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“Hunter!”
The sound of Hunter’s dorm room door slamming open startled him out of his desk chair. His heart leapt to his throat as the seat tilted, nearly tipping backward, but he caught himself with his knee on the underside of his desk. He snapped his head around to glare at the person who had just disturbed his peace and quiet and was met with none other than the disheveled figure of Luz Noceda, his best friend who stayed about two dorms down from him.
“Sorry, sorry!” She turned and closed the door behind her in a more civilized manner than the way she’d practically forced it open just a moment ago.
Hunter reached up to remove the headphones from his head, shaking his head and running his hand through his hair in an attempt to fix his scruffy appearance. “What the hell are you barging in here on a Saturday morning for?”
Luz looked fairly antsy, which was far different from her usual happy-go-lucky demeanor. Her orange flannel was bunched up at the sleeves- as if she’d grown too hot in the outfit but had no time to remove the extra layer of clothing over her t-shirt- and her hair looked like she’d half-assed brushing it; at least Hunter wasn’t the only one. “I- um-”
Hunter cocked an eyebrow at her, waving her on as he leaned back in his chair lazily. “Luz, I have a very busy morning of watching YouTube and finishing my assignments a week early for my classes and would appreciate it if you would make this quick.”
“I need you to teach me how to date someone!” she blurted out, and looked like she regretted her statement instantly.
Hunter’s eyes widened slightly at her. “Okay… What the hell does that mean?” he asked in bemusement.
“Just hear me out!” Luz paced across the room, plopping herself down on the edge of his neatly made bed. “There’s this person in my creative writing class that I’ve kind of been talking to lately, and they asked me out on a date yesterday, and the date is tomorrow, and I have no idea what to do!”
“And… you’re asking me for advice? The guy who has a track record of zero when it comes to dating?” He looked at her, dumbfounded. “That’s gotta be the biggest cosmic joke you could come up with.”
“You dated that girl Shelby in high school,” Luz pointed out.
“That hardly counted. We did nothing but sit next to each other on the bus and eat lunch together sometimes, and that lasted for only a week.” Hunter gave her an unamused glance, crossing his arms as he propped his elbow up on the arm of his chair, head lolling to the side.
“What about Amity’s brother Ed?” It felt like Luz was grasping for straws at this point, and if it weren’t such a strange situation Hunter might have felt sympathetic for her. “You seemed to like him last year when we first moved into the dorms.”
“It never went anywhere, and besides, it wouldn’t have worked if it did anyway,” he said with a shrug. “I don’t think either of us had the courage to ask the other out on a second date. We didn’t have a lot in common.”
“Well…” Luz looked at her hands as she fiddled with a hair tie on her wrist- which Hunter knew was just a stim, since her hair wasn’t quite long enough to be pulled back by any means, unless she wanted to sport a miniature man bun. “I don’t know, you just seem like the kind of guy to be able to get someone if you wanted to. You give off a confident vibe.”
“Really?” Hunter looked at her in slight disbelief.
“I wouldn’t have come to you if I didn’t really need your help!” Luz launched herself off the bed, crashing onto the floor on her knees and putting her hands together in a plea, eyes wide and glimmering. “Please please please help me, Hunter! I just need some advice, that’s all!”
“Alright, alright!” He nudged her away with his foot as if he was shooing off a bothersome cat, though it was mainly to hide his pink cheeks. She looked unfairly cute like that, a thought he wanted out of his head immediately. “I’ll try to think of some stuff to tell you.”
Luz bounced up from her spot on the floor, unbothered by Hunter’s shove. She looked ecstatic. “Thank you, Hunter!” She leaned down to squeeze him in a bear hug, taking the wind right out of him. She smelled like laundry detergent and lint, which made him believe that she had just come up from the laundry room.
“Yeah yeah, don’t mention it. Seriously.” He returned the hug awkwardly, patting her back.
She pulled away, bouncing backward to sit on his bed again, legs crisscross as she looked at him expectantly. “So how do I go about this?”
“Okay, well… Where are you two going on your date?” Hunter figured that would be a good place to start, to figure out the vibes.
“That new bookstore downtown,” Luz replied excitedly. “They like some authors that I’ve never heard of before and wanted to introduce me to a few of their works!”
“That sounds fun,” Hunter offered, and he wasn’t necessarily lying. He figured that a first date should be something that had both parties’ interests in mind. Hunter loved spending time in the school library, and more often than not he would find Luz there as well, so he knew it was something she would find fun in. “Are you meeting there or are one of you picking the other up?”
“I was going to pick them up at their apartment off-campus and drive us there,” Luz informed him. “Oh God Hunter, what am I supposed to wear? Do you think it’ll be casual or like, dressy?”
“You’re going to a bookstore,” Hinter reminded her. “It’s probably casual… But since when do you care about what people see you wearing? I’ve known you since you were twelve, and never once have I ever seen you fret about dressing up for anyone .”
“I want to make an impression!” Luz whined, dragging her hands down her face in frustration. “What if they show up looking like a hot shot with a thousand Instagram followers and I-”
“If you show up in an outfit like the one you’re wearing now, you’d look like the girl with a 90-k following on her art blog on Tumblr,” Hunter cut her off, leaning forward in his seat. “And in my opinion, that’s way more impressive than any number of followers a person could get by posting a copious amount of photos of their face over and over for the world to see.”
Luz blinked at him a couple of times, taken aback. “Oh- you…” She felt her cheeks get slightly warm. “You think my art is impressive?”
“Why wouldn’t I? You’re seriously good at it.” Hunter glanced away slightly to avoid getting lost in her wondrous gaze.
Luz was silent for another moment before she giggled, hiding her face. “Okay, okay.” She got ahold of herself, taking in a quick breath. “So I go casual. What do we talk about?”
“Books, I’m assuming.” Hunter reached over to grab his cup of lukewarm coffee from an hour ago that he’d purchased at the school’s bookstore.
“Well- We’ll have to talk about something else,” Luz pressed. “It can’t just be books.”
“You seem to figure out how to talk to me about books for hours on end. This should be no different,” Hunter shrugged, leaning back in his seat again as he took a long sip from his coffee.
“Yeah, but you’re used to it! I don’t think you even listen half the time. You just let me talk.”
Hunter looked at her curiously over the top of his paper cup, answering when he lowered it. “You think I don’t listen to the things you tell me?”
“Well, you’re always doing something else when I do start talking, so I just assumed…” She stopped, tilting her head at him.
“What kind of friend would I be if I ignored you? If they really like you, they’ll listen to what you have to say.” Hunter put down his mug.
“Okay, let’s say it goes great. We plan a second date. What on earth do we do then?” Luz fretted. “Where would we go? Hunter, if you were taking me on a date where would you take me?”
Hunter stopped, staring at his desk for longer than necessary. “Why ask me?”
“I just need some inspiration!”
“Um… I guess I’d take you to the bookstore anyways because it’s something we both like- but you guys would’ve already gone there,” he added as an afterthought. “We would probably go to that cafe in the middle of town you showed me a while back that I know you like. You got that overly sweet dragon fruit drink and a bagel… Food is always a good date.” He propped his feet up on the desk as he thought. “Maybe if they like Azura you guys could watch an Azura movie. They aren’t as bad as they could be, really.”
“It sounds like you’ve had time to stir over this,” Luz pointed out teasingly.
“Oh don’t flatter yourself,” Hunter said, pointing at her. “I just know you.” It was only half true. He had absolutely found himself brewing over places to bring Luz- platonically, obviously- but had quickly shut it down.
Luz just laughed, laying back and draping an arm over her stomach. “Alright then big guy.” The room was in a comfortable silence for the next minute or so, and Hunter found himself staring at Luz as she was laid across his bed, her breathing even and her hair tousled in the morning light that shone in through the window. He even caught himself smiling.
Then, suddenly, Luz sat up in a panic. “Oh my gosh, Hunter! What if they want to kiss me?”
Hunter was startled by her question. “What?”
“What if they go in for a kiss or they expect me to kiss them? What should I do?” She looked fairly panicked about this newfound obstacle.
“Then… you kiss them?” Hunter said hesitantly. “Only if you want to, though.”
“Hunter, I don’t know how to kiss someone!” Luz said incredulously, waving her hands around like a crazy person.
“You- yes you do!” Hunter exclaimed, sitting up in his seat. “You and Amity dated for like six months in high school!”
“Well yeah- but- we never-” Her words tumbled over one another as she attempted to get her thoughts together.
When she couldn’t seem to form a coherent sentence, he asked, “You never kissed her?”
“It never seemed like the right time!” Luz jumped up from the bed and began to pace. “If I don’t know how to kiss someone and they try to kiss me I could make a complete fool of myself!”
“Luz, calm down!” Hunter put his hands out to try and appease her. “It’s not the end of the world if the kiss is bad. You’ll have plenty of chances to try again.”
“B-but a first kiss is supposed to be showstopping!” Luz argued, tugging at the hair tie on her wrist. “It’s supposed to be important with someone you like.”
“Luz, a first kiss won’t ever be perfect because before you’ve kissed someone you’ve never had practice,” Hunter said reasonably. “If you want to kiss your date and want it to be perfect, then… practice with someone.”
“ Practice kissing?” Luz seemed baffled at the idea. “You can’t just practice kissing someone.”
“Sure you can,” Hunter shrugged, reaching for his coffee again. “I suppose you can practice it the way you practice anything else. Just find someone you like and trust enough, and just ask.” He closed his eyes, taking a small sip from the now-cold coffee.
“Okay then hotshot, why don’t I kiss you ?”
Hunter choked on his drink, sputtering his words out.
“You okay?” Her nonchalant tone made Hunter feel even more delirious.
“W- Kiss me ?” Hunter wiped the coffee off of his mouth. “Why would you kiss me?”
“For practice!” Luz laughed, hands on her hips as she looked down at him. “You said it yourself; I just need someone I like and trust enough, and then ask!”
“I meant a close friend or someone you’ve known your whole life or something,” Hunter said quickly.
“Well, you’re one of my best friends, and I’ve known you for eight years, which is almost half of my life, so I think it checks out.” Luz raised an eyebrow at him. “I know you’ve kissed someone before, so you can teach me!”
Hunter was honestly so dumbfounded at how confident Luz seemed to be in her plan, and not at all embarrassed or flustered over it.
“Come on!” Luz looked two seconds away from getting on her knees and begging again, which was definitely not something Hunter needed her to do in this situation. “If I wanna get this right, I have to practice, like you said.”
“And you don’t think it’ll be awkward between us after this?” Hunter asked, searching for any reason to not do this. “Why not ask Willow?”
“Because Willow has a girlfriend and it would be weird,” Luz said, crossing her arms. “Me and you are both single, so it’s not like we’ll be doing anything scandalous.” She raised an eyebrow at him. “What, do you not feel comfortable enough to do that? We don’t have to.”
Hunter pondered her words for a second. He first thought she had no qualms regarding her suggestion, but he realized that she was grasping her sleeves as her arms were crossed over her chest, something he noticed that she did when she was nervous.
“Why are you so worked up about this?” Hunter asked her curiously. “Are you sure it’s just because you want your kiss with them to be perfect?”
Luz hesitated.
“Or… do you just want your first kiss to be perfect?” he suggested finally.
“I don’t-” Luz’s voice was quiet, shy. “I just want to…” She let out a breath through her nose, slowly sitting on the edge of Hunter’s bed again. “I don’t know. I know I want to be good at it, but- I guess the thought of kissing someone for the first time that I’m already comfortable enough around seems like a good way to go about it.”
Hunter blinked at her quietly. So Luz just wanted to have a good first kiss? It wasn’t something that surprised him, because he’s always known her as the girl who believes in fairytale endings and true love, but- kissing him ? That’s something he never would have expected out of her.
He had to admit that as they grew up he’d found her attractive in some form or another, like the summer between his junior year and senior year- they didn’t see each other the entire summer because Luz went to an “adventure” summer camp that she’d thoroughly enjoyed. They saw each other the day after her return, and he remembered the tank top she was wearing and her ripped jeans, and noticed how she seemed to glow after spending three months outside in the sun. Her smile was brighter than ever, however, that might have been because of how happy she’d been to see him after their time apart. He had to bend over to hug her, because of a growth spurt he’d miraculously gone through during those same months of waiting. He blushed at the memory.
“Alright alright alright…” Hunter ran a hand through his hair. “You want to kiss me?”
“For the practice,” Luz said all too quickly, but there was a very prominent blush making itself apparent on her face. “Y’know… So I can get it right.”
“Yeah,” Hunter agreed. “For practice.”
“So…” Luz clenched the fabric of her leggings at the knees. “How… How do you want to do this?”
“Mm…” Hunter rested his chin on his hand, eyes flitting from his desk to the floor, and back again. “One second.” He stood from his seat, stretching his arms up above his head to pop his back. “We could… try something a little weird, but it could work.”
“Shoot,” Luz said, turning her body to face Hunter as he sat himself down on the bed, a little closer to the headboard.
“You like that whole role-playing thing, right?” he asked, and nearly cringed when the words left his mouth.
“I mean… I like to read about it,” Luz said hesitantly, though there was an amused grin on her face. “Where is this going?”
“Not anything like you’re thinking… I think,” Hunter said, raising his hands at her. “It might make it easier if we, like… pretend that we like each other? Hear me out.” He stopped her before she could interrupt him. “If you pretend like I’m the person you want to kiss rather than your best friend it might make it easier to kiss me and not want to throw up.”
Luz chortled. “I’m not going to throw up when I kiss you,” she laughed, making Hunter smile. He’d always liked the way she laughed. “Okay, uh… That could work. It’s worth a try.” She sat up on her knees, facing him confidently. “You should pretend, too!”
“Me?” Hunter reared his head back slightly. “Why do I need to pretend?”
“Because it won’t make any sense if I’m the only one pretending to ‘be in love with you,’” Luz said, making air quotes with her fingers. “The feeling won’t be right!”
Hunter stared at her for a moment before he nodded, pinching the end of his t-shirt. “Okay, I guess you’re right…”
“Aren’t I always?” Luz attempted to flip her hair to give a ‘cool girl’ effect, but it was still a smidge too short for that, so she just looked like she’d attempted to pop her neck out of place. It made Hunter chuckle.
“No. Definitely not.”
Luz glared at him, but Hunter leaned back and beckoned her over with his hands. “You’ve gotta get closer.”
It seemed that the reality of what they were doing had finally set in, because Hunter noticed Luz holding her breath and her body going stiff. She slowly scooted forward on her knees, little by little, until she was sat by Hunter’s thighs. He was sitting back against the headboard, hands in his lap.
“So…” Luz mumbled, raising her hands, holding them there, and it seemed she didn’t know quite what to do with them.
Hunter noticed this and smirked at her. “Don’t you read fanfictions about stuff like this?”
“The fanfics make it look a lot easier than it actually is!” Luz complained, shutting her eyes and clenching her fists.
Hunter couldn’t help but laugh at her, though he quickly tried to quiet down so as to not make her even more flustered. “Here, may I?” He reached out with his hands, only continuing when she nodded in confirmation. He grabbed her wrists gently, drawing them closer to him. He placed them on either one of his shoulders and then slid his hands down to hold her elbows in his palms. He leaned forward but Luz leaned back, causing him to stop.
“You’ve gotta tilt your head a little,” Luz told him.
“I thought I was the one doing the teaching,” Hunter teased her.
“W-well, I know a couple of things!” Luz said defensively. “I just need help going about the actual… kissing part. Just- just tilt your head!”
Hunter shook his head slightly at her, holding in another laugh, but complied.
Luz took it upon herself to lean in first this time, shutting her eyes tight as they got close enough to feel each other’s breath. Hunter’s eyes went half-lidded, because he knew at least one of them would have to be looking this first time to see what they were doing.
He drew her closer with his grip on her arms, though he did it slowly so as to allow her to back out if she truly wanted to. When she didn’t, he tilted his face forward so their lips would meet. However, something felt off. “Luz… you can’t suck your lips in,” he murmured. “That’s not a kiss.”
Luz let out a breath, pulling away just a fraction so she could open her eyes at him. “Sorry, sorry. I want to kiss you. I want to kiss you.” She repeated the phrase to herself quietly, as if she was trying to convince herself of it; it would have hurt Hunter’s feelings a little if he didn’t notice her eyes flitting down to his lips.
“Here, we can make it easier to do this without you having to lean over so far.” He took his hands from her forearms and moved them to her sides, causing her to squeak in surprise when he half-lifted her, dragging her over his thighs so she was now straddling his lap, and they were face-to-face.
“You could’ve asked first, jerk!” She batted his shoulders with her hands, though there was a laugh present in her tone.
“Sorry,” he chuckled. “I’ll ask next time.”
“You seem very confident about that ‘next time,’ Whispers,” Luz whispered in her snarky voice, leaning forward so their foreheads were nearly touching. The harmless, playful grin upturning her lips was much more inviting than the awkward smile she’d offered before, and Hunter’s eyes glittered when they watched her. Luz took it upon herself to slide her hands from his shoulders to either side of his neck, her thumbs tracing his jaw gingerly.
Hunter, meanwhile, kept his hands on the girl’s sides, holding her as if she were a piece of fine China. “In character, right?” he reiterated to her in a questioning voice.
Luz nodded. “Mhm.”
He cleared his throat, blinking a few times before looking up at her through hooded eyes. “You look very beautiful in this light.”
Luz was seemingly taken aback by his statement but seemed to catch on quickly, allowing herself to relax in his arms. “And you look handsome.”
“I look like I’ve just gotten out of bed,” he protested with a slight tilt of his head, as if he was trying to read her.
“Good thing I’m into that sort of thing,” she murmured, her lips brushing his ear. It seemed like she was playing it safe first, placing a short-lived kiss on his cheek where his scar was. She replaced her lips with her hand, sliding it up to cup his scarred skin, and he unconsciously leaned into her touch, his eyes fluttering closed. For some reason, her touch made him feel safe.
His grasp on her waist tightened, and he pulled her down to meet him. They shared each other’s air and space for only a couple of moments before Hunter bit the bullet and pressed his lips to hers. It seemed that Luz was still shy, because for a second she flinched and kept her lips tightened in a straight line, but Hunter remained patient. After a moment she seemed to relax a little, allowing her lips to purse.
They both pulled away pretty quickly, which was expected. The first was going to be awkward, after all.
“Okay, um…. That was alright,” Luz said, clearing her throat.
“Yeah,” Hunter agreed quietly, scratching his chin awkwardly.
“Alright, let’s try again,” his friend said, and there was newfound confidence in her voice.
Hunter hardly had time to return his hand to her side before she dove back in, almost knocking Hunter’s head back against the wall. He was surprised by her forwardness, but returned the same enthusiasm.
Luz tilted her head further into him, deepening the kiss and running one hand up to thread her fingers through Hunter’s hair. Hunter stifled a sound in his throat upon feeling Luz’s hand running across his scalp; he could get addicted to the feeling.
Hunter sat up a little straighter so he could hold her tighter, pushing against her mouth with his own.
They broke away for a second to take in a breath, but immediately reconnected. Their teeth clashed by mistake but neither of them seemed to care, but Hunter’s eyes widened in shock when he felt Luz’s tongue slip between his lips. He reared his head back and Luz did as well, covering her mouth with her hand. “Sorry!” she said, her hand muffling her voice.
Hunter rubbed his mouth with the back of his hand as he looked at her. “Sorry for what?”
Luz lowered her hand a little. “I-” She stopped as if she wasn’t quite sure what to say, but then saw his smirk and giggled.
“Don’t apologize for making me feel good, Luz,” Hunter continued, dramatizing his voice significantly so his acting would make itself known to her.
Luz stuttered a bit at his words, and Hunter was about to say something else, but Luz cut him off by gripping his hair and dragging him back toward her. She wasted no time in pressing her lips against her friend’s again, instantly running her tongue over his bottom lip.
Hunter couldn’t help the small groan that Luz emitted from him, and as a reaction he began to nip at her lips.
Hunter would have been lying if he said that he’d never thought about what it would feel like to kiss Luz. She was a very pretty girl, and in middle school- even high school- he’d carried around a small crush directed at her. He’d never tell her that, though, and never had before. However, he had only kept it to himself to prevent things from being weird between them, and now considering what they were doing, he figured that nothing was off the table in terms of “weird.” He decided that this was a good way for him to release some of that tension that had built up over the years.
Hunter resituated himself, wrapping his arms around Luz’s waist and bringing her closer so that she was more in his lap than on his thighs, and spreading his legs out a bit more so they didn’t cramp up. Luz untucked her legs out from under her, and now their pelvises were pressed flush together as they became more and more caught up in one another. Luz’s fingertips traced Hunter’s jaws and made him lean into her touch, wanting more.
Luz pulled away first this time, taking in a few deep breaths. Her index and middle fingers were pressed against Hunter’s lips, almost in a desiring way. Her eyes were half-lidded and dazed as she stared at Hunter, who looked at her questioningly, although he was pretty much in the same state. “So… How was that?”
“Um… good I think,” Luz confirmed breathlessly, removing her hand from her friend’s mouth but sliding it back to his neck, as well as placing her other hand on the opposite side. He melted against her touch, closing his eyes and burying his face in her neck. “Damn dude, are you, like, touch-starved or something?”
“Mm… Maybe a little,” he mumbled against her skin, making her laugh as his breath tickled her. He looped his arms tighter around her waist, as if he was afraid of letting her go.
“Well… I’d say I’ve got the kissing thing down, but- there’s no harm in… perfecting the practice, right?” Her voice was hesitant, but Hunter found himself nodding along.
“You are right,” he murmured playfully, bringing one hand to her shirt collar and rubbing it between his thumb and index finger.
Luz huffed quietly, biting her lip as her eyes slid shut again. “Just… Just for practice though,” she stated, and Hunter thought it sounded like she was talking more to herself than to him.
“Mmmmhm,” Hunter hummed in response, brushing his lips against her jaw. Her skin there was just as soft as her lips, and he was craving more of her. He didn’t know where this sudden desire came from- maybe it was because he was alone with the pretty girl that he’d been semi-crushing on for years, or maybe it was just the hormones. Regardless of the reason, he knew now that he was probably going to kiss her until she told him to stop. She was addicting.
“Hunter-” She was cut off with a small sound when Hunter kissed her chin and throat, gripping his friend’s wrists gently in his hands. “God…”
“What’s wrong, Luz?” Hunter asked her huskily. “Can’t handle it?”
Luz leaned forward, breaking away from his hold and cupping his face in her hands instead, pulling him into another kiss, a desperate whine escaping her.
Hunter found himself delving further, running his hands under her flannel and tugging at the hem of her shirt underneath.
Luz used her hands to press against Hunter’s chest, pushing him down against the bed and hovering over him. Now she was straddling his waist, leaning down to continue kissing his chapped lips.
Hunter let out an oof as Luz practically laid on top of him, her hair tickling his face as they continued indulging themselves in each other. He pressed his hands more firmly into her sides and slid them up, surprising them both when he was met with her warm skin. He reached around with both hands and trailed them up her spine, making her shake.
Luz broke away with a gasp and was barely able to sit still. Her body winced with every touch Hunter offered her, the nerves in her body going haywire. This was a completely new feeling, so it was only natural that she would want more, right? It had nothing to do with Hunter- at least, that’s what she believed at first.
The way Hunter held and cradled her made her feel protected, loved; she’d felt like that around him the whole time they’d been friends though, so why does now feel any different?
“ You are beautiful ,” Hunter reiterated as he sat up, catching her off guard. He raised her knuckles to his lips and kissed each of them gently, moving up her arm and then to her shoulder. “All of you.” He glided over her neck, nipping at the skin there once as a sort of tease before making it to her face again. He brushed the hair out of her eyes- as it had become quite disheveled during their activities- and placed a feather-light kiss to her lips again. “Beautiful.”
“Careful,” Luz warned him, half joking as she blushed madly at him, “or I might think you aren’t pretending anymore.”
Hunter seemed to remember himself and blinked, lowering his hands. “Yeah. Right.”
Luz’s fingers played with the end of Hunter’s shirt, eyes lowered to avoid his gaze. “Well… I’d say that I got what I was looking for.”
“I was glad to offer my assistance,” Hunter replied, leaning back against the headboard. His usual aloof demeanor had returned, though there was still tension in the air.
“So, uh…” Luz slowly picked herself up off the bed, wincing when she felt her muscles pop. “I’ll… tell you how the date goes?” Her feet hit the ground a little harder than necessary, making Hunter furrow his eyebrows.
“Yeah, you do that,” he replied awkwardly.
Luz stood there for a moment before turning and straightening her flannel, running her hands through her hair to try and fix it to no avail. She offered a quick, high-pitched “bye!” before fumbling with the door handle and exiting the room.
Hunter was left sitting up on his bed, dumbfounded. His mind reeled with the events that just took place, and he found himself gingerly touching his lips, his cheeks- anywhere Luz had touched. He found himself wishing she’d come back. It was a dangerous thought to have.
He tilted his head back toward the ceiling, letting out a long, deep groan.
“Fuck.”