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Kidnapped? More Like Babynapped

Summary:

Baby gets kidnapped by a group of criminals, including Darling, Buddy, and Bats. They didn’t know it was Baby who would be kidnapped. They are not pleased.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

Baby put his change into the tip jar on the sound of the beat, giving the employee a nod of thanks as he exited the fast food burger shop.

Joe had requested they get take-out that night, which Baby would normally refuse since the man already had poor health habits with eating; if it was up to his dad they would have PB and J for every meal. Tonight though, Baby had caved.

That morning, Baby had tried to make sunny-side up eggs only to end up burning them to crisps when he got distracted and forgot they were on the stove. He’s lucky that their apartment was cheap enough to not have a working fire alarm; he had received enough noise complaints to know some of the neighbors were looking for an excuse to get rid of them. After that disaster, the thought of already-made, delicious food just sounded too good to refuse.

It was a quick walk back from the restaurant to their place, but he soon realized that the mood of the music he had been listening to while waiting in the restaurant did not match the tone of a calm, late night walk back to the apartment. His footsteps were offbeat and the ambiance created by the song just wasn’t right.

He had been planning on choosing a lowkey song before his finger slipped onto “You’re Gonna Go Far, Kid” by The Offspring. The music started with a few seconds of build-up before the main beat kicks in. Unlike usual, he hadn’t heard the aggressive strums of guitar signaling the start of the song. A ringing in his ears had overpowered the noise since at the same moment the beat came in, a bat had been bashed into the back of his head. He knew the song well enough to know that the bat had collided with his skull just on the beat. He had fallen to the ground and at some point dropped the bag of food, but all he could focus on was the throbbing of his head; the pulses would have been on beat to the drums that come into the song with the guitar if he could hear it playing right now.

Guess this song hadn’t been a misclick after all, he thought as he succumbed to passing out on the sidewalk next to the spilt bag of take-out food.

---

When Baby woke up, the first thing he noticed was the distinct lack of headphones in his ears. That... was not good. He could hear a slight buzz, but it was hard to tell if it came from an air conditioner or his tinnitus. He went to move his arms and felt resistance from zip-ties clasped around his wrists. Testing out more motion revealed that there were also zip-ties on his ankles tying him to the chair he had woken up in. On his head, he could feel a scratchy fabric. He opened his eyes to reveal the inside of a burlap sack. He must have been kidnapped, he concluded.

Thinking back on it, he remembered being knocked out after he left the fast food restaurant. The growing headache and pain from the back of his head were a testament to that fact. That meant, hopefully, whoever did this didn’t know where he lived. Joe was safe.

With that thought, he let out a breath. He needed to stay calm. At the moment, there was nothing he could do. He was properly restrained and, based on his hearing, alone in the room. If he stressed out it would only make the ringing in his ears louder, taking away his hearing.

All he could do was wait.

It didn’t take long; anytime from five minutes to less than half an hour later (it was difficult to tell without a song to base how long had passed), he heard a noise. Further away, from what sounded like another room, he could hear the end of a conversation as a voice grew closer.

“Damn freaks. Why do I gotta be on babysitter duty?” a masculine voice boomed from just outside the room.

A door was swung open and he could hear the click of a light switch. Through the fabric of the burlap bag, a few streams of light came through. The person who had entered the room had heavy footsteps as he marched inside. Baby almost wished he had his portable recorder, he could have used the steps as a nice backing base for one of his remixes.

“Maybe you’ll answer more questions than boss man out there, won’t cha?” the voice from earlier jeered.

Baby straightened up in the chair as the footsteps grew closer to him.

“Apparently you’re related to some big shot with a bunch of money, which we’ll get for your ‘safe’ return.” The man’s sarcasm was evident in his tone. He lowered his voice and continued, “I’m included to believe damaged goods will be just as well received as long as you’re alive. So you better cooperate if you don’t want to be damaged beyond repair. You understand me?”

That answered the question of what he was doing there. These people were after Doc. He knew being kidnapped was a possibility in this line of work, especially after he saw on the news that they had captured a blurry picture of him driving the latest heist members away from the crime scene. He always knew being kidnapped was a possibility, but it never actually occurred to him the consequences of it happening.

Aside from the threats, he was surprised to realize he knew that voice. He also knew that the psycho behind the sack covering his face was not someone to mess with.

Here goes to trying to keep all of his body parts working and attached, Baby thought as the bag was yanked from his head by none other than Bats.

“No fucking way,” Bats stared at Baby, who as soon as his eyes adjusted to the light, stared back at the man stone faced.

“Wait- so that means...” Bats continued. “This is a hit on Doc?”

Baby stayed still. When he first started driving for Doc, the man had told him people will leave him alone if he doesn’t give them a reaction. That advice had stuck with Baby throughout the years, becoming instinctual to him. He would wait for Bats’ next move.

The man leaned down to peer at Baby’s face, too close for Baby’s liking. Then Bats burst out laughing. Not a subtle laugh, but a full-on cackle. He would have collapsed if not for his hands on his knees holding him up. Baby quirked an eyebrow up at the display and was met with a glob of spit to the face. He wrinkled his lips but didn't say anything. Bat’s laughter started to petter out while Baby tried to ignore the glob of his spit that had started to drip down his face.

“Ah haha, oh man. This is too good,” Bats said as he wiped the tears from his eyes. Baby’s stomach sunk as a gleeful look came over the man’s face. “Hmm what to do, what to do? Should I... let you go?”

He made sure he gave the man a deadpan stare; Baby thought the spit residue on the side of his face really helped to sell the look. He knew Bats was a loose cannon. There was no telling what the man would do.

While the conversation helped give him something to focus on, Baby could tell the nonexistent noises of his tinnitus were starting to grow louder around him. He faked causal movement as he maneuvered his hands to the side of his leg and began to quietly pat out a rhythm.

“Aw, does little Baby need his pacifier? You gonna start crying for your iPod?”

Baby continued to give him no response. Bats face darkened. “Fine, no response? Maybe if you begged I’d let you go.”

“No,” Baby stated factually.

“No?” Bats repeated incredulously.

“No- you won’t let me go just for that.”

Bats might be a wild card, but he had a few constants: he hated Baby, was quick on the trigger, and he would never just give up.

“Heh, Baby’s growing some balls. They just grow up so quick,” Bats mocked before settling into a serious tone. “I’ll tell you this: If the two other members of this group who have a particular liking to you find out you’re in here, they wouldn’t be too happy. I’ll abandon this score and help you out. But if our favorite crime couple doesn’t care, they do nothing ‘bout it- then I’m doing nothing ‘bout it.”

He was concentrated on Bat’s words, but in the background of his hearing, he could hear the beginnings of a discussion outside the room. Bats hadn’t seemed to notice so Baby made no indication.

“Anyway, I mostly just want to see this play out,” Bats resumed his soliloquy as he cocked a grin Baby’s way. “Who knew babysitting could be so interesting, maybe I should kidnap people for ransom more often.”

Baby shot him a glare.

“Nah, too much work. Not that you’d know that, you workaholic. Driving for Doc’s heists every week? No wonder they thought you were close enough to him to hold as ransom.”

“Say, what’s the relation between you and Doc anyway? I might be willing to watch this play out, but breaking only a few bones is considered being on the sidelines to me.”

Now that was a question Baby wasn’t about to answer. He glanced left and right, like he was divulging a secretive, and then nodded towards the door. From what he had heard, the group outside were definitely talking about planning and stuff that Bats would be upset about being left out of. Bats took the bait and turned his focus to the door.

“They’re planning shit without me!” Bats took the bait. He rushed to the door, hesitating in the entry a second before he left. “Have fun with your eavesdropping, kid.”

At the acknowledgment, Bats left him alone in the room, with the door open a crack. They both knew he wasn’t capable of escaping his bonds. Baby strained his ears to get ready to pick up on the conversation, which was unneeded since Bats came into the discussion yelling:

“Hey team! What are we talking about? ...Without me,” he questioned, his malice palpable even from one room over.

“We were going to tell you afterward, I swear! Since you were supposed to be watching over our hostage,” squeaked a nervous voice. Baby didn’t recognize the voice.

“Yeah, well it felt too much like babysitting to me,” Bats said with a small laugh at the inside joke. “Plus, he’s tied up good. There’s no way he could escape.”

“If Bats says our hostage can’t escape, he can’t,” a bored feminine voice concluded. “Now, I think it’s time for the two of you to explain to us why we should help you with this ransom that you’ve given us absolutely no context on.” She always knew how to cut to the chase, which is how he could tell this voice belonged to Darling.

“Facts, hun,” replied the only man who could complement her without ending up dead, Buddy.

There was a pause where Baby heard nothing after that. He would bet that Darling and Buddy had started making out while other members of the group looked on with disgust or adverted their eyes.

“Um, yes. Why you’re here,” the nervous person eventually rambled out. “We want to blackmail one of the biggest crime lords! He goes by the name Doc.”

“Is this a joke to you?” Buddy barked out.

The man's voice nearly hit falsetto as he anxiously responded, “No sir!”

“It is not,” assured a confident, ambiguous voice; same as the nervous man, Baby wasn’t sure who this voice belonged to. “We are aware that you regularly work for him, which is why you’d be the perfect people to help with your insider information on him.”

“How do you know we wouldn’t just tell Doc, then?” harshly questioned Darling.

“Well- well you see-”

The nervous speaker was cut off by the confident one: “You might work for him a lot, but do your loyalties lie with him?”

There was a significant pause, during which Baby shifted his position on the chair he was tied to, before Buddy responded, “You said you were offering a shit ton of money, while we stay anonymous, and with no repercussions on us?”

“Yes.”

“Will our part in this be so covered up that we could go back to working for Doc if he can keep his business going after this?”

“Of course.”

The sound of hands slamming on a table reverberated clearly, even in the room Baby listened from. “That’s a great pitch and all, but I still want to know your plan and what we have to contribute,” interrogated Bats.

“Oh, you don’t need to contribute at all.”

“Huh?”

“You see,” the confident speaker explained, “we’re not in it for the money. Well maybe a little bit, but that’s not our focus. A few years ago, we had someone on the inside of our organization that was a mole for him. We were betrayed. Now we want to humiliate Doc like he did to us. That means losing his closest allies, including you three. Even if he doesn’t know the lot of you betrayed him, we’ll know, and that’s what matters.”

“...what do you mean by ‘including us three’?” asked Buddy slowly.

“Yeah, there someone else we’re working with that you’re not telling us about?” Darling snapped.

The nervous speaker giggled, “I won’t say working with is the right phrase.”

“You see, we captured the only constant known accomplice of Doc. He wears the same dumb little sweatshirt in every picture on the news he has been seen in. He was even wearing it when we saw him on the street; it’s almost like he wanted to be kidnapped!” the confident voice joked.

“Woah there, what’s with the dark looks?” The confident speaker’s voice had swiftly taken a turn from jovial to concerned.

Two shots went off. Gun shots.

“Bats!?”

“What the hell!?”

“Ugh, shut up. You wanted to do that too, I just happened to be the one to pull the trigger first!”

Baby’s eyes widened. Bats had just blown up the whole operation and Darling and Buddy sounded pissed off. He had heard how they threw Doc under the bus. At least Doc paid them handsomely, Baby didn’t offer much value to them in comparison. There was no telling what they would do with him now.

When he tuned back in, he heard Buddy ask darkly: “Did you know?”

“Yeah, kid’s in the back room,” Bats calmly replied.

After that the door that had been left open by a sliver was slammed wide open, with Buddy standing in the doorway. He looked... concerned? Probably because the deal didn’t go through, Baby thought. Buddy, upon reaching him, instantly grabbed out a knife from his pocket and made quick work of Baby’s restraints. Baby in a daze, let himself be led into the main room.

“Give me one reason to not kill you here and now!” yelled Darling.

He could see finally the face attached to the voice; her mouth was snarled in a scowl as she faced Bats, a gun pointed straight at the man’s forehead. Baby was surprised the gun was on Bats and not himself, wasn’t he the hostage? He looked at the scene distantly, it felt like his brain was engulfed in static that he had to push his thoughts through to access them.

“Listen, I thought these guys would have some big speech to convince us to turn against the kid, but they are idiots. Well, were idiots,” Bats laughed before becoming earnest. “If they knew we worked with Doc, they would have realized we’d also worked with Baby. Their mistake was assuming our relation to him was a detached, standard business-type relationship.”

He pointed over to Baby. “No harm, no foul. Look, the kid’s fine.”

Darling snapped her head towards him, staring for a few seconds before darting to where Buddy held him up. She tightly grabbed each of his shoulders and frantically looked him up and down. He felt unable to move his limbs, so he ended up just staring back at her. In the back of Baby’s mind, he registered that the way Buddy and Darling were supporting him was dangerously close to a hug.

He knew he shouldn’t question it, he should keep quiet as Doc taught him, but he couldn’t help but ask, “Why are you checking over me? Isn’t it better for ransom if I’m a bit scuffed up?”

“Kid... what?” Buddy puzzled.

Darling brought his attention to her by gently squeezing his shoulder, “Baby, do you think we’d use you as a hostage?”

“Well, yeah,” he hesitantly replied. “Wouldn’t you guys still want to finish out the plan? You never give up on heists, why would you on this?”

Darling’s face dropped, “Baby...”

“We’re not using you for fucking ransom!” exclaimed Buddy.

“Why not!? ...You have no reason not to.”

Buddy and Darling shared a glance, they seemed at a loss for the right words. “Because these two idiots care about you!” Bats stated, before grumbling out: “...And I might or might not be warming up to you,” only to quickly start backtracking, “Only a little bit! Don’t forget I was still willing to use you as a hostage.”

“Really?” Baby asked, trying and failing to keep the hopefulness out of his voice. He shouldn’t be seeking validation from criminals, but right now that title felt too harsh for these people he had worked beside for so long.

“What can I say, you grew on us,” Buddy shrugged with a small smile.

“Don’t let it give you a big head though,” Darling joked as she simultaneously pulled him into a side hug and reached up to ruffle his hair.

Bats clapped his hands together. “Great- real cute. Everything’s settled then?”

Baby looked down for a moment in thought before giving Bats a confident nod.

“Come on then, let’s get out of here! This time I get to be the driver and you can be the passenger,” Darling joked.

“Don’t even think about taking shotgun though, that seat belongs to me,” Buddy jested in a manner that suggested it was also not a joke, but a warning, as he often did with matters about his wife.

They soon settled into Darling and Buddy’s convertible car. He sent Bats a questioning look as the man sat down in the back seat of the car next to him.

“Shut up. I took an Uber to get here,” Bats spat out.

“I didn’t say anything,” cheekily replied Baby.

As Buddy worked on opening the roof of the car, Darling put on a pair of heart-shaped sunglasses from the glove box.

“I’m going for the ‘Baby aesthetic’!” She made a performance out of adjusting the sunglasses on her face. “What do you think?” she eagerly addressed him.

He gave her a thumbs up. She lit up and turned around for a moment only to pull out another pair of shades. She handed Baby a star-shaped pair of sunglasses.

“Thought this would help you relax, you’re stiff as a board,” she remarked.

“I know a radio station that mostly plays Queen songs, let me put that on,” Buddy commented. Having just finished opening the car roof, Buddy turned his attention to fiddling with the car radio. Baby slit on the shades.

Soon the melodies of Queen were dancing through the air mixed with the sound of Darling revving the engine as she took off. Baby’s shoulders fell from their hunched position and he slumped into the seat as the wind flew through his hair. He finally let himself relax as the noises around him drowned out his tinnitus, surrounded by people who not only noticed but actually valued his presence.

Notes:

I was gonna add a mini epilogue, but I decided not to. It would have been the group would go to get ice cream and when they get to the shop, Doc would be there with his nephew. Doc is really confused and asks, “What are you all doing together??”

Also, why did this turn out so long?? It was meant to be around 1000 words, not anything over 2000 T-T. But I hope you enjoyed! Please leave a kudo or comment, I guzzle them up like an anteater near an ant nest :D