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Not-So-Private Speculation

Summary:

The crew of the Lost Light get attacked (again), and Swerve and Ultra Magnus end up spending some alone time together.

Well, Swerve spends some alone time with his feelings and Ultra Magnus is somewhat present.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

Swerve checked the door for what must have been the 50th time. Like every other time, it was still locked.

The power had been out for a while, cutting off the door controls and locking them in. The only light was a small glow that filtered in through the vents at the top of the room.

Swerve sighed and sat down next to Ultra Magnus's unconscious form. "Well, I guess we'll be here a while, eh Sir?"

Ultra Magnus was silent, just like he'd been for the last half hour.

At least this time it wasn't his fault that the large mech had fallen unconscious. Really, it was his own fault, or at least the Raider's fault.

They'd picked up a trading outpost on their sensors, and decided to stop and refuel. But when the ship had arrived, they'd found it completely abandoned. Rodimus reasoned there still might be some supplies they could use, so he'd sent out small scouting groups.

Swerve and Ultra Magnus had accidentally ended up in the same group, along with Drift and Rewind. They'd found no trace of supplies, but plenty of signs of gunfire and violence, which had Ultra Magnus comming the ship multiple times, requesting to turn back. But Rodimus said they weren't going to leave empty handed.

So they'd pressed on, despite the growing feeling of foreboding. When they'd been walking for almost 2 hours, suddenly the entire outpost shuddered, and the commline exploded with requests for assistance. They tried to turn back, but suddenly a whole hoard of people, which Ultra Magnus had shouted as Raiders, started pouring into the hallway, drastically outnumbering them. They'd been driven forward, trying to fight off the attacks from behind. At a fork in the hall, Swerve and Ultra Magnus had been separated from the others, and the last Swerve saw of them was Drift yelling at Rewind to run while turning to face the hoard alone.

Ultra Magnus had grabbed his arm and half-dragged him away. He told Swerve to keep running while he covered their retreat. He'd run all the way to the next fork in the hallway before looking back, seeing Ultra Magnus steadily being backed towards him, shooting back at the advancing group, before turning and thundering down the hall.

Then all of a sudden his entire frame went rigid. His optics widened and flickered, and he collapsed in a heap.

Swerve had cursed furiously and sprinted back to where he lay. The Raiders were almost on them. Then Swerve realized he'd fallen right next to a door, and, in a feat of adrenaline fueled strength, he'd shoved Ultra Magnus's massive form as hard as he could and somehow got him through the door. As fast as he could, he threw himself inside and slammed the button to shut it.

And then the power went out.

And so the last half hour had passed, Ultra Magnus' still frame leaning limp against the wall, while Swerve examined the room, checked the door, checked the comms, chatted, mostly to himself, and did basically anything to keep himself from thinking.

"Don't worry, Magnus, I'm sure they'll be out looking for us. I mean, if it was just me, they probably wouldn't notice until we were half a star system away. But they'll definitely notice if you're not back. I'm pretty sure you're the only reason the ship's still running."

Swerve paused, even though he knew Magnus couldn't reply.

"How do you think these- whad'ya call them- Raiders? How'd they find us? How'd you know what they were, 'cause I've never even heard of them. Raiders- so they raid stuff? Does that mean we just happened to come up on this place while they were raiding it?" He scoffed. "Typical, isn't it."

It was getting rather comical how many awful, terrifying, or just plain ridiculous situations the Lost Light just happened to stumble upon. Swerve normally wouldn't have minded, he had wanted to go on an epic adventure, after all. But he could definitely do without the constant threat of agonizing death looming over them.

Swerve sighed and tapped his feet together. He checked his comm and his signal again. "Still nothing. They're probably still too busy dealing with the raiders to notice my signal- wait a second." He turned towards Magnus. "Is your signal activated. Did you have time, or were you too busy, too?" He paused for a bit, forgetting that he couldn't respond. "Oh right….wait, I can check."

He pulled up his display again, but it only confirmed that Ultra Magnus' distress signal was not online.

"Slag. Well….I guess I'll have to turn it on manually."

Swerve would have to climb over Magnus to get to his left arm, which held his manual comm controls. He hesitated.

"Sorry, Mags, but they're more likely to notice your signal than mine. And it wouldn't be that much of a problem if you weren't so fragging big."

Swerve carefully clambered up onto one of Magnus' thighs, then carefully scooted over to the other one, trying not to scuff his paint. Magnus wouldn't be happy with him when he woke up.

If he woke up.

Swerve quickly shook his helm to banish the thought. Sliding off Magnus' still form, he knelt in front of his forearm, turning it so the display would face up.

"Okay Mags, how do I get this thing open?" Swerve poked at the panel, then tapped on it, then wedged his fingers in the seam and tugged.

The panel popped open with a clang, and the bright holographic display popped up. He could see several other crew manners had activated their distress beacons, and several comms were pinging, but it wouldn't allow Swerve to answer them. Apparently Magnus' receiver was still shut down.

Swerve fiddled around with the controls to find which one was the beacon. A lot of them he found did nothing at all, one adjusted the brightness, and one switch made Ultra Magnus' shoulder missiles give a few ominous clicks, so Swerve made sure not to touch that one again.

Then he pushed a particular button, and soft music started coming out of Ultra Magnus' frame. Swerve recognized it as one of the former enforcer's favorite songs, and decided to let it play.

Finally, he clicked the right one, and Magnus' own signal flickered onto the display. Swerve flipped closed the panel with a triumphant grin.

"There. Now they'll be sure to find us in no time. I didn't know you had music files stored on you, Mags. I bet you just turn it on when you're ignoring someone. Probably the only thing that keeps you sane when Megs and Rodimus are going at it."

He paused for a second, considering the idea. "But you do always try to pay attention when you're in a conversation. You always put down your paperwork, and I know how hard that is for you. You even pay attention to me when I'm talking. Or at least when we're having a conversation- which actually isn't all that often. You usually don't really try to talk to anyone, and I'm….well, I'm me…."

He sighed. "Anyway, it's probably pretty weird that I pay attention to all this stuff, who you talk to and how and all that. Ha ha ha…." He trailed off, wondering if he should really stop talking. Swerve decided Magnus was probably offline, so it was safe enough. "And that's not even all of it. I've noticed your music and reading preferences. How lots of the data pads in your office are about history, like not just Cybertronian history, but the history of some of the colonies and the Galactic Council and whole bunch of others. I even remember that you don't like historical fiction cause that's- how did you say it? "Using important events to tell false, heavily exaggerated, fanciful, and often opinionated tales."" He gave a small chuckle at the memory.

"But you do have a few fiction novels in your habsuite. I only got a glance at them one time I was in there, but I'm 70 percent sure one of them was a romance novel. And you listen to quite a few romantic songs." He nudged Magnus' side, grinning. "I'm pretty sure underneath all that armor you're a big ole sap."

Magnus, like always, was still and quiet. Swerve rubbed his face. "And I can even see your reaction to me saying this. You'd be all surprised and embarrassed, and your face would get a little red right under your optics. Then you'd cover it up with a frown. Not your mad frown, just your disapproving one, and you'd be all like, "Swerve, I don't see how any of this is your business. Kindly keep out of my personal life before I give you an invasion of privacy citation."" He sighed, the image of Ultra Magnus very clearly doing that in his mind.

But the real Ultra Magnus stayed silent, unmoving. Moreso than usual. There'd be no way Magnus would let half the things he'd just said slide. Something was definitely wrong. What had those Raiders hit him with that made him just….shut down like this. Sounded like something Brainstorm would cook up. But it had already nearly been an hour, and Magnus showed no signs of waking up. And Swerve had no idea how to help him. What if it was some virus that was attacking his insides? What if it had killed Minimus, and the suit was powered on its own? What if Magnus didn't wake up?

“No.” Swerve shook his head furiously, trying to clear those thoughts from his processor. He rested a hand on Magnus’ forearm, and glared up at him. “You’re gonna be fine. You’ve survived way worse than anything these Decepticon wannabes can throw at you. We just have to wait until the others can turn the power back on and come find us, then Ratchet will look you over and work his magic and you’ll be perfectly fine and I’ll look ridiculous for worrying.”

The familiar silence filled the room again. It put Swerve more on edge. He huffed and crossed his arms. “I kind of wish you could hear me, though. For some reason, whenever we get to talk or bond or whatever, you always end up incapacitated or…. I don’t know.” Swerve felt his spark sink. “But incapacitated is probably the only way you’d actually talk to me. Or let me talk to you, really.”

He sighed and rested his head in his servos. The silence pressed in around him, almost suffocating. “I mean, it's not like you’d want to talk to anybody, but out of everyone on the ship, or on Cybertron, even, I’d definitely be at the bottom of the list. I mean, I’m even at the bottom of my list of people I want to talk to……though I’m usually the only person I can….”

Swerve shook his head again. Not going down that train of thought. He tried to backtrack. “But if you tried, lots of people would like you. I mean, you’re likeable already, just a little intimidating. If anyone actually knew what you liked to do, I’m sure tons of people would want to hang out with you. I mean, I do……well, kind of. It’s a little weird. Like, I know more about you than most folks, and what you like wouldn’t normally interest me. But I still…I don’t know. Want to be around you, I guess?”

Swerve wasn’t sure what he was talking about anymore, but it wasn't like anyone could hear him. “I’m not sure why I would want that, though. You’ve never wanted to hang around me. But- I don’t know. Sometimes I try to swing by wherever you’re at, even if I play it off by talking with someone else. And whenever you end up at my bar I always play a song you like, to try to get you to stay longer. Maybe I just like seeing you. I know I like seeing you relax- you’re always so tense all the time! First Aid told me that’s bad for you, that stress can cause a whole bunch of problems. Plus when you relax you tolerate me for longer. I also like seeing you smile, although I’ve only seen that a couple times. Once when Ratchet made a snarky comment that managed to shut up both Megs and Rodimus, and once when Nautica told that weird grammar joke. I didn’t get it, but I was glad it made you smile. I mean, if a joke about grammar couldn’t do it, absolutely nothing would. But smiles look handsome on you- not that you don’t look handsome the rest of the time….”

All at once, the realization of what he was saying finally caught up to Swerve. It felt like he’d been hit by a train.

It was several seconds before he could form words.

“….I…I’m in…I’m in love with you….aren’t I?” It was barely a whisper.

Silence filled the small room for several minutes.

Until Swerve clapped a servo to his face. “I’m such a slaghead.”

How in the hell had he not realized this till now? It’s not like the evidence wasn't staring him in the face, namely in the massive form of the former Duly Appointed Enforcer of the Tyrest Accords?!

Swerve turned to look at Ultra Magnus, still reeling from his realization.

Then he felt his spark plummet to his pedes.

Laughter came unbidden from his vocalizer. “Of course. I am such a slaghead. Of course…of course I would fall in love with the mech who I have absolutely 0 chance with. Of course…” His face fell into his hands.

“It’s not like you see me as anything more than a nuisance. It’s not like the strongest emotion you feel towards me is mild disdain. It’s not like-“ Swerve’s voice fell to barely a whisper. “Not like you would smile a lot more if I wasn't around to bother you.”

Swerve couldn’t bring himself to break the silence again.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Hours later, Back on the Lost Light, things had progressed much as Swerve had predicted. The crew members still on the ship had staged a counterattack, decimating the Raiders, and eventually managed to bring the power back up.

There were no casualties, but many others had suffered the same fate as Ultra Magnus, and spent a few hours in the medbay recuperating. Ratchet said it was some kind of primitive immobilizer, not designed for but effective on Cybertronians. It didn’t take long for him to reverse the effects.

Through totally not eavesdropping, Swerve worked out the time that Ultra Magnus would be released from the medbay, and arranged to “pass by” just as the mech was leaving. Yes, he’d realized why he felt the inclination to do so, and knew he had no chance, but that didn’t mean he felt the urge to stop.

It turns out he’d managed to time it perfectly, and the massive mech strode out, as imposing as ever, just in time to see Swerve strolling down the hallway.

“Heya, Mags- Magnus, I mean. Feeling better? Getting hit with one of those immobilizers can't be the best feeling in the world.”

“No, but not necessarily the worst.” He crossed his arms. “Actually Swerve, I was coming to find you. There is something I wish to ask you.”

“About what happened after you passed out? Or got knocked out, really.”

“No, it’s something else.” Ultra Magnus didn’t elaborate. Instead, he turned on his pede and strode down the hall, leaving Swerve to dash after him to catch up.

Swerve was a little nervous, but not as much as he might have been. If it had been about what had happened after he’d been knocked out, he’d be mortified that Magnus might have heard some of what he’d said, and would reject him, or worse, be disgusted.

But apparently it wasn’t about that. It was probably about something someone said to him while he was in the medbay, or something he’d been planning to talk to him about today anyway. Ultra Magnus wouldn’t let something like being ambushed and paralyzed for a few hours stop him from getting his job done.

That kind of conviction totally wasn’t attractive. Nope. Not at all. Why on earth would it be?

Swerve tried to shake all these thoughts from his head, and realized Ultra Magnus had stopped walking.

They were in the oil reservoir. How had they gotten all the way here without him noticing? Swerve must have been more anxious than he realized.

Ultra Magnus turned to him and did something quite unexpected. He crouched down, sitting on one of his pedes, so that he was closer to Swerve’s height. Swerve tried not to flinch as his intense stare was brought that much closer to him.

Magnus seemed to hesitate.

“I would appreciate it if this conversation stayed between us.”

Swerve’s spark flipped. Magnus was entrusting him with something secret! Magnus trusted him to keep a secret!

“Of course, yeah, yeah. Besides what most people say, I can keep a secret. Yeah, I talk a lot, but it’s just a matter of talking about something that’s not the thing your trying to keep secret. There's a whole hoard of other gossip to-“

“When is it appropriate to kiss someone?” Magnus said the words fast, as if he was afraid he’d lose his nerve.

Swerve stalled for a second. Well that was certainly unexpected. Why on earth would Ultra Magnus of all bots want to know that?

Swerve felt a sharp pain in his spark. Because he wanted to kiss someone, obviously. And he’d come to Swerve because….well, Swerve didn’t really know why Magnus had come to him, it’s not like he’d had a lot of experience in this area. But that did mean one thing for certain.

It wasn’t Swerve he wanted to kiss

Swerve forced his faceplates into a smile, ignoring the pain in his spark. Magnus had come to him, that at least meant he saw something in him didn’t it? “Really, Mags? I thought it was against the law for you to kiss, or even like anyone, for that matter! Why’d you come to me for this, anyway. Wouldn’t someone like Rodimus or Drift or even Ratchet know a lot more about this?”

Magnus frowned. “It’s Ultra Magnus, and I would assume it doesn’t take a great amount of experience to know such a thing. Please, just answer it.”

Swerve wringed his servos, shoving down the crumbling feeling in his chest. “Fine, fine. Well, I guess it would depend on your partner? Like, if they like PDA and all that then lots of kisses would be fine, but if they're more reserved then maybe only in private? And it would depend on how well you know them. I mean, you can’t just go kissing random people you walk by!”

Swerve gave a halfhearted laugh, but Ultra Magnus only nodded, seriously. He coughed and continued. “Like, I guess if you knew they liked you, and you wanted them to know you reciprocate, then it’d be okay. But other than that it’d just be your partner. And people sometimes give kisses instead of talking, like for saying good morning, or bye, or whatever. So….it’s just, anytime, I guess.”

Ultra Magnus stared at him thoughtfully, then nodded. “I see. Thank you for your assistance, Swerve. You’ve been very informative.”

Swerve tried to stifle a sigh. “Yeah, no problem, Mags. What are friends fooaaaAAAAHH!”

Swerve suddenly felt Ultra Magnus scoop him up and pull him close. His surprise was suddenly muffled by a pair of lips.

They were surprisingly soft, but firm, and reassuring against his mouth. And before he knew it he was pressing back, melting into the kiss and letting the slow, gentle motion of the others lips guide his own. He felt his arms wrap around Magnus’s neck to try and pull him closer, and a soft sigh escaped out of him.

Eventually, they drifted back, Swerve feeling a little dizzy. Magnus’ gaze was incredibly soft, and he could feel his warm ex-vents on his face.

Then Swerve’s processor finally caught up to what was happening, and his cheeks started burning. “Did we….I mean….you just….what….”

Magnus shifted his hold on Swerve slightly, so he could bring a hand up to his face and stroke his cheek lightly. “Your chances are not as low as you tell yourself."

Swerve’s jaw dropped open. He started burning hotter, and he was certain Magnus could feel it. “You could hear me. You heard what I said.”

“Every word.” Magnus’ gaze suddenly turned much more serious. “And you judge yourself far too harshly. I may not be the most sociable of mechs, but that doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy your company, and that certainly doesn’t mean I want you gone.”

“B-but, you always avoid me!”

“We barely come into contact for any work related purposes. And I was under the impression you thought I was a boring, serious, “mood killer” as I’ve heard it put. I thought you preferred my absence.”

“No!” Swerve said, a little too loudly, gripping the ridges in Magnus’ armor tightly. Magnus' optics widened at the volume.

Swerve tried to compose himself. “I mean- no, no, of course not.”

“Well, for that I am glad.”

Swerve was vaguely aware of Magnus saying other things, but all he could process was the way Magnus’ arms wrapped around him and held him to his chest, their fields gently mingling together, how nice his fingertips felt in their small strokes over his cheek, and the way his mouth had twisted up into a small smile, striking him with how handsome he looked.

Without thinking, Swerve leaned back up and pressed another kiss to his lips. Magnus gave a little start, but then gently reciprocated it. He was dimly aware that Magnus was a surprisingly good kisser, but mostly he was focused on the way Magnus felt, that he was actually holding him and kissing him and that this wasn't a dream.

After a while, or maybe just a moment, Magnus gently pulled back, resting their helms together. Swerve couldn't stop the wide grin that swept over his face.

"Is that a yes?"

Swerve stared at him. "To what? Sorry, I got distracted for a second."

Ultra Magnus gave an exasperated ex-vent, but his smile contradicted it. "I had asked if you would allow me to court you."

"Oh…." Swerve was back to feeling a bit dizzy. It was only when Magnus' smile began to fall that he realized he hadn't answered. "Oh! I mean- yeah,! Yes, of course- uh, if you want."

Swerve's spark felt a little fluttery when Magnus looked noticeably releived.

He was about to go in for another kiss, when suddenly a quiet pinging came from Magnus' comm. The large mech looked down and gave a deep ex-vent.

"That, I'm afraid, is my signal to go on shift."

Swerve was aghast. "B-but you just got out of the medbay. You were paralyzed, ambushed, for Primus' sake! Can't they give you a break?"

Ultra Magnus carefully set Swerve back on the ground. "Half of the other mechs on this ship were also ambushed. Unexpected events are no cause to abandon your duty."

Swerve tried not to feel disappointed, and as Magnus was letting go, he quickly grabbed his servo. Really he ended up wrapping his arms around Magnus' forearm and hugging it.

"After! I mean- when you get off shift we- well I can get Bluestreak to watch the bar for me and we could- I don't know, watch a movie- or just talk, or have some energon I guess- but, anything you want to do we-"

Magnus cut him off with another kiss. Primus, Swerve liked it when he did that. It was short, but Magnus came away smiling.

"That would be agreeable."

Swerve just answered with a laugh.

Notes:

Hope you enjoyed! This is my first fic posted (copied from my Tumblr. ) Comments and feedback are always appreciated :)

Also this is my first fic posted on here so I'm just gonna assume I'm doing all this right.

This pairing needs more love. I love them both to death but no one else ships it so I'm like fine, I'll do it myself.

Have a good day!