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Dear mom and dad,
I was a child when it began. I will never forget the summer before first grade. It started when you left me, Clark, Jared, and Joshin the "loving" care of our grandma, while you were in Dallas Texas. Our grandmother didn't have enough rooms for all of us, so instead, we slept on the small bed in the guest room. It started with a few touches to my thighs at night, I had naively thought that he was just asleep and hadn't meant to touch me. Unfortunately, I was wrong. It soon evolved as he grew greedy. He had started to take my underwear off at night. I was young and did not yet know that what he was doing was wrong. When I awoke in the mornings, my underwear would be across the floor. I was yelled at and punished for things that I did not do. Every attempt I made to explain and defend myself either fell on deaf ears or got me into more trouble. I was forced to curb walls while I pleaded and begged to know why I was being punished. I scrubbed until my hands were raw and nearly leading. Then at night, it would start all over again. One night he took my hand under the covers and forced me to jerk him off, he did not care when tried to yank my hand away. One day I heard her, my grandmother, whispering that I was such a "harlot". I didn't know what a harlot was, but with the way that she had said it, I knew that it was something bad. After that, I never told another person about what was happening. Even now, I can vividly remember everything that my brother did to me. I was so terrified of being told I was lying that I silently endeared what he did for years. Josh knew this and would do anything in his power to get me alone with him. Playing hide and seek? "Oh Rossie, come hide with me!" While I was forced in my own closet with him, I was forced to touch him while he touched me. Jared walked in on us that time. He saw Josh's hand up my skirt. Jared tried to stand up for me, but I stupidly protected Josh in fear of being punished yet again. As I grew up, I learned that what he was doing was wrong, but still, I was crushed by a paralyzing fear of being punished so I refused to tell anyone about what was going on. Eventually, Derick, my father, walked in on him and me. And yet again, I was punished. Derick beat my ass with a leather belt, the one with the titanium holes that made it hurt a whole lot more. I didn't understand why I was being punished, but at that point I kind of expected it.
----The sad soul, Rosalyn.