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I tap my foot in time with the metronome. I lift my violin to my chin and bring up my bow. I slide it along the strings, practicing my scales one more time. Then I start on the piece.
It sucks. I mean, it’s beautiful, but it’s so difficult that I can’t even begin to imagine how the composer came up with it. It’s like it was created just to spite me. It uses 15 different notes in just the first half, and it’s 5 pages long! I’m thankful every day that I don’t play a wind instrument.
My elbows are exhausted, my chin hurts, and the sheet music is burned into the back of my eyelids. I want to take a break, but I know I can’t. We’re performing this piece soon. It has to be perfect.
I keep going, sliding through each measure. My vision gets so blurry at one point that the notes seem to slide off the staffs and down the page. But, I fight through and keep going.
Eventually, I’ve run through the piece 5 times without any mistakes. It’s not a guarantee that I’ll be perfect, but it’s damn close and as close as I’m going to get.
“Baz?”
I turn around in my seat to find Simon leaning against the entrance to the hallway. He smiles at me, before rubbing his eyes and yawning.
“Baz, it’s 2 in the morning. Don’t you think you’ve done enough?”
I frown. “There’s no such thing as enough practice. I can always improve.”
He comes over to me, taking my violin and bow away from me and setting them inside the case. “The music will still be there when you wake up. Baby, you need to come to bed.”
I look back at the sheet music, the notes and staffs glaring back at me. Maybe… maybe a small break won’t hurt. I’ll sleep, eat something, and come back to it with fresh eyes.
I sigh. “Maybe it’s for the best.” I stand up and follow Simon into our bedroom. I change into pajamas and lay down, nearly falling asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow.
I feel Simon sneak in behind me, wrapping his arms around me and holding me close. I smile to think about how lucky I am to have him with me all the time. He kisses the back of my neck and I snuggle into him.
I fall asleep, perfectly content.