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He is just about ready to head home, packing up the last few things when someone nocks on his open door.
Turning around he finds the husband of his anorexic patient standing behind him.
"Mr. DeLeon, can i help you?" He asks the man.
"Uh... my wife's decided against the valve-rapair surgery," the man begins.
Neil is irritated, studying the man, crossing his arms over his chest. He's trying to make sense of the words.
She needs the surgery, why she would decide against it, is a mistery to him.
"At least until she's tried the deep brain stimulation for her anorexia", Mr. DeLeon explains.
And suddenly, everything makes sense.
He doesn't have to think about how they know that it is a possible treatment.
Claire had been the one who suggested the DBS and she didn't seem too happy when he shot her idea down. His compliment about her work, digging it up in the first place did little to appease her. He saw it on her face, but he didn't expect her to do anything like this.
"Did Dr. Brown tell you that it's an experimental brain surgery, which could alter your wife's personality forever? That's if we get the special approval required."
"She's explained all the issues."
Or course she did. She was a great doctor, especially with the patients.
And no matter her personal opinion on a treatment plan, she wouldn't sugarcoat the risks.
Still, even though he knew it was Claire, the words hit him like a bucket of ice-water.
Mr. DeLeon turns around to leave the office and Neil leans against the next best thing for support, left alone with his thoughts.
Slowly it begins to really sink in what had happened.
Claire always wanted the best for their patients and she must've thought the DBS was the last resort. He understands her wanting to present the idea to them, to some degree.
Of course the mom and husband would agree to the treatment, they were desperate.
But she should not have went behind his back. He told her it was too risky, and he still thought so. The data was too little to use as a basis.
Neil had always respected her. She is brilliant mind, committed to her patients, to helping in general. He values her ideas and opinions.
As he told her when she suggested the treatment to him, he appreciated her effort to dig this up and do the research. He knows she has put a certain amount of time into it, putting together the folder to explain everything to him and the mother.
In many ways he admires how much work she does on any given case they work. He can always count on her to give 110% and to do what needs to be done. Maybe he has a soft spot for her. But more than anything he trusts her.
The fact she went behind his back like that, with no warning, no second approach about the DBS... Feels like a knife in his back.
How could Claire do this?
He wouldn't have been surprised if Shaun had done something like this. He is stubborn and with his lack of people skills he probably wouldn't think too much about it. If he thinks something was right or wrong he tells anyone who will listen about it. And anyone who won't.
Hell, he will probably tell the patient with Neil in the room, not even talking to him about it first. Neil thinks he wouldn't have been surprised, but annoyed regardless. Very annoyed but in the end, that's just another day working with Murphy.
With Morgan he would not expect such a move. It'd leave her in a bad light and therefore it might be career damaging if word got around she went behind the attending's back. Reznick is egoistical to an uncanny amount, will do anything that benefits her. But she's reasonable. And her own good sometimes seems to stand above the patient. She is looking for her own advantage and something like that wouldn't be helpful. He would probably have been irritated if she pulled something like that, but not even that surprised, Morgan could probably tell him exactly why she did do it and how that benefits her. Leaving him nothing but very, very furious.
He figures if Park had done this, he would've been somewhat angry. As an older person than the other residents and a former cop he knows about the chain of command, from what he's seen it's a big part of his believe system and how he sees the world. He would not break protocol. But if something were to make him do it, Neil would mostly just be pissed. Park knows better.
Each one of them he'd have a falling out with, punished them with some scut work and would eventually go back to working with them after a couple weeks and a warning, sure that they learned their lesson.
But Claire... He isn't sure how to deal with it.
He isn't mad or furious. He is annoyed, sure. But more than anything he feels hurt that she went behind his back and disappointed that it was Claire of all people. He didn't see that coming.
Something about that doesn't sit right with him. He had learned to trust her over the last two years they worked together. And she just broke it within a few hours.
Maybe he had been all wrong about her.
Although, he is still sure he has her figured out just right. Maybe he just underestimated how far she was willing to go to help a patient if she thought it was the right choice.
Or something else played into her behavior.
Part of him wants to blame Andrews. He knows what Marcus told the residents, of course they had talked about it before.
But the Chief was the one who insisted to tell Claire to be more assertive. Neil told him that she would eventually learn to take more credit on her own and to be more vocal about her ideas. But Andrews didn't think so, and now Neil had to suffer the consequences and deal with them.
Not the first time, either.
It wasn't that long ago, that Claire had complained to Andrews about the long shifts, and it hadn't been pretty. They had to work through some problems in a surgery, but he made clear that his decisions were based on reason and in the end they all managed it, he even gave Claire more responsibility than usual in the OR, respected the decision she made about the historectomy and even complimented her to Andrews later.
The thoughts about Claire and his hurt over her actions circle his mind for a long time. They are there when he goes to bed that night and when he wakes up the next morning. He thinks about it during the IRB meeting. The very one where Claire convinces him her with the DBS idea is the right way to go, but ironically not Andrews.
She makes a strong case, a good argument and hearing from the patient he has to agree: the DBS is probably the only chance she has.
Seeing Claire there only makes it all worse, though. She might as well have literally punched him in the gut. He can barley look at her, the betrayal hurting to much, the knife in his pushed in just a little bit deeper.
It all cames down to the trust that has been broken. He isn't sure if it can be rebuilt and therefore he doesn't know how, or if, he can work with her anymore.
It isn't an easy decision to make, a part of him fights against it, long after he knows it's the only way, and it hurts him almost as much as she did. But with all that between them, there's only one option: he can't have her on his team anymore.
He isn't happy with the decision he makes, but he can't see another way. More than anything, he needs to be able to trust the people he worked with. Blindly.
Unfortunately, Claire isn't one of those people anymore.
When he tells her on the balcony later that day, that she will no longer be a part of his team, he can tell she's hurt, too.
She can barely believe what he's saying, so much that she accuses him of just being unhappy with the result of vote.
He tells her that Andrews was the one who voted against her idea, and in a way he can see the irony in the situation.
And why she cannot believe he's telling her they can't work together anymore.
But he made his decision.
Even if he doesn't like it any more that she does. That's how it has to be.
Even if it hurts Claire, too. He's sure she'll still be able to learn a lot and become a great surgeon. Audrey is an amazing Doctor, too. So is Andrews.
Still, there's an ache in his heart as he leaves her alone outside that he can't explain.