Archive of Our Own ^beta

It’s not like Katsuki couldn’t put an All Might themed band aid on his scraped knees, in fact he could definitely do it himself. Probably better than that dweeb Deku could ever do, but despite him being a whiny crybaby, it was still better than patching himself up alone. He tried it once, contorting his arms to attempt reaching his rubbed raw elbows with specks of dirt within the blood before slapping the bandaid’s sticky side right on the wound accidentally. He nearly started to sob, ripping it off to reposition it back onto his elbow, a few tears leaking down his dirty cheeks after picking a fight with some older kids on the playground.

After that, he reluctantly allowed stupid Deku to delicately place his prized All Might bandaids on his wounds like they was made of gold. It was a necessary evil, and despite Deku being a thorn in his side, being alone as a kid wasn’t as fun as he originally assumed. Don’t get him wrong, Katsuki has the makings of the best hero ever, he doesn’t need anyone to help him. But every so often he thinks being a hero would be a little bit better if Deku was next to him gingerly holding All Might bandaids at the ready. 

He never sought out Deku when he got hurt since he was just always there somewhere in the background or right next to him with cuts of his own, Deku always offered and he’d snark back something that was never an overt refusal. He certainly never said thank you, but his accomplice didn’t mention it ever. 

They’d just sit in silence on the floor of Katsuki's bathroom with the wet rag used to wipe off the blood and dirt lying between them while Deku breathes quietly, tongue sticking out of his lips in concentration while he lays the bandaid on Katsuki's knee. It’s not an All Might themed one this time, which makes Katsuki pout, but the cut is bigger than what the All Might bandaids can handle so he reluctantly stays quiet while the bandage goes on. 

Something different happens this time though. After smoothing his chubby fingers along the edges of the bandaid, Deku leans down and places a quick kiss to his knee before moving to put the first aid kit back in the cupboard beneath the sink. It’s as if the peck sent a shock up Katsuki's spine making him a human live wire. He doesn’t move a single muscle in his body until he hears Deku's voice. 

“Kacchan? Is everything okay?” he asks, bending down closer to him with his wide puppy dog eyes.

He jerks at the interruption, glaring up at Deku. “The hell did you just do to me?” 

Deku's brows furrowed in confusion, as if it was ludicrous that Katsuki was questioning why he decided to kiss his wound. “What do you mean Kacchan? My mom does it every time she patches me up! I asked her last time why she did it and she said it makes your cuts heal faster! So now on I gotta kiss Kacchan's band aids so we can play sooner together!” His eyes crinkle at the edges as he smiles, moving towards the door to leave the bathroom. 

“W-what?! That’s not true! How could a kiss heal a cut like this?!” Katsuki retorts, scrambling to catch up to Deku in the hallway. 

“I dunno Kacchan, my mom said it so it’s obviously true,” he shrugs, moving to put on his little red sneakers and yellow jacket that was left on the coat hanger near the front door. “Besides, I always feel better when she does it.”

Katsuki schools his face into a scowl, what right did Deku have to do that to him huh? Hiding his secret formula for healing like some kind of hoarding gremlin. He wouldn’t say he felt better after the kiss, more like his heart was pounding and he felt a bit sick in his stomach, but he was certainly distracted from his knee wound by the kiss. He resigns to just grunting, the closest Deku is going to get in terms of saying that he was relatively fine with the kiss on his knee. 

“Alrighty Kacchan, see you tomorrow?” Deku asks, his doe eyes glistening in hope.

“Yeah, Yeah we can go down to the park and go to the jungle gym,” Katsuki relents, acting as if Deku’s presence at his playdates were a nuisance. 

“Okay Kacchan! See you then!” Deku exclaims, running out of Katsuki's house and back to his own down the street.

It happened again a few days later when Katsuki had a scrape on the lower part of his palm and on his elbow from falling onto the gravel while running too fast. It was terribly embarrassing and his ears were nearly steaming but all Deku did was tug on his wrist and offer his new batch of All Might bandaids for his elbow wound. His small chubby fingers flattened the bandaid on his elbow, chattering about the new design on the bandaid, but all Katsuki could focus on was the pounding of his heartbeat and the blood rushing through his head. He’s on an edge of a cliff, waiting impatiently for Deku to either piss off or kiss his elbow before leaving him the hell alone. Just thinking about Deku kissing his band aid made his palms sweat and breathing quicken; it was annoying the hell out of him. He zoned out for so long that he didn’t even notice Deku finished putting on the bandaid before pecking it before going for the palm scrape.

Katsuki jumped, yanking his hand from Deku's grasp. “I can do this one by myself!”

Green eyebrows furrow and his eyes fill with worry. “Okay Kacchan, is something wrong? Your face is all red.”

“N-no! I just don’t need you to play doctor for me every time we get hurt!” Katsuki grumbles, wiping the dirt off of his palm wound.

“You know I don’t mind helping you Kacchan, will you at least let me kiss the band aid then? I don’t want your cut to take longer to get better so we can go play again soon,” Deku says, attempting to find a happy medium between them. It doesn’t happen much.

“I don’t need your nerd kisses Deku, my cut will heal fast enough!” Katsuki retorts, scowling at his companion. 

Deku pouts in response but stays quiet, watching Katsuki finish putting the bandaid on his hand. Before Katsuki can even comprehend what's happening, Deku grabs his wrist and slams a sloppy kiss on the blue bandaid. Angry screeching fills the bathroom and trails down the hallway as Katsuki chases after Deku. 

“I’ll kill you! I don’t need your stupid kisses! I can heal all by myself!” He shrieks, sprinting down the stairs where Deku ran down. 

“You’re welcome Kacchan!” Deku giggles, snatching his shoes and not bothering to put them on before booking it out the door.

Every single time after that Deku attempts to get a small peck on Katsuki's cuts while they’re patching each other up. Sometimes he wins and sometimes Katsuki manages to push his face away and onto the floor, but he still tries to help him heal better with those dumb kisses. As they grow older, the time between playing and scuffing up their knees becomes more sparse. Eventually, it’s only Deku who gets hurt and Katsuki is left without any cuts on his arms or legs. They don’t hole up in Katsuki's bathroom nor does Deku share his new set of All Might bandaids that he found while shopping with his mom. Most of all, the kisses that Deku insists have special healing properties never again brush against Katsuki's bruised and bloody body.

Katsuki isn’t reminded of the way Izuku would kiss his wounds until years later during their time at UA. It was a normal day after training relentlessly with back to back 1v1 spars. Katsuki had gotten the shit beat out of him by Todoroki and managed to drain a lot of his sweat while trying to bust through Kirishima's hardened exterior. Jacket tied around his waist and water bottle in hand, he proceeded to leave the spar area, spotting Iida and Izuku hunkered on a bench in the back of the locker room when he entered. Most of the other boys in 1A are either changing or showering, but Izuku and Iida stay towards the back end of the locker aisle, Izuku wrapping a forearm wound on Iida. Giving them one last glance and a sneer, Katsuki walks towards the shower area where Kirishima and Kaminari fucked off to a few minutes ago. 

He really thought it would just be a typical shower and change routine like it always has, but karma was slowly creeping up on him it seems. He was ignoring Kirishima and Kaminari yapping as usual, periodically glancing at Izuku taping up the bandages on Iida's arms. He had only just come back from the shower and was about to put his phone down and slip on his undershirt when he heard Iida yell, voice at least an octave higher than normal.

“M-Midoriya-kun! Why do you always do that after…after patching me up?” Iida stutters. 

Izuku just looks up, confused. “Do what?”

“...Kiss my bandages?” Iida says, attempting to be quieter but the nature of his personality doesn’t help.

The clang of Katsuki's phone dropping to the locker room floor is the only sound made after Iida's question. A cracked screen is the last thing on his mind as his head jerks back to the two boys down the locker room bench. Izuku seems to ponder Iida's words for a moment before his eyes widen in realization.  

“Oh! You’re right. Sorry, I guess I just…it’s a habit of mine my mom used to do with me and it just stuck,” Izuku responds, quickly glancing at Katsuki before looking back expectantly to his friend in front of him. 

“Although I don’t necessarily mind, I do question if you see me as your son since you said your mom did this with you-” Iida says, hand on his chin in a pondering stance. 

A laugh Katsuki hasn’t heard in years emerges from Izuku's mouth, bubbling to the surface because of Iida's unorthodox response to his explanation. Kaminari and Sero's cackling can be heard behind him as well.

“No no no, you’re definitely not my son Iida. It’s more of a…well, it’s hard to explain but it’s just a sign of affection? That’d be the closest word I’d use for it,” Izuku explains, gesticulating his hands in an attempt to make sense of the kiss. 

“A-affection?” Iida screeches, Katsuki could practically see steam coming off of his head. 

“Yea! We’re best friends right? Why shouldn’t I show affection to my friends?” Izuku says matter of factly, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. 

Katsuki suddenly realizes he's been just staring into his locker full of sweaty clothes for way too long. He doesn’t know why but it feels like he’s just swallowed a heavy stone, closing up his throat and nestling in his stomach to weigh him down. It’s not like he didn’t know that Izuku liked to show affection to the people he loved, he experienced that first hand while growing up. Maybe Katsuki was the first person he had to show affection to in the ways the Izuku wanted to. Sure, both he and Izuku had other friends as kids, but they were different. His other friends didn’t have family dinners every Sunday with Inko's steaming hot dishes laid out on the table, begging to be inhaled. His other friends didn’t draw hero costumes for each other. His other friends never got as excited as Katsuki and Izuku did over seeing All Might on the television. His other friends certainly never offered to kiss his bandaids on the bathroom floor. 

But all of that eventually faded away, and it’s not like Katsuki can’t admit it was his fault because it is. He pushed him away as some fucked up defense mechanism born from Katsuki's bewildered feeling in his gut whenever Izuku offered help when he clearly didn’t need any. He knew this. He knew how Izuku treats his closest friends and Katsuki knew that the reason why it’s not directed towards him anymore is nothing else but his own fault. Despite this, he can’t help but feel a sting of betrayal at the fact that Izuku will just kiss any extra’s bandage that gives him the time of day. Fuck , who is he kidding, Iida is a better friend than Katsuki ever was to Izuku. If anything, he deserves any kind of affection Izuku is willing to give. Still…he can’t help but feel like something special, sacred, and theirs has been tainted by some outside influence. It had him wiping his sweaty palms on his pants before grabbing his blazer in an attempt to speed out of the locker room to get away. 

“Hey Midoriya, will you kiss my wounds too?” Kaminari asks, clearly poking fun at the situation. 

“Yea can you be my new Recovery Girl?” Sero says, amusement lining his words.

Katsuki opens his mouth to snap at them, it rubs him the wrong way at the fact that it seems like they’re making fun of Izuku. 

“Of course! You’re all my friends!” Izuku laughs before Katsuki can even growl in annoyance. 

The amount of laughing that's going on in the locker room makes it feel like Katsuki is being suffocated. Izuku just offered to show an affection Katsuki had thought was reserved for only him to any dipshit in their class! Whatever, it’s not like Katsuki has any right to hoard it for himself. It’s not like Izuku would actually do it now anyways. So he does something he never plans to do: he shuts up. Of course, his grouchy personality doesn’t completely disappear. He still scowls as Kaminari holds out his broken finger from class that day in front of Izuku's face while he lays a peck on the metal splint. Pulling on his socks and shoes as violently as possible, he glares at the group laughing at Kaminari's dramatic scene of acting like he’s magically healed and at the best of health ever before stomping out of the locker room. 

 News of Izuku's willingness to show his favorite type of affection spreads like wildfire. Ochako thinks it's the cutest thing she’s ever heard, squeezing Izuku and lamenting on how she’s grateful that they’re friends. Although Katuki never misses her flaming cheeks whenever he sees them patching each other up after sparring. Kirishima says it is the manliest thing ever while Iida says it’s admirable that Izuku can express his care for his friends in the ways he wants to. Aoyama seems to sparkle brighter than ever whenever Izuku kisses his own fingers before touching them to his laser belt when he’s sick. Mina always insists on smooching him on the forehead as well, saying that they have the same ‘love language’, though Katsuki frankly has no idea what that means. They slowly become accustomed to Izuku's way to express his feelings while Katsuki is left to silently glare while watching mostly everyone but himself be at the mercy of Izuku's special way to say he’s friends with people. 

Katsuki still spars with him, still gives his 100% at attempting to make the best of their rivalry while slowly trying not to explode whenever he hears Izuku's annoying voice every time he mumbles up a storm. Every so often when he conveniently has extra food prepared and Izuku conveniently walks into the kitchen Katsuki offers to give him a small portion. Inch by agonizing inch, Katsuki is attempting at becoming someone better than whatever the fuck type of demon he was in middle school. He’s killing it… obviously, especially after apologizing back in their first year. He wins at everything he does and becoming proper rivals with Izuku is nothing different. He knows this, and yet Izuku still doesn’t move to give not even the slightest peck on either a bruise on his forearm or a laceration on his deltoid.

Him and Izuku patch each other up more than anyone else, but every time Katsuki searches his face for some sort of sign that Izuku wants to kiss him. It has him kicking himself mentally for not even realizing he’s searching for Izuku to ask if it’s okay for him to kiss his wounds again. Hell, he’d take Izuku only kissing his fingers and touching them to the bandage at this point rather than directly kissing the cut, which is what Izuku typically does anyway as a less direct kiss. If anything it’s motivation to not get hurt during their spars throughout the week so maybe his heightening heart rate and pit in his stomach while Izuku patches him up is a good thing. 

He only realizes that it is the opposite of a good thing that Katsuki didn’t confront Izuku about them being more friends than rivals earlier when he rushes back to the sparring gym after forgetting his water bottle on the bench. Most of the class is in the locker room while he’s speed walking to the doors, but before he can slam open the door in annoyance he hears Izuku's classic laugh, accompanied by Ochako's as well.

Luckily, the door into the arena is tucked away in a cutout of the gym along with some benches and lockers while around the corner is the rest of the gym. Slipping through the doors as quietly as possible, Katsuki lurks at the corner, turning around slowly to see Izuku with the first aid kit laying to his right with Ochako sitting in front of him. The arena is trashed to say the least. Izuku must have been testing Ochako's ability to hold as much cement as possible due to the rocky terrain around them. That and the medicine bottle laying next to Ochako gives the impression that they were really testing limits today. Despite them both being covered in dust with cuts on their cheeks and arms bleeding slowly down their skin, they’re both smiling like nothing could change the happiness coursing through them in the moment. 

Katsuki scowls, moving towards his water bottle on the closest bench, there’s no way they’d realize he was here anyways. They’re always in a little world together giggling like school girls and permeating the training area with their annoying laughs. Walking back, water bottle in hand, he notices it suddenly went very quiet with only the whirrs of the air conditioning making noise in the gym. Backtracking a step, he goes back to peering around the corner. 

Izuku is clearly deep in his concentration with his tongue sticking out of his mouth while wrapping Ochako's fists, indicating they did some quirkless hand to hand as well. His eyes are stuck to her fist but Katsuki notices that Ochako is staring with the most intense expression he’s ever seen right at Izuku’s face, closely leaning into the shared space between them. Typically Izuku goes for the more indirect kiss route, but this time he draws up her hand to lay a soft kiss on each of her knuckles, sufficiently making Ochako's face look like a tomato while her eyes look like they’re nearly burning. Katsuki's stomach drops to the floor as he sees her lean mere inches forward to pick his lips up from her knuckles and raise his head to meet her. She pushes forward a little more while a sound of surprise emerges from Izuku, before he closes his eyes and rests his hand along her jaw, slotting her ear and hair between his fingers. They both draw away, leaving Katsuki as breathless as both of them seem. Although Katsuki is admittedly breathless for a completely different reason. 

“Uraraka-” Izuku starts, moving his hand along her jaw.

Katsuki makes sure to slam the door as loud as possible when he leaves the arena. 

It’d be ridiculous to go to the weight room or any gym for that matter to let off some steam given the thought of a gym makes him nauseous right now. However, he’d still go stir crazy if he didn’t do something , so he reluctantly goes to the kitchen to make the most violent bowl of curry he’s ever made. He only looks up from his distraction when he hears the door opening and Ochako and Izuku stumble out, laughing to themselves and smiling widely with a latent blush dusting both their cheeks. Nearly snarling, Katsuki stirs the sauce quicker in the pot. The closer they get the closer Katsuki seems to shrink away, mentally begging for neither of them to talk to him. Unfortunately, Katsuki can’t catch one single break because while glancing up for one second he meets Izuku's eyes, which immediately brighten as he perks up at the linked eyesight. Katsuki just frowns and goes back to stirring, but he knows that won’t deter Izuku in the slightest. He bids goodbye to Ochako, who nearly skips with glee out of the kitchen area while Izuku sits at the island counter opposite to Katsuki. 

“Whatcha making Kacchan?” he asks innocently.

“Curry,” Katsuki grunts, pouring the curry over rice in his bowl.

“Ah so that’s what smelled so good in here,” Izuku laughs. It’s got an awkward tint to it, like the adrenaline from kissing Ochako is bleeding into his conversation with Katsuki. 

“Duh, my food always smells the best,” he retorts, shoving a spoonful into his mouth. Damn. He made it super spicy this time. 

“Not sure Satou would appreciate that Kacchan,” Izuku responds.

Katsuki can’t help but smirk. “Like I give a fuck, you know who’s the best around here.”

Luckily, Katsuki's ego never fails to lift Izuku's spirits these days. “Obviously, I’m not stupid,” Izuku responds, sarcasm lacing his words.

“I beg to differ.” That gets another laugh out of Izuku.

He shoves another bite into his mouth while their conversation falls into silence, Izuku fiddling with his nails and chewing on his lip. Katsuki knows he wants to tell him about it, but frankly Katsuki couldn’t be bothered to bring up him and Ochako…

Okay so it very much bothers him. To a high degree, although he doesn’t exactly know why. Eventually he gives in and snaps, the least he can do is be his friend right now which is what Izuku clearly needs. 

“You gettin’ with Round Face now or what?” he asks, staring into his curry.

He sees Izuku's spine snap straight, before his hand goes to rub the back of his neck. “Ah, so it was you that saw us.”

“Seeing you sucking face when I was just trying to get my water bottle was not something I planned. So yes, I saw,” Katsuki bites, trying not to let venom seep through his words. 

Izuku groans in embarrassment, covering his face with his arms and leaning down on the countertop. “Sorry, I really didn’t know she was going to do that.”

Katsuki just snorts, he really is an idiot when it comes to these things. Despite Izuku becoming more confident throughout his time at UA, there’s still some things he hasn’t unlearned due to the years he spent isolated and alone, devoid of any semblance of friendships or affection while growing up after Katsuki decided he wasn’t worth the effort. It’s as if he’s blind to the notion that people actually enjoy his presence, even more blind to the fact that Ochako is head over heels for him. Katsuki feels his throat dry up again, just another thing that’s his fault when it comes to Izuku's inability to see that he makes her happy, that maybe they could’ve been happier than they’ve ever been together. 

“Idiot, you were the last person to know she likes you,” he says, refusing to raise his head from his meal on the off chance they meet eyes again.

Izuku winds his arms from across his face before sighing in frustration. “I…It’s just I’ve never even thought that she saw me that way. No one’s ever even seen me that way in my whole life anyways! And even then she’s…she’s just so pretty and I really didn’t know how to respond but it-it felt…I don't know how it felt! She was all soft everywhere I touched like her hair, her lips, and her skin. It was really nice okay! A-and I never really thought about the way she made me feel before then but it’s not like I was blind! I know she’s beautiful and nice and brave and…” he rambles, pausing to take a breath. 

Katsuki can barely handle any more of his mumbles, he finally raises his head and interrupts the boy across from him. Izuku is stressing himself to death at this point, heaving in breaths and voice wavering. 

“Oi! Stop yapping, it's ruining my dinner!” he snaps, brows furrowing. 

Izuku’s eyes widened. “Ah! Sorry Kacchan! I know you really don’t care about this stuff.” 

Katsuki huffs, that really wasn’t what he was meant to accomplish with his interruption. He doesn't hate it when Izuku feels comfortable telling him his thoughts anymore. If anything, he wants Izuku to become more accustomed to talking to him without stuttering in fear or flinching every time he raises his voice. Luckily, it hasn’t been like that in at least two years but moments like this make Katsuki question whether they’re really friends at all. He was left unchecked for most of his life and it cost him, so who better to keep him in check than Izuku? Izuku's willingness to meet him at every step and push him to new heights is one of the reasons why he likes spending time with him. It was a rocky terrain that Katuski was walking and it definitely was one of the most challenging things he’s ever embarked on but atoning for his behavior as a kid only made it more obvious that this whole time he wanted Izuku by his side. After all, they were going to be damn good heroes together. 

“That’s not--I meant you were just giving me an ulcer with second hand stress from your rambling. You can…I dunno, tell me shit if you want,” he grumbles, stabbing his curry. 

Izuku immediately perks up and his eyes widen, before his lips begin to wobble a bit. “Kacchan, did you just…are you being nice to me?” 

“I can be NICE you nerd!” Katsuki retorts.

“Of course Kacchan, how could I forget,” he giggles, dragging his fingers through his hair making it frizzier than it already is. 

“Damn right, I’m the nicest fucker out there you should be grateful I hang with your ugly mug,” he snaps, thank fuck Izuku meets his grumpy remarks with sarcasm more often now. 

“Right?! Uraraka is way out of my league,” he groans, dropping his forehead on the counter top.

“Oi, I’m not tolerating you spewing shit you hear me?! She's…You’re…” Katsuki tries, realizing he was going down a dangerous road there. 

“I’m what?” Izuku inquires, raising his head to peer at Katsuki.

Katsuki frowns, turning away from Izuku while his face grows hot. “Youre…you’re a…nice person. She’s the lucky one if anything. Or some shit like that.”

“K-Kacchan!” Izuku yelps, cheeks growing warm as well. 

“Don’t Kacchan me, shithead! I won’t have you talking about yourself like that, only I can make fun of you!” Katsuki yells. 

That just makes Izuku's lip wobble more as tears gather in his eyes. “T-Thanks Kacchan!” 

It almost looks like Izuku wants to walk around to hug him, but it’s not like Katsuki is in any place to ask that of him. So he doesn’t respond and leaves Izuku to calm down himself while he finishes off his curry.

Right before taking his last bite he stills, Katsuki has to know but he doesn’t necessarily know why.

“So…you gonna date her or something?” He grits, forcing the words out of his mouth. 

A wobbly smile appears on Izuku's face, eyes shining and he sighs wistfully. “Or something yea…”

They start dating officially three days later and Katsuki manages to convince himself that he’s happy for them. 

It’s safe to say Katsuki was appalled the second he walked into the common room, exhausted from his patrol at his internship and being yelled at by Mirko for hours on end. It’s late, later than usual when he comes back and his back feels sore from having to whip around with his explosions. The sun is seconds away from setting and the rays spill through the doors as he trudges towards the couches in hopes of making it to the kitchen for a snack. He means to throw his internship bag onto the couch but what he sees almost makes him drop it onto the floor near his feet. 

Todoroki is looming above the biggest couch in the common room, which is soft, gray, and U shaped conveniently placed in front of the television to facilitate more people being able to lay on the couch for movie night. He’s talking softly to a person laying down on the couch, before smiling sadly and nearly flops onto whoever is laying on the couch. Eyes widening, Katsuki shakes his head and shuffles past, regripping his bag. Whoever Todoroki is lying with he could give less of a shit, it’s about time that asshole finally expressed some emotion and some fucker is at the tail end of it apparently. 

After shoving a protein bar into his mouth as fast as possible, he makes his way back through the common room in hopes to make it to the elevator without running into any stupid extras. Due to the fact that he is walking the opposite way he came in, the person who is lying with Todoroki is completely in view. It’s fucking Deku. Scrolling on his phone and combing his fingers through Todoroki's hair without a care in the world, as if he doesn’t have a girlfriend on site to cuddle with as well. Katsuki stares for a moment too long, startled out of said daze when Izuku lowers his lips and kisses red and white strands of hair, laying his cheek on the top of Todoroki's head. The other boy is out cold, slowly breathing while his head is resting on Izuku's chest and his arm snug across his waist. 

What the fuck is he doing?

A stride akin to a stomping troll takes over Katsuki's body as he nears the two on the couch. 

“What is going on here?!” he hisses, only somewhat mindful that Todoroki is sleeping.

Izuku jumps a bit, dropping his phone onto his chest to look frantically at Katsuki. Todoroki groans a bit at the jostling, tightening his arm around Izuku's middle. 

“Mmhm…Natsuo?” Todoroki hums. 

Immediately Izuku frowns, pulling Todoroki closer. “It’s Izuku, Shouto. It’s okay you can go back to sleep, I'll protect you.” 

“Mhm, okay,” he whispers, settling back onto Izuku.

A few moments pass until Izuku throws a sharp glare at Katsuki. “You better have a good reason for doing that.” 

“Excuse me? What the hell are you doing? Don’t you have a girlfriend? The fuck are you doing cuddling with some guy?!” Katsuki murmurs under his breath, moving closer to the two as he scowls. 

“Todoroki is not some guy Kacchan, he’s one of my best friends,” Izuku retorts, rolling his eyes. 

“Oh wow! That makes this so much better! You’re cheating on your girlfriend with your best friend!” Katsuki grounds out sarcastically, teeth bared. 

Izuku sighs exasperatedly. “I’m not cheating on Ochako, Todoroki is and will always be just a friend. He’s like my brother Kacchan, c’mon.”

“Well!? Why are you letting him climb on you like a koala while you twiddle your fingers in his hair and kiss his big ass head?” Katsuki utters. 

“Kacchan…” Izuku starts, running a hand in his hair and then dragging it down his face, sighing deeply. He’s silent for a beat, before saying with clarity: “You have…no idea how lucky you are to have a dad like Marsaru.” 

Katsuki rears back, that was the last thing he expected. What was this nerd on about talking about his dad when he asked why he was playing sleepover with Todoroki. He takes a step forward and plops down half a cushion away from the two, frowning at Izuku.

“What does my dad have to do with this, did you even hear what I said? Are you deaf or something?” Katsuki says, voice threatening to rise.

“Todoroki and I…our dads haven’t exactly been the nicest to us if you haven’t gathered that from the years,” Izuku snaps quietly.

Now it’s Katsuki's turn to roll his eyes. “Fuck off, of course I know that. What does my wimp of a dad have to do with that?”

“What I would do…for a dad like yours…” Izuku sighs, eyes shining while he breaks eye contact to stare at the ceiling. 

Katsuki had a feeling Izuku wasn’t finished, so he just waited for him to continue while sitting uncomfortably on the couch. Despite every instinct he had was to glare at Izuku and yell at him. 

“There’s been this… hole my entire life since he left. It-it’s fine because at this point it’s been so long that I don’t even notice it, but when Todoroki told me about his…problems with his family, I couldn’t help but recognize the loneliness that comes with having a shitty dad. We’re not the same…not in the slightest. B-but we were both deprived of something that we needed growing up. He was barely allowed to see his siblings and I…you know I never had siblings, or many friends for that matter,” Izuku mutters, risking a glance at Katsuki. 

Oh. Katsuki had just…he took away the only good father figure in Izuku's life when he pushed him away didn’t he? Bile rises up his throat and his brows furrowed in anguish. He almost doesn’t catch what Izuku says next because his mind is filled with cotton.

“I mean at least I had my mom, but Todoroki…he just never felt safe at home growing up. So I…offered to give him that when he needed it. I can’t fix or get rid of the pain but if I can alleviate it a little bit then who am I to keep that to myself? If he needs affection and protection from a sibling he never had, and if..if I need a brother too and he’s willing to be that for me how can I refuse?” The tears in Izuku's eyes turn happy as he explains, smiling bashfully while his mouth wobbles. 

For the first time in a long time…Katsuki was thoroughly speechless. He’d never even comprehended the fact that his dad was there for Izuku more than his own dad ever was. Hell, his own dad probably liked Izuku more than he liked Katsuki since he actually listened to adults half the time and didn’t scream at every possible instant. Marsaru had taught the both of them how to ride a bike for fucks sake.

Katsuki frowns deeper but his eyes are slowly becoming apologetic, although Izuku is the only one who realizes this. He feels sick to his stomach and it’s like his mind has left his body. Dammit. The moment he thinks things are getting better for them something else bursts through the surface and reminds Katsuki of all the ways he’s made Izuku Midoriya's life a living hell, and how in many ways the damage is irreparable. Every time this happens it feels like splinters that have healed skin over them are being ripped from beneath the callous. 

He inhales deeply, looking down at his clasped hands that are squeezing together. He can’t even conjure up something that would actually make this somewhat okay. He can’t resort to his defense mechanism of being an asshole, Izuku would see right through him and get upset. He obviously couldn’t just go out and apologize for everything he’s ever done again to Izuku because that would make it seem like he’d only done it because he was confronted by it not because he actually wanted -- needed-- to show Izuku he was sorry and that he wants to be friends again. It would just overwhelm Izuku and that’s really the last thing he wants to do. So, he settles for something smaller than whatever the fuck is flowing through his brain right now. 

“My dad…he really likes you. I remember him always sighing wistfully like a loser whenever you would leave, telling me about how I should behave like a good kid. Behave like you. But I never was a good listener huh?” Katsuki finally says, a scoff following his words.  

He didn’t expect a response, but the silence that comes from Izuku still stings and sits heavy in Katsuki's mind. C’mon Katsuki, what the fuck else could be said to make this better. 

“You’re biological dad don’t matter anyways. You’ve got my dad, right? You’ve got All Might too. He’s…he’s good.” Katsuki breathes hard through his nose, it’s so hard trying to be nice sometimes and not just jostle or yell at the nerd to understand that he’s got people there for him and he doesn’t have to be alone now. 

He risks a glance at Izuku, who is staring up at the ceiling with tears slowly creeping down his freckled cheeks. It’s as if he feels Katsuki’s gaze on him as he turns to meet his stare. Nothing but a sad smile and an apologetic expression appears on his face. 

Fuck this, he can do more. “You’ve got Aizawa too. And 1A! They’re…they’re all there for you and better than any shitty nobody you were friends with before UA.” 

It hurts that he can’t even consider to include himself. It’s not that he doesn’t want to, but he just doesn’t deserve to. He just wishes Izuku could realize that he wants to stand next to him and let themselves be able to lean on one another without outright saying it, but Izuku deserves someone who is always on his side. 

A small breathless laugh interrupts his thoughts, sending a shiver racing down his spine. “You've never been a shitty nobody.”

Katsuki's frown becomes unstable, lips trembling and his eyes refuse to meet Izuku. 

“Yea.” It’s all he can manage before he stands up abruptly and walks out of the room as fast as he can.

His feet feel as if he’s floating down the hallways rather than stomping, given that he can practically feel his heartbeat in his eardrum and the blood coursing through his body. His breathing is erratic as he slams the door to his dorm room, sliding down the surface onto the floor. Resting his forehead on his knees he curls himself into a ball and tries not to cry. Miraculously, he makes it to the bed only to pass out seconds later of exhaustion. 

It takes seeing them on the couch coming back from his internship only once before he can’t take it anymore. He’s gotta do something . He can’t just sit back and wait for the perfect moment to actually tell the nerd that he wants to…he doesn’t even know what he wants to do, he just wants Izuku to know they’re friends more than rivals. So maybe, just maybe , he’d not get that heavy rock in his stomach when he sees Izuku kiss one of his classmates. Maybe if Izuku knew that Katsuki felt the same about them being friends again he'd kiss his bandages again. 

As much as he hates it, he’s gotta take the first step here. Izuku was never one to pull punches, but it’s clear that if he were to want to show Katsuki affection he would think that Katsuki hated those kisses more than anything. There’s always that nagging voice in the back of Katsuki's head that tells him that Izuku would rather kiss anyone other than him but…he just can’t stand it anymore. If Izuku was able to show friendly affection to him as a kid, why can’t he do it now? Katsuki has never been the best with words, especially when it comes to conveying his feelings for Izuku. Hell, it took him weeks to think of what to say when he apologized to Izuku only for it to come out in one fell swoop like he’d practiced it the night before. Izuku just had to go and pass out moments after but he was proud of himself for talking like a normal person for once. This time…it was a bit less orchestrated.

It was a few days after catching Izuku and Todoroki cuddling. Katsuki had still trudged into the common room later than he wanted from his internship. He had still plopped his shit down while rushing to the kitchen to inhale some food before going to bed. Energy seeped out of his body while he was eating now that the promise of food wasn’t keeping him going anymore. However, said adrenaline spiked again due to the fact that Izuku was taking up one of the couch cushions, contorting his body in an attempt to disinfect a laceration on the back of his tricep. Katsuki just scoffed before sitting down hard on the couch making Izuku jump and then hissing in pain at the movement. 

“You’re gonna give yourself more cuts than you already have idiot, give the alcohol to me,” Katuski says, already grabbing the disinfectant from Izuku's grasp. 

“You don't have to--” Izuku starts, before yelping at Katsuki roughly tugging his injured arm towards him. 

“Shut up,” he grumbles, wiping the cut clean. 

Izuku doesn’t do so much as twitch slightly at the stinging of the alcohol dragging over his cut, he had gone a little too hard in training with Kirishima this afternoon and the sharpness of his unbreakable is getting quite impressive. Despite Katsuki's temperament, he was always the most delicate when it came to patching each other up. His nimble fingers are perfect for positioning any bandages perfectly upon a laceration or smoothing down and tightening the gauze. Katuki has always had laser focus when needed and this is no different; his deep carmine gaze stares at cuts as if they’re going to attack him at any moment, biting on his lip while leaning in close to configure a bandage just right. Of course, he always paid more attention when it came to Izuku but whoever was at the tail end of Katuski's nursings couldn’t help but hold their breath while he did so. Finally, he finishes patching up Izuku's arm cut, smoothing out the gauze for a bit longer than necessary with the thin pads of his fingers. 

“Anywhere else?” he murmurs. 

“Mm, my lat and my palm. If you could do my lat I’d really appreciate it. I can't exactly reach there,” Izuku says sheepishly.

“Alright let's get on with it. Strip,” Katsuki grunts, grabbing more alcohol wipes. 

“W-What?!” Izuku squeaks, cheeks reddening.

Katsuki just rolls his eyes, ears becoming a bit red himself. “I can’t exactly fix your lat with your shirt on dumbass.”

Izuku huffs, pulling his shirt off and hissing at the stretch. Mere seconds later Katsuki's fingers are caressing along his back. Lightly wiping away the sweat and blood, the only sounds reverberating throughout the common room are Izuku's shallow breaths and the pounding of Katsuki's heart. As much as Katuki loves the quiet, this is the kind he can’t stand. He can almost taste it, palpable electricity vibrating throughout the air. 

“No koala Halfie today?” Katsuki croaks, attempting to break the tension. 

Izuku chuckles lightly, going to itch the back of his neck. “No…we don’t do that every night.”

“Coulda fooled me with all the daddy issues he has,” Katsuki huffs, hoping Izuku picks up on the humor in his words.

“Too soon Kacchan! He asked me to!” Izuku scolds, a wry smile making his way into his expression.

Katsuki scoffs and rolls his eyes. “He’s just a big baby, give him a big pillow and he won’t be able to tell the difference.” 

“That’s not the point Kacchan,” Izuku responds, rolling his eyes. 

“Mhm…” Katsuki hums with the utmost sarcasm, diverting his focus from their conversation to finishing the bandage on Izuku’s lat. 

A few tense moments pass; Katsuki hopes he didn’t kill the mood by making fun of Todoroki. That is, before Izuku suddenly starts giggling.

“I can’t believe you thought I was cheating on Ochako with him.” 

“Well?! What was I supposed to think you were making out with his candy cane hair right in front of me?” Katsuki squawks defensively. 

“Really Kacchan? I wasn’t…making out with his hair! That's gross!” Izuku says, mouth twisting in disgust.

“Wouldn’t put it past you, ya weirdo,” Katsuki murmurs offhandedly.

Katsuki will admit he could have worded that better. He likes bantering with Izuku but sometimes he takes it too far.

“I’m not a weirdo for expressing affection for my friends in the way I want to. Todoroki is fine with it anyways! A-and Ochako knows too! So…! Ugh, I don’t even know why Im telling you this anyway, I don’t owe you anything,” he huffs, pointedly turning away from Katsuki.

Izuku tenses at his own outburst, hunching his shoulders a bit. Katsuki knew he didn't really intend for that to come out but it still had him feeling like shit immediately. He's right though, if anything, Katsuki owes Izuku everything. 

“W-wait I didn’t--” Izuku starts. 

“Fuck…you're right. You don't owe me shit. I was just…messing with you I guess. Didn’t mean it.” It was the closest that he would get to an apology on that front. 

Izuku deflates, sighing deeply. “I just…don't know why you can't comprehend how I show affection to my friends. I-I know you were just joking Kacchan, it’s okay. Just got a little defensive is all.”

Katsuki huffs, finishing the bandage on his back and moves to the hand. Izuku tries to resist Katsuki bandaging his hand because he can clearly reach it and clean it up himself but Katsuki just hold on to his hand tighter. Tense eye contact before Izuku just exhales and breaks the gaze, letting Katsuki help him.

Katsuki waits a few moments before speaking. Now that he knows Izuku is quite sensitive about his affections he's gotta tread lightly to fix this. Dammit, he's managed to do the exact opposite of what he's intending to mend here.

“I can… comprehend it just fine. Izuku." Eyes staring so intensely at the wound he's cleaning so he doesn’t have to meet Izuku's stare.

Izuku's eyes widen at the name use and a small gasp escapes him. Katsuki doesn’t know what to say other than the most embarrassing things ever: “I get that it’s your way to…show you care about your friends. It’s just…you know we’re friends too, right? At least I thought we were friends now. I know I fucked up with everything I did to you. Shit, I still fuck up but…I dunno, never mind forget I said anything.” 

Thank god Izuku didn’t interpret this as Katsuki practically begging him to kiss him. He just let his lip wobble and brows furrow.

“Y-you think we’re friends?” he whispers in awe.

Katsuki risks glancing at Izuku, who is nearly brimming with tears.

“Of course dummy, like…best friends? Or something stupid like that. '' Katsuki squirms in his seat and breaks eye contact, swallowing before moving back to wrapping Izuku's deep palm cut.

“O-oh! I never…I never even imagined you wanted to be friends again. Let alone best…best fr-. Hah…wow! This is-wow I didn’t even conceptualize or notice that you--”

“You're rambling, nerd.”

“Ah! Right, sorry. Just surprised is all, haha.” Izuku is chewing on his lip, nervously glancing across Katsuki's face in an attempt to read him. 

“You don't have to be my friend, I fuckin’ get it. Just some stupid pipe dream of mine I guess… ” Katsuki hurries, desperate to run away from this conversation. He delt his cards and told Izuku that he thought they were friends, or he’d like to be friends at the least. It seemed Izuku had no idea, which only makes Katsuki feel even worse.

“N-no! I want to be friends, Kacchan! That’s all I’ve ever wanted. I just…never thought you’d ever want to be something different than-than enemies or some kind of rival, I didn’t think-”

“We can be rivals and friends, idiot. I mean…if you want to?” Katsuki ventures. 

“YES!” Izuku blurted out, nearly jostling Katsuki by jumping forward in his chair. “I-I want to be friends! Best friends even! P-please…” he finished, embarrassed with how loud he'd gotten. A small sheepish smile on his face.

Katsuki's eyes widened, and for the first time ever it felt like his whole face was on fire. Heart beating and palms sweating; he hasn't felt like this in at least ten years. Katsuki's eyes traveled across Izuku's face, lingering on his smile. His lips. They looked so soft and plush, shaped like a small pout. Katsuki stared at his nose, glided his gaze along his freckles, and stared at the small knick in Izuku's left eyebrow from training with each other last year. He’s never been this close to Izuku's face before, and he finds himself wanting to move even closer, not just metaphorically as friends but physically closer to him.

Close enough to know when to balance out their attacks while sparring against each other or fighting off another villain. Close enough to tell each other their problems without having to beat each other to a pulp…most of the time. Close enough so that Izuku doesn’t flinch at Katsuki's hands enveloping his own. Close enough to tuck Izuku's silky curls behind his ear and inhale his lavender shampoo. He wanted to pocket this moment and feel the skin of Izuku's hand at all times. 

Why is he feeling like this? What the fuck was going on? 

“Yea, yea don’t let it get to your head. This isn’t gonna stop me from beating your ass in class and in the hero rankings so watch your back Deku,” he finally says, venom not quite seeping into his words. Izuku takes it as it is: a deflection. Izuku knows Katsuki is getting overwhelmed and that he’s embarrassed from feeling all those disgusting mushy friendship feelings. 

Izuku smiles knowingly in response. “I expect nothing less Kacchan.”

Katsuki nods tightly, pursuing his lips and moving to finish up the bandaging. As he’s tightening the wrap he’s overcome with the urge to do the single stupidest thing he’s ever thought of doing, but he can’t stop himself. He’s sick of watching Izuku be insecure about their friendship and fuck if he isn’t going to pound it into that nerd’s head that he wants to be hero partners with him.

So, after zipping up the rest of the first aid and giving it back to Izuku, Katsuki gingerly pulls at Izuku's hand. Turning it so that the bandaged palm is facing him, Katsuki drags it to his lips and softly lays a kiss on the bandage. He knows his ears are red and his jaw is clenched as he slowly lets go of Izuku's hand, moving to rest his own trembling fists at his sides. He braves a glance at Izuku, who he could swear was creating steam with how red his face is. They’re both breathing heavily and sweating despite not moving a muscle, both pairs of eyes wide and vulnerable

“Some idiot told me that helps you heal faster, so you’re welcome,” Katsuki grits out, before stomping out of the common room and to his dorm before he literally blows up. 

His heart rate barely slows as he recounts the most mind numbingly embarrassing thing he’s ever done, it has him screaming bloody murder into his pillow at least three times. Despite this, he still is glad that he and Izuku are on the same page now. The nerd even called him his best friend , take that stupid extras. 

Days then on were much easier, Izuku was much more touchy with him and even pecked a bicep burn once. Somehow, it still wasn’t enough…not by Katsuki's standards at least, which is odd since this should be what he was so desperately wanting with Izuku: a friendship where he can express his affection with him. where they can both express their affection in different ways. 

Nevertheless, he begins to pay more attention to the way in which Izuku acts around Ochako. Brushing their fingers before tangling them together, softly moving his thumb along her skin while talking with their friends at lunch. A quick peck on the lips before either of them go off to do exercises for hero class. Squeezing each other in an embrace when they greet in class. The way his thick scarred fingers sift through her hair and rest against her jaw. He can almost feel Izuku's hand on his own skin, trailing up and around Katsuki's slender neck and resting on the nape before pushing up into his spiky blond hair. Moving back to grasp his jaw and drag them both forward and…and what?! Kiss him? Is that really what his mind is moving to right now while staring at Izuku and Ochako mumble in their own little world across the lunch room? A cackle from Kaminari a few feet over breaks him out of his moment of weakness. However, this also makes Izuku look towards his lunch table and immediately make eye contact, making Izuku jump a bit and blush like a schoolgirl. Katsuki just scowls lightly, turning away to stab at his lunch, resolutely not thinking about kissing Izuku's hand. 

He hates that he feels a twisted sort of relief when Izuku breaks up with Ochako a week later,

Graduation parties are fucking stupid. What’s even more stupid, is the fact that Jirou somehow managed to convinced Momo to create some alcohol bottles to make some fucking disgusting jungle juice in a big bowl in the basement of her parents mansion. Lights dimmed and music nearly vibrating through the floor, Katsuki surveys Class 1A, most of 1B, and few general studies students chatter on about useless bullshit or dance with each other. He really didn’t see the point of it all. They’re going to be heroes and drinking mere days after getting their official licenses. 

Whatever. Not like he gives a fuck. He’s not drinking so there’s no way that he’d be kicked out of heroism before he even started. As always, his gaze magnetizes to wherever Izuku is in his periphery, watching him dance with Kaminari and Mina. Smiling wide and cheeks flushed from the few drinks he’s had, Izuku is twirling around them both and nearly screaming the lyrics to the song. Every so often a sound or bodies overlapping in front of the trio would draw Katsuki's attention away but every time his eyes return to Izuku's gross sweaty and flailing body in the sea of people. 

Izuku had taken to Katsuki's friend group a lot more since he broke up with Ochako. The whole thing wasn’t mutual in any respect, Ochako had still been annoyingly and hopelessly in love with him when he told her he didn’t feel the same anymore. It was a hit to both of them honestly. Katsuki still didn’t know why Izuku ended it; they were seemingly perfect together. He was constantly perplexed because Izuku seemed so sad by it despite him being the one to end it. Izuku had been wildly vague about the whole thing until he had suddenly cracked and started crying during their weekly study sessions after training with All Might. It really wasn’t Katsuki's business to inquire so he had just given the blubbering nerd a prickly hug, despite his mind and heart racing in an attempt to justify why he would break up with Ochako. 

She needed space, and Izuku was nothing but willing to accommodate her feelings. During their last months of UA, he had begun to eat lunch and train every so often with Katsuki's group of friends. At first he had mostly stuck to Katsuki's side, which he had no problem with. He was quite enjoying the opportunity to make fun of the nerd more often. However, after a while Izuku had clearly begun to get closer to Mina and Kaminari, their naturally bubbly personalities perfectly complimenting each other in the best ways. He still hung out with Todoroki and Iida more, but the distance that Ochako had put between them was bound to have consequences. He almost never kisses her in any way now, the closest being the occasional kiss to the top of her head whenever she goes to glue herself to his side in an embrace whenever she had a particularly hard sparring session with a classmate. 

Katsuki hates that he feels at ease at the fact that he has gotten closer to Izuku at the sacrifice of him and Ochako's relationship. The bubbling sort of guilt threatens to overflow when Izuku mentions that he would rather hang out, study, or train with Katsuki whereas before he might typically ask Ochako. 

The hardest thing about getting closer with Izuku is that Katsuki knows he doesn’t deserve it. He didn’t deserve Izuku's forgiveness and everyone knows he doesn’t deserve the unwavering friendship that he’s got right now. He knows this, but he can’t help but want more. It’s utterly infuriating and embarrassing, watching Izuku lean in close to whisper something in his ear and feel disappointed at the distance. He tries to accept that this is the closest that they can ever be, but the knee jerk frown that appears on his face when Izuku inevitably moves away from him might be something he never gets over. It’s a lot similar to the frown he’s sporting right now, watching Izuku cheer and jump with crinkled eyes and a sweaty forehead. 

Thankfully, Jirou eventually plops down on the couch to keep him company with her phone in her hand. “What’s up Baku?” 

“Wishing I wasn’t here,” He grunts reluctantly, abstaining from shoving her off since she’s one of the few he would tolerate in this setting. 

“Yea, yea Mr. Grumpy, pick out some songs for me, my queue is almost done,” Jirou says softly, a smirk seeping into her words. 

All he responds with is an annoyed hum, moving closer and looking at her phone while she scrolls through potential songs. Their conversation is pleasant given the setting and Katsuki isn’t really paying attention, which Jirou doesn’t seem to mind. They’re in the middle of choosing a new song when he hears a familiar squeal of laughter. 

Katsuki is immediately drawn to the sound, finding the dumbass trio now laying down nearly on top of each other in a bean bag towards the corner of the room. Izuku was squeezed in between both of them, tears gathering in his eyes from laughing too hard. Mina isn’t much better, cackling and throwing her head back. Kaminari had clearly cracked a joke, frantically moving his arms around while continuing his yapping. That fucker loves to make people laugh and Mina and Izuku always cave to his idiocy. 

Jirou was intently scrolling through playlists, distracted from Katsuki's staring. He craned his neck around the dancing bodies as he saw the three of them wind down from laughing only to snuggle closer into each other. It’s like he physically saw a bubble form around them. Kaminari's arm slithered behind Izuku and around his shoulders, hand resting on his green curls while Mina had wrapped her arms around Izuku's arm on the other side, draping her legs across both of the boy's laps. It made Katsuki's stomach churn and heart pump with some sort of warped jealousy. He’d never been that close to Izuku apart from beating his ass and pinning him to the ground while sparring. 

Katsuki squirmed uncomfortably in his seat on the couch, averting his eyes to try and find something that doesn’t make him feel like his stomach is falling through his ass. He sees Ochako and Tsu snacking at the chip bowl, Momo creating a graduation cap for Dark Shadow, or Kirishima and Testutetsu drunkenly activating their quirks to each other. Unfortunately, Kirishima and Tetsutetsu are close to the cursed beanbag. This time, when Katsuki looks at the three of them, the tenderness in Izuku's eyes while he looks at Kaminari is almost palpable. Mina's forehead is resting against Izuku's cheek while Kaminari runs his fingers through the green curls, making Izuku's already frazzled hair even worse. They’re murmuring and smiling softly to each other and it makes Katsuki want to stomp across the room and either rip Izuku from their grasp or just fall into the bubble that all three of them have created for themselves. He sees them all laugh again, quieter and much warmer than before. 

Moments later Mina lunges and begins to kiss Izuku on the cheek, she was always the one who seemed to beam the most whenever Izuku would give her a quick kiss. This one was different though. She latched her lips onto his cheek and pushed forwards, squishing his chubby cheeks. A bright pink hand grabbed his jaw before almost…violently pecking his cheek while he began to laugh. He blushed so bright Katsuki could barely tell that there was lipstick beginning to stain the cheek that Mina was kissing. Kaminari began kissing his cheek too. Now Izuku was just being squished in an affection attack and he looked as happy as ever. Mina's kisses moved to his hair as Kaminari trailed across his face to kiss his jaw. 

Then things got worse…So much worse. Katsuki was practically steaming in his seat at the sight, palms sweaty and itching to explode. His breathing picked up too and brows furrowed in anger. 

While Mina was busy snuggling closer and playing with Izuku's hair, Kaminari slithered his hand up Izuku's neck and rested it right below his jaw, thumb padded against the other boy's chin. Smoke was coming out of Katsuki’s clenched fist as he watched his two friends slot their lips together forcefully. 

No way. No way this was fucking happening right now. No way is Kaminari's alcohol stained lips pushing into Izuku’s pout. No fucking way was Izuku reciprocating, lips sucking and pulling at the others as if he’s trying to eat Kaminari whole. They can’t seem to keep their hands off each other, grasping at biceps or trailing fingers along a jawline and raking fingernails through hair; Katsuki could barely see Kaminari's lightning bolt anymore. 

Not only that, but he could practically hear Mina whining from where he was sitting on the couch. Her annoying whimper made them both break away, smiling bashfully as if they didn’t realize how carried away they’d gotten. 

Then…then Katsuki hears Mina yell: “I want an Izuku kiss too!” 

Alright that’s enough, at this rate he’s going to blow up the couch. Ignoring the concerned remarks that Jirou shoots his way, Katsuki storms out of the main room to search for some fucking fresh air. Luckily, he finds a pair of sliding glass doors that open up to an outside patio. Stumbling out of the thick air of the basement, he practically gulps at the freshness of the night while sitting down hard in one of the patio chairs. The metal chair is cool against his skin, blissfully lowering his body temperature which he was sure was practically boiling at this point. His breaths come quick and sharp, causing him to clench his shirt on his chest in an attempt to slow his breathing. After a few moments, he resigns to leaning forward and putting his elbows on his knees, showing his sweat soaked hands into his hair and tugging on the spikes. 

He’d never felt this kind of inadequate before. There he was, holed up in the common room with Izuku's bandaged body alongside him, begging Izuku in his own way to come closer to him and all Izuku did was… kiss other people like that. He wanted Izuku to know that he’s a safe place now, a place where they can both find comfort in each other. Katsuki knew that instinctively he would search for Izuku's company whenever he was feeling particularly shitty because he knew that Izuku would never judge him. Not only did he do that when he was down, but he longed for his company and a Good job, Kacchan! whenever he knew he killed it in class where everyone was watching. Even if Izuku's kisses were more sparse than he’d like, he still never flinched or tugged away whenever lips pecked his bandages or the top of his head.

So why… What did he do in a past life to have to witness Izuku chose other people over him right in front of his eyes not once, but multiple times. 

He can imagine it right now. Kaminari's big dopey smile and Izuku's bashful blush while they walk into the next party hands intertwined while everyone squeals and dotes on them, talking about how they knew they’d get together eventually. Who is Katsuki kidding, the fucking lovey dovey eyes they were giving eachother?! Give him a fucking break, there’s no way they don’t like each other. 

Fuck . Katsuki tugs his hair tighter into his fists. Maybe he does need a fucking drink. 

Suddenly he’s pulled out of his moping by the patio door opening again, the sounds of the party interrupting the silent chaos Katsuki has culminated in the patio. 

“Oh! Didn’t realize someone was out here,” Kirishima observes, sliding into the chair next to Katsuki, sliding down and spreading his legs. 

He risks a quick glance to his friend, who looks considerably more sad than usual. 

“What crawled up your ass?” Katsuki grunts.

Kirishima perks up a bit, before sighing wistfully and wiping his palms along his thighs. “Well I-I was just talking with Tetsu about…something stupid I already forgot. But then I saw…I saw Mina. She…she was kissing Izuku on this ugly bean bag while Kaminari…he was just cuddling up and kissing them both on the cheeks or whatever. Then he and Mina started kissing and I just…I just needed some air.”

Katsuki's whole face manages to frown somehow. Why did he always feel like as soon as he had a grasp on Izuku that he just fell between his fingers like sand?

“Yea…” Katuski says, it’s all he can muster up right now.

Kirishima rears back a bit. “Wait, what do you mean Yea ?” 

“I mean I saw Deku and Sparky sucking face and I almost vomited. That and I fucking hate parties so I’m out here,” he retorts, crossing his arms across his chest.

“Mhm…” Kirishima hums, clearly not satisfied with his response.

Katsuki just glares, he really doesn’t need Kirishima's perceptive ass to be on him right now. He’s not…ready in any respect to even confront these feelings himself let alone reveal them to someone else no matter how good of friends they are. All he knows is he wants to be close to Izuku, anything else is as good a guess as any. 

“I know Mina says her love language is touch and um…kissing, but I can’t help but just…I wanted to scoop her up and never let her near Izuku again! Isn’t that fucked up? He’s one of her best friends! All three of them love hanging with each other. I know this and still I just wanted her to see me instead. I want her to kiss me like that. I want her to kiss me differently actually! I know they’re just friends but…I don’t want to be friends with Mina I-” Kirishima rambles, alcohol loosening his lips.

“Oi! Quit whining I don’t need to hear your fantasies about Mina,” Katsuki snaps, although there is a latent wavering to his words. 

"Ugh, sorry man. I just...never mind," he relents, taking a sip of his beer. 

The heavy silence only gives way to Katsuki's thoughts to spiral out of control. Some of the things Kirishima was describing, like dragging Izuku away from the two bimbos on the beanbag and hoard his affections all to himself reminds him of his own thoughts only moments before stomping out of the basement. For the first time in a long time, he lets his mind wander in the frigid breeze of the night. He wonders about it would feel like to be squeezed next to Izuku on the cushion, letting his hands rest around Izuku's waist while he runs his fingers through silky green curls. He thinks about kissing Izuku's freckled cheeks like Mina did. Maybe...maybe he even thought about kissing him the way Kaminari did. 

But thats...that's a crazy thought right there.

If Katsuki's stomach clenches in fear when thinking of doing the things Kirishima wants to do with Mina, does that mean--

"Dude, are you good?" Kirishima asks, breaking him out of the fog in his mind and gesturing the smoke emanating from Katsuki's fists.

"Fine," he manages to grit out, voice like gravel.

"Right...you know you're not fooling anyone here," Kirishima snarks, taking a last gulp of his beer before crushing it with his hardened fingers.

"Fuck, fine! I'm just...thinking I guess," Katsuki relents, sighing exasperately 

"That's new." Kirishima smirks, looking to gaze up at the stars.

Katsuki responds with a snort, a small humorous reprieve from his thoughts. A few seemingly comfortable moments pass before Kirishima decides to be annoying again.

"So...?" he presses. 

"So what?" Katsuki retorts. 

"So what were you thinking about? It was clearly upsetting since you were a human smoke machine two seconds ago?" Kirishima tries, looking back to Katsuki's side profile, voice sympathetic and kind. 

"What you said." 

"When?" 

"Before."

"About Mina?"

“No! I mean…yes? Ugh! I just… never mind it’s stupid." Katsuki doesn't even know where to begin in regards to verbalizing his thoughts right now. 

"W-wait hold up, you like Mina?!" Kirishima exclaims, bending forward over the arm of his chair. 

"No! Ew! That’s gross." Even thinking about that makes him want to gag. 

"Hey! She’s not gross she’s beautiful!" The redhead defends, slurring his words a bit. 

Katsuki rolls his eyes and frowns. "Ugh, your drunk ass just loves talking about her." 

Kirishima's arms outstretch and his head shakes dramatically. "Duh, I really really like her! You already know this! She’s just amazing, not just like… looks wise but she’s just a great hero y'know? Like even before UA she had the heart of a hero. She’d just.. argh!! I can't explain it coherently right now, it’s just a feeling."

His friends rambling make his annoyance come to complete stop. Izuku makes him want to be a better hero, too. He's...Izuku has always had the heart of a hero, since they were kids, since he was born even. He...he hopes he makes Izuku want to be a better hero too. 

He glances back over to Kirishima to see the stupidest look on his face.

"Yea, yea, you're in love with her, no need to make me sick to my stomach," Katsuki drawls. 

"H-hey! I’m not in love with her… feel like I could be though sometimes," Kirishima admits, staring off and no doubt imagining him and Mina's wedding.

"Could be…" Katsuki mumbles fo himself, looking down at a crack in the cement in front of him. 

"Wait! If you don’t like Mina..." Kirishima begins. 

“Ew.”

"...Then why you were you thinking of what I said about her?"

Katsuki screws his face into a frown. “Just drop it, I don’t know what the fuck I was saying.”

Kirishima seems to shrug and drop it, opening up a second beer that he brought out onto the patio. 

That is...until he realises something and gasps dramatically. "You’re in love with someone!!”

"N-no I’m not! What the fuck?!" Katsuki yells, turning a heated glare at Kirishima. 

"You totally are! What else would you be thinking about if it wasn’t Mina! I was practically whining at the fact that she’s not my girlfriend,” he recounts, flashing a sharp smile. 

Katsuki just shakes his head even harder and makes an exasperated growl, only for Kirishima to get side tracked yet again. 

“Man, I don’t have a girlfriend…” Kirishima says to himself.

Katsuki sighs, deflating in his seat. This is seemingly the last type of conversation he wants to have at the moment. But he doesn’t leave because… maybe he can make sense of what the fuck he’s feeling by telling someone. He’d normally get vulnerable with Izuku but he can’t exactly tell him this type of stuff. 

"Soo… who're you in love with?" Kirishima says, a knowing smirk spread across his face. 

"I’m not...in love with--"

"Oohh, so you just like them a lot or something--"

"No! I don't like anyone Shitty Hair!"

"Going back to nicknames I see, now I know you’re lying." Kirishima is laughing like an idiot while Katsuki's bubbling like a volcano.

"Fuck you! I-I don't…I’m just…fucking…I don’t even know!" he cries, throwing his hands in the air in frustration.

Kirishima just continues to look at him expectantly, thankfully waiting for Katsuki's thoughts to catch up so he can formulate his words.

“I’m just…confused okay? Some of the things you described kinda…reminded me of things I feel about--”

“Oh my god dude!!”

"What?!" He snaps. 

“I never thought this day would come…" Kirishima murmurs, it’s like Katsuki isn’t even there anymore.

"Shut the fuck up!"

Kirishima finishes off his beer can before dropping it on the ground and crushing it with his foot, breathing in and turning towards Katsuki with fire in his eyes.

“You’ve put up with my whining about Mina for months, it’s only fair that I return the favor and help a Bro out. Who is she? Is she in our class? UA?! Tell meeee!!” He's is almost out of his chair in excitement, sadness over Mina kissing two other guys seemingly at the back of his mind. Whatever the drunk mind wants it gets. 

She. Katsuki frowns at the pronoun. Does this make what he feels for Izuku…different? It had never even crossed his mind. Hell, having some sort of… crush on him had never crossed his mind either. 

“I don’t…It’s not even like that…” Katsuki mumbles lowly, it’s clear he’s trying to convince himself but Kirishima isn’t having it. 

“Okay okay, lemme help you walk you through it like Kaminari did to me,” Kirishima resituates himself, as if he was Katsuki's therapist about to drop some hard truths. 

Katsuki glares, danger and fear shining in his eyes. Something conflicting is swirling in his gut. On one hand, he wants to understand whatever the fuck kind of confusing things he’s been thinking around Izuku for the past few weeks. He hates not knowing things if it isn’t obvious. 

On the other hand, deep down and nestled at the bottom of his heart, he knows the answer he’s been dreading since Izuku first kissed his All Might bandaid all those years ago. It…it scares him. Katsuki is ashamed of only a few things and afraid of even less, but somehow this… thing involving Izuku falls into both of those categories. 

“Don’t give me that look, I’m trying to help you!” Kirishima pouts. 

“I don’t need your help-”

“Do you think about them everyday? Think about doing mundane type of shit like making breakfast or just…watching your favorite TV show?” his friend inquires, leaning closer.

“Uh...” Katsuki does, in fact, think about doing random small things with Izuku. Whenever he’s cooking there's a nagging voice in the back of his mind that urges him to either make a serving for Izuku or to imagine him clumsily chopping vegetables on the counter next to him. They…they watch All Might movies together all the time. Whenever a new hero documentary, movie, or show comes out they’re both itching to watch it together. Despite Katsuki making fun of Izuku for being a nerd at every possible moment, he felt content at the fact that Izuku knew he didn’t mean it. 

“Do they make you want to be better? Like…not just hero wise but like…person wise? I don’t know if I’m making any sense here but-” Kirishima scoffs.

“Yea. Uh…yea it’s…it’s that,” Katsuki croaks. He wouldn’t be a hero without Izuku. 

“Oh!” Kirishima perks up at the interruption, clearly surprised.

Katsuki purses his lips, breaking eye contact. He adjusts himself in the uncomfortable patio chair, letting his knee bounce slightly. 

“So uh…anything else?” Katsuki murmurs, running a hand through his hair and tugging on it.

“Yes! Ah…Oh! I mean…obviously you’d want to kiss and hold hands with each other. Physical stuff like that,” Kirishima continues.

Katsuki frowns, he’s never actively thought of kissing or holding onto Izuku in an exclusively romantic lens…has he? 

“I-It doesn’t have to be that specific though! It’s just…I want to be close to Mina no matter the context. Whether it’s just sitting closer to her on the couch or even just-- damn this is pathetic-- standing closer to her,” he groans, leaning back into the chair. 

“Close, huh?” Katsuki hums to himself. He…all he wants is to be closer to Izuku. Hero partners who know each other's every move on the battlefield. Best friends who know every nuanced emotion. Just… people who are as close as anyone can be with each other. 

“‘N like…she smells sooo good, like coconut. Her shampoo makes her hair so soft too. I ruffled it once. Stupidest thing I’ve ever done and she chewed my ass out for it but it was worth it. She’s so strong too y’know? Like every time I see her punch the lights out of someone in training it’s like I’m seeing her for the first time again when she used to yell at those middle school bullies. Damn… she’s really something huh?” the redhead laments, starry eyes making an appearance again.

“Yea…he’s something alright,” Katsuki agrees, staring off into space. 

“Right?! I mean I can’t say enou--Wait…did you say he?” Kirishima looks like a rebooting computer. 

Katsuki's veins freeze on the spot like an ice cold bucket of water has been dumped over his body. He clenches his jaw so hard his teeth grind while he insists on staring at that crack in the cement patio floor. Smoke seethes through his fist while his knee bounces faster. It’s taking everything in him to not explode away right now, but that’ll only bring more attention from inside. He can feel the blood pumping through his heart and into his head. 

“Kat…?” Kirishima asks softly, leaning closer from his chair. 

Katsuki's lip wobbles as he turns away from Kirishima more, nearly craning his neck. He really didn’t mean to slip up like that. He’s so fucking stupid but Kirishima wasn’t stupid, he’d understand what was going on immediately, drunk or not.

“Sorry for assuming man. There’s nothing wrong with your…whatever he is…being a guy. I’m not an asshole okay? I’m not gonna think differently of you either.” Kirishima assures, voice even and heartfelt. 

Katsuki coughs lightly, inhaling before rubbing at his eyes in an attempt to ready himself for meeting Kirishima's gaze. 

“It’s uh…it’s Midoriya isn’t it?” Kirishima swallows awkwardly. 

Just like that, the facade fucking shatters. “That fucking obvious, huh?” Katsuki scoffs, pain seeping into his words, dragging his hands down his face.

He can practically sense Kirishima's shrug. “Not really? Not unless people knew you were…”

“Gay.” He’s never even said the word out loud even though deep down he’s always known he was different; it feels like an anvil dropping onto his chest. 

“Yea...that.” Kirishima forces out, wincing a bit. 

It's like he just ran a marathon with how the energy seems to be sucked from his limbs at the moment. Katsuki sighs deeply, leaning his head back and closing his eyes in an attempt to slow his breathing. Everything's is open now, and it’s the weirdest type of fear that he’s ever experienced in his life. It’s not like he thought Kirishima would think he was disgusting for his feelings, Katsuki knew he didn’t have to be afraid of that. What he’s fucking petrified of is the fact that he recognizes internally and has said verbally that what he feels for Izuku is just… more . More in the sense that now that he knows how he feels, now it’s so much more tangible. More real. More of a problem. 

“Listen Kat, none of us are gonna judge you okay? Least of all Midoriya. It’s kinda funny actually…I always thought he had a crush on you in his own weird way,” Kirishima attempts, giving him an encouraging smile.

“ Right. That’s why he was sucking face with those two dumbasses inside,” he responds, rolling his eyes.

Kirishima sights, clearly frustrated. “Dude, I don’t really get it either. Sure, it makes me feel jealous… really jealous. But when I think about it, Mina isn’t mine. I haven’t got the balls to ask her out right now anyways, so who am I to get mad at her for being affectionate with her friends? And if…if they’re more than friends then I guess I lost my chance huh?” His friend leans back heavily into his chair, expression pinched. 

Katsuki knows Kirishima is right, he knows . He knows how important Izuku's kisses are and why he gives them to people. Knowing doesn’t make it hurt any less. He sighs again, rubbing at his eyes with the heel of his palms. 

“Fuck.”

“You said it man.”

A somewhat comfortable silence envelopes the patio while both of them process whatever the fuck just happened, Kirishima taking a bit longer due to the alcohol still swirling in his system. A few minutes pass by until Katsuki pipes up.

“Let's go home, I’m beat.” He’s done with this conversation, these thoughts, these feelings . He’s never been more ready to sink into his bed and pass out for hours on end. 

“Sounds good, you want me to grab Denki?” Kirishima asks tentatively.

All three of them had decided to get a place together out of UA, after much deliberation. Originally, he was all in when it came to Izuku. He apologized. He asked to be friends again. He said it’d be a good idea to be hero partners. He’d been the first one to introduce the idea of them moving in together after graduation. Apparently Izuku's limit was moving in together, and at first it made Katsuki extremely embarrassed, causing him lash out at Izuku and they didn’t talk for the rest of the day. That is, before Izuku showed up at his dorm that night holding Katsuki's favorite spicy chips and a pint of mint ice cream, ready to explain himself.

Izuku was right, of course. Since they’d be spending every waking moment together at work due to the nature of their partnership, Izuku thought that they’d eventually drive each other crazy. Which…fair. 

So here they are, Katsuki living with two fuckheads in an apartment complex down the street from Izuku and Todoroki's own apartment. He’d be jealous of their relationship if he didn’t respect Izuku's insistence on them being brothers and the fact that Todoroki is….himself. 

Normally, he’d waltz in there and pick Kaminari up and carry him upside down to the car, but right now…right now he’s upset. He’s upset and he wants to be petty just to be petty. He’s got a pretty good feeling Kirishima isn’t in the best mood to go see Mina potentially still kissing someone other than him either. 

“Nah. Let's just leave,” Katsuki says, already booking it around the house to where he parked up front. If Kaminari is so preoccupied , then his new kissing buddies will figure it out. 

He doesn’t come home until at least two days later. Katsuki tries not to drive himself crazy thinking about what he and Izuku might have done together.

Months. Months went by with the knowledge that Katsuki was borderline in love with his hero partner and best friend before he realized that he acts the exact same as before. He’s always had these underlying feelings, bubbling beneath the surface just ready to overflow. His heart still races at the sight of Izuku dragging a hand through his hair. His eyes immediately are drawn to him whenever they’re both in the room. Body warm when they’re making dinner in his apartment. Smile threatening to break through when Izuku meets his every challenge. It’s fucking distracting is what it is, causing him to lay in bed before sleep every night trying to calm his pulse while thinking about the soft pad of Izuku's lips brushing his skin.

His innate need to seek out Izuku also comes in handy when they’re facing off villains; that dumbass just loves to sprint into the fray with minimal thought processes about his own wellbeing beforehand. In fact, this sixth sense of sorts is coming in handy right this moment. 

They were separated…again. A robbery turned hostage situation had quickly taken a turn for the worse and the villains were fleeing the scene and taking down anyone in their path in an attempt to move closer to the city for a hiding spot. Izuku had just yelled at him to move upward towards the sky to find them while he went through the alleyways before Katsuki even had a chance to respond. He was right, Katsuki was better at navigation from above and the sharp turns of alleys or roads, as well as delivering a mind numbing final move once Izuku has his Blackwhip restraining any villain who dares to fuck with them. 

So here he is. Firing off smaller explosions and flying above the low rise buildings in the residential area before the villains manage to get to a more densely populated area of the city, which would not be pleasant at all. He manages to keep his eyes sharp, glancing in between alleys but maintaining his vision on the groups of people bleeding through the streets of the city. Just before he resolves to give up and just trying to find Izuku is when he sees them. Unfortunately, he hears them as well, given that they’re torturing Izuku right in front of his eyes.

Deep breaths, don’t be stupid. Think like a nerd before rushing in and saving Izuku. 

There’s only two men, average stature and no mutant genes present to the naked eye. One’s got his hand around Izuku's neck and breathing heavily down his open mouth, a thin plume of blue smoke being forced down Izuku's windpipe. It’s got to have some sort of paralytic affects, given the slight twitching of Izuku's legs while he’s hanging in the air and only small sparks of One For All dancing across his skin. It seems like the smoke needs to be very close to the recipient for the effects to take hold, so Katsuki should be able to take him out from farther away. This fucker shouldn’t be too challenging to take out, it’s the other one that worries Katsuki slightly. 

Squinting at the top of the building and peering into the alley, it’s almost as if the other man's nails are extending from the root into thin, almost string-like, blades wrapping around Izuku's bicep, squeezing the blood out and puncturing into his arm. He’s got both one set of five wrapped around his forearm and five more creeping up his bicep towards the slope of his neck where his partner's hands rest. 

No way in fucking hell will those blades make it to Izuku's neck though, not if Katsuki has anything to say about it. 

“Hey assholes!” Katsuki yells, drawing their attention away from Izuku. 

Hopefully that's enough for him to slip out of the paralytic for even a millisecond. 

Clearing his head, Katsuki aims an AP Shot at the blade emitter, loosening his grip on Izuku. He fires off two more for good measure before blasting down deeper into the alley. Using the momentum, he aims a precise and heated blast right in the face of the paralytic quirk user, effectively stunning him before going for a kick to the chest, landing on the muddy cement of the alley and pinning him to the ground. He sees Izuku stumble away, paralytic wearing off, but Katsuki focuses on taking the villain out first. The fucker attempts to heave out a blue breath, only managing a soft huff before Katsuki pushes his knee into his chest and punching the lights out of him. A few wisps of it are sucked into his lungs, thankfully only making his nerves fray and become a bit numb. 

Before he can sufficiently celebrate the win, numerous deep and thin lacerations pierce into his back and tricep, making him grunt in pain. Whipping his head around and staying low, he sees the other villain a few yards in front of him. A burst of air from behind Katsuki propels the villain back a bit, stunning him for a few seconds and attempting to regain control of his blades.

“They can’t be snapped, they’re as strong as diamonds. It takes a bit for him to determine their trajectory but if they wrap around an appendage then you’re in trouble,” Izuku rattles, flicking his finger one more time. 

“You go for stun and distraction?” Katsuki offers, he doesn’t have to explain that Katsuki will go through with the take down. 

Izuku nods thankfully, One For All percentage increasing. He goes jumping like a rabbit across the walls of the alley, distracting the villain and skillfully managing to dodge most of the thin blades flailing along the alley. Emphasis on most , given the fact that despite Deku doing everything and suffering a few slices here and there, Katsuki can’t find an opening. He smokes up the whole alleyway with explosions while his hero partner zings around but those thin blades keep invading his plans. 

Fed up would be an understatement if one would describe Katsuki's mood, but that annoyance quickly fizzles out as he sees the villain's blades suddenly thicken and rear up for a massive slash. He’s suspended in the air above the villain right now, given that his attempts to go from a more level area weren't working, leaving Izuku to stay on the ground…which is exactly where the blades are headed. 

Something lurches in his stomach and practically on command his hand heats up with an explosion towards the ground directly in front of the villain, reaching out to trap the blades around his own arm so they don’t slice the love of his life nearly in half. Luckily, they’re not strong enough to slice his whole arm off, only dig into his bicep and some of his gauntlet as the blades wrap around from the momentum. He nearly passes out from the pain, grunting as the warm blood seeps through his hero costume. The surprised yelp from behind him reminds Katsuki that he did this stupid stint for a reason. Now that he has the blades caught, he yanks backward, sending the villain stumbling a few steps. 

“Go Deku!” he screams, feeling the blades thinning slightly only to dig deeper into his arm. Turns out he became the distraction after all. 

He feels more than sees the energy crackling off of Izuku many yards behind him as another set of blades rear up much quicker than before, probably due to the fact that the villain thinned out his blades to make them reach farther. He knows he's distracted from the pain of numerous blades being yanked through his flesh and attempting to stay out of his way, causing the next set of blades to crack like a whip across Katsuki's face and neck. Blood seeps into his eyes and mouth as he clenches his jaw to quell the scream rising in his throat. He grabs randomly in the air in an attempt to grab more of the blades, only managing to get two and slicing his palm yanking them again to make sure Izuku gets an opening that he couldn’t manage. 

He’s nearly blind with pain and blood when the blades start to slack and detach from his arm and hand, causing him to stumble into a strong set of arms. Luckily, he knows those arms blind and immediately slumps forward as he’s eased to a sitting position on the alley wall. He coughs a bit before feeling his grenades click and fall from his forearms, giving him a much needed weight reprieve.  

“Kacchan? Hey, talk to me?” Izuku asks, wiping blood from his face attempting to get a look in his eye. 

“‘M not blind…didn’t cut my eye out. Jus’ hurts,” he explains, adrenaline seeping out of him. 

“O-okay, that's good. The blades weren’t too thick on your face so stitches shouldn’t be needed. They look much worse than they are given the amount of…blood. Your neck might be worrying though. Here…fuck, take this…press it there. Yea. Good. Let’s just-” Izuku rambles, eyes widening and lips beginning to quiver.

“You’re rambling, nerd,” Katsuki interrupts. 

“Right! Sorry, let me look at your arm and I’ll shut up, I promise,” Izuku sighs, scarred fingers gingerly grasping his mangled bicep. 

As Izuku wraps his arms as best he can to stop the bleeding, Katsuki already misses his voice and pathetically regrets telling him he was rambling. The feeble bandage immediately begins to dampen; it’ll have to do until the medics get here.

The cuts on his face have slowed slightly, only cracking back open when he winces in pain. He begins to close his eyes once he hears the sirens pull up, hopefully Izuku took care of the villain. He forgot to ask. 

“Don’t close your eyes!” Izuku yelps, shaking Katsuki a bit too forcefully. 

“For fucks sake I’m not dying! Jus’ resting my eyes for two seconds,'' Katsuki groans, feeling the laceration on his chin and lip split open again. 

“Ah sorry! Just…you’ve lost a lot of blood and I don’t want you passing out on me,” Izuku says, stress lacing his words. 

“‘M fine, saving your ass as usual,” he laughs roughly, attempting a joke. 

This only serves to make Izuku look more like a kicked puppy. “Kacchan…”

“I’m fine , Izuku. Here, help me up. Least you can do is be my cane out of this disgusting alleyway so the medic can clean me up,” Katsuki offers. 

Izuku just nods, helping him up with a gentleness that is unneeded but Katsuki is grateful nonetheless. Thankfully, he can see the sun through his blood crusted eyes, attempting to gauge the general vicinity where the medic is. His cane manages to help him onto the back platform of the ambulance. 

“Well, what do we have here?” an assumed medic questioned. 

“I got cut,” Katsuki says, wiping blood off his lip.

“Get in the van Dynamight, we’ll get you stitched up properly at the hospital. You’re thin facial cuts shouldn’t need stitches though, after cleaning those up you should be out later tonight,” the medic explains, helping him sit back into the truck. 

Katsuki pouts the whole way to the hospital; he really wanted Izuku to patch him up instead of some shitty doctor. 

The stretching from the stitches and the sheer exhaustion from the healing quirks has him leaning on Izuku more than he normally would given the circumstances. He barely even notices the way Izuku's palms cling to his waist while being hobbled into a vehicle or the gentle hum of Izuku's voice to the car radio. Nor does he fully conceptualize that he’s not at his own apartment elevator or the different ugly carpet pattern in the hallway. He feels like he’s floating when his body is lowered into soft pillows that are permeated with a woody and sea salt scent. The nimble fingers dragging through his hair and massaging his scalp lulls him easily to the deepest sleep he’s gotten in a while. 

That serene feeling that washed over him was quickly disrupted when he woke up the next morning, arm throbbing, face tight with pain, and his palm practically on fire. 

“Ah Fuck,” he groans, removing the sheet over him as slow as his body will allow it. 

Thanking whatever higher powers there are, his legs don’t hurt as he stalks into Izuku's bathroom off of his bedroom. Before he can even think about pissing, he catches a look at his face in the mirror and begins to peel off the small bandages of the lacerations on his face. They were thicker and uglier than he thought once they're revealed. At the time he was so hyped up on adrenaline they felt like paper cuts, but looking at them now while they’re red and healing makes him stop and lean closer to the mirror. There’s one that begins at his upper temple and stops at the edge of his eyebrow; that one isn’t too bad. Another one, a bit thinner than the rest, swipes across the high of his cheekbone and down across the rest of his face until it stops at his right chin. Another thin one is slashes along his neck, stopping just next to his jugular. The last one only cuts across his lip, although it's much deeper on his cupids bow and below his lip on the left side of his chin. 

Katsuki frowns at the scars, touching the scabs and stretching them as if he can’t believe they’re real. He doesn’t realize how long he’s pawing at his face before the cut in his lip begins to bleed again. Swearing he goes to turn on the sink quickly, only to reopen the cut in his palm as well. 

“Fuck!” 

“Kacchan?!” he hears from another room in the apartment. 

A flushed and frantic Izuku speeds into view, nearly falling into the bathroom and into the tub. 

“Are you okay? What’s wrong?! Did you split your stitches?” he rattles off, moving closer to Katsuki at the sink. 

“Alright alright don't pop a blood vessel, I just split my face cuts is all!” Katuski retorts.

A full body exhale flows through Izuku's body. “Okay…okay. Let me grab some supplies, the nurse said we’d have to clean your wounds eventually anyways.”

“We ain’t doing this in your tiny ass bathroom,” Katsuki sighs, already walking out of the bathroom, desperately needing space from his own reflection. 

Izuku throws his hands up in exasperation, before filing through the cabinets to get the alcohol, bandages, and a washcloth. This leaves Katsuki to stalk into the bedroom, plopping down on the soft rustled sheets, only to be greeted by Izuku's floor length mirror and his slowly bleeding face. Huffing, he shoves past the bedroom door into the living room. He falls onto the plush cushions, a few droplets of blood getting on his pants. Clenching his fists in an effort to not explode, he turns his head to look out the window and away from the offending blood dripping on his pants and down his neck. 

The rain slides down the glass panes of the window to his left, mirroring the pouring rain outside and the patterning of the droplets being the only sound in the room. It only takes a moment before he loses interest in the rain, focusing instead on his reflection in the window. There’s more blood than before, albeit slowly moving from the thin cuts in his face. Katsuki had never been one to focus on looks before, but at this moment he’s never felt more…ugly. 

Jerking his neck away from the window, he resolves to stare at the fraying carpet on the floor in front of him, feeling his cut palm grow warm and wet as he clenches it. 

A door closing shakes him out of the thick fog that seemingly surrounds him. Get a hold of yourself. 

“Alright I got some alcohol and some wash clothes, you didn’t bleed in your sleep so I’m honestly surprised you’re…” Izuku begins, only to trail off once he sees Katsuki on his living room couch. 

He must look like a proper maniac, thin trails of blood creeping down his face and neck with widened eyes and quick breathing. Izuku's expression is wildly upset, leaving Katsuki to wonder if he’s gotten any blood on the carpet or couch. 

“Uh-” He doesn’t even know how to apologize for this. 

“Are you okay Kacchan? I mean--I know you’re okay physically but…you just had the weirdest look on your face, like you were somewhere else?” Izuku probes, sitting on the coffee table in front of Katsuki. 

Katsuki just grunts in response, unfurling his clenched fists. “You know better than to ask that.”

That's practically a big fat 'No, I’m not. I’m the farthest from okay and you can see that' in Katsuki language and Izuku knows it. 

Thankfully, Izuku just sighs deeply before sitting on the coffee table across from Katsuki and laying the medical supplies to his right. He doesn’t pry about Katsuki's mood anymore, although there is a lingering pinch in his brow while he disinfects and cleans Katsuki's wound on his palm. The stinging of the alcohol and the drag of the washcloth distracts him from any more introspections about how being this obviously scarred will affect his life. 

Desperate to distract his mind, Katsuki's eyes linger on Izuku's own scarred arms, visible through the tight T-shirt stretched across his bicep. Izuku never cared that much about his scars; neither has Katsuki until now really. He’d never be ashamed of taking a hit for Izuku, be ashamed of saving him. So why are these stupid face cuts making him so uneasy? He can barely stand looking at his reflection, for fucks sake. 

Without thinking, Katsuki brings his uninjured palm to trace along the thin cuts on Izuku's arm; he had almost forgotten he had gotten cut by that villain too. 

“These hurt?” he asks, rough fingertips tracing along thin scabs. 

Izuku seems surprised by the interruption, fingers stuttering while wrapping the bandage around Katsuki's palm. He glances down, before smiling softly. “Oh, these? Basically paper cuts, the villain was just trying to scare me.”

Katsuki hums in response. “So, they don’t hurt?”

Izuku’s smile turns sad and knowing. “No Kacchan, they don’t hurt. Do…do yours hurt?” 

“Mhm, a little,” he mumbles, dropping his fingers from Izuku's arm, scabs on his face beginning to form and blood drying on his cheeks. 

“More than a paper cut I bet,” Izuku jokes, attempting to lighten the mood, tightening the bandages on Katsuki’s palm. 

“Heh, a fuckin’ ugly paper cut that's for sure,” he scoffs offhandedly. 

The fingers tracing along the bandage stop abruptly and Izuku's gaze jerks to him. “Who told you that?” 

Shit. He forgot that Izuku can see right through him sometimes. “The mirror?” he offers up as a joke.

That only serves to soil Izuku's expression more, opening his mouth to no doubt try and attempt to make Katsuki feel things that he’d rather not. 

“It’s a good thing they’ll scar, I guess, make me more intimidating to villains. I can scare them off before even having to fight them. Probably make stupid brats cower away and not ask for autographs either. Heh, all I’d have to do is so much as glare and they’d--” he’s rambling and he knows it, trying to find a way, a justification, a reason why he should be okay with this. 

“Kacchan…” Izuku takes his bandaged hand in his, squeezing it a bit too tight. 

Katsuki doesn’t meet his eyes, preferring to study his reflection again. Anything to get his mind off the charged moment Izuku just created. 

He can’t feel it that well through the bandage, but Izuku’s lips burn on his skin all the same. His hands have always been extra sensitive, and even though he hoards Izuku’s kisses like a dragon to its treasure, his heart never fails to skyrocket when those soft lips brush against his palm. 

“Being scarred proves you’re a good hero. You survived. You saved me, like always.” Izuku says forcefully, dragging the washcloth across his face and down his neck, soaking up the dried blood from moments before. 

“Yea,” Katsuki responds, before clenching his jaw.

Izuku thinks this is some… hero thing, like he always does. He can’t even comprehend for a second that this is deeper than that, so much more fucking embarassing than that. He’s never even thought his face would be a reason as to why Izuku would reject his affections; he’s always thought it would be his less than desirable attitude or the shit he pulled when they were younger. Now he’s got a whole other bullet point to the list as to why he doesn’t deserve anything Izuku gives him. He’s feeling selfish almost, with Izuku here taking care of him like always, taking up space in his bed last night, hoarding his attention like he always has. It’s not right, he doesn’t deserve this--

“Kacchan…?” Izuku asks, halting his movements. 

“What the hell is it?” Katsuki nearly shouts, feeling oddly breathless. 

“You were spacing out and breathing pretty quickly, are you sure you don’t wanna--” he offers, like always.

Katsuki sighs and screws his eyes shut, before snapping: “Don't you…I dunno, fuck…have anything better to be doing right now? Other than fixing up my stupid face that looks like it’s gone through the meat grinder?!” 

“It doesn't…you don’t look like…Kacchan what are you saying? We’ve always patched each other up without question since we graduated. Why are you--” Izuku eventually trails off, eyes widening, maybe recognizing the real reason why Katsuki's been this cagey the second he woke up. 

Katsuki's expression wobbles and his knee begins to bounce; it took longer than expected for Izuku to catch up. Not like Katsuki tried to make it obvious that he feels so low and disgusting right now, but in hindsight he was really hoping Izuku would just understand without him feeling the need to explain himself. It’s the cowards way out but he can’t help but take advantage of Izuku's ability to read him. 

Izuku has resolved to keep his mouth shut, for which Katsuki is both terrified and relieved. The stinging of the alcohol provides only a small amount of relief to distract him from his thumping heart rate. He finds his eyes slipping shut while Izuku lays the adhesive strips and bandages along his face, deciding it was easier to ignore the way Izuku's eyebrow furrowed and tongue slipped out of his mouth while he was concentrating.

His heart rate rises even higher when he notices that when Izuku is done, his fingers begin caressing the adhesive stuck along his cheek and jaw, absentmindedly softening his gaze. Gently opening his eyes, Katsuki halts the moment, snapping Izuku out of his trance and sending him back into the bathroom to put the supplies away. The millisecond he leaves the room Katsuki lets out a shaky exhale, clenching his shaking fists. 

Fuck this, he’s bolting. He doesn’t care that he left his sweats in Izuku's room from when he undressed and went to bed last night. He doesn’t care that he’s wearing Izuku's own clean clothes that smell like his detergent and body wash. He doesn’t care that he doesn’t have his house keys. He doesn’t care that he doesn’t know where his shoes are. He doesn’t care that this will only make Izuku more concerned tomorrow. He doesn’t care that Izuku's definitely going to try and pry the truth out of Katsuki. 

He…he cares too much about what Izuku might say about him, about them . In fact, he’s never been this uncertain in his life, so that’s why he's gonna tread home through the rain. He does need his shoes though he hasn’t completely lost it yet. 

Shuffling as quietly as he can over to Izuku's mud room, he scans for his black tennis shoes among the assorted ugly red ones and the prude shoes that Todoroki owns. 

“What do you think you’re doing?” Izuku says, breaking Katsuki's bubble with a stern glare. 

“Leaving?” he attempts, offering Izuku a rare smile to help his case. 

He just rolls his eyes, not taking the bait. “Get in the kitchen,” he snaps. Katsuki can practically feel his gaze pierce through his skin.

He stalks out of the mud room before Katsuki can answer him, not leaving room for an argument. Fuck. 

Gingerly sliding into Izuku's barstool, he looks at his partner violently whip a few eggs together in a bowl across the island. He’s never felt like a scolded child more, which only makes this push and pull interaction they’ve had the whole morning even more unbearable. 

The rice cooker alarm goes off, which has Izuku stomping away for a few seconds; Katsuki can hear the slap of the cooked rice in the two bowls. 

Before he knows it, Izuku slams the bowl in front of him with the scrambled eggs on top of the rice, obviously seasoned with Katsuki's favorite toppings and spicy sauces. Katsuki has the strangest urge to laugh in a fit of heartbreaking hysteria, even when Izuku is pissed at him he still takes care of Katsuki. Like it’s second nature to care for him in every way possible. 

Alas, his pity party is interrupted by Izuku inhaling his own eggs and rice, for which Katsuki begins to stare at with the oddest sense of vulnerability ever. He’s never felt like this before, watching Izuku quietly rage and not immediately attempt to get through an issue. Clearly, Izuku has an issue with Katsuki trying to leave, but it seems like it’s taking much longer than usual for him to collect his words, and it’s only making Katsuki's anxiety skyrocket. His own lack of eating makes Izukus steamrolling pause, before looking up and seeing Katsuki looking like he was about to cry. 

His eyes widen before immediately softening, shame coating his features. “Sorry! I uh…just in my own head. I’m not mad at you Kacchan, just…frustrated I guess.”

Katsuki hummed in response. “Picking up my bad habits I see?” 

Thankfully, that lightens the mood and Izuku's expression lifts. “What bad habits?” he says sarcastically, shoveling the rest of his breakfast in his mouth, before gesturing to Katsuki to eat his own with his fork and turning around to wash his dish. 

Fueling the soft and awkward atmosphere, Katsuki decides to stay silent and fill his mind with the sharp heat of the eggs and rice going down his throat. 

He’d thought that the conversation was relatively over until Izuku began to speak again. “Kacchan, are you…feeling a bit insecure about the scars? I mean, of course you probably are but you haven’t really told me what you're thinking about right now. It’s fine if you don’t want to talk about it! You know you can just tell me off but you’re being really cagey…like more than normal and I thought…I just thought we talked through things now. You know you can trust me right?” he nearly pleads, leaning forward over the tiled island towards Katsuki, who is nearly choking on his spicy breakfast over the sudden onslaught of words. 

“Fucks sake Deku calm down! We can’t both be freaking out at the same time!” Katsuki snaps, glaring at him after swallowing. 

Izuku's expression immediately turns apologetic. “Sorry! Sorry, I know this must be something to adjust to but I just...” he pauses, taking a long deep breath, “...I’m here if you need anything, to talk or listen or whatever you want. Just thought I’d remind you.” 

“I know. I know, trust me. It’s just…hard, alright?” Katsuki forces out, gaze traveling down to look at Izuku's hands rather than his shining emerald eyes.

He can practically sense the knowing nod that Izuku gives him, acknowledging yet keeping the conversation open for Katsuki to say more. 

“It’s hard because it's so…stupid to even conceptualize. I just wanted to not look like…whatever I look like now or else…someone won’t like me? Fuck, this sounds so fucking stupid just ignore me,” Katsuki word vomits, before shaking his head and continuing to eat. 

A soft chuckle causes his gaze to lift back to Izuku, only to find him smiling softly with something somber glinting in his eye. 

“Kacchan…you must know how attractive you are, with or without the scars. If anything it’ll make you even more--” he recounts, as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. 

“Hah?!” Katsuki scoffs, raising a scrunched eyebrow with his mouth basically hanging open. What the fuck did he just hear. 

“Oh please, you look just like your mother! She’s absolutely breathtaking!” Izuku says, cheeks a bit flushed.

Breathtaking, huh? 

“So…you don't think…” Katsuki can barely even formulate words since his brain seems to be rebooting. 

“Kacchan, other people aren’t going to dislike you or think you’re ugly because you’re scarred. If they do then they don’t matter,” he says with conviction. 

“But… you don't…?” Dammit, he doesn’t care about what other people think. 

“No, Kacchan, I don’t think you’re ugly with the scars. You really think I’m that shallow?” Izuku says, laughing nervously. 

Katsuki purses his lips and nods awkwardly, resolving to continue playing with the leftover rice in his bowl. 

Izuku laughs again, before looking at Katsuki; he can practically feel his stare trying to pierce through Katsuki straight into his mind to see exactly what he’s thinking. “Anyways why would my opinion matter, it’s not like--” 

This causes Katsuki's own face to warm up significantly as Izuku trails off, leaving him to resolutely glaring at his dwindling breakfast. Fuck, did he just give himself away by insisting on hearing Izuku admit that he doesn’t think he’s ugly. What level of pathetic has Katsuki sunk to?!

The sounds of his fork dragging at the bottom of his bowl is the only thing sounding out across the apartment as Katsuki vaguely registers Izuku stepping back to walk around the counter. The screech of the barstool next to his own becomes moves as Izuku takes up the space it previously held; Katsuki screws his mouth tight as his brows furrow deeper in an attempt to control his expression. Vaguely, he feels Izuku plant his hands on his stool and swivel it to the left towards himself, causing Katsuki to come face to face with him. His mouth is fixed in a determined yet hesitant shape, tight yet slightly wobbly. His eyes practically bleed of concern and pity while he examines Katsuki's reddening face, which only makes the blood pumping through Katsuki rise and his clammy palms clench at his side. He meets Izuku's soft expression with a harsh glare of his own, his mouth itching to yell to cover up whatever the fuck he was feeling right now. 

“Kacchan…do these hurt?” He asks tentatively, tracing the cut on his forehead with the pad of his finger, mirroring Katsuki’s question only a few minutes before of them in the living room

All he can do is nod, hoping he’s giving Izuku whatever he’s asking for. Luckily, Izuku doesn’t say anything more, continuing to trace the cuts with his fingers. It’s quite soothing, so Katsuki begins to lose himself in the sensation, only for it to be broken seconds later with the press of lips against his forehead. 

Izuku is…kissing along the scars. 

Katsuki's hands immediately squeeze harder, crescent indents no doubt imprinting into the palm of his hand. His breath picks up as something sharp and utterly nerve wracking permeates throughout his stomach.

Izuku continues to kiss down his forehead, only to stop once the cut ends along his brow. He then gingerly grasps Katsuki's jaw with both hands, turning his head so that he can kiss the cut crossing through his cheek and to the side of his chin. Too stunned to even protest, Katsuki allows Izuku to move his head any way he wants. It’s as if he’s left his own body and can do nothing but watch as Izuku seemingly heals him from the inside out. 

He’s thrown back into his own body when Izuku moves down to kiss the long but thin slash along his neck, causing Katsuki to forcefully exhale through his dropped jaw and clench his eyes closed. That was… what the fuck?

Izuku seemingly halts his movements at the sharp breath Katsuki had let out, but he only tilts his head back more, beckoning Izuku to continue. It’s as if Izuku's fingerprints are burning into his skin as they press on his jawline. 

Katsuki's breathing becomes more ragged as the kisses become more forceful and open, the stinging from every single laceration he has on his body fading to the background. 

Eventually, the fingers tilt his head back and their molten gazes meet each other. Izuku's freckles stand out against his flushed cheeks and Katsuki doesn’t even want to conceptualize how red he must look right now. 

Green eyes drop to his lips, where the only cut is left. Those stupid fingers move from cradling his face to softly drag across Katsuki's lips. 

“Does this one hurt too?” Izuku whispers, voice wavering. 

Katsuki was nodding before Izuku even finished asking. 

The smiling exhale Izuku lets out is nearly blinding, before their lips press against each other. It sends another shiver along Katuki’s spine and the heat in his stomach returns with a vengeance. His clenched palms unravel only to cling onto Izuku's shirt at his sides for dear life, pressing their bodies closer together. Their lips move and Katsuki doesn't think he'll ever forget the soft skin of Izuku's lips sliding against his own. 

He’s been…drowning for so long. Drowning in shame, fear, and apprehension to even think about being allowed to kiss Izuku like this. Izuku initiating this kind of intimacy has become some sort of fiery catalyst for Katsuki to indulge everything he’s ever wanted to do for the last few weeks, months, years probably. 

He grasps at his waist before dragging his fingers along the clothed notches in Izuku's spine. He squeezes Izuku's bicep before slithering his hands up to his neck, pressing him even closer to deepen the kiss. Their tongues probe at each others lips, eventually opening up to dramatically press against each other like they’ve been separated for years; Katsuki a bit more enthusiastic than Izuku as his tongue invades his mouth and licks at the his teeth. He finally gets to sift his hands through the soft green curls while he tastes the chapstick Izuku put on this morning and the spicy rice they just ate while nibbling at his lips.

Those strong and reliable hands grip at his waist with just enough pressure that has Katsuki humming into the kiss, which Izuku responds with a mind numbing soft moan. They pull apart a bit suddenly at the sounds, scanning each other's expressions for a few tender moments. 

Katsuki can’t…he can’t even conceptualize letting something like this go. Making it seem like this didn’t matter just to save his own battered ego. He can’t let this fall into some friendly gesture of affection from Izuku either. He wouldn’t survive if Izuku said something like that, as if he’d somehow misconstrued Katsuki kissing him. He’s got to say something first, something stupidly romantic that Izuku would like if he even felt half of what Katsuki felt. 

“Please,” he says, grabbing Izuku's scarred hands in his own. “Please let me have you.” 

As if that hadn’t been the most embarrassing thing he’s ever said, Izuku manages to make his heart stutter even more.

“You’ve always had me,” he murmurs, smiling as his eyes glisten as the soft patter of rain and their breathing fills the room. 

Katsuki huffs out a nervous laugh, sinking into Izuku's embrace and inhaling the scent of his detergent and body wash. The adrenaline is draining out of him as their paired breaths slow. Seconds, minutes, could be hours that go by before they decide to peel themselves off of each other. So many words are bouncing inside his mind yet none of it reaches his lips. Katsuki doesn’t know where to go from here, he'd never even thought he'd get here in the first place. He’d never believed Izuku would ever return his feelings. Never in a thousand years. 

“Kacchan?” Izuku’s voice is like an oasis in a desert. 

“Yea?” he responds, pressing their foreheads together. 

“So, just to be clear, you…?” Fucks sake, of course he still doesn’t get it. 

“Are madly in love with you, yes. Fuck, Izuku, how can I be more obvious,” Katsuki nearly cackles with the ridiculousness of it all, before grasping Izuku's jaw again and rubbing his fingers across those soft cheeks. 

Izuku's face rapidly resembles a tomato, causing him to stutter before forcing out: “W-what?! Uh…Well, I expected something along the lines of you liking me a bit but…that-that works too, I guess!” 

Katsuki's manic smile softens, before giving him a chaste kiss. Sue him, he couldn’t help himself. 

“Deku…All I’ve ever wanted was to be close to you and you close to me. Those years I was a fucking idiot and pushing you away just to realize I wanted… needed you by my side--” 

The dam had been opened with that kiss, and out came all these thoughts that have been overflowing within him for a while. It’s not just the fact that Katsuki can’t seem to stop himself from saying embarrassing things just to see Izuku smile, but it's the fact that he wants to tell him now. Izuku deserves to know all these things, it’s the least Katsuki can do. 

“...I figured, that’s enough for me to love you?” he finishes, peering into Izuku’s eyes.  

The tears Izuku had been holding back finally fell down his face. “Of course it’s enough Kacchan! You’ve…you’ve always been enough. More than enough, in fact, I can barely believe you feel the same.” 

“Barely believe…Deku I was practically begging you to start kissing my bandages again since I couldn’t stand the fact you were kissing everyone except me!” He insists.

“W-well I wasn’t sure you even wanted me to--”

“Then I had to watch you kiss people like…like I wanted you to kiss me. I’ve never even kissed anyone, how could you not know it’s only ever been you!” Katsuki's voice rises with exasperation. 

“Oh Kacchan, you know it’s always different with you. I wasn’t…Wait did you just say you’ve never kissed anyone?” It’s as if all the tension was drained from the encounter in seconds, only to be filled with Katsuki feeling like steam was coming out of his ears.

Well fuck. 

“I-Well…maybe?! What’s it to you, huh?!” He snaps defensively, crossing his arms and raising his chin in defiance.

Izuku laughs wetly, rubbing the tears from his face and eyes. “Me, Kacchan's first kiss, my first ever dream coming true.” 

Katsuki's brows furrow deeper as he blushes furiously. “Hah!?”

That only causes Izuku to laugh harder, doubling over with his arms across his stomach. The absurdity of it all catches Katsuki in a subtle laugh as well, shaking his head.

Shortly after Izuku sighs longingly, wiping the tears from the corner of his eyes. “Ahh, I love you so much.”

“Took ya long enough idiot,” Katsuki scoffs, moving closer to Izuku.

“What are you talking about? I've always loved you!” His neck just about snaps from the speed at which he meets Izuku's gaze. 

“Oh please, like you didn’t date Uraraka and then make out with Kaminari like an idiot- -”

“Kaminari and Mina are some of my best friends, you know that! We just…got a little carried away with our affection. A-and I only broke up with Uraraka because I realized I had feelings for you !” Izuku contests, as if it’s the most obvious thing in the world. 

For the millionth time that morning, Katsuki's brain short circuits. “Wha-”

Izuku smiles again, as warm as the sun, and moves even closer to Katsuki and loops his arms around his neck. “My most important kisses are always for you, you’ve got to understand that Kacchan.” 

“Yea, I got it. I just was…a little jealous,” Katsuki remarks, nuzzling their noses together. 

“A little?” Izuku teases, kissing each of Katsuki's cheeks. 

“Fuck you….A lot jealous then. I was really jealous. I wanted you to kiss me in every way possible,” he pouts. 

“I don’t think you could handle it if I kissed you at every possible moment I wanted to.” Izuku's devious smile always infuriates Katsuki in the best way possible. 

“As if! I can handle anything you throw at me!” he demands, giving Izuku's cheeks a kiss of their own. 

“Is that a promise?”

“Damn right it is.”