Chapter Text
Quinn didn’t know how much time had passed with her sitting on Shelby’s lap, sobbing out every last bit of fear, uncertainty, and guilt she’d been holding onto for far too long—but it felt like hours. Shelby held her and rocked her, singing the same soft melodies she used for Beth as Quinn’s sobs wound down. Now as her tears turned to sniffles and the occasional hiccup, and reality settled around her once more, so did her current position .
At some point during her tears, Quinn had shifted onto her hip to relieve the pressure from her aching bottom. She now sat curled in maternal arms, head resting against Shelby’s chest and legs tucked up and off to the side. It left her punished rear on full display, and Shelby’s hand had since lowered to provide comfort. Despite how safe and loved Quinn felt in this moment, it didn’t stop old worries from creeping back in—and with it, shame.
Shelby frowned as she felt Quinn stiffen in her arms. She looked down in time to see the girl’s face flush enough to rival the color down below. “What’s going through that head of yours?”
Surprised eyes met caring and it was nearly enough to make Quinn emotional all over again. After everything that Quinn did—all the trouble, Shelby spanking her, her tears—for the woman to still look at her as if—as if she were the most precious thing on the planet…it was too much.
“We’ve been up here a really long time. I—I should get up,” Quinn blurted before shifting to do just that. She gasped as her butt hit Shelby’s thighs and reignited the fire from before.
“Hold on,” Shelby said, shifting the girl back onto her side. Her hand returned to quiet embers. “Honey, I want to hold you as long as you want and need me to. Are you really ready to get up or do you only think you have to?”
“I’m not—I’m too old to—”
“You are never too old for comfort, Quinnie,” Shelby insisted.
“But I shouldn’t…It’s already been way too long. And Beth needs you anyway.”
Shelby shook her head and reached out to tilt the girl’s chin up. “Beth is in Zayde’s more-than-capable hands. You are my sole concern right now, baby.”
The teenager sucked in a breath, tears appearing before she could stop them. No one had ever put her first before…no one but Shelby. “I’m sorry…I don’t…I don’t mean to c—cry so much.”
“You cry all you need to, sweetheart. There’s no shame in tears. Not with me,” Shelby soothed, moving to cup a youthful cheek. She brushed a few tears away and then eased the girl’s head back to rest against her chest once more. That had soothed Quinn before and she hoped it would again.
Quinn’s fingers worried at the collar of Shelby’s crewneck as the woman’s heart beat against her ear, a steady thump-thump slowing her own heartbeat to match. “I—I cried all over your shirt,” she sniffled.
Shelby chuckled, its vibrations rumbling against Quinn’s cheek. “Beth’s done worse, believe me,” she teased, running fingers through blonde locks.
“Yeah, but Beth’s a baby ,” Quinn said even as she relaxed further into Shelby’s soothing touch.
“And you’re my baby,” Shelby answered.
***
Jacob Corcoran watched on in silence as his daughter sent his newly-acquired granddaughter upstairs to change and then wait for her upcoming punishment. Quinn hesitated for a moment and Jacob could feel the girl’s eyes on him. He knew she was embarrassed and so he made a point not to look at her and focus on Beth instead. He waited until the girl was past him before flicking his eyes up. He caught her retreating up the stairs like a woman off to meet her maker. He felt for her, remembering all-too-well his own childhood punishments.
Turning his attention to his daughter, he wasn’t surprised to see her looking just as forlorn as Quinn. He remembered that side of things, too, and didn’t envy Shelby her task.
“How did you and Mama do it?” Shelby asked, her shoulders slumping.
Jacob met his daughter’s eyes, so much like his late wife’s, and smiled sadly. “It was always what you needed,” he answered honestly.
Shelby drew in a deep breath, then let it out slowly. “Okay. Guess I should go get this over with.”
“Good luck, sweetheart,” Jacob said, stepping forward to place a hand on his daughter’s shoulder. He squeezed gently and then nudged her forward. “Go take care of our girl.”
“Thanks, Dad. See you in a little while, Bethie.” Shelby leaned in to kiss her infant’s head and then waved to both as she left.
“Alright, Bitsie,” Jacob began in a happier tone, “what say you and I find a book to read for a bit? How does that sound?”
“DA!” Beth squealed.
“I agree!”
Jacob returned to the sofa where he and Beth had been sitting and playing with her stacking cups when Shelby and Quinn returned home. Several board books sat on the coffee table and he reached for the top one. Tucking the girl to sit upright in his arms, he opened the colorful board book and began to read.
‘The witch had a cat, and a hat that was black…’
They’d gotten two pages in before Beth began to fuss. Jacob sighed as he caught sight of the time—it was Beth’s nap time. He had wanted to stay downstairs with the infant while Shelby and Quinn dealt with things on the top floor. Beth had other plans.
“Okay, I hear you, sweetheart,” the man said as he put the book down. Scooping the infant up, he made his way upstairs.
Jacob made his granddaughter a bottle and then carried her to the nursery to feed her. His ears picked up on the tell-tale sounds of a spanking happening before they were even half-way up the stairs.
“You wo—Ouch! Ouch , Mama! You won’t h—have to!” Quinn squealed and Jacob’s ears perked up. As painful as it was to hear the girl’s sharp cries, he was glad for the sweet title of ‘Mama’ falling from her lips. That girl needed a mama that would love her—and she had her, in Shelby.
Beth wiggled and fussed in his arms, rooting for her bottle she knew was nearby. “Shh, shh, shh, Beth,” Jacob quieted the infant, not wanting to draw attention to themselves—not that he thought either Shelby or Quinn would really hear them over their own racket.
The worst of the noise was drowned out as soon as they were safely ensconced in the nursery, for which Jacob Corcoran was grateful. It had been hard enough on him as a father having to dole out a spanking to Shelby when she was growing up—harder still whenever he’d overheard Sally doing it, followed by Shelby’s pained cries echoing behind closed doors. But nothing prepared him for how hard it was now as a grandfather, having to listen to his baby punish hers .
Beth was out like a light after only a few sips of her bottle. Easing up from the glider, Jacob laid the baby in her crib, his fingers ghosting over little blonde curls. “Sleep well, darling,” he whispered before turning to make his exit.
The grandfather winced as he stepped back out into the hall and heard the sharp, unmistakable cracks of a firm palm falling against bare skin. He had hoped it’d be over, but at least they were in the final stretch of it now.
Leaving them to it, Jacob made his way to the kitchen. He was in desperate need of some coffee and he suspected both mother and child would be ready for a hot cup of tea when they re-emerged in a little while—and maybe a few homemade cookies, if Jacob worked quickly.
***
The rich aroma of coffee and vanilla hit her senses as soon as Shelby opened the door to her bedroom and ushered Quinn out ahead of her. The girl gave an appreciative hum and Shelby chuckled.
“It seems Zayde has been busy getting ready to spoil you, Little Miss,” she mused.
Quinn’s eyebrows knit as she spun to meet Shelby’s eyes. “Why? I haven’t done anything to earn—”
“You called him Zayde and that’s such a wonderful gift you gave him, sweetheart,” Shelby said, cupping Quinn’s cheek briefly. “But even if you didn’t, you’re his grandchild—and that is all the reason he’ll ever need.”
“The gifts!” Quinn remembered with a gasp. “Mama, it’s Christmas Eve! I’ve got to wrap presents!” The teen did an about-face, intending to rush off to her bedroom. She didn’t get very far.
“Whoa!” Shelby exclaimed, catching a fistful of the girl’s shirt and tugging her backwards. “There’s plenty of time for that, Quinnie. For now, let’s go visit with Zayde, okay?”
Jacob had just gotten the last batch of chocolate chip cookies out of the oven when he heard Shelby’s door opening upstairs. There was a brief conversation (about what, the man couldn’t make out), and then two sets of feet were plodding down the stairs towards him. Shelby appeared first, offering him a grateful smile as she met his eyes, with Quinn following close behind.
“Those smell amazing , Dad,” she said as way of greeting. “Where’s Beth?”
“Asleep in her crib the last twenty minutes or so. She was tuckered,” Jacob answered, not missing the way Quinn’s face turned beet red. He pretended not to notice and turned to grab the kettle from the stove instead.
Shelby didn’t miss it either and ran her hand down Quinn’s back as she guided the girl closer to the island where her father had set out a plate of warm cookies. Grabbing one, she passed it off to Quinn with a kiss to the girl’s temple as she continued on to the fridge.
Quinn nibbled at the warm, gooey treat and watched the adults bustle around her. Both were acting as if nothing out-of-the-ordinary had occurred in the last thirty-six hours let alone the past thirty minutes—as if Quinn having her butt lit up enough to rival Rudolph’s nose wasn’t a big deal. And maybe to them , it wasn’t. Was it a big deal to Quinn? The girl pondered that as her free hand reached down to give a brief rub.
Shelby set Quinn’s special mug in front of her, perfectly made just the way she liked it. The girl met loving hazel eyes with a smile. And as Zayde carried his own mug filled with steaming coffee to join them, Quinn met his kind face too. In that moment, she decided it really didn’t matter that Zayde knew and had even heard some of her spanking. It was over and they were all moving on.
***
By 8:30 that evening, Quinn lay curled on the sofa, head resting on a pillow in Shelby’s lap as the woman ran gentle fingers through hair still damp from her earlier shower. Zayde sat on the love seat, the twinkling lights on the tree and the glow from the tv the only illumination in the room as the three watched A Christmas Story on TBS . A small pile of silver and gold wrapped presents glinted under the tree, ready and waiting for Christmas morning.
Quinn yawned and rubbed her eyes, snuggling deeper into the throw pillow as she let out a long sigh. Shelby smoothed her hand over Quinn’s hair, brushing it back from her face. “I think it’s time for a certain little girl to go to bed,” she mused.
“Mama!” Quinn gasped, immediately dropping the fisted hand that had been knuckling at her eyes to glare up at the woman instead. “It’s too early!”
“Look at you,” Shelby smiled indulgently, “You’re fighting sleep.”
“I’m not!” Quinn whined, sitting up. She hissed as her bottom protested the swift move and blushed at Shelby’s knowing smirk. “The movie’s barely even started!” she added with a pout.
“It’s playing on a twenty-four-hour loop. There’s plenty of time to watch it tomorrow,” Shelby answered as she nudged the girl to stand. She followed suit. “Besides, Santa can’t come if you’re awake. Say goodnight to Zayde.”
Quinn huffed, earning her several encouraging pats from her mama—firm enough to rouse dwindling embers that still held enough heat to catch fire if prodded. “Goodnight, Zayde,” she relented with a sigh.
Jacob groaned as he stood, his knees creaking in protest. He felt his sixty-five years more on some days than others, and today was one of those days. He opened his arms to the girl and smiled when she moved into them. “Goodnight, Quinnie. Sweet dreams,” he murmured, kissing her head. Pulling back, he caressed the teenager’s cheek. “Listen to your mama now—off to bed with you.” He turned the child around and nudged her towards her mother, catching Shelby’s eyes over a blonde head as he did. He winked and Shelby beamed.
Quinn trudged over to Shelby and gave her a sulky look. “It’s even earlier than my early bedtime I had when I was grounded ,” she whined. It was immediately followed by a big, traitorous yawn that all-but unhinged her jaw and made her eyes water.
Shelby simply shook her head and quirked an amused eyebrow as she pointed in the direction of the stairs. “Go brush your teeth and wash your face. I’ll be right up,” she said.
The teenager sighed and slunk past Shelby, quickening her pace when a maternal hand provided incentive. She threw a pout over her shoulder when she was well out of range and mounted the stairs while rubbing her bottom. “Go to my room when you’re finished, Quinn!” Shelby’s voice called after her. Quinn’s stomach dropped as if she’d missed a step and her heart rate picked up. Had she gone too far with her pouting? Not wanting to upset Shelby further, Quinn hightailed it to her bedroom.
Five minutes later, Quinn found herself pacing Shelby’s room just as she had four-and-a-half hours earlier when she’d been sent to wait for her spanking. She wondered if the same was true now—if Shelby was planning to add more heat to her fire for her continued whining downstairs.
Unaware of her daughter’s plight upstairs, Shelby spent several minutes seeing her father off and then brought up the Santa presents she’d been hiding in the storage room downstairs. Laying them out around the tree, she stood back and admired the sight for a moment. She then made sure everything was locked up, turned out the lights, and went to join Quinn for bed.
Five minutes turned to ten and then fifteen, and still no sign of Shelby. Quinn’s pacing became frantic, sure that she was going to find herself back over her mama’s lap for arguing as she had. So when the door finally opened and Shelby stepped inside, Quinn let out a startled yelp and spun to face the woman.
Before she could lose her nerve or, worse still, Shelby could haul her over to the bed, Quinn rushed to say the words she’d been practicing during her long wait. “I’m sorry I whined and didn’t listen to you downstairs! I didn’t even mean it, I—I was playing—but I know I went too far and know I deserve to be in trouble again after everything else I did, but I am sorry, Mama. I’m sorry and I won’t do it again and—I’m still really sore from the first time. Please don’t spank me again, Mama, please.” Tears swam in her eyes by the end and she couldn’t help clamping her hands over her bottom defensively. Her heart pounded as she waited for her mother’s answer, praying she’d be given a reprieve.
Brows furrowed, Shelby blinked and stared at her child for a long moment as her brain caught up to the girl’s words. “W—What? Honey, what are you—You’re not in trouble,” she said when it did.
It was Quinn’s turn to blink and stare, dumbfounded. “But I was whiny and argued and you swatted me to get upstairs and then told me to come wait for you in here. You made me do the same thing earlier when you spanked me, so I thought—”
“Oh, Quinnie,” Shelby sighed, moving to close the distance between them. She wrapped the girl up in a fierce hug. Quinn clung to her, scared and hurting, and the mother’s heart ached as she thought back to all the other times this poor child thought one thing when Shelby always meant another.
As far as they had come in the last nine weeks, Quinn still walked on eggshells at times, always expecting the worst and assuming that’s the only thing she deserved. Naively, Shelby had thought the spanking today had changed things. Quinn was much more relaxed today, seeming to bounce back to her usual self in a way that she hadn’t during her grounding. The girl had laughed and joked with Shelby and her father all afternoon, was lively at dinner despite her near-constant squirming in her seat, and hadn’t hesitated with her childlike whining about bedtime that Shelby had found so adorable. The mother had taken all of that as a good sign that this was a turning point for them (and maybe it was), but despite all of the progress, they still had a long way to go.
Pulling back now to stare into misty hazel eyes, Shelby tried to convey all of the love she felt for this child in that look. “I’m sorry me sending you in here made you think you were in trouble again, honey. I will send you here whenever you earn a spanking, but I don’t want that to be your only association with my room. I want this to be a safe place for you, as well. You can always come to my room when you’re scared or hurting or just want to be held. Okay?”
“O—kay,” Quinn frowned. “But why am I here now, then?”
Shelby smiled and reached out to cup her daughter’s cheek. “Because it’s bedtime. C’mon.” Her hand lowered to wrap around Quinn’s waist and settle on the small of her back, pushing the girl forward. Quinn didn’t fight it and Shelby pulled the blankets back and then nodded at Quinn to get in. The girl sighed and hooked her fingers in the waistband of her sweatpants, letting the heavy material fall to the floor. Hands went to soothe tender skin one last time before the blonde climbed into bed and settled on her stomach.
The mother’s eyes flicked down to inspect the upturned bottom before her. Gone was any sign of the hot, red skin she’d left there earlier, though she knew from experience that did nothing to dull the lingering ache pale cheeks kept hidden. Lowering her own hand to offer what relief she could, Shelby leaned in to kiss Quinn’s temple before pulling the blankets up to the girl’s shoulders. She offered one more kiss before standing up and saying she’d be back after she got herself ready for bed. Quinn hummed in response, snuggling further into the bed’s softness as her eyes closed. She was asleep instantly.
***
Shelby’s excitement was at an all-time high come Christmas morning. She’d been awake since 4:45 and crept out of bed, taking the baby monitor with her as she made her way downstairs. She’d gotten a pot of coffee started and then went to turn on the tree lights and set the atmosphere for when the girls got up.
Beth woke at her usual time just after 6. Shelby had changed her wet diaper and dressed her in an adorable ‘My First Christmas’ onesie with red and green striped pants before whisking her away to the kitchen for a bottle and some mashed bananas. She then entertained Beth with her stacking cups on the floor in the living room while they waited for Quinn to wake up.
By 6:40, Shelby was buzzing with energy. She’d texted her dad several minutes ago to see if he was up and he called her not long after. With him now on the way, Shelby scooped her youngest up and tickled her tummy as they headed for the stairs. “Let’s go wake Sissy,” she said.
Quinn groaned when she felt the bed dip beside her and again when tiny hands began fisting the back of her shirt to get closer. Shifting carefully, Quinn brought Beth around to lay next to her and wrapped her arm around the seventh-month-old. “It’s sleepy time, Bethie,” she whispered as she kissed the baby’s head.
“Mamama,” Beth babbled, reaching a hand out to place on Quinn’s face.
Quinn jerked slightly (Beth wasn’t gentle) and cracked her right eye open to stare at her. “Shh. Sleep,” she grumbled affectionately.
“MA!” Beth said with purpose and reached for a tangle of blonde hair. Little fingers got a good grip and yanked and Beth squealed.
“ Ow, Beth!” Quinn hissed, both eyes popping open as her hand flew to detach the tiny fist from her hair. “Mama!” she shrieked when Beth gave it another good pull. It was hard enough that it brought tears to the teen’s eyes.
Shelby had been watching the sweet moment between her daughters with a full heart when the scene turned south in the blink of an eye. Beth had snatched Quinn’s hair and pulled so quickly, there hadn’t been time for Shelby to react. Quinn’s hand then shot up to try to remove it but Beth wasn’t letting go. Shelby’s own hand joined the fray just before Quinn yelped and cried out for her.
“No, Beth. Oh, Quinnie. Hang on. Beth, let go .” When Shelby was finally able to extricate Beth’s hand from Quinn’s hair, she lifted the baby to sit in her lap. Taking the girl’s hand, she placed her own over it and then smacked herself. The noise alone was enough to startle Beth, but coupled with Shelby’s firm “No, Elizabeth—Ouch,” made her cry.
Shelby cradled her upset child and rocked them as she made gentle shushing sounds. She met the older set of hazel eyes and offered a sad smile. “I’m sorry, baby. That’s not exactly the wake-up call I was imagining,” she said as she leaned forward to rub the spot that Beth had hurt.
“It’s okay, she didn’t mean it,” Quinn answered, her eyes closing at the gentle touch.
“No, but she’s old enough to start learning.” Shelby placed a kiss to Beth’s head and then sat her daughter up. Taking the infant’s hand, she brought it back to Quinn’s hair (being extra mindful of little fingers). Quinn’s eyes shot open and met Shelby’s gaze with a flash of panic. It was gone as quickly as it came and the girl noticeably relaxed under her mama’s steady presence.
“Gentle hands, Bethie, see?” Shelby guided Beth’s hand over the teenager’s hair a few times while offering praise. “Yes, we’re nice to Sissy.”
Teenage eyes widened in surprise and wonder at the new title bestowed upon her. That name, more than anything else, more than Shelby’s use of ‘Quinnie’, ‘baby’, or ‘daughter’—more than Quinn calling the woman ‘Mama’—cemented Quinn into this family in a way none of the others had.
Meeting those eyes now, Shelby smiled at her oldest. “Up you get, Quinnie,” she said, throwing the covers off the girl as she and Beth stood up. “Zayde’s on his way over, so hurry up. We’ll open presents as soon as he gets here!”
Quinn groaned but sat up and rubbed the sleep from her eyes. She shrieked as she was pelted with her own sweatpants and yanked them off her face in time to see Shelby flee, her giggles echoing down the hall.
When Quinn entered the living room several minutes later, the sight before her was enough to take her breath away. And for the briefest of moments, she found herself thinking that Santa really had come during the night. The stockings were stuffed to the brim (even Shelby’s!), and in front of the tree sat two heaping piles of presents for both Beth and Quinn.
The teenager’s eyes swept over to Shelby, who was watching her with bated breath and waiting for her reaction. A broad smile broke out on Quinn’s face as she made her way over to the woman. Shelby set Beth on the carpet where her stacking cups were scattered and then opened her arms for Quinn.
“I love you,” the teen whispered as she flung her arms around Shelby’s neck and held on tight.
Shelby drew a shaky breath—this was the first time Quinn had ever initiated those three little words. “I love you ,” she managed, her voice thick with emotion.
“It’s too much—” Quinn began, letting out a small, undignified squeak as her bottom was given unwanted attention. “Wait, you didn’t let me finish!” she whined as her hand fell to block any further correction. “It’s too much, but thank you—for everything.”
Shelby let out a bark of a laugh and shook her head as she pulled back to meet her teenager’s face. She leveled the girl with an amused smirk before rolling her eyes. “ You’re too much,” she teased. She had just begun to step back from their hug when her words registered in her own mind and she all but yanked Quinn into her arms again.
“I didn’t mean that the way it sounded!” Shelby hurried to explain before her words had time to warp themselves inside the teenager’s brain. “You’re always going on about it being ‘too much’, so I was just teasing about you being too much. You are perfect and I love every bit of you. You are not too much—and certainly not in a bad way—do you understand?”
Quinn was pretty sure she was just given whiplash from how quickly Shelby pulled her back into her arms—and that was nothing compared to the dizzying words now being directed at her. “Wha—Ma, I—”
“I’m sorry, baby. I didn’t mean it—I’ll work on being more aware of how I word things. Please don’t—”
“Mama!” Quinn interrupted the woman’s rambling. She squirmed enough to loosen Shelby’s grip and managed to step back from their embrace. “I know you were teasing,” she said simply.
It was Shelby’s turn to be thrown for a loop. Not that she wasn’t glad to hear that, but she thought for sure Quinn would take her words the wrong way and then worry herself sick over them like she had the night before (and on Wednesday and like she did with her ongoing concern about the groceries and—)
“You do?” she asked, skeptical. “Are you sure, honey, because I don’t want you to—”
“I know, Mama,” Quinn assured.
Shelby sighed and nodded, reaching out to cup Quinn’s cheek. Her thumb grazed the smooth skin as she stared into hazel eyes. “Okay, sweetheart,” she relented. “But the next time you’re unsure about something I’ve said or done, let’s talk about it, okay? Promise me.”
“I promise,” Quinn agreed.
“Okay,” Shelby said, leaning in to kiss Quinn’s forehead. “C’mon, there’s one present I want you to open now. The rest will have to wait until Zayde’s here,” she added, motioning for the girl to have a seat while she went to grab the gold-wrapped box.
Beth was still happily playing with her toys, so Shelby left her to it and went to sit next to her older child. Placing the box in Quinn’s lap, she smiled and gave a small nod for the teen to open it. Quinn did so very delicately.
Setting the paper to the side, Quinn lifted the top off the box and gasped at what she saw inside. She traced her finger over the ornament, a fireplace mantle with three stockings hanging from it, one each for ‘Mama’ , ‘Quinnie’ , and ‘Beth’— and written at the top, the words ‘Our First Christmas 2010’ . Flicking her gaze up to Shelby, she had to blink to clear her vision. Shelby offered her a warm smile as she reached for Quinn’s free hand and squeezed it.
“I bought this the same day you got Beth that ‘Baby’s First Christmas ornament’ , when I sent you to change her in the family restroom,” the mother explained. “I wanted to commemorate our first Christmas together, too.”
Tears were swimming in Quinn’s eyes and she was pulled into a fierce hug. She sniffled as Shelby rubbed circles on her back. The doorbell rang then and both jumped at the sudden noise. Shelby pulled back first, offering a sheepish grin as she wiped several tears from Quinn’s face.
“Go put that on the tree while I let Zayde in,” she directed, helping the girl up and then sending her along with a maternal pat.
“Merry Christmas, family!” Jacob Corcoran greeted as soon as the door opened. He was holding several large presents in his hands, along with a smaller one on top. “Found this one on the porch—I’m assuming it’s for Quinn,” he added as he stepped inside.
Quinn had hung the new ornament on the tree already and then scooped up Beth on her way back to the sofa. Brows knit, she craned her neck to get a better look at the mystery porch gift.
“ Me? But who would…” She trailed off as Shelby brought the beautifully wrapped present over and swapped Beth for it on the teen’s lap.
“Open it and find out,” she encouraged.
Zayde set his own packages down and then shrugged out of his jacket as he came to sit on the loveseat.
Quinn’s fingers traced the ribbon adorning the gift—she knew at once who it was from. Her heart thudded inside her chest as she shakily pulled at one end of the bow to undo it. Hooking her finger under one of the perfectly-folded flaps, she popped the tape and then easily slid the box out. The teen drew a shaky breath before lifting the lid. Hidden beneath red tissue paper was a small envelope with her name written in her biological mother’s neat hand. Lifting it, her eyes fell on the porcelain rocking horse and teddy bear—her baby ornament. She choked out a sob.
Shelby passed Beth to her father and then she was up and moving to Quinn’s side, pulling the girl into her arms before she had fully sat down. Quinn buried her face in her adopted mother’s shoulder and Shelby knew the girl was crying despite her silence. She rocked them and let Quinn calm down on her own.
When she did, the girl pulled back and cast hesitant eyes on Shelby and then Zayde. “I—I’m sorry,” she offered with burning cheeks. She then hung her head as she began to chew on her bottom lip, ashamed of crying so much this morning already—she hadn’t even been up a full hour yet!
Hooking a finger under the girl’s chin, Shelby tilted Quinn’s face up to meet her gaze. “You never have to apologize for your tears, sweetheart,” she said gently, once again wiping tears from Quinn’s cheeks. She then cupped her face as she leaned in to offer a kiss to her forehead. As she pulled back, she whispered, “Do you want to put that one on the tree now, too?”
Quinn nodded and lifted the ornament out of the box, leaving the note for now—she wasn’t ready to read whatever was in there. Shelby echoed her nod and then they stood at the same time. Her mama’s hand provided steady comfort at the small of her back as they walked towards the tree together. She found a spot near Beth’s ornament and hung her own there.
“Perfect,” Shelby whispered for her ears only as she rubbed her hand up and down Quinn’s back. Quinn turned to give her a watery smile.
Beth screeched from her perch in her grandfather’s arms, her attention on the pile of presents in front of the tree. “Mamamama,” she babbled, her little eyebrows furrowed in anger.
“Okay, Beth, we hear you,” Shelby told her infant as she turned towards her youngest. “Let’s open presents!”
***
By the time the last present had been unwrapped, Quinn was no longer the only one who had cried that morning. Shelby shed quite a few when she opened the necklace Quinn had picked out for her. She pulled the girl into a side hug and then handed the necklace over so Quinn could fasten it around her neck. “I love it, Quinnie—thank you,” she had said as her fingers traced the hearts delicately.
Quinn had caught sight of Zayde watching the scene playing out before him and hadn’t missed the glassy sheen to his own eyes. He had winked at the girl when he met her gaze and then handed over his present for her. It turned out to be the complete set of Harry Potter books. Quinn knew it had been expensive and wanted to protest, but she couldn’t bring herself to do so—not with the way the man was beaming at her. “You mentioned that you were never allowed to read them before but always wanted to—now you can,” he had said. Quinn was touched that he had remembered and given her such a thoughtful gift. Her cheeks reddened as she gave him her own gift, regretting that it wasn’t as meaningful. Zayde had smiled when he unwrapped it and immediately stood to don the fleece sweater. “This is wonderful, Quinnie. And red is my favorite color,” he told her as he moved to hug her.
Beth cried the most when Shelby had started to clean up all of the discarded wrapping paper, so much so that the mother had let it go and let her infant continue to occupy herself with the colorful scraps.
Quinn was left alone with her thoughts as the adults went to start on breakfast. Her eyes fell on the envelope that she never opened and she leaned forward to grab it. She turned it over in her hands and chewed at her lip as she worked up the courage to face whatever was inside. Taking a deep breath, Quinn untucked the flap. Trembling fingers fumbled to pull the folded note out. Her heart pounded as she opened it fully.
My Darling Quinnie,
Words alone cannot express how sorry I am for all of the pain you’ve suffered at the hands of your “family”. I wasn’t able to protect you from your father and I know you carry so much pain from his actions—and my inactions. Not a day goes by that I don’t wish I had done things differently, that I had been stronger for you. I’m sorry I failed you as a mother, my darling.
You are so strong, Quinnie. I am proud of the woman you are turning out to be. You will go far in this life now that you have a family that deserves you. Shelby loves you so much, sweetheart. Don’t be afraid to let her in.
Always keep your head held high and never, ever look back. You are finally where you belong.
I love you, Lucy Quinn.
Love,
Mom
P.S. Shelby—Thank you for giving Quinn everything I never could. I may have given birth to her, but you are her real mother.
Quinn knew she was crying, and for once, she didn’t care. She wasn’t going to be ashamed of these tears. These were happy tears—freeing tears—tears that had the power to wash away the past and make room for a new beginning.
“Quinnie! Breakfast is ready! Grab your sister for me?” Shelby called from the kitchen.
“Coming, Mama!” Quinn answered as she scooped Beth up. The teenager smiled as she made her way towards the kitchen and her family. She was home and exactly where she belonged.