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Death and rebirth.
Not concepts I had really thought about in my life. Rebirth had no scientific evidence and though death was certain. Thinking about the end of my life was not something I had precisely liked to do. It would only end up making me depressed and so I always distracted myself. I knew it would come for me eventually. After all, no one manages to survive life alive.
Naturally when my time came, I did not expect it. And I expected my rebirth even less.
The whole chain of events was traumatic, but being a young infant gave me a lot of time to think and process so I could come to terms with my losses and that I had a new life and family. It would not be fair to them to constantly compare them to what I had in a completely another life.
What took me a long time to come to terms with as well was that though I was reborn as a humanoid – I could tell I had two hands, two feet and a head in roughly similar locations as a human – I was not human.
My ears were notably lower than I was used to, and I had no hair. Though the latter was not unusual for a baby. My new parents did not have any hair either. They had very large heads, protected from behind by a crownlike bone-structure beginning from their temples where a human would expect to have hair and the tops of their heads were bald.
It seemed to me that the clearest indication of genders were the height of the individual and the ‘thorniness’ of the bone-crown. As far as I could tell, females were shorter and had generally smoother crowns while males had slightly larger and more pronged crowns.
Facial features, while similar to a human, lacked any hair. No eyebrows or beard-growth on any adult I saw. So, whatever I had been born as probably lacked hair-growth altogether.
Due to my next observation, it made even more sense. I had been reborn into a highly technological society. The first time I saw space from a viewport of a spaceship I was stunned and awed. I was a member of a spacefaring race.
Developing functional space travel, that anyone may use, requires millennia of social and evolutional development. So, during that time any outward features that were no longer necessary – such as hair, if my new species had ever need of such – would have slowly, generation by generation, deteriorated away.
Seeing myself in a mirror strengthened the impression of being alien. I did not look at all like myself from when I had been a human. My facial features were clearly inherited from my new parents instead of my previous life. As I was little more than a baby, I was obviously small, but one other factor that made it clear that I was young was the lack of a fully formed bone-crown.
I could tell already where my own would end up growing, but I did not yet have anything more than the bare beginnings. And it made sense. Trying to give birth to someone with a fully formed bone-crown did not make any sense evolutionally, since giving birth to a child with a fully formed bone-crown would likely just kill both mother and child, unless the method of making young was completely different for my new species – which, for the record, I will not believe until I see some evidence; there are far too many similarities to humans to believe otherwise – but that is probably enough speculation. A society that is so highly developed is sure to have competent education for its children. I will most likely find out along my normal schooling.
But first came knowing my new family. My name in this new life is Lian. My parents are Levann and Sulier. I am an only child as far as I can tell, so I am probably their eldest child. (Or they have long lifespans, and their previous children are all grown and there is some reason children are not raised with siblings… I really need something else to occupy my time, all this time to think is making me speculate far too complicated things…)
During my first cycle – probably the local year, I am pretty sure the day and other cycles differed from those of earth but estimating the passage of time as a child is hard – my bone-crown grew rapidly. The two pieces grew connected to each other and became much wider until I had a miniature version of an adult minbari’s head-bone.
My first challenge was to learn to communicate effectively. Learning the language of my new family took time, but apparently less than was expected. My parents were extremely proud of me. As I had expected, showing intelligence that was possibly higher than normal for a human child my age was not alarming. And I had the sneaking suspicion that minbari were more intelligent than the baseline human – not that pure intelligence necessarily has to mean anything – so an intelligent child should not be too big of a surprise.
And I was right. Beyond a small head start, due to early awareness, I was actually rather normal among the minbari – I had learned alongside the language that my new species was that of the minbari people – children, intelligence wise. Much of the information that we learned even as children was completely new to me. Easy math for children was somewhere around high school math and after we reached university level, pretty much everything was new information and apparently part of the basic education.
I was thrilled. This meant that I did not need to hold back at all. I was acknowledged as gifted, but most of the information we were taught was not something I had learned before, so I could avoid feeling like I had cheated. I eventually grew especially interested in the history of the minbari and biology and ecosystems of our home planet.
All in all, I am growing as a normal child of the minbari, born to two minbari of the religious caste of the Family of Zir, Lian of Zir, and I intend to enjoy this new childhood and new life to its fullest.
I knew I was born into the religious caste, but it took some time before I actually realized what it meant. I knew the word that preceded my caste of course, but the meaning only came after we began learning about our religion and beliefs.
Learning that reincarnation was taken seriously by my new people both did and did not come as a surprise. I was a reborn soul after all. Of course, nothing said that the souls would remember or not be minbari in their previous lives, so I could not exactly say anything. But I wondered if someone like me had led to the belief in the first place. In any case, I took an immense amount of solace that I lived in a culture where it was not only believed possible but imminent, unless the soul was caught by the soul hunters. That real-life horror story and proof of a soul’s existence that actually being able to capture it provided was chilling. I imagined being caught in what basically amounted to a glass orb for all of eternity… without any joys or comforts of life… I would go insane. I was extremely surprised that young children were told such stories, but well, on second thought, they were probably at least partly the boogiemen to scare children into behaving themselves, at least in religious caste families. And when truth was more chilling than fiction, I was unsurprised that monster stories had fallen out of favor.
In contrast, the universe having a collective soul and expressing itself through sentient life by giving sentients a piece of itself was less chilling yet not entirely benign either, as that includes all beings, both kind and cruel.
Religious tales of the elder days are my favorite parts of our religious education. They combine history with myths and mythical elements. Valen and the Shadow War – and all the tales, songs and records related to it – are especially interesting, since, though it happened a millennium ago, minbari were advanced enough technologically to be spacefarers and due to that many records survived, though not all are accessible to the public.
Of the older tales, Valeria of Light and Order is fascinating as well. Partly due to nostalgia, but also due to his resemblance to the angels I remember from being human. Valeria was said to stand for Light and Order, a force of Good. According to legends, he did not shy from shedding blood when necessary, however, and was an accomplished warrior. In a fewer number of the legends, Valeria was sad to be hardworking and humble.
So, a good religious figure, excellent warrior and humble worker in a single being? Obviously divine. (…that sounded like some kind of poor slogan)
A divine warrior on the side of good was pretty good match for an angel, a “Warrior of God”, though Valeria was not said to work under anyone and was only singular. Though angels were meant to love and serve men, an order which lead to the divide of the angels and the creation of the devil, Valeria was not. But Valeria was humble worker as well.
Then we have Valeria’s unnamed contemporary, so despised by the minbari that their very name – and much of the related information – was purged from records (which seems kind of stupid in my opinion, since if he returns, we have no reliable information on him, but it is a myth, so no one really expects his return). And then even more records of the old legends were lost once Valen became more prominent religious figure to the minbari people.
The Unnamed One who stood for Dark and Chaos and incites conflict among the minbari and is especially threatening to “gifted ones” who were later theorized to be the forefathers and -mothers of the current telepaths.
Really interesting legends all told. But given that Valeria so embodies values of all the three castes, though many legends have fallen out of favor, it seems odd that the minbari are divided so precisely into Three.
Warrior, Religious and Worker. Three languages. Gray council of Three times Three; Three Warriors, Three Religious caste members and Three Workers.
Just a slight obsession with number three.
Then I recalled trinity in Christianity… Another strike to the column that there is some higher being which manifests pretty similarly across species. But is it a legitimate deity or something that seems like it or manipulated our ancestors into worshiping them? I doubt I will ever know.
Additionally, the religious lessons seem to teach us about our history, traditions, culture and current society. Manners, customs, etiquette, value of honor and many other things that teach us what being a minbari means.
I think, I may have annoyed our teacher a bit too much with all of my questions… but perhaps I should start at the beginning.
We – my class our three teachers and I – were taking a field trip of sorts to the Anla'shok temple for practical observations on the running of the temple. We took a guided tour with a member of the temple’s upkeep showing us around and explaining what went on where and why. It was partially boring for thirty young minbari – we are around seven cycles at this point – that were nowhere near fully grown, yet we all tried our best to act calm and serious like all the adults around us. (I am pretty sure all adults just find it absolutely adorable, how serious we are at seeming like grown-ups though the tour could not interest us at all…)
Eventually though, our patience – If one could call it that – was rewarded and we finally saw a much more interesting part of the temple. This temple was widely famous for its old and skillfully made crystal structures and mosaics, dating back to long before Valen’s time. A very important piece of our cultural heritage as minbari living in the capital city of the planet Minbar, Yedor.
We were allowed to explore on our own in the room, of course with all warnings about touching anything reinforced with a dry announcement to us and all the other visitors – the temple is public space, and we were nowhere near the only people currently visiting – that forcefields protect all the more fragile crystal formations are active.
(I suspect they are mostly kept off to allow for unobstructed view, since the fields refract light slightly and distort the view, but they were activated for our sake, so that thirty children could run amok without the adults having to worry about priceless artifacts being broken)
The crystal walls and mosaics are tremendously beautiful, and I could see myself coming to here regularly once I was older to see them and perhaps even spend more time here relaxing, if I ended up living in Yedor once I was grown. A fact of living in a spacefaring society was that occupation could take you almost everywhere, and since I have not yet even an inkling of what I wish to do once I am grown, I could not yet know where I would end up living.
But anyways, I ended up finding an old crystal mozaic depicting Valeria divided into Three; One worker, one religious and one warrior and around them people of the three castes surrounding their corresponding Valeria with clear borders dividing the castes.
Valeria seemed to both embody and divide the three castes simultaneously and that was the basis of my questions to our tour guide and teachers. When asked, Why Three castes; why warrior, religious and worker castes; why is Three so sacred?
The teachers tried their best to respond, but in hindsight I don’t think they actually expected to debate deeply religious concepts – that are at times controversial for many top scholars of the religious caste – with a child seven cycles old. And due to receiving unsatisfying answers along the lines of, it has always been so; Valeria decreed, so it is; Ancestors observed nature and found Three in everything, I may have gotten slightly frustrated and just continuously asking questions until one of the teachers clearly ran out of patience and snapped, “understanding is not required, only obedience!”
“But I want to understand! How can I say I have learned if I do not understand?” I snapped back, completely on board with continuing the debate I had begun. I had not noticed we had attracted an audience though, and clearly neither had the teacher, as we were interrupted, “The child speaks well, as an educator your duty is to embrace and encourage the thirst for knowledge in the children under your care, not stifle it.”
The teacher immediately looked embarrassed, whether by his outburst against a child or being shamed in front of so many people by a clearly high-ranked minbari. We were actually surrounded by a rather large group of people, in addition to our class and teachers, and many of them appeared to agree with the male who interrupted us.
The male was obviously of the religious caste and of high rank as well, going by his attire. I did not recognize him, but our teachers and many surrounding visitors obviously did. I was rather surprised when the man knelt down on the ground to be closer to my height and then addressed me with a faint smile, “a rather spirited knowledge-seeker that we have here. You are confused by the concept of three. Three castes, three languages, one might even almost say three people. Is that right?”
I snapped out of my surprise and did my best to ignore the people surrounding us when I answered, “Yes, three is used everywhere. Well, except in history lessons when we discuss Valeria who embodies all three castes, but even he has three distinct aspects, one for each caste. I suppose it could have been proven to be a good choice, but it is used absolutely everywhere, and no one can tell me why, besides some variation of ‘that is how it always has been’ and I have been trying to find an explanation why! Really, at this point I would not be surprised if a triangle of any kind was thought to be the most beautiful shape of all!”
I gained momentum as I explained my problem, ending up more with a rant than a proper, rational question. I could theorize all I liked, but the lack of a straight answer was frustrating.
I could tell that the male and at this point most of the adults had indulgent smiles on their faces. They found my rant cute apparently. But despite that the male only smiled before actually answering my question seriously, “Yes three has been proven through trial and experience to be a rather good choice for making decisions. When there are three sides, no decision is made with consideration to only two points of view. If there are more sides, then decision making slows down with each new side. The Grey Council is formed of nine individuals bringing different points of view from three different perspectives that are the three castes. There are often three sides to everything: mine, yours and the truth. With three sides, two will be checking the power of the third for all sides. Our division into three sides has not always been good, however, as I am sure you know from your studies of the pre-Valen era. The introduction of the Grey council and of the Anla-Shok as an additional balancing element of no side or even a fourth side, has worked wonderfully. For a thousand years, no Minbari has killed another Minbari.”
It was rather simplified, but I suspect that had more to do with my age than the understanding the male had of the concept – and perhaps time, since I think a through explanation would have us here at least until tomorrow. Before I could dwell on his answer for long, however, he continued.
“And as for beautiful shapes, triangles are certainly my favorite,” the grinning male finished with a small joke, and I let out a small laugh as well.
“Thank you!” I smiled, “that has been bothering me for ages. I am sorry for bothering you with it. You look really busy. And well I suppose triangles are not that bad,” I said without looking at him. I was clearly embarrassed but there was one more thing I should ask, I wanted to remember who answered my question.
“I am Lian. Who are you?” I asked with a small bow.
“You are welcome, young Lian. Your question was no bother at all. It is simply a joy to see and help such an enthusiastic, young knowledge-seeker. I am Dukhat. It is very nice to meet you. I hope we meet again.” With that said the male, Dukhat tapped me gently on my head and rose.
I lifted my hands to my head and looked on in quiet awe when it registered just who had spoken to me, answered a question for me that he really did not need to. Satai Dukhat, one of the three representatives of Religious Caste in the Grey Council.
As in a Very Important Person that even I had heard about, even though I did not know what he looked like. Well at least I can be sure that he knows what he is talking about, I thought slightly hysterically.
As Dukhat walked away, his entourage with him, my classmates surrounded me. They were all in a buzz that I got to talk to Satai Dukhat. The identities of the Grey Council were mostly kept secret, but generally at least one member of each caste had their identity known to the public. It seemed to be mostly about preference, since being known as Satai brought certain amount of attention whenever their identities were known, and some preferred the peace of not being known.
Dukhat was hands down, the most popular of the currently known council members. He had increasing amount of support in all three castes and was the most likely choice for succeeding the seat of the Chosen One, once the current Chosen One died or stepped down.
So, pretty much the future leader of our people had just spoken to me and patiently answered my question even though he must be awfully busy. Usually, the grey council was based on their ship, whose name I cannot recall, and rarely come down to the planet and he had just delayed his business because of the frustrated questions of a child…
Well, I know now who I am going to vote for in the future, I suppose…?
I had just become eight cycles old when I received a scholarship to Sech'Zha Academy. Eight cycles old younglings were the youngest students accepted. I was baffled; I did not recall applying for it. I had a sneaking suspicion this had something to do with my encounter with Satai Dukhat… My parents seemed to know what was going on, so I did not make a big number of the mystery of the event. I did make a number about rejoicing and maybe bragging a bit to my classmates about making it to the first ranked academy of the religious caste.
My parents and clan were well off, but without a scholarship, the academy would be far too expensive for all but the richest of the religious caste. The entire Family of Zir was extremely proud of me.
The Sech'Zha Academy was the minbari equivalent of a boarding school, so I would be leaving and studying for a bit less than half a cycle before returning for a break of fifteen days. Not counting the holidays for the observances of religious rituals, which were quite numerous. No need to fear getting too few breaks. Rinse and repeat for the next fifteen cycles, or as long as I managed to keep my scholarship.
I couldn’t wait!