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Lilly wakes up to the smell of lavender, to soft hands curled around her waist, and a warm face buried in the crook of her neck. She wakes up with memories of the night before, memories of a long drive, late night coffee, two girls lost in conversations. Memories of a silent drive home, tender glances shared in the dim light, their hands brushing together in the dark - an unspoken knowledge lingering between them.
She doesn’t want to wake up, never wants to leave Mary. She loves their mornings together at her place. So she allows herself to shut her eyes again whilst gently stroking her fingers through Mary’s wild curls. She falls asleep to the sound of Mary’s soft hums of approval, and a glimpse of the picture of them she keeps on her bedside table.
When she eventually wakes up Mary is, very predictably, still asleep, breathing quietly against her, she truly looks adorable and Lily can’t help but smile to herself. She gently pushes Mary onto the bed, earning her a small grunt of disapproval and she smiles again.
She finally gets up and makes her way into her kitchen, she should really call it their kitchen at this point because half of the decoration, the spices, the snacks - well, they are all Mary’s. She gets started on making some french toast and tea, Mary’s favourite breakfast. Really it's Lily’s favourite too because of how much Mary loves it, the way her eyes light up when she bites into the cinnamon toast, and the way she could talk for hours about different types of tea. Lily really can't distinguish between them to be honest, well tea is tea isn't it? But she pretends to understand, really just wanting to listen to Mary, listen to her get so passionate and watch her smile as she explains each and every memory related to different ones.
Maybe one day Lily will get her own tea, get her own memory that Mary will tell to someone else. She quickly pushes away the thought because it hurts her more than she cares to admit.
About ten minutes later Mary walks into the kitchen and Lilly feels her breath hitch at the sight. She's wearing one of Lily’s t-shirts that stops half way up her thighs and Lily has to pull her eyes up, immediately feeling a blush creep up her cheeks. Her hair is wild and soft, so soft, and she wants to run her hands through it, to hold Mary close and never let go.
“Hi,” Mary says, a small, shy smile growing on her face as her hands fiddle with the hem of her shirt, raising it ever so slightly and causing Lily’s cheeks to heat even more. She was blushing so much she was pretty sure her face matched her hair at this point.
Get yourself together, Evans she thinks to herself, clearing her throat.
“I see someone decided to finally wake up.”
“Oops,” Mary replies sheepishly, a small grin appearing on her cheeks, causing her dimples to appear.
Fuck, Lily thinks, she’s so beautiful. So perfect.
“I’m just kidding,” She says, slowly approaching Mary and grabbing her hands to lead her to sit down, “I thought it would be better to let you sleep than to deal with a grumpy, sleep-deprived Mary.”
“Hey,” she protests.
“You can’t even deny it.”
“You love me anyways,” she replies without thinking. Lily’s eyes dim and she looks at the floor.
“I do,” she whispers, because she truly does. She always loves Mary.
“Lily-”
“I’m making breakfast,” she interjects abruptly, clearing her throat, but her green eyes are glistening and her heart aches. She tries to plaster on a bright smile and grin at the other girl. “It’s your favourite.”
“Thank you Lilyflower,” Mary says softly. Lily turns around and continues making another batch of the french toast to distract herself.
She’s your friend. Your best friend. And that's all she’ll ever be and that has to be enough. Don’t mess this up. She thinks to herself, hearing her mothers words in head - “it's not normal sweetheart, she’s your friend. I’m sure you will find a lovely boy, you're so pretty.” She ignores the burning feeling in her eyes. Ignore the tears.
She suddenly hears music playing quietly in the background and, before she can turn around, she feels two warm hands wrap around her waist from behind her.
She melts into the touch, into Mary’s comforting touch and leans against her, resting her head on her shoulder and staring up into her eyes. Her lovely, brown eyes - sometimes tender, but holding the capacity to light the world on fire with her passion.
It's one of the things Lily loves the most about her. Well, she loves everything about her. The one thing that never changes though is the fact that they are always Lily’s home.
She feels Mary tighten her grip on her waist and carefully spin Lilly around, coming to rest their foreheads together. Mary gently lifts Lily’s hands from her sides and lifts them to rest around her neck. She raises her own hands and places them back on her waist.
And slowly, so slowly, she starts moving them so that they are swaying, together, to the beat of the music. Lily finds herself lost in the other girl’s eyes, all coherent thoughts flying straight out of head the second their noses brush gently together. Mary releases a soft breath that Lily can feel on her lips.
She doesn’t know how long passes, it feels like hours, she's pretty sure the toast is burnt at this point, but she’s too lost in the comfort of Mary’s gaze - too distracted to care about their Sunday morning breakfast burning. So they continue dancing, round and round, in the kitchen, under the rising glow of the morning sun, and Lily can’t imagine a more perfect morning.
Mary slowly leans back and presses a soft kiss to her forehead and Lily’s eyes flutter shut. She looks down, avoiding meeting Mary’s gaze, unable to explain the emotion rising in her throat.
But the other girl brings her fingertips to Lily’s jaw, gently lifting it to meet her eyes, and Lily finds her eyes are also shining. She’s never seen Mary look so vulnerable, so young. She feels her heart ache. And then in a movement Lilly never expected Mary slowly brushed her thumb across Lily’s soft skin wiping away a tear she didn't even realise had fallen.
And that one touch.
That one small action.
One that may seem un-noticeable to others, but to Lily, to Lily - it was enough.
It said enough.
She knew.
There was no proof, not really, but she knew. All her fears, all her wildest dreams and her hopes were confirmed and, for once, she lets go of all her fears, and ghosts, and pulls Mary gently in.
She’s terrified she’ll break, terrified she’ll pull away, but she connects their lips and Mary leans into the kiss. Lily feels herself letting go of all her inhibitions - only with her. Only ever with Mary. But she makes Lily strong, makes her want to be brave. Mary pushes her fingers through Lily’s hair earning her a small sigh and she pulls her forwards, deepening the kiss.
-
After hours, well, what felt like hours, Mary pulls back and stares at Lilly. Her cheeks flushed, matching her fiery red hair, and she stares at her in disbelief. Her beautiful, green eyes are wide with shock, but she sees the affection shining brightly.
“You're my best friend,” Lily whispers, breaking the silence and looking at her with tears in her eyes, and a strange look on her face.
But Mary knows, knows what it means. She can hear it in the silence, she can see it in every conversation, every glance, every touch - she was in love with Lily Evans. If she's being honest with herself, she's loved her since the moment she locked eyes with the small girl who smiled shyly at her on the hogwart platform.
Her first friend. Her best friend, more than best friend - her everything really.
And it was truer love than she had ever felt in her life. She finally understands what James said to her, when he said he lost his mind to Regulus, how he was always ready to fight for him, and why, for once in his life, he went against his best friend, his brother - because now that she has felt this, she’s never letting go, not for anything in this world. She's spent so many years fighting these feelings, trying to figure out the right thing to say, because she thought it was wrong - but nothing has ever felt more right.
Why didn't they do this before?
Suddenly, she's pulled from her thoughts as she hears Lilly clear her throat, looking up at her. “I love you," she breathes out quietly and lily stares back at her, eyes wide with shock, yet glistening with unshed tears.
“You love me?”
“Of course,” she says fondly, “ I've been in love with you for the last five years and I'm very madly in love with you now, if I hadn't made it clear enough already. I somehow always manage to turn into a fumbling idiot around you. You make me lose sight of everything except you.”
“You’ve really loved me this entire time?”
“When we were 15, I told you you were the prettiest girl i'd ever seen, who says that platonically? How did you not get the hint idiot,” she chokes out, words laced with nothing but affection.
Lily's eyes widen in realisation and Mary just wants to kiss the stupid expression off her face - and then, she realises she can. And that realisation shocks her, and does unspeakable things to her heart. She would like to say she's usually not this soft, but when it comes to Lily Evans, well, she will always be Mary’s exception.
She rushes forwards and grabs - a very surprised but unprotesting - Lily, bringing her into a soft kiss. She feels her initial shock fading as she melts into her, every curve fitting perfectly together, as if she was always meant to be held by Mary.
She feels Lily slowly pull back, resting their foreheads together and trailing her thumb across her cheek. She stares straight into her beautiful, soft green eyes and leans back in to press tender kisses to every one of Lilly's freckles. She wants to map them out - every single one - and engrave them into her memory forever. Forever. It shocks her initially, she always known she loved Lily, but forever - that's a long time.
She should have really seen it coming. Lily Evans was a fucking force. Once she was in your life, she would never leave, not that anyone would ever want her to leave, because being loved by her was a privilege, and one that most people couldn't claim. They didn't even know what they were missing out on, that they were missing out on the fircest, most loyal, love they would ever feel, and Mary has never felt so lucky to have found her.
Lily smiles softly and brushes their noses together. “I love you too,” she finally says.
“Forever?” Mary asks her.
“Forever sweetheart,” she whispers back.