Chapter Text
Chapter 6: Taste my disaster it's heavy on my tongue (Mind over matter, Young the Giant)
“kurdeleli kiz, kurdeleli kiz…” the boy calls out loudly as they run around in the school playground.
“Just you wait, I will show you, bilezikli çocuk!” the girl snaps back as she tries to catch up to the curly-haired boy. He had been the bane of his existence and she wished so much that he would leave the school.
“You can’t catch upto me no matter how hard you try!” He teases her as his longer legs gave him the extra help he needed to win the race he had with his girl.
But the girl is no easy feat to defeat. She never gets tired even when he needs to catch a breath. Every day, they repeat this game of being only obsessed with catching the other. It ends every time with both in the dirt, their clothes covered in mud. They both receive a big talking to when they go home but neither calls cease-fire. There is something to this that their little minds cannot comprehend. But the competition drives them to be alert.
“One last time, kurdeleli kiz!” the boy says.
“Why? Are you scared of losing again to me?” the girl smirks and replies.
The boy doesn’t say anything. They play their routine game of catching the other and it seems like the boy is not trying as hard as he should to win the game.
“Ahh I knew it. Bilezikli çocuk has lost his touch.”
The boy just smiles at her teasing for the first time and the girl feels a flutter inside her chest. The boy looks like he has something to add but before he can say anything else, the bell rings and they are called inside.
The next day, the boy doesn’t show and the girl frowns to herself. It takes another day for her to get over her pride and ask the teacher what happened to him, only to find out that she will never see the boy again.
She refuses to talk to the other students in the class because none of them could take her teasing or compete with her like him. Instead, she focuses on school work and saves her fun time to fight with her abla, who doesn’t like being the focus of her little sister’s pranks and fights.
The phone rings loudly, waking Ceylin from a dream she can’t remember. There is a phrase in her mouth that she is just about to grasp but she loses it as soon as she sees the caller ID and finds it is her mother.
“Anne, günaydın. Noluyo? Is everything ok?” She rapidly fires enough questions to distract her mother from doing the same to her.
“What happened?” Gul says in a voice that sounds more like a shriek than a conversational tone. “What happened is that your father is in Haiti and they just told him that they are kicking him out and this will be his last tour! So no more money, Ceylin! What will happen to our family? How will I feed everybody?” Her speech gets more aggressive as if that wasn’t enough. “That no-good, son-of-a-b*tch man!”
“But mom –” Ceylin tries to interrupt to get a word in but fails.
“Oh why did I marry him? He is never here. Money is never here. Now he is coming back, jobless again!”
“Anne, stop! We don’t rely on baba’s salary anyway. I will find a solution and take care of all the bills.” Ceylin laments though Gul doesn’t notice her daughter’s defeated voice.
“Ceylin, why are you so sleepy at this hour? How are you going to pay the bills if you sleep all morning and don’t work? What do you want me to do? Should I, at my age and with my health, take a job and start working? This is what you want, don’t you? I should work and one day I will fall and never get up. This is what will make you happy.”
Gul rants for another ten minutes and while Ceylin listens, she also checks out a little. Realizing the time her mother referred to, she finds that it is only 8 in the morning and despite her mother’s panic, she is not as late as she thought. Her head is pounding no thanks to the alcohol she consumed as well as her mother’s early morning wake-up call.
“Anne, we will figure it out. Now, I have to go and get ready for work. Hadi, I kiss you!” She quickly cancels the call before she spends an accidental hour trying to pacify her mom.
Knowing that Aylin would be visiting, she doesn’t begrudge her sister the work of dealing with her mother, especially in this frantic state. Sometimes she doesn’t know if she is lucky to have escaped the madness or feels guilty for abandoning the emotional health of her family to her older sister. But it doesn’t matter. Ceylin never allows herself too much time to think about it because the harder she thinks, the worse she feels.
As she gets up to move, Ceylin finally notices the coat that covered her upper body like an embrace. It looks suspiciously like Ilgaz’s coat and she finally recalls the events of last night. Her cheeks burn when she remembers the Neva conversation and how close they sat. Had it been a more traditional workplace, her actions could be interpreted as her making advances on a junior and she could be sued for how she acted.
Over and over, she keeps messing everything up. She folds the coat carefully and places it back on the couch. Making up her mind, she decides to apologize to Ilgaz when he appears. It seems like the morning is cursed for her too.
***
S: Where is the money? Where are the drugs? The client and the boss are very unhappy, oğlum.
C: Sorry, I have been hiding from the family. Things got a little complicated.
S: Save the apology. Just get the job done! Or they will come to find you and your family. You know what happens after that.
Cinar had not been sleeping through the nights ever since he got those threatening texts from Serdar. Though they had arrived before he had thrown the drugs in a fit of anger, they had slowly begun to haunt him as they kept piling up. He had hidden his fear to the best of his ability from his family and luckily being the universally despised and no-good brother meant that nobody paid too much attention to him.
Having dressed up in a hurry as he didn’t want to arouse any more suspicions or make his brother angry, Cinar made his way to the living room. He found Defne taking her breakfast and Metin filling another plate for him. But he decided not to eat it and just wait for his abi instead.
It was only moments later when Ilgaz abi appeared all dressed in his customary turtleneck and pants. It felt strange to see him without the full suit they had grown used to seeing him in. He wasn’t sure what was going on but he knew now was not the time to ask questions.
“Cinar, are you ready to fulfill your promise?” Ilgaz took a glance at him and asked him seriously.
Everybody was curious but it was Defne who asked the pertinent question, “nasil olacak abi?”
“Well, Cinar abi has decided to start work until he is ready to resume school. Today will be his first day of work. Why don’t we all wish him good luck?”
Defne looked at the tense atmosphere in the room. Her baba was looking at Ilgaz abi, then Cinar abi. Ilgaz abi gave a firm gaze to both her baba and Cinar abi.
“Good luck, Cinar abi.” And then she gets up and hugs her brother. “Kolay gelsin and make sure to save your first salary for me because I want another teddy bear.”
Laughing at her words, Cinar hugged her back.
“Hadi Cinar, we don’t want you to be late for your first day. Baba will take you to work and explain everything. Now I don’t want to be late to take Defne to school either. Hadi Defnecim, are you almost finished?”
Defne takes a glance at her plate and quickly finishes the last bite of her sandwich. They collect her things while Metin is cleaning up. It is then they hear a knock on the door and Ilgaz goes to open it.
***
Ceylin’s face immediately flushes as she takes one look at Ilgaz. Her mind immediately flashes back to the intimacy of the night before and watching him now in that turtleneck and the gelled hair is doing things to her.
Calm down, Ceylin, it’s only a man. She repeats to herself over and over again.
“Ah avukat hanim, come in, we are almost ready. Give me a minute and let’s get Defnecim to school,” Ilgaz says and hurriedly makes his way inside and quickly tells his goodbyes.
Ceylin notices that the room is tense despite appearing deceptively normal. Metin refuses to look at anybody or greet her. Cinar has a grimace on his face as if he is being prepared for the gallows. Defne has a tiny smile but worry hidden in her eyes. She is not sure what she stepped into. But the urgency of the day settles in the front of her mind. So she doesn’t bother to address any of it though she thinks she might ask Ilgaz if everything was ok later in the day in privacy.
Defne, noticing her, quickly jumps to give her a hug. “Günaydın, Ceylin abla. It is so good to see you. See I made my own hair today. What do you think?”
Ceylin laughs a little at the haphazardly done hair. “Günaydın, kuzum. Your hair looks beautiful. Do you mind if I adjust it a little?”
To this, Defne nods and turns to allow her full access to her hair. With nimble fingers, Ceylin proceeds to insert the strands that hadn’t been perfectly placed. Looking at her bag, she also finds a few pins to settle the errant pieces that refused to fall correctly.
As she is doing it, she feels Ilgaz’s gaze on her. It hits her like electricity and she tries to keep her breath steady.
“Are we ready to go?” she asks him without catching his gaze. She is not sure if she can today, so she decides to stare at his chin when she needs to address him. It is close enough to his eyes that there is no doubt that she is talking to him but far away enough that she won’t get lost in them.
“Evet, let’s go abla.” Defne’s words break Ceylin out of her thoughts as she takes her hand, turns, and proceeds to walk outside the door. She doesn’t have to wait for Ilgaz as she can hear his footsteps following her.
They really do need to talk but this is neither the time nor the place, Ceylin decides. So they all settle into Ilgaz’s car and Ceylin helps Defne with the seatbelt before taking her own seat in the front.
The ride is mostly silent and even Defne, who is usually full of life and chattery is quiet and thoughtful. When they reach the school, Defne gets out and immediately looks around trying to find Sultan and her mother to introduce them to Ceylin as she asked.
Luckily, they don’t have to wait too long as Defne finds the two of them walking to the school’s entry door from the other direction a few minutes after they all got there.
“Sultan, Sultan, over here!” Defne’s loud shout pulls Ceylin’s attention from her phone to the little girl Ceylin had met previously. She observes that the newly arrived girl flushes at the attention and her mother has a sad look on her face.
Putting on her professional mask and with one look to Ilgaz who had been unusually lost in his thoughts since the morning, Ceylin meets the girl’s mother with a small smile on her face.
“Gunaydin! I am Defne’s friend, Ceylin. We met your daughter yesterday when we picked up Defne from school. They are such good friends and we should ensure that they can spend some time together. This is Ilgaz,” she motions to him and indicates for him to greet the mother and he waves and says hi, “he is Defne’s brother. We were hoping you would allow us to visit you guys today evening after school.”
The lady looks overwhelmed with Ceylin’s talk but she kindly thanks her for the offer. “Oh yes, of course. Sultan always talks about Defne at home. I am really grateful for your sister,” she tells Ilgaz, “and you both are most welcome at our home today. Here’s the address. Also, I am Leyla. Leyla Sadik.”
With a satisfied grin on her face, Ceylin drops off Defne and both she and Ilgaz kiss her goodbye.
When they get into the car, Ilgaz has a strange expression on his face. Ceylin takes that as her cue to re-establish their boundaries and address the lingering tension.
“Tamam, let’s talk about it.”
He immediately stiffens up and stares in her direction as if confused by her words. “What are you talking about, Ceylin?”
“I want to know what is making you appear so tense today. If it’s about last night and you feel uncomfortable in my presence, I am very sorry. It won’t happen again. I had too much to drink and I shouldn’t have been inappropriate. It’s not an excuse, just the best I have.”
Now he looks even more puzzled at her words and a weird frown appears on his face. “What gave you the impression that I had issues with how you behaved?” He doesn’t address the rest of her words.
“Because you have been so quiet all morning. If I haven’t done anything wrong, what’s the problem?” Ceylin cannot stop the muted hysteria in her voice from coming out.
Ilgaz shakes his head at her and his frown turns into a fond smile. “It doesn’t have anything to do with you, avukat hanim. I was just thinking about Cinar.”
She deflates at that. “What happened to him? Is everything ok?” Her franticness turns to concern as she looks at him sympathetically.
Without taking a beat, Ilgaz answers. “If you show so much concern for my family, I will have to marry you, avukat hanim.”
They both stare at each other wide-eyed at Ilgaz’s statement. He is as shaken by his words as she is but decides to rectify the situation the minute he gains control of himself. “Joke, it’s a joke. Sorry. Cinar just decided to drop out of university and I arranged a job for him at the station. Today is his first day and I guess I was just worried about how it would go. It feels strange letting him go without being there for him.”
Ceylin lets the matter drop before addressing the Cinar situation. “You should be proud of yourself, Ilgaz. You helped your brother out by not pushing him but trusting that he knew his mind about university. Not many brothers with such background could do that.” She gives him an encouraging smile and squeezes his hand for comfort.
“Now are we going to get going or spend all day outside Defne’s school, Ilgaz bey?”
Her light-hearted teasing makes him smile too and he finally starts the car and they head out.
“So we need to get to our office and research a bit about Leyla hanim, who is just about to be our first client.”
Ilgaz glances at her before turning his attention back to the road. “Our client?”
“Evet, from what I heard from Defne, Sultan and her mother could really use our help. And this way we get our business rolling.”
Ilgaz is about to comment on what she said but his attention is diverted as a car appears to be driving on the wrong side of the road. He quickly changes lanes to avoid it but the car behind him is not so lucky and gets hit. Smoke comes out of the vehicles and there is a mini-fire in one of the cars.
He jerks the car to a stop and Ceylin, unprepared for the sudden brake, almost hits the dashboard.
“Ilgaz, what happened?” That’s when she looks around for the first time and realizes that she had spent the whole trip in the car staring at him instead of the road.
It is not that unusual because she likes to look at people when she’s talking to them and see their reactions to what she is saying. But with Ilgaz, it is different. She had tried to not look at him all morning because of her embarrassment over last night. So inadvertently, she ended up making up for the lost time in the car.
Now she realizes that there has been a car accident that they narrowly escaped due to his skills and she suddenly feels dizzy with gratitude that it is him who was driving today.
“Iyi misin?” Ilgaz asks as he checks her up and once he realizes nothing has happened to hurt her, they both get out of the car and make their way to help the injured people.
***
The phone rings just as Derya is about to get out of her apartment and head to work. When she sees it’s Pars on call, she quickly throws the sandwich in her hand on the kitchen counter and cleans up her face before taking it.
“Derya savcım, this is Pars Seçkin. We met for the hospital case yesterday? I got a call from there this morning that we can meet the doctor now for the next few hours. I was thinking if you could send me your address, I will pick you up and get there. I am so sorry to bother you but they said this would be the only time today which works. I hate mornings and morning meetings are the absolute worst. Neyse – ”
At his long ramble, Derya starts smiling and cannot help but shake her head before interrupting him. “May I speak, Pars savcım?”
This time his reply is a quick and crisp “evet” and she can tell that he’s embarrassed.
“My address is Mehmet Tosun Apt 71! The streets are really small, so beware the traffic could be difficult to navigate. I am ready so you can just come. See you soon, savcım!”
And then she hangs up without giving him an opportunity to mortify himself any further.
It only takes him a couple of minutes to arrive and they sit and ride together to the hospital. The silence in the car is not tense but a little uncharacteristic of their individual personalities.
Having enough of the quiet, Pars turns to Derya and starts. “After our talk, I realized I never said günaydın to you. So günaydın, Derya savcım.”
Derya smiles in return. “Günaydın, savcım.”
“So I studied the case for the hospital. It seems like the doctor, Esra hanim, was performing a cardiovascular surgery and she seemed to have fainted mysteriously in the middle. Unluckily, the other people in the room were all her interns who neither had the knowledge nor skill to complete it without her supervision. They tried to substitute her with other doctors but nobody had her expertise. Another doctor, Kazim bey, who was a brain surgeon, ended up showing up and performing the necessary stitches to close the cuts made on the patient but while he was closing them, something happened and the patient died. You can tell that this case is going to be complicated. The patient was a 17-year-old high school girl, Yeşil. Her parents are in shock and grieving and are rightfully angry at the hospital as well as the doctors. None of this was supposed to happen. It was supposed to be an easy surgery.”
Derya nods while Pars is talking. The seriousness and complicated yet heart-wrenching nature of the case left a big impression on her when she first read it. She had collected a list of questions. But she had a fair idea that this case had nothing to do with the patients and something fishy happened at the hospital.
“Evet, savcım. As you know I read the case too. It ended up being significant because this attorney, Yekta Tilmen fights for the hospital’s side and wants the case dismissed based on the lack of evidence of wrongdoing by the hospital. He insists that it is all just an accident and that no malpractice has occurred. It has also been claimed that the parents did not reveal some medical condition which caused the issues leading to the patient’s death.”
It definitely made her a little wary when she read about Yekta’s claims and she was prepared to assess the case extremely closely.
They reach the hospital soon after. Pars gets out of the car and runs to her side. She is confused when he reaches for the car door but then chooses to let it go, mumbling to himself. Grinning she gets out of the car and they both walk to the doctor’s office in matching steps.
***
The two men are in gurneys as they get out of the ambulance and are brought inside the operating room. Being the only true witnesses of the accident, Ilgaz and Ceylin await the doctors and the police officers. Hoping to deal the case with Eren, Ilgaz quickly texts his best friend the details of the case. This helps hurry up the arrival of the police and by the time the doctor gets out of the surgery room, Eren is already there yelling “kardeşim”.
“Eren, I am so glad you are here. Iyi ki varsin, kardeşim.”
Ceylin notices the police officer who hugs Ilgaz with a shrewd look. The plot thickens for her as she realizes that her assistant, Ilgaz Kaya, also seems to have connections in the police force. Then it clicks that Metin Kaya is a police officer. Maybe it’s not that strange after all. But she chooses to take this as a chance to tease her associate.
“My my, Ilgaz bey! You seem to know half of Istanbul. I wonder if it is me who has worked here for 5 years or you?”
Hearing her ribbing, Ilgaz is about to reply but the doctor turns to speak to all of them first.
“Are you family of any of the victims?” He points to Ilgaz and Ceylin and then motions to the surgery room.
“Maalesef doktor bey, hayir! But we saw the accident,” Ceylin replies.
“Well do either of you have AB- blood? It seems like one of the men lost a lot and we don’t have enough supply of this group as the last bottle was just used up by a pregnant woman who had an accident.”
Ilgaz looks at the doctor and nods. “Evet doktor bey! My blood group is also AB-.” He then volunteers himself to donate the blood. Ceylin smiles at him with encouragement and turns to go with him. But he stops her.
“Ceylin, you stay here with Eren and tell him the account of what happened. I will be gone just for a minute.”
She hesitates but then agrees. But before he goes, she gives his hand another quick squeeze.
“Tamam, Eren bey! Let’s have it. What do you have for me?”
Eren laughs at the quick-witted woman and notices all the glances and touches as well as the soft expression on his friend’s face. He already can tell that there would be no more women for his best friend in the future and that he should get to know this Ceylin because she was something special.
“Ok tell me everything about the accident!”
Ceylin quickly narrates the story of what happened and how the blue Mitsubishi pickup truck drove on the wrong side of the road and came crashing into their lane, how they narrowly escaped but the grey Hyundai Elantra behind them was not so lucky. Once the details are done, she begs Eren for a favor.
“Eren, look I am a direct person and I am not sure what Ilgaz told you about me…”
“Nothing, he said nothing. Actually, we haven’t spoken in the last few days because we have been very busy.”
Ceylin’s glare makes Eren stop.
“Neyse, I am a lawyer and Ilgaz works with me. Look, we are going through a rough time at my firm and there is a dearth of cases. So it would be really helpful if you could tell the guy to hire me as their personal injury lawyer. After all, you would love to help your best friend, right?”
Eren finds himself confused about the situation and Ilgaz’s new work partner and job designation. But he is a man who knows when to ask the questions and when not to. And so, he responds smoothly. “Of course, kraliçe! Consider it done. Anything for Ilgaz!”
Ceylin smirks at his new denomination for her. “Kraliçe?”
“Don’t you think it fits?”
She laughs at that and Ilgaz arrives just in time to catch her and Eren chatting casually. “What is this laughter I hear?”
“Nothing, Ilgaz! Just sharing some childhood stories with Ceylin like that time – ”
“Tamam, tamam. That’s enough. We have work to do and a home to get to. We should leave you to your work.”
Eren smirks but doesn’t say anything. “See you later, abi! Kraliçe!”
Ceylin nods her head at him and does the hand motion of a phone and mouths “call me”. They had exchanged numbers in Ilgaz’s absence and she was waiting to receive the follow-through call about being assigned to the case officially.
“I see you made friends with Eren quite quickly,” Ilgaz says as he opens the car door.
“He is a very funny guy and easy to talk to. I can see why you like him.”
Ilgaz smiles affectionately at that as they drive away.
***
Pars watches as Derya interviews the doctor. They find out that she suffered from a stroke and had been in a coma when they were supposed to get his testimony. Even still, there were high chances that she might slip into one again which is why they had to make this early morning meeting in the ICU.
“So tell me, Esra hanim! What happened during the surgery? Were you ill before? Was there a likelihood that you could get a stroke?”
“Savcım, I was completely fine that day. I have never been in ill health before. As you can see, I am quite young. And don’t tell the other doctors but I looked at my chart and this has been due to some issues related to my new birth control medicine. Something about them affected me as they had a low dosage of estrogen.”
Pars and Derya nod and take notes based on what the doctor is telling them. Usually, there would be a police officer with them as they take testimony but Metin amir was attached to the case and he was interrogating the other doctor, Kazim bey, right now after having finished his procedure with Esra hanim.
After the questions are all answered, they make their way out of the room.
The ICU had been a little stifling and Pars takes out his handkerchief that he carries in his coat pocket to wipe his face and defers to his companion. “So what do you think, Derya savcım? Do you also want to talk to Metin amir and Kazim bey now or should we just read their testimony at adliye?”
Derya notices the edge in his voice and makes up her mind. “Let’s go to adliye first, savcım. I think we need to reorient ourselves in the case and prepare a list of possible investigation routes as well as gather all testimonies to read before we summon Yekta bey and the hospital for questioning. This will take time.”
“Very well said, savcım! Let’s go,” Pars says with a sigh of relief and hurriedly makes his way out of the hospital not realizing that he has taken Derya’s left hand in his as he rushes to the car.
A little surprised by his forwardness, Derya has little time to process what happened before he begins his rambling once more. “I personally feel that there is something fishy going on with the hospital. Wrong birth control medicine? A suspicious doctor replacement? The patient dying mysteriously? And all they can do is reverse Uno the blame on others? What can a person do these days? Cannot trust anybody. No doctor, no hospital. We need to look at this case very carefully, savcım.”
Nodding her head at his words, Derya agrees with his analysis. “Evet, savcım. Don’t worry! If you ever need anything, my sister is a doctor and I trust her with my life. I will recommend you to her and personally ensure that you never have to face any serious problems. Even Neva has gone to her clinic several times to get checked.”
Pars smiles at her words and thanks her with a grateful look. “Oh I didn’t know. Well, thank you savcım for helping the Seçkin siblings. We are both in your debt.”
They reach the court in the meantime and this time, Pars has made up his mind and rushes to Derya’s side and opens the door for her. In step with each other, they both head to Derya’s office where Pars drops her and they decide on a meeting time in the evening to discuss the developments of their independent investigation whilst they deal with their other cases.
***
Once more at home, Ilgaz and Ceylin separate. Ceylin goes upstairs to her apartment and changes. As soon as she is done, Eren texts her with a thumbs up and she happily makes a plan for how she will approach the accident case. For now though, she runs to get to Ilgaz as they are running just a little late to pick up Defne and go to Sultan’s house.
When she exits the apartment, she finds Ilgaz at her door just ready to knock. “Are we ready, patron hanim?”
“Evet, evet. We need to run so that we make it on time to the school. I will drive,” she bosses him and he nods without arguing as they make their way to the car once more.
It doesn’t take very long to reach to the school, what with Ceylin’s manic driving which made Ilgaz hold tightly to the dashboard. “Ceylin, I want to make it to my sister’s school in one piece. We are not so late as to demand such an effort.”
“I know what I am doing, Ilgaz. We need to always arrive before time rather than late to never make the küçük hanim wait.”
Ilgaz shakes his head as the car finally stops just outside the school. Ceylin is right. They are still late but not by much.
He makes his way to the school as she parks and looks around to find Defne. But he can’t see her anywhere. His face frowns immediately and he goes inside to check the waiting room. All students are gone except one. And it is not Defne. A teacher passes by and he asks her about Defne.
Ceylin reaches inside the moment the teacher says that Defne had already left but could not provide another answer to who she left with except that he was an old man with white hair.
Ilgaz’s face goes white at her words. Ceylin takes his hand in hers and squeezes it before proceeding with her questions. “Ilgaz, what happened? Who did Defne leave with?”
He takes a deep breath and looks at her with agony in his eyes before finally responding sharply. “Merdan Kaya!”