Work Text:
FAGE 15: Endings.
Title: Lost but Gained
Written for: Melody Taylor
Written by: TheDarkestFallingStar
Rating: M
Summary:
If you would like to see all stories for this event head to the community page FAGE 15: Endings. All stories past and present will be posted here. Do not forget to add the C2 to your favorite lists for all new stories as they are posted.
Don't hold your breath
Just know I hold a place
For you always
Dean sighed as he gathered his things roughly, his entire right side aching in ways that should be alarming but has started to become the norm. Honestly, Dean couldn't remember a time in his life that his body wasn't screaming at him in agony.
All he wanted to do was lay down in the bed and sleep for the next three days but he couldn't, he had made a promise to one of the only people that still held some part of him besides Cas and Sam. Fuck.
FUCK!
He eyed the bag before him and then over to the lock box that has sat on the shelf for the last few years since gaining access to the bunker, before that it was hidden in the depths of his car. Before he could blink, he was sitting at his desk with the lockbox in his hand, the combination already half done to unlock.
The memories inside hurt; they were bittersweet. Photographs and little trinkets from what seems like a lifetime ago— were a lifetime ago.
His fingers shook, something he ignored, as he dug through the box and pulled out the polaroids with little doodles and ticket stubs to some small town carnival. It was one of the best nights of his teenage life and as he closed his eyes he could still smell the popcorn, and the hay and hear the sounds of the rides… could still feel the sensation of Isa's lips on his own.
But this wasn't what he was here for, nor was it his to savour any longer.
Memories of long-forgotten, the happier ones were on the top to hide the darkest parts of them, a layer of childish protections. His hand brushed up against something soft, the silk and lace of a memory he ignored the most.
A choked sob tore from his lips though as he pulled out the scarf, the last item he had acquired from Isa all because of his idiocy. It was the last thing she had given to him but not, it was washed but it will forever be stained with his blood.
He could still feel her hands pressing down on the wounds caused by the hellhounds, could still hear her cries as she begged for him to fight, to stay alive.
Please, Dean, I can't lose another person I love… the words were used as a weapon in hell, distorting the memory and even now they still do.
That was their last straw, the last stand so to speak. Oh, they tried when he got back, but the years in hell had changed Dean and the six months had broken Isa.
" We can't keep doing this Dean, we—I can't keep doing this… I can't keep watching you sacrifice yourself." She had pleaded, had nearly screamed.
His throat closed in regret, guilt and agony. "Please Isa, please."
" I will always love you Dean, but we can never… we're too different… I'll always be second to the hunt, to Sam." She whispered as she cupped his face. " Just know I hold a place for you always but it can't be like this anymore."
He understood, God did he understand. "I'll miss you, Isa."
"I know. I will too Dean."
Isabella was the love of his life when he was young, they had grown up together in the sense that their dads were friends and hunters. They saw each other often and when old enough, when Isabella was stuck with a Cold One, Dean was the first person to help her free herself from their control.
They were each other's firsts for many things… but in the end, they both knew they couldn't be, too similar and yet different… their priorities were vastly different and though they tried not to, they always ended up hurting each other.
"Dean we need to go!" Sam's voice jolted him from the memories and caused Dean to shove them aside to dig for what he was truly looking for. There in the depths of his memories rested the necklace he had given Isa long ago, the last token of his mother that he hid from Sam and his father.
Closing his fist around it he shoved the necklace into his pocket and got up, closing the box once more. "I'm coming hold your horses!"
"We're going to be late and I rightly don't want Isa to kill us," Sam said as he shrugged on his jacket, staring at his brother unimpressed. "You know what she's like."
"Better than anyone but she knows what I'm like too," Dean replied with a laugh, smiling softly at Cas who was already waiting by the car. "You sure you want to come?"
"I'll be fine Dean; I have met Isabella before and Paul as well," Cas stated blandly, giving him a look that let Dean know he was fussing again.
Sighing Dean pulled Cas into his arms. "I know Cas, but I also know you're not fond of strangers too and this will be a party full of supes."
"I'll be fine." Cas sighed with a roll of his eyes, shoving Dean back with a fond eye roll. "Let's go."
The drive was a long one, one of idle chatter and laughter. It soothed something within Dean as he let the world fade away till only the Road and family remained. Today will be fine, he's just being paranoid.
When the house came into view the brothers couldn't help but laugh. It was a mimic of Bobby's house and a fortified log cabin. An amalgamation of two people and Dean whistled impressed as he saw the weapons while Sam was amazed by the rune works.
"DEAN! SAM!" Isa yelled with a laugh as she barreled out the door and into their awaiting arms. Her hair was a mess, and she was coated in flour, so very much like Isa that it sent Dean's heart clenching in pain. "You boys came!"
"Of course we did, did you think we wouldn't?" Sam asked with a chuckle, placing Isa back on her feet. "Home life looks good on you Isa."
Bella smiled and did a little twirl, shooting Paul a glare as he snorted from the porch. "Well, half a home life. Haven't retired fully, still do hunts but mainly I'm the go to when people need help. But I'm happy."
"Good, that's what we want to hear." Dean chuckled as he pulled himself out of his funk and glanced at Paul. "Where's the rest of the pack, thought they'd ambush us like usual when we hit the drive."
Paul smirked and cocked his head back to gesture. "They're busy fighting over who is setting the bonfire up, the imprints already did it and we're waiting to see how long it takes for them to notice."
"Still the same huh?"
"Of course, Sam, Cas I'll need your help for a moment," Paul replied as he pushed himself off the porch, giving Isa a kiss on her brow as he pulled the two with him towards the back.
Dean turned to Isa with a frown. "What's wrong?"
"Dean, I know how hard today is for you and I'm so glad you came." Isa started soft, wrapping her arm through his. "Thank you for doing this for me."
"Isa, I love you, of course, I'd do this for you." He replied, pulling them both to a stop. "Fuck Sable, I thought we were both over this. I'm okay, I promise. Would I lie to you about this?"
Bella eyed her friend before her, searching for any sign of discomfort or lie. Oh, she knew that he wouldn't, knew that their love was different but still she worried. Sighing softly she nodded and began to lead them towards the side garden once more. "Still I worry, at one point this was going to be us."
The little ceremony spot that was for her and Paul's wedding was beautiful, exactly how she wanted it.
"I know, but we were both right… you were right." Dean replied with a sigh, turning to face her once more. "We were too different, all we would have done is destroy each other and I never wanted—want that. But enough of that, I have something for you."
"Wha…" She trailed off as Dean pulled out the necklace, one that was his mother's and had worn herself long ago. "Dean…?"
"I want you to wear this for today, Isa, something old and borrowed if you want for luck. It was always yours." He replied softly, moving to clasp it around her neck and sighing. "Mom would have wanted you to have it and Dad would have too. You were a daughter to him too."
"I wish they were here for this, but I'm glad it's you." She replied watery, letting the moment linger for a moment longer.
A soft fond smile pulled at her lips as his gaze flickered from hers to where the others were laughing in the backyard, his eyes soft and glazed in a look she had never seen on his face before. She had seen it on hers in photos and on Paul's, oh she sees it on the Angels as well. "I'm happy it happened Dean, we were never meant to be, our paths were destined for others. Me with a shifter of all things and you an Angel."
"Yeah, never expected that." Dean chuckled as he smiled at his lover when he glanced up, heart thumping wildly as he smiled in return. "But I wouldn't change it for the world."
"Neither, now shall we go join our loves before they set something on fire?" She asked with a laugh.
Dean snorted and pulled her into a side hug. "We all know that out of Paul and Cas, it's us that sets things on fire Isa."
Laughter rang out through the air as Bella shoved Dean into the bushes and ran, leaving the spluttering and cursing hunter behind.
No, they were not meant to be but that didn't stop them from loving each other. Nothing was lost but everything gained because that's how love goes.
Author Note: Well... yes... this... XD