Chapter Text
Ahhh sweet peace. Being in the private comfort of ones own office really is one of life's greatest gifts. At least, Tang thinks so. Setting down his glasses and bringing a cup of tea to his face, he takes in a deep breathe before sighing contently at the aroma of the drink. He takes a sip and focuses on the warm taste, surely this moment was absolutely perf-
"Tang?" . . . Ah shit. Extra eyes and limbs aren't a good look for a supposedly 'human' scholar are they?
Let's go back to see how exactly he got into this situation shall we?
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It'd been several years since Tang had first started hanging out with the gang. At first he only came to the surface in disguise so he could get a bite of Pigsy's noodles, eventually becoming good friends with the owner and then a (freeloading) regular. Things had gotten even more lively once MK came into the picture, and later Mei. He'd gotten comfy with the new group he found himself spending more and more time with. Though at the end of the day, he'd leave the return the the welcoming familiarity of the sewers, and more specifically, the lost remains of the Spider Kingdom. Once he sits on one of the stones, he lets out a sigh as his glamour fades, revealing his unnaturally purple skin, extra pairs or not brown, but green eyes, sharp fangs, and extra limbs. After taking a moment of rest he wanders farther into the cave system, looking for some specific friends of his.
"Whatcha got there huh Tang?"
"GAH!!" Tang exclaimed upon hearing the sudden voice behind him. "Don't sneak up on my like that Queen!!! My damn heart-" He says, placing a hand over his heart and gasps dramatically.
"Mmmhmm, cool the theatrics theatre kid and hand over the goods." The new voice, Spider Queen, said with an amused smile.
"Looks like I was caught." he says with a chuckle while opening a bag of fast food and handing over a bowl of noodles to Spider Queen, "Enjoy them! I swear you can't find better noodles anywhere else hahah."
Spider Queen didn't seem to pay attention as she immediately started to devour the noodles, Tang knew she wouldn't hear anything while in that own personal heaven of hers so he continues to walk until he comes across two Spider demons playing checkers, with one of them seeming very frustrated at the fact he was losing.
"How?!!?" Huntsman exclaimed as goliath claimed yet another victory, "You didn't even know how to play till 20 minutes ago!!"
"Maybe I'm just lucky!" Goliath said with a taunting smile, very amused at the smaller spiders reaction.
"Lucky my ass, you won't feel so lucky when I shove MY FOOT UP YOUR-" Huntsman's threat gets cut off by the sounds of laughter.
"Hahahah- girls girls you're both pretty princesses, now quite fighting and enjoy some noodles! I even got some of the Xiao Long Bao for you two." He says as he hands over a takeout bag, which Huntsman promptly snatches from the others hands.
"Thanks for that. . AND DON'T CALL US PRINCESSES!!" He snaps as he starts digging into the noodles.
"Thanks Tang!" Goliath says as he cracks open a fortune cookie, "Oooo, 'A new friend will join your ranks' wonder what that could mean!" he exclaims with a smile.
Tang just shrugs, "No way I would know." With that, he heads to his 'room', if it can be considered that. He knows SQ is trying her hardest to return them all to greatness, but a dingy mattress in a cave still aren't ideal circumstances. Still, he lays his head down and sighs, opening up one of his books and preparing a lesson plan for the next day. Despite being a disguised demon, he decided to hold a job as a teacher so he can take care of groceries for everyone. He doesn't want food being a burden on Spider Queen too. He continues to read and plan late into the night, it's only at 2:13 am that he decides he's satisfied with the lesson plan and sets everything down. As he rests his head, his mind wanders, thinking about what tomorrow will bring. Though he only has a minute or so to mull over the thoughts before his eyes shut and peaceful sleep takes him.
~~Timeskip~~
Oh no, oh no no no this was very bad. Very very bad. MK WAS WUKONGS SUCCESSOR?!!?? This wouldn't turn out good. Of course the horror he felt inwardly wasn't on display, instead expressing his strong emotions under the guise of excitement and fanboy-ness. When Tang had sat down for his usual order at Pigsy's, he didn't expect MK to rush in carrying the Monkey Kings staff and ranting about how the Demon Bull King was on a rampage, yet here he was, staff in hand, and very clearly frazzled over the events. That's ok though, it's fiiiiine, everything is fiiiiiine, they can handle this, nothing bad will happen.
~~a few hours later~~
Everything bad happened.
Tang didn't even know how fast it happened, mind a whirlwind of barely coherent thoughts the entire time as the big blue guy, Sandy, as Pigsy had called him, was sailing them towards Flower Fruits mountain, and even worse was the hollow pain in his chest when Pigsy and Mei had returned. . . without MK in tow. And even now they face the destruction of the city at Demon Bull Kings hands. Oh god what will happen now, he can't protect them, or the spiders, he couldn't even protect MK. . .
~~Timeskip~~
Somehow, in the end, everything had worked out. MK had miraculously returned and stolen the staff back from the Demon Bull King and stopped the wanton destruction of Megopolis. Several weeks had passed and Tang now found himself at a farmers marking, following in a sluggish manner as Pigsy rushed excitedly from stall to stall, on the hunt for only the best produce. It made Tang smile seeing how excited Pigsy was, even if he wasn't a morning person, he'd rather be here seeing Pigsy happy than to be catching up on sleep.
"Looks the same as the last 20,000 carrots we've looked at." Tang says as he holds the carrot Pigsy was just showing him.
"Gimme that!" Pigsy says, snatching the carrot back. "I wouldn't expect you to appreciate a fine carrot like this!" He continues dramatically. "You ain't no culinary genius hahah, like me!"
Tang can't help but find the scene endearing, he'd always admired the chef's passion for his trade. He stiffens up though, once he hears a familiar voice chuckle from the darkness.
"My my my~ You boys are making quite a scene!" A woman says with a giggle as she steps out of the shadow. "Looking to buy some ingredients? Something, tasty~? You've come to the right place~" She says while blowing a kiss towards the two.
'Spider Queen!' Tangs mind exclaims, 'This isn't good, she'll blow my cover!' "Uhhhhh oh-! Uh, c'mon Pigsy, let's just keep going. . . wha?" He says, gesturing away from the stall, only to turn and see Pigsy is no longer beside him and instead standing at the stall.
"Ahahah, yo-you are selling beautiful vegetables today?" The pig demon says with a nervous smile on his face.
Tang looks over the bare scraps of produce in the stall and can only say, "Are you blind??" as he shoots a glare towards SQ, warning her of how easily this could go wrong. He also can't help the twinge at his heart when he realizes how effective the flirting was on the other. Right. . Pigsy only had eyes for women.
"That's right sugar~ This, is the finest store in the whole market! Why don't you come around back and, look at my exclusive wares~" She says, beckoning Tang and Pigsy towards the back of her stall.
Tang grabs onto Pigsy's wrist as the demon tries to follow the woman, "Pigsy, I'm not sure this is such a-" He's cut off by Pigsy saying, "Don't wreck this for me! I need this."
With a disheartened sigh, Tang follows Pigsy, all the while Spider Queen says "A little closer~ A liiiittle closer~"
Suddenly, a cracking sound is heard and the floor falls through, the two scream in fear while SQ laughs maliciously, closing the hatch door above them both.
~~Timeskip~~
They'd been wrapped and stuck in the web for several hours now much to Tangs disappointment. On the plus side however, Spider Queen made no indication that she knew Tang, and Tang acted the same in turn, meaning Pigsy wouldn't get tipped off. They remained there for a few more hours until MK arrived and had successfully defeated the Spider Queen, (Tang would be sure to get her extra noodles as an apology,) and they all escaped.
~~Timeskip (god there are so many of these I'm sorry-)~~
The new years celebration was commencing, just earlier Tang had been researching the latest plan with Syntax, their newest recruit, and now he was playing undercover with the rest of the MK gang (minus MK) when the large spider float had appeared. This entire fiasco led to Tang acting like your average frightened citizen, getting dragged to the celestial realm, almost dragging Huntsman to hell on accident (that's more apology noodles on his tab), and putting the Spider Queens plans to a stop. Though he wasn't glad of the plans failure, he was glad it bought them more time. Since the arrival of this new (and frankly creepy girl-), Tang had been on edge, whatever she was planning with SQ was bigger than he or any of the spiders could fully grasp. He'd have to warn everyone else of his suspicions later, should all go well, then they should all be able to escape the girls grasp.
~~Timeskip~~
It worked. They managed to run away and thank goodness for that. It was most likely pure luck that he managed to convince them all to abandon the plan with him, (not without a large argument with Spider Queen that eventually ended in a hurtful realization of what this plan holds for them), but they did it. Now they could all live as normally as possible. With the other three crashing at his recently bought apartment, Tang found himself at his office more and more, usually with a tea cup in hand. It was a comfortable habit he'd grown into, repeating it day after day. All was well, until one day, a certain group had walked in on him.
And now they're back to here.
~~Back to present~~
"ahahah. . . anyone want some tea-?"