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To Know All of Him

Summary:

When Merlin and the knights get captured by a sorceress, Merlin is forced to take a truth serum. After revealing his secrets, will Merlin be able to regain the trust of the king and his knights?
Short excerpt:
The sorceress growled, “Enough games, now answer! What is your biggest secret?”
Merlin frowned, trying to fight off the serum, after several long moments of silence Merlin looses the battle and says quietly, “I have magic.”
Anthea grins, “there now, was that so hard?”
Lancelot winces but Arthur looks puzzled. Arthur, who had been observing the interaction with confusion finally chimes in with a cut off laugh.

Notes:

I've come crawling out of the shadows to write this and now I think I will be heading back into obscurity. I hope you enjoy this! It felt nice to write again and hopefully I'll start to feel more inspired soon and come back to writing.

Work Text:

It wasn’t often that a sorceress could get close enough to Merlin and the knights without being noticed by at least one of the group (i.e. Merlin). But on this particular day the group (read: Merlin) had let their guard down as they were less than an hour out from the citadel and hadn’t had any issues with bandits, mercenaries, or sorcerers the entire mission.

Gwaine was pestering Merlin about having managed to trip and rip his shirt the previous day while Merlin rode aside Arthur and did his best to ignore Gwaine.

Eventually something Gwaine said encouraged Merlin to retaliate. “Well I would not have tripped if I hadn’t needed to babysit Camelot’s bravest and strongest knights who can’t even make a simple meal for themselves, let alone set up a camp.”

Gwaine scoffed, “I’ll have you know I am perfectly capable of cooking, just because the princess has never had to fend for himself doesn’t mean the rest of us are inept.”

Merlin rolled his eyes, “Glad to hear it, that means you’ll be cooking our next meal then?” 

Merlin turned around in his saddle to smirk at Gwaine but froze when he looked back.

Gwaine raised an eyebrow, “Is there a problem Merlin?”

Arthur turned to look too as Merlin said, “Has anyone seen Percival and Lancelot?” 

Elyan’s eyes went wide and he looked behind himself to where Percival had been riding all afternoon. “He was just... Where could they have gone?” He twisted from side to side pulling his horse to a halt. 

Suddenly Gwaine’s horse reared up, sending him to the ground. Which would have caused Merlin to chuckle if he weren’t so focused on trying to determine what had spooked the horse. 

Merlin reached out with his magic but before he could so much as determine what was on them, he felt himself sliding off his horse and the world went black.

----

When Merlin came to, he saw all the knights including Percival and Lancelot and Arthur chained up to a wall of a makeshift dungeon. Merlin struggled in his bonds and saw the knights doing the same but he quickly realized that they’d be unable to break free. The bonds were tightly secured to the wall and were traced with cold iron, not enough to render Merlin unconscious but enough to keep his magic just out of reach.

The door to the cell swung open revealing a young woman in a long blue hooded gown. She carried with her a small vial of clear liquid. 

Merlin could sense her magic, even with the cold iron, and knew that she was the one that had ambushed them.

"This is a truth serum that even the strongest willed can't control." The sorceress says as she enters the room.

The knights all glare, "we'll never tell you anything," Gwaine spits.

The sorceress' eyes are locked on Merlin who is doing his best to will himself invisible. With the cold iron cuffs on his wrists this is nothing more than pressing his back against the wall.

"Oh I don't want anything from you, this is for your little servant here." She grins wickedly.

"Merlin doesn't know anything," Arthur argues, "he's not going to be helpful to you. Leave him out of this."

Arthur struggles slightly against his bonds, thinking Merlin will try to argue and take the potion for them anyway. Even if it might be poisoned.

To his surprise, Merlin doesn't say anything. He pushes his lips into a thin line and cowers back against the wall.

The sorceress ignores Arthur and the other knights and advances to Merlin. She leans in and whispers to him, "I know who you are, and soon your precious king and all his little knights will too. And they'll hate you Emrys, if you make it out alive you'll be lucky, but they'll never trust you again."

"Why?" Merlin whispered, "Arthur will save us, he's not like his father, just give me a little more time, you don't have to do this. Plus what’s in it for you?"

"He's a Pendragon," she hissed, and with that she grabbed Merlin's chin with a strong grip and pried his lips open to pour the concoction down his throat. After sputtering and trying to spit it back out, Merlin finally swallowed and the sorceress stepped back.

All the knights had fallen silent and stared in anxious anticipation. Lancelot was the only one not looking at Merlin or the sorceress, trying to appear as inconspicuous as possible.

Gwaine glared daggers at the woman and Elyan began to struggle to try and escape. Arthur was talking in a panicked voice, trying to remain calm and reassuring but it came across anxious.

"Merlin, you are alright okay, just don't say anything and it'll be okay."

The sorceress turned to Merlin, "let's test this shall we, what is your name?"

Merlin managed to stay silent for a few seconds but finally said in an alarmingly calm voice, "Merlin of Ealdor"

The sorceress huffed, "No, what is your true name?"

"Merlin of Ealdor," Merlin smirked.

Arthur watched the sorceress and saw what he thought was frustration cross her face. "And who do you serve, Merlin of Ealdor?"

"King Arthur," Merlin responded without hesitation this time.

"And why do you serve the tyrant king's son?"

Merlin glared at the sorceress, "Because he is a just and fair king and always does what he knows to be right. He puts his people first and shows compassion to all."

"But don't you get tired of just being a servant? Always stepped on and never recognized."

"No," Merlin said in challenge, "I don't do it for recognition or glory. I serve Arthur and Camelot because I believe in the future that he will bring. In the world that he will create for the people of Camelot."

The sorceress seemed to find something of interest in that, "And what does this world that you've imagined look like?"

Merlin managed to stay silent for a brief moment, he was trying to control his response, he would have to tell the truth, but maybe not the whole truth. “A world where everyone can live without fear. Where all people are treated with respect. And a world of justice and fairness for all members of Albion.” 

The sorceress fumed, she glared at Merlin, “You think your so clever don’t you?”

“Yes” Merlin smirked.

The sorceress shrieked, “That wasn’t a question!” She stamped her foot.

Merlin saw Gwaine, Elyan, and Percival stifling laughs. Arthur was just staring at Merlin with an unreadable expression.

“Well it sure sounded like one. Anyway, enough of that, I’ve got some questions for you.”

The sorceress scoffed, “What makes you think you get to ask any questions?”

Merlin smirked, “Because you are afraid,” the ‘of me’ was left out but the sorceress seemed to hear it all the same, “I know who you are Anthea, you are one of Morgause’s estranged followers. But the real question is, who do you currently serve?”

The sorceress, Anthea, glared, “How do you know that!?”

Merlin shook his head slightly as he tried to fight the potion, finally he found an answer that satisfied both himself and the truth serum, “You know how.” He smirked.

The sorceress growled, “Enough games, now answer! What is your biggest secret?” 

Merlin frowned, trying to fight off the serum, after several long moments of silence Merlin looses the battle and says quietly, “I have magic.”

Anthea grins, “there now, was that so hard?”

Lancelot winces but Arthur looks puzzled. Arthur, who had been observing the interaction with confusion finally chimes in with a cut off laugh.

Anthea spins around to look at the king and Merlin looks as well with trepidation. Arthur’s eyes are fixed on the sorceress.

“I was tempted to believe that your truth serum was actually working with all of Merlin’s praise. It had taken me by surprise. But I see now that he was just trying to fool you into believing it worked, which is rather clever Merlin,” Arthur looked over to Merlin with a small smile, Merlin gave a tight smile in return that didn’t reach his eyes. “But I mean magic? Really Merlin? You couldn’t have come up with something more convincing for your big secret? Maybe that you secretly have a wife, or that you actually enjoying being in the stocks, or anything else?”

Arthur shook his head, “I know Merlin, and I would know if he had magic.”

Anthea chuckled, “You really are rather daft, well I suppose I at least understand now how you’ve been able to hide for so long Emrys.”

Arthur furrowed his eyebrows, “Emrys? Who is Emrys?”

“Care to explain?” Anthea threw over her shoulder at Merlin, Merlin shook his head aggressively. “Well then, how about I just ask you instead. Who calls you Emrys?” She directed at Merlin.

Merlin grit his teeth for a moment, then answered, “You do apparently.”

Again the other knights besides Lancelot, attempted to hold back their grins.

Anthea smirked, “So clever, aren’t you. Who else calls you Emrys?”

Merlin frowned, for the first time since the serum had been forced down his throat, the knights began to grow concerned. Merlin seemed to be fighting something and was visibly straining. Finally, Merlin seemed to loose the fight, and he gasped, “The druids.”

Anthea knew that she had finally broken the damn of Merlin’s restraint against the serum so she asked a series of rapid fire questions that Merlin was helpless but to answer.

“Why do the druids call you Emrys?”

“Because it was a prophesized name given, and they believe that I am Emrys, the savior of the druids.”

“And how do they believe that you will save them?”

“By bringing magic back to the kingdom and restoring the balance of magic in the earth.”

“Why do they believe that you have the power to do that?”

Lancelot tried to distract Merlin by yelling, “Don’t answer Merlin, you can fight it.”

Merlin was crying and had sagged in his bonds, feeling defeated, all the other knights looked on with confusion. Merlin shook his head, “Because,” he tried to fight, “because I am prophesized to be the most powerful warlock to walk the Earth, and my magic is of the Earth and the crystal cave itself, so I am said to be able to restore the balance of magic to nature and bring peace alongside Arthur who will unite Albion under one rule.”

Merlin gasped at the end and let himself fall the rest of the way in his bonds so that he slid down along the wall. 

Anthea grinned. Arthur quietly asked, “Merlin? Is this actually true?”

Merlin just nodded as more tears rolled down his face.

Anthea grinned, “The potion should last for at least another half hour,” she announced as she made her way to the door. When she reached the door she shut it behind her and then with a wave, unlocked the bonds of Arthur, and only Arthur. 

Leon yelled after the sorceress, “Where are you going? What is your goal here?”

She just looked back, grinned, then vanished down the hall.

Arthur fell down to his hands and knees then slowly raised to unsteady feet. As soon as he was up and stable he rushed over to Merlin.

Merlin cowered back against the wall at Arthur’s approach, and the knights went into an uproar.

“Don’t you dare hurt him!” Gwaine yelled, “If you hurt him then you’ll lose me.” 

Lancelot and Elyan both asked for mercy for Merlin, reiterating Gwaine’s threat to leave should he hurt Merlin.

Merlin just cowered, ducking his head letting tears fall.

As Arthur got close to Merlin, he came to an abrupt halt. He realized then that Merlin was cowering because the thought Arthur was rushing over to strike him. When in fact the opposite was true. But Arthur wasn’t sure how to make Merlin believe that. So he crouched down to his knees, still several feet away from Merlin and said in what he hoped was a calm voice, “Merlin, please look at me.”

Merlin shook his head, “No, please, sire, if you are going to kill me please just do it.”

Arthur fought with himself as his eyes got misty. He wanted to yell at Merlin for thinking that he could ever want to kill him for any reason, but knew that that would only make current matters worse. So instead he said, “Merlin, I’m not going to kill you, or hurt you in anyway, I need you to trust me and just look at me.” 

After a few moments of silence, Merlin risked a glance up through his eyelashes. He saw Arthur crouched nearby looking at him with a soft and worried expression.

When Arthur saw Merlin look up he chanced it and moved a little closer until finally he could rest his hand on Merlin’s arm. He tried to rub soothing circles in his muscles as he was sure Merlin’s arms must ache from being pulled at by his bonds. “Lets get you sat up a bit better so that you don’t get hurt,” Arthur murmured for only Merlin to hear. 

Merlin was still tense but allowed himself to be moved back up into a sitting position so that his arms were no longer straining. With Arthur so close, Merlin could feel his breath on his skin and smell his musk that usually accompanied a long day of riding. Merlin tried to take comfort in this, “Let me explain, as she said, the serum is still in affect so you know I can’t lie to you, just please let me explain.”

Arthur looked on Merlin with sad eyes and shook his head, “No Merlin, truth serums are horrible nasty things, and I don’t want to make you say anything that you aren’t ready to say.” 

Arthur sighed and moved back to sit in front of Merlin, ignoring the knights around them, he talked low, knowing the knights could hear but only wanting Merlin to listen.

“You can tell me everything later. Right now we need to focus on getting out. But what I wonder though, is why that sorceress did this? Why go through all this trouble just to get you to tell your secrets and then leave? And why did she only let me out an no one else?”

“Because she was hoping you’d kill me.” Merlin mumbled, dropping his gaze again to the floor.

Arthur blew out a gust of air, “Have I really inspired so little faith in my people, even after more than a year being king?” He asked to himself, then to Merlin said, “I would never kill you Merlin, I hope you know that.”

Merlin shook his head and Arthur sighed sadly, “Are you able to get us out Merlin? If you are in fact the most powerful warlock,” Arthur paused, trying to wrap his head around this idea once more, Merlin, his Merlin, the most powerful warlock to walk the earth? He hardly believed it, but after seeing Merlin’s response to having to say it, he knew that at the very least Merlin believed it to be true, “then surely a few bonds in a dungeon should be easy to break.” 

Arthur tried to joke and nudge Merlin’s shoulder playfully.

Merlin shook his head sadly, “They are cold iron, my magic can’t get past them.”

“When I grew up, I learned tales of Emrys,” Percival started hesitantly, “he was said to be the most powerful being to walk the earth. His magic a greater power than any forces that tried to stand against him.” Percival paused and looked meaningfully at Merlin, “If this is all true, then it is my belief that, while most magic wielders may not be able to go against cold iron, that the magic of Emrys can because it is the magic of the earth and can control all forces such as this.”

Arthur looked at Percival with barely concealed shock but nodded in what he hoped looked like agreement. “You said it yourself Merlin, that sorceress was afraid even though she had us all locked up. I bet she, like Percival, believes that if you really put yourself into it, that you can break out of cold iron.”

Merlin frowned, “I’m not sure that I can. But I’ll try.”

Merlin reached out his senses, feeling for the cold iron traces in own bonds. He felt them push back hard against his magic as it probed at it. He screwed his eyes shut in concentration. Focusing on one manacle at a time he pushed his magic hard against the cold iron barrier. It seemed to push back with an equally strong force. Finally, with one more strong push of his magic, he felt the cold iron shift. Pushing again, he felt it slide further back from his own magic. 

Merlin heard a few soft gasps as he felt the first manacle deform around his wrist. When it finally fell off and clattered against the wall, Merlin heard the knights cheering him on. Not wanting to loose concentration, Merlin continued to push against the other one. Now that one wrist was free, the second was much easier. Merlin managed to free his other wrist with relative ease now.

When both arms were free he opened his eyes. Arthur was still sitting only a few feet away. He gasped as he saw Merlin’s eyes and Merlin shrank back again, afraid that Arthur may have changed his mind. 

Arthur saw Merlin flinch at his gasp, and quickly tried to console him. “No, Merlin, I was just surprised. Your eyes, they were so gold. I’ve, I’ve never seen anything like it. It was just...”

Merlin looked back up, his eyes fading back to blue and Arthur just stared for a moment.

Arthur shook his head slightly with a slight smile, “The most powerful warlock on earth and yet you choose to muck out my stables. You could have so much more Merlin.”

“I don’t want any thing more.” Merlin answered quickly.

Arthur continued, “But why? Why Merlin? Why do you do all of this for Camelot? Surely not just because some prophecy told you to. You’ve never been good at following directions.”

Merlin smiled sadly, “I don’t do it for Camelot Arthur, I do it for you. My magic is for you.”

Arthur gasped, “For me? But what have I ever done to deserve that?”

“It is as I said Arthur. You are kind and brave, and compassionate and just even when others wouldn’t be.”

Arthur briefly looked horrified, “The truth serum Merlin, I’m so sorry, I shouldn’t- I didn’t mean to start asking you questions, that wasn’t fair of me.”

Merlin shook his head, “No, you need to hear this now Arthur, so that you know its true. You are the greatest man that I’ve ever met, for all of those reasons and so many more. You are currently an amazing king and you will continue to grow into the greatest king that there has ever been. And even if you weren’t a king, even if you were just a lowly peasant like me, I’d still believe in all of this and I’d still love you for it all.”

Arthur chocked back a gasp, trying not to react to quickly, not wanting to startle Merlin again, but he wasn’t sure if Merlin had even realized what he had just admitted aloud. “You love me?” Arthur asked in a whisper.

Merlin’s eyes went wide and he blushed darkly, “Uh, what I meant was, well the thing is. Listen, I’m sorry Arthur, I uh, I wanted to say that actually...”

Arthur cut him off by laying a gentle sword calloused hand on his cheek, “Guess that truth serum is still working then. But if it is any consolation Merlin, I love you too.”

Merlin froze, “You love me?”

“Yes,” said Arthur calmly, though his insides were doing a flip and his heart was beating faster than it would after doing sprints out in the training field. “and if you don’t believe me, I’ll call Anthea back in here, see if she has any more of that truth serum to use so that you know I’m telling the-”

Arthur was cut off by Merlin crashing forward, colliding his lips in a sloppy kiss that nearly missed Arthur’s mouth entirely. 

Arthur fell back, Merlin landing nearly entirely atop him, he caught himself with his hands. He slowly sat back up, pushing Merlin back into a sitting position on his lap.

As he got his balance beneath him, Arthur began to return the kiss, giving as good as he got. He brought one hand up to wrap around Merlin’s waist, pulling him close against him as Merlin’s legs wrapped around Arthur’s own waist. His other hand went to the back of Merlin’s neck as he tilted his head to find a better angle. 

Merlin’s eyes were screwed shut and he had both arms around Arthur’s neck, clinging onto him for dear life, willing this all to be true, and not just some crazy dream. As Arthur pulled Merlin in closer and deepened the kiss, Merlin moaned into Arthur’s mouth, opening it to invite Arthur in.

Before they could go any further, they were interrupted by a low whistle from Gwaine and an awkward cough from Elyan. Gwaine was smirking mischievously when Merlin and Arthur suddenly broke apart to look at their forgotten crowd. They did not move from their positions on one another but their faces both went pink in embarrassment. Arthur kept his arm possessively around Merlin’s waist causing Merlin to wiggle slightly in his lap.

“I don’t mean to interrupt you love birds,” Gwaine chuckled, “but if you wouldn’t mind letting us down that’d be great. My arms are getting tired, and contrary to popular belief, I’m not particularly fond of being a voyeur.”

Merlin’s face was scarlet and he buried it in Arthur’s neck trying to hide himself from Gwaine’s view along with the rest of the knights, “Shit, sorry,” Merlin murmured, causing Arthur to chuckle, “there,” Merlin waved his hand and the manacles fell off of the knights. 

They all groaned, stretching their limbs and rolling their shoulders. “Now what’s our plan to get out of here?” Leon asked.

Merlin looked up again, “I can take the sorceress, though I bet if she figures out that we’ve escaped she’ll probably just run for it. There’d be no sense in going after her.” 

“Anyone know what she did with our swords?” Elyan asked, all the knights looked around. 

“She left one,” Arthur cringed slightly before saying, “it’s over there near where I was chained up, I think she thought, well, best not to consider that. The rest are probably further out in the keep. Leon, you can grab that sword. Merlin, can you open the door?”

Arthur looked back to Merlin, Merlin shrugged, “Yeah, should be simple enough.” Reluctantly, Merlin stood up and moved away from Arthur. “Step back, this’ll be a bit loud and dangerous.”

All the knights took a step back away from the door. Merlin looked back over his shoulder to Arthur for reassurance. Arthur smiled softly and nodded towards the door in encouragement. 

Merlin breathed deep, then held his hand up towards the door. Without a word he let his magic go and the stone encasing the lock exploded and crumbled away. Without the stone holding it in place, the door swung open and Merlin turned around. The knights cheered, patting Merlin on the back as they rushed towards the door. But Arthur met Merlin’s gaze and stood frozen. 

Merlin’s triumphant smile quickly fell, “Arthur? Was that okay? I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to-”

“Your eyes Merlin,” Arthur interrupted with a shake of his head. “They were glowing again, they’re like nothing I’ve ever seen before.” He took a step closer to Merlin, “They’re so gold,” another step, “so bright,” another step, “so brilliant,” and one more step till he was toe to toe with Merlin, “so gorgeous.”

Merlin was blushing again, he tried to look away but Arthur took hold of his chin and guided his gaze back to his own eyes. “Even when the gold fades, your eyes are still so bright and full of life. I could look into them all day.”

Chuckling softly, which gusted hair over Arthur’s face, shifting his hair lightly, Merlin said, “Are you quite sure you are feeling alright Arthur?”

Arthur just grinned, “Quite. Though I’d feel better if you’d come back here and kiss me again.”

Merlin smirked then and moved till his nose was touching Arthur’s, “Your wish is my command sire.” 

Then Merlin closed the distance once more, wrapping his arms around Arthur’s neck, as Arthur wrapped his own around Merlin’s waist. 

Behind them, through the door, the knights stood, “Should we just leave them to it?” asked Percival.

“Probably for the best yes, they may be a while. Surely between the rest of us, one sorceress won’t be too difficult to manage.” Gwaine smirked, “Besides, I don’t think they’ll even notice that we’ve gone for quite a while.”

Gwaine gestured back at the pair who were too lost in each other to notice the knights watching as Merlin wrapped his legs around Arthur’s waist, and Arthur hoisted him into the air. 

When they both let out soft moans, Leon, who was significantly red in the face, cleared his throat, “Er, yes, well, let’s not waste anymore time here then. Uh, let’s go.”

With his sword pointed down the hall, Leon led the knights to find the sorceress, if she had not fled already, and to gather their belongings, leaving the king and his warlock in the safety of one another’s arms behind them.