Archive of Our Own ^beta

The truth is, Soonyoung should come to terms with the fact that he’s a terrible drinker.  

Just a few glasses of soju and here he is, sprawled on the couch, head heavy and eyes about to close, trying to figure out how he did end up there, when just a few seconds ago he was busy giving his best dance performance on the small coffee table in the middle of the room. Also, why is the room spinning?  

“Because you can’t drink.”  

Soonyoung turns his head – bad idea – to find Wonwoo seated on his very same couch, in a very similar position, only with his head reclined back and his eyes completely closed. Wonwoo can say whatever he wants, but he’s no better than Soonyoung, when it comes to drinking. Okay, maybe he doesn’t dance on tables or speak his thoughts out loud without realizing, but these are mere details.  

“Where are the others?” he asks, since he’s not so far gone to not remember that there was somebody who was hollering at him while he danced, and somebody else who apparently decided to grace their ears with all the latest girl groups songs – Seungkwan? probably Seungkwan – and none of those people were Wonwoo, because he just doesn’t do any of these things, not even when he drinks too much.  

“Went to sleep. Crawling.”  

There’s a small smile on Wonwoo’s face, he’s probably remembering the scene of the others’ retreat.  

“So, it’s just the two of us?”  

“Mh.”  

It’s something to be proud of. Maybe he can’t hold his liquor as well as other members, maybe he gets a little over-enthusiastic when he’s drunk and has the tendency to get louder and touchier, but, tonight, Kwon Soonyoung didn’t crawl back to his bed.  

“We’re the last men standing, Wonwoo-yah,” he whispers, “just like Super Junior.”  

A laugh erupts from Wonwoo’s lips, one of those silent ones when his nose scrunches up. Soonyoung smiles in return, even when he gets his arm punched.  

“Oh, shut up.” Wonwoo is now looking at him, still shaking silently. “Don’t make me laugh, it hurts.”  

Soonyoung smiles more widely. Sometimes it feels so rewarding, talking to Wonwoo. He always smiles, even laughs, whenever Soonyoung cracks a joke – well, sometimes he does so even when he’s being serious, but, again, details. He scoots closer to Wonwoo to lay the head on his shoulder, discovering that, in this position, the room isn’t spinning anymore. Wonwoo makes an annoyed noise and shrugs his shoulder trying to make him move, with no result, so he sighs and leaves him be.  

“My head hurts less like this.” Soonyoung explains nonetheless, even though he knows he has won. Wonwoo mumbles something and shifts a bit to better accommodate his head. “Did you catch my dance, earlier? It was pretty damn good.” Soonyoung doesn’t remember shit of his dance, but he’s quite sure it was.  

“No, I think I was busy playing games with... somebody?” Soonyoung raises his head to look at Wonwoo’s pensive, drunk face. “Mingyu? There was a lot of screaming, so maybe Dokyeom was there too.”  

“Somebody was screaming at my dancing, too, maybe the clamor was from there? That’s how I know it was good.”  

“They were probably yelling at you to stop.”  

For one second, Soonyoung lets himself enjoy the image of Wonwoo’s mouth forming a grin, then delivers his punishment by pinching hard his forearm, proceeding to grab it right after with both his arms to prevent any retaliation. Too bad he forgets Wonwoo has two arms, and can use the other one to pinch him back. Before starting a war he could win – maybe, he’s not sure: Wonwoo is strong but he’s also quite sleepy – but is too tired to fight, Soonyoung does something that could dampen most of his bandmates’ fighting spirit, and earn him a broken rib by some of the others – namely, Jihoon. With Wonwoo... well, he’s never tried.  

So, as Wonwoo is leaning over to probably inflict more pain, Soonyoung moves up to plant a kiss on his cheek, wet noise and everything. He can feel his own lips curling into a happy grin, and maybe Wonwoo is about to smack him in the face, but Soonyoung can’t help it, not when Wonwoo is looking at him with eyes comically wide, as round as his glasses, head tilted. He finds it hysterical, and that’s why his completely useless brain comes up with what, right now, sounds like a brilliant idea: what kind of face would Wonwoo make, if Soonyoung kissed him on the mouth?  

So, Soonyoung just does it . Leans up again and presses his lips full on Wonwoo’s ones, noticing only with the back of his brain how the other freezes up and the surprised – indignant? – sound that tries to leave his lips. It lasts for a second, obviously , as Soonyoung backs off instantly, eager to see Wonwoo’s face. His future self will wholeheartedly disagree, but present-Soonyoung is convinced that has been worthy, kissing his lifelong friend, just to see him making this incredible face, brows furrowed and mouth curled in a weird way, looking at him as to say I know you’re batshit crazy, but aren’t you taking it a bit too far?  

He giggles, feeling very proud of himself, until his treacherous eyes fall on Wonwoo’s lips, and he realizes, belatedly, that he actually kissed Wonwoo. On the mouth. And Soonyoung is generally a very touchy person, especially when drunk, he’s kissed the other member’s cheeks countless times. Never their mouths, though. And it really wouldn’t be an issue, if not for the fact that his lips are kinda tingling, the ghost of Wonwoo’s ones still on them. And Soonyoung’s brain, as per usual, isn’t being helpful, reminding him how much he likes kissing and how long it’s been since he properly done it.   

The answer is: too long. It’s been way too fucking long since the last time.  

Before Wonwoo can say or do anything – like punching him or fly the room – Soonyoung is kissing him again, gripping at his arm and applying just a little more pressure. It doesn’t last much longer than the previous one, maybe two or three seconds, because a part of Soonyoung is scared that Wonwoo will actually get mad at him. It’s stupid, to feel this dizzy after such a chaste, quick kiss, but it was nice . It felt so nice, that damp pressure, the possibility of something more.  

“Care to explain what you’re doing?”  

Clearly, Wonwoo isn’t having his same epiphany, but at least he doesn’t sound neither look mad, on his face the familiar mix of amusement and confusion that is often reserved to Soonyoung.  

“I...” he croaks, clears his throat, tries again, “it’s been a while since I kissed anyone and I just wanted to...” He trails off, not really knowing how to continue. How do you ask a friend for a kiss because the last time you made out with somebody was almost one year ago and you miss doing it?  

Wonwoo is pressing his lips together to suppress a smile and, probably, to refrain himself from telling Soonyoung he’s an utter fool (he’d be right). His eyes, though, are pensive. Or just unfocused since, let’s not forget it, he, too, has been drinking.  

Soonyoung opens his mouth, maybe to apologize, maybe to ask Wonwoo to have some pity and kiss this pathetic friend of his, when Wonwoo extricates his left arm from his grip to put it on the headrest of the couch and fully turns to face him. Eyes wide in a warning, he murmurs “it doesn’t mean anything, okay?” and Soonyoung doesn’t even have the time to be surprised or to nod, that Wonwoo is kissing him.  

To be honest, Soonyoung half-expects for it to be just another pressing of lips. Maybe a bit longer than the previous two, but nothing more. But Wonwoo is his best friend, and if he’s decided to oblige to his tacit request, he’ll do so at the best of his abilities. It takes a moment for it to go from lips pressing together to lips sliding against each other, to Wonwoo alternating small kisses between Soonyoung’s upper and lower lip, lightly sucking on them. Soonyoung sighs, content, tilting his head until it rests on Wonwoo’s arm on the couch. The new angle makes it so that Wonwoo is hovering over him, the pressure of his mouth stronger as he keeps kissing him, relentless.  

Soonyoung knows – really, even in his current state, he knows it – that he should find all this a bit awkward, and yet– he can only think about how nice it is, how good it feels to have Wonwoo kissing him like this, slow and wet. Soonyoung supposes that a part of it is due to the fact that he likes kissing in general, but, when Wonwoo presses with his tongue to make him open his mouth, he thinks that maybe it’s mostly the fact that Wonwoo is a pretty good kisser.  

A low sound escapes him when he feels Wonwoo’s tongue into his mouth, throughly liking into its every corner, precise, with intent. Wonwoo is almost chirurgical in his actions, but it’s hot nonetheless, and Soonyoung is itching to grab onto something to ground himself, but he’s afraid to touch Wonwoo, so he keeps his hands fisted into two balls onto his lap. His body, however, can’t keep still, squirming as he returns the kiss, moves his lips on Wonwoo’s and tries to keep up with his tongue. It’s wet and probably messy, too, Soonyoung has never been a clean kisser, too enthusiastic, too over-eager in the pursuit of pleasure.  

He hums into the kiss, uncapable to stay silent, to stay still, and maybe Wonwoo is smiling a little as he licks behind his teeth, earning another sound from him. Everything is so, so warm until Soonyoung’s squirming makes him press his front against Wonwoo, and the temperature suddenly drops by several degrees when he realizes he’s hard and Wonwoo can probably feel it against his leg.  

“Seriously?” Wonwoo murmurs a mere inch from his lips.  

Mortified, Soonyoung jerks back. “I’ll just– I’m gonna go to the bathroom.”  

He’s ready to stand up and run away, when Wonwoo places a hand in the middle of his chest, grabbing lightly at his t-shirt. “I can do it. If you want?”  

Soonyoung must be dreaming. He must have fallen asleep at some point of the night, because there’s no way in hell that Wonwoo would offer, voice low and face blank, to help him with his hard-on. However, Soonyoung’s head is hurting too much for this to be a dream.  

He should politely refuse, go to his room, think about sad things to make his dick calm down, go to sleep and never think about this night ever again. It’s the most reasonable thing to do. But how can he be reasonable, with his lips still tingling from Wonwoo’s kisses and his dick aching inside his pants, and with Wonwoo– his face is unreadable, as if he doesn’t really care about what answer Soonyoung will give him, but his lips... fuck, his lips are red and glistening with Soonyoung’s saliva.  

Soonyoung nods. Eagerly.  

Wonwoo cocks an eyebrow up and points a finger against Soonyoung’s chest as a warning. “Don't be weird about this later, okay?”  

“Yessir!” Soonyoung salutes, and the giggle that he’s about to let out in seeing Wonwoo’s completely done face dies in his throat when Wonwoo’s hand slides down on his abdomen until it’s on his crotch. Soonyoung shuts up with a gasp, Wonwoo sporting a satisfied, annoying smile as he rests his head on his other hand and starts palming Soonyoung’s dick through his pants. It shouldn’t feel so good, his dick dry humping his friend’s hand, rutting against two layers of clothes. Really, Soonyoung isn’t fifteen anymore. And, yet, an electric thrill runs through his body at every movement of Wonwoo’s hand against him.  

Wonwoo’s face doesn’t help, if he has to be honest. He looks almost bored, eyes blank but fixed on Soonyoung’s face. It’s unnerving, makes Soonyoung feel way too conscious of the fact that he’s the only one to be this worked up. It’s also turning him on even more, and that is a thought he really doesn’t want to dwell on, at the moment. Not when Wonwoo is swiftly bringing down his pants and underwear just enough to let Soonyoung’s – already shamefully hard – dick out.  

Soonyoung has to bite his lips hard not to whimper out loud, losing the control on his features when Wonwoo drags his flat palm over the tip of his cock, just grazing it, smearing the first hints of precum around. Wonwoo is still looking at his face, and Soonyoung really doesn’t want him to see what kind of expressions he’s probably making and will surely make in the near future, so he rolls over to press his face on Wonwoo’s chest, feeling his protruding, sharp collarbone against his chin, the warmth of his neck against his forehead, the decision to not touch Wonwoo be damned.  

With his face finally hidden, he allows himself to let out a shaky exhale that reverberates through his whole body as Wonwoo applies slightly more pressure on his tip only to lessen it a second later, teasing, maddening. Soonyoung tries to curse, but he only manages to mumble something unintelligible on Wonwoo’s sweatshirt, his hips moving up to seek more friction. Wonwoo is a good friend, though, and doesn’t keep up with the teasing, finally wrapping his hand around Soonyoung’s dick. Wonwoo’s hand is dry, but it only burns for a second because Soonyoung is apparently still a teenager and is leaking like he’s never been touched before, so Wonwoo is fast to smear all the precum on his shaft to ease his movements.  

And it’s good. Fuck, it’s really good.   

The room is completely silent with the exception of the wet, dirty sounds of Wonwoo jerking him off and the equally dirty sounds Soonyoung is making, which are thankfully muffled by Wonwoo’s sweater – Soonyoung is drooling on it? Probably. He hopes Wonwoo won’t mind.  

Wonwoo is fast and accurate, stroking him efficiently with just the right amount of pressure to make his orgasm approach by the second, twisting his hand every time it’s near the tip in a way that makes Soonyoung’s body jerk. Waves of liquid heat run through him, his hands scrambling to Wonwoo’s sweatshirt to have something to grab, and when Wonwoo tightens his grip a smidge more and his thumb grazes at his tip, presses on his slit, it’s suddenly all too much, and Soonyoung comes with a sound that he can only describe as a mewl pressed wetly on the expanse of Wonwoo’s neck.  

Wonwoo strokes him through his orgasm until Soonyoung stops shaking and makes a noise to make him stop. He detaches himself from Wonwoo, leans back to look at him. He wants to see what kind of face he’s making, now that he’s made Soonyoung come. But his gaze his unfocused, the alcohol and the relaxation that comes after such release finally taking a tool on him, and he can’t see Wonwoo well. The last thing he remembers before falling asleep is Wonwoo gently patting his leg and getting up from the couch.  

Soonyoung isn’t thinking about what happened. Really.  

When he woke up the morning after, it was to Seungkwan rustling around the room, a bowl of hangover soup in his hands and the face of a person who is regretting all his life choices. It’s a common expression, for Seungkwan, but in this case it’s particularly appropriate.  

After a few seconds of adjustments to realize who and where he was, and why his head was hurting like hell, Soonyoung recalled the previous night’s happenings and jolted on the couch, afraid Seungkwan may have seen him and Wonwoo in a compromising position. However, he was alone. It was obvious, thinking about it. After what happened, with Soonyoung knocked out, Wonwoo must have gone to his own dorm to sleep in his own bed, and not on that tiny couch with a smelly Soonyoung. Also, Wonwoo hates cuddling. So, it wasn’t a real surprise. What did surprise Soonyoung was the fact that he wasn’t, as he expected, with his dick out and with dry cum all over his abdomen, but all clean and clothed. He even had a blanket on his legs.  

He tried to make sense of what happened after he fell asleep, but his brain wasn’t having it, so he just stared into the void until Seungkwan murmured with a faint voice, “Hoshi-hyung, let’s not drink ever again, okay?”  

He had no idea how much Soonyoung agreed with him.  

So, Soonyoung isn’t thinking about it, going on with his life as if nothing happened.  

He doesn’t think about the fact that not only Wonwoo jerked him off – really good, if someone asks him – but, after Soonyoung knocked out like a baby without even a thank you , he also cleaned him up and put a blanket on him. Soonyoung doesn’t think about it, but when he does, he doesn’t make of it more than it actually is: Wonwoo is a good friend and wouldn’t have left him in a disheveled state for everyone to see in the morning. Moreover, Wonwoo can be a menace when he wants, but he’s actually quite a kind guy, and this type of gestures really are his style. Silent, hidden. Everything that happened is very typical Wonwoo-behaviour, given the circumstances. Soonyoung knows it. They’ve been friends since ninth grade, after all.  

Soonyoung’s heart may feel warm thinking about drunk, sleepy Wonwoo quietly attending to him, but it’s just his normal reaction when a friend is kind to him. He’s a person full of love and emotions, and other people’s kindness often feels unexpected and makes him want to cry, that’s all.  

Thoughts about the way Wonwoo stroked him nice and good until he came harder than he’s had in months? Or about the feel of his tongue deep into his mouth? Soonyoung doesn’t have any of those.  

There’s one thing, though.  

Wonwoo didn’t come. Hell, Soonyoung doesn’t even know if he got hard, at some point, but he must have been. Soonyoung would get aroused by getting someone off, and that kiss was really good. Wonwoo must have been at least slightly turned on. And Soonyoung can’t get out of his mind the unpleasant sensation that he’s been really rude, a really bad person, because he fell asleep without offering his nice, perfectly helpful friend a hand. Literally. He took what he wanted and be damned everything else.  

Soonyoung likes to think he’s a pretty generous, loving person. He likes helping others, making them happy. The thought of having been the exact opposite with Wonwoo doesn’t sit well with him. He knows it’s not his fault that he orgasmed so nicely that he basically lost consciousness, but still, he should have tried harder. He should have returned the favor, somehow.  

And this is why, lately, every time Soonyoung sees Wonwoo he wonders if he should, actually, return the favor and, if so, how he should do it. When. Where. So many questions.  

On the other side, it doesn’t help that Wonwoo, probably being a saner person than he is, is really acting like nothing happened. As if kissing and touching his friends’ dicks is part of his normal routine. Soonyoung observes him, trying to see some trace of awareness, some embarrassment, maybe even some teasing towards Soonyoung, but there’s nothing. He’s being the usual Wonwoo, always the same dweeb. And Soonyoung doesn’t have the slightest idea of what’s going on in his mind.  

It’s annoying.  

He manages to swipe his thoughts away when he’s working, especially when he’s practicing, but as soon as he stops, everything comes back to his mind and he returns obsessing over the fact that he didn’t return the favor to Wonwoo. It’s, again, annoying.  

That’s probably why he lets his mouth run free a few weeks after the infamous night, when the performance team is catching a break from the choreography they’ve been working on all evening.  

“What would you do if a friend jerked you off?” Soonyoung blurts out without any particular reason, if not the fact that he’s been thinking about it for the past weeks.  

A sudden silence fills the practice room, which makes Soonyoung realize that he’s actually spoken out loud. He puts his hands on the floor to shift his weight back, trying to be casual as his three bandmates have gone very still on the floor around him, eyes wide and water bottles hanging on mid-air. Eventually, he repeats the question, to make clear that they didn’t hear wrong, and Junhui makes his best nope face and rolls away, busying himself with his phone.  

“What have you done this time?” Minghao says dryly, and really, what kind of image does he have of Soonyoung if he immediately thinks they’re talking about him.   

“It’s not about me! It’s about a friend.”  

Minghao rolls his eyes, he doesn’t believe him. Soonyoung doesn’t even spare Chan a look, because what would a child know.  

“So, a friend of your friend jerked off your friend?” said child asks and then shrugs when Minghao shoots him a look and Soonyoung nods at him.  

He then turns back to Minghao, looking at him with expectant eyes. Minghao sighs, probably understanding he’s stuck into this conversation until Soonyoung gets some opinions.  

“Was it... ah... consensual?” he asks, carefully. From his side of the room, Junhui lets out a painful groan.  

“Yeah.”  

“Your friend was just helped by his other friend, right?”   

Minghao shoots another look at Chan. “Then? What do you want to know?”  

“Well... my friend doesn’t know what to do because– the other one is behaving like nothing happened and he–”  

“He has some feelings for that friend?”   

“No!” Soonyoung yells, sudden panic filling him. “No feelings involved! Just friendship!”  

“Then what .”  

Soonyoung opens and closes his mouth a few times, words suddenly escaping him after the mere suggestion of him having feelings for Wonwoo. He doesn’t, of course, he’s sure of it. He’s only afraid he’s been a selfish friend.  

“Let me see if I understood,” Chan says, and he’s really talking too much, for being a child who should not hear this discourse. “A friend of your friend jerked him off, your friend is confused even if he has no feelings for his friend and–”  

“Stop talking like that, it’s confusing!” Junhui finally explodes, sounding a bit hysterical.  

“I know, but it’s fun,” Chan says as Minghao mutters a relieved “thank you”.  

“You!” Junhui points a finger to Soonyoung. “Which of your friends did you jerk off?”  

Soonyoung splutters at being exposed like that. “I– I didn’t jerk off any–”  

“Oh, stop being like that, we know it’s about you.”  

“I’m not lying!” he screeches, and he can see that Minghao is one step away from kicking him, so he clarifies, voice suddenly lower, “I’m the other guy.”  

“Oh.”  

It’s funny, the shift in the others’ demeanor after they learn that Soonyoung didn’t do anything to put himself into this kind of trouble. Well, they don’t know he basically begged Wonwoo to kiss him, so, technically, he’s the one who started it, but they don’t need to.  

Minghao is massaging the bridge of his nose with a pained expression, but his voice is soft when he says, “and you don’t have feelings for this friend of yours.”  

Soonyoung readily shakes his head. “I’m only worried that I’ve been a bad friend.”  

Minghao frowns. “I’m really not following you.”  

“You know...” Soonyoung suddenly feels a tiny bit of embarrassment, in having this conversation. He’s not exactly shy about talking about this kind of stuff with his members – he couldn’t possibly be, not after living together for so long and since they were teenagers – but there’s something about narrating this particular experience, going down into its details, that’s making him squirm on his spot on the floor. “He– ah, helped me, and was also really good at it, if you want to know–”  

“We don’t,” Minghao and Junhui say at the same time. Chan stays silent, looking vaguely interested and way too amused, and really, who corrupted this child?  

“Anyway, I fell asleep right after it. I didn’t... help him in return.”  

The silence that follows makes Soonyoung suspect that, maybe, he’s seeing a problem where there isn’t any.  

“And does he seem upset about it?” Chan asks after a while. Soonyoung needs him to stop talking and cover his ears.  

“He doesn’t, he’s been behaving like nothing happened!” Soonyoung exclaims, frustrated.  

Minghao shakes his head. “Then why are you worrying about it? He’s clearly okay with it.”  

“You know, he probably wasn’t even turned on,” Junhui mutters with his casual, innocent air.  

“That’s rude,” Soonyoung pouts as Chan rolls on the floor laughing. “Maybe he’s okay with it, but I am not, because it was a selfish behavior and I’m not selfish!”  

He can’t decipher the look Minghao gives to Junhui, who shrugs in return, but he suspects they’ve just confirmed he’s a lost case. They’re probably right, but also cruel. It’s, of course, Chan who gives him the only real answer.  

“Then you should just return him the favor, hyung.”  

Soonyoung always knew Lee Chan was the only sensitive, useful person, the only one he could turn up to for a problem like this. His young age only gives him a more open mind, so in tune with Soonyoung’s. He should have talked with him only, so that he wouldn’t have to hear Minghao’s objections.  

“So, what, he’ll just go to him and jerk him off?” he sounds incredulous, his voice a pitch higher like when he’s distressed.  

“Hyung, why are you being so dramatic? He’ll go and talk to him first. They’re friends, right? It’s going to be okay.”  

Perhaps they should be a little concerned by the fact that Chan talks like this is nothing, as if he’s a navigated man, but Soonyoung doesn’t have it in him, not when he finally received an external approval to his plan.  

Right before they start practicing again, Minghao gives him a final look and shakes his head.   

“You really enjoy getting into trouble, don’t you, hyung?”  

And oh, how right he is.  

After setting his mind on the decision, Soonyoung doesn’t waste too much time on thinking about how he’s going to do it. He simply waits for an evening when he’s sure both him and Wonwoo don’t have any more schedules. As Chan – like the wise man he is – said, he won’t have any problems, Wonwoo is his friend. And he already proved himself willing to help, from this point of view.  

It’s going to be okay.  

He’ll get Wonwoo off – he’ll be amazing at it, too – and he’ll finally stop thinking about it, going back to his normal life.  

When he knocks at Wonwoo and Mingyu’s shared apartment’s door, Soonyoung is unreasonably surprised in finding Mingyu in front of him. He shouldn’t, since, well, Mingyu lives there. He freezes for an instant, thinking about the possibility of Mingyu hearing them, but he recovers quickly, setting the thought aside. Wonwoo doesn’t seem loud, anyway.  

“Hey Mingyu, Wonwoo’s in his room?”  

Soonyoung doesn’t give the poor man the time to answer, that he’s already into the apartment, marching towards his destination. He knocks on the door more out of habit than anything, and the action is pretty useless, too, since he barges into the room without waiting for an answer. He’s a man on a mission, he doesn’t have time .  

Wonwoo is lying on his bed with an opened book in his lap, but from the messy hair and the confused expression, Soonyoung can tell he was dozing off. Cute , Soonyoung thinks.  

“Soonyoung?” Wonwoo calls with a soft voice. Yes, he was napping.  

“Hey.” Soonyoung closes the door behind himself and walks to the bed, sitting on the edge near Wonwoo’s legs. “Sorry, did I wake you up?”  

Wonwoo shakes his head, lying. It’s commendable, that Soonyoung bulldozed into his room, probably awakening from a much-needed nap, sat on his bed without asking first, and Wonwoo is still looking at him calmly, without the slightest hint of annoyance. What a nice guy. He deserves a blowjob, Soonyoung decides on the spot.  

“I’ve been thinking...” Wonwoo’s brows shoot up, Soonyoung smacks his leg. “I’ve been thinking about the other night.”  

Wonwoo frowns, not annoyed but confused. “What about it?”  

“I’ve been thinking,” Soonyoung repeats, “that you didn’t come.”  

Wonwoo’s eyes get comically wide, and Soonyoung cuts off any retort by adding, “you’ve been so nice to me, and I didn’t do anything for you in return.” He explains, but Wonwoo is still frowning, this time looking way less confused. He sits higher against his pillows and points a finger at Soonyoung in a way that reminds him of that night.  

“You promised you weren’t going to be weird about it.” Wonwoo accuses.  

“I’m not being weird, I’m being fair!”  

“I shouldn’t have done anything,” Wonwoo mumbles more to himself than to Soonyoung.  

“No, no.” Soonyoung scoots over on the bed, almost on his knees, waving his hands frantically. He’s having to work more that he predicted and he’s getting anxious he’s going to fluke. “You’ve been a good friend, while I– I fell asleep and didn’t return the favor.”  

Wonwoo grimaces, “you didn’t need to.”  

“I did. I do . That’s why I’m here.”  

Soonyoung observes how comprehension dawns on Wonwoo, how his eyes get even wider, how is features move, clearly undecided between terror and amusement.  

“You’re a psychopath,” Wonwoo says in the end.  

“I’m a caring friend who hates inequalities.” Soonyoung corrects him.  

Wonwoo doesn’t say anything, but the more time passes, the more Soonyoung grows certain of his success. Because, since they’ve known each other, Wonwoo has always been there to support him in whatever thing he wanted to do, an enabler of his shenanigans. Always his silent, hidden partner in crime. He may seem cool and aloof, but Soonyoung knows he enjoys his antics. And maybe that makes him even more of a psychopath than Soonyoung.  

“Now?” Wonwoo asks after a while, and Soonyoung silently rejoices because, despite the perpetual frown on his face, Wonwoo has just agreed.  

He nods, and Wonwoo can’t seem to stop whining , all soft voice and sleepy face. Cute , Soonyoung thinks once again.  

“I’m not even in the mood...”  

“I’m gonna get you in the mood,” Soonyoung says merrily as he straddles Wonwoo’s legs and Wonwoo leans his head back on the pillows with a resigned sigh. Soonyoung points to the book that’s still on his abdomen. “You’re not going to put that away?”  

Wonwoo gives him a blank look. “At least I can go back to read if you’re bad at it.”  

Soonyoung smacks his thigh again. “Asshole. Just wait and see.”  

Despite all his bravado, Soonyoung stalls, suddenly unsure on how to proceed. He, admittedly, didn’t think so far – better, he didn’t think at all. He’s fairly confident in his abilities in getting a turned on Wonwoo off, but actually turning him on? A look at his very soft crotch makes him realize that he has to work from scratch and that– he didn’t think about this possibility. He fiddles with the hem of Wonwoo’s sweatshirt, thinking, when Wonwoo moves with an annoyed huff and turns off the lights.  

Oh , Soonyoung thinks, this is better . There’s still light coming from the window, he can still see everything, but somehow the dimmer light makes him feel less self-conscious. It’s going to be okay, a hand on a dick is a hand on a dick, after all.  

Soonyoung settles himself better on Wonwoo and puts a hand on his crotch, tentatively touching his soft dick with his fingertips. He shoots a look at Wonwoo, to gauge his reaction, but he’s staring blankly at the ceiling, hands on his book in a threatening way. Soonyoung doesn’t let himself be discouraged, though, and starts stroking Wonwoo through his pants, applying more pressure but not too much, so that the fabric against his skin isn’t too uncomfortable.   

Feeling like the two layers of clothes are making his job way harder than it already is – pun not intended – Soonyoung shoves his hand under Wonwoo’s pants, moving is flattened palm up and down with only the thin texture of the underwear as a barrier. It’s better, Soonyoung can feel Wonwoo’s warmth, the consistency of him, and it makes him more aware of what he’s doing. Finally, he starts getting some results when he presses his thumb on the slit through the fabric, Wonwoo’s hips jerking and a soft hum coming from his closed mouth. Soonyoung continues going in that direction, massaging his tip every few strokes, until Wonwoo is, finally, semi-hard.  

“Can I?” he asks putting his fingers under the waistband, and Wonwoo silently raises his hips to allow him to bring down both his pants and his underwear. Soonyoung slides down with them until his face is in front of Wonwoo’s dick.  

Wonwoo hastily raises his head, looking alarmed. “What– why are you–”  

“You’ve been very nice in not telling me you were sleeping, earlier,” Soonyoung says, simply. “And when you cleaned me and covered me the other day, too.”  

Wonwoo doesn’t seem convinced with his explanation, but he shakes his head and leans back again.  

“You know what, do what you want.”  

Soonyoung grins and then opens his mouth, covering his teeth with his lips, taking what he can manage of Wonwoo’s length into his mouth without gagging and wrapping his hand around what he can’t take – which, he realizes with the back of his mind, is a lot. He tries to not focus on this fact and hopes to forget it instantly.  

Soonyoung isn’t really made for teasing, he genuinely enjoys giving his partner what they want, when they want it. And, especially, he doesn’t care about teasing now , when the whole point is to make Wonwoo come, not dragging this for hours. So, he starts bobbing his head from the very beginning, following a steady rhythm – not too fast, so that it’s actually pleasurable, but neither teasingly slow. He isn’t here to taste Wonwoo’s cock, for god’s sake.  

Truth being told, it doesn’t take long for Wonwoo to get fully hard into his mouth, which means what Soonyoung is doing is at least decent, but– he’s being so fucking quiet , it’s making Soonyoung restless. Of course, he doesn’t want Mingyu to hear, but still. Wonwoo is laying still under him, his breath isn’t even a little bit fastened. Some kind of reaction would be good.  

“Am I doing well?” it’s what Soonyoung intends asking, but it comes out as something like “ehminglshaell” because he forgets he still has his mouth full. Wonwoo kicks him with his heel.  

“Don’t talk with my dick in your mouth,” he complains, and Soonyoung laughs, finding it hysterical. That – either the vibrations from Soonyoung’s laugh or the feel of his breath against the skin as he’s giggling – finally makes Wonwoo hiss. Soonyoung takes the hint and moves his head up until only the tip is into his mouth, swirls the tongue around it and hums, feeling extremely satisfied when Wonwoo’s hips suddenly jerk up.  

“ Oh . That’s– that was good.”  

Wonwoo breathes out in a voice Soonyoung has never heard before, his hand going down to tangle into Soonyoung’s hair, and it only spurs Soonyoung more. He does it again and again, his sounds around Wonwoo’s dick getting louder, relishing in how he can now hear Wonwoo breathing faster, feel his body tensing under the hand he has on his hip. Wonwoo shifts under him, all tensed up in a way that makes evident he’s restraining from thrusting up into Soonyoung’s mouth. It’s exhilarating.  

Soonyoung keeps the hand that’s not holding his length on Wonwoo’s hip, but he doesn’t try to stop him from moving a little. Instead, he relaxes the jaw the best he can, bobbing his head up and down, faster and faster until he feels the grip on his hair getting stronger, Wonwoo trying to pull him off as he murmurs “I’m close.”  

Soonyoung’s mind registers his words, but somehow his body is slow to react, and he only removes his mouth when Wonwoo has started coming, his release irremediably landing on Soonyoung’s face, on his cheeks and nose and lips. He keeps stroking him until Wonwoo goes soft in his hand and presses his heel again on Soonyoung’s leg to make him let go.  

Soonyoung laughs a little dazed and wipes the come from his face with his sleeve.  

“You good?” he asks as he’s putting Wonwoo’s clothes back in their place.  

Wonwoo glances at what his hands are doing, then at his face. “I guess so,” he answers, trying to be the usual menace, but Soonyoung can hear how breathless he is, can see how relaxed he has gotten him.  

He giggles again, wiping his dirty hand on Wonwoo’s sweatshirt, and Wonwoo kicks him off the bed.  

A part of Soonyoung, the same one who wanted to see the kind of face Wonwoo would make after a kiss, would have liked to see Wonwoo’s face as he came, to closely observe all the shifts in his features as Soonyoung pleasured him.  

But, Soonyoung reflects when he’s back into his room, dick achingly hard in his pants, maybe it was for the best that it didn’t happen. 

Soonyoung is now a free man.  

The glow must be evident in his face, because the next time he meets Chan, he makes an inquisitive noise, mouth already curled up in a smile, and Soonyoung gives him two thumbs up in response. Minghao catches the exchange and shakes his head, but Soonyoung ignores him. Nothing, not even Minghao’s silent disapproval, can shake off this feeling of lightness.  

Soonyoung didn’t realize how much he was thinking about the idea of returning the favor to Wonwoo, until he actually returned it and stopped thinking about it. His mind is way clearer, ha can focus better on his work. The fact that he doesn’t think about shoving his hand into Wonwoo’s pants every time he sees him is a nice plus, too.  

Everything is back to normal. Soonyoung is a free man.  

He should be.  

He fucking isn’t .  

At first, Soonyoung doesn’t think too much of it. It’s pretty normal to think back about past hook-ups from time to time, when at the end of the day he’s dead tired and wants to quickly get off and go to sleep.  

Maybe, just maybe, it isn’t that normal that his mind comes up with unwanted memories – how Wonwoo has felt in his mouth, his hand in Soonyoung’s hair, his soft breaths as he came – in random moments of the day. Maybe, Soonyoung thinks, he’s been sex-deprived for too long and should just get laid.  

He realizes something is wrong a few weeks after, on a perfectly normal day of January.  

Soonyoung is seated on the floor of the practice room, in theory starting his warming up exercises, but actually wasting time scrolling through Instagram. Practice will start in about thirty minutes and most of the members are not yet to be seen anyway, so he can take his sweet little time.  

He glances up sensing somebody entering the room, seeing – of course, who else could it be – Wonwoo through the mirror.  

“Wonwoo-yah, aren’t you cold?”  

It's so out of character, for Wonwoo, to stroll around in a simple t-shirt in the middle of winter. But god forbid him if he’d go one day of practice without a beanie or the omnipresent face mask hanging low on his chin. He must have not shaven properly again.  

“Mh?” Wonwoo looks up from his phone and notices him. “Oh, I’m okay, I came directly from the gym.”  

And that’s even more out of character. It's been a few years since Wonwoo has started consistently – well, somehow – working out, but doing it right before a whole evening dedicated to dance practice? Not even Soonyoung does that (because he gets dragged by Jihoon after practice, that’s why). What a weirdo.  

Soonyoung fiddles with his phone, catching his reflection on the screen. He looks decent, all bundled up in his black jacket and beanie. When he raises his phone to take a selca, it’s something like an automatic action, to call for Wonwoo to join him.  

“Let’s take some selcas for the fans?”  

As always, Wonwoo doesn’t question him and is by Soonyoung’s back in a matter of seconds. And– it’s been a huge mistake on his part, Soonyoung realizes belatedly, because Wonwoo has draped himself over Soonyoung’s back, pressed close against him, and Soonyoung freezes. Wonwoo is uncharacteristically warm. And big. And his face is very close to Soonyoung’s, he can feel his breath on his neck.   

Wonwoo probably senses that he’s not going to behave like a normal person any time soon, and takes the phone from his hands, starting to take pictures. Normally, it would be a terrible idea, to let Wonwoo take some selcas, because yes, he's great at taking pictures, but not of himself. However, as Soonyoung watches them on the screen, hands still frozen up on his lap, mind in turmoil, the photos Wonwoo is taking this time aren’t half bad.  

No, scratch that, they’re really fucking cute.  

It's a testament of how long Soonyoung has been in this line of work, the fact that, despite brain gone mush, he still manages to arrange his features in some cute poses. He has no idea how many photos Wonwoo is taking, how much time has passed, his mind hyper-fixating on how Wonwoo is plastered against his back. How, despite the clothes, Soonyoung can feel his pectoral muscles. How his arms are on each side of Soonyoung’s head, and he can’t stop thinking about how would it be if he turned his face.  

This is stupid.   

Wonwoo isn’t that much bigger than him. He’s taller, but not by much, and Soonyoung is pretty sure he could snap his scrawny legs in half if he wanted to. Soonyoung has even started working out earlier than him and does it with more consistency, and his body isn’t half bad, if he’s allowed to say so himself.   

But then why does Wonwoo feel so broad? Why does Soonyoung feel completely engulfed by his presence, his weight on the back, the faint smell of his cologne all around him? Why is Soonyoung’s body twitching with the need to press back, to lean his head better on Wonwoo’s shoulder and let himself be properly embraced? Why are there goosebumps all over his body?   

He forces himself to stop thinking and scrunches his face in a cute pose for the photos. Then he makes yet another mistake by looking at Wonwoo’s face on the screen, Wonwoo’s adorable face, to be more precise, stupid beanie and stupid wide eyes behind stupid round glasses.   

Soonyoung wants to punch him. He has absolutely no business looking that cute while Soonyoung is currently fighting for his life trying to calm his dick down while he imagines how it would be to get pinned to the floor by him.   

Finally, Wonwoo straightens up and gives Soonyoung his phone back. Soonyoung doesn’t drop it by mere chance.   

“Choose those you want to post, they all seem nice,” Wonwoo says, then gives him a look. “Are you okay?”  

Soonyoung nods, dazed and slightly horny. Wonwoo frowns. “You’re so quiet today.”  

“I’m just tired.” He waves his hand dismissively, and Wonwoo hums before finally going to put away his phone and join some of the members that arrived.  

Soonyoung stays where he is, head buzzing, not sure of what just happened. He tries to choose the photos to post online, but it’s a hard task, they’re all really cute. Soonyoung is never going to delete any of them.   

He’s being ridiculous, he’s very much aware of it, but he doesn’t know how to stop his mind from going back to how nice it felt when Wonwoo basically hugged him from behind. Maybe Soonyoung has a thing for guys who are bigger than him. Maybe he should really get laid and stop projecting his frustrations on Wonwoo.   

As if on cue, as he raises his head from the phone, he sees a potential savior right next to him, tall and big and exactly what Soonyoung needs.   

“Mingyu, my tallest friend.” Mingyu looks at him weird before going back to try taming his hair. Soonyoung doesn’t desist. He managed to get Wonwoo to kiss him, he surely will manage to obtain this from the way more approachable, way more eager to help Mingyu.   

“I need you to do me a favor.”  

Mingyu looks at him again, this time listening, waiting for him to continue. Soonyoung swallows.  

“Can you please hug me from behind?”  

Mingyu blinks one, two times. He looks around, maybe to see if there are some hidden cameras. Soonyoung tries to make the most serious face he can, because it's a serious experiment he’s about to conduct. Mingyu probably perceives the scientific implications of the request, so he nods.   

“Okay,” he says easily, and even more easily he goes behind Soonyoung and slips his arms around him. “Like this?”  

Soonyoung nods, relaxing against Mingyu’s chest. It’s nice, he can’t say in good conscience that it isn’t. But it’s only nice because Soonyoung likes hugging and getting hugged by his friends, and because Mingyu is very, very warm. It’s like being nicely wrapped in a cozy blanket.   

But the twisting of his insides, the hands covered in cold sweat, the fucking want he felt with Wonwoo? They’re not there. Not even with his biggest and, let’s say it, most handsome friend.  

“This doesn’t make sense,” he says breaking the embrace, Mingyu left with his arms hanging mid-air. “I don’t feel anything.”  

Mingyu pouts. “Why do I feel insulted?” And then he looks at Soonyoung with a pensive face for a few seconds, like he’s in deep thoughts. Soonyoung doesn’t like it one bit.   

“Is this about Wonwoo-hyung?”  

Soonyoung groans audibly. Fuck Mingyu and his sexy brain.  

He feigns ignorance. “What are you talking about?”  

“You tell me.”  

Soonyoung doesn’t say anything more because he really doesn’t need to. Instead, his eyes fall on Wonwoo again. He’s laughing at something Seungkwan is saying, clapping hands, ugly laugh and ears sticking out from his beanie like fucking Dopey. Soonyoung thinks back at how his dick felt into his mouth, hot and heavy, and has the sudden urge to smash his own skull against the mirror.   

He has a problem.  

“I messed up,” Soonyoung announces when he barges into Jihoon’s studio.  

“What have you done?” Jihoon says without even looking at him, not stopping his work at the computer. He doesn’t add the “this time” at the end like Minghao usually does, but it’s implicit in his tone so it really doesn’t make much difference.  

“First of all, I kissed Wonwoo.” The clicking noises of the mouse stop abruptly. “Then he jerked me off, and then I blew him , and now I’m feeling weird things. But really, the first mistake was kissing him.”  

Jihoon is now looking at him as if he grew a second head. And, considering how much Soonyoung has been thinking with his dick lately, he’s not completely wrong.  

“There are sounds coming from your mouth,” Jihoon says slowly, “but none of them are making any sense.”  

“ Exactly ,” Soonyoung says, widening his eyes, glad that Jihoon got the point. “Nothing about this makes sense!”  

“The part where you kissed Wonwoo or what the two of you have done after that?”  

Soonyoung waves his hand. “Not that, I’m talking about feeling strange things about him.”  

Jihoon is still watching him weird. Maybe he hasn’t gotten the point, after all. “I mean... it’s pretty normal feeling things, after what you’ve done?” Soonyoung frowns. They’ve just helped each other, friends do that all the time. Right? “Why did you kiss him in the first place?”  

That’s– a valid question, Soonyoung can concede him that. But there’s a very rational answer, too. “Because... I wanted to?” Jihoon widens his eyes and is about to retort, so Soonyoung adds, “I don’t know, I was a bit drunk and I wanted him to kiss me.”  

“You do realize this is the first weird thing, right?”  

“Why? I , too, would like to be kissed by Wonwoo-hyung.”  

Soonyoung almost gets whiplash from how fast he turns towards the source of the noise, finding Seungkwan leaning against the door frame, arms crossed and a very matter-of-fact expression, as if he a) hasn’t been eavesdropping to a conversation that he wasn’t supposed to listen to, and b) hasn’t just dropped the most nonsensical bit of information.  

To add to Soonyoung’s already considerable humiliation, Seungkwan looks towards a point they can’t see and asks to an unknown presence, “am I right? You’d like it too.” And then Seokmin’s face appears at the other side of the door.  

“I would,” he says, pensive. “But then again, I like kissing my friends in general.”  

“What are you doing here?!” Soonyoung chokes, finally. He feels like he’s a second away from a heart attack. One thing was talking with the performance team about friendly jerk offs, another thing is talking about– this. Wanting to kiss somebody, feeling things about them. About Soonyoung’s sudden need to know how Wonwoo would feel between his legs.  

Meanwhile, the two intruders go on as if nothing’s wrong.  

“Yes, but we’re talking about that kind of kisses, hyung. Not the drunk ones on the cheek.”  

Seokmin makes a very stupid face. “Oh! Then... oh . I think I’d like that, too?” he says in the end after a few seconds of deep thinking, looking as if he just got an epiphany of sort. Soonyoung can relate to that feeling, at least.  

Seungkwan nods, apparently satisfied. “Right? There’s just something about the thought of Wonwoo-hyung, who never initiates skinship, kissing you, right?” he says while gazing at the distance, thinking to whoever knows what, and Seokmin makes a knowing noise. Jihoon pinches the bridge of his nose. Soonyoung is hyperventilating.  

“The point is” Seungkwan snaps out from his fantasies, “there’s nothing weird about wanting to try and kiss someone. The weird thing is starting to feel weird about something that was supposed to be a casual experiment.”  

He’s waving his index in front of his face in an annoying know-it-all way, and Soonyoung would really like to talk back and explain that he knows nothing, but he opens and closes his mouth a few times, no sounds coming out. Because, well, Seungkwan is right.  

“Okay, enough.” Jihoon intervenes. Whether it is because he noticed Soonyoung panicking or because he was getting tired of all the noise, Soonyoung doesn’t know and doesn’t care, either.  

“You two.” Jihoon looks at Seungkwan and Seokmin. “Get out. And close the door.”  

Seungkwan pouts but promptly obeys without complains, other than a mumbled “we were just trying to help.”  

Once they’ve gone, Soonyoung drops himself on a chair, suddenly exhausted.  

“Soonyoung.”  

Jihoon’s voice is stern, but kind. His eyes are, too.  

“Tell me exactly what happened.”  

And Soonyoung tells him, without going into the most sordid, explicit details, but not omitting anything either, be it actions or thoughts. Once he starts, it’s easy to keep talking, him and Jihoon have been so close for so long that they know how to handle each other. Jihoon knows that he shouldn’t stare at Soonyoung as he talks, so he keeps his eyes on his own hands, as if immersed in his thoughts, until Soonyoung reaches the end of the story – which isn’t too long anyway.  

“I don’t know, maybe I’m just horny.” Soonyoung finishes with a chirpy, fake laugh, trying to downplay what he just said.  

Jihoon safely looks at him again. “I think you’re horny for Wonwoo only, though.”  

Soonyoung stops laughing. Jihoon is right. He brings his hands to his face with a desperate groan, then looks up again at Jihoon’s next question.  

“Do you like him?”  

“I don’t,” Soonyoung has the answer ready, he’s certain of it. Jihoon raises his brows skeptically. “For real. He’s my best friend, I like him as much as I like you.”  

“Then I sure hope, for the both of us, you won’t ever try to put your mouth on my dick.”  

There’s a beat of silence, Jihoon’s lips curling up slightly, and Soonyoung bursts out laughing. He sounds hysterical.  

“Okay, okay.” Jihoon continues after Soonyoung has calmed down a bit. “Maybe you don’t have romantic feelings for Wonwoo, but you’re attracted to him.”  

Soonyoung– thinks about it. In the past days he’s been so preoccupied with setting things right with Wonwoo first, and freaking out about it later, that he hasn’t stopped to think . Wonwoo is an objectively attractive guy, there’s no doubt about it, but is Soonyoung attracted to him?  

The image of Wonwoo’s face getting nearer before kissing him pops in Soonyoung’s mind. That low seriously? when he found out Soonyoung was hard. The soft hisses when he came across Soonyoung’s burning face. His cute face on those photos they took together. Soonyoung shivers.  

It isn’t just a matter of how Wonwoo looks. Soonyoung isn’t immune to beauty, of course – he’s human – but he doesn’t give it too much weight, either. He isn’t drawn by it only. He couldn’t be, not when he’s surrounded by canonically beautiful people every day and after he’s grown next to guys like Jeonghan or Mingyu.  

It’s not just about Wonwoo being good looking, and maybe that’s the problem.  

“Jihoon-ah,” he whines pathetically.  

Jihoon smiles. “Seungkwan isn’t completely wrong, you know?”  

Soonyoung doesn’t want to think about Seungkwan and his desire to kiss Wonwoo. Seokmin, too. Jeon Wonwoo, you popular, attractive loser.  

“About what? Please don’t tell me you’d kiss Wonwoo too.”  

Jihoon lightly kicks his shin. Impressive he managed to reach, since they’re not seated that nearby. “About the fact that there’s nothing weird in wanting to kiss somebody, dumbass.”  

“It’s not–” oh, how to phrase it without looking like a complete mess. “It’s not just that I want to kiss him, Jihoon. I… I can’t stop thinking about him?” it isn’t really a question, more like him voicing out his frustration. Jihoon cocks his head to the side. “When he’s around I can’t stop looking at him, and I want to touch him all the time. I want him to touch me. And since I’m not in love with Wonwoo, and he’s being the usual weirdo he’s always been, I’m the one who changed, but I don’t know how and why.”  

Either Jihoon has a formidable poker face, or he isn’t surprised in the slight by Soonyoung’s shameful confession.  

“As I said, you’re attracted to him. So what?”  

“Eh?”  

“Where is the problem?”  

Soonyoung feels like his head is about to implode. Jihoon is supposed to be smart, objective. Why can’t he see that the problem is literally everywhere?  

“The problem,” he says, underlining the word problem like he’s talking to a kid, “it’s that Wonwoo is my friend, and I need to make these– feelings go away.”  

“But why?” Soonyoung makes a noise, ready to scream, and Jihoon adds, “I mean, first you should talk to him about it. Then, if he doesn’t reciprocate, you’ll think about how to deal with your feelings.”  

“Are you somehow implying that there’s a remote chance Wonwoo would be on board with whatever I want to do with him?”  

Jihoon’s face screams yes . Be it any other topic, Soonyoung would probably agree. In all the years they’ve known each other, Soonyoung can count on one hand the times Wonwoo refused him something. The point is, this time it’s a bit different. They’re not talking about Soonyoung’s decision to be a tiger and Wonwoo going with it. Soonyoung tells Jihoon exactly this, with zero results.  

“I don’t think you get it.”  

“I could say the very same to you!” Soonyoung splutters.  

Jihoon shakes his head. “Think about it. Wonwoo let you do all those things to him already.”  

“Yes, but...”  

“And he never acts on a spur. Wonwoo always acts after thinking, he doesn’t move on instinct, Soonyoung.”  

He says it as if he’s making a point, and Soonyoung actually stops to think about his words. They’re true, but the fact that Wonwoo is a fucking strategist even in his daily life only means that he thought about the pros and the cons of what Soonyoung was proposing, and decided it was okay. It doesn’t mean that he’d want to keep on doing it or– to do even more, with him.  

Soonyoung realizes he’s frowning when Jihoon’s small hand smoothers the line between his brows.  

“Talk to him,” Jihoon says. “It’s going to be fine.” 

Jihoon is right, as always. Soonyoung knows it.  

That been said, he has no intention of talking to Wonwoo about anything at all, at least not in the near future. Jihoon makes it sound easy with the excuse that Wonwoo is his friend, but even so, how does one walk up to his best friend since ninth grade to reveal he has the hots for him. After Wonwoo specifically told him to not get weird.   

He can’t do it.  

Well, maybe he will, at some point in his life. When they’re fifty and Soonyoung will be able to laugh about it. “Hey, remember that crazy time I basically begged you for a handjob? I then spent the following months having wet dreams about you, crazy right? Haha. Here, look at my niece’s photos, isn’t she adorable?”  

Yes, something like that.  

Soonyoung collapses on the bench with a sigh after a set of triceps raises, the left arm slightly burning. He pulls out his phone as an automatic reflex, knowing that he can take it easy since he didn’t come to the gym with Jihoon, that beast. Despite the insistent nagging inside his head, Soonyoung feels good – cute – enough to turn on the frontal camera and take some pictures, wondering if he looks better with his left arm naked, out of the hoodie, or if he should redress himself.  

“Why every time I see you lately, you’re taking selcas instead of doing what you’re supposed to do?” 
Soonyoung should be surprised, to hear Wonwoo’s voice in the empty gym at this ungodly hour of the night. But, with how things have been going lately, he can’t bring himself to be shocked, and silently accepts anything life has decided to throw at him this time. 

“At least I have something to post for the fans, unlike someone else,” Soonyoung says without even turning to look at Wonwoo. “You post what, twice a year? You’re terrible.”  

Wonwoo laughs from somewhere behind him. Soonyoung could watch him through the mirror that is on the opposite wall, but he refuses to, keeping his focus on his selca game.  

“Why should I bother, when I have you posting for me without me having to do anything?”  

His voice is dangerously near and, oh , Soonyoung thinks, so that’s how it’s going to be this time.  

Life is being quite unoriginal, because Wonwoo sits behind him on the bench, once again pressing himself against Soonyoung’s back. This time, Soonyoung is a little more prepared for the heat that engulfs him as soon as Wonwoo touches him, but he tries to not focus much on it and just snaps a picture quickly. He’d say his stomach doesn’t clench in seeing how good Wonwoo looks, even with half of his face covered by the mask and his hair dry from the bleach, but he’d be lying. He looks so fucking good and Soonyoung needs him to move away now .  

However, Wonwoo – yes, the very same Jeon Wonwoo who doesn’t like taking pictures of himself – isn’t satisfied with this perfectly nice photo, and he scoots closer to Soonyoung, sliding an arm around his shoulders and throwing a peace sign with the other.   

And it’s then that Soonyoung makes – yet another – mistake. He looks at them in the mirror and his breath hitches. While the previous time he could only feel Wonwoo behind him, now that he can actually see him, hot and so, so broad, compared to Soonyoung, that muscular arm over him, his brain almost short-circuits, and he takes another photo before his hands fail him and drop the phone.  

With how messy Wonwoo’s hair is, and with Soonyoung’s flimsy shorts all risen up, leaving his legs almost completely bare, one could think they’ve just rolled out of bed, Soonyoung’s silly brain provides.  

Moving on instinct more than anything, Soonyoung presses back a little, heat radiating from his neck to his lower back, and in every point Wonwoo is touching him.  

Fuck, Soonyoung wants him.  

And it’s wrong on so many levels, first and foremost because Wonwoo has no idea of what’s going on in Soonyoung’s dirty mind. He's innocently posing for a photo not knowing that Soonyoung is already sporting a boner from just him... being there. He feels like sinking, blood pounding into his ears, painfully aware of every inch of his body. Seriously, what’s wrong with him.  

He curses under his breath, and notices it only when Wonwoo asks “are you okay?”  

Soonyoung startles, returning back into his own body. This is bad.  

He lowers his phone and puts it back into his hoodie’s pocket. “I’m sorry, I–”  

“Have I done something?” Wonwoo cuts him off.  

“W-what?”  

“I feel like you’ve been avoiding me, lately.”  

Wonwoo's voice is dangerously near, and he must have lowered his mask because Soonyoung can feel his breath on his right cheek. He sounds a little dejected, and Soonyoung wants to punch himself. He tries to move away, but Wonwoo tightens his arm around him, preventing him to do so, and this time there’s nothing to stop Soonyoung from groaning out loud, because fuck him if this isn’t how most of his recent fantasies start, with Wonwoo’s strong arms keeping him into place.  

He realizes that, despite his original plan of not talking about this until retirement age, Soonyoung has to speak, now. Because Wonwoo is demanding answers and if he looks down or in the mirror in front of them, he’ll see that Soonyoung is getting hard. Again.  

“I...” he starts, trying to calm down his breathing. “I have to apologize, Wonwoo-yah.”  

“For what?”  

“It seems like I... can’t stop having thoughts about you.” Soonyoung confesses.  

“Thoughts?” Wonwoo murmurs, puzzled. He’s talking right against his ear, and Soonyoung shivers, unable to repress another groan.  

“ That kind of thoughts.”  

There's a beat of silence, Wonwoo stiffening against him. “Oh,” he says after a while, “I thought–”  

“I know, I’m sorry,” Soonyoung says quickly, mortified. “I know I shouldn’t, and it doesn’t make sense, but... I keep thinking about it.”  

Done with humiliating himself, aware that he has probably just ruined one of his most precious friendships, Soonyoung tries to get up from the bench. He yelps when Wonwoo stops him once again with the mere force of his arm, this time his hand completely splayed on Soonyoung’s chest.  

“Wha–”  

“You’re hard.” Wonwoo points out, as if Soonyoung isn’t already painfully aware of it. “You were the other day, too, when you left my room.”  

“Yes, it’s what I’m trying to tell you.”  

“You get turned on very easily.”  

First of all, that’s not the point, and, secondly, it’s all Wonwoo’s fault. However, whatever thing Soonyoung was about to say gets swallowed into a loud gasp as he feels Wonwoo’s lips grazing at his neck.  

“Wonwoo?! What are you doing?!”  

“Experimenting,” Wonwoo answers, lips still on his neck.  

“Wonwoo,” Soonyoung says, breathless. He's about to lose his mind. “I don’t think you understand–”  

“I think I do.” Wonwoo moves his face and Soonyoung turns to finally look at him. His eyes are darker than usual, calm but with a glint of amusement. He’s devastatingly handsome. “I’m okay, dumbass.”  

His hand moves on Soonyoung’s chest in circles, threatening to go lower but only grazing the top of his abs. Soonyoung closes his eyes with a groan and presses back, giving in into the urge, moves his ass so that it, too, is pressed against Wonwoo’s front. Wonwoo doesn’t react, and isn’t that mortifying, given that Soonyoung is already trembling.  

“How are you so calm about all of this?” he pants.  

Wonwoo chuckles. “I’m kinda freaking out, actually,” he confesses.  

Soonyoung looks at him again, his sheepish, timid smile. His gentle eyes. Wonwoo raises his free hand to lower Soonyoung’s mask, and for a crazy, heavenly instant, Soonyoung thinks he’s about to get kissed, but then Wonwoo grabs his face, squishing his cheeks. Soonyoung whines and he just laughs before abruptly getting up, leaving Soonyoung cold and unstable.  

“Let’s go.”  

Soonyoung stays still, not following, until Wonwoo wiggles his brows and he finally gets it. He's never moved faster in his life.  

Despite the gym being empty – perk of being celebrities, they can go and work out after closing hours – Wonwoo still drags him behind the lockers, so that they wouldn’t be immediately seen by someone who happened to step into the changing room. It doesn’t really help in making them subtle anyway, not with Soonyoung’s loud moan as Wonwoo crushes his front against the wall.  

“Like this?”  

“Please,” Soonyoung breathes, shuddering as Wonwoo’s arms come to brace against the wall on either side of his shoulders. This– this is exactly what Soonyoung wanted. Being caged in by Wonwoo, feeling him all along his body, his weight fully pinning him down. Soonyoung briefly wonders how would it be, being in this position but laying down on a bed, but he doesn’t have the time to dwell too much on that thought, that his knees almost give up when Wonwoo shoves a hand inside his pants and wraps it around his dick.  

“You’re so hard already,” Wonwoo half pants and half laughs.  

Soonyoung would like to retort with something clever, but Wonwoo starts stroking him and the last braincells that were still active definitely die. He plants the hands against the wall trying to support himself, legs weak with how good Wonwoo’s hand feels around him, his hips jerking at every brush of Wonwoo’s fingers on him. It’s as good as the other time, no, even better with how Wonwoo’s body is pressed against every inch of Soonyoung’s.  

Wonwoo moves fast and nice, twists his hand in a way that makes Soonyoung tremble, the empty room filled with his moans and the wet, obscene sounds of Wonwoo’s hand moving up and down on his leaking cock.  

“Why are you so loud all the time?” Wonwoo mutters against his nape, his breath tickling the sensitive area behind Soonyoung’s ear. Soonyoung moans again, hips bucking forward, and then Wonwoo’s free hand is pressed firmly on his mouth, trying to muffle the sounds coming from it. Soonyoung feels his eyes rolling back. Fuck, that’s hot.  

He fucks his hips up into Wonwoo’s hand, sharp, uncoordinated thrusts, and widens his eyes as a new wave of arousal runs through his body when his ass meets with Wonwoo’s crotch, feeling him hard. Just from touching Soonyoung and hearing him moan.   

Wonwoo, however, immediately moves back so that his pelvis isn’t touching him, hand faltering around Soonyoung, losing his rhythm. Soonyoung lets out a frustrated groan, removes his mouth from Wonwoo’s hand enough to growl, “no, no, you too.” And then he blindly moves a hand behind until he manages to grab him by the hip and pushes him flush against his back once again. He relishes in Wonwoo’s hiss.  

“I don’t want to dirty my clothes,” he murmurs lamely.  

Soonyoung huffs. “We’re at the gym, I’m sure you brought some spare clothes.” He grinds his ass back for good measure, and Wonwoo retaliates by twisting his hand right at the head of his dick and silencing him again with the other.  

Soonyoung doesn’t mind, not when Wonwoo has resumed his strokes and when he can feel him rocks his hips against him, the hard length moving erratically on his clothed ass. Wonwoo feels so alive against him, burning with heat, he who usually runs so cold, and Soonyoung feels feverish, moves his hips back and forward, alternatively chasing Wonwoo’s dick and his hand, trying to get pleasure from both of them at the same time.  

Wonwoo tightens his grip, massages the tip of Soonyoung’s dick with his thumb as he noses the side of his neck before licking a wet trail along it. He strokes him again and again, thumbing at his slit in a way that makes Soonyoung’s forehead drop heavily against the wall, heat pooling in his lower body. Wonwoo takes his earlobe into his mouth and sucks on it while thrusting his hips with force and pressing Soonyoung’s body completely flushed against the wall, and that’s what sends him over the edge. He comes abruptly, violently, mouth open in a silent scream, drooling all over Wonwoo’s hand, his come dripping down onto his pants, on the floor.  

His legs are about to give up but the mere force of Wonwoo’s thrusts manages to keep him standing, and if he hadn’t just come so hard, Soonyoung would be already down for a round two, with the way Wonwoo is moving towards his release and with these soft noises he’s making. Soonyoung grinds back at the best of his current abilities, murmuring words of encouragement, until Wonwoo stills for a second and comes with a low moan, biting down at the junction between Soonyoung’s neck and shoulder.  

Wonwoo stays like this for a while, hands still on Soonyoung and face buried in his neck, trying to catch his breath. When he steps back, Soonyoung represses a shiver from the sudden cold and finally turns to look at him. He kind of expected for his gaze to be reciprocated, but Wonwoo is currently busy squinting alternatively at his hands, one dirtied by Soonyoung’s come, the other full of his saliva.  

Wonwoo grimaces, his brows furrowed in an almost sad way. “I feel gross.”  

Soonyoung lets out a strangled laugh, leaning back to the wall to support himself, legs still feeling like jelly. Other than his disgusting hands, Wonwoo looks like nothing happened, if not for some small details Soonyoung is only noticing now. The faint perspiration along his hairline. The front of his pants slightly damp.   

This time, too, Soonyoung didn’t manage to see his face when he came.  

He follows Wonwoo into the showers without a word, feels slightly relieved when they get each into their own stall. He currently doesn’t trust himself in being in close proximity with a naked, wet Wonwoo, and he’s also starting to feel a bit scared because it’s still not clear where they stand. It’s entirely possible that, for Wonwoo, this was a one-time thing, to indulge Soonyoung and let him out of his – horny – misery.  

However… that’s not what Soonyoung wants.  

He leaves the shower some time after Wonwoo, so that, when Soonyoung gets to his locker, wrapped into two towels, Wonwoo is already half-dressed. Again, maybe it’s better this way.  

“Wonwoo-yah.”  

Wonwoo makes an interrogative noise while still looking for something inside his bag.  

“Are we okay?”  

Wonwoo looks at him narrowing his eyes in a way that makes him look suspicious but it’s just because he still hasn’t put his glasses on. Soonyoung stops his brain from thinking he’s cute.  

“Of course.” He turns back to his bag but then immediately looks at Soonyoung once again, frowning. “Wait, are you okay?”  

Soonyoung nods, hastily starting to get dressed himself. He keeps the towels over him like a tent, suddenly self-conscious of his bare body. It’s stupid.  

“Yeah, I’m okay. It’s just…” he takes a deep breath, thinking back at Jihoon’s words. Wonwoo is his best friend, he can be honest with him. And, to be fair, Soonyoung can’t keep going like this.  

“Can we…” he swallows loudly. “Can we do this again, sometime?”  

Soonyoung squeezes his eyes shut, bracing for the answer.  

After a few seconds of dead silence, he yelps when two fingers clamp down on his nose, pinching it. He opens his eyes to see Wonwoo right in front of him looking amused.  

“Yeah,” ha answers, voice low that makes Soonyoung shiver. “We can do that.”  

Then he goes back to dress himself, and Soonyoung blinks once, twice, stupidly. He can hear Jihoon’s voice in his mind, singing I fucking told you .  

Not that Soonyoung is complaining, but this is all so weird. He says it out loud, and Wonwoo immediately retorts, an automatic response, “you’re weird.” Like a six years old.  

Soonyoung points a finger at him. “You’re supposed to be the rational one here! Why are you agreeing to everything so fast, without thinking?!”  

Wonwoo wears his glasses, now fully dressed. “You know, not everybody needs days to think about stuff.”  

Soonyoung huffs, feeling attacked.  

“I’ve thought about it.” Wonwoo steps forward, getting nearer. “And I have decided that it’s okay.”  

He’s so close, face mere inches apart from Soonyoung’s. Soonyoung inhales sharply, dizzy under those intense eyes, hands itching with the need to touch. He’s pretty sure he’s about to get kissed and he can’t fucking wait for it.  

What happens instead – of course – is Wonwoo flicking is forehead with all the strength of his pretty, slender fingers. Soonyoung wails in pain and Wonwoo laughs at the profanities coming out from his mouth.   

“Hurry up, I’m starving,” Wonwoo says, getting to the door.  

Despite his intense desire to kick his ass – and then do something else with it – Soonyoung puts on his padded jacket at the speed of light and follows Wonwoo through the door.  

“You know you’re paying for dinner, right?”  

This time, Soonyoung kicks him for real, but doesn’t say anything back. A person can’t be Jeon Wonwoo’s friend since ninth grade and expect him to pay in a moment like this.   

Soonyoung is okay, though. He’s more than okay.