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Bouncing from foot to foot, Cheng Xiaoshi smiled at a cardboard box that took up a sizable chunk of the living room space. It was here. He’d worked hard, saved up for quite a while and it was finally here.
Cheng Xiaoshi loved their little place, and not only because of the distant memories or the impossible hope it was filled with. He loved how sun or moonlight illuminated the room through the glass wall and ceiling when he worked or rested on the couch with Lu Guang. He loved every almost randomly placed plant that livened up the space. Loved every frame on the wall that captured fleeting moments of life, grand or insignificant, but all real, human. It always felt like their place was alive in a way.
It was functional too, they managed to fit every basic appliance needed for a comfortable life. Except for one. They didn’t own a TV. Qiao Ling had one at her place and watched her dramas with Shanshan, Cheng Xiaoshi caught up on his favorites on his laptop and Lu Guang, always glued to a book, wasn’t a big fan of movies or shows anyway. Getting a TV didn’t cross anyone’s mind much.
Still, Cheng Xiaoshi thought it was unfair that the three of them couldn’t share a nice movie night together. Buttery smell of phantom homemade popcorn his mother used to make filled his nose. He couldn’t find the exact seeds, but he did go a little overboard with multiple flavors he found. Today was going to be great. To get everything ready, he purposefully made everyone leave and threatened to smite anyone who dared to show up before six. Accepting yet another Cheng Xiaoshi’s quirk, Qiao Ling and Lu Guang didn’t argue.
The TV Cheng Xiaoshi bought wasn’t anything fancy, not one of those 8K, overly bright and ridiculously expensive models that made reality look dull in comparison, but it was decent. Perhaps next time he could save up for speakers to make the experience even better. If Lu Guang didn’t kill him for the first purchase. Cheng Xiaoshi didn’t like hiding things, even minor ones, from Lu Guang, but he would make up for it with the good time they were about to have.
“Ta-da!” He greeted his friends when everything was unpacked and set up, and the coffee table was piled with snacks and drinks.
“What is this?” Qiao Ling cried out.
“Shush! Don’t mention my debt. We’re having a movie night. Fun is obligatory!”
“That’s why you were acting weird and fidgety lately.” Lu Guang sighed.
“I was not acting weird!” Cheng Xiaoshi faked offense. Of course, he noticed. Lu Guang always noticed his feelings and moods.
“So, what are we watching?” Qiao Ling asked, munching on caramel popcorn. “We could all use some fun, I guess.”
“Lord of the Rings marathon. It’s a blockbuster.” Cheng Xiaoshi nodded at Qiao Ling. “And it's a book.” Another nod at Lu Guang. “Am I the best at choosing or what?”
“Fine. It’s not such a bad idea.” Lu Guang shrugged to Cheng Xiaoshi’s joy.
“Let’s begin then.” Cheng Xiaoshi beamed.
Around midnight, at the end of the battle of Helm’s Deep, Qiao Ling gave out a long yawn. “I don’t think I can make another movie. Cheng Xiaoshi, thank you. I admit it was a good idea.” She pinched his cheek and smiled.
“See? I know how to have fun, don’t I?” He smiled back proudly. “Lu Guang, are you tired too?” Cheng Xiaoshi pouted when Qiao Ling left. The bluish glow of the screen in the half-dark room, his friends by his side made him calm and peaceful. He didn’t want the night to end.
“I’m okay.” Lu Guang shook his head. “You said it’s a marathon.”
Overjoyed, Cheng Xiaoshi jumped up and turned on the final part.
Not even half an hour into the movie, he frowned and shifted, wiggling his stiff shoulders. “Maybe I should save up for a better couch next.”
“The couch is fine. You just need a stretch, that's all.” Lu Guang put a hand on his back and stroked up and down. His hand was warm and pleasantly heavy, so Cheng Xiaoshi leaned into the touch like a dog into a pet. Focused on the movie, Lu Guang kept mindlessly caressing his back and sides, massaging his shoulders one at a time, lightly scratching his skin and then smoothing over it. He was right, that was exactly what Cheng Xiaoshi needed. He smiled and hummed contentedly. At some point his T-shirt slipped up and he shivered at the bare skin contact but moved closer.
Cheng Xiaoshi wasn't exactly touchy and cuddly. Not when he spent so much time in other people's bodies. Physical contact felt weird, borderline inappropriate and wrong. He still winced thinking about the attempts of Emma’s boss to touch her. But he was himself right now and this was Lu Guang. Kind, familiar, safe Lu Guang. Cheng Xiaoshi blinked and realized he'd moved so close he almost rested against Lu Guang's chest, whose arm was now wrapped around his waist. Without thinking too much he twisted his legs under him and let himself wrap around him in return.
“This is so nice,” he murmured as Lu Guang drew him closer, caressing naked skin. Lu Guang smelled like fresh night air. The rise and fall of his chest swayed Cheng Xiaoshi like a gentle rocking of a cradle. Why hadn’t they done this before? He’d never felt more comfortable. Cheng Xiaoshi moaned when Lu Guang squeezed his shoulders, moved a hand up and ran his fingers through his hair, lightly scratching the scalp. He stared at the TV with unseeing eyes, enjoying the serenity Lu Guang’s embrace brought. This was what home felt like, Cheng Xiaoshi thought as he drifted on and off a blissful state.
“Cheng Xiaoshi,” he heard a distant whisper. “Cheng Xiaoshi, you need to go to bed.”
“But I like it here.” Cheng Xiaoshi mumbled and clung tighter, not willing to let go.
“We can't sleep like this, now your back will surely hurt.” Cheng Xiaoshi was lifted off the couch. He held onto something to keep balance when consciousness kicked back in. Lu Guang carried him in his arms and moved towards the stairs.
“I can walk. I can walk.” He panicked for a moment.
Lu Guang put him back on the floor but held out a hand. “Let’s go.” Cheng Xiaoshi laced their fingers together and didn't let go until he was in bed.
“Good night, Cheng Xiaoshi.” Lu Guang covered him with a comforter and disappeared into the top bunk.
The usually soft and warm comforter didn’t feel cozy tonight. His bed never felt this empty and cold before. Cheng Xiaoshi tossed and turned, wide awake. He needed Lu Guang’s hands on him again. He couldn’t ask him for that. Could he?
After a pathetically short battle with common sense, Cheng Xiaoshi climbed out of bed.
“Are you okay?” Lu Guang immediately sat up, his concerned face exquisite in the dim moonlight. Cheng Xiaoshi had eyes, he knew how handsome Lu Guang was but only now did he notice how delicate his beauty was. He wanted to press his fingertips against the luminous skin and study the soft lines. He wanted Lu Guang to press his fingertips against his face, his body. Wanted him to hug him and never let go.
“I'm…” Cheng Xiaoshi stuttered, watching him. “I want to have sex with you.” He didn't come up with anything better than that. That would be less embarrassing than to ask for cuddles. It was less embarrassing to be nothing more than a horny young man than a sappy, touch-starved loser.
A moment of silence. Lu Guang’s face is impenetrable, and what he asked for sank in. Icy terror twisted Cheng Xiaoshi’s guts. He ruined everything. Lu Guang would never touch him again in any way. He would move out and never guide him in a dive. Cheng Xiaoshi would never hear his smooth and steady voice inside his head. He would never–
“Let’s do it in your bunk.” Lu Guang started to climb down, calm as ever. What a man of mystery.
It was too late to think straight so Cheng Xiaoshi silently got back under the sheets. His heart skipped a beat when Lu Guang joined him and tightly pressed himself against his back. Cheng Xiaoshi’s treacherous body melted. Would he even be able to sleep alone ever again?
“Do you really want this?” Lu Guang whispered against the back of his neck as his hand slowly slipped under Cheng Xiaoshi’s T-shirt. He could say no, confess he wanted to be held and soothed. Lu Guang would understand. Perhaps, he would even grant his wish. But as hot skin brushed against his stomach, chest, his nipple, drawing circles around it, a spark kindled inside. His guts twisted once again, this time the knot dangerously hot.
“Yes.” Cheng Xiaoshi breathed out, pushing away the realization of how deeply he meant it.
“Then let me take care of you.” Lu Guang pressed his lips against the bare patch of skin above his T-shirt. “Take this off.”
Cheng Xiaoshi complied, missing the heat even in the mere seconds it took him to pull away and undress. He arched his back when Lu Guang planted kisses on his naked shoulder and back, caressing his chest, pinching the nipples. Cheng Xiaoshi sucked in a breath.
“You’re sensitive. I like it.” Lu Guang’s hoarse voice sent electric sparks down his spine. “I like your body. How responsive it is.”
Lu Guang’s hand slid lower, cupping over his pants. Cheng Xiaoshi would be embarrassed how turned on he was from the slightest touch, but his cravings took over and he moaned helplessly.
“Don’t worry, everything will be okay. I'm here for you.” His hand made its way into the pants and the underwear. Cheng Xiaoshi whimpered and bit his lip to stifle more embarrassing sounds threatening to come out.
“I love how hot and smooth your cock feels in my hand.” Lu Guang stroked his length, pausing to tease the tip. “It's so heavy. I bet it’s beautiful.” He added diligent bites along the exposed skin, licking up the traces. “Cheng Xiaoshi, do you know how beautiful you are?”
Cheng Xiaoshi trembled, unsure if it was the touch or the words. Everything Lu Guang did sent him reeling.
“I love your hair. I love how wild it is. Do you know what your ponytail does to me?” Relentless strokes and kisses and bites overtook him. Cheng Xiaoshi whined audibly.
“Good. You're so good, Cheng Xiaoshi.”
It felt good, Cheng Xiaoshi wanted to reply. Lu Guang was so good. Amazing. So amazing it was unfair. A pinch of rationality crawled back into his melted mind.
Cheng Xiaoshi turned around and reached out for Lu Guang. He needed to repay him, make him feel as good. He grabbed his hard cock. Fuck, Lu Guang was hard because he touched Cheng Xiaoshi. Cheng Xiaoshi’s head was spinning. Did they have alcohol, maybe he forgot how he got drunk. But it was just boba tea. Something else made him feel drunk. Someone else. He held onto that person.
“It’s okay.” Lu Guang gently pushed his hand away. Selfless dummy.
When Cheng Xiaoshi looked up, Lu Guang’s eyes were glowing, not the eerie blue of his powers, it was the soft gray radiance of his best friend. The closest person he had in his life. The one who was always there to care for him.
Lu Guang smiled reassuringly and brushed a wild strand of hair away from his eyes. Cheng Xiaoshi lost it. He reached out and covered his mouth with his own. Lu Guang froze for a moment but as he continued kissing, tasting his lips, drinking him in, he opened up with a soft groan. Breaking the contact for the longest couple of seconds, Cheng Xiaoshi got rid of the rest of his clothes. He straddled Lu Guang and devoured his sweet mouth. More electricity went down his spine at the touch of their tongues. No, Lu Guang didn’t make him feel drunk, he made him high, and Cheng Xiaoshi knew he was addicted once and for all.
Lu Guang grabbed his ass with one hand and slipped another between their bodies to stroke Cheng Xiaoshi’s leaking cock. The angle was awkward but with Lu Guang’s lips, his hands on him, his dizzying scent around, Cheng Xiaoshi came, writhing and moaning into the kiss.
“Good boy. Such a good boy, Cheng Xiaoshi.” He heard through the daze before falling on top of Lu Guang, without any care if he was crushing him. He breathed hard into the crook of his neck as Lu Guang stroked his back.
“Lu Guang…” Cheng Xiaoshi whispered when he came down, fearful to break the brittle intimacy but unable to hold himself back.
Lu Guang gently flipped him over, placed back on the bed and, leaving no time to worry if everything was over, captured his mouth in a tender kiss. He kissed him carefully but thoroughly like Cheng Xiaoshi was one of those precious cameras he knew exactly how to fix.
After a torturously long and sweet kiss Lu Guang tucked them into the comforter. He pulled Cheng Xiaoshi to his chest and stroked his hair. Legs tangled, they lay there without saying a word. Cheng Xiaoshi expected to drift off again, but sleep didn’t come, replaced with the urge to take in every moment of Lu Guang close to him. He breathed in the freshness of his skin and kissed his collarbone, then the place where his neck met the shoulder, the soft place behind his ear.
Lu Guang’s hands came to life again. He gave him now familiar strokes down his back, going lower and lower until he grabbed and kneaded Cheng Xiaoshi’s ass. Cheng Xiaoshi twitched and rubbed his hardening cock against Lu Guang’s leg. Heady thrill filled him, and his body tingled when a finger slid between his cheeks and circled his hole.
“Is this okay?” Lu Guang’s voice was lower than he’d ever heard.
“Yes. Please keep going.” Cheng Xiaoshi pleaded.
Lu Guang made a rough voice in the back of his throat and kept rubbing. “Your skin is so soft. You feel so good everywhere, Cheng Xiaoshi. Every part of you is perfect.”
Cheng Xiaoshi wasn't anywhere near being vain but the words coming out of Lu Guang's mouth echoed inside and sated his soulful hunger.
His body was ravenous though. He whined in disappointment when the skilled finger left him. Then he looked up and saw Lu Guang putting it into his mouth and sucking on it. Cheng Xiaoshi’s breath caught, and his cock throbbed, painfully hard.
“Will you let me please you?” Lu Guang asked, piercing him with a fiery gaze. Cheng Xiaoshi nodded passionately, unable to produce human words.
He shuddered when a wet finger slipped inside.
“Relax, let me in. Let me give you the pleasure you deserve. You deserve all the pleasures in the world, Cheng Xiaoshi.” Lu Guang crooked his finger and not a spark, but an intense electric shock traveled through Cheng Xiaoshi’s whole body. He yelped.
“See? Your responsive body again.” He moved in and out, teasingly brushing against the sensitive spot, making Cheng Xiaoshi jolt every time. “Your body is so smart. Is that why you’re so good at basketball? I love how focused on the game you are. Like nothing else exists. You were so beautiful when we met in that court. I felt so honored when you let me into your life. Do you remember what you said to me back then? How every pass represented your trust in me? How precious it was to be with a trustworthy partner? I want you to know you can always trust in me.”
Cheng Xiaoshi’s heart leapt forward. The unbearable pleasure found its way into his chest and exploded like a firework. At the same time Lu Guang started massaging the spot earnestly. Cheng Xiaoshi all but wailed. Astonished by his own reaction, he covered his mouth with a hand, watching Lu Guang with wide eyes.
“Don’t hold yourself back. The sounds you’re making are beautiful.” Stabbing him with ecstasy from the inside, Lu Guang shifted and wrapped a hand around his shaft, twisting around it, thumbing the swollen wet head, wringing out little sobs from Cheng Xiaoshi. “All sounds you make are beautiful. I love hearing your laughter. I wish I could make you laugh more and forget all your troubles.”
Cheng Xiaoshi dug his nails into Lu Guang’s side. His body was aflame, his heart was bursting.
“Let yourself enjoy it. You deserve this. I wish I could make you never feel pain. I wish I could make your life a bliss.”
Lu Guang was working him hard and fast and so, so well. Like he knew his body better than he did. Cheng Xiaoshi was falling into the delightful unknown. A little more and he would dissolve in the tantalizing abyss.
“Let go. You deserve this. You deserve to be loved, Cheng Xiaoshi. And I love your big pure heart, Cheng Xiaoshi. I love–”
Cheng Xiaoshi came a second time, spilling in long violent bursts. A full-body wave of pleasure washed over him, kicking out of the existing time and space. He vaguely registered how he convulsed and screamed out, but it didn’t matter. He was floating in the blissful state Lu Guang gifted him.
Lu Guang. Cheng Xiaoshi wanted to say but he let the void absorb him.
Bright afternoon sun greeted Cheng Xiaoshi. He squinted. Last night he went to bed late and slept in.
Last night.
He groaned into the pillow. Things went the way he hadn’t expected. Cheng Xiaoshi hadn’t ever considered they could even go that way. Hadn’t thought Lu Guang could say the words he said. Did he even mean it? Was it the heat of the late-night moment? A temporary delusion? An act of charity? The thought hurt. Yet if Lu Guang meant everything, what did that make them? Cheng Xiaoshi’s head was buzzing.
Lu Guang was brewing tea when Cheng Xiaoshi came downstairs. “So, last night was fun.” He put on his usual careless grin.
“Mn.” Lu Guang nodded. “I left some baozi for you.”
Cheng Xiaoshi ate breakfast and desperately stared at the door. Where was Qiao Ling with her jobs when he needed her? He could drown himself in someone else’s concerns and forget the mess he’d made for 12 hours. Sure, there was a chance his head would blow up with conflicting emotions but with his death the need to resolve the situation would go.
“Any plans for the weekend?”
Lu Guang shook his head.
“Another movie night?” Come on, Lu Guang, help me out here. Cheng Xiaoshi begged.
“I don’t see why not.” Lu Guang said plainly. “We could start another marathon right now.”
“Cool! I’ll get the snacks.” Cheng Xiaoshi cheered.
Cheng Xiaoshi had no idea what they were watching. The plot slipped away every time he caught a glance of Lu Guang’s face. Beautiful he was in the moonlight, daylight suited him no less. He studied the curve of his lips. Lips he could still feel pressed against his skin, could taste–
“Shall we watch something else?” Lu Guang asked without turning to face Cheng Xiaoshi.
“What? Why?”
“You’re not watching. Are you bored?”
Blood rushed to Cheng Xiaoshi’s face. “I’m fine. Never been more intrigued.”
Cheng Xiaoshi’s skin flared when Lu Guang’s attentive eyes finally studied him. He needed to say something, but his usual eloquence was gone.
“Come here.” Lu Guang beckoned. Cheng Xiaoshi’s limbs trembled treacherously as he moved closer. Lu Guang’s hand went straight under his T-shirt and touched his back in confident strokes. “Better?”
Cheng Xiaoshi moaned. Whatever Lu Guang was asking about, he was better. He was perfect.
“Lu Guang, I must ask.” He plucked up the courage at the end of the unidentified movie. “What are we?”
Lu Guang’s hands left him, but a glowing gaze kept caressing. “What do you want us to be?”
“Don’t answer with a question. Lu Guang, I really need to know. Did you mean the things you said yesterday?”
“I don’t say things I don’t mean.”
“So that means–” Cheng Xiaoshi felt silly running circles, but his heart leapt forward in hope.
“That means I like you, Cheng Xiaoshi.”
“As…?”
“I like you as a friend. As a partner. As a man. As a person I’d love to be closer with. If you were willing.”
Cheng Xiaoshi’s heart performed a small acrobatic trick. “Lu Guang, you silly boy.” He smiled. “Do you have any idea how willing I am?”
A smile lit up Lu Guang’s face and Cheng Xiaoshi made a mental note to find more ways to make it happen again. In one inelegant motion, he threw himself onto Lu Guang and wrapped his hands around his neck. Laughter broke free of his chest as it bloomed with a wonderful aching feeling.
Lu Guang grabbed his legs and pulled Cheng Xiaoshi until he was fully straddling his lap. They smiled at each other before Lu Guang cupped Cheng Xiaoshi’s cheek and kissed him softly. Cheng Xiaoshi dove into it with all his pent-up affection.
“Wait, what time is it?” He pulled away minutes, hours or maybe days later. “I need to take a picture.”
“Why?” Lu Guang asked, flushed and woozy, and gorgeous.
“To relive yesterday’s thing, of course!”
“No need.” Lu Guang’s fingertips brushed Cheng Xiaoshi’s wet swollen lips.
“Yeah, yeah, I know. You and rules, Lu Guang.” Cheng Xiaoshi rolled his eyes.
“No need to take a picture. I can give you whatever you wish for. Any time you want.” Lu Guang looked serious. Promising.
“What if I ask you to rub my back every time we watch TV?”
“I said whatever you wish for.”
“Lu Guang… You…” Cheng Xiaoshi pulled him back into the kiss, smiling into it. Buying a TV was the best idea ever.