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Chapter 2: Alternative Ending

Summary:

Angsty hihi

Chapter Text

Not long enough, after a few weeks since this lady moved in, Sunghoon would sense Riki's eyes sparkle whenever the young lady was around or seen in the view. Riki would also find himself sneaking a glance to take a peek at the woman from time to time but ends up staring at her for more than half an hour. He was so mesmerized that he could only watch her from afar. Riki was struck by cupid so hard with this arrow that he usually gets this tingling feeling that has been tugging on his stomach more often. What's more, at some point in his life, he had the urge to paint thousands of portraits for her, only for her. He claimed that he wouldn't get tired if that were the case.

Noticing Riki's recent behavior did not sit well with Sunghoon in 101 languages. All he could do was pathetically kick Riki's behind and yell at him to get back to work instead of staring across the road. He'd always catch Riki's peek through the glass doors to see the lady raking a few fallen leaves from the tree near her shop. The next day, Sunghoon noticed him painting another piece. Riki seemed to have poured too much emotion into it, as he swept the paintbrush across the canvas while smiling. A few days later, Riki asked to excuse himself on his day off. He mentioned that he was going on a date with the you-know-lady. He looked so well-dressed for the first time in his life. It obviously made Sunghoon bitter, 'oh, they're already going on a date...?'
The same very day, unsurprisingly, he saw a portrait of an anticipated young woman, smiling with a streak of sunlight across her face and a straw hat covering the side of her face where the sunlight struck. A small yet meaningful feature: a pink camellia. The woman was embracing a flower that Sunghoon recognized as a camellia. It was really stunning—no, make that virtually faultless.

Sunghoon felt another pinch in his chest, but this time it was hundreds, thousands, and millions. His stomach knotted, he felt a lump in his throat, and he couldn't make a sound whatsoever. He left the room because something told him to. Hesitantly.

Still zoning out, he stood on the balcony, taking a deep breath and praying the sensation would pass. His eyes, on the other hand, were beginning to betray him. He suddenly thought of drinking to clear his thoughts after another deep exhale in the hopes of settling this emotion down.

That night, his solitude helped him relax a little. Every sip and every pour of booze in the tiny glass seemed to soothe his burning jealousy. He drank and drank till he felt it was enough; although it was not. He just so happened to doze out.

Riki, who was out on a "date" with the woman of his dreams, finally arrived—late—after Sunghoon dozed out. He gently tiptoed inside the apartment, where audible creaks could be heard, in the hopes of not waking Sunghoon up and avoiding scolding. He was going to pass by the living room when he noticed feet. Inhaling sharply because it surprised him, he carefully walked closer in curiosity and met a dozed-off Sunghoon. Sunghoon was murmuring gibberish under his breath and making small adorable movements with his fingers, despite the fact that he appeared to be sleeping.

Riki let out a genuine, quiet giggle in response to the sight. It was the first time he had seen Sunghoon sleep in such a state. Reality struck him. Sunghoon was sleeping on the floor rather than the couch, and five bottles of alcohol encircled the inactive sleepyhead, which he had overlooked earlier. It caused Riki to sigh slightly. After cleaning out the bottles, he strolled over to Sunghoon's sleeping state and softly stroked his cheek as he tapped it, whispering, "Hoon-ah, get up and go to your bedroom. It's not good sleeping on the floor; you might catch a cold the next day. It's frigid out here." Sunghoon clearly did not budge, leaving Riki with no choice but to carry him to his (Sunghoon's) room.

"Really, you're such an infernal nuisance. You can't change my mind about that." Riki huffed. In the middle of bearing Sunhoon to his room, Riki stopped as soon as he heard Sunghoon mumble his name in a sentence.
"You... Riki... You, uhh... Stop. Stop hooting m... Stay 'way from hrr 'nd louk at me... Fo' once..." Riki rose his brow, the latter's voice finally getting clearer, "Just a genuine soft look would be enough, if you can't do that, then a painting for me is enough. 'm jealous..." As Sunghoon continued to babble shit, Riki froze on his spot, eyes as wide as an owl's as he tried to review the other's words again. A sober Sunghoon would probably smack him and order him to forget what he said in pure flustered-ness. Riki didn't know what to do until he remembered Sunghoon was unconscious and drunk, he probably won't remember his words the next day, for the better. So Riki tried to brush it off as he continued to walk, his grip on Sunghoon tightening. Oh no, he suddenly heard a giggle coming from the unconscious man in his arms, although his giggle appeared to be more conscious than before. "Yes, please do ignore my remarks." he heard as he felt Sunghoon tucking his head on his chest.

Riki's heartbeat drummed faster than Mcqueen as he heard another mumble, this time, it was muffled since Sunghoon was hiding his face under Riki's chest, avoiding eye contact with the latter as soon as possible;" Right, you would. I don't have the right to butt in anyways, I don't want to make you feel bulldozed or something."
Riki gulped a huge amount of saliva, "You're not fully conscious of your words... Aren't you..?"

"Not fully, but I had just woken up by your stupidity," Sunghoon replied with a bitter laugh.

"Let's bring you to your room now, your head must hurt." Riki avoided.

"With me in your arms?"

"Ye-"

"I'm not worthy, please let me go." Before Riki could reason, Sunghoon effortlessly removed Riki's hands from his waist, as well as his shoulders, now standing in front of him as darkness filled his face.

Riki sighed, rubbing his temples, "Fine, at least let me escort you to your room."

"No, don't wanna. I'm older than you, what makes you think I can't walk on my own?" Sunghoon spat, he'd be lying if he says his head is not spinning badly. However, in a situation like this, it's better to lie.

"Hoon, don't be stubborn, please?" After hearing this Sunghoon glares sharply at him, he hates it when Riki calls him that. His stomach would twist and flutter. His heart would raise, he hates it. It makes him want to deny more.

"I can be stubborn whenever I want, Riki."

Riki's brows met each other, what's with him? Weren't they fine a while ago? Although they were bickering, it was an argument with no hard feelings. Why did 'this' argument feel like it has something that needs to be avoided? "Hey, look here. What did I do now to make you seriously angry? What can I do to fix that anger of yours?" he bluntly asked, his eyebrows still knitted.

Oh, this made Sunghoon burst, "What did you do? I also don't know. Your whole existence is just so stupid it also makes me feel so stupid. I wish I never met you, if I didn't who knows if I would still feel this stupid feeling. I hate your stupid eyes for making me feel like shit, it looks at her as if she's your whole world, the reason for your existence, your deity, your goddess, and everything that you can name! It makes me feel like shit because you never looked at me like that. Though I don't blame you for it, she's the one that you love while I... Ah, yes. I am just a friend. I don't even know why I have these special feelings for you, it makes me feel so stupid to like a man who is just deemed as my housemate.

Looking at you fall for another hurts so bad. I was there, I was always there. yet it makes me wonder why you never do things to me the same way as you do to her. She's just so special while I sit far from the two of you, seeing you admire her while I admire you. I tried so hard to hide this flaming jealousy inside me yet here I am, talking about my feelings in front of you. What can you do to fix 'this' anger of mine? There's no way of fixing this. I'm begging you to stop hurting me, I don't know how to avoid these feelings of stupidity. I don't even know what I'm saying right now. Just... please..." he sobbed. He knew there was no way out of this, so he let it be.