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Then things started to click into place: the increasing amount you had been pailing yourself, the lessening of satisfaction with each pailing, the way a touch from your matespirit would wake a piece of your skin as though part of a ghost had become solid for a rare minute. The visions of your imagination confused you, and you realized with a shock.
Your name is Kanaya Maryam and you are in heat for the first time of your life.