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"What's the matter?"
Björn lets her into the house, cooing Linda in his arms. The toddler looks skittish but as soon as she recognizes Frida she reaches forward with her little hands grasping the air.
The brunette opens her arms and takes the child who immediately clutches her shirt and whimpers as if she had been waiting for someone to share her silent distress.
"Agnetha is sick. Like, really sick. I think she has the seasonal flu or something.", Björn explains, checking inside the bag he's holding.
He searches underneath a few folded clothes but he seems to be missing something.
Frida's stomach drops, the concern for her best friend immediately erasing everything else from her mind. She wishes she had arrived sooner and she wishes she knew about the situation because now she's here with nothing but a homemade cake. When Björn had called and asked her and Benny to come over she had thought that he probably had another song ready or wanted their opinions on a refrain. He hadn't even mentioned that it was an emergency.
"Do you need me to stay with her?", she asks in a heartbeat, already determined to not leave this house until Agnetha gets better.
"That would be terrific. Our family doctor said that we should take Linda to her grandparents to make sure she doesn't get sick too.", he keeps searching under the sofa until he finally picks up a small pacifier and throws it into the bag.
"Benny is still parking. Tell him to drive you instead of taking your car because we might need it.", she shuffles Linda's hair and rocks her gently before placing a small kiss on her nose. "Don't worry little one, your mom is going to be just fine."
The toddler doesn't understand but the small peck makes her smile a little and Frida is glad that she doesn't look so fearful anymore.
Björn takes his daughter from the brunette's arms and thanks her quickly before hanging the bag on his shoulder and shutting the door behind him.
Frida runs up the stairs, guiding herself through the familiar hall of the second floor and finally reaching the master bedroom.
The door is half open and an intense fit of coughing can be heard from inside.
Oh, my poor Anna.
She opens the door and instantly runs to her best friend, who is struggling to breathe and looks exhausted. Her eyes are half-shut, her shoulders quivering.
"Dear?", Frida whispers, trying not to startle the blonde.
Agnetha opens her eyes and as soon as she recognizes the brunette she beams weakly.
"Hi my little flare.", she mumbles.
Frida's heart flutters at the nickname the younger woman has given her, because "You're like fire on stage, no one can compare." is still the best compliment she's received from anyone.
She sits on the bed, reaches out and strokes Agnetha's forehead, swiping her fringe and gasping at the temperature.
"You're burning up.", she remarks, "Maybe we should go to the hospital."
Her best friend's eyes widen in horror and Frida can only admire the way the frenzy of the fever makes them look like glowing oceans. Even sick, Agnetha is the most stunning woman the brunette has ever seen, but of course she can not tell her that considering it means something entirely different to her than it would to the blonde.
"Oh my god, no!", the younger woman protests but the effort makes her fall into another surge of coughing. "I'm fine."
Frida rolls her eyes at her best friend's superfluous reaction. She knows Agnetha absolutely hates being sick, doctors, hospitals and especially medicines.
She can't help but fidget in worry though.
"Did you take anything for the fever?"
The blonde stares up at her, momentarily contemplating the question.
"I took an aspirin for my head.", she concludes, making Frida shake her head in disbelief.
"That's it, I'm running to the drugstore.", she tries to get up but Agnetha's hand is quick to catch her.
"Please don't. I don't need anything except you.", she asserts, stroking her fingers against Frida's knuckles.
The brunette's heart spurts into flips and twirls and before she realizes it her strict complexion is gone and she's fully surrendered to the blonde's warm gaze.
She smiles and kisses the fingers that are wrapped around her own, making her best friend giggle.
How she loves making her happy...
"You haven't won. Just so you know.", she declares, climbing on the bed and resting her head on Agnetha's shoulder before wrapping an arm around her. "I'm gonna get you some medicine in a little while."
Agnetha scoffs but she rests on Frida's head, nuzzling her face in the brunette's hair.
"Whatever you say."
For a while they cuddle in silence, listening to each other's breathing and playing with each other's fingers.
Frida doesn't know how much time they spend like that-it could be hours-but she is happy, she is so happy she could sing and she wonders what the woman beside her is thinking. She's probably grateful for having someone with her while she's sick because Agnetha can't stand the illness and having to endure it all by herself would be dreadful.
Frida wishes she could be here every single time her best friend gets sick and she wishes she could take care of her all the time, ill or not.
There we go again...
"I have to tell you something.", Agnetha breaks the silence, yanking the brunette away from her thoughts.
Her voice is even weaker than before and Frida raises her head to check on her, searching her eyes for signs of a higher temperature than the one they can manage with.
"What is it?", she asks in alarm but Agnetha just smiles. She takes Frida's hand and places it on her warm cheek, sighing in contentment at the contact.
Frida's mouth dries up and she swallows quickly, tilting her head in confusion.
"I think I'm in love with you.", the blonde whispers, giggling softly and Frida's breath gets caught in her throat.
"Oh, Anna. You need to take something. Where is your thermometer?", she asks, already moving to break their embrace but Agnetha pulls her back and frowns adorably.
"I'm serious. Don't you believe me?", she blinks a few times, evidently suffering the effects of a high fever.
Frida doesn't know how to answer, she doesn't know how to react because her stupid heart is actually trying to spot a small fraction of truth in her best friend's words and she can't let that happen.
"You're very sick.", she sighs, swiping a few strands of her away from her face.
She hasn't counted how many times she has wished to hear those words from Agnetha but she knows this is not exactly her speaking right now.
"That doesn't matter because I-" she stops in her tracks, shutting her eyes in discomfort and Frida gets up quickly, helping her sit straight on the bed.
"Shh, don't drain yourself. I'm gonna go get something quickly."
"No.", the blonde moans stubbornly, coughing and touching her forehead. "I'm fine."
Frida has the urge to scold her, to accuse her of neglecting herself, to take her into her arms and never let her go.
Had she meant it? Or had it just been a hazy moment?
"I'm gonna get you a wet cloth and some pills and that's the end of this conversation.", she composes herself, pulling away from the younger woman and leaving the room promptly.
She rests on a wall for a little bit, calming her mind and heart and she admonishes herself for getting her hopes up.
Agnetha is sick and she had probably thought Frida was Björn from the way she had laid with her on the bed.
She hurries downstairs and prepares a bowl with water and ice cubes along with a handkerchief and a bottle of febrifuge syrup-the only thing she had luckily found in Agnetha's medicine cabinet-and then returns to her best friend.
"I'm not drinking that. I only have it for Linda.", the blonde clarifies as soon as she sees the bottle, like there's nothing more to be discussed between them.
Frida groans and watches the handkerchief sinking in the water as she sets the bowl on the nightstand.
"I can't bear to see you like this. Will you please drink it?", she asks in her most gentle voice, brushing her hand against the younger woman's back. "For me?"
She knows Agnetha prefers homemade remedies but she's in no position to experiment like that.
The blonde looks at her as if she's committed a crime and Frida knows that she's close to gaining a victory.
"I hate it when you do this. You know I can't say no when you ask like that.", she easily surrenders and the brunette does a little celebratory dance internally.
She fills the spoon with syrup and Agnetha opens her mouth in defeat, accepting the medicine.
Frida smiles and spreads the wet handkerchief on the blonde's forehead, eliciting a sigh of relief from the woman.
"That's better isn't it?", she whispers, her free hand once again stroking the delicate fingers that are wrapped around her palm.
"Yeah.", Agnetha admits, opening her eyes and making direct eye contact with the brunette. "You know, Björn tried to get me to take it but I wouldn't. I guess he knew you were the only one who would succeed in this mission."
Frida avoids the blonde's eyes, trying to keep her mind calm.
Agnetha says this kind of things often and the brunette always gets her hopes up despite trying not to. She knows what they have is a very pure and precious friendship and there's no room for anything else beyond that.
They're both married and settled and whatever Frida thinks she's feeling is probably just a gigantic amount of love for her best friend.
She's just confused.
All women have thought of kissing their female friends at least once, right?
"Well, of course I have a bigger influence on you my sweet. I'm your best friend, he's just a man.", Frida jokes, turning the handkerchief over so the cold side of it can soothe the younger woman.
"My best friend...", Agnetha mumbles, as if lost in thought.
"Who you're in love with, apparently.", Frida chuckles but as soon as it leaves her mouth, she regrets it terribly.
It's too stupid of her to fool around with this idea.Too dangerous to even bring up such things.
Agnetha is not laughing or smiling and the brunette panics, realizing that she's probably messed up.
What was she thinking about?
"Hey, it was a joke.", Frida reassures quickly, patting her best friend's shoulder, trying to get them out of this weird situation, to fix her foolish mistake.
"Yeah, I know.", Agnetha murmurs, the gleam in her eyes slowly evaporating.
Frida curses her big mouth and her stupid abnormal feelings and moves closer to the blonde, wetting the small cloth and putting it back on her. She plants a small kiss on her shoulder, desperate to bring things between them back to normal and Agnetha lets her head rest on her best friend, possibly letting her know that everything is fine.
A few minutes pass before one of them moves again and Frida is the one to break the stillness, switching the cloth on the younger woman's forehead.
When she returns to their light embrace, she feels a small drop of something on her hand which is now resting on Agnetha's neck.
She raises her head, only to discover that her best friend is crying, silently sniffling and wetting her cheeks.
She pulls away immediately, forgetting the cloth and placing her hands on each side of the other woman's face.
Agnetha refuses to look her in the eye, her glassy vision drifting anywhere else but the brunette's face.
"What's wrong ? Are you in any pain?", Frida's concern is fully coating her voice and she needs Agnetha to look at her because what if what's tormenting her is not something physical?
What if she had been the one to mess up and hurt her favorite person in the entire world?
"It's nothing, really.", the blonde tries but the words come out choked and weak, voice cracking. "I just get really emotional whenever I'm sick. Thank you for taking care of me."
She's still not making eye contact and Frida is certain she'll go crazy if she doesn't discern what's actually going on. However, she's not going to push her luck any more this evening.
"Of course my dear. I'm here for you, whenever you need me.", she assures, caressing the soft blonde hair she has lovingly stroked so many times before.
Agnetha seems to get even mushier over her words and Frida gasps at the sob that escapes her best friend's lips.
"God, why do you have to be so perfect?", the blonde whimpers between tears and Frida is now truly worried about the woman in her arms.
"Okay, you're starting to scare me. What did I do?", she asks in concern, wanting to take the blonde back into her arms but hesitating.
"It's everything you do. You're always so caring and sweet. I can not find a single flaw to convince myself to stop...", she pauses, stumbling over her own words.
"To stop what?", Frida asks in a single breath, wanting, needing to hear...she doesn't even know what.
Agnetha seems to reconsider finising her statement and the brunette wants to beg her to please say it because right now she doesn't know if she can hold herself back anymore.
"Nevermind.", the younger woman says, hiding her face in her hands and shaking her head.
"No.", Frida utters, refusing to let this moment pass without any kind of confrontation between them. "Please talk to me. Whatever it is, you can say it.", she pulls Agnetha's hands away from her face and strokes her damp cheeks with light fingers.
The blonde finally looks up at her, blue eyes glistening and emitting a strange but compelling emotion.
"No...I can't...", she mumbles softly, her eyes falling to Frida's mouth and the brunette holds her breath in anticipation, not knowing exactly what she is expecting but wishing and praying that this isn't some kind of misconception.
They both lean in at the same time, brushing their foreheads together and resting there, waiting for something, waiting for the first move.
None of them is bold enough to make it.
Frida senses Agnetha's warmness radiating from her body and she feels like wrapping herself around the blonde and never letting her go.
"Do it.", the brunette whispers, begging the younger woman to initiate what she hopes they both want more than anything else right now.
Agnetha takes a small harsh breath before leaning forward and slowly placing the softest peck on Frida's lips, trying out this new but cozy sentiment.
Frida's breath halts, her eyes fall shut and her arms slide over the blonde's shoulders, embracing her gently.
She's entirely dumbfounded by what she's experiencing. She never-not in her wildest dreams- believed that her illicit thoughts about her best friend would someday stop being just thoughts.
Stirred by the spark of the moment, the brunette presses against the woman in her arms and captures her lips with her own, kissing her firmly. She kisses her like she used to kiss her husband back when she was madly in love with him. She tilts her head to the side for better access and tangles her fingers through her best friend's blonde strands, making her gasp against her mouth.
Agnetha's lips are hot from the fever and Frida feels like she's burning, like they're both burning, a spurt of flames encircling them and scorching everything around them.
The blonde is hesitant at first, but as soon as she feels Frida's fingers on her lower neck she opens her mouth, accepting the fierce kisses she's being offered and reciprocating with appetite.
Frida feels the warmness cramming her, invading her entire body and spreading through her wholly. She's the happiest she's been in a long time and she never wants this moment to end.
She knows what they're doing is wrong, she knows they should stop and never do, or even talk about it again but right now she wants nothing more than to dismiss the voice of reason trying to ruin the moment she'd been dreaming of for so long.
When they finally pull away, they're both flushed, their noses tenderly brushing against one another, their breaths quick and sharp.
"Oh, Anna...", the brunette whispers, incapable of holding back the smile that threatens to take over her face.
Agnetha shuts her eyes again, bringing her hands to each side of Frida's neck.
"My little flare, what are we doing?", the blonde asks weakly, evidently unwilling to let go of the older woman.
"Do you want to stop?", Frida asks fearfully, not really prepared to hear the answer.
The blonde looks back at her, the same fear mirrored in her eyes. "No. Do you?", she questions so quietly that it's barely heard.
Frida shakes her head negatively and pulls the blonde back in for a quick but tender peck before hugging her abruptly. She caresses the younger woman's back, rocking them back and forth gently.
Maybe this is a dream.
Nevertheless, Frida will take it.
She'll take anything if it means that she gets to feel this way for a moment more, even if everything she has right now shatters in a minute.
"I don't ever want to stop.", the brunette clarifies, burying her face into the blonde cascade of hair that smells like lemons and candy and reminds her of home.
She's done with running away from home.
"I'm scared.", Agnetha mumbles.
Frida's heart cracks a little upon hearing the fear coating her best friend's voice. She wants to reassure her and hold her like this for hours and tell her that everything will be okay because they have each other, but she knows that's not what the blonde needs to hear right now because it's not entirely true.
The brunette knows that this, whatever it is, will never be something more than what it is now. This beautiful discovery between the two of them is something that can never progress, that can never change. She doesn't even know if her best friend wants something more but judging by how hard she's clutching Frida's shirt, they're both on the same page.
"Me too.", she admits, never pulling away from their embrace. "But I'm happy.", she admits, kissing the side of Agnetha's head.
She feels the younger woman pulling her impossibly closer and she thinks she can still feel her trembling in quiet sobs.
"I'm happy too. So happy.", the blonde's voice cracks.
Frida keeps swaying them slowly and when she finally pulls away several minutes later, she takes hold of Agnetha's face, wiping her tears with a shaking thumb.
"Please stop crying.", she begs, not bearing to see her like this for another second.
The blonde smiles through the tears and leans in to kiss her again and Frida completely melts into it, laughing between kisses.
"Oh, I'm gonna get you infected.", Agnetha giggles, tracing the brunette's lips with her finger.
"You already have.", Frida whispers, bringing their mouths together once again.