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“And for the first time in a long time, I finally know what I need to do for my friends. Because I don't need you in here to kill you,
When I’m right here.”
Scott woke up with a gasp. His back was pressed to the wrong ground, wings sprawled out around him. His chest ached with an unseen pressure. As his eyes cracked open the sun left him blinded, the whole world covered in a sparkling haze of light. But slowly, his eyes adjusted, and the elven king sat up. He took it all in, the pristine streets, the ornate statue of Aeor, and realised with a start that he was in Rivendell. He didn’t know why that surprised him. It shouldn’t, surely, as he was the empire's ruler! Why would he have any reason to be anywhere else? He shook his head, trying to clear away all his thoughts for a moment. Right now, all he needed to focus on was why he was laying on the ground in front of a statue built for Aeor. So he got up.
He wasn’t left alone for long though. A clear voice rang out behind the disgruntled elf.
“Scott! Hey, bro, what’re you doing down here? Jimmy’s waiting for you up at the house!” Scott, he knew that voice. He couldn’t tell where he knew it from, but he definitely recognised it. Scott turned around to face the voice, and found himself looking into tuscan red eyes surrounded by pale skin and a fluff of maroon hair.
“Xor-Xornoth?”
The man just rolled their eyes. “Well duh! Who else would it be, dummy?” Scott just stared. How could his brother be here ? His brother, the literal demon terrorising the server? The person responsible for countless deaths, the- wait. Xornoth didn’t do any of that. Xornoth was just Scott’s brother, the second heir to the crown. They weren’t- They weren’t a demon or a terroriser. Scott wasn’t sure why he would ever think that. Whatever.
“Yeah, yeah. Sorry, I- I think I'm just feeling a bit off today.” Xornoth cocked their head to the side and chuckled.
“Seems like it! Now c’mon! You wouldn’t want to keep the husband-to-be waiting, would you?” Xornoth wiggled their eyebrows and grabbed Scott’s elbow, pulling him towards their extravagant manor atop a hill. Husband-to-be? Scott was baffled, but something about that phrase just seemed… right. So Scott let Xornoth lead him away, ignoring the confusion he was feeling. Scott took the opportunity to examine himself and his brother more closely. Both of them were wearing traditional elven robes, in gold and blue and red and white respectively. The main differences were in their head wear. Sitting atop Scott’s shock of teal hair was an ornate silver crown, and he could feel more ornaments swinging from his antlers. Xornoth wore a much thicker golden crown, and their curved horns were left bare aside from a golden cap on the end of the left one. Everything seemed normal to Scott; he knew for sure that these outfits at least matched his, admittedly patchy, memory. But one thing did stand out to him.
Hanging around Scott’s neck was a simple leather cord, with a bright yellow feather hanging on the end. One of Jimmy’s , his brain supplied. Wait, one of Jimmy’s? Then Xornoth’s earlier statements came to mind. “Husband-to-be” they had said. “Jimmy’s waiting for you up at the house!” Oh. Oh shit . Scott’s getting married to Jimmy of all people? The fiery ruler of the Cod empire? The fool who seemed entranced by Scott even as he was ridiculed by him? The absolute buffoon who always seemed to be in the worst places at the worst possible times? That Jimmy? The ruler who showed up late to every meeting, generally shirtless and dripping with seawater? The idiot with weirdly buff arms from swimming? The beautiful dumbass that somehow swindled an alliance out of Rivendell? Oh god, Scott was so screwed.
“So, Uh, What’s Jimmy doing at our house?” Scott asked while being dragged up the path.
“Cooking dinner. Y'know, like he always does?” Xornoth raised an eyebrow as he walked. “Aeor above, you really do seem off today.” Scott choked a bit at the mention of Jimmy cooking. Damn, he thought. Attractive and a chef. Scott remembered when he first went over to the Cod Empire after their “date”. He had walked into the humble cottage that Jimmy called home and was greeted with the salty scent of baking fish and seaweed rolls. Everything Jimmy had made that night tasted amazing, and afterwards they went outside and- and they- Scott couldn’t seem to recall what they had done after the dinner. Or before it really. He knew that he had flown over to Jimmy’s empire, but he didn’t have any recollection of getting dressed beforehand or making plans in the first place. It was like something was just- gone. Scott was knocked out of his thoughts as a door creaked open and a new voice joined his brother’s.
“Scott, Xornoth! What took you so long, I’ve been cooking up here all alone!” Jimmy, who was apparently Scott’s fiance, stood in front of the sink, rinsing off dishes. Looking around Scott could see the dining table laden with home cooked food. A loaf of bread, still steaming, plates of fresh greens and bowls of aromatic broth. Everything looked amazing, but something still just felt off to the elven ruler. Scott found himself standing still and looking at the table far longer than he probably should’ve. He nearly jumped out of his skin when he felt a pair of warm arms wrap around his waist.
“Aeor, you scared me Jimmy!” The man in question just giggled and squeezed Scott a little tighter.
“You’re jumpy today, usually I can’t even get you to flinch!” Jimmy giggled again. It didn’t quite suit him.
“Uh- Yeah I think I’m just feeling a bit odd right now.” Scott twisted out of Jimmy’s arms and walked toward the table. “Why don’t we eat now?” Jimmy easily agreed and the pair walked over to the table and sat across from each other. Jimmy started listing off what each dish was, and Scott nodded absent mindedly. He spooned broth into his mouth robotically, feeling tense and on edge even as all the food tasted perfect and comforting. It reminded him of his childhood, when he would get sick and the chefs would make simple broths for him to eat in bed. Come to think of it, he could also recall the crisp salads that would be prepared just before spring with the young buds of plants not yet poking through the snow. Slowly, using the warm memories as an anchor, Scott felt his muscles start to relax. He joined Jimmy in conversation and they ate and laughed together just like they always did. Jimmy cut slices of bread for each of them, and Scott was instantly hit with a wave of nostalgia. The loaf was sweet and airy, just the way it was always prepared for Scott. Just the way it was always prepared in Rivendell . The bread turned stale in Scott’s throat.
This wasn’t Jimmy’s cooking, was it? Jimmy would always use ingredients from his home when cooking, but Scott couldn’t taste anything but Rivendell. Jimmy didn’t even know how to make the elven bread from Scott’s childhood. He would make small, salty rolls, not large, sweet clouds. He would steam greens, not serve them raw. Even the broth wasn’t right; there wasn’t a hint of the signature seaweed flavour that made its way into all of the soups from the Cod Empire. Scott set down his utensils and stood up from the table.
“I’m going to bed now. Thank you for the meal Jimmy.” His voice sounded dead even to his own ears.
“Oh, alright then.” Jimmy looked disappointed, staring at Scott like a kicked puppy as he pushed his chair back and got up as well. “Sleep well, petal!” He walked over and pressed a kiss to Scott’s forehead. His lips felt cold and unnatural, and it was only then that Scott realised Xornoth hadn't been at the dinner.
The next morning Scott woke up early. He slowly stretched out his wings and arms, feeling each bone pop back into its proper spot. He groaned and yawned before getting up and pulling back the heavy curtains in his room. The space was lit up with the dazzling rays of light being reflected off of fresh snow. Everything outside was just as beautiful as inside, and Scott smiled. Today was going to be another great day.
(Somewhere, in the back of Scott’s mind, he remembered thinking the same thing the day he died.)
Scott got dressed, donning a simple white tunic trimmed in gold over a pair of white trousers. He left his horns unadorned except for the golden band shaped like a fish. Jimmy had given it to him as one of his (numerous) courting gifts. Scott hadn’t gone anywhere without it since. Jimmy had a matching ring that was always wrapped around his left pinkie finger. His resembled a feather instead of a fish though. Scott stared into the mirror for a moment longer, rubbing the metal fondly. Then he turned and walked down the hall and descended a staircase, ending up back in the kitchen.
“Scott! Good morning, darling!” Jimmy was already in the room, pouring hot water into a set of delicate tea cups. Scott could smell the elderflower from where he stood. Huh. Scott assumed Jimmy would still be asleep. The sun had barely risen over the mountain's peak, and Jimmy was a notoriously heavy sleeper. Oh well. Scott supposed that it certainly wasn't a bad thing to have tea already made for him when he woke up. “Dinner was so nice last night, wasn’t it? I’m so glad you were there!” Jimmy’s smile was sincere and shining, his laughter was bubbling and bright. Scott nodded along, trying to remember last night's dinner. It was fuzzy, but he could recall laughing and talking with Jimmy as torches flickered happily behind them. Jimmy had made him seaweed rolls, stuffed with rice and mushrooms. It had been delicious. Scott picked up one of the filled tea cups and gently blew on it before taking a sip. Oh. That was odd. Scott swore he smelled elderflower, but the cup he was drinking had the gentle flavour of jasmine. He must’ve imagined the scent. He started walking toward the dining table, Jimmy following.
“So, Jimmy, what would you like for breakfast?” Scott set down his tea and walked towards the cupboards. The cod hybrid looked up from where he was cutting a pear into thin slices.
“Oh! Anything is good as long as we can cook together!” Jimmy smiled at Scott, and they got to work. Scott thawed and diced the snow geese they kept in an ice chest, Jimmy worked on slicing an array of fruits, then plating them into intricate shapes. The two worked in harmony, softly chatting and bumping elbows ever so often. They spoke about nothing, yet it felt like everything just because they were the ones speaking. As knives sliced and steam rose, Scott felt more lucky than he ever had before. He got to live with the love of his life, and nothing could be better. Jimmy knocked over a jar of the rice Scott had been about to cook, but even then they could only laugh. The two rulers truly couldn’t be more perfect for eachother.
Scott dished out the fried rice he had prepared, and the couple ate together, sipping still warm jasmine tea and munching on all kinds of sliced fruit. The meal ended all too soon for Scott’s taste, but eventually Jimmy stood up and started clearing plates away. He claimed to have a royal fitting today, something about a surprise outfit for the upcoming wedding. Scott pouted at not being allowed to see, but relented and gave Jimmy a chaste kiss with an eye roll.
“Well, if you really must go, then I suppose I’ll have to find a way to occupy myself while I sit all alone in this big, empty house,” Scott said with all the sincerity of a con artist. He put his hand up to his forehead in faux offence, just to hear Jimmy’s perfect laugh once more. Scott kissed his fiance’s nose again, then moved to walk out of the dining hall. “I’ll see you soon, Love! I’ll be over at Grimlands if you need me, I still need to shore up those trade agreements with Count Fwhip we discussed last week.” At that however, Jimmy froze in his place, turning around to face Scott again.
“Uh- Scott? We already dealt with that, remember?” He giggled, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. Like he wasn’t trying to cover up a moment of panic. “Fwhip is going to be shipping us the gunpowder in exchange for wool and dark oak. You don’t have to worry about it anymore!” He smiled, but Scott felt like he could see something off about it. Maybe it was a slight quirk in his lips, maybe his teeth were just a touch too shiny. Whatever it was, Scott suddenly felt on edge. He decided to test his theory.
“Well, if that’s the case then maybe I’ll go visit Queen Lizzie for the afternoon.” Panic washed over Jimmy’s face again. “Or I could stop by The Undergrove for a bit.” More shock. “Perhaps King Joel would appreciate a meeting, or-”
“That will not be necessary, darling !” Jimmy's voice went shrill for a moment. It didn’t sound like the man Scott knew. “You know, I actually just remembered that you were meant to help teach the village children in the library today!” His voice had calmed, and his smile was back. “You were so excited about it, how could you forget? Just think about it, the humble Emperor of Rivendell, helping aspiring scholars learn their letters!” Scott’s head felt more and more fuzzy the more Jimmy spoke, like his mind was being stuffed with cotton. He found himself nodding along. Teaching kids did sound nice. And it would hopefully encourage his citizens to keep him in power for even longer. Jimmy helped lead him towards the correct door and kissed his forehead.
“Have a good time, Petal!” Scott smiled back at him and nodded nervously.
“I hope those children aren’t too mean.”
“Oh I’m sure you’ll do perfectly, just don’t worry about it. Now, I really do need to head out- I'm already late for my fitting, -but I love you, Scott! I’ll see you later!” With a final blown kiss, Jimmy disappeared down the hall, leaving Scott in front of the library door. He took a deep breath, and pushed the spruce barrier out of his way. You can do this , He had thought.
(If only that were true.)
By the end of the long, long, day, Scott was properly exhausted. Trying to wrangle a hoard of excited school children would do that to a guy. Especially when some of said school children had wings that they liked to flare out. So, as the sun began to set, Scott sighed and walked out to the gardens. He liked it there, the cold air grounding him and the flowers keeping him calm. No one but the royal family was allowed inside the winding paths, and the privacy allowed the young emperor to drop his guard, if only for a moment. Which was why it was so surprising to see someone else, sitting on a stone hewn bench in the distance. Xornoth.
“Hey! Xornoth!” Scott started walking towards the man. Their head was bowed down, but as Scott approached they slowly lifted it up, red eyes shining. Something about them looked wrong. It wasn't a concrete issue, and Scott felt more and more unnerved as he looked at them. “Xornoth?” They still didn’t respond. All of Scott's tiredness was replaced with anxiety within a moment. “Hey, hey, are you okay?” No reaction. Just the same passive stare, glinting up through strands of unkempt hair. Scott stopped in front of them and put his hands up slowly. “I’m going to sit down next to you, okay?” After a moment of watching his brother for any signs of distress, Scott sat, keeping his wings tucked in and his hands in sight. Xornoth turned to keep looking at him and Scott finally got a good look at their face. It was… wrong.
Their lips were twisted down like they were slipping off of the pale skin around them. Their eyes were in the correct places, but they seemed to glow and shift under the irises. Their nose was elongated and twisted out of shape. It was like their whole face was broken and put back together by someone who didn't really know what a humanoid was meant to look like. Everything was just off enough to turn a once beautiful elf into a monster . Yet Scott found himself entranced, unable to look away from the amalgamation that was now his brother's face. “Xor-Xornoth?” His voice shook as he stared at the blank, twisted man in front of him. “Can you- can you hear me?” Their ears twitched, and Scott winced as he saw that where they were once adorned with gems and metals, chunks of flesh were now missing, holes and tears surrounded by gnarled scar tissue. “I'm going to touch your shoulder now, okay? I'm not going to hurt you.”
Scott reached out, and as soon as his hand touched his brother's arm, Xornoth shuddered and blinked rapidly. Scott drew back in alarm, and Xornoth’s hand shot out to grab Scott’s wrist before he could fully remove it. Then they began to speak.
“Leave. You need to- Oh, Hey, bro, what’re you doing down here?- Leave. Leave. Stuck- Please- Now c’mon! You wouldn’t want to keep the husband-to-be waiting- Pain. You have to lea-” Xornoth kept frantically switching between panicked warnings and random greetings. Scott couldn't keep up.
“I- listen, listen, you need to calm down okay Xornoth?”
“Stuck- Stuck here- Need to leave- Let me- Well duh! Who else would it be, dummy?- Leave. Leave. Stuck. Leave. Stuck-” Xornoth shuddered again, their whole body twitching before they stopped moving completely. Their grip on Scott’s wrist went slack, and Scott scrambled back, nearly falling off the bench before he caught himself with a flap of his wings. He stood up and looked down at his now still brother. Even their eyes had closed this time, and something about it felt oddly final to Scott. He couldn't figure out why. He reached a hand out, tentatively reaching for their shoulder once more. But this time, nothing happened. Xornoth stayed still and unresponsive. Scott shuddered and stepped back. He needed to find Jimmy, tell him what happened. Jimmy would know how to help. The elf flipped around, preparing to fly up to the palace, but he was stopped when he saw the very man he was about to go find standing a few feet away.
“Jimmy! Oh thank Aeor, I need your help please, please I don’t know what happened and something is wrong with Xornoth, and- and-” His rant was cut off by a soft shushing noise from Jimmy, and the feeling of cool hands holding his face.
“Shh, shh, it’s okay Scott. You just need to take a deep breath for me, okay Petal?” Jimmy’s voice was so gentle and comforting that Scott almost forgot why he was so upset in the first place. Almost.
“No- No, it’s not okay, it’s not okay! Xornoth is hurt, or, or, gah! I don’t know but something is wrong !” Jimmy sent him a sympathetic smile and ran his fingers through Scott’s hair. His expression was one of such pity that it almost made Scott sick.
“Scott, Love, Xornoth is completely fine. They moved out years ago, remember? They went to explore the Nether to study its magic.” Jimmy's hand stilled on Scott’s head, and he frowned. “You've been forgetting a lot lately.”
Scott took a step back, Jimmy's hand tearing out his hair at the sudden movement. “What are you talking about! They’re sitting right-” Scott flipped around to face the bench. “-...here?” The bench was empty. “...What?” Scott looked baffled, wings fluffed up and agitated. “They were- We- But- Right here-” Jimmy stepped up behind him and started softly running his hands through Scott’s wings. It felt unnatural, and Scott tried to twist away but Jimmy’s grip just got tighter.
“Let’s go back to the house, Love. I don’t think all this cold air is good for you.”
“No! No, you don’t understand! Xornoth was here, I know it! They- they kept saying to leave, and-” Jimmy shushed him again, and the hands in Scotts wings were starting to make his head go fuzzy and warm again. They started walking out of the gardens, slowly, and Scott craned his neck to look back at the bench one last time. Other than the memory of his brother, Scott couldn’t see anything out of his place. Thinking about it made his head hurt. He sighed and gave into the warmth of Jimmy’s embrace. Maybe he did need to go inside.
Pain. He felt the fire coursing through his veins, burning him from the inside out. He flew around frantically, wings broken and twisted out of shape. His voice was hoarse as he called out for someone, anyone to come save him. The whole world was bruning. No one was coming, he knew deep down. He saw a figure on the ground and dove down, wings screaming at the sudden movement. His feet hit the ground and pain jolted up his legs. He ignored it and ran forward anyways, kneeling down next to the figure on the ground. He knew this person, didn’t he? Their skin was a deep blue colour, and their pink hair was splayed out around them like a halo. Their body was burnt and mangled, and Scott forced himself to turn away. A crown lay soaked in blood next to them. Scott mourned the loss, even as he couldn't recall their name. He moved on. Stumbling around over the broken land, Scott came across many more wounded and dead. A king in purple and green robes impaled on a spire of dark rock, blood still sluggishly pouring out of their destroyed body. A woman in green, crushed flowers scattered around their corpse, arrows sticking out of their eyes and throat. Each one sent a pang of loss and misery through Scott’s barely beating heart. But still he moved on, kept walking, kept hurting, until he found Them.
They stood above the carnage, dark tendrils of disease reaching out and corrupting the land around them. The flames of this burning world reached toward them and caressed their cracked skin with pain and fire. Scott knew them. He knew them well. His brother. Their horns were twisted and elongated, and their skin was transformed into plates of void, purple and red fire leaking out from between the cracks. Their mouth was pulled into a permanent smile. Seeing Xornoth like that made Scott want to hurl. They just kept smiling, staring down at Scott through sightless eyes. They held out a sword, silver metal twisted and warped, runes glowing black on the surface. They offered it to Scott, blade first. Scott gripped the jagged edge and pulled it towards himself. He knew it was what he was meant to do. As the metal slipped into the waiting flesh of his chest, he barely felt the pain. Once he couldn’t make his arms move anymore, his brother shoved it all the way through Scott’s body, a wet gasp being pulled from his throat. His eyes shut, and his body finally gave up. Xornoth’s smile stayed all the same.
Scott woke with a start, his body covered in cold sweat and his breath coming out in sharp gasps. He clutched frantically at his chest, trying to pull a sword out of his chest. There was nothing there. His breath started to calm down, the ache in his chest began to diminish. What the hell was that? Just thinking of his rather vivid dream sent more unease through him, so the elf got up and stared out the window. Even the moon didn’t look right. It was too bright, too round. Jimmy's words from earlier came back to him. “ I don’t think all this cold air is good for you”. Scott disagreed. Something was so intrinsically wrong with his life right now, and Scott needed to figure out what it was. And all the signs were pointing outside the palace. So He carefully unlatched his window and pushed it open, wincing at the creak of the hinges.
He pushed off of the windowsill, wings spreading gracefully to catch his fall and let his momentum guide him outside the edges of the palace. Past the gardens, past the ponds, and finally past the statue of Aeor that guarded the land. Everything was quiet and calm, like the world was holding a breath. Even the air was still, not a breeze stirring nor a wind whistling. Scott let himself glide, wings fluffed up against the cold, until he reached the edge of the empire. Then he touched the ground to investigate. Before, the edge of Rivendell had been marked by the forest that circled the base of the mountains, but now it was quite literally an ‘edge’. Where there should’ve been trees, the ground just dropped off into a pool of darkness. No cliff, no drop. Just pure, unbroken void. Staring into something so endless seemed to kickstart something in Scott’s brain.
He started to remember . He remembered the truth, that Xornoth was corrupted and destroyed the empires, that Scott never got to propose because of his final battle against his brother. Scott realised that his nightmare was much more real that he ever anticipated. He remembered the blade from his dream, and remembered the blade from his life. They were one and the same, even if one was twisted almost past the point of recognition. Scott remembered the cut of the rune blade, crudely shoved through his stomach. He hadn’t even died right away. It just hurt for a long time, before his body finally gave up and shut down for the last time. Scott was… He had… Died. He was Dead. This wasn’t a reality, it was Death. Final, permanent, Death. Looking back now, he could see all the things he had missed. The Jimmy in his mind trying to keep him happy and oblivious, the false version of his brother trying to warn him. Now he understood. He almost wished he didn’t. How… How am I meant to go back after this? How am I meant to face Ji- That illusion, without feeling sick? What… What am I meant to go now?
Yet it seemed that he wouldn’t have to ever find out. As he started into the endless pool of darkness, it lost its patience. Tendrils of cool void crept ever closer to the confused elf, until they could start to wrap up his legs and pull . Scott looked down a moment too late, and fell to the ground with a shout. The darkness was cold, a terrible, burning ice that wormed their way into Scott’s very soul. And then they dragged him back, eager to claim a new victim. Scott started to panic, realising that this wasn’t going to stop.
He flapped his wings helplessly, the pull of the void yanking out feathers and dragging him back. His fingers scrambled for purchase on the icy ground, but found nothing. He was dying. He was going to die. Would it hurt? It hurt last time. Scott didn’t want to die. He didn’t want to, not again, not again ! He couldn’t, he couldn’t die again, he couldn’t handle it. He could feel the void start to pull harder, could feel blood starting to pour from his wings as more feathers were torn away. Please, please stop, I can't die. A sob escaped his throat as skin started to flake off his legs. Please I should’ve never left the palace, Should’ve stayed oblivious, should’ve stayed with Jimmy .
Scott remembered each of his favourite moments with the cod hybrid. Going on a “date” for an alliance meeting, watching the sunrise from the mountain tops, just because Jimmy had never seen it before, holding hands under the table at House Blossom meetings. Jimmy’s soft smile as he looked at Scott with loving eyes. If only Scott could apologise for leaving. If only he could see that smile one last time. And then he did. Jimmy stood above him, his face unreadable.
“Jimmy- Jim- Please, please I don’t want to die, please I’m sorry I won’t leave again, please, please-” Jimmy just looks down on him, and smiles slightly.
“It’s okay Scott. You didn’t like it here anyway.” He looked almost resigned as he spoke. “We’ll be together next time, promise. We always will be. Maybe it’ll be better for us.” He shook his head and his smile started to fall. “I will miss you though.” He took a breath and stepped forward, feet right in front of Scott’s hands desperately clawed into the ground. He raised his foot and stepped down on the delicate bones, feeling each one snap as Scott screamed and lost his grip. “Goodbye, Scott.” The last thing Scott saw before he was dragged into the starless void was a single tear on Jimmy’s cheek. Dying didn’t hurt quite so much this time.
Warmth. The first thing Scott felt was a soft comforter surrounding him. He was so cosy that the temptation to simply fall back asleep nearly consumed him. But then he remembered. He couldn’t get everything, and the details were all fuzzy, but Scott knew that something awful had just happened. He remembered being in Rivendell, in… in an afterlife. Then he remembered being pulled out of the world. That wasn't good. That hurt. A lot. Scott shivered and went to check his wings for any remaining injuries, but when he turned over to look, there was nothing there. He didn't have any wings. Was he supposed to have them? He couldn't remember. So he moved on. A quick scan of the rest of his body revealed no injuries other than a raging headache, and Scott decided that he was probably good enough to sit up without issue.
So he got up. He realised that he recognised the house he was in, with its stone walls and lack of windows. He had built this, buried into the side of a mountain, right across from… Jimmy. Jimmy. Scott didn't know what to think about that. Would he be here? Did Scott want him to be here? He supposed there was only one way to find out, so he walked to the front of his house and pushed the wooden door open. The sun blinded him immediately, but after a moment of covering his eyes he was able to see outside his home. He knew this place well. Slowly, Scott walked down the steps of his entryway and made his way to the ground. There was a pond to his right and fields to his left. And standing there, cutting down stalks of wheat, was Jimmy.
“Hey! Scott! You're finally up!” The blond haired man straightened up and started walking towards Scott.
“Uh-” Scott froze as Jimmy caught him in an embrace, and Jimmy pulled back immediately.
“Petal? Everything alright?” Scott shook his head, and Jimmy frowned. “Okay, well, let's sit down and then you can tell me what's going on. Does that sound okay?” One nod later, and the couple was sitting next to their pond on a picnic blanket. Scott sat up straight, posture stiff. Jimmy slouched, back bent casually. “Do you want to tell me what's wrong, Love?”
“I-” Scott cut himself off, then started over. “I just- listen, Jimmy, this- this isn't right.” His hands were clasped tightly in his lap, nails leaving crescent moons on his smooth skin. Jimmy just cocked his head to the side, expression puzzled.
“Isn't right? What do you mean?”
“I mean- Listen. I know this will sound crazy, but I wasn't here just a minute ago. I was- I was in an elven city, my city. And- and you were there, and I think I had a brother? I don't know, but it was- it was an afterlife! We were dead! And then the void was there, and it was so cold , and, and-”
Jimmy picked up his hands, gently separating them and wiping off the blood that dripped off his nails and hands. He hadn't even noticed his grip had gotten that tight.
“Hey, Scott. I don't know what you went through, but let's take a deep breath, okay?” He sucked in an exaggerated gulp of air, and Scott slowly followed suit, breath evening out and calming down. “Good, good. Now, Petal, how much do you remember about where we are right now?”
Scott squinted and looked around at the cliffs surrounding their little home. Vines dripped off of them, and a waterfall trickled softly down to the pond. “I recognise this place. I know that I helped build your house. I know we lived here together. But everything else is… fuzzy.” Jimmy nodded, then sucked in a breath.
“Listen, I- I need to tell you something that I don't think you're going to love. So just, don't freak out, okay?” Scott nodded, looking nervous. “This… this is an afterlife as well. You and I, we both died.” Scott visibly paled.
“We- again? Why… How did it happen?”
“It was a game of sorts, with our friends. Well, we were friends before anyways. I- I died first and you lost it a little bit. But then you showed up here and it's been great! And hey, if we met in not one, but two afterlives that's gotta mean something, right!” He laughed, sounding more like he was comforting himself than anyone else. “That's gotta make us like, like, soulmates! Or something!”
Scott stood up. “I’m going to explore a bit. Is it possible to leave this area?” Jimmy looked sad but not surprised at Scotts sudden outburst.
“Yeah, the world border is still up but other than that we're free. Scott maybe I should go with you-”
“No!” Scott yelled, panicked. “No, I need to go myself.”
“Okay, Petal. Please be careful, okay?”
Scott left. He found the gate leading out of their cliffs and wooden walls, and he traced a delicate hand on the border containing the world. The nearly invisible shine of the barrier was oddly comforting to the man, and he found himself following it, travelling around the entire land. It didn’t take long for something to feel wrong again. He didn’t find a void, didn’t find another death, but he did find a castle. It was hewn of stone, with granite roofs and a long dried up moat circling the base. Scott walked to the entrance and traced the burn marks in the wooden door. Then he remembered.
A man, tan with short dark hair, running panicked through the castle halls. He jumps into a column of water, a mix of technology and magic that flings him straight to the top of the castle in seconds. But he doesn't break the surface of the water this time. This time, he hits a ceiling of rock. And then the stone starts to crumble and melt as he's pressed desperately against it. Molten rock pours onto his unprotected face, and he doesn't even have time to scream before he is burnt beyond recognition. Another life gone.
Scott gasps and pulls his hand off of the charred wood as soon as his consciousness comes back. He can't shake the feeling that this man's death was just a part of the ‘game’ Jimmy mentioned. Did anyone care that he died? Did anyone know the pain he felt? Deep down, Scott knew the answer to those questions. Later, the dead man would get angry at those who set a trap for him, and the perpetrators would laugh. They would laugh and offer him a coffin, uncaring of the death they caused. Scott didn't like that feeling. He moved on.
Next he found tall wooden walls. They surrounded a building that looked like it used to house something important. It probably did. There was trampled farmland and broken paths. There were scorch marks and splintered arrows. And finally, there was a stone altar. Splatters of long dried blood covered the surface, and despite his best judgement, Scott leaned down and brushed his hand over the stone. It was cool and rough, and sent a metallic taste into Scott's mouth, strong enough to almost make him gag. And once again a memory played.
Everyone always said love and hate were two sides of the same coin, but the Hand never believed it until he was forced to stand above his King, sword poised on his ruler’s neck. He loved his King more than words could ever describe, yet in this moment he hated him with every fibre of his being. The Hand, slaying the King. It wasn't right. The King claimed he would come back stronger, smarter, better. The Hand didn't care. He didn't want to be better. He just wanted to be good enough, wanted to be safe with his King. But right now was not the time for wants. Now was the time for needs. So by the order of his longest friend, of his strongest ally, of his lover, he swung his blade down in a deadly arc. Closing his eyes couldn't stop the sound of the King’s head falling to the stone or the thump of the body that followed it. He heard the crown clatter to the floor, and without opening his eyes the Hand turned and walked stiffly away. It was time for the King to rise again.
Scott pulled his hand back, sucking in a breath at the onslaught of emotion he got from the land. He… he remembered that King, remembered fighting him. And he remembered the Hand. He was the one to kill Jimmy, wasn’t he? Scott didn’t know why he kept walking. He could’ve just gone back to the safety of his home, he knew he could, but something in him wanted to see what would happen if he continued. He needed to keep going, if only for the satisfaction of remembering the truth. So he continued his journey. He found more half destroyed bases, more destruction and more burnt ground, but nothing stood out until he reached the edge of a desert. Scott didn't need to see more memories to know that something awful had happened there.
In the centre of the sand, there was a squat building, half buried but still intact. And in a semicircle around that there was… a chasm. It looked like the earth itself had just given up on holding the sand above it. Shadowing the destruction was a cliff of jagged sandstone, topped with another crumbling building. Everything about the area screamed pain, enough so that Scott wasn't sure that he wanted to be there. But he needed to understand what was happening. So he steeled himself and took the first step into the desert. Immediately he was bombarded with a feeling of nausea far more intense than anything he had ever felt. It took all of his effort just to keep from throwing up, and it distracted Scott enough for him to not realise that there was no memory or feeling accompanying the pain this time. Slowly, roughly, Scott lifted his head and took a single step forward. He needed to be further in, needed to be where it started. Where it ended? He wasn’t sure. But he knew, somewhere deep down, that this would be the last memory he would get to see. And it was housed on the broken tower atop the cliff. So, step after pained step, Scott made his way to the wreckage, first trudging through sand and then half crawling up the rubble that used to be called stairs.
The nausea only got stronger. Scott thought he may have thrown up at some point, but his vision was so blurry and his body hurt so much that it was hard to be sure. He continued on. He didnt really know why. He was equal parts drawn to the tower and dragged away from it. But eventually, through a mix of sheer luck and willpower, he made it. With tears burning his eyes and dripping onto the fiery sand, Scott brushed his knuckles against the broken walls of the tower. His vision went dark immediately. Later, Scott would swear he would never condone a death game like this, would never support this amount of pain and suffering. And after that, he would sign another paper and do it all over again. But before all that, he saw the atrocities committed in this game.
It started as a joke. He hadn’t meant to kill his best friend, just scare him! But things never seem to work out that way. So they stuck together, built an empire, destroyed their adversaries. And eventually, even that ended. Deep down, he knew that the peace would never last, but a part of him just wished that it would. Even if only for a day more, for just one more sunset, one more kiss, one more whisper. Just one more. He never got that one more. Instead, he got a betrayal, an order to drive a sword through his skull. Instead he got an apology, the offer to take his life in return. But he couldn’t do it. They threw down their blades, held hands and promised to stay, to win together. And it worked! For a moment at least. But as with all things, what is sown must be reaped. So framed by a ring of cacti, the sun burning red behind them, they fought. Neither wanted to win, but one couldn’t bear to lose. He stood up, not victorious, but at least alive. The blood dripped down his knuckles and stained the sand below him. He didn’t look at it. Instead he glared up at the sky, tucked his broken wings to his back, and stepped off the cliff. He was dead before he ever hit the bottom.
Scott laid in the sand for a long time. He knew what was going to happen now. Like the last world, this one would collapse and drag him down with it. Or he could… take matters into his own hands. He thought of the man, glaring up at the sky, one last act of futile defiance. He wondered who that man saw in the sky. Was it the friends he killed? Was it a god? Maybe it was just the universe. Oh well, it seemed that Scott would find out whenever the world saw it fit. He didn’t know. He didn’t care. Did he care? He was just so tired. He just wanted it to end, just wanted a break. So following in the footsteps of those far wiser than him, he stepped up to the cliff's edge and took in a breath.
Until death did them part.
Scott opened his eyes to the beautiful sight of the Sheriff sitting above him, hands carding through Scott’s hair. They were sprawled in the middle of a flower field, poppies and clovers sprouting all around them as Scott laid with his head in Jimmy’s lap. Jimmy was rambling on about something vague and inconsequential. It didn’t matter what it was about; the mere sound of the sheriff’s voice was enough to make a sleepy smile appear on Scott’s face.
“Oh! Hi Dear! I didn’t realise you woke up!” Jimmy looked down and beamed at Scott, face bright and shining. “Are you okay? There are tears on your face.” His eyebrows furrowed and he swiped a thumb over Scott’s cheek to wipe them away. “I didn’t upset you did I? Oh void I messed up didn’t I! I must’ve-” Scott cut him off with a finger lifted to his lips. Truth be told, he didn’t even know he had been crying, but he did know it wasn't Jimmy’s fault.
“No, no you have done anything wrong.” Scott’s voice was rough and crackly from sleep. “I think I just had a… bad dream.” (It wasn’t a dream, and he knew it, but that was okay. For now he didn’t need the truth) ”I’m fine, don’t worry.” Jimmy visibly relaxed and nodded his head.
“Okay, that’s, that’s good to hear.” He scrunched his nose up and did his nervous giggle that never failed to melt Scott’s heart. They laid there for a long time more, laughing and talking for as long as they pleased.
Somewhere, those who Watch tied another knot into their strings of fate, and somewhere, Scott found himself helplessly in love once more.
If only it could last.