Work Text:
The fresh air was supposed to have been good for Buck. A small hike that he had done a million times. The stillness and peacefulness of the nature around him was supposed to help him clear his mind and his heart, reassuring him that he had done the right thing by breaking up with Taylor. A nice hike that gave him a workout and at the same time allowed him to sift through his thoughts and feelings and to focus on what he really wanted.
Instead, he’s stuck in the middle of nowhere at a rest stop watching some asshole drive away in his jeep.
“Come on!” Buck shouted; his voice lost in the thick cloud of dust his rapidly disappearing jeep kicked out as it sped away. He kicked a rock, watching it bounce against the road before it came to a stop.
“That’s just great,” Buck growled, watching one of his most prized possessions disappear from his life.
Briefly, Buck wondered if this was a sign from the universe. Just another thing in his life that was leaving him behind in the dust, all alone with nobody to reach out too. His heart stuttered at the thought, and he stumbled back a step at his own dark thinking.
There’s no such thing as a curse, Eddie’s voice filtered through Buck’s mind, and he huffed lightly.
Eager to distract himself from spiralling, Buck turned to the small general store behind him, a ‘Back in ten minutes’ handwritten sign printed on a A4 sheet of paper was plastered to the front door. Buck had left his jeep for five minutes to quickly use the bathroom around the back, hoping that by the time he was done the general store would be open again and he could buy himself another bottle of water and some snacks. Only, he had come out of the bathroom around the back to see some punk hotwiring his jeep and peeling out onto the road in a squeal of tires and dust.
Huffing with frustration, Buck patted his pockets. His wallet was firmly tucked into his back pocket with his keys but with a groan his realised his phone was still in his jeep. He hadn’t bothered unhooking it from where it connected to the aux cord. Buck had made the perfect playlist for the trip up and he hadn’t planned on being long. He certainly hadn’t expected someone to steal his car. Buck kicked another loose rock, sending it flying out towards the road. Shaking his head, Buck made his way over to the general store and tried the door. It was locked, just as it had been the first time he tried it.
Lifting his hand, Buck knocked his knuckles on the glass door loudly. He waited a few seconds before doing it again.
“Hello? Is anyone there?” Buck called out loudly, straining his hearing. There was nothing but the gentle sound of the wind rustling the trees around him.
“Guess I’m waiting here,” Buck muttered to himself, dropping himself down on to the little bench. His legs splayed out as he made himself comfortable and trying not to believe that he was cursed.
The sun beat down on Buck’s face, arms, and legs as he waited for the general store to reopen. Ten minutes had well and truly passed and as time drifted by, Buck wondered if it was going to reopen that day or if he would be spending the night on the bench.
He passed the time by walking around the store, peeking into the windows to see if anyone was about. He tried the windows, but they remained firmly shut. He could picture Athena’s exasperated and disappointed look, the phantom pain of being on the end of one of her scolding’s enough to stop him from trying to break in.
Buck laid on the bench, soaking up the sun and listening to the world around him. It’s not the hike he envisioned himself on, but it was peaceful, and he allowed himself to drift slightly. His thoughts circled back to Taylor, and he knew, deep down that he was right to break up with her.
He wanted to love her. He thought he did. But it wasn’t the love that he wanted. The truth was, they weren’t right for each other. They wanted different things and had different priorities. Buck wanted to be happy, to be totally, fully, and completely in love. To have a family to come home to at the end of the day. For them to see him at his complete worse and still love him through it all.
Buck tried valiantly to ignore the little voice in his head that said he already had that.
Eddie and Christopher – his favourite Diaz boys.
Buck hauled himself up off the bench, taking another walk around the general store to keep himself from going down that rabbit hole. Buck had always been a little bit in love with Eddie but now it was all he could think about, and his traitorous heart ached at the thought of not having him the way Buck wanted him.
Another reason as to why breaking up with Taylor had been for the best. His heart had already belonged to another, he just hadn’t known it at the time when he had tried giving it away.
Buck spotted a small garden, and he made his way over to it. He dropped to his knees in front of it, focusing on pulling out the weeds and tidying it up. He kept his mind distracted by trying to remember facts about the plants the owners had put in. When the weeds were gone, Buck searched for a hose and found one. Thankfully, it worked, and Buck took a big drink from it before washing his hands. He hauled the hose over to the garden, giving it a good water.
He was nearly done when a car pulled up to the general store, pulling into the spot that had a sign above it that read staff parking. An older woman climbed out; her greying hair pulled into a messy bun. She squinted at Buck in the sun, a wry smile on her lips.
“This your way of asking for a job?” she called out.
Buck hurried to turn off the hose. “Oh, uh, no. Sorry. Just, keeping busy until someone came by.”
“You been here long?” the woman frowned, her gaze raking up and down Buck.
Buck jogged over, wiping his palms on his shorts. He could feel the sweat running down his back, plastering his shirt to his skin and he winced at the image he was presenting. “Yeah. Not sure how long. What time is it?”
“A little after two,” the woman replied, giving Buck a curious look.
Buck winced. “Yeah, I got here around eleven.” He reached up, rubbing the back of his neck. “Someone stole my jeep while I was using the bathroom.”
The woman gasped, hands fluttering uselessly by her side. “Oh my! I am so sorry. Have you called anyone? Is someone on their way to pick you up?”
“Phone was in the jeep,” Buck explained with a wince. “And the store’s been closed since I got here.”
The woman’s face pulled into a frown, and she marched over to the front door. Her frown turned into a scowl as she saw the sign and she huffed, pulling out a set of keys. “Useless grandson. He was supposed to open for me.” She opened the door, pushing it open wide before turning to Buck. “Come on in, love. Let’s get you something to eat and drink and make some phone calls.”
“Thank you, uh -“ Buck trailed off.
“Georgia,” the owner smiled.
“Buck.”
The shop was cooler than outside, and Buck let out a little sigh of relief. Georgia shut the door behind them, ripping off the A4 sign off with an angry tut. She turned around to Buck, offering him a grandmotherly smile.
“Okay Buck. You grab yourself anything you like for a drink and something to eat,” Georgia said. “Being out in all that sun.” She clicked her tongue as she shook her head. “You’re a little pink but nothing too bad.”
“Thank you,” Buck said. “I can pay for it though. I still have my wallet, thankfully.”
“On the house,” Georgia assured him with a firm tone. “For making you wait so long.”
Buck grabbed a sports drink and a bag of chips and smiled sheepishly at Georgia when he tried to pay again. A firm look had him pushing his wallet back into his pocket. He sculled down half the drink before opening the chips and eating a handful. He ducked his head as Georgia gave him an amused look from behind the counter. She waited until Buck had eaten a bit more before taking a phone from its cradle and handing it over to him.
“Take all the time you need,” Georgia assured him before she left, giving him some privacy.
Buck thought about calling Eddie, his fingers already poised to dial his number, but a wave of embarrassment had his cheeks turning hot and he decided that Athena was probably the first person he should call so he could make a report at the same time. He contacted the LAPD, requesting to speak to Sargent Grant.
“You’re name?” the dispatcher asked on the other end.
“Evan Buckley. I’m a firefighter with the LAFD. Station 118.”
There was a tense silence on the other end. “Uh, yes. Of course, patching you through right now.”
Buck frowned at the odd encounter, but his face quickly smoothed out as he heard Athena’s voice fill his ear.
“This is Sargent Grant.”
“Hey Athena, it’s, uh, Buck,” Buck said, hand coming up to rub at the back of his neck. He could feel the heat radiating off it and hoped he was too burnt. That would make wearing his turn coat uncomfortable. His heart gave a little flop at the familiar voice and his cheeks flushed with another wave of embarrassment. “Sorry to bother you at work, but, uh, I kind of need a favour.”
There was a pause on the other end and Buck heard Athena draw in a shaky breath.
“Buck, baby, is that really you?”
Buck blinked at the term of endearment and the thick tears that were in Athena’s voice.
“Yeah,” Buck said, feeling as if he had missed a step. “It’s really me.”
“Oh my,” Athena trailed off and he heard her give a little sob. She sniffed, her voice shaking as she continued. “Buck, where are you?”
“Riverbend Creek General Store,” Buck answered promptly and then the words were spilling out of him. “I would have called sooner but some someone stole my jeep, and my phone was in there. The general store has been closed and the owner only just arrived –“
“It’s okay,” Athena interrupted Buck rambling. “I’m…I’m so glad you called. I’m coming to get you, okay. You just stay where you are.”
Buck knew he was missing something, and it filled him with a thick dread. “Athena, is everything okay? Is everyone okay?”
“It is now, baby,” Athena promised, her voice soothing. “And everyone is just fine. I’ll be there as soon as I can.”
“Okay,” Buck said softly, a thick dread still pooling in his stomach. Something was wrong and Buck hated that he didn’t know what was happening. “Thanks, Athena.”
“Any time,” Athena promised.
Buck felt his throat tighten and he uttered a goodbye before hanging up. Athena had sounded relieved to hear his voice and had called him baby. Had spoken to him the same way he had heard her talking to May and Harry. Like he was one of her kids. Something had happened; he had no idea what, but something had shaken up Athena Grant and Buck felt sick at the idea.
“Everything okay, Buck?” Georgia asked, shaking Buck from his thoughts.
“Yeah,” Buck nodded, handing back the phone. “Uh, someone’s coming to pick me up. Do you mind if I hang out here a bit?”
“Not at all,” Georgia assured him.
Buck nodded. He felt jittery, like something was crawling under his skin. He cleared his throat, shifting his weight from foot to foot. “Can I help you with anything?”
Georgia gave him a long look. She must have seen something in his expression before she gave him a soft smile. “I’ve got some boxes I need to unload. Would you mind giving me a hand?”
Buck smiled with relief. “Lead the way.”
The 118 had been taken offline as they all reeled from their last call. They were seated at the firehouse table, staring aimlessly at the table without seeing it. Nobody said a word, all to lost in their own heads to do so.
It should have been a regular call. It had started out as such – the 118 called out to a fender bender. The car had been on fire when they arrived, the crew moving quickly to stop the flames from spreading. They already knew that whoever was inside would not be coming out alive, the sight making them feel sick and cold. It wasn’t often that they got called out to an accident like this and they never got used to the sight.
It wasn’t until the flames were out, the car a smouldering burnout shell did it sink in that they were staring at what had once been a familiar jeep.
“That’s Buck’s numberplate,” Eddie had said, his voice sounding distant in his own ears. His body swayed where he stood, the world around him narrowing until he could only see the number plate.
The crew around him had frozen.
“Eddie, are you sure?” Bobby demanded, his voice shaking as he came to stand beside Eddie.
“Yeah,” Eddie choked out, unable to stop staring at the number plate that was now burnt and covered black. How many times had he watched that car pull away from his house until he couldn’t see it anymore, wishing it would come back? How many times had he ridden in that car, Christopher in the back seat laughing and singing along to the songs Buck played? “That’s…that’s Buck’s car.”
The rest of the call had been a blur and as Eddie stared at the table, the taste of vomit in his mouth he couldn’t stop the same words looping in his mind.
That was Buck’s car. That was Buck’s car. That was Buck’s car.
They hadn’t been able to confirm that it was Buck at the scene, the body too burned. Eddie couldn’t get the smell off him, no matter how hard he had scrubbed himself in the shower. But who else could it have been?
The LAPD had taken over the scene to investigate what had happened and to identify the remains. And so, the 118 had returned to the station, clouded in a haze of grief as they waited for what could be the worst or best news of their lives.
The harsh sound of a phone ringing snapped Eddie from his thoughts, his eyes landing on the mobile that was sitting at the head of the table. Athena’s name flashed on the screen sending Eddie’s heart rate climbing.
Hen and Chimney’s head snapped towards Bobby, their Captain’s hands scrambling against the table to pick up the phone. He answered it, putting it on speaker phone and felt himself holding his breath.
“Athena,” Bobby said, his voice shaking. “Have you heard –“
“It wasn’t Buck,” Athena’s voice cut Bobby off. “He’s alive. Buck wasn’t in the car.”
Hen and Chimney collapsed on in their chairs like puppet’s being cut from their strings.
“You’re sure,” Bobby demanded, eyes wide and face ashen.
“I just spoke with him,” Athena promised, her voice thick with emotions that were audible through the tiny speaker. “He’s at Riverbend Creek General Store. Someone had stolen his jeep. I’m on my way to pick him up now.”
“Thank god,” Bobby breathed out, finally relaxing in his chair. The relief that radiated from his was palpable and Eddie felt dizzy with it.
“I’m going to bring him to the house,” Athena said. “You can meet us there.”
“On it,” Bobby said. “Bring our boy home.”
“Will do,” Athena promised. “We’ll see you soon.”
“He’s alive,” Chimney said, eyes wide and a small grin lighting up his face after Bobby had hung up. A laugh of disbelief slipped from his lips. “He did it again. He’s alive.”
“That boy has nine lives,” Hen choked out with a hysterical laugh.
He was alive. Buck was alive.
Eddie pillowed his head with his arms on the table and sobbed.
Buck had been watching out the window and as soon as he saw the familiar police cruiser speeding towards the general store, he was out the door, the bell jingling in his wake. The cruiser skidded to a stop, a cloud of dust blooming in the air.
Athena stepped out of the vehicle, leaving the door open as she strode towards Buck.
“Athena,” Buck managed to get out before Athena was pulling him into a tight hug.
Buck wrapped his arms around Athena, stooping to bury his face into her shoulder, wrapping his arms around her waist as she flung her arms around his neck, squeezing him tightly.
“Evan Buckley, you have no idea how glad I am to see you,” Athena choked out.
“Pretty glad to see you too,” Buck half laughed, half sobbed.
Athena pulled back enough to cup Buck’s cheeks in her hands, her eyes tracing over him, drinking in the sight of him.
“M’okay,” Buck promised, unable to stop himself from leaning into her touch.
“Yeah,” Athena nodded, her hands trembling against Buck’s skin. “You’re here. I got you.”
Buck let her hug him again and he shuddered at the amount of emotion that Athena was showing him right now. There were very few times that Buck had seen her so vulnerable, and he wasn’t sure what had shaken her up so badly.
“Let’s get you home, yeah?” Athena finally said, pulling back.
Buck turned, finding Georgia watching the seen from the door, a small smile on her face.
“Thank you! For everything,” Buck called out to her.
“Thank you for the help,” Georgia smiled back. “Nice to meet you, Buck. Hopefully I’ll see you again.”
“Definitely,” Buck nodded.
With a wave he let Athena take him to the car and settle him into the front seat. She went around the driver’s side, climbing in and shutting the door. Her hands trembled as she put her seatbelt on, and she took a deep breath.
“I just have to make a quick phone call,” Athena said, pulling out her phone.
Buck nodded and waited silently as Athena made a call.
“Hey, hon. Yeah, I just picked him up,” Athena said, and Buck knew she was talking to Bobby. Athena turned to look at him, a fond smile on her face. “He’s fine. A little pink from the sun but he’s okay. Yeah, I’m bringing him straight home. Okay. See you soon. Love you.”
She hung up, putting the phone away before starting the car. Buck waited until they were on the road, the general store falling away behind them before he asked.
“What happened?”
Athena swallowed thickly, her hands clenching the steering wheel. “118 got a call to a vendor bender today.”
Buck leaned back in the seat, and he slid his palms up and down his thighs. Something cold and heavy settled in the bottom of his stomach.
“Let me guess; it was my jeep.”
Athena hummed loudly. “Crashed badly. The car was on fire when the 118 arrived on the scene.” Athena paused, the air thickening between them. “Eddie recognised it was your jeep. We thought… we thought you were dead.”
Buck’s hand’s curled into fists as he stared at Athena in horror. “No.”
Athena took one hand off the wheel, reaching out to grab Buck’s wrist. “He’s been told. They all have. They know it wasn’t you.”
“The scene – they should have seen it wasn’t me,” Buck chocked out, taking Athena’s hand in his.
“The body was too burned to make a positive ID,” Athena said after a beat.
Buck squeezed her hand tightly. “I’m sorry.”
“Hey,” Athena said softly. She glanced at him quickly before looking to the road. “This wasn’t your fault. Not in the slightest.” She squeezed his hand again before she gently took it back, placing it back on the wheel. “I’m taking you back to my place. Everyone is waiting for us there.”
“Is Eddie, is he okay?” Buck asked, feeling cold all over. Eddie didn’t deserve that, didn’t deserve to think that Buck was dead. Not after everything they had been through. Not when he was finally doing better. “Maddie?”
“He’s worried about you,” Athena said, glancing at Buck before looking back to the road. “He’ll be better once he can see you in person. They all will.”
“Does Maddie know?” Buck asked, heart hammering in his chest.
“Chimney didn’t want her to worry, not until we knew for sure that it wasn’t you,” Athena said. “I’m sure he’s calling her now to explain what happened.”
Buck nodded, feeling sick.
The fresh air was supposed to have been good for Buck. A small hike that he had done a million times; the stillness and peacefulness of the nature around him was supposed to help him clear his mind and his heart.
The universe was screaming at Buck, but he wasn’t sure what it was saying.
The ride back to Athena’s had been spent with idle chatter, Athena looking at Buck as often as she could. When she pulled into her driveway, Buck felt shaky.
Athena turned off the car, reaching across to take Buck’s hand in hers, squeezing it tightly. “It’s going to be okay. Just breathe.”
Buck let out a shaky breath. “I – I’m so sorry to put everyone through this.”
“It wasn’t your fault,” Athena assured him again. “And the main thing is that you are alive and still here with us.” She squeezed his hand tightly. “Now, there a whole lot of people in there who love you waiting to see that you are okay. Ready?”
Buck nodded and Athena released him so they could get out of the car. He followed Athena to the house and waited for her to open the door.
As Buck stepped in, his eyes automatically went to the living room. There, the 118, his family, was waiting for him.
It was Maddie who saw him first, rushing over as Buck descended the stairs two at a time and pulled him into a tight hug, her ear pressed to his chest, arms around his waist when he reached the bottom.
“Thank god,” Maddie whimpered, tears already running down her cheeks. “I love you so much.”
Buck closed his eyes, pressing his cheek to the top her head. “I love you too.”
They stood like that – he wasn’t sure for how long – before they pulled apart. He had barely a second before he was in the arms of Hen;
“I’m so glad you are okay, Buckaroo. Don’t ever scare us like that again or there will be hell to pay.”
Then Chimney;
“I don’t know how you keep doing it, but don’t ever stop. Glad you’re okay, brother.”
Followed by Bobby;
“I’m so glad you alive, kid. I don’t know what we would do without you. The world is a better place with you in it.”
Everyone fell away as Buck was standing in front of Eddie. His best friend looked like shit as he stared at Buck, eyes wide and full of disbelief. The ex-soldier was pale, eyes rimmed red and dark circles starting to appear.
“Evan,” Eddie breathed out.
“I’m sorry,” Buck blurted out, taking a shaky step towards the man. “Eddie, I’m so, so sorry. I never thought – I didn’t know that it was going happen, and I never wanted you to think that I was – “
Buck was cut off as Eddie wrapped one arm around his waist, the other around his neck, his hands sliding into Buck’s curls. He held Buck closer, muttering words in Spanish that Buck couldn’t pick up because Eddie was pressing his face into his shoulder.
“Dios Buck,” Eddie said into Buck’s temple, his lips brushing against Buck’s skin making it feel as if he had been set on fire. “I love you, so much.”
“I love you too,” Buck said against Eddie’s neck. The words had never felt right when he said them to Taylor but saying them to Eddie – Buck had never said anything truer in his life. The way the slid from his mouth, it was like a piece of puzzle fitting together. It was seamless and honest and made Buck feel at peace to say them out aloud.
Eddie gently pulled back, far enough for Buck to lift his head. Eddie’s hands were then cupping Buck’s face, his fingers dancing over Buck’s skin making his breath hitch as he stared at Eddie wide-eyed. He didn’t move, watching as Eddie drank him, reassuring himself that he was alive and there in his hands.
Buck licked his lips, eyes widening as Eddie’s eyes tracked the movement. Then Eddie was leaning forward, pressing his forehead against Buck’s, their noses brushing.
“I love you, Evan,” Eddie said, his breath warm against Buck’s lips. Then he was tilting his head and pressing his lips against Buck’s.
Eddie’s lips were soft and slightly chapped. The pressure was soft and firm, heat blooming under his touch that matched the heat of Eddie’s hands as they cupped his cheek, one hand sliding to cup the back of Buck’s neck.
It didn’t matter that they were in the middle of Athena’s and Bobby’s home, that their co-workers and his sister were no doubt watching their first kiss, their love declaration. Because Buck couldn’t think past the fact that Eddie was kissing him, that Eddie not only loved him but was in love with him.
The revelation that Eddie returned his feelings lit something up inside Buck that he had never felt before. It spurred him into action, his arms wrapping around Eddie, tugging him closer so they were pressed against one another. Buck deepened the kiss, catching the faint taste of mint on Eddie’s tongue as Buck licked his way into his mouth. He breathed sharply through his nose, head dizzy with joy and want and relief.
The universe was a screaming at Buck, and he thinks he’s finally understood.