Chapter Text
It’s easy to believe in fate, until it stands between you and what you want. Fate didn’t work in Yuko’s favor, and it’s only recently has she considered letting go of the bitterness that has kept her in one place.
She sits in the back of a big lecture hall, next to Fai. They’re sipping coffee, listening to Clow deliver his lecture to eager undergraduates and jaded graduates. As usual, Fai and Yuko are the most well-dressed of the bunch, except they now wear professional attire instead of the weirdest, cheapest, ugliest things they could find at a secondhand store. Fai has his hair back in a ponytail. He complimented Yuko’s pencil skirt and asked her why she wasn’t wearing a corset as a top. When she kissed his cheek, she told him, like always, that he’s the prettiest one here, and he giggled just like he used to. Neither of them is taking notes anymore, but that’s what happens when you leave academia. You are able to accept that most of what you’re listening to is garbage.
Yue is sitting at the front, next to Ashura, who introduced Clow, listing all his degrees and achievements, all of which now meaningless. Yue nodded at Fai but didn’t acknowledge Yuko when she smiled. Fai burst out laughing and rolled his eyes with her while they helped themselves to the free coffee and cookies. What a prick, Fai said, shaking his head. He hasn’t changed at all.
Clow’s face is still bruised, and if Yuko didn’t know that it was because of Kurogane, she’d assume that it was for a cool reason and that Clow hit back. Everyone looks like a pussy next to Kurogane and there’s no shame in taking a punch, but Yuko still feels contempt. If Clow hadn’t caused her such pain, she’d be more sympathetic.
As the lecture goes on, Yuko begins to feel the same sense of embarrassment she did when she read the book and realized how dumb Clow actually is. All the undergrads are completely silent, which is the ultimate sign that they are impressed. Yuko sticks another cookie in her mouth, chewing as quietly as possible while Fai looks at his work email. He has clearly checked out too, which she takes as objective proof that this is far from Clow’s best work. She swallows, feels the lump move down her throat before the free fall into her stomach.
“He’s so full of shit,” Yuko murmurs, picking up her little paper cup of coffee. Fai wheezes.
“I think he has waited literal years for you to say it,” Fai replies, “you should go tell him after.”
“No,” she replies, “I refuse to give him the satisfaction of claiming more of my time.” Fai turns and looks at her, smirking.
“That means we can go, right?”
“Yes,” she says, “we need to go drinking.”
“I’m so glad that you said that,” Fai whispers, “he’s so boring!” He speaks a little too loudly, and a few people turn and frown at them. Fai just smiles and waves them off as he stands up and picks up his coat.
“Truly,” she says, standing up too. Collects her coat and purse.
They aren’t intentionally disruptive, but neither tries to stay quiet. Fai is out the door first, but Yuko pauses. Thinks about looking back. Realizes that she doesn’t want to see Clow’s face right before she walks out of his life for good, so she follows Fai.
**
Sitting on his bed, Kurogane stares at a basket of clean laundry. He came home to deal with his apartment—clean the fridge, do his laundry, vacuum. It struck him when he was debating whether to wipe down his mirror, that he never stays here anymore. No recycling or garbage to take out, and there was a layer of dust all over his things.
It’s making him contemplate his life. Kurogane always knew that he spent a lot of time with Yuko, but he hasn’t sat down and really thought about it. Yuko never seems put out by his presence, in fact, she seems to a little sad when he tells her that he’s going home for a few days. He won’t deny it—he feels weird when he’s alone in his own bed. It’s hard to sleep without Yuko’s snoring and kicking, or Megetsu’s wheezing, or Maru and Moro curling up by his head. He’ll toss and turn until passing into sleep at some awful hour.
He reaches into his pocket, takes out his phone. Without even thinking, he calls Yuko. Wants to hear her voice, talk to her about her day even though he’s going to see her tonight.
She picks up on the fourth ring. “Hey,” he says, “how’re you?” Kurogane hopes that she’s having a good day. Recently, the question of her happiness has been weighing on him.
“I’m fine,” she replies. She sounds happy, like she has been laughing. “I’m with Fai right now. We went to see Clow’s lecture and are now drinking.” Kurogane rolls his eyes, cos of course that’s what she’s doing. At least she has Fai with her. Nothing too bad can happen if he’s around to protect her.
“Ah.” He also decides not to respond to her seeing Clow’s lecture. She knows how he feels so there’s no point in him saying anything.
“Well, I stepped outside the bar to talk,” she says, “Fai is texting Chi to see if she’ll come.”
“I’m glad that you’re not being rude.”
“You should come join us,” Yuko says, disregarding his rude remark. “We’ve ordered lots of snacks.”
“You and Fai are bottomless.” Kurogane has no idea where all the food they eat goes. Fai has the palate of a child and Yuko eats like a teenage boy. He’d have to order his own food, and they’d probably steal from him.
“You know, I was just telling Fai this a second ago,” Yuko hums, clearly drunk. “I don’t remember Clow being such an idiot. I listened to him talk for an entire hour, and all I could think was how embarrassed I am to have admired him so much.”
“That’s usually how breakups work.”
“You put Fai on a pedestal too?”
“Nope.” Kurogane always loved Fai as is. Never thought he was something that he wasn’t.
“How?” Yuko asks, sounding genuinely surprised. “He’s just so great!”
“Have you ever seen Fai try to change a lightbulb?” Kurogane scratches his jaw, stares at the back of his bedroom door. Wonders if he should bring his house robe with him instead of borrowing the old yukata that Yuko has lying around.
“No,” she replies, “I’ve never had the privilege.”
“He always forgets to turn the lamp off and unplug it. Gets on wobbly chairs to change bulbs in the ceiling.” Kurogane gets war flashbacks from all the times that he had to swoop in and save Fai from breaking his neck or being electrocuted. “When you see that, you stop assuming that a person has intelligence.”
“Well, to me, Fai is perfect.”
“I’ll let you keep the delusion.”
There’s a lull in their conversation. Kurogane decides that he’s going to take his robe with him to Yuko’s place. “When should I come pick you up?”
“You don’t even know where I am.” He can hear her smile in her voice.
“You’re going to tell me, and I’m going come get you,” he says, “when do you want that to be?”
“I want you to come out and drink with us.” Yuko hums a few notes, filling Kurogane’s ear with soft noises. “Please?”
“What about the pets?”
“Kimihiro is doing their night routine.” Yuko says, “you’re very concerned about them.” Kurogane scowls to himself, thinks about hanging up on her.
“You make it sound like it’s a bad thing.” Kurogane stands up, goes to take the robe off the hook. Puts it on the bed, starting the pile of clothes that are now going to be at Yuko’s apartment.
“I’m just making an observation,” she replies, “anyways, you’re going to come out, right?” He can hear the hope in Yuko’s voice. Why she’s so eager to see him, he’ll never know why, but it makes him feel good all over his body. Like nothing bad will ever happen again.
“Well, if you’re asking so nicely…”
“Great!” Yuko says, “I’ll send you the address. I’m freezing, so I want to go back inside.”
“Okay,” he says.
“Bye,” she says, “I’ll see you soon.” Yuko hangs up, not even having to think about it. Kurogane is still holding his phone to his ear when he hears a loud ping.
He checks his phone. Feels good when he realizes that it was Yuko, having immediately sent him the address.
**
The next night, Yuko talks Kurogane into watching one of the campy movies that makes her laugh out loud, but he personally finds disturbing. Things have been exceptionally easy for them recently. They still bicker, but nothing ever sticks. Kurogane will grumble and Yuko will roll her eyes, but affection comes easy after.
She’s wrapped up in Kurogane’s bathrobe, under which she’s wearing a thin slip, while Kurogane is in one of his crewneck sweaters and sweatpants. She hasn’t shaved her legs in a few days, and normally she’d be self-conscious of the prickly hairs, but when he reaches over and squeezes her thigh, all she does is relax more.
The thick cotton of his robe makes her feel safe cos it’s big and smells just like him. He brought it for himself but has said nothing when she wears it, which she does all the time now. Her pride wants her to believe that it’s too taunt him, but she knows better. She just wants him to be with her always.
Yuko turns her head, looks at Kurogane. He’s hunched over, shoving a large handful of popcorn into his mouth. It should be a disgusting display of greed, but all she feels, in this moment, is an incredible amount of care and gratitude. That he exists, that they’re together, and that they are going to stay together.
Kurograne, cheeks stuffed with popcorn, looks at her. Narrows his eyes. “What?” he asks, his mouth full. Yuko smiles, giggles a little even.
“I just love you, I guess.”
Yuko feels warm and happy, until Kurogane starts coughing, hand over his mouth. He leans forward, his face turning red. She doesn’t panic, but neither will she sit by and watch Kurogane have such a humiliating death. Without thinking, she reaches for the bowl of popcorn, holds it under his mouth. Strokes his back until he manages to swallow.
When he looks at her, his eyes are a little red, and there’re some tears. “Are you trying to kill me?”
“Not yet.” She sets the bowl back down on the coffee table, fighting the urge to hug him and kiss his cheeks. She has no clue when she became so soft, wonders if it’s an illness.
Kurogane eyes her, like he’s suspicious. “I think I love you too.” He reaches out, puts his hand on her cheek to anchor the moment. Swipes his thumb over her lower lip. Looks at her with incredible softness.
“You think?” Her voice is soft, restrained. Kurogane blushes a little but keeps steady.
“No, I know,” he replies, “I love you.”
The world doesn’t turn upside down, nor does she feel as if she has been struck by lightning. Maybe this is a sign that she’s totally fucked, but Yuko just feels truly at peace. Like everything will be okay now that they’ve told each other how they feel.
Kurogane’s hand falls, and he turns back to the movie. Reaches for the popcorn. Takes a big handful, put uses his other hand to stick a few pieces into his mouth this time. Using caution, now that he knows that Yuko has the capacity to say things that could make him choke and die. She waits for him to swallow, before leaning over and kissing the corner of his buttery lips. Grins stupid when she pulls away and sees the look on his face.
“Was that so hard to admit?”
“Actually,” he says, “it was. You’re that insufferable.”
Yuko can’t help it. All she does is laugh, and soon, Kurogane is wheezing beside her, neither of them having a single hope of paying attention to the movie.
**
Saying ‘I love you’ shouldn’t change things, but it does. While Kurogane would say that he has loved Yuko for some time, now that he has said it, he is free to express it without fearing how she’ll see him, because she loves him too.
They went back to bed, but they aren’t naked. Kurogane pulled off his sweater and his sweatpants are pushed down. The robe is untied and pushed away from Yuko’s body, her slip pushed up over her breasts. Kurogane is inside of her, his strokes long and even. Her eyelids flutter a little, and their breathing has synced up with his thrusts. He likes the tension between their bodies, her soft grip, the wetness that runs between them, getting everywhere.
It feels a little different this time. More charged, animal maybe. Like, he isn’t ready to be a parent, but this is the first time he has had sex with woman where the fear of pregnancy isn’t in the back of his mind. A little Yuko doesn’t seem like a demon with the potential to be even worse than the original. The idea of being complicit in throwing another sucker onto this planet doesn’t cause him distress.
Yuko is so wet, from both of them, that his penis almost glides inside of her on his next thrust. Yuko smiles up at him when he reaches bottom, and Kurogane realizes that he doesn’t want it to stop anytime soon.
He gets her attention when he pulls out, and she sits up on her elbows, indignant almost, mouth open to ask him what the fuck he thinks he’s doing while they’re being in love with each other. Kurogane doesn’t explain himself, instead, kissing her stomach, working his way down. He bites, gently, into the softness below her bellybutton, sliding two fingers into her vagina with ease.
“This okay?” he mumbles.
“Yeah,” Yuko moans, satisfied that he isn’t doing the unimaginable. The next noise that she makes comes straight from her guts, his mouth finding her clitoris, sucking back.
Her orgasm comes easy, practically spills out of her body. She sighs, body going slack, limbs soft. When Kurogane rises to penetrate her again, she opens her legs even more easily than before. She arches her back when he’s inside of her, desiring again. He leans down and kisses her, and she opens her mouth first. He holds her hand in his, presses it over her head, into the pillow. The strain feels good, and he wants to increase their intimacy. Yuko smiles at him, taking everything that he gives, asking for more.
They find a rhythm that works, and soon, it’s over. He pulls out to look at her vulva, like he wants to make sure that they made a big mess, even though he knows already, felt it happen in real time.
Kurogane lowers his body over hers, careful not to squish her. Presses his face into her neck, the classic postcoital repose of a man and woman. Their hands are still folded over each other, his arm resting over hers. He doesn’t want to move.
Yuko cups the back of his head with her free hand, stroking his hair with her thumb. “I felt it behind my eyelids.”
“No way,” he replies, believing her to be exaggerating.
“Yes way,” she replies, wrapping her legs around his waist, holding him closer for just a moment, before relaxing.
“Am I ever going to get my robe back?” he asks, not feeling like arguing over it. Who is he to tell her how she ought to feel about her own orgasm? Now that he thinks about it, he should’ve just taken the compliment for what it was, instead of starting with her. He’ll do that next time.
“No,” she says in a soft voice.
“Okay,” he says, right into her collarbone, seeing no point in discussing anything further. It’d just ruin the moment.
**
“You know, I actually hate this arc,” Kurogane says, setting down Jujutsu Kaisen Volume Five. He’s sitting on the stool behind the shop counter, while Yuko is standing next to him. She doesn’t look away from Kimihiro, who is across the shop and trying to shoo Maru and Moro off a shelf so that he can dust. Megetsu is following him, whining for attention, and he’s getting flustered, grumbling to himself. Yuko seems to find it enthralling. Kurogane frowns at her, clears his throat. Only then does Yuko look over at him. Blinks and doesn’t even smile. “Why?”
“Cos it’s a Naruto rip-off,” he says, “granted, I think the fights are cooler.”
“If the fights are cooler, why is it boring?”
“Because I’ve seen it before!” Kurogane says, “and I’m tired of people trying to kill Yuji. Let him live!” Yuko snorts, shakes her head.
“You are such a fucking dork.” Kurogane rolls his eyes, crossing his arms, defensive despite privately agreeing with her.
“Well, at least I have a hobby.”
“Most people would find it embarrassing.”
“Most people wouldn’t care.”
“This is true,” Yuko grins, “too bad that you’ve got such a mean girlfriend.” She winks too, just to rub it in.
Being in love with Yuko isn’t so bad. In fact, it’s pretty great when she isn’t annoying him. And even when she’s teasing him, Kurogane still likes the attention. That said, every so often, she hits a nerve, which she usually punctuates by reminding him that they’re in a relationship.
“You still got the dork boyfriend,” he replies, “you have it way worse, so I don’t know why you’re smiling.”
“So, you admit that it’s embarrassing?”
“Why do you think that I keep it on a need-to-know basis?”
“Well, you are technically reading it out in the open,” she stands up straight, grinning like an asshole. Kurogane scowls at her.
He opens his mouth to speak when the door chime rings. Tomoyo walks in, Syaoran and Sakura right behind her. Kurogane feels embarrassed, flustered that Tomoyo walked in right when he was going to scold Yuko for being so mean and judgmental, even though he thinks that nerds are weird too. He doesn’t want to model toxic relationship patterns to Tomoyo, so even though Yuko would most certainly deserve it and probably wants his reaction, he can’t do it in front of Tomoyo’s innocent eyes.
He blinks, opening and closing his mouth. Yuko looks over at Tomoyo, realizing why Kurogane is suddenly so tongue tied. She smiles, but this time, it’s not mean. Yuko reaches out, ruffles his hair, and Kurogane’s sense returns to his body. Feels the deep lines forming across his forehead.
Yuko cups the back of his head, and suddenly, her face is right in his. He can smell her cinnamon toothpaste and count all her eyelashes. “You make it too easy,” she mutters, before leaning in to kiss him, which she usually never does in front of people they know.
They have about three seconds before their kissing becomes inappropriate. Time slows down. Kurogane cups Yuko’s cheek in his own hand. From across the shop, Tomoyo giggles. Kurogane can’t even be mad about it.