasa-kun truly does shine like a star’– Rui, not seeing Tsukasa in that way, turning Tsukasa down, and calling Tsukasa selfish?
You’re joking, right?
“...You’re joking, right?”
At her words, Tsukasa makes a pathetic low keening sound. Nene winces as he drags his arm to rub vigorously at his eyes, before attempting to smile tremulously. The very picture of pitifulness.
“Well, maybe it’s for the best,” Tsukasa whispers. “Since Rui clearly doesn’t see me in that way, at least now I can put these feelings behind me and we can… just… keep doing shows together. As friends. Haha.”
Nene feels just a little bit like her video game character right now: pixelated form tucked into a position of defeat, frozen in place with no thoughts except the sound of static in her ears.
Game over, the title screen reads. To try again, please reset to your last existing save point.
Nene would love to reset to her last save point, before Tsukasa had walked into the room and told her he’d confessed to Rui and had gotten rejected somehow. She’d love to go back to when things still made sense.
Seriously.
The confession should have gone well.
It was like an irrefutable fact, the same energy as the saying that goes: the sky is blue, grass is green. Tsukasa and Rui are undeniably, irrevocably, grossly infatuated with each other. She’s heard so much gushing from both sides she’s frankly amazed her ears have yet to bleed.
From across her, Tsukasa doesn’t grace her with another response, only slumping lower into his seat, still with that wavering smile as he tries (and fails) to pretend like everything is fine.
Nene bites back a groan, wincing as she digs into her bag for a pack of tissues.
“Here, wipe your face already.” She presses the offering into Tsukasa’s hands awkwardly.
Tsukasa makes a low sound of thanks. “Ah, thanks Nene. Sorry I interrupted your game.”
“It’s fine. I was losing anyway.” Not really, but a little white lie never hurt anyone. “I’ll just reload back to my save point, so don’t worry about it.”
Finally, Tsukasa’s smile softens into something just a little bit more genuine. “Ever the gamer, hm?”
Nene snorts, rolling her eyes. “Are you trying to get yourself kicked out of my class?”
“No, no!” Tsukasa rebutts hastily. “Just— thanks, Nene. You’re an amazing friend.. Anyone would be lucky to have you by their side.”
Geez. Nene averts her eyes awkwardly. “Ah… enough already… I get it, I get it. Look. You’re… a good friend too, okay? You can come look for me anytime you want. I can’t do much, but I’ll listen.”
Really. Tsukasa — selfish?
She just barely manages to hold back a sigh, watching impassively as Tsukasa gradually begins to cheer up, launching into a tale with exaggerated gestures and admittedly, a rather muted sort of energy. Still, it’s worlds better than the pitious sight from before.
She’s just– so confused. She has eyes, okay? She’s seen how Rui looks at Tsukasa, and there’s no reason why he would turn him down, much less… say those awful things to him.
Nothing about this made sense.
Just what in the world has gotten into you, Rui?
She’s determined to get to the bottom of things.
Rui sits at the rooftop, accompanied by his thoughts and the easy silence of an emptying school following the last of lessons. The faint chirp of birdsong, the rustling of leaves; it brings a tranquillity to the air that he doesn’t really feel.
A stuffed platypus with bulging eyes and a crooked beak stares back at him; clearly handmade and made with care, yet abandoned hastily from Tsukasa’s hasty retreat just a day prior. Likely, Tsukasa hadn’t even noticed when it had slipped out of his grip as he’d left.
Made with love. Cruelly abandoned.
A contradiction – just like the mystery that is Tenma Tsukasa.
Rui glances at it, a dull pang of hurt stabbing him briefly in his chest as he recalls the sight of Tsukasa’s face, right before he’d turned and left. The memory twists the hurt into something a little more painful, a little more bitter.
Just… where had it all gone wrong, really?
“I like you. Please go out with me.”
Even now, a whole day after the confes– jok– betraya– debacle, Rui still doesn’t understand. Doesn’t know how to even begin examining the raw aching wound left behind by Tsukasa’s cruel words.
There was no logical explanation for it. Nothing Rui had done recently would have prompted such a drastic response from Tsukasa, in order to mess with him, to get him to stay away, to do… anything, really, that might disturb the tenuous peace between them.
“I don’t suppose you could tell me what to do, hm?” Rui sighs, poking the platypus gently on its beak. It seems to stare back at him with a look of judgement in those bulging eyes.
No response.
Well, worth a try.
Rui sighs again, longer this time, for good measure.
It doesn’t make him feel better, not when he can still hear the echoes of Tsukasa’s voice carrying in the wind, when he sits just a short distance away from where Tsukasa had decided to reach into the crevice of his chest and crush his heart.
As a joke.
A joke.
There was no other explanation for it, right?
Sure, it’s not like he’d really hidden his own feelings for the other. Rui has long since accepted the fact that his own affections would never be reciprocated. That one day, Tsukasa would find someone more suited for him and leave him too. Rui would’ve been happy to just simply cherish the present, to cherish Tsukasa and all his brightness, for as long as it would’ve lasted.
But clearly, somewhere along the way, Tsukasa had found out about Rui’s feelings, and he’d been cruel enough to turn it into some twisted sort of joke, to take advantage of his feelings to make a mockery out of a confession, for– for what, Rui doesn’t know.
He’s not sure he even wants to know.
Rui presses his face into the stomach of the platypus plush, willing the swirl of emotions within him to settle down. He feels lost and wholly overwhelmed.
Just then, the door to the roof slams open. Nene, in all of her 5’1 glory, glares at him with the heat of a thousand suns.
“We need to talk,” she snaps.
Rui blinks, alarmed. It’s never a good sign when Nene is this upset, especially not with him.
“Ah… Nene-kun…? Did I do something wrong?”
Nene’s gaze catches on the sight of the platypus in his hands. Her glower deepens into an expression of irritated fury.
“You–” She storms forwards, eyes flashing with unbridled rage. “–are an absolute idiot.”
Rui flinches, smile twitching. “Ah, Nene-kun. I’m hurt, do you really have that little faith in me? I don’t recall doing anything that might have upset you.”
“Really.” Nene drawls. It isn’t really a question. “You don’t recall, I don’t know, the way you responded to a certain someone’s confession? Calling Tsukasa of all people selfish — seriously, Rui, what the hell?”
“It’s not–! You know how I feel about Tsukasa-kun, Nene! How else was I supposed to react, when the boy I’m in love with decided to confess to me as some sort of joke! What else could it have been? Tsukasa-kun has never once looked at me the same way!”
“Tsukasa has literally been in love with you for months!”
What.
What??????
Rui must have misheard Nene, or have been hit by a wayward machine gear in the last 30 seconds of his emotional outburst because there’s no way he heard those words right.
“Tsukasa-kun… what?”
Nene stares at him with an expression of sheer disbelief, before reaching a hand to pinch at the furrow between her brows.
“This cannot possibly be happening.” Rui hears her mutter faintly, head still imploding slightly at the implication in Nene’s words.
Finally, Nene exhales sharply. “Look, I don’t know what’s going on in your brain to have made you misunderstand the situation this much, but I literally just had to spend the entirety of my lunch break pretending not to notice how the orange idiot was one insult away from crumbling. Yes, Tsukasa likes you. No, it wasn’t a joke.”
“But—”
But…
“...Why?” Rui’s voice dies abruptly, until he’s left only able to stare down at the plush in his hands, at the way his hands cling tightly to its stomach, white-knuckled and trembling.
Why me?
“It’s… not worth it, to like someone like me.”
Nene doesn’t respond, not immediately. But she loses the furrow in her brows, and her shoulders slump. Now, without her fury, she only looks exhausted.
“That’s not a question that I can answer. And it’s not a question you can answer to as well.”
He stares at Nene, unsure of just what to say. What can he even say, when faced with a response like that?
Nene continues eventually. “It’s Tsukasa’s choice, isn’t it? And he made that choice from the moment he decided to drag you up to this roof and confess. The moment he decided to sew that platypus plush for you. The moment he decided that he liked you. You don’t get to decide if it’s worth it for him to like you or not.”
“But what if liking me is the wrong choice, Nene? What if I hurt him again, more than I already have, after yesterday? Or if he decides that it was a mistake after all and changes his mind about— this. About us?" Rui croaks out dryly.
The tightness in his chest is suffocating. He remembers once more the look on Tsukasa’s face, now burdened with the weight of clarity. The hurt that Tsukasa had tried so hard to bury, the way his hands had trembled, fisted into his cardigan, crinkling it messily.
Rui had done that.
He’d hurt Tsukasa-kun with his words; he had given in to the anger and the biasness he’d swore to never let cloud his mind ever again, not like those turbulent first days of performing together, when he’d trampled on Tsukasa’s feelings with a sharp, “You cannot become a star.”
Now, the reminder of his condemning words of cruelty and selfishness join the ranks of bitter regret. Shame festers quietly in his chest.
The only one that’s ever been selfish is you.
Nene rolls her eyes. “I can hear you thinking from here. Stop that.”
Rui twitches. “Pardon?”
“You have a mouth, don’t you? So apologise to him. You two have made up like that so many times before, what’s one more? And if anything, an apology is what he deserves at least.”
Right.
I need to apologise to Tsukasa-kun.
Right.
Rui exhales, a newfound sense of steadiness in him despite the feeling of guilt that threatens to swallow him whole.
“Has anyone ever told you how good you are at pep talks?” He manages a smile. “Thanks, Nene. I don’t know how I could possibly make it up to you. You’re… a really great friend, you know? I’m lucky to have you.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Nene grimaces, though her face seems to flush slightly. “I’ve already heard that once today. You too, okay? You, Tsukasa and Emu… You guys have… been here for me too, so… It’s only right for me to do my part.”
Rui can’t help but laugh. “Ah, to think you cared about us this much behind your facade of indifference. Truly, this Kamishiro Rui is honoured!”
Nene scowls, backtracking as she turns to leave. “If you have the energy to tease me, then you’re feeling better. Don’t take too long, it’s weird not seeing you two at school together.”
Then, right before Nene steps over the threshold of the door, she seems to recall something, and smirks.
“Ah, right. Rui, you haven’t checked your phone recently, right?”
“...Not since yesterday. Why?”
Nene’s smirk widens into something quite terrifyingly gleeful.
“You might want to check your messages. Good
luck.”
Rui reaches into the pocket of his pants, pulling out his phone with a single smooth motion, and grimaces.
Good luck indeed.
|| Unknown Number • 19.34pm
kamishiro rui you better watch out.
look, if you didn’t feel the same way, you could have just. turned him down with the same level of respect he would have given to any person in the same position as him!
is that really too much to ask for? is it not just basic decency?
you didn’t have to call him those awful things! you didn’t have to make him feel terrible about himself. do you know how awful it feels, to have to watch the strongest person you know, just break down like that? he came home yesterday crying, and onii-chan never cries! i’ve never once seen my brother like this before. never. and that’s on you.
he really, really liked you and you just decided to throw his feelings into his face??
was a rejection alone not enough for you? was it fun for you to hurt my brother like that?
well news flash! if anything, the only thing onii-chan did wrong was fall for an asshole like you.
you better apologise, kamishiro. or i can’t promise that nothing will happen to you.
Tsukasa really had been serious about his feelings, hadn’t he?
Rui had been the fool here. And it looked like he was going to need more than just a simple ‘Good luck’ to survive his attempt at making it up to Tsukasa-kun, and then not getting slaughtered by his sister.
He runs.
“Tsukasa-kun, wait!”
Rui catches Tsukasa by the corner of his sleeve, just barely missing him flitting out of sight from the second year hallway.
Tsukasa, when trying to hide, disappears easily among the crowd. And now, with his gaze averted and hunched frame, he looked like he would fade from sight the moment Rui let go of his sleeve.
“Kamishiro-kun.” The name stings, digging right into his heart. Right. Rui definitely deserved that. “Please let go. I have business to attend to today, so I can’t walk with you to show practice.”
“Listen, Tsukasa-kun–”
“Later, Kamishiro-kun. I’m busy.”
It’s not the right time for this. It’s not even the right place, with them standing in the middle of the second year hallway, throngs of students making their way past them. Some stare, confused at the sight of them frozen in place, looking distinctly uncomfortable by each other’s presence.
Still, Rui doesn’t want to let go.
Not when he’d already let Tsukasa leave, once.
He thinks if he were to let go this time, just one more time, then the star he’d so desperately tried to keep and had wanted to cherish, would disappear from his life for good.
“No, Tsukasa-kun,” Rui breathes out shakily. “Let’s talk. I have… things I need to say, after yesterday.”
The reminder of yesterday has Tsukasa flinching minutely. Still, despite the shame curdling in Rui’s gut, he doesn’t relent. Eventually, he’s rewarded with the sight of Tsukasa’s nod, hesitant and terrified as it might be.
“Alright then.” Tsukasa’s smile is small and shaky and wrong, but there all the same. “Lead the way.”
Rui swallows at the careful remnants of trust in those quietly uttered words. Perhaps there was still a chance then, to salvage the ruins of the destruction he’d wrought. Not when Tsukasa-kun still looked at him like that – hurt and terrified, yet still ultimately willing to hear him out, to give him a chance.
Shifting his grip from the edge of Tsukasa's sleeve to the palm of his warm calloused hand, Rui laces their fingers together, letting their hands slot in place.
Tsukasa’s hand is lax in his own, still trembling slightly with suppressed emotion. Rui doesn’t comment on it, choosing instead to lead them away from the bustle of the crowding students, towards the more quietly secluded corner of the roof.
Tsukasa stiffens the moment he recognises the place. He tugs his hand harshly out of Rui’s grip, eyes wide and smile dropping into a pained grimace.
“Again, Rui?” He loses the veneer of polite indifference he’d adopted before. Hurt bursts forth out of an uncontrollable dam of emotions tucked away.
He whispers faintly, helplessness in his tone as anguish spills from his every word, “Wasn’t it enough for me to have apologised yesterday? I don’t– what else do you have to say? Do you really despise me this much?”
There are tears in his eyes again. But this time, when they fall, Tsukasa buries his face into his hands, hiding himself away instead. Swallowing down the hurt, even as it threatens to drown him completely.
“I get it, okay? I understand what you were trying to tell me yesterday. I don’t want to– I don’t need to hear anymore. I’ll leave you alone.”
“Tsukasa-kun… I…”
The words don’t come easy. Tsukasa still refuses to look at him through the palms of his hands pressed tightly against his face.
Rui exhales shakily.
“Tsukasa-kun… I’m sorry.”
At that, Tsukasa finally, finally looks up at him.
A single stray tear trails down his freckled cheek. Rui aches with the urge to brush it away, to let his touch linger on soft skin, to watch Tsukasa’s face glow once more with a gentle smile.
But not yet.
Not with the words that still remain unsaid, the elephant in the room accompanied by layers upon layers of misunderstandings and hurt.
“What I said yesterday… I didn’t mean it. Any of it. Tsukasa-kun isn’t selfish or cruel. He isn’t anything like that at all. Tsukasa-kun has only ever been kind. He treats Saki-kun and Aoyagi-kun with so much care. He always puts in effort to bring smiles to everyone’s faces, and—”
“Then why, Rui?” Tsukasa finally interrupts, voice raw and eyes alight with furious desperation. “Why say all those things in the first place? It’s fine if you don’t feel the same way. But my feelings… that confession… it wasn’t a joke! It’s never been a joke, and– I know you don’t feel the same way, but– I…”
Tsukasa’s breathing hitches as he chokes on another sob. Rui finally, finally takes the chance, closing the distance, reaching out to cup Tsukasa’s cheek.
His voice is soft, unbearably so, unwilling to break the tentative truce between them. The warmth of Tsukasa’s skin seeps into his hand, comforting and solid. Real. Tsukasa is still here, despite everything.
The setting sun, a parody of yesterday, acts almost like a cruel reminder. Tsukasa in tears, waiting for a response, waiting as Rui falls apart inside, trying and trying to put himself back all over again, to not make the same mistakes as he did, so many times before.
The Kamishiro Rui of today makes a different choice from the Rui from before.
He chooses to trust.
Rui breathes, and takes the leap.
“Tsukasa-kun, I like you.”
“...What?”
The expression of sheer disbelief on Tsukasa’s face would’ve been comical in any other situation. Now, it only makes Rui’s heart race as he swallows down the anxiety, the fear, the desire to brush away the stray wisps of orange bangs out of wide startled eyes.
“I like you, Tsukasa-kun. I’ve liked you from the moment I first saw you.”
Tsukasa can’t seem to find the words to respond, even as his face slowly begins to flush from more than just the tears welling in his eyes.
There is a glimmer in his wide-eyed gaze, one that reads almost like a challenge, that asks, why then? Why did you turn me down yesterday like that? Why did you leave?
“When you told me you liked me yesterday, I was… scared. I didn’t think that my feelings would be reciprocated, because, well– who could love someone like me? I didn’t think that there would be anyone who would like me enough to confess… if not as some sort of joke, or to have some fun, or—”
“I want you, you idiot!” Tsukasa interrupts, eyes bright with emotion. He says it even more desperately this time, voice cracking and painfully vulnerable. “How many times do I have to say it? It wasn't... a joke!”
He jerks away from Rui’s hold, only to hit the wall behind him, trapping him in place with nowhere to go.
Rui doesn’t let go.
“I know, Tsukasa-kun,” Rui murmurs softly. “I know that now. I was just being stupid. I’m sorry I hurt you. I never wanted to.”
Even here, even now, with Tsukasa’s eyes red from crying and Rui’s heart twisting with guilt, there is a fluttering in his stomach at the thought of being able to hold Tsukasa like this; to cup his cheek and brush away the stray tears from those bright eyes, to tuck the ends of peach-tipped bangs behind a pale ear.
To be able to lean in and press his head into Tsukasa’s shoulder, letting the soft fabric of his cardigan muffle his voice as he confesses, “I really, really like you, Tsukasa-kun. I’ve never liked anyone like this before. I’m sorry about what I said to you yesterday.”
Slowly, very slowly, Tsukasa’s hands reach out, hesitantly closing around him to hold him close.
He says, “I forgive you.”
And Rui breathes, grateful and exhilarated and hopeful, all at once. Wanting to muster up the courage, to say more than just a raw and emotional, "Thank you."
A pause.
“Does this mean you’re saying yes to being my boyfriend?”
The non-sequitur that interrupts the melancholic atmosphere in the air, in a way that is so distinctively Tsukasa-kun, has Rui biting back a laugh.
He looks up to peer at Tsukasa’s flushed face, entranced by the sight of those slightly trembling lips, full and warm.
“If you’ll have me,” he says, and takes a chance.
He leans in to press a chaste kiss onto soft lips, the same way he has dreamed of doing, time and time again, to the boy he loves with all of his heart.
And Tsukasa smiles.
“I’ll be in your care.”
He kisses back.