Chapter Text
Adam and Will hadn’t had much time together between Will having to travel more for work and Adam’s schedule not lining up with Will’s. Their days off were different, their sleep schedules were different, and worst of all, Will was different.
Adam noticed; he noticed a lot of things about his brother. Ever since he started working with the FBI, things had changed. Will was more irritable and their intimacy had really been effected. Any spare time Will did have was often spent with Dr. Lecter.
Adam couldn’t help the swell of worry, worry that maybe Will had abandoned their bond, that he’d found that comfort in Hannibal instead of him. It gnawed at him, keeping him awake at night. He tried to distract himself with his studies and work but every time Will came home tired and smelling of Hannibal, the fear rushed back in.
“Will?”
“Hmm?” Will barely looked up from whatever it was he was reading, seemed like a newspaper article about another murder.
“Are you ready to be done?” Adam started to ask, having to pause before continuing, not realizing the weight of discomfort that accompanied the question. “Done with our.. relationship?”
“What?” The offense in Will’s tone carried, feeling like a stab. “What the hell do you mean ‘am I done?’ No, Adam, I’m not done,” he snapped, his own rising concerns, guilt, and fear making him react harsher than he wanted.
Suddenly Adam felt like he’d misread things, maybe he’d misunderstood Will’s distance and seeming disinterest.
“I’m sorry, Will, I just—..” Adam deflated a bit, rubbing the palms of his hands against his thighs. “You’ve been spending a lot of time with Hannibal and when you are here, you don’t want to cuddle or kiss or..” he trailed off, looking over at Will, hoping for his brother to fill in the gaps.
Will didn’t answer at first and the silence brought more discomfort, giving Adam too much time to think of the worst.
“There’s nothing going on between Hannibal and I, he’s just.. a colleague,” Will assured, though he remained unconvinced himself.
“Come here,” Will added, patting his leg. Adam scooted over, taking a seat in his brother’s lap. Will was warm, as he often was, and Adam felt comforted by that. It reminded him of all the times they’d bundled together for warmth as kids when the power went out.
“How long have you felt like this,” Will asked, hands casually sliding up Adam’s inner thighs, face pressed into the nape of his neck. He was so soft and he always smelt clean, unlike Will, who was at least a little dirty at all times.
“Since.. since you met him—you’ve changed, Will.”
“I haven’t.”
He had. And he felt it too. Something in him was wrong. Broken.
Adam didn’t want to argue with Will, not when he was finally getting some attention.
“Okay,” he said, turning a little so he could look back at Will, who was worn with exhaustion. His stubble had grown longer, the bags beneath his eyes heavy.
“You look tired,” Adam whispered, gently taking Will’s face into his hands, smiling as he felt the familiar feeling of facial hair beneath his palms.
“I am,” Will answered, offering a weak smile that didn’t reach his eyes. He wanted to be better for Adam; he hated being the reason for any doubt or pain.
“Let’s go to bed then,” Adam encouraged, getting out of Will’s lap and pulling him up, leading him to bed whether he liked it or not.
When they got there, Will was the first to lay down, and Adam followed, climbing on top of him.
Adam wanted more, wanted to kiss Will, to feel him— but he could see the way Will was even struggling to stay awake, so he resisted.
“Goodnight, Will,” Adam whispered, resting his head on his brother’s chest, listening to the soft thrum of his heartbeat.
The weight of Adam’s body allowed Will to sleep more restfully than he had in weeks, and though the nightmares still came, when he woke to see Adam on him, there was relief. He’d been denying his brother when that’s the one person he needed most right now.