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Vax knew better than most that he wasn’t a man who could keep every promise he made, it’s why he rarely made them to anyone he cared about. So when he told Shaun he’d try to come back, he meant it.
He tried really fucking hard, in fact.
Every time they had a moment’s peace between jobs, every day that came to an end where Keyleth still had the magic at her disposal to send them anywhere, every night that came when they started reminiscing about sleeping in their own beds in the Keep…
‘Hey, why don’t we take a quick trip back to Emon?’
He was fairly certain he was keeping it light enough that only Vex had begun to really notice, but the look she gave him was increasingly sharp each time.
It was still another week before they found themselves back in the major city and Vax slipped into the shadows almost before Grog could shout, “Pub crawl!”
“I’ll be back in the morning,” he said shortly before doing what he did best and making a speedy way across the city.
Gilmore’s shop stood proud and undeniable as the man himself. It was also closing if the quickly dimming lanterns were any sign, but Vax invited himself through the window as Sherri was busy locking up the front door and slipped to the staircase leading to the man’s office.
Even the narrow hallway was beautifully decorated and accessorized with things that spoke to Shaun’s tastes – the smell of fragrant spices from a small hanging lantern above, indigo and lavender silk curtains covering the windows, and a comforting heat that emanated from what Vax knew to be a small, beautifully forged stove in the center of the building.
It was like leaving Tal’Dorei and stepping into an oasis.
He kept his steps light and his ears sharp as he listened for Shaun’s voice, hoping he hadn’t missed him.
-
The sorcerer adjusted his reading glasses, tallying the sales for the day and calculating his expenses for the month. There had been an unusual number of requests for items with glamor – good for his bottom line, but he made a mental note to drop a note to the spymaster. It would be just their luck for The Clasp to be making a major move now, just when things were finally starting to feel calm again.
He let out a sharp sigh as he ran through yet another list of expected deliveries, checking them off as he went down until—
The arachnid marrow.
Late again.
Shaun put a finger to his temple and closed his eyes, drawing his power to him. “Marius, you'd better be bringing me some fine specimens, this is your third late shipment. I'll have to find someone else if you can't deliver." He felt the magic fly from him and didn’t have to wait long for its return.
Held up in Westruun. Cart confiscated. Found my suude stash. Won't make delivery.
"Of… all the stupid, irresponsible—" He dropped his ledger on the table and rubbed his eyes, fighting an incoming migraine as he let out an impressive string of Marquesian curses.
“And here I thought I was the only one who had a long day.” Vax said with a smile in his voice as he melted out of the shadows and into the doorway of the small office.
"OH— Vax’ildan!" he cried, pushing back his chair so quickly that it nearly clattered to the ground behind him.
Shaun nearly leapt across the room, embracing his lover tightly. "My darling, you're back! Oh, it's so good to see you!" he crooned, checking with both magic and his own eyes for any injuries. "How long do I have you for? A few hours or a few days? Are you hurt? Do you need anything?" he asked, heart hammering in his chest.
“Calm— calm, Shaun—” Vax’s gentle reassurances cut off in a short laugh as he rested his hands on the man’s broad shoulders. “The night at least – No, a little cold and a little tired, but no worse for wear – and everything I need right now is right here.” As he spoke, he stepped forward, steadily crowding the mage back across the small room until his legs hit the back of his chair and he dropped back into it with a short oof.
Before he could say more, Vax was climbing in his lap, settling side saddle and brushing a light hand down his chest. “Calm, my friend, it’s alright…”
Gilmore smiled and kissed his cheek playfully. "Hard to be calm when I have a lap full of handsome half elf," he teased and gripped Vax's thigh with one hand to keep him stable. "Are you really only able to stay for a night?" he asked, working to keep the disappointment from his voice.
Vax tilted his head onto Shaun’s shoulder, sinking happily into the embrace. “The night at least, hopefully more, but…” He shrugged, nestling closer. “Hopefully longer. We’ll see come morning.”
"I will do my very best to convince you to stay," Gilmore murmured, kissing gently at the nape of his companion’s neck as Vax let out a low happy hum and arched up like a cat, eyes sliding shut under the sweet ministrations.
"I enjoyed your messages while you were away. I know it's a far cry from real conversation, but it eased the ache in my heart," he said, catching Vax’s hand from where it was playing with the detailing of his robe and bringing it to his lips to brush a kiss over the carved ring.
“Not a lot to be done in twenty-five words, is there? Hard to fit in ’I’m thinking about you, I miss you, what are you wearing, when you go to bed tonight, I want you to think about me touching—” Vax clicked his tongue and opened his eyes, turning his fingers gently to brush over Gilmore’s neat beard. “See, that’s just a cruel little tease, isn’t it?”
"My own work is a poor substitute for the clever instrument of your body, my sweet songbird. But sometimes a little teasing is welcome, wouldn’t you say?” Gilmore laughed and hitched up the corner of Vax’s shirt, just far enough for the first hint of his warm skin. "Have you… thought about what I said last time you were in my lap? How I'd enjoy taking care of your every need, lavishing you with attention if you wished to submit yourself to me?" Gilmore hummed, moving his hand up under Vax's shirt to brush his thumb over a pert nipple.
Vax’s breath caught softly in his throat, trailing off in a happy sigh as he arched up into the touch. “Thought about nothing more…” He bit his lip against the low needy groan that climbed up his chest, letting his hand slide down from the magician’s robe until he found the first shining metal clasp, flicking it open with deft fingers.
“Mm—mn—” Sherri cleared her throat loudly from the bottom of the narrow staircase. “Mister Gilmooore…. I believe I’ll be heading home for the night!”
Vax snapped a hand up to cover his mouth, forcing down a strangled laugh even as his eyes lit up with mirth. Before Shaun could react, the half elf straightened, calling back. “Good night, Sherri!”
Shaun felt his face go hot, cheeks surely as pink as the satin sash at his waist. "—Sorry dear! Yes, goodnight. Thank you for dropping off that order on your way home! You're the best assistant anyone could ask for!" he called after her before dropping his voice to a sharp whisper. "You sly little devil, you knew she hadn't left yet! Not even a moment in my arms and you're already acting so naughty!"
Vax’s head fell back onto Shaun’s shoulder again, tilting back even as he laughed low and rich. It jumped up in timbre as Gilmore prodded his ribs and he squirmed sharply in the other man’s lap, still struggling for words around his giggles. “Of— course I knew she hadn’t left yet, I had to sneak by her in the first place!”
"Goodness, whatever am I going to do with you?" Shaun sighed and gave his lover a playful kiss. He pulled back before too long, chuckling at the half elf’s disappointed sigh before pressing on. "Why don’t we start with a languid soak, hm? I think you tracked in half the wilderness on your shoulders," the sorcerer teased, patting his partner’s thigh to jostle him up.
Vax blinked at the prompt, eyes moving down to his armor and wincing at the nest of pine bristles and mountain dust that clung to him. He slid from his companion’s lap gracefully, brushing the traces of dirt from his robe. “Sorry, darling.”
Shaun waved the concern away, fingers shimmering as the glittering mansion door appeared and suddenly became reality as the sorcerer gestured to it. "Shall we?"
Vax’s lips twitched as he gave Gilmore a short bow. “We shall.” With that, he stepped through into his lover’s private demi-plane.
A soft warm breeze scented with spice and saffron greeted them and Shaun let out a long sigh as the tension of the day melted out of him. “As always, my enthrala. Welcome home.”
Vax stayed close by his lover’s side, hooking an arm around him as they walked through the exquisite hall, eyes moving quickly to try to take in every sumptuous detail.
The entryway was bracketed by towering columns, purple silks draped between intricate mosaic art on each wall. Tropical birds flitted from perch to perch, and… now that Shaun thought of it, there were quite a few renderings of beings with wings along the mosaics.
Just as he caught Vax's eye wandering over them, the half elf turned to look up to him with a grin, pressing closer and Shaun felt himself flush again.
“What can I say? I got to see them up close and personal the last time we fought side by side, they… made quite an impression on me,” Gilmore smiled bashfully, pushing through a beaded curtain to the moonlit pool room.
“I see… is there artwork of me hidden somewhere in…” Before the half elf could finish the gentle jab, he looked forward and his words trailed off into a long content sigh.
A lazy river encircled two stone islands in the water that mimicked the twin moons above and stars wrapped around a false balcony motif at the ceiling’s edge. From all sides came the phantom calls of nocturnal desert creatures echoing quietly across the pristine water’s surface.
It was delightful to watch Vax’s immediately begin to relax even as his hands moved almost absentmindedly to work at the straps of his armor.
"You are the artwork, dear Vax'ildan," he said softly, stepping up behind his lover and beginning to unfasten his cloak. It was gratifying to feel the half elf’s trust in him – the way he stood dutifully still and let out a soft content sigh as he let Shaun undress him. Gratifying and… humbling.
"Now… tell me of your travels, what did you see? Who did you conquer?" Shaun teased, setting the cloak aside and moving on to his shoulder guards. "Any new treasures or harrowing trials?"
Vax let out a slightly harsher breath and Shaun felt more than saw the moment he closed his eyes. “… where to start?”
Gilmore let him stay in place even as he steadily stripped him down. Sometimes it was easier to speak without seeing, truth plainer in the dark – something else to take note of.
Vax’s voice certainly came easier than it had during previous inquiries as he continued. “We went up into the mountains… chased after a herd of stone giants for a time. Fell into a nest of manticores and found ourselves on the bad side of a succubus. You can guess some of the rest, pillaged the spoils— found some very weird things that ended up in the bag of holding, I’m sure the others won’t wait long to bring them to you, look forward to that.”
Shaun moved around to work on his breast plate and watched one brow quirk up in consideration even as he relaxed further into the gentle fingers. “It’s been an eventful handful of weeks now that I think back on it, but I….”
He sighed softly and Shaun waited. He set the breast plate aside and worked on his worn grieves and kept waiting, for whatever Vax didn’t feel like he could say to Vox Machina.
“… I don’t know entirely what it’s for anymore. I don’t know, I—” A breath of laughter caught in his throat, somehow bereft of real humor. “I… can’t… quite reconcile who we are. Too noble, too strong to go chasing after fame and fortune, but too much of a pack of assholes to stick around to be ‘Defenders of the Realm’ full time…”
Gilmore watched his partner’s eyes slide open, melancholy colouring their warm hazel depths. He set the bracers aside gently and knelt down at Vax’s feet to unbuckle his shin guards.
Vax stayed still as a statue, and for a moment there was just the meditative sounds of the evening birds singing and the quiet lapping of the waves.
Shaun was almost loathe to straighten up again as he watched the movement jar Vax from his reverie with a low chuckle. “I’m sorry, I— there are happier stories.”
“But that was something you needed to say,” Gilmore said, cupping his cheek. “You and Vox Machina are what you are, but it’s alright if those relationships change over time. You still care for each other, protect your friends, give a helping hand when asked…”
He tugged the laces of Vax’s undershirt open, unable to resist leaning down to press a gentle kiss to the newly exposed skin. His eyes dropped down to trace over the generous scattering of scars across the tanned skin, some clearly tended to with magical healing, some left to mend together in more uneven lines. He was quietly grateful to see that there seemed to be no major new additions, but there were still days-faded bruises here and there.
"… but, you're not invincible, my darling. Why not rest a while? Give your soul a chance to grow in the garden you've made. Take a season off, a full year even, sew your wild oats and watch them flourish. The world will still be there if you decide to adventure again."
Shaun tilted Vax'ildan's chin up and he felt a small rush of relief that the half elf met his eyes, even if it was with a little reluctance.
"Retirement from adventuring was the best decision I ever made. And I'm not the only one who feels that way. Other members of the council, Lady Allura, Lady Kima— so have found purpose and joy in life after the blade is sheathed. And you will too.” He brushed his thumb over Vax's cheek and looked at him fondly. "And I'd be lying if the thought of having you all to myself wasn't the greatest desire I've ever known."
His heart softened as he watched the gentle smile spread across the younger man’s face. “…A year… here, in Emon?”
Even so. The uncertainty remained as Vax dug his canine into his bottom lip and Gilmore could hear the objection before the half elf voiced it.
Vex.
“… I’ll think about it.” Vax’s hand slid down to take his and he brought it to his mouth to press a soft kiss to the gleaming ring on his finger.
"That's all I ask for," Gilmore murmured gently. He let the moment stretch until he could start to see the early signs of his partner’s restlessness before clearing his throat. “I’ve… heard your sister is enjoying Percival’s and Keyleth’s company… she might enjoy a little break with them at her side.”
Vax let out a low laugh, rolling his eyes as his shoulders dropped. “Ugh, that…. yes, that… she couldn’t be happy with one of my friends?”
It wasn’t a surprise to see the man deflect – as much as Vex knew of their relationship, it was unlikely she wanted details either, so Shaun smiled along for a moment. But he refocused with a gentle hand on the half elf’s shoulder and continued, “Vax. What I mean is, a year doesn't have to be spent just here and it doesn’t just have to be spent with me. I do have the store to open in Whitestone, and there’s a wider world beyond that," he said with a hopeful tilt of his eyebrow.
Vax’s lips twitched in kind even as he shook his head, but his eyes were contemplative. “Yeah…” There was quiet for a beat before he shook his head more emphatically and pressed on. “She seems happy.”
“She does…”
“But I don’t want to think about it that much right now.” Light hands brushed across Gilmore’s shoulders before trailing down, clever fingers making quick work of the shining clasps that held his robe in place. “To be honest, I don’t want to think of much of anything right now, Shaun,” Vax said with a sigh. “I… I just want to get clean, spend the night with you…”
“Alright, my dove…” There was no need to push so far right now. Shaun cupped the half elf’s jaw, thumbing the soft skin. “Let me help you forget.” With that, he leaned down, pressing his partner into a deep and thorough kiss until Vax sighed softly and melted into the touch.
Slowly, Gilmore pressed forward, coaxing Vax back and drawing a tiny, amused sound from him as his dexterous hands moved to steadily divest them both of the rest of their clothes on their journey.
He’d just stepped out of his dark billowing pants when Vax straightened subtly as his next step back brought him a stair down into the warm clear water. “Mmh…”
They moved back together slowly, using each other as support as they sank deeper into the pool and it warmed Shaun’s heart to feel Vax settle into him, to feel his arms hook loosely around the mage’s neck.
Gilmore ran his hands slowly up and down the half elf’s back, sides, shoulders, helping the water wash away day-old sweat and dirt from his skin. The quiet moments stretched for a time, and he worked the remaining traces of travel from his companion’s body until Vax pressed closer again, hands starting to stray down Shaun’s in kind.
Impatient.
“Tell me, my love,” he murmured as he pressed a kiss below Vax’s ear. “Do you know what you want tonight?”
“Hmm…” Vax tipped his head onto his lover’s shoulder, hair fanning out through the water in dark ribbons. “Can…”
Shaun felt the man’s breath pause against his skin and… waited. Gave him the space he needed to find the words he knew were coming even as he brushed gentle fingers through the long dark hair.
“Can we play a little…? Like last time?” Vax swallowed and turned his face into Gilmore’s shoulder.
Shaun let out a soft hum, continuing the gentle touches for a moment before beckoning an emerald green bottle from its place in a small alcove nearby. He poured the gently floral soap into his hand and shooed the bottle away again as he lathered it in Vax’s hair. “You’d be interested in playing again with me?”
The half elf closed his eyes and tilted his head obligingly even as he let his hand slide down the mage’s broad chest, fingers tracing over the dusting of dark curled hair. “I know you’d never do it Shaun, but…” Vax licked his lips, voice dropping to a murmur. “What if we… played that you kept me here?”
Gilmore’s brows raised slightly but he kept his fingers moving in gentle soothing circles to keep his half elf from interpreting any kind of judgement and withdrawing. "Hm… We really should talk in depth on what you are and aren’t willing to do, my love. It's not as simple as placing a collar around your neck," Shaun said, taking care to circle the tense muscles at the top of Vax’ildan’s spine.
Vax let out a long content sigh at the touch, closing his eyes against the occasional trickles of water as he eagerly surrendered to the clever hands. “Mmh… we can talk if you want, but… it’s you, Shaun.” He smiled softly, his eyes still shut. “You’re the one with grand plans here, and more experience with this… to be perfectly honest, I think I trust your opinion of what I can take more than I trust mine…”
He found himself smiling even as the heavy weight of the words settled over him, the trust Vax had…
He couldn’t resist leaning in to press a short kiss to the tip of a pointed ear as he responded. “I may have experience, but it is your body, my darling… I don’t want to cause undo harm.”
The faint taste of soap made his lips twist until Vax laughed and Shaun let the moment ease with a chuckle of his own as he guided the half elf back to rinse. He went easily, tilting his head back to help Gilmore wash the soap from his hair before straightening slowly back up with a happy sigh.
Shaun held his cheeks as the water streamed off him, glinting gently in the warm candle glow that surrounded them. “When we have time… we will talk.”
He waited for Vax to nod before giving him a small smile. “Good. For tonight, you will promise me if you need something to stop, you’ll tell me. Think of a word we don’t ordinally use, if you utter it, I will cease what I’m doing.”
“Yes, Shaun…”
“There may be a time when you find yourself saying ‘stop’ when it isn’t what you truly want, so it should be something unique, something you won’t say in the heat of the moment.”
The half elf let out a soft breath of laughter even as he pressed closer, turning his face to press a kiss to his partner’s palm. “I understand the principle… I liked yours. ‘Ruidus’.” He let his hands slide slowly down Shaun’s chest, dipping beneath the water to explore below. “I say that and we stop, I understand.”
“Ruidus it is. And we’ll discuss this more soon, as soon as you’ve had a chance to relax a little from your journey, that I promise you.” Gilmore smiled and twisted his wrist, drawing his fingers back with the familiar violet leather collar hanging between them. “Would you like to wear this again for me, my darling?”
Vax’s eyes moved to the delicate dripping chains and Shaun watched their color darken as the half elf licked his lips. Then he was turning in place, drawing his long hair over one shoulder and off the back of his neck. “You put it on, Gil. Please?”
Gilmore nodded, giving in for that unseen moment to let his expression – what he could only imagine was open wonder at what was being offered to him, again – come over him as he positioned the silk-lined collar and clicked the clasp shut. “There you are…”
Vax’s breath caught softly at the sound as he let his hand slide down and already Shaun could see a tiny tremor of what he knew was anticipation.
“My beautiful songbird… You’re finally where you belong. And you won’t be leaving anytime soon.”
Perhaps it was too much – he kept his voice honey sweet, but the words were still a threat. Still, he had to trust Vax would speak if he had reservations.
So he summoned the other little tool he hadn’t stopped thinking about, a lead of matching leather that he snapped in place on the small loop he’d added to the collar and wound the excess around his hand. “I let you galivant around the world, my sweet, to season you with experience and vitality. But it’s time to ruminate on those experiences and for me to give you new ones. And I have plenty of things I’ve been dying to do to you.”
The effect was near immediate. Gilmore quietly watched as Vax settled into the fantasy – a world where he could leave the hardest parts of adventuring behind but escape the guilt of the interpreted desertion of his friends.
He brushed gentle fingers over the skin just above the collar. “Tell me, my pet, will you be good for me? Show me how you can behave?"
The half elf licked his lips and let his hair slip from his fingers to settle. “I will… I’ll be good, just tell me, and I’ll do whatever you ask, Shaun.”
“That’s what I wanted to hear. It’s so much easier just to do as you’re told, isn’t it?” He tugged the leash and almost couldn’t stop himself chuckling as Vax nodded and followed obligingly.
There was nothing Vax hated more than doing what he was told.
Except for right now, apparently.
He led the half elf steadily to one of the central stone islands and guided him to face it, pressing his hands one at a time to grip the decorative edge.
A tiny needy sound jumped from Vax’s lips as Shaun stepped up behind him and leaned close to circle the leash around a thin towering palm before taking hold of the end again. Now as he tugged, the half elf was pulled forward, bending at the waist for Shaun to watch.
“You were gone for so very long; it’s going to take a lot of convincing before I give you permission to finish. Do you think you deserve my cock inside you?” he asked, letting his free hand wander down to Vax’s hip.
“I…” The younger man only just resisted squirming his hips even as Shaun felt him adjust his footing. “I don’t know… but I’d like to earn it, if you’d let me.”
“Ever eager to please,” Gilmore murmured, leaning forward to brush his lips over his partner’s neck. He took a few moments to enjoy the sensitive skin, nipping and kissing as Vax’s breath gradually came faster and faster until it outpaced the gentle sounds of the water lapping against their skin.
When Vax began to squirm, Shaun hooked his arm around his lover’s chest, fingers catching his chin and tilting it to the side to bare more skin. “There we are… almost ready to play.”
“M—mn—” The half elf tilted his head back easily, until it was near craned back over Gilmore’s shoulder, the splay of delicate dripping chains down his neck on full display. “Yes…”
“But you’re missing one very important step. When we’re alone like this, I want to see you positioned properly for me.” Oh so carefully, Shaun pulled on the lead, drawing Vax forward until he was forced to bend over the edge of the island, the curve of his spine a beautiful arch that he couldn’t resist drawing his fingers down. “Now this is a place that suits you, isn’t it? Sweet and submissive…”
He slid his free hand back up and brushed Vax’s hair aside to check the collar, to slip two fingers beneath to make sure he had more than enough slack and that the leftover moisture wasn’t causing any friction against his skin.
Vax, for his part, seemed practically boneless, panting softly and following Shaun’s pull easily until he was bent over the island and braced on his elbows.
“… Good… now spread your legs for me, darling. It should be easy for me to access your body. How else can I take care of my beautiful songbird if I can't reach your treasured places?"
“Y… yes, Shaun…” Vax shifted his legs further apart and Shaun didn’t know what he’d done to deserve this.
"So sweet, my dear… I can’t deny you much of anything. You pose so perfectly," Gilmore said and twisted the fingers of his free hand to conjure a spectral one that quickly brought an open jar over to hover just beside him. He swiped his fingers through the nearly pearlescent salve and rubbed it between the digits.
He’d had some time since things had calmed down from the most recent disaster – time to think, time to invent, time to… himself.
Well. Just because his own company wasn’t quite as pleasurable as Vax’s, it didn’t mean he’d been entirely neglecting his health.
The salve was a very basic enchantment, any mage could have made it if they put their mind to it, but the quality of the ingredients was what made the difference. It was excellent on minor cuts, kept skin from cracking in the cold or heat, and… it provided the loveliest sensation on the skin.
Quite water resistant as well.
“Stay still, my dear,” he murmured, unwinding the leash from his hand as the spectral hand quickly set aside the jar and returned to take hold of the purple leather. The arcane hold wasn’t able to carry much weight, but so long as the rogue followed his commands, it would keep him in place.
Vax let out a ragged gasp as Shaun’s slick fingers found his entrance, three fingertips rubbing the slick over his skin. “Ah—” His spine straightened subtly as the first fingertip pressed through the tight muscles before sinking inside in one long easy push as a longer moan echoed off the water’s surface. “Shaun, ah—oh fuck—”
“Ah, you like it,” Gilmore chuckled, letting his mask for their game slip away just a little even as he crooked his finger and worked it deeper to help stretch his lover’s muscles. “You know, I was hoping so. I have quite a few little inventions to try out, but I don’t want to tire you out so soon…”
Vax let out an unselfconscious moan and nodded, his hips squirming as Shaun pressed up closer behind him to tease his teeth over the half elf’s neck even as his now free hand slid down to rest low on his pelvis. “Do you want another…?”
“I…” A shiver ran through him as Shaun drew his nails lightly over the skin, inches away from the jut of his cock. “Yes.”
“Good boy. Thank you for being honest,” he almost purred, letting a second thick digit join the first and sinking them both in deep. “I think you deserve a treat, my sweet, sensitive treasure.” He swiped his fingers through the salve again before wrapping them around his lover’s cock.
Vax groaned happily at the easy praise, trying desperately to keep his hips still even as they rocked and twitched into the silky slick of Shaun’s hand.
“Oh… aching already. So full… let me ease your burden,” the sorcerer murmured, tightening his hand and working it faster as the clear water around them churned and Vax was whining softly with each breath.
Gilmore was starting to feel a little of his desperation and he made no effort to hide his arousal pressed against Vax’s inner thigh. But his partner’s ecstasy came first. The night was long, but not long enough, and that was all he knew they had for sure.
Vax was gasping now and shuddering as his hips bucked, trapped as they were between dual points of stimulation. “Gil— Shaun—”
He knew that tone. That tone meant Vax was nearing the edge – they’d been apart for a long time, Shaun doubted he’d be faring better if their positions were reversed, but…
Not yet.
“Easy—easy, love...” Gilmore said and kissed the spot he’d just bitten. He could feel Vax’s heartbeat hammering under his lips, taste the faint and clean skin and slowly slid his fingers free of his tight entrance. “Just… relax, and enjoy the sensations… feel the warm water lapping against you, feel the leather at your neck… Focus on your breathing.”
He let his other hand slide away from Vax’s cock, rubbing wide soothing circles on the half elf’s hip bone and felt a small proud smile curl his lips as his partner whined, but didn’t try to move from his place. “Good… I want you to wait a little longer. I promise to make it very worthwhile. Relax and breathe…”
Vax shuddered and panted, but the tightwire of his body relaxed slowly, head tilting forward as Shaun watched the words wash over him.
“That’s it… there’s my sweet bird. Feel your mind grow heavy like a stone. I will catch you. Let me take care of you…”
“Yours…” Vax hummed softly, and Shaun only barely resisted wrapping his arms around the half elf and decreeing to never let go.
“… Always,” the sorcerer said, shifting his grip on Vax’s hip to hold him in place and moving his other hand down to guide his own leaking erection until it rubbed over his lover’s slicked rim.
Vax’s mouth dropped open at the hot firm pressure so the moan that followed as Shaun pushed slowly in was long and uninhibited, loud enough that it echoed off the exquisite tile that surrounded them.
Even filled with slick, his muscles pulsed tight as Shaun pressed deeper and each gradual inch had the half elf’s legs shaking harder and harder until he started putting more weight on his hands to keep his place.
And— no, he didn’t want Vax bending forward for him anymore, he needed the connection of them close. With a thought, Shaun commanded the spectral hand to bring the lead closer and wrap it loosely around his own wrist as he urged Vax up until he was leaning back against Shaun’s broad chest.
It took a few moments until they could settle together, and Shaun could press into him to the hilt, but Vax was practically lounging back into his chest, each breath coming with a soft needy sound. “Shaun… Shaun, I… you feel—"
“You're my greatest weakness, you know that? I'm incapable of denying you anything… you're going to be spoiled rotten in my little harem of one," he said with a gentle tease, pulling back just enough to feel Vax pulse around him before pushing back in. With a gentle kiss to the back of his neck, he pushed forward again, angling his hips just as he knew his lover liked.
Vax’s eyes fluttered shut at the relentless drag inside him, ever-deft hands scrambling briefly for purchase to ground himself until he found Shaun’s hips. “Oh— Gods, you feel good—”
Gilmore rumbled happily, overjoyed at the easy surrender of Vax putting his weight back into him. “You truly are my treasure… do you know why?”
“… Wh…?” He watched Vax lick his lips and try to focus briefly, and perhaps it was cruel to choose that moment to thrust deeper and grind against the half elf’s prostate, dragging a choked moan from low in his chest.
“Because you make me feel like a king,” Shaun growled and repeated the motion, settling into a slow intense pace. “And what’s a king without his greatest jewel?”
Vax’s body bucked, going up on his toes briefly as if he somehow wanted to escape the delicious stimulation even as Gilmore knew nothing was further from the truth from the expression and beautiful flush coloring his face like a glowing ember as the brazen claims fell over him.
Shaun’s hand moved back down to Vax’s cock but this time passed over it to palm his lover’s sac. “Perhaps I should adorn these in silver and gold too… after all, they are mine.”
Vax’s high needy keen nearly distracted him from his focus as he summoned his spectral hand again with a thought, bringing it under the water to wrap a cord of fine gold chain, enchanted to keep him from reaching his peak.
He felt more than saw the moment that Vax came back to himself enough to realize what had happened and his partner squirmed briefly even as Shaun’s hand wrapped around him again. “No— nono, don’t make me wait…”
He stilled his hand on Vax’s cock, bowing his head to brush a kiss over the tan skin. “Do you mean to use your word, darling?”
A short whine caught in Vax’s throat and he watched him take a long slow breath in and out before giving a short shake of his head.
He would take the pleasure Shaun gave him.
Shaun was bewitched.
“Good boy…” Gilmore murmured, continuing to kiss his thanks up and down his neck. He resumed his pace, each thrust making Vax rock forward into his hand as he felt himself sink into the tight, wet heat. “I know… you’ll get your pleasure soon, but. A king comes first.”
The half elf was moaning in a steady stream, his head falling back on Shaun’s shoulder even as the sorcerer pressed them forward again until Vax’s stomach was pressed to the tile of the stone island. “Gods, I missed your voice… I thought of you so many nights, how I could keep you calling out like this, occupied by my little toys and tricks while I worked the shop. And after a long… long day of play, I’d ravish you until you were spent. Would you like that, my darling? Be my pretty little pleasure bird?”
Vax’s unsteady arms moved down to brace on the stone as a desperate sound somewhere between a moan and a sob tore from his throat. “Sha—yes, yes—”
Would you like to stay here? Stay in Emon, flit about the city, visit Vex in Whitestone and Pike in Westruun, and…
Come home to this?
It wasn’t fair to ask – not just because of the collar, this was hardly the moment.
Shaun shook his head and swallowed the words down – it was hardly difficult to turn his mind back to the perfect slide of his skin against Vax’s, the way he was starting to twitch and writhe as he teased against the edge of his climax.
“Let yourself go for me,” Gilmore commanded, keeping his voice level with difficulty even as he pressed his free hand to the space between Vax’s shoulder blades and guided him to lean forward again. “Show me—your wings, my beautiful songbird, I want to see you in all your glory.”
Vax’s breath caught in his throat, his spine straightening up with a tension that Shaun hadn’t seen since the half elf had walked through his door. “I—I can’t—”
Shaun blinked, mind stumbling briefly over his meaning. He was close himself, so close, his attention was on Vax, but he was only human and he was only barely holding himself back from chasing his own pleasure. “You…?”
Ah. They’d been traveling today. Vax had already called on those powers.
He let out a low unsteady laugh, circling his thumb over the head of Vax’s leaking shaft. “I see… Perhaps—tomorrow, I’ll let you spill…”
“No— Shaun, please— please—!” Vax threw his head back on the mage’s shoulder, whined and squirmed in his place pinned between the unending stimulation. Every effort to pull away from the hand wrapped around him drove him right down onto Shaun’s cock and it was driving both of them mad.
“At least— you still are able to service your king— Oh— Vax’ildan—” His hips were working in unrelenting grinds through the tight muscles surrounding him, vision going rosy for a moment as he felt the pulses of pleasure grow into undeniable waves as he spilled inside his partner. “Oh love, yes… every last drop of me, my— beautiful treasure…” He couldn’t resist squeezing the base of Vax’s rigid cock, still rocking through the spasms of his muscles as his lover shivered and whined.
“… Ple… please, don’t make me wait, Shaun, please, I’ll do as you want, I’ll— be good—please let me cum…” The words fell in a steady stream from Vax’s lips like a waterfall as he panted and shook. He was so hard it must be starting to skirt against discomfort, and it seemed like it was long past the point where his legs would support him if Gilmore were to vanish.
“Shh…” Shaun ran light fingers up and down his back, urging Vax to lean back against him again and hooking an arm around his waist. He was still buried deep, last shoots of pleasure gradually fading as he turned his focus back to his companion. “Do you remember what I said to you? I promised you I’d make this worthwhile… I promised you…”
Vax pressed his lips together tightly and nodded slowly. He took a long unsteady breath through his nose, and another, shoulders very gradually relaxing even as his legs kept shaking.
Shaun brought his hand up to press over Vax’s chest, feeling his heart hammering in his ribcage as he craned his neck to catch the half elf in a deep kiss.
Vax let out another slow breath and closed his eyes, parting his lips immediately and returning the kiss a little clumsily as he came back down slowly from his near euphoria. “Mh…”
When his breathing had settled almost back to normal, Shaun broke the kiss, pressing their foreheads together with a low content hum. “Just a little while longer…”
He twisted his fingers and his spectral hand pressed a familiar platinum plug into his grip just as he gradually eased his hips back to slide out of Vax’s body. The next instant they broke contact, Shaun pressed the tip of the toy to his stretched rim, coaxing it slowly into place even as Vax twitched against him, eyes fluttering open, dark and dazed with his pupils blown. His face was flushed a garnet red and Shaun could see how much he was trying so hard to be good for his lover even as his hips squirmed. “Let it in, darling, relax…”
Vax arched and groaned and grabbed at the island before them, but his body took it beautifully and Shaun moved his fingers down briefly to rub small circles on the half elf’s inner thigh. “There we go… I know it presses in all the right places, and you can play with it all you like. Doesn’t that sound lovely?”
“Mmh…” The half elf nodded, leaning his head back into Shaun even as he swayed slightly on his feet.
“Don’t worry, my love. Tomorrow is only a few hours away, then I can see your beautiful wings and you can cum for me,” Shaun hummed, keeping his voice as casual as he could manage as he stepped back slowly, keeping one hand on Vax’s shoulder to steady him even as he adjusted his grip on the leash to pull his partner back towards the stairs and up to dry land.
Vax followed the lead easily – he could take so much, Shaun adored him and despite his words, he didn’t think he could bare to make his partner wait until morning – and he stepped out of the pool on shaky legs.
Shaun led them slowly, giving him time to find his footing as they moved to the ornately carved wooden door to his bedroom. He opened it with a wave of his hand to reveal a white stone room beyond, each wall hung with elaborate tapestries and a wide fire pit with a delicate ornate bronze cage shielding them from any stray coals. Matching cages were mounted over each hanging sconce around the room, bathing the space in golden candle glow.
The half elf barely registered the sumptuous surroundings, eyes still following his lover as they made their way inside, but there would be time for him to appreciate them later.
And of course, there was the bed. It was easily large enough for four, made up in rich amethyst coverings that Shaun knew felt just heavenly on bare, overheated skin.
But… not yet.
“I’ll bring you there eventually, my darling, but first…” He took Vax’s hand and guided him closer to the fire. It was surrounded on most sides by well-padded benches and structured sitting cushions, and one… slightly unusual seat.
It was a perfect matching set with the benches although it was aligned to point straight towards the fire instead of alongside. The cushion on top was also thicker, its edges sloped in a semicircle, and it was this that Shaun led him to. “Kneel for me, my dear. With your legs on either side of the bench.”
Vax blinked briefly in confusion, but he stepped forward easily, using Shaun’s hand for balance as he sunk down slowly until he was straddling the bench and—
Shaun’s lips twitched as he watched his partner’s breath catch. “Yes, there we are… it should press that toy of mine in just the right spot.” He rested his hands gently on Vax’s shoulders and guided him to rock back, drawing a stuttered groan from his lips. “Mm… you may rock back and forth as you need, darling. I’m going to work some of those tense knots out of your back. I don’t want your muscles strained for later tonight,” Shaun finished with a short smile.
Vax swallowed and nodded slowly, his breath already starting to quietly speed as his hips seemed to move unbidden back and forth to feel the plug shift inside him. “H—ah…”
“Good…” He leaned down to brush a brief kiss over the half elf’s forehead and unclipped the leash from his collar before stepping back. He strayed just far enough to carefully lay the leash on a side table and grab a comfortable lilac robe to slip on before returning to step up behind his lover.
Vax’s head twitched back towards him briefly and Shaun clicked his tongue. “No peeking, my love. I may have more surprises for you tonight…” He tugged a fine emerald green sash from the pocket of his robe and looped it gently around Vax’s head, carefully securing it to cover his eyes.
He brushed his hands gently through the half elf’s dripping hair, searching for any signs of uncertainty or reluctance at having his sight taken, but Vax just let out a content sigh.
Shaun gave a short approving nod and summoned a bottle of massage oil to him with a thought, opening the top to pour a measure of it over his hands and taking a long breath of its fragrant scent as it warmed on his skin.
The first gentle sweep over Vax’s back drew out a quiet moan, but as he increased the pressure to a beginner’s massage, the half elf flinched. “Vax’ildan. I have half a mind to keep you here just to let you stretch and relax, your muscles are absolute granite.”
Gilmore sighed as he lightened his touch a little and it still drew a soft hiss of discomfort before the sound was chased off by a louder moan as Vax tightened unintentionally around the plug. “You need to take better care of yourself… my goodness.”
“I… I’m… sorry,” Vax said distractedly, trying to keep his shoulders from creeping up higher.
“I know you are, my sweet. Even without the collar, I know,” Shaun said, leaning forward to press another soft kiss to the point of Vax’s ear. “And I’m not disappointed you can’t show me your wings tonight… they carried you safely here, into my arms. I will never punish you for what you cannot control,” he whispered softly.
Something in his heart softened as he watched his lover simply melt into the kind words and gentle touch as he rolled his hips slowly to tease his own pleasure. “Yes, Shaun…”
Gilmore worked him over slowly and Vax let him. He rubbed the muscles at the base of his neck, did as much as he could for his tight shoulders and made his way down each arm and the length of his spine.
Each harder press drew a tiny wince followed immediately by a little gasp of sensation as Vax tightened around the toy inside him. It seemed to be an almost overly efficient feedback loop, the more uncomfortable the knot Gilmore worked at, the more pleasure he received, hips now working in a steady pace against the cushion.
The oil was flecked here and there with tiny flakes of gold that shone on Vax’s tanned body and the sorcerer was sure he could happily sit here forever. He watched as it absorbed steadily into the skin, letting his skillful hands explore the new scars, the firm muscle and tender ticklish spots. It was almost meditative, and he found himself tracing runes through the oil, marking Vax as if he were writing on pages of a book .He worked dutifully – caressing, massaging, stretching sore muscles back to a relaxed state. His heart ached to see how roughly his lover had carried himself, and he pressed gentle kisses to each and every knot, bruise and scar.
The half elf seemed just as content. Vax was almost drifting under the tending touch, leaning into each urging press as he relaxed back into the strong hands and unrelenting stimulation of his idle hips.
Gilmore realized suddenly that he didn’t know how long they’d been here, or what Vax had come from before this, and drifting could quickly become unmoored. He pulled his hands back and shifted up closer behind Vax, holding a hand out to catch the jug his spectral hands brought to him. “Tip your head up just a bit, my love… this is watermelon and mint, take it down for me.”
Vax hummed and parted his lips, drinking as carefully as he could as Shaun tilted the bottle steadily back.
“Good boy… I can’t let people say I don’t treat my harem well,” he teased, lowering the bottle and swiping away a stray drop of juice with his thumb.
“Feels so good just to be here… to be yours, to do with what you like…” Vax’s words were soft at the edges, not quite slurred, but he was undoubtedly in a bit of a daze and Shaun…
Shaun smiled softly and brushed his fingers through Vax’s hair. That was what he could give him, if only for a little while, no worry for duty or responsibility, just…
His.
“… oh, my enthrala. You’ve had such a hard time out there, haven’t you? I feel for your pain,” he murmured, circling around his lover and sinking down to sit in front of hip, drawing his hands slowly up and down his spread thighs.
The half elf’s breath caught softly at the touch as his straining cock twitched and Shaun couldn’t wait anymore. He couldn’t bear to make Vax wait anymore. He released the chain around his cock and wrapped his fingers around the base, massaging gently. “I simply can’t resist you, my love, and you deserve to be spoiled after all you’ve endured for me. I want you to cum, whenever you’re ready,” he said, drawing one teasing lick over the velvet skin of Vax’s cock before taking it into his mouth.
The taste of his arousal filled Gilmore’s mouth and he gave a low content hum as the half elf’s hands immediately jolted up helplessly to brace on his shoulders. “Ah—Auh…!”
He moved his hands to Vax’s hips, guiding him to rock back and forth harder to alternately grind his partner back onto the plug and then drag him forward to thrust into his mouth and Vax nearly sobbed.
Shaun hummed around his lover’s shaft, keeping his lips tight to send a buzz of vibrations through him, feeling it pulse against his tongue. This was why he vastly preferred to give rather than receive; it was so much more gratifying to watch his lover come undone with a single flick of his tongue. And the noises he could drag out him...
Shaun could feel himself coming back to arousal just at the sound of his lover’s voice.
The sorcerer kept his hands on Vax’s hips, guiding and massaging in equal time as he stole a glance up to watch his rogue blush under the green sash, just in time to take him down to the base and swallow around him.
He wasn’t disappointed by the first honest to gods shout he dragged from the half elf’s lips, head thrown back as his body bucked and shuddered. “Ah—Ah!!”
Every squirm worked the plug relentlessly against his prostate and in the space of a few breaths, he was whining and keening, his fingers scrambling over his lover’s shoulders. “Shaun—Shaun, gods thank—you feel so good, I—” His mouth fell open, inescapable heat blooming through him as he finally found his peak with a ragged cry.
Shaun worked him through it, let him rock into his mouth and twist back onto the plug to ride out every wave of pleasure he liked and Vax gasped and shivered through each aftershock. He knew for a fact that everything would be made more intense by the velvet darkness that left him with nothing to focus on but every curl of Shaun’s tongue, every brush of his hands until finally he had to pull back to breathe.
“There—there, just breathe, darling… you did so well for me. Came just as I asked you to.” Shaun shifted up onto his knees and brushed his hands up the Vax’s sides and arms until he could wrap his arms around him and urge him closer, guiding his head down to rest on his shoulder. “Come here…”
Vax let out a long, relieved moan and draped happily over his lover, wrapping his arms around his neck. “Mmh…”
“You sang so beautifully, my love, I’m… so very pleased with you,” he murmured, running his hands up and down Vax’s back as he worked through the last shivers of his orgasm.
His partner pressed his face into Shaun’s neck, humming low in his throat as he nestled closer and scattered affectionate kisses over his collar, and the magician couldn’t stop the low breath of laughter. “Yes, you’re very much welcome, my dear… that’s alright. Don’t worry about speaking yet, you can just feel if that’s what you’d like…”
Gilmore twirled the ends of Vax’s hair around his fingers, no longer dripping wet but damp, and relished the moment of pure connection between them. “Always so good for me, so very perfect… you make me feel complete, Vax’ildan…”
Vax tilted his head into the touch and Shaun let him drift for a moment, listened to his breathing and his frantic pulse steadily calm as they just stayed close.
After a few long moments, Shaun leaned back slowly, taking one of Vax’s hands and raising it up so he could trail a line of kisses from shoulder, to elbow, to wrist with Vax’s easy cooperation. “Stay seated, be a good boy… I have one last relaxing treat for you,” the sorcerer said and shifted up slowly, calling his next trick to him with a quirk of his fingers.
“Smell, isn’t it wonderful?” He moved the wide white candle just close enough for Vax to take in the delicate floral scent. “Jasmine. Night blooming. This will warm you deep in your bones, my love, and lull you to sleep,” he said and turned it in his hands, watching the wax pool.
Vax licked his lips and gave a short nod. “Yes…”
Gilmore leaned down to kiss the crown of his head and murmured, “Remember, all you have to do is relax and feel. And if you wish, I’ll allow you to take your cock in hand, but I want to hear you sing again if you finish,” he let his voice turn down into something salacious as he straightened up and raised the candle a good distance up to manage the temperature of the wax before letting it spill over onto Vax’s thigh in a frankly obscene spatter of white. “Mm… goodness but you do look beautiful, don’t you?”
Vax’s breath had caught in his throat, lips parted as he held himself very still and Shaun let the next drops spill up closer to his hip and his half elf was starting to pant, legs starting to shake almost imperceptibly again. His lips were moving oh so slightly like he was searching for words, but admittedly it was a new sensation for most.
“Spread your legs a little further for me, darling, we’re going to warm you up…”
The inner thighs were more sensitive, so he lifted the candle up even higher to cool the wax as he waited for more to pool before tipping it again to let the wax paint the delicious skin before him.
Vax’s entire body started, mouth dropping further even as his hands twitched out to grab at the cushion he was settled on. “U—órava—au—”
It took Shaun just a moment to process the tightness to his lover’s voice just before he recognized elvish syllables tucked between.
Focused as he was the delicate tilt of the candle, it took him just an instance more to remember the word for ‘mercy’.
Shaun’s hands froze.
“Ruidus—”
In a heartbeat, Gilmore dropped the candle, panic and uncertainty overtaking him for a split second before he forced himself to move, stepping closer and brushing a very light touch over Vax’s shoulder to let him know where he was. “Ruidus— I heard you, ruidus— Vax, darling, I… I’m taking off the blindfold and the collar.”
His hands were shaking just a little as he did, and his heart seized in his chest to realize how Vax’s complexion had paled a shade, his eyes still shut behind the discarded silk. “It’s alright, it’s okay… I want you to just hold for me for one second, I’m going to take the toy out.”
Shaun dropped back to a knee to reach around Vax’s body, fingers quickly finding the base of the plug and easing it out of him before dropping it to the side. “There, there we are, no more tricks— can you open your eyes, love?”
Vax did, with an unsteady exhale, his gaze immediately moving down to the splash of cooled candle wax on his thigh. He stared for a long second before looking further down to the innocuous white candle now resting on the ground beside them. “I…”
He looked up to Shaun, cloudy confusion settling heavily over his face. “I’m sorry, I… I didn’t trust you… I’m sorry.” His voice was thin and stunned and undeniably disappointed in himself.
“Can I hold you?” Gilmore said gently, the entirety of his attention now locked on his lover’s muted expression.
Vax blinked, eyes sliding down as he gave a short nod.
“If I hold you tight, will it make it worse…?” he continued, trying to ignore how his own heart was still hammering in his ears.
The half elf’s brow creased slightly before he shook his head.
Gilmore took a slow breath of his own and fought to keep his calm, to not think about the potential consequences after this moment, just what Vax needed now – a grounding presence to bring him back. “… Look at me, darling?”
He waited until Vax raised his eyes, hating how uncertain they were. “I’m not upset at you, there is nothing to apologize for, I promise you. Do you want me to hold you?” The mage opened his arms and waited.
Vax stared at him for a second, words seemingly taking a beat to reach him before he almost let himself fall into the embrace and some part of the tight knot of anxiety in Gilmore’s stomach relaxed ever so slightly.
The half elf was clutching his back, grip tight but brittle as he pressed his face into his lover’s neck and Shaun took a long moment to simply keep him close, to breathe at an even rate to encourage Vax to do the same.
He was running one hand gently up and down Vax’s back when his fingers brushed over uneven skin and –
Oh.
Shaun was a fool.
He knew it was there. He had known in the abstract, but Vax was covered in so many scars.
He forced himself not to wince as he drew the line of Vax’s hair aside to reveal the edge of a ragged, uneven burn scar. “… you don’t have to answer right now, sweetheart, if you don’t want to… where did this come from?”
“… um…” Vax blinked hard and Shaun felt him let out a long exhale against his neck, but his body was no longer wire tight. “… it’s… where the Clasp branded me.”
He shifted one hand back slowly, tugging his hair aside for Shaun to see the full long-healed hand print shaped burn. “I had Keyleth… burn it off.”
Gilmore nodded slowly, feeling the guilt sink like a stone in his stomach. “… that was very brave of you,” he murmured, continuing his idle strokes through Vax’s hair. “It shows they don’t have power over you anymore.”
Vax let his hand move back to Gilmore’s shoulder, pressing eagerly into the contact even as a tiny incredulous sound caught low in his throat. If Shaun were to guess, ‘brave’ wasn’t a word Vax would ascribe to himself in this moment and it was his duty to do everything in his power to brush that untruth away. At least his breathing had finally – truly – calmed, body relaxed where it was resting against Shaun’s.
“… I’m sorry. I didn’t think you’d hurt me, I promise I didn’t.” Vax swallowed and tipped his head down just enough to see his thigh again, letting out an almost affronted exhale. “Candle wax, how did I…? What did my brain do…?”
“You’ve navigated a path full of danger,” Shaun said kindly, turning to brush a short kiss over his forehead. “And your instincts have kept you alive. Your brain was only trying to save yourself from pain your body said would be inevitable.”
Vax’s brow creased even as he turned easily into the soft touches, a flicker of embarrassment crossing his face. “But…”
Shaun hooked a finger under Vax’s chin and tilted his head back up, thumbing his jawline. “I am so very sorry I caused this memory to invade your quiet time here. This place is to be your sanctuary as much as it is mine. When you’re ready, we can talk more about this. And if you still wish to be my partner in play, I can show you how we could navigate around such harmful memories, but I want you to know I’m not upset we had to stop.”
Vax leaned into the touch, but he couldn’t seem to keep his eyes up on Shaun. “You don’t… you don’t need to apologize, it was— what could I think you were going to do, burn me? What—possible sense does that make?”
“Vax. You will never disappoint me or anger me for using Ruidus, for whatever reason.” He leaned forehead, pressing their foreheads together and offering him a small smile. “And I will still love you after the storm has passed… now, may I move you to the bed for you to rest? Or would you like to stay here for me to hold you?”
Vax let out a quiet sigh and Shaun felt more of his own panic fade away as he brushed light fingers up and down the sorcerer’s back and nodded. “… can we move to the bed?”
“Of course, my dove, come here…” He straightened slowly, helping Vax to his feet before summoning a spectral hand to pass him a matching comfortable robe – this time in black – over for him to wrap around Vax’s back. Another layer of security, just if he felt he needed it.
With a few slow steps and a few more arcane hands turning down the sheets for them, the two settled in bed, Gilmore on his back and holding Vax close to his side.
Minutes slipped by. Shaun rubbed Vax’s back and pressed kisses over his forehead and let them both settle before breaking the silence. “… can you think of anything in the world that you’d like? Food, drink, anything else of comfort?”
“No, I’m…” Vax sighed softly, and Shaun watched his brow crease briefly. “I’m fine, Shaun, I promise, it— it wasn’t even anything, I just got… mixed around. Startled…” He raised his head enough to press a kiss of his own to his lover’s collarbone. “It wasn’t your fault.”
“And it wasn’t yours either, my darling. At a moment like that… sometimes it’s hard to tell what kind of stimulation will affect you in what way.” He slid a hand down to take one of Vax’s, twining their fingers gently. “I don’t know if it will help at all, but I want you to know that everyone has these little spikes in their memory. It can be as small and simple as a colour, it’s…”
Shaun let out a soft sigh and squeezed his fingers briefly. “For me, I can’t stand to have my hands bound. Reminds me of a bad experience with too much summer wine when I was young. No one’s fault, but even the scent of that vintage makes me queasy. If you’d have opened a bottle and poured it for me, I might have had the same reaction you did just now.”
Vax kept his face turned into his lover’s neck, and Shaun could feel his lips pursed into a tight line as he listened quietly before giving a short nod and squeezing his fingers back.
“When you stay a while next time, if you like… we can speak about these things. What can bring us to ruin or what secrets we’ve always wished a partner to provide for us but didn’t feel ready to ask.”
“… it… doesn’t necessarily sound fun to spend an evening talking about all the worse things that have happened to us, Gil…”
“We don’t have to go into detail, darling. Even such simple outlines, like what I just told you about myself will be helpful. What’s most important is what comes after,” Gilmore said, twirling a long of Vax’s hair around his fingers. "You still gravitate towards touch and comfort when... Startled. But some people find that distressing and would prefer to come back on their own.”
He felt Vax’s expression twist briefly and made a mental note to never ever leave his half elf without touch should this come up again.
“Hmm, I can see that’s not your preference… When we talk of these things, you can let me know what will help you before such things happen. If you would like food or drink, warmth or cold. If you need a few minutes to continue, or you'd like me to stop all together like I did today. When… you have time to stay longer, if you like”— Gilmore shifted a little onto his side to better see Vax’s face— “we can get settled into an arrangement with more communication. I… never should have done what we did tonight without it, and that’s my fault. It involves more trust, Vax’ildan, but it’s an intimacy as well, knowing your partner so deeply… I’d like very much to explore that with you,” he finished, running his thumb over Vax’s lips as he cupped his jaw.
Vax was watching him back with steady eyes, his own thumb brushing idly back and forth over Shaun’s chest. “… this is what you were talking about, last time,” he murmured. “A contract of sorts…”
“Yes,” the sorcerer said, still holding Vax’s cheek. “But I also need you to know that we don’t have to. It will never be something I require to keep loving you. That part you make very easy,” he said with a low chuckle.
He felt his heart warm as Vax smiled a little in return even as his eyes slid shut. “I don’t…” He sighed softly, shifting his legs to twine them loosely with his lover’s. “Tomorrow, maybe…”
“At your choice, Vax’idlan. I know you have roads to travel and people to save. Just… if you’ll let me, I want to take care of you. I want you to be safe out there and here with me. It’s all I ever need,” Shaun said and kissed the tip of his pointed ear.
Vax’s brow creased gently again, a soft sigh slipping from him. “… you simply have to run out of patience with me eventually…”
“Never, my love. Your spirit would remain free. I’ll have you however you want me to have you, that’s what a true partnership means,” Shaun answered simply.
The half elf swallowed softly, staying still for a beat before slowly shifting up, extricating just enough to move up on one elbow to look down at his lover. His eyes moved over the full lips that had explored every inch of him. The warm eyes that had cried over him. The laugh lines and stress lines, ones he had put there and ones that Shaun had found entirely on his own.
“Thank the god who let me meet you, Shaun,” Vax murmured softly.
"Every waking moment," he murmured in return.
Tomorrow, maybe his lover would be dragged away from him again. Maybe he’d be pulled a continent away or to another plane of existence, maybe it would never work.
But right now, Vax was leaning down to kiss him, slow and soft and here and his.