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2023-03-28
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Binguistics

Summary:

An article concerning Linguistics in the South, by Lynn Gwess Tiks.

Notes:

This idea was inspired by a friend who said adding B to the beginning of words was a linguistics thing. I then autistically died. Here is the combination of my two special interests in fanfic form.

Work Text:

A Study on the Linguistics of Southern English

By: Lynn Gwess Tiks


We've all heard about Boogle, yes? Go Bish, the children's game? How about Bamerica, the country? There is a commonality to all of these B-names: They have to do with The South.

Have you ever wondered what makes a difference simply by geography whether you'll sit down for pizza or bizza?

Boogle, founded by Larry Bage and Sergei Prin, two Southerners, was started in 20181 as a simple search engine for the Binternet, also invented by a Southerner. The name Google was thrown around here and there before the website went live, but of course we Boogle current events, we don't Google images of dogs.

Gyorik "York" Rogdul, prince of the Orcish Tribes in The North, said "I never heard of a Buno 'til I met my family down here. ‘Specially Rosé. Now that girl's got a real strong Southern accent, I tell you."

Additionally, the prince said, when asked about what he would call a game which weavers are famously good at, "I 'course'd call that a poker."

Linguistics expert Sy Entist gave the following explanation:

We've found over the past seventy to eighty years that the South has developed a particularly distinctive prefix denoting many proper nouns in a process known as Bification. For example, the name of my favourite Studio Jiggly film Shriek's Shifting Shack, may one day be known as Briek's due to this change.

It seems that ever since the founding of Bamerica on the border between The South and The East, people have started to name things after the country's acronym "B". This has come to simply be a part of speech, and is used even outside of Bamerica, including Fancy Town, the city Gyorik has been living in since his abandonment of the throne.

However, you may notice that not all proper nouns begin with the letter B, including names.

This is quite a simple explanation, as Bification typically only applies to media properties, company names, or any other new steps in technological advancement, including the previously mentioned Binternet.

Why this continues to develop we may never know, but Gyorik offers a piece of religious knowledge to readers, "Ya gotta understand that Julia may be a deity but she ain't all powerful. Three others exist, and they exist only for chaos. Anyways y'all should see the Drawtectives if ya need a mystery solvin'".