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Language:
English
Series:
Part 2 of Genshin Snippets
Stats:
Published:
2022-12-07
Words:
590
Chapters:
1/1
Comments:
4
Kudos:
32
Bookmarks:
1
Hits:
477

Doubt Comes In

Summary:

Sometimes all it takes is one person.

Notes:

Title comes from the Hadestown song “Doubt Comes In”

Work Text:

Barbara could feel the slight ache in her legs as she stood at the dais, watching the people of Mondstadt mill around the cathedral as the service came to a close.

The cheering and clapping for her final performance had ended, and now began the long and slow process of everyone leaving.

Soft organ music played from behind her as she spoke candidly with the congregation members who lingered, nothing but awe and praise for her as they spoke.

But she couldn’t help but feel the doubt creeping into her mind, like a small creature crawling up her spine whispering in her ear.

Was she really helping people like this? Was she really going to be able to heal with some singing and dancing?

There were so many people, people like Anna or Glory, that no matter how hard she tried to heal or prayed for they simply wouldn’t get better. Or if they did heal, it never seemed to stick, and the sickness returned shortly afterwards.

Even as she looked down at the smiling and adoring faces of her fans, she couldn’t help but feel inadequate.

Here she was, failing, while her big sister Jean was out there, actually helping people and saving lives and defending Mondstadt as the Dandelion Knight. Acting Grandmaster of the Knights of Favonius, a hero who exhausted herself as she worked every day and night to keep the peace of Mondstadt. Ever reliable and steadfast even in the face of the worst storms the world could throw at her.

Barbara felt as though some days she could barely keep herself afloat. It was like being a pendulum being swung by Lord Barbatos. Some days, it was like she was walking above the problems over the world, like she was making a difference. Other days… Other days she felt as though she was only making things worse. Giving people a false hope that it would get better. Trying to maintain a promise she felt barely capable of fulfilling even on her best days.

Perhaps it would be best if she-

“Miss Barbara?”

“Hm? Ah- Susie! It’s good to see you again!” She put on her best, most dazzling smile. “Is there something I could help you with?”

Please say yes. Barbara desperately needed for her to say yes.

“Yes-” YES “-I’m afraid I was a bit clumsy yesterday. After I was finished praying to Lord Barbatos, and I was headed down the steps and I tripped and twisted my ankle.” Susie looked a touch embarrassed. “I figured it would be fine if I kept it elevated over night but the pain has only gotten worse and I was hoping you would be able to spare a few moments to heal me?” Susie’s face was flushed but Barbara couldn’t help but feel her own smile grow and feel more real on her face.

“I would be more than happy to!”

This was it. This is was she loved. Helping people. Actually helping people, and seeing her magic actually work wonders.

Barbara left the dais with a quick hop down to Susie’s level.

“Lets go sit on that pew over there, I don’t want to make you walk more than you already have.” She said, guiding Susie to the front row pew. The Cathedral was empty except for a few remaining sisters and lingering worshipers lost in their own prayers.

She could feel the elemental magic flowing underneath her skin, ready to be used. Ready to Help.

There was nothing more thrilling or soul lifting than this.

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