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He came out of nowhere in the middle of the night.
Baz and I were asleep, as we usually are in the middle of the night, when suddenly I was awoken by some strange rattling at the window. I thought maybe it was a bird, or something of a similar sort.
Imagine my surprise when I look out the window and there’s a full grown man staring into our room.
My wings are spread and my tail thrashing before I’m even fully out of the bed, completely ready to protect Baz if need be, but the man doesn’t move, just stares.
But, you can’t exactly call him a man. When I get a closer look at him, he looks distinctly non-human. He has what looks like black bat’s ears on his head, and leathery wings of his own that appear to grow out of his arms. I reach over for the Excalibur slowly, just in case he is truthfully a threat.
Just then, the window unlatches for some odd reason and when he enters the room, I know he’s not human. He’s over 10 feet tall and he has to crouch severely in order to be able to fit in our bedroom. I hear Baz stir behind me, before he’s suddenly in front of me, putting himself between me and the…creature.
It smiles.
“Good day, gentlemen.” It says, twirling it’s cartoonishly villain mustache. My jaw drops. “No need to feel alarmed, I’m here on friendly business.”
I move up to stand next to Baz, Excalibur firmly held in my hand. “And what business is that?”
“Why, do either of you know a Shepard Love?” It smiles, displaying what looks like rows upon rows of sharp teeth. I swallow and Baz nods. It laughs and I think it’s supposed to be joyous, but I feel as though I’m listening to nails on a chalkboard. I can see Baz wince in my periphery.
“What’s Shep got to do with anything?” I ask.
“Oh! I have the most wondrous news!” It says, pulling out a scroll from its trousers. It unrolls the scroll, before clearing its throat. “You are humbly invited to the wedding of Shepard Love and Penelope Bunce.”
I stare back at it in shock. Is this a fucking joke?
“And you specifically, my dear boy,” it addresses to me, “are invited as the best man! How darling!”
My brows crease in confusion and Baz looks even more lost. The creature just stares back at us, an uneasy smile on its face. It starts to look uncomfortable.
“I take it you…don’t want to attend?” It asks and it almost seems sad.
“No, no! We’re coming!” I add quickly. It smiles again.
“Lovely! I will let the Loves know that you’re going to be there. Ta ta, gentlemen!” It shouts as it goes back out the window, closing and latching it.
And then I watch as it promptly falls to the ground.
I rush to the window, to see what has happened to our…new friend, and watch it hit the ground, and jump. He lands on top of the roof closest to us looking no worse for wear. I feel even more confused than I had earlier.
I turn back to Baz and he doesn’t look like he understands it much either. I sigh.
“Do you believe…him?” I ask. Baz shakes his head.
“I’m not sure, but I wouldn’t put it behind Shepard to know him.” He sighs, before taking my hand. “What I do know is that we should go back to sleep. Talk to Bunce in the morning.”
I smile softly, before putting the Excalibur down and following Baz back to bed. We both lay down, snuggling in. I wrap my arms and wings around him, like I always do. He sighs contentedly and purrs, as he always does.
We fall asleep knowing full well the other is safe.
____________________________________
We call Penny the next morning.
“Hi Pen!”
“Hello Simon!” I smile when I hear her voice over the phone. Baz comes over and hands me a mug of my morning tea. I give him a kiss.
“Hey, uhm, I had something to ask.” I say, taking a sip of my tea.
“I’m an open well of answers.” I hear Shepard snort on the other side of the call. “What’s up?”
“You and Shepard wouldn’t have happened to have sent someone over last night, would you?” I ask. I hear Shepard ask to have the phone.
“What’d they look like?” He asks, as soon as Penny hands it over.
“He was sort of demonic looking, but he also kind of looked like an esteemed gentlemen or something? He had a mustache, and then weird bat like wing thingies…And some really impressive jumping skills.” I hear Shepard laugh.
“Yup! That’s Spring-Heeled Jack!” I nearly drop my phone.
“Wait…like, the guy who was ripping those maiden’s clothes off and making people crash carriages and shit centuries ago?” I ask, completely dumb-founded.
“Yeahhhh, he’s had a bit of a change of heart these past couple centuries. He wants to be good now. Naturally, he and I became friends.” Shep suddenly gasps. “Oh yeah! Did he deliver his message?”
“That you and Penny are getting married? Yeah, he delivered it.”
“Ah, yeah. Sorry about that man, but he’s kinda nocturnal. Not the type to be seen around during the day. And he likes going in through windows, it’s just kinda his schtick.” I nearly laugh at the absurdity of all of this, but I refrain.
“Oh, cool! No…uh, no problem, man. I’ll talk to you later?”
“Talk to you later!” I can hear him smiling through the phone.
“Oh! And congrats! From the both of us!” I smile back, before saying goodbye and hanging up.
I look over at Baz who is currently side eyeing me. I attempt raising one eyebrow and almost do it right. I’ve been practicing.
“What?” I ask. “It’s totally not weird to send a cryptid wanted for murder to invite your friends to your wedding, obviously.” Baz laughs and I smile.
“Totally not weird at all.” He says, taking my hand and interlacing our fingers.
“Totally,” I kiss his cheek.