Chapter Text
Nobunaga was sitting on the dais, a long forked tail swinging idly behind him as he curiously studied the red scales on his arms. The castle had been woken up that day by Mai’s screams when she found herself waking up next to… well, the devil.
By the time Nobunaga grabbed his sword to fight against whatever was attacking them before dropping it in shock when his own tail smacked him in the face, Mai has had a few seconds to settle down and come to terms with whatever she was seeing. And damn, even as the devil, her lover was smoking hot. Literally. She quickly used her sandal to quash the small fire that was starting around him before looking up to meet his eyes.
What the bloody hell was going on?
But as they were to quickly find out, it was not the only surprise that was awaiting them. Azuchi’s council room was a sore sight that morning as the inner circle convened for an emergency meeting.
“So if I’m getting this correctly, then you guys have been transformed into your monikers,” Mai said before sighing wearily. It was way too early to deal with this on an empty stomach.
Mitsuhide's nine tails swished behind him as he grinned at his counterpart who was jumping up and down in his seat, screeching in reply.
“You don't even have a moniker, Hideyoshi. How on earth did you manage to turn yourself into a monkey?” He slowly raised an eyebrow before a smirk spread onto his face.
“Why, I think it's all the times that I called you a monkey that must have done the trick. And you can't even talk! What a pity!”
Hideysohi screeched again before launching himself wildly at Mitsuhide’s face. The kitsune nonchalantly grabbed him and smothered him under one of his tails.
The only bright spot in this whole deal was Mitsunari, who was literally covered in blinding white light that was somehow piercing through the castle’s roof and shining right on top of him like a spotlight.
“Oh dear, I think I'm floating again,” he said as his angel wings began flapping upwards. Ieyasu sighed and grabbed him by his haori before yanking him down to the floor.
The halo that was hovering above his head shone brighter as he beamed down at Ieyasu. The latter’s quills that were lining his body immediately rose up in self-defense and Mitsunari wisely moved away, lest he got stabbed. Again.
“And where’s Masamune?” Mai asked tiredly and Ieyasu rolled his eyes.
“He is testing his strength against Shogetsu,” he grumbled and batted at an angel wing that had been poking at his face. At that moment, two excited tigers rolled into the hall in a ball of chaos and Mai pinched the bridge of her nose as they began crashing into the walls and knocking down the vases.
“MASAMUNE!” she finally roared and both tigers froze mid-fight.
“Park your furry ass down right now before I cut off your balls!”
One of the tigers that had the other one’s paw down his throat reluctantly let go before trudging sulkily to one of the seats. Shogetsu looked at Mai reproachfully but her glare soon sent her running out of the hall.
Blessed silence finally fell in the room and they looked at each other, not sure how to proceed. While they had extraordinary reasons for councils before (including the one time when Mitsunari went missing only for them to find him three days later on the castle’s roof, busy reading because “it’s where I get the best light”), this one certainly took the cake.
“So I think the obvious question here is how on earth did this happen?” Mai started and the warlords nodded obediently.
Nobunaga finally spoke but he was looking curiously at Mitsunari. “I believe it is clear what we have each turned into. But why does Mitsunari have these wings? Is he some kind of bird?”
Mai looked confusedly at her lover. “What do you mean? He is clearly an angel. With the halo and stuff?” She stopped when they all turned to her in surprise.
“Angels don't look like… that .” Ieyasu motioned towards Mitsunari with a gesture of contempt.
“They carry flowers and they play the biwa.” He looked at the angel up and down before snorting loudly. “Can you imagine him playing a musical instrument?”
Mitsuhide’s smirk was back on as he turned to Mai. “Funny that Mai is the only one who knows what Mitsunari has turned into. It appears that it’s the little one’s imagination that has manifested into reality.”
“Wait, I've done this?!”
But before any of them could react, there was an almighty roar in the courtyard, followed by screams of terror.
“I’VE COME TO KILL YOU NOBUNAGA!”
They all ran out of the council room (except for Hideyoshi who was still stuck in Mitsuhide’ tail and Mitsunari who was floating in the air and was being held down by an irate Ieyasu like an animal balloon) only to find yet another improbable sight.
A gigantic snow white dragon was hovering over the castle, his flapping wings blowing away everything in a ten-mile radius, but the pair of heterochromic eyes left no doubt as to who exactly the dragon was.
Kenshin let out another roar at the sight of the warlords and smoke began filtering out from his snout.
“No,” Mai said firmly and Kenshin withered under her glare.
“But, I -”
“No,” she said again and Kenshin slowly landed at her feet with a pout. It was only then that they noticed who had been riding the dragon. Shingen winked cheekily at Mai as he slipped down from Kenshin’s back before stretching languorously. To say that the warlord was a breathtaking sight would be an understatement.
It appeared that he had also transformed into a tiger but it was a complete opposite to Masamune. Instead of a four- pawed, fanged tiger that, in Masamune’s case, needed to be released back in the wilderness and away from civilization, Shingen was oozing with suave elegance. He was still very much in human form, but with his tiger ears, an even more buff chest, and a majestic tail that was curling hypnotically behind him, he could have easily made the cover of her traveler’s guide to history’s hottest warlords.
He shook his head, sending droplets of water flying out of his hair.
“You would think that riding a dragon would be more comfortable than a horse but Kenshin insisted on trying to gobble the clouds.”
Shingen’s eyes finally left Mai and turned to the warlords. He took a cursory glance at them only to stop on Hideyoshi who was still caught in Mitsuhide’s tail. His smirk was eerily similar to that of Mitsuhide.
“Oh how the mighty have fallen. Or rather, now has the capacity to climb up trees.”
His comment was met by a chaotic mixture of laughter, insults and in Mitsunari’s case, remarks about how Hideyoshi would now indeed be able to harvest all the fruits in the courtyard. Mai sighed, feeling the onset of a migraine.
After ordering the maids (who had all been fleeing bare seconds ago but were now back in the courtyard drooling over Shingen) back to work, she did the same to the warlords and they all followed her to the council room like a bunch of kids who had just been told off.
Due to his size, Kenshin could only manage to fit his head inside the room but that did not stop him from participating in the insults that were flying around.
Only Nobunaga was quiet and he patted Mai’s back as she pinched the middle of her eyebrows trying to stop the threatening migraine from emerging.
“Well this certainly explains the weird dream I had last night,” she finally said and everyone suddenly fell quiet as they realized the implications of her words.
“Only the beautiful mind of an angel could have come up with such a magical occurrence,” Shingen grinned at her and Mai’s cheeks went red.
“Then the solution is obvious,” Kenshin grumbled, a thin wisp of smoke escaping from a nostril. “She just needs to sleep and dream everyone back to normal.”
“That's not how dreams work. I can't just decide what to dream about!” she huffed but she was interrupted by Shigen who sidled closer to the dais.
“Perhaps I can help,” he offered, ignoring the angry red haze slowly building around Nobunaga or the fact that he was moments away from getting ripped apart by the devil himself.
“It would be a pleasure to see you slip away in the embrace of dreams. I cannot imagine a more beautiful sight as you fall asleep in my arms.”
“I agree,” Mitsunari smiled beatifically at them. “Lady Mai would indeed look very beautiful at that moment.”
The words had barely left his mouth when a loud clang echoed in the hall. Everyone froze as Mitsunari’s halo fell to the ground and rolled across the floor before landing at Masamune's paw. The spotlight that had been following him everywhere slowly dimmed before completely disappearing.
“Oh dear, it appears that you have corrupted the angel,” Mitsuhide smirked and Hideyoshi finally managed to escape from under his tail before launching himself at Shingen's head with a piercing screech.
“Just go back to bed," Ieyasu sighed amid the commotion that was now ensuing. “I'll give you a sleeping concoction.”
And indeed, soon enough everyone was back to normal. Well, almost everyone.
All the warlords stared at the hen that was now clucking hysterically in Hideyoshi's seat.
“Sooo, chicken for dinner?” Masamune proposed and barely managed to duck to avoid Mai’s flying sandal.