Chapter Text
"Tell me about burr holes."
Lucas' eyebrows creased. He didn't mishear his uncle nor lack the knowledge, he was just confused about why in the world he was having a neuro quiz when his other uncle was unconscious on the floor, and Derek had just stated that he was going to sustain permanent brain damage in the next couple of minutes. "What?"
"Burr holes." Derek repeated, checking his pupil dilation again. With an unconscious patient, there wasn't much more he could do in terms of making an assessment.
"Uh- burr holes." He muttered as he tried his best to recall his textbook. "Small holes drilled into the skull to decrease ICP that comes from blood or- or fluid that causes compression. From- uh, in this case from the dura meninges...a suspected epidural hematoma which commonly uh- presents with uh- a lucid period then LOC-" He listed off, speaking faster than his mind could process.
"Great, you're my assist."
"Assist? What? What am I-" He started, confused before getting cut off by Derek shout.
"Ewan, find me a drill with a wide bit. Mom, I need you to get a knife, a razor and as much hand sanitizer as possible - or alcohol if you don't have that. Nance, Lucas, get him inside."
"What? Why?" Ewan asked, confused. He didn't have a medical background, unlike the others, so had no idea that that was the equipment (or rather makeshift home-item alternatives) used for a burr hole.
"He'll either be dead or so brain damaged that he might as well be dead in thirty-seven minutes so..." Derek sighed as he reached for his chair to transfer back up. "I guess I'm gonna have to fix him here."
He knew how much it hurt his mother to take the table cloth off of the dining room table. She had managed to keep the same oak table in prestine condition for the last 50 years by simply changing the cloth every couple of weeks, and, for the first time, it was cloth free.
Then again, she had never had her son-in-law lying across the table either. Dying across the table.
"You know what you're doing, right?" Ewan questioned, worried.
"Derek is the best neurosurgeon in the entire world, this is easy to him." Lucas replied very quickly, and a little defensively too.
"It'd be easy if we were in a hospital." Derek noted. "But we're not."
"You can still do it though, right?"
"Look away now." Derek stated, ignoring the question. It wasn't Ewan's fault that he was worried; he had no clue what was going on, while Nancy had done burr holes in her internship and residency, and their mom had seen thousands of them done, even if he presumed she'd never done one herself.
"What?" Ewan asked, pulling his hand away from his mouth to stop biting at his nails.
"Blood." He explained as he drenched his scalp in gel before picking up Ewan's drill. Carolyn had soaked it in water and soap while Ed was moved from the garden to the living room which wasn't great, but it was the best he was going to get. Luckily, the drill bit looked new anyway.
"Derek, we could just take the car-" Carolyn tried to suggest as the situation got more real.
"In the traffic? With no sirens? With speed limits? On New Year's Eve?"
Carolyn sighed. "If we call 9-1-1 again, then maybe they could redivert one because of how serious th-" She paused when the drilled started. "Derek!"
"Lucas, use that to-" Derek started, ignoring his mother. Luckily, Lucas already knew what he was going to request. "Mmm mmm. Yeah, good."
Lucas smiled at the compliment, even if was a short, in-the-moment murmur. He was painfully aware that it was his uncle he was doing surgery on, but he was still happy that he had done something right, considering his track record. This wasn't in class either; this was real medicine. And it felt so damn good.
Nancy, Carolyn, nor Ewan could believe...this. Brain surgery on the living room table. A new-to-medicine teen second assisting a neurogod. Carolyn's son operating on his brother-in-law with his nephew.
He glanced up to Lucas. "You ready for this?"
"Uh- think so." He faltered, voice shaking. He had dissected a lung, and a fish, and watched a brain dissection, but that was the closest he had ever got to the insides of a human body before. Now, he was about to help drill a hole in a skull. How could he ever be ready for this?
"Confidence Dr Adams." Derek instructed.
He swallowed, shoving his worries out of his mind. That's what good surgeons did, and that's what he wanted to be. "Yes, I'm ready, Dr Shepherd."
"Unkle Dewek?" Lucas called as he walked into the lounge, a plastic brief-case-like box in his hand.
"Mmm?"
He paused infront of him. "What do you do?"
"As a job?"
"You're doctor, like Mama?" He asked as he placed it on the floor, only to flick it open to a set of medical supplies. He held the stethoscope up to his uncle. "Wiv dis one? I'm good at dis."
He nodded. "Yeah, I am a doctor, but I'm a brain doctor so I don't use that that one a lot."
"Brain hurt?"
"Yeah. I'm who you call when you hit your noggin." He explained, ruffling the boy's hair.
"If no stethyscope, does that mean you no wanna play doctors wiv me?" He asked, frowning with watery eyes.
Derek smiled. "Of course I'll play doctors with you Lucas! In fact, maybe you can help me improve my stethoscope skills."
"Pupils are-" He paused as he ran his phone's flashlight over Ed's eyes. "-both equal and reactive."
"You. Are. A. Freaking. God." Lucas stated as Derek sighed, ripping off his blood-soaked gloves.
"Not sure we have to go that far Lucas." Derek muttered as he sat back in his chair. There was nothing else he could do but wait. "I know I'm good and all but-"
"Derek Shepherd: God." He repeated with a strong, accented tone.
"Hey Mer. You're probably busy putting the kids down, don't worry about calling back unless you want to, but-" He sighed, looking up to the ambulance as its sirens started and it pulled away from the house. "Ed has an epidural bleed from the accident with the kids earlier. Nance is going to drive me in to the hospital so I'll be home late, maybe tomorrow morning. I think he's fine though...I did burrs when his ICP went through the roof so hopefully I'll just be there for support until he's out of the woods. I'll send updates whenever I can. Love you."
"You really think he's going to be okay?" Lucas asked as Derek pulled the phone away from his ear and slid it back into his pocket.
He sighed. "These things...I don't know, if I'm honest.
"Did you have one of those too?"
"One of what?"
"A brain bleed." He elaborated timidly, eyes focusing to his chair for the first time since he had got there. Sure, he glanced at it, but he hadn't looked.
"Subdural."
"And you're okay now, right? I mean, you got better?"
"Yeah. I'm fine now. But...we just don't know. Even if we had the same type of brain bleed, that doesn't really help us predict his outcome."
Lucas sighed as he looked away from his uncle, eyes finding the sky as another firework went off. "You know-"
"Mmm?" Derek pushed, intrigued.
"-it's a really beautiful night."
"Well, New Year's normally is with all the fireworks so I'm not-" He paused when he analyzed the look on his face. He wanted the catchphrase. Of course he did. "Oh. Lucas. Really?"
"Please?" He begged with his most convincing puppy dog eyes.
"No. You can say it when you're a surgeon. You can hear me say it if you watch me do surgery. But not now."
"You really think I'm gonna make it?" He asked genuinely.
"Dr Adams, you just helped me drill a hole in your uncle's skull as a pre-med and did great; do you really think you're going to fail?"
"How long do you think we have to wait?" Lucas asked, placing his head in his hands and letting one finger play with his curls.
"I uh- I'll go and ask them if we can see him now." Ewan stated as he stood, and headed down the hall. The whole thing felt like something he shouldn't be there for, but Carolyn had insisted that he joined them. He had known all five children since before they were even born, but he wasn't really part of it.
"She's freaking out. I know she's freaking out." Carolyn muttered, hands wringing. Derek was surprised she wasn't pacing; she loved pacing when she was worried. "God, I wish I could be there for her right now. She shouldn't have to drive like this."
"Mmm." Nancy agreed. "I imagine she'll probably have a speeding ticket or two after this."
"What do you think they're doing?" Carolyn inquired, glancing down the hall that led to Ed's room.
"Well his ICP definitely decreased with the burr, but there's a massive risk of infection so probably...saline washout and antibiotics? They've got to check through his CT and I imagine they're running an EEG right now."
"But- the risk of infection he...he would have died otherwise, right?" Lucas asked, lifting his head up.
"We did the right thing Lucas, I promise. No way he would have survived the thirty-five minutes it took for the ambulance to get there, even if they were a whole two minutes earlier." Derek reassured him with his most convincing smile.
"Hey-" Ewan greeted as he returned, a slight smile on his face. "He's okay. They said the scans and tests and stuff were really good. We can see him as soon as we want."
"We should wait until Kathleen gets here-" Carolyn glanced at her watch. "Hopefully, she should be here really soon."
"It was...admittedly, pretty cool." Nancy said in a small voice. Now that she knew Ed was going to be okay, it was less insensitive to say that.
"Not something a guy who was limited by his disability would be able to do, right? He'd struggle to do that, and I didn't, which makes me not who you thought I was, right? Right, don't you think?" Derek replied with a persuasive kind of smirk.
She sighed at her brother's verbal prodding.
"What are you two on about now?" Carolyn asked, looking between her kids.
"Nance has reached enough acceptance to get over the fact that I can't walk, but she thinks my lack of said skill is preventing me from uh- reaching my full potential, I guess."
"Can you do everything you used to be able to do? No. That means your full potential can't be reached. Simple. I'm not saying your life is crappy because of it, I'm just saying that you keep going on and on and on and on about how your life is better than before, but that's physically impossible."
"I'm a dad, a husband, a surgeon...and a paraplegic, but, if anything, being a surgeon means that I can't be with my kids or my wife as much as I want, not being a paraplegic. My lack of full potential is because there are only 24 hours in a day and the average human only lives 70 odd years."
She sighed. "We're never gonna stop this cycle, are we?"
"Maybe if you chose to stop too then-" Derek started with a convincing raise of his eyebrows, only to pause when he was interrupted.
"Derek?" Kathleen called, simply because he was the most recognizable from down a hallway.
He turned to see his sister stood frozen in the middle of the hallway. There were no recent tears dropping down her face, but he could tell that she had been crying before. "Kathleen-"
"Tell me he's okay. Please. Please, tell me he's okay."
"We had an update a minute ago, he's fine and you can see him. We just wanted to wait for you."
"Oh- okay- I'll uh- can I-" She stumbled.
"Of course. Room 21457. At the end of the hall and then-" Derek didn't even finish before Kathleen ran off to see her husband.
"Hey." Kathleen greeted as Derek entered the room by her request. Or rather, Carolyn's request on Kathleen's behalf when she returned to the waiting area; the hospital had a strict two-visitor policy, and they couldn't bend it unlike Derek did so frequently at Grey Sloan.
"Mom...Mom said you did a burr hole on the dining room table with a drill. You're absolutely mad." She stated before sniggering, despite the fact that more tears spilled out of her eyes. She stood from Ed's side, releasing his hand.
"Yeah. I-" He tried. He was forced to stop speaking when Kathleen hugged him. Tight. So freaking tight that he couldn't breathe.
"God- thank you." She said through a whimper he hadn't heard since she was about nine. "Thank you so, so much."
He sucked one heavy breath in and out when she released him and his lungs could finally expand. "It is my job as a big brother to protect you from hurt Kathleen and I...that's all I was doing."
"If there's anything - anything - I can do to thank you."
He grinned a little. "Well..."
"No. Not that." She denied, knowing what he was going to say from the look on his face.
"You said anything. In fact, you said it twice to accent your point." Derek pointed out with the same convincing kind of smirk.
"But not that." She denied, sitting back down in the seat besides Ed with her arms crossed over her chest.
"Accept it. Right now."
"That is not how acceptance works Derek!"
"It's gonna have to be." He muttered. He didn't want anything else as a thank-you present.
"Derek, you can't just tell me to-"
"No hating the chair. No telling me that my life is terrible because of it. No telling me that Jason deserved to die. No helping me unless I ask for it. Oh- and you have to admit that it was your fault that I dropped that glass."
"Derek-" She tried to protest.
"You. Said. Anything."
She sighed. She hated her brother. So freaking much. "Yes, sure, whatever Derek. Acceptance, blah, blah."
"Thank you." He replied earnestly with a genuine smile as he placed his hands back on the rims of his chair and almost pulled himself out of the room when she spoke again.
"And uh- can I drive you back to your hotel later?"
His hands stilled. It was an odd request. "Uh...why?"
"I uh- don't want to get a parking ticket for uh- so...I kinda parked in blue badge because I was in a rush and if I get caught but say that you needed the parking because of- you know what I'm asking."
“You know why they’re like that?” Amelia pondered as she gripped the rope of the tyre swing a little tighter.
“Because they’re my sisters and they love me so seeing me in ‘pain’ makes them sad?” He suggested, both hands landing back on his lap when he was done with the air quotation marks. Everyone always seemed to think he was in pain. He wasn’t, that was the whole point of not walking.
“Pfft. No. They don’t know the joys of parking, idiot.”
Derek smirked. "Of course. But, please, never do that again."
"Hey- need anything?"
Derek shook his head before kissing his wife. Aisle chairs were hell, so he chose the front seat for the easiest transfer, which meant his wife, kids and Amelia were all sat somewhere else. It did, however, mean that they could have a private conversation without three kids to deal with for a few minutes when she visited him. "No. All good."
She smiled. Derek hadn't drunk a sip of water all morning so he wouldn't have to use the toilet on the plane, as he had done on the way there. After they landed in New York, Meredith had chucked two bottles of water his way and he had downed them in seconds. How in the world the air crew expected him to get to the toilet, she had no idea. They didn't offer anything to help. "Phew." She couldn't help but verbalise her relief.
"Don't fancy dragging me across the plane then?" He asked, sounding genuine.
"No. Not really." She answered as seriously as him before they both smirked. "God, we are going to be so tired when we get home."
"About that..." He started with both a mischievous and mysterious grin.
"Oh no." She muttered.
"Tonight, you will be driving to Tacoma-"
"Tacoma, wh-" She interjected, but stopped very quickly when her husband continued.
"-because we are going to a very, very fancy Spa Hotel."
"The kids?" She wondered, glancing back to them. Ellis was asleep in Amelia's arms, Bailey was dozing on his armrest and Zola was colouring the book of New York she had bought from the airport's gift shop.
"Sorted. Sorted before we even went to New York."
"Seriously?" She asked. God, she loved her husband.
"You said you were 'so freaking tempted' to skip the holiday and spend all night having sex in a motel. But that doesn't sound that great, if I'm honest, so we're spending three nights in a five-star hotel having sex. It has those- you know, mud bath things- oh, and the cucumber eye thingys."
"Oh, I love the cucumber eye thingys!" She teased, laughing when he pouted before kissing him to get rid of the expression. "Love you more though."
"Is this where I say, 'No! I love you more' and then you say 'No, I love you more' and-"
"I do love you Derek, but if we become that couple, I will have to kill you."
His eyes widened a little. "Noted."