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“Gaiemmae Station. This is Gaiemmae Station.”
"This is our stop," Neku announced softly as he got out of the bullet train with Shiki. "We're almost there."
"Lead the way, Neku," Shiki nodded as she stayed close to his side like glue.
When they exited the station, the place was quiet compared to Shibuya. He grabbed his phone from his pocket and checked the map. "Not too far from here…” he mumbled.
He put his phone away and stared at the bouquet of white spider lilies and a plastic bag containing food he had prepared last night. He shouldn’t be this nervous. It was just a visit to see his best friend, who now rests at the Aoyama Cemetery, but… ever since his best friend died years ago, he never attended the funeral or even visited his friend’s grave.
Four years had passed, and it was time Neku finally visited his best friend. It was an overdue reunion for the two.
His blue eyes then gazed at Shiki, his dearest friend, and his beloved partner. When the young adult told her that he was gonna visit his friend’s grave, she wanted to accompany him, which made him happy. Now that he thought about it… she had never seen an image of his friend, had she? Maybe the next time the pair visited Neku’s parents, he’d need to look for the photo album that contained plenty of pictures of himself and his best friend. His parents often captured the best and silliest pictures, so he laughed to himself. He was pretty stoked to share the memories with his partner.
“You seem to remember a happy memory, Neku,” Shiki noted, bringing him back from a pleasant memory. “I saw the smile on your face, and I heard a chuckle outta you.”
“I was, thanks for noticing,” he teased. “Am I not allowed to be happy?”
His partner laughed, “Of course, you have every right to be happy, silly.”
The two arrived at the cemetery shortly. Now to find his friend’s grave, but at least the couple could take in the scenery while searching for it. They managed to find the grave of Hachiko and his owner and made a little prayer to them before resuming their search.
Neku stared at a young woman with long, light brown hair cleaning the grave. She looked familiar to him. Without hesitation, he approached her, with Shiki following behind him. Once he got closer to the woman, he noticed her light blue eyes, the same eyes his friend had. It had to be her. "Oneesan? Is that you?" he asked.
The woman stopped cleaning and gazed at him. She was flabbergasted. "Neku?" Then there was a massive smile on her face. "Oh my god, it is you!" She placed the cloth back in the bucket, immediately approached the young adult with open arms, and embraced him. "It has been so long since I last saw you, Neku. I'm glad you're okay."
"It’s nice to see you again, too, Oneesan," he answered as he returned the hug. "I'm sorry that I didn't attend the funeral."
"Don't be," she reassured as she broke the embrace. "I'm sure my little brother wouldn't be offended." Shiki then caught the woman's attention. "Oh my, I didn't know you brought your girlfriend with you."
Both Neku's and Shiki's faces turn pink. How did she know?
That aside, Shiki introduced herself, "My name's Shiki Misaki. It's a pleasure to meet you."
"Oh! You're one of the founders of Gatto Nero, correct?" the young woman asked. "I heard of your brand through magazines. Even some of my peers in college were talking about it."
"Mmhm! That's right."
"You are definitely Neku’s type."
"Oneesan!" Neku choked. "Where did that come from!?"
The brunette laughed, "I'm sorry. It's been so long since I've teased you. Please forgive me."
She wasn’t wrong, though. "No worries," he replied dismissively while playing with his bangs.
Neku looked from the corner of his eye and witnessed his girlfriend with very flushed cheeks from the sudden comment.
"That aside," the woman changed the atmosphere around them, "thank you for visiting my little brother. I'm sure he'll be happy to see you. I see you have offerings for him. He'll love them since you got him his favorite flowers."
"I even made his favorite food."
"Oh my, you can cook too? Goodness looks like Misaki-chan is super lucky to date Neku."
"Ahaha… I… I guess I am," Shiki blushed, a hint of happiness in her tone. "He's my inspiration and support, and I wouldn't have made it this far without him." Neku felt his cheeks burn from a heartwarming statement.
"Aww, that's so sweet," the woman smiled. "Alright, no more teasing this time, I promise. We need to put your offerings to his grave. Just need to finish cleaning first."
Once the grave was clean, Neku placed his offerings on his friend's grave, and then the trio made their prayers. Neku heard sniffling, knowing it was his friend’s oldest sister. From what his friend told him years ago, she was the only one who cared for him since his parents abandoned him in favor of the youngest sibling. It must be challenging, but she did a great job raising him. As the sniffling ceased, the ambiance filled the air. "I better get going," the sister announced weakly. "I have research papers to write."
"Alright," Neku nodded. "It’s nice to meet you again, Oneesan."
"Likewise." Then a thought popped into her head. "Oh, Neku. Wanna exchange contact ID? I'd love to hang out with you whenever I'm free."
"Of course." The two grabbed their phones and exchanged their numbers and IDs.
"Awesome! Alright, now I'm gonna go and leave you lovebirds alone. Ciao!" The young woman bowed and walked away.
It was him and Shiki staring at his friend’s grave. "Oneesan really loved her little brother," Shiki spoke, breaking the silence. "I still wish I could meet him. If only I had met you sooner…"
"It’s okay, Shiki," Neku consoled. "I still wish he was here too, but… as harsh as it is, what's done is done, so there’s no point in changing the past. Just keep moving forward and live a good life. That's what my best friend would say if he was here."
She shook her head and replied, "I don't think it's harsh, Neku, but the advice was pretty good." The ambiance was welcomed again for a while. “Say, Neku, are you comfortable telling me about your best friend?” He watched her fiddling with her fingers. “You’ve never told me about your late best friend before, let alone our friends.”
She wasn’t wrong—Joshua was an exception, but the Composer never brought him up during his time in the Reaper’s Game (out of courtesy, maybe?). Neku never mentioned him until a few days ago when he checked the calendar and said his best friend’s death anniversary aloud. The brunette didn’t ask until now. Maybe she was waiting for the right time to ask, which was very considerate of her. “I don’t mind, but it will be a long story.”
“I don’t mind at all,” she grinned.
Neku began to tell his story. They met when they were both in their first year of middle school. They were classmates, and his friend was the one to approach him and ask if Neku wanted to grab lunch together. “Up until the start of middle school,” Neku recalled as his eyes gazed at the grave, “I couldn’t connect with anyone other than my parents and babysitter. I was fine with it because I was happy with the small circle I had.”
“And that changed, huh?”
“Yeah. It also made middle school a little bearable. I often looked forward to coming home, but after meeting him, I was looking forward to coming to school.” Neku recalled his friend often waited for him by the school gate so they could enter together. They had plenty of things to talk about, mainly art. The young adult remembered that his friend introduced him to CAT one day. “He showed me CAT… Mr. H’s works. He said he wanted to be a street artist like him and would love to meet the owner at least once.” A thought came into his head, and he said aloud, “I wonder if he did meet Mr. H at one point but didn’t realize it.”
“I’d like to think that your friend did,” his partner nodded. “Maybe he met him in the Reaper’s Game like we did, and he had a gut feeling that Mr. H was definitely CAT.”
“He’s a smart kid, so it’s a possibility.” The thought of his best friend in the Reaper’s Game made him frown. Had his friend lost the game? Or… maybe this was before the Game even existed. If he ever asked Joshua, the gracious Composer would definitely give him a proper answer. So, it was up for speculation.
He was interrupted when Shiki spoke, “Neku? Are you… okay?”
“Yeah, I am,” he reassured. “When you brought up the Reaper’s Game, I thought about my friend’s fate. I’m not upset at you for bringing it up if that’s on your mind. If I was, I’d say it.”
Shiki was relieved by his answer. “Alright, but I still want to make sure. Still… don’t end up getting yourself hurt.”
She was right about that, so he let go of the speculation buzzing in his head and resumed talking about his best friend. From where he left off, Neku was inspired to become an artist thanks to his friend. Being raised with creative parents, a mother who wrote songs and designed graphics and a father who taught music in high school, it seemed natural to pursue art. “During lunch, we were doodling on our sketchbooks,” he recited, “he mentioned that CAT was creating a mural at Udagawa. He has monitored the progression for months and said it was finally complete. Then he had an idea to meet and look at it together.
“When I saw the mural for the first time, it was absolutely breathtaking. The colors, the strokes, the shapes, the symbols, the technique, the hidden message… I wanted to analyze every bit of detail from the mural, so we hung out at Udagawa after school. Then…”
Then, he was quiet as the traumatic memory resurfaced. He never saw what had happened, but he knew it was his fault.
I shouldn’t have asked him.
I lead him to his death.
You would’ve been alive right now
and pursued your goal.
I took everything from you!
I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,
I’m sorry, I’m sorry,
I’m sorry, I’m sorry,
I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry…
He felt Shiki holding his hand, and she squeezed tight, letting him know she was there. His distressed blue eyes stared at her gentle brown eyes, and the guilt within his heart had ceased. This caused him to stop and actually think about it. Was it really his fault that led his friend to his demise? He pushed that question aside for now and focused on his partner. “Thank you, Shiki,” he smiled weakly. “You saved me just in time… like you always do.”
“Anything for you, Neku,” she smiled warmly. Neku was always fond of her smiles as they shone bright like the sun. “You don’t have to finish your story. I have a feeling about how it turned out. Whatever drove you to think that way, Neku, it wasn’t your fault.”
It wasn’t my fault. The words have rung in his head. That’s right. It wasn’t himself who killed his best friend—it was the accident. Looking further back to the painful memory, his friend’s oldest sister told him the news of the accident. When she mentioned that he was caught in it, it broke the boy as if a part of himself had shattered. And then… he closed the door to the world, never letting anyone or anything in.
It was the first time he had experienced losing someone dear to him. He made a vow to never connect with anyone to feel the loss of losing another person close to him. However, that changed. He opened up, made friends, rekindled with his parents, and was even in a relationship for crying out loud! That part of him that was impossible to repair became possible thanks to the Reaper’s Game. Of course, that was short-lived when he was sent to Shinjuku, but that wasn’t the time to think about that.
“Neku?” His partner’s voice snapped him out of his thoughts again.
“I’m here, don’t worry,” he comforted her.
“You know I worry about you,” she reminded him. “Still, I’m glad. Thank you for sharing your story about your friend." Then she gave her partner a hug. “It must be hard, but I’m proud of you.” She didn't have to, but he let it slide and returned the hug.
"Well, thank you for listening," he retorted. Neku broke the embrace and turned his face away from the grave. "We should get going." He held her hand and squeezed it gently.
As the two walked away from the grave, a teenage boy with snow-white hair appeared beside the friend’s grave. The boy smiled and said with a weak laugh, "Took you long enough to visit me, Neku. But it was worth the wait. Maybe I can finally visit you."
Shiki stopped and turned her head, looking back at the grave. "Shiki? Is something wrong?" Neku asked.
"I thought I felt someone behind us just now," she replied as she felt a slight chill down her spine.
Neku turned his head and saw nobody. If he had to guess, it was most likely a spirit roaming around. "Did you feel any hostility?"
The brunette shook her head, "Not at all. I was just surprised. You think it was your friend, Neku?"
"It might be."
"Do you want to say something to him?"
If it really was his friend, Neku would tell his friend what had happened over the past four years. "I can save that for tomorrow," he answered.
"Do you want me to come with you again?"
"You have work tomorrow."
"I can visit after work, you know."
"You sure?"
"Positive!"
"Alright, we can come together tomorrow afternoon." Once Shiki’s mind was set, she wouldn't back out.
With a plan for tomorrow, the pair left the cemetery and returned home to Shibuya.
