Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

ACT SEVEN

past

“Wonbin, this is Jung Sungchan. Remember to show him respect and use appropriate honourifics,” Clan Leader Park says to his son, gently nudging the taller boy in pink robes forwards. Sungchan stares at him, toying with the sash of his own white and gold robes shyly. “He recently lost his mother, so be kind.”

Young Master Park furrows his eyebrows and looks up at his father. “Lost his mother? Why, where did she go?”

Clan Leader Park hesitates. “She…left, and she is not coming back.” He says carefully. The concept of death is foreign to most children, but Sungchan is all too familiar with it at this point in his life. He feels like telling the other boy that she killed herself, but perhaps that was too morbid. He is only ten, and Yunho-hyung mentioned the Park boy is younger than him.

“Nice to meet you, Young Master Park,” Sungchan greets quietly, bowing at a ninety-degree angle, just like his brother showed him. He stands up straight, fingers finding their way back to his sash to toy with it.

“…yeah, you too, Young Master Jung,” Young Master Park mumbles, bowing as well. He looks up at his father. “Where did Chaeyoung-noona go? And where is Chanyeol-hyung?”

“Chanyeol will be joining us later; he will be taking over the clan soon, so he had to remain behind at Rose Valley to handle some…problems.” Clan Leader Park responds softly. “And Chaeyoung is with Master Jung.”

Sungchan watches their exchange, a little envious of their bond. He does not remember his father at all. The closest thing he has to a father is Yunho; but he is not his father, he is his brother. Yunho rarely sees Sungchan as he has been busy with looking after their clan, so if Sungchan was being honest, they’re not very close.

“Oh, okay,” Young Master Park says.

“I want you to spend some time with Young Master Jung,” Clan Leader Park says gently, “he needs a friend his age.”

Sungchan almost scoffs. He has a friend his age; Jaemin. Sure, he’s three years older, and he’s been unwell recently, but they’re close. Much closer than he is to his own two brothers. He still rarely sees Jaehyun at the best of times. The only time Jaehyun ever lets him see him is if he’s with Jaemin.

Sometimes Sungchan feels like his brothers don’t love him.

Young Master Park looks down at Sungchan. Considering Sungchan isn’t exactly small (he’s rather tall for his age), he’s surprised Young Master Park is taller than him. Not by too much, but enough to look down on him.

“Doesn’t he have his own brothers he can spend time with?” He asks with a scrunch of his eyebrows and curl of his lip.

Sungchan glares at him.

“Clan Leader Jung doesn’t have time for children,” Clan Leader Park says sternly, “and Master Jung…well, he’s the same age as your sister. He has his own things to deal with.”

Young Master Park crosses his arms. “Chaeyoung-noona always spends time with me, though. And Chanyeol-hyung, too.”

Clan Leader Park sighs. “Chanyeol will not be able to spend time with you as often once he takes over as clan master.” He says, then gently nudges Young Master Park forwards again. “Just humour me, Wonbin-ah.” Then, Clan Leader Park takes his leave, leaving Young Master Park and Sungchan staring awkwardly at one another.

“So…” Sungchan says stiffly.

Young Master Park looks at him, crossing his arms. “No offence, but I really don’t wish to spend time with you.” He says in a snarky tone.

Sungchan feels a vein twitch in his forehead in irritation. “How can I not take offence to that?”

“Well, if your own brothers don’t wish to be around you, then why would I?” Young Master Park says, examining his nails.

Sungchan chews his lip. He…has a point. Sungchan’s own two brothers rarely show him the time of day, so why would Young Master Park? Especially after his father instructed him to.

“…Yunho-hyung is clan master, so he’s busy,” Sungchan says meekly, “and Jaehyun-hyung…”

Young Master Park’s eyebrows pinch. “Wasn’t he, like, stabbed by someone?”

Sungchan averts his gaze. He doesn’t know what happened to Jaehyun for him to shut everyone out. He doesn’t know why or how Jaehyun acquired that injury on his abdomen. Nobody tells him anything.

“I guess,” Sungchan shrugs.

“So you don’t even know why your own brother is so sad?” Young Master Park barks a laugh. “Oh, that’s just depressing.” He clutches at his stomach from laughing so hard, and the more he laughs, the worse Sungchan feels. “My sister told me Master Jung was betrayed by someone he trusted, clearly he tells her more than he tells you.”

Sungchan clenches his hands into fists. “W-well…they are going to be married someday, right? So isn’t it natural for them to share things with each other?” He argues.

“Well, yes,” Young Master Park says, “but he doesn’t tell you anything, and that’s what’s so funny about this.” He chuckles again. “Wow, I cannot believe my father wanted me to befriend you. You’re pathetic.”

Sungchan feels tears prick behind his eyelids. He inhales deeply, his breath shaky. “Whatever you say.” He mumbles sourly, trying to keep his voice steady.

That night at dinner, Sungchan sits in between Jaehyun and Jaemin, opposite Master Park (who had arrived that evening), Young Lady Park and Young Master Park. The two clan leaders sat at either head of the table, and conversation is minimal. Young Lady Park is directly opposite Jaehyun, and of course Young Master Park is opposite Sungchan.

Jaemin uses his chopsticks to pick up Sungchan’s beans he picked out of his meal, placing them on his own plate to eat.

“Sungie, you shouldn’t be so picky,” Jaemin teases, pinching Sungchan’s chubby right cheek.

Sungchan whines, playfully batting Jaemin’s hand away. “But I don’t like beans.” He pouts.

He hears Jaehyun chuckle beside him, before picking up a piece of duck on his own plate and placing it onto Sungchan’s. “Here, I know you like duck, so eat up.” He says with a dimpled smile, and Sungchan beams.

“Thanks, Hyung.” Sungchan chirps, pleased.

“Aw, you’re all so cute,” Young Lady Park coos from across the table. Sungchan can see Jaehyun’s ears redden at the compliment, and he shyly clears his throat and averts his gaze. “Here, Sungchannie, I don’t like duck.” She picks up a piece of duck with her chopsticks and reaches across the table, placing it onto Sungchan’s plate

“Oh—thank you, Young Lady Park,” Sungchan beams, bowing his head in thanks.

“That’s not fair,” Master Park whines. “You never share food with me or Binnie.”

“Of course I don’t, you both always just take my food. Especially you.” Young Lady Park shoots her older brother sitting to her left a glare.

Master Park shrugs, popping a bean into his mouth. “What? Not my fault you don’t eat fast enough. Speaking of which…” He leans over and uses his chopsticks to pick up a piece of duck from Young Lady Park’s plate and eating it quickly. She dramatically gasps, whacking him on the arm.

“You’re so cruel,” she whines. “You’re lucky I don’t like duck.”

Sungchan giggles watching their exchange. He looks to Young Master Park who is sitting silently beside them, barely sparing them a glance. Sungchan’s smile falls, poking at the food on his plate.

He shouldn’t be feeling bad that Young Master Park is looking left out, after all, he insulted Sungchan (numerous times) earlier today. But, the solemn and sad look strewn into Young Master Park’s cute features just made Sungchan feel bad for him. Perhaps he was not as close to his siblings as he made it out to be? Or perhaps he’s jealous at how close Sungchan seems to Jaehyun and Jaemin, despite their age differences? Young Lady Park is the same age as Jaehyun, and he’s eight years older than Sungchan, so that means Young Lady Park is nine years older than Young Master Park. And, she’s a girl. She probably wouldn’t want to spend as much time with her much younger brother.

Sungchan, against his better judgement, picks up his piece of duck that Young Lady Park had just given to him and reaches across the table, gently placing it onto Young Master Park’s plate. He quickly looks up at Sungchan with wide eyes, surprised.

Sungchan realises that now all eyes at the table are on him.

“Um…I don’t know if you like duck or not but…here…” Sungchan says quietly, now embarrassed. Young Master Park looks down at the duck, eyebrows pinching.

“Thanks, I guess,” he mutters.

Dinner continues uneventfully after that.

It’s late at night, and Sungchan sits outside on the steps of the main hall, gazing at the stars. He couldn’t sleep; he kept thinking about Young Master Park and the lonesome look on his face at dinner. Maybe him being nice to Young Master Park instead of being mean might have changed his opinion of him? He has no doubt in his mind that Young Master Park’s siblings love him, but perhaps they are not as close as Young Master Park wants them to be. Perhaps his aggravation towards Sungchan was just simply him projecting his insecurities onto Sungchan.

Sungchan understands, however. He knows his brothers love him, but that does not stop the anxieties and insecurities from clouding his judgement. Sometimes he feels like they don’t love him. And sometimes, their actions are the reason why he feels that way. But then, after he starts thinking like that, his brothers will do something that will make him feel guilty for ever thinking they didn’t love him.

“Young Master Jung,” comes a voice from behind him, one Sungchan recognises instantly as Young Master Park.

His voice snaps Sungchan from his thoughts, and he turns around on the steps to face the other boy standing behind him. He’s in his night robes, staring down at Sungchan with an unreadable gaze.

“Young Master Park,” Sungchan greets with a small smile.

Young Master Park does not return his smile, instead, he scowls. “What was that, earlier?”

Sungchan is confused. “What was what?” He stands to his feet, now fully facing the taller boy.

“Giving me your food at the table,” Young Master Park says quietly, his hands at his sides balling into fists. “I don’t need your pity.”

Sungchan furrows his brows, feeling irritation creeping into his skin. “Pity? I wasn’t pitying you.”

“Yes, you were,” Young Master Park snarls.

Sungchan inhales deeply. “I’m sorry you feel that way,” he pauses, “it’s not my fault you’re envious of me.”

“Envious? Ha! Why would I be envious of someone like you?” Young Master Park growls.

“Someone…like me?” Sungchan asks quietly, his voice cracking.

“You’re pathetic. What you saw at dinner was not a glimpse into my life, I am close with my siblings. Especially my brother,” Young Master Park says, “do your brothers practice shooting with you? Help you train with a jian? Do they take you to the village and go to the markets? Do they tell you stories? Read with you? Do they do anything with you? Because my siblings do.”

Sungchan feels like he’s been punched in the gut, the air winded from his lungs.

Young Master Park is right. He trains either by himself, with Taekwoon or with Jaemin watching. He practices shooting alone most of the time, too. He goes to the markets in the village with Jaemin and Soojung, never Yunho or Jaehyun. He can’t remember the last time either of them read to him, or told him stories, or sang to him. He has vague memories of someone singing softly to him when he was younger, but he doesn’t remember their face; it’s definitely not Yunho or Jaehyun. The last time he did anything with Jaehyun was last year when he and Jaemin slept in Jaehyun’s bed during a bad thunderstorm. Other than that, they only really spent fleeting moments together.

“Clearly your brothers don’t care about you. And if they don’t care, why should I?” Young Master Park continues. “There must be something wrong with you if your own brothers pawn you off onto the servants and Young Master Na.”

Sungchan blinks back tears, hanging his head. He chews his lower lip, trying to cease the wobbling. He doesn’t want to cry in front of Young Master Park. But his words sting. They hurt.

“…you’re right.” Sungchan murmurs, his voice brittle.

“I know I am.” Young Master Park replies, turning away from a silently sobbing Sungchan and disappearing inside the main building.

present

When Sungchan awakens, he’s acutely aware of strong arms securely wrapped around him, warmth that is not his own radiating from a body lying behind him. He blinks a few times, drowsy. His eyes sting and his head hurts.

He turns his head back slightly, finding his back is pressed to Jaehyun’s front, the older male’s arms tight around his waist. He never left. He stayed, just like he said he would.

Sungchan once again faces forwards, snuggling back into his brother’s warmth. He hasn’t lied like this with Jaehyun in years—not that he has to, Sungchan isn’t some meek little child anymore, he shouldn’t need someone to cuddle him in his sleep to soothe his raging anxiety. Sure, Jaehyun would occasionally hold Sungchan (and Jaemin), like this when he was younger, but it was rare. He now knows why Jaehyun was so cut-off from him, why he was so reserved, why he chose to suffer alone; and it makes Sungchan feel so very guilty for being so selfish as a child.

Jaehyun was struggling with a betrayal of someone he cherished, a betrayal that left him physically and mentally damaged. The betrayal cost him his father, his ability to use magic, and caused a permanent disability and scar upon his body. Sungchan now thinks that perhaps the murder of his father at the hands of Clan Leader Lee is the reason why his mother ended her own life. Well, partially.

Speaking of his mother’s suicide, Young Master Park’s words from yesterday come crawling back into his mind. He remembers the previous Clan Leader Park telling nine-year-old Young Master Park that Sungchan’s mother left and wasn’t coming back, but that was simply just a way to tell a child that she died. Clearly, Young Master Park continued to believe that small white lie he was told so many years ago.

That doesn’t change what Young Master Park said, and what he said to Sungchan back then, either. Deep down, Sungchan always believed Young Master Park was right. That he was a burden to his brothers, to the clan. Young Master Park would come around often with his sister and brother to visit Jaehyun mostly (as Young Lady Park and Jaehyun are betrothed after all), and Sungchan made sure to avoid him at all costs. He never told anyone what Young Master Park had said to him, he never wanted him to get in trouble despite how awful his words were to him.

Sungchan has seen how Young Master Park interacts with other people; he’s respectful, polite, and even kind. One time when they went to visit the Park Clan, Sungchan watched Young Master Park interact with the other students of the clan who were the same age as him or younger, and the difference was like night and day between how Young Master Park treated them versus how he treated him.

He doesn’t know why Young Master Park hates him so much. To his knowledge, he’s done nothing to warrant this treatment from him. Perhaps Young Master Park was envious of him, and he let that envy fester into hatred over the years. He doesn’t know why Young Master Park would be envious of him, though.

Sungchan feels shuffling behind him, followed by a soft groan. “…Sungie…?” Comes Jaehyun’s deep, groggy voice in his ear. His hold on Sungchan tightens slightly, and Sungchan exhales slowly.

“Morning, Hyung,” Sungchan murmurs softly, twisting slightly in Jaehyun’s arms so he could face his barely-awake brother.

Jaehyun visibly relaxes as his gaze focuses upon Sungchan’s face, and his arms loosen their grip. “How did you sleep?” He asks softly, reaching up to cup Sungchan’s cheek, using his thumb to gently stroke the tender skin under his left eye.

“I slept okay,” Sungchan says earnestly.

“That’s good,” Jaehyun mumbles. “Sungie…about yesterday…”

Sungchan averts his gaze. “Hyung—”

“That wasn’t the first time Park Wonbin has said something like that to you, right?” Jaehyun asks lowly.

Sungchan stills, eyes blowing wide. He doesn’t answer, and he hears Jaehyun sigh heavily.

“What else has he said to you?”

Sungchan remains silent.

“Jung Sungchan.” Jaehyun’s voice is hard.

“He…when we first met…he said I was pathetic,” Sungchan manages to choke out, his voice tight. “He said…he said…clearly you and Yunho-hyung don’t love me because you never spent time with me…that clearly there must be something wrong with me, and because my brothers don’t care about me, why should he?”

At each word that tumbles from Sungchan’s lips, Jaehyun’s face grows darker, clearly angry. Sungchan looks away, swallowing thickly.

“Why did you not tell me? Tell anyone?” Jaehyun questions, his voice low. “We tried to push for you to be friends—why did you not say he was treating you so awfully?”

Sungchan exhales a shaky breath. “I…I didn’t want him to get in trouble.” He says in a small voice.

Jaehyun frowns. “You’re far too kind, Sungie.” He sighs softly. “All this time, Park Wonbin has been nice and respectful to me, but cruel to you.”

“He respects you,” Sungchan murmurs, “and Yunho-hyung, too. And Nana. Me, on the other hand…” He blinks back tears. “I don’t know why he hates me. I don’t like it when people dislike me, Hyung.” His voice breaks.

“Oh, Sungie,” Jaehyun whispers, using the pad of his thumb to wipe away a stray tear that slipped from Sungchan’s eye. He didn’t even realise he was crying. “Unfortunately, in life, there are going to be people who don’t like us. Hate us, even. We could be the most perfect human yet they would still hate us. The only thing you can do is remain kind and show that their hatred does not affect you.” He says gently.

Sungchan nods slowly, sniffling. “You…you do love me, right? You and Yunho-hyung?” He looks up at Jaehyun with wide, glassy eyes.

“Of course we love you. Of course I love you.” Jaehyun exclaims, as if he couldn’t believe Sungchan could even be asking this. “You mean the world to me. I’m sorry I pushed you away so much when you were only a child, if I could go back and change things, I would. I’m sorry, Sungchan.” He apologises again. “I love you very much.”

Sungchan bursts into tears, and Jaehyun immediately tugs him into a tight embrace once again. Sungchan sobs into his chest, clinging onto him tightly.

“I’m sorry for being selfish. I’m sorry I thought you didn’t love me. I’m sorry.” Sungchan cries, and Jaehyun’s hold around his trembling body tightens.

“No, Sungie, don’t apologise for anything.” Jaehyun whispers into his ear, soothingly petting the back of his head. “You’ve done nothing wrong. Ever. You’re perfect, you’re the perfect brother.”

Sungchan’s chest doesn’t feel as tight anymore after crying in his brother’s arms.

“Donghyuck, do you have something to tell me?” Taeyong asks, standing in front of the door to the room that his students resided in, preventing them from leaving. Yongbok and Minhyung exchange a look.

Said tanned male blinks up at Taeyong in confusion, eyebrows furrowing. “Um…I don’t think so?” His eyes then widen. “I’m not in trouble for something, am I, Clan Master?”

Taeyong sighs, folding his arms across his chest. Jeno stands beside him, obviously confused by Taeyong’s question and behaviour.

“Not yet, you’re not.” Taeyong mumbles, stepping inside the room and gesturing for Jeno to follow. He does, and Taeyong slides the door shut behind him.

After speaking briefly with Jaehyun last night, Taeyong decided to interrogate Donghyuck in the morning regarding what Jaehyun had spoken about involving Sungchan. Taeyong cannot shake their interaction out of his mind; they were so very close, and for the first time since returning, there was no hatred or animosity in Jaehyun’s eyes or words.

Sungchan obviously spoke to Jaehyun about their meeting in the hot springs. Why wouldn’t he? That boy’s words still sit heavy in Taeyong’s heart; about him not being a bad person, namely. Sungchan is very much like his brother in that sense, being able to penetrate Taeyong’s vast defences with relative ease.

He is also naive, innocent. Taeyong knows Jaehyun wants to protect that, as does Jaemin and Yunho. They want to shield little Sungchan from the horrors of the world; which is what Taeyong wanted to do for Jaehyun, but ultimately was the cause of his horrors. If Taeyong cannot protect Jaehyun, he must at least try to protect Sungchan.

“A little birdie told me that you may have been involved with an altercation regarding Young Master Jung yesterday?” Taeyong questions, voice low.

Donghyuck nervously laughs. “Well, yes and no. It wasn’t my fault.”

Taeyong quirks an eyebrow. “What do you mean by that, exactly, Lee Donghyuck?”

“Uh…” He looks away, scratching the back of his neck. “Young Master Seo wanted a volunteer to demonstrate a defensive manoeuvre, and nobody wanted to do it, then someone behind me pushed me so I would step forwards.” He scowls, crossing his arms. “Young Master Park was the one who pushed me, so I yelled at him. He retaliated, then Young Master Jung decided to butt his nose in and get involved.” He explains. “He did not have anything to do with the initial altercation, but he decided to get involved anyway.”

“What happened next?” Taeyong presses.

Jeno, who stands beside him, shoots him a look.

“Well, they argued back and forth for a bit, Young Master Jung insulting Young Master Park and vice versa,” Donghyuck continues, “Young Master Seo was trying to get Young Master Jung to stop, but they both kept going. I told Young Master Jung I didn’t need help from a Jung, and that’s when Young Master Jung called Young Master Park a mule,” he pauses to snicker, “and then…” He trails off.

Taeyong’s eyebrows furrow. “And then?”

Donghyuck sighs. “I may not be a huge fan of the Jung Clan, or Young Master Jung, but what Young Master Park said about his mother was…not nice.”

Taeyong feels dread consume his veins. “What did he say about his mother?” He asks in a low tone.

“Why do you care?” Jeno asks suddenly, annoyed.

Taeyong shoots him a dark look. “I care about Sungchan.” He snaps. He looks back at Donghyuck. “What did he say, Donghyuck?”

Donghyuck hesitates. “That Young Master Jung was the reason his mother left. Then, he started crying and ran off.”

Taeyong’s eyes blow wide. “He said what?”

Donghyuck looks away. “I mean, it was harsh, but, respectfully, Clan Master, why do you care? Why are you so shocked about what was said about his mother?”

“She did leave, didn’t she?” Yongbok asks, chiming in.

Taeyong inhales deeply through his nose, leaning back against the wall with his arms folded across his chest. “No. She killed herself.”

The room falls deathly silent, all the students’ eyes widening and mouths falling agape.

Jeno looks down, scoffing softly. “And? Jung Junho murdered our parents. An eye for an eye.” He says, his tone dangerous.

Taeyong looks at him, eyes narrowed into a dark glare. “Lee Jeno. I am well aware of what Jung Junho did. Ji Hyeji, his wife, the mother of Clan Leader Jung, Jaehyun and Sungchan, was a lovely woman.” He turns to face his students. “You are all aware I spent eight years living here in the Jung recesses, right?” He eyes Jeno. “Before I learnt the truth of where I actually came from, I lived here as one of them—as one of the Jungs. I trained alongside Clan Leader Jung as a younger brother. I took care of Jaehyun as an older brother. I helped take care of Sungchan as an older brother when his mother, who was sick often, couldn’t.” He pauses, his scowl deepening. “Jung Junho deserved to die. But the aftermath? Clan Leader Lee, Jaehyun, and Sungchan, did not deserve that. And I still care deeply for them. That is something I cannot control or change.” He inhales deeply, attempting to calm his raging nerves.

“…then why did you stab Master Jung?” Jeno asks in a quiet voice. “You told me he got in your way. You told me you hated the Jung Clan and wished for their downfall. Which is it?”

Taeyong exhales shakily through his nose. “There is a reason why I stabbed Jaehyun.” He says quietly. “And it’s Jung Junho’s fault.”

Sungchan didn’t end up attending the training for the jian today. He feels far too drained and exhausted to even bother lifting a jian, let alone training with one and interacting with other people. And, if he was honest, he did not want to see Young Master Park again.

Jaehyun regrettably had to leave him, so now Sungchan was alone once again in his bedroom, just curled up in his bed under the covers. He stares blankly at the wall of his room, his head the only part of his body peeking out from beneath his blankets.

He isn’t sure what time of day it is; Yunho came to visit him at some point, but it was short-lived as Taekwoon needed Yunho for something related to the clan so he had to hastily leave (something about a fight?—Sungchan isn’t sure). Sungchan knows being clan master is more important than being his brother, but still, it does sting when he just wants Yunho to acknowledge him yet he does not have the time to.

Sungchan hears his door slide open, but he doesn’t make a move to look and see who has entered. The light streaming through the window is slowly dwindling, twilight nearing. He sighs, he really spent the entire day hiding in his bed like a child. He really is pathetic.

The bed dips behind him; whoever entered has sat on the creaky mattress.

“Sungie…”

It’s Jaemin.

Sungchan removes his blanket from around his head, rolling onto his back so he could look up at his adopted brother. Jaemin frowns, reaching out and gently petting Sungchan’s head. He brushes his shaggy fringe back from his large doe eyes, fingertips cold against Sungchan’s clammy skin.

“Have you been in here all day?” Jaemin asks softly, and Sungchan just nods in response. Jaemin sighs softly. “Baby…that’s not good. Have you had anything to eat?”

Sungchan shakes his head.

“Do you want me to get Chanwoo to bring you some food?”

Sungchan shakes his head yet again. “Not hungry.” He murmurs.

Jaemin exhales slowly. “You didn’t eat dinner last night either.”

“Not hungry.” He repeats quietly. He looks up at Jaemin with wide eyes. “Nana…?”

“Yes, Sungie?” Jaemin asks, tenderly petting Sungchan’s head.

“You love me…right?”

Jaemin stills, his icy blue eyes blowing wide. “What? What kind of question is that?”

Sungchan shrugs, averting his gaze. “I just…don’t feel very loved right now, Nana.” He mumbles, voice almost inaudible.

Jaemin seems to be at a loss for words. “Sungie…I love you so very much. And I’m not the only one.” He whispers, twisting so his legs sit straight on the bed, now able to face Sungchan better. He gently nudges Sungchan’s shoulders so he shuffles closer, lifting his head and placing it on his lap. Sungchan immediately relaxes against Jaemin, his warmth pleasant. “I can…understand your insecurities regarding why you may feel unloved. But I can say for certain you are very, very loved.” He says gently, leaning down so his lips are close to Sungchan’s ear. “By me, Jaehyun-hyung, Yunho-hyung, Chanwoo, the other servants, the other members of the clan, the new friends you’ve made from the other clans…” he lists off with a gentle smile.

Sungchan sighs quietly, burying his face into the silky blue fabric of Jaemin’s robes. “Sometimes it does not feel that way, Nana…”

Jaemin hums before responding, “Baby, you’re well-loved because you’re a naturally sweet and kind person. You do not have to try in order for people to like you.” He says with a gentle smile. “I’ve seen you talking with Young Master…Hwang, was it? You two seem close, now.”

Sungchan smiles slightly. “Yeah. He’s nice.”

“And he’s pretty.” Jaemin says, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

Sungchan barks a laugh, sitting up. “I mean…he is really pretty.” His cheeks are pink. Young Master Hwang is really pretty, and Sungchan cannot deny that perhaps he is a little attracted to him, despite him being another male.

“You know who else is quite pretty?” Jaemin asks with a cheeky grin.

Sungchan looks at him with raised eyebrows. “Who?”

Jaemin places his fingertips under Sungchan’s chin, smirking. “You.” He says, winking.

Sungchan laughs, cheeks flushing red. “No, no way.”

“Oh shush, Sungie,” Jaemin says. “Anyone would be lucky to have you.”

“Same goes for you,” Sungchan fires back. “Speaking of which…have you interacted with Young Master Lee at all recently? He’s attractive.”

At the mention of the blonde-haired man in black and gold robes, Jaemin’s cheeks flush bright red, his ice blue eyes widen and his lips snap shut. Sungchan raises his eyebrows, confused by Jaemin’s reaction.

“What’s that reaction for? You two didn’t—oh my gods, did you two—?”

Jaemin interrupts Sungchan by slapping his hands over his mouth, silencing him. “Shh! Don’t you dare finish that sentence!”

Sungchan just stares at him with wide eyes, reaching up and gently grabbing Jaemin’s wrists and tugging his hands away from his mouth. “You did? Oh my gods, Jaemin! You did!”

Jaemin whines, flopping down onto Sungchan’s bed and burying his face into the pillow. “It was an accident!”

Sungchan is perplexed. “How can it be accidental?” He asks, astonished. “Did he just trip into your bed or something?”

“What? No!” Jaemin looks up at him in horror. “It didn’t even happen in my bed.” He adds with a pout.

“Then on your floor?”

“Jung Sungchan! No!” Jaemin exclaims, once again burying his face into Sungchan’s pillow and screaming into it.

Sungchan just gapes at him. “I cannot believe you didn’t tell me! When did this happen?”

Jaemin peers up at him. His entire face is as red as a cherry. “I was not going to tell you, or anyone for that matter.” He says sourly. “How on earth am I meant to start a conversation like that? Oh, ‘Young Master Lee and I may have almost had sex because I was caught up in ogling his bulging muscles and got an erection because of how attractive he is’?”

Sungchan blinks at him. “Well, that’s one way to put it, Nana.”

“Sungie. Please do not tell Jaehyun-hyung.” Jaemin begs, sitting up.

“I won’t tell anyone, why would I do that?” Sungchan says. “I’m just insulted you didn’t tell me.”

Jaemin rolls his eyes. “Would you tell me if you had sex with someone?”

Sungchan’s cheeks bloom in pink. “Uh…”

“Exactly.” Jaemin scrubs a hand through his black hair. “Look, it was an accident. It was a spur of the moment thing. We both were hormonal, we’re both attracted to each other, and well, one thing led to another and…” he sighs. “We didn’t go all the way.” He flushes and looks away. “For that matter, I didn’t even touch him.”

Sungchan blinks slowly. “Maybe I’m just an innocent child,” he says, and Jaemin rolls his eyes at him, “but how does…sex work between two men?”

Jaemin flushes dark red. “Oh—I am not telling you how that works. You know how it works between a man and woman, use your imagination.”

Sungchan purses his lips in thought. He knows how a man and woman procreate. But how does a man do it with another man? He furrows his eyebrows, his eyes then widening as it dawns on him.

“Wait—does that mean his penis goes in your—?”

“Jung Sungchan, please, just stop talking.” Jaemin interrupts, burying his face into his hands. “Oh, your precious innocence.” He whines. “Jaehyun-hyung is going to kill me.”

Sungchan quirks an eyebrow. “Why? Because you slept with Young Master Lee or because I now know how two men have sex?”

“…both, probably.” Jaemin groans. “Anyway. Change of subject.” He glances at Sungchan. “You need food,” he then inches closer and sniffs the air near Sungchan’s neck, “and a bath. You stink.”

Sungchan gasps, offended. “I do not!”

But, he lifts his arm and sniffs his armpit anyway. He does smell…just a little. Maybe a bath could do him some good, help relax him. Perhaps he might seek out the healing springs again, so that way he can be alone.

That sounds like a good idea.

Jaemin slides Sungchan’s door closed behind him after finally convincing him to go get something to eat, then go have a bath. Jaemin runs a hand through his mussed black hair, a heavy sigh escaping his lips.

He’s been so caught up with everything going on in his life that he neglected Sungchan, and he feels so insanely guilty for not realising he was struggling. Especially with what happened yesterday involving Young Master Park. Jaemin also feels guilty for not being there to protect Sungchan, and guilty for not noticing how Young Master Park treated Sungchan over the years. Jaehyun had told him earlier after he saw Sungchan, and Jaemin was shocked.

Young Master Park had always treated Jaemin nicely and respectfully. At first, he couldn’t believe he would be so cruel to Sungchan, but the more he thought about it, the more sense it made. It was no wonder Sungchan always avoided Young Master Park when he and his siblings would come to the Jung recesses, it all makes perfect sense now.

Jaemin heaves yet another heavy sigh as he walks down the halls towards the exit of the main building, bound for the healers room so he can take his medication. He reaches the healers room, then stops.

Standing at the entrance to the room with his hand unsurely on the handle of the canvas door with a bloodied mouth, is Lee Jeno.

Jaemin’s ice blue eyes widen as Jeno’s head raises and he looks straight at him. His own mahogany eyes blow wide as he stares at Jaemin. An awkward silence blankets them like a thick layer of snow, an uncomfortable atmosphere choking Jaemin. He can see a bruise swelling on Jeno’s cheek, as well as blood gathered in the corner of his mouth and dripping down his chin.

“What happened to you?” Jaemin asks, voice scratchy.

Jeno looks away, clearing his throat awkwardly. “Got into a fight.” He says quietly.

Jaemin sighs, approaching Jeno slowly. He reaches past the slightly taller male and slides open the door to the healers room, walking inside. Jeno remains standing in the same spot.

“You coming in?” Jaemin asks, not looking back at Jeno. He hears Jeno cough awkwardly, then soft footsteps as he enters. “Go sit on the cot.” Jaemin instructs, pointing to the cot that Sooyeon has set up for her patients when needing medical attention.

Jeno does as he’s told, and Jaemin can hear the cot creak as he sits down on it. Jaemin grabs his medicinal potion first, unsealing the wax lid and quickly drinking the bitter liquid.

His lungs fill with oxygen as he inhales deeply, the potion once again clearing his airways (for a short while, anyway) of crystals. Jaemin exhales shakily, placing the empty bottle on the counter in front of him. He then collects bandages and potion designed to disinfect wounds to treat Jeno’s wounds in his arms, turning and walking over to where Jeno sits on the cot.

“So. You got into a fight, huh?” Jaemin asks, sitting on the cot beside Jeno. He picks up a cotton cloth, then the potion. He tips the bottle of the potion onto the cloth, drenching it.

“Yes,” Jeno responds quietly.

“With whom?”

Jeno shrugs. “Just another student.” He says.

Jaemin frowns, reaching up and gently cradling Jeno’s jaw with his fingertips, carefully turning his face to face Jaemin. Jeno’s face contorts slightly in pain from the touch, and Jaemin frowns.

“Sorry,” he apologises, tenderly dabbing the wet cloth on the corner of Jeno’s mouth, cleaning the blood and sanitising the split in his lip.

Jeno’s eyebrows scrunch at the twinge of pain, but he remains still so Jaemin can tend to his wound.

They sit in tender, yet slightly awkward silence, as Jaemin cleans the blood from Jeno’s mouth. Jaemin focuses on Jeno’s mouth, on cleaning the wound. He pauses, recalling how those soft pink lips of his were all over his body, on his own lips; making him feel good.

Jaemin flushes, averting his eyes. He’s well aware of Jeno’s eyes trained on his face, and he attempts to ignore it. Jaemin removes his hand, the blood now gone.

Jeno huffs, reaching up and softly grasping Jaemin’s wrist in his large hand, his action causing Jaemin’s eyes to snap back to Jeno’s face, his cheeks blooming in red.

“Why are you helping me?” Jeno asks quietly, his fingers curling gently around the palm of Jaemin’s hand, bringing it closer to his face.

Jaemin blinks up at him, averting his eyes once again. “To tell you the truth, I’m not entirely sure.” He murmurs. He flinches when he feels Jeno’s free hand carefully cupping his jaw, tilting his head up to look Jeno in the eye.

“I am…sorry, about the other night,” Jeno apologises softly, “I was rash and acted on impulse. I’m sorry.” His voice is low, earnest.

Jaemin blinks up at him, his voice caught in his throat. “I…” he swallows.

“Just…wait,” Jeno says, “I also apologise for how I spoke about your family, about your brothers. Especially Young Master Jung.” He sighs. “That…was what the fight was about.” He admits quietly.

“…what?” Jaemin’s eyes widen like marbles, shocked by Jeno’s confession.

Jeno swallows, averting his eyes. “Donghyuck, one of my friends from my clan, was partially the reason for the altercation to start between Young Master Jung and Young Master Park. At the training session today, obviously Young Master Jung wasn’t there, and Young Master Park made a comment about it to another student. I then got involved and snapped at him for what he said to Donghyuck, then what he said to Young Master Jung. Then that’s when we fought.” He sighs, letting his hand that was on Jaemin’s jaw drop to his lap. “I punched him, he punched me…until Clan Leader Jung separated us.”

Jaemin bites his lip. “Why would you…?”

Jeno sighs. “Well, initially it was because of how he treated someone from my own clan…” he trails off. “I also…felt bad.” He toys with his fingers in his lap. “Perhaps I am not the…fondest, of your brothers or your clan. But I thought about what Young Master Park had said to Young Master Jung…and thought about what I had said to you about your clan, and your relationship with your brothers…and I thought about my own relationship with my brother…and I realised that your brother did not deserve what was said to him.”

Jaemin looks down at his lap. “Young Master Lee…I understand your aversion to the Jung Clan. Believe me on that.” He chews the inside of his cheek. “Jung Junho…he did many bad things. You and I are both victims of his.” He looks up at Jeno’s face. “But my brothers have nothing to do with Jung Junho and what he did. I have told you this, but you refused to listen to me.”

“You have to look at it from my perspective, Young Master Na,” Jeno says sourly, “Jung Junho murdered my parents when I was barely a year old, and took Taeyong-hyung from me. I knew I had a brother only because of the remaining servants of the clan who escaped Jung Junho’s wrath telling me I had a brother,” he pauses, licking his dry lips, “and the way Taeyong-hyung was treated here…I do not know the full extent, he refuses to tell me. My whole life I grew up hating the Jung Clan for what they did to my family—to my clan, despite us being part of this damned treaty. Even when my brother first returned to the Lee recesses, the hatred he held for the Jung Clan was…intense.”

“That’s to be expected,” Jaemin says quietly.

“It wasn’t just the Jung Clan he hated, though,” Jeno mumbles. “The Choi Clan, too. Specifically Clan Leader Choi. Again, I do not know the details, but I know enough to have a strong hatred of that man.” He sighs. “I still do not like the Jung Clan. It will…take time for me to come around to your brothers. But that doesn’t mean I am without sympathy. Especially once my brother told me what happened to their mother.” He looks like he wishes to say more, but he just falls silent, deciding not to continue.

Jaemin nods slowly. “I…don’t dislike you, Young Master Lee,” he murmurs, and Jeno’s head snaps up to look at him with wide eyes. “Because I understand you.” He looks at the bandages in his lap. “When I first came here…I didn’t want to be around the clan who…who massacred my clan. But Yunho-hyung was kind. He was loving. He made sure I had the best medicine and potions, the best healers; the best care. He was busy looking after a broken clan, but he did his best.” He smiles fondly. “I owe my life to Yunho-hyung.” He looks back up at Jeno. “Jaehyun-hyung and I were able to bond because of our trauma, because of what we went through. And I know he’d do anything for me. He’s protective, and loving. He made sure I was never suffering. And Sungie…” he trails off. “Ah…he’s like my baby. There’s only three years between us, and that’s why he and I bonded so well. He was lonely, so very lonely, he was suffering from the loss of his parents alone with no comfort from his brothers; they did not realise, and he did not tell them.” He pauses. “Maybe you don’t understand because you do not have a younger sibling but…I’d die for him, if I had to.” He says earnestly. “I want to protect him, just like Yunho-hyung and Jaehyun-hyung protected me.”

Jeno gazes at Jaemin with a soft gaze, just tentatively listening to him talk. Jaemin appreciates Jeno’s apology, and acknowledging his mistakes; but he also appreciates Jeno’s attention, and how he just listens to him.

“Knowing now how Young Master Park has been treating Sungie all these years…makes me so angry, Young Master Lee.” Jaemin snarls softly. “Jung Sungchan of all people—he wouldn’t even harm a fly. And do you know what?”

“What?” Jeno responds coolly.

“Sungie never told any of us because he didn’t want Young Master Park to get into trouble!” He scowls. “If that isn’t an attest to his character, then I don’t know what is.” He sighs, running a hand through his inky black hair. “Sorry. I did not mean to vent.” He bows his head in apology.

Jeno shrugs. “It’s fine, I don’t mind.” He replies, then winces. He reaches up and touches at the ugly purple bruise swelling on his cheek.

“Ah, here,” Jaemin says, gently tugging Jeno’s hand away from his face, then replacing his hand with his own. Jaemin chews his lower lip, concentrating on making ice form on his fingers and palm to help with the swelling of Jeno’s bruise.

Jeno’s mahogany eyes widen, but his face visibly relaxes as Jaemin’s ice-cold touch soothes the pain.

“The ice will help with the swelling,” Jaemin says gently.

Jeno chuckles softly, “Yeah, we don’t want this bruise to ruin this handsome face, right?” He grins, and Jaemin rolls his eyes in response.

“Yeah, whatever you say, Jeno,” Jaemin says, but then widens his eyes when he realises he dropped the honourifics. “Oh—I mean—sorry.” He bows his head, and Jeno snorts.

“You…you can call me Jeno,” Jeno says genuinely, “I…would actually prefer that.” He tilts his head, placing his hand over Jaemin’s on his cheek. “Can I call you Jaemin, then?”

Jaemin gazes up at him from under his long black eyelashes. “You may, when it is just us.”

Jeno smiles.

Jaemin thinks he looks cute when he smiles.

“Okay then, Jaemin.” Jeno says, tone teasing.

Jaemin rolls his eyes, playfully smacking Jeno on his arm with his free hand.

Sungchan has to admit, he does feel better after having something to eat (even if it was minimal—Chanwoo wouldn’t let him leave the dining area until he ate something), and he feels much better after a bath in the healing springs. This time it was empty, and he was alone for the entire time so he could really sit and soak. He almost fell back asleep, too.

He sighs, trudging slowly down the mossy steps hidden in amongst the foliage as he makes his way back to the courtyard. His day robes and drying cloth are draped over his arm, his white silk night robes adorning his body. The night is clear, the air cool against his flushed skin. He cannot stop thinking about yesterday, and most specifically, Young Master Park.

Sungchan is good at reading people and their emotions; and Young Master Park is no exception. Sungchan can easily tell he’s lonely, envious and bitter—but why? He isn’t sure. He’s given Young Master Park no valid reason to dislike him, or to feel envious of him. He’s never been mean to him—well, except for yesterday when he called him a mule and told him to eat rocks—but still, those petty and immature words do not compare to what Young Master Park said to him, and what he has said to him since they were children.

It’s all so very confusing and it hurts Sungchan’s head trying to figure out why Young Master Park hates him. He does not think he’s a bad person; after all, they’re both still young and they have a lot of growing up to do, but he seems misguided and perhaps unsure of how to handle his emotions, maybe? That sounds about right.

Sungchan can hear soft footsteps approaching up the nearly hidden path in front of him. Clearly, someone is seeking out the healing springs, too. He looks up from where his gaze had been lingering on the ground then freezes.

His eyes lock with Young Master Park’s own cedar brown eyes, an awkward and heavy silence falling between them. Sungchan’s breath catches in his throat. He did not think he’d see Young Master Park today, especially not now. Sungchan’s gaze strays from Young Master Park’s eyes to find an ugly purple bruise on his jaw, as well as a small cut on his cheek just below his left eye.

“…what happened? Did you get into a fight?” Sungchan asks, unable to help his concern for the boy before him.

Young Master Park’s eyes narrow and he scoffs, shifting his night robes hanging on his left arm to his right. “What does it matter to you?” He asks sourly.

Sungchan blinks slowly. “You’re right. It doesn’t matter to me.” He mutters, continuing to descend the mossy steps onto the dirt path, gently brushing past the shorter boy on his way past.

“Wait.”

Sungchan stops just a couple of paces behind where Young Master Park stands.

“Is it true?”

“What?” Sungchan asks, turning his head back slightly, but his body still facing away.

“…that you never told anyone how I treated you because you didn’t want me to get into trouble?” Young Master Park asks in a small voice.

Sungchan slowly turns around, finding the younger boy already directly facing him. His eyes are on Sungchan, his wavy chin-length black hair framing his face delicately. His plush lips are pressed into a firm line, jaw clenched.

Sungchan furrows his eyebrows, frowning. “How did you find that out?”

Young Master Park averts his gaze. “I overhead Young Master Na talking to someone in the healers room.” He then looks back at Sungchan. “Like I told you when we were children: I don’t need your pity.”

Sungchan sighs. “I wasn’t pitying you,” he mumbles, “why do you dislike me so much? You’ve hated me since the moment we met, and I just cannot fathom why.”

Young Master Park curls his lip. “I just do.”

“There has to be a reason!” Sungchan suddenly shouts.

Young Master Park’s eyes blow wide at the sudden outburst. Sungchan is surprised with himself—he’s never raised his voice to Young Master Park before. Or really anyone for that matter.

Young Master Park’s scowl quickly returns, masking his shock. “I just don’t understand how it’s so damn easy for you.” He mutters quietly.

Sungchan almost doesn’t hear him. “What?”

“You don’t even have to try for people to like you—to dote on you,” Young Master Park continues, glaring at the taller boy before him. “Everyone loves you, and you don’t even have to lift a finger. What’s so special about you, huh?” He steps closer to Sungchan, but his foot misses the step and he slips.

Sungchan quickly reacts, dashing forwards, arms outstretched (dropping his robes), and attempting to catch the smaller boy in his arms. The force of the fall knocks them both back and off the path, Sungchan landing hard on his back on the damp grass, Young Master Park lying on top of him, head on Sungchan’s chest.

They both just lay there in a breathless heap for a few moments, before Young Master Park pushes himself up onto all fours, hovering over Sungchan’s body.

“Ow,” Sungchan hisses, rubbing the back of his head, face contorting in pain.

“Why did you—?”

Sungchan stares up at Young Master Park’s confused face, his fox eyes wide, long black hair hanging down and framing his face. Sungchan blinks slowly, eyes wide. Young Master Park is quite pretty, if he really thinks about it.

“I didn’t want you to hurt yourself.” Sungchan whispers earnestly, ears burning.

Young Master Park’s famous scowl returns, and he quickly snatches Sungchan’s wrists in either hand, pinning his arms to the dewy grass beside Sungchan’s body.

Sungchan’s eyes widen comically. “What’re you—?”

“You know what else I hate about you?” Young Master Park interrupts, his grip on Sungchan’s wrists tightening.

Sungchan winces. “What?”

Young Master Park inches his face closer, his black hair delicately brushing against Sungchan’s cheek. “I hate your face. You’re just too damn pretty for your own good.”

Wait.

What?

Sungchan is confused. Very confused. “Wha—?”

Young Master Park doesn’t let Sungchan continue; cutting him off by capturing his mouth with his own plush lips. Sungchan’s eyes blow wide as Young Master Park kisses him, a strangled gasp escaping his throat as the dark-haired boy on top of him deepens the kiss, his soft tongue licking at Sungchan’s lips.

Sungchan doesn’t kiss back—one, he doesn’t know how, and two, he’s so very confused. He has never kissed anyone before, nor has he ever been kissed. Especially not like this. Why is Young Master Park kissing him? Doesn’t he hate him?

Young Master Park pulls back after what feels like a millennia; his breath laboured and gaze dusky. His cheeks are red, scowl long gone. Sungchan is out of breath, his cheeks burn bright red, lips swollen and slick with saliva. He watches as Young Master Park licks his own wet lips, before quickly scrambling off him. He collects his robes, brushes himself down, then quickly takes his leave without another word.

Sungchan just lays there, staring at the clear night sky with wide eyes and a thumping heart. His lips tingle from the kiss, and he reaches up and gingerly touches at his plump lower lip with his fingertips.

That was his first kiss. And it was taken by someone he thought hated him.

“What on earth just happened?” Sungchan voices his confusion in a strained voice.

Jaehyun gazes up at the clear night sky, hands tucked behind his head, the cool night air soothing against his skin. He lays on the roof above his bedroom, just thinking about everything that has transpired, and memories he buried deep within himself resurfacing within the last few days.

He thinks about Jaemin, Sungchan, his mother, his father, and of course, Lee Taeyong. Everything regarding that man with the soft blonde hair and pretty doe eyes is a mystery. A mystery he yearns to unravel. He mulls over his and Taeyong’s interaction from last night; he seemed so small, so broken—a stark contrast to how he had been when he first returned to the Jung recesses. Taeyong’s attitude has completely changed since the talk with Sungchan at the healing springs, and Jaehyun wonders exactly what his little brother had said to him for him to change like this.

Jaehyun knows for certain that something bad was happening to Taeyong whilst he resided here in the Jung Clan. His intuition tells him it has to do with Clan Leader Choi, but he has no evidence to back up his thoughts.

If he was honest, Jaehyun has never liked Clan Leader Choi. He’s never taken any issue with his children; Master Choi Minho, Young Lady Choi Sooyoung, Young Master Choi In and Young Master Choi Yeonjun, but it was just Clan Leader Choi himself he didn’t like. Since Clan Leader Choi and his father were so close, the Choi Clan were around often, or his father went to the Choi Clan instead. Jaehyun is younger than Young Master Choi In, but they never really spoke so Jaehyun wouldn’t say they’re friends.

Thinking back, it was mostly just Clan Leader Choi who came around, more times than not without his family or members from his clan. Jaehyun did always find it strange, since whenever the other clan masters would visit, they would come with their family and a few members of the second family or clan heads.

Jaehyun narrows his eyes as he stares at the sky. In actuality, Clan Leader Choi only brought his family to the Jung recesses on two occasions before his father’s death that he can recall. Every other time he was here, he was alone. After his father’s death was when he started to bring his family more often as his trips lessened.

Why would Clan Leader Choi continuously come to the Jung recesses alone so often? Sure, the Choi recesses isn’t that far of a journey (especially compared to clans like the Bae and Hwang Clans), but still, why was he constantly here?

Jaehyun wouldn’t call this ‘evidence’ for Clan Leader Choi’s involvement with whatever was happening to Taeyong, but it just makes his suspicions for the man rise. He did always find Clan Leader Choi…unnerving, to say the least. Jaehyun’s gut feelings have never been wrong before, but it is still a hefty accusation to throw around, especially at a clan leader.

He suddenly sits up, his hand quickly reaching for the handle of his jian that rested idly beside him on the roof. He grasps the handle, standing and turning, pointing the blade at whomever had snuck up on him. He exhales slowly and lowers the tip of the blade slightly, Lee Taeyong eyeing the weapon pointed at him with a slight smirk.

“A little jumpy, are we?” Taeyong muses, arms folded across his chest. He’s dressed in his black night robes, and Jaehyun has to tear his eyes away from the man’s prominent collarbones out on display in the v-neck shape of his robes.

Jaehyun’s mind wanders, and he has to force himself back to reality. His ears burn, and he’s certain they’re bright red right now, giving himself away.

Taeyong slowly approaches him, and Jaehyun lowers his jian as he gets closer. “Your ears are red. Were you having some indecent thoughts, hm, Jaehyunnie?” Taeyong asks slyly, standing before Jaehyun with a teasing smirk tugged into his plush pink lips.

Jaehyun scowls. “No. And even if I was, they weren’t about you.” He snaps. Jaehyun is a little annoyed with himself. He’s never had indecent thoughts about another man before, and for his mind to think about Lee Taeyong of all people in such a perverted way just makes his ears and cheeks burn hotter.

Taeyong steps closer, now standing less than a foot away, just like last night. “I mean, I don’t mind if you are having indecent thoughts about me.” He says with a Cheshire grin.

Jaehyun snorts. “What? So you don’t mind me thinking about pinning you against the wall and taking you from behind?” He says in a low, sultry voice, bending slightly so his face is in line with Taeyong’s. For a fleeting moment, Taeyong’s doe eyes widen and his cheeks dust in pink, but the reaction is only for a fraction of a second before that smirk is back on his lips.

“No, not at all,” he whispers, and Jaehyun notes his cheeks are still pink, “although, I’d prefer to be the one taking you from behind.”

Jaehyun eyes him, eyes flitting from Taeyong’s to momentarily gaze at his sinfully pretty lips. “I recall the other night you said you didn’t mind being beneath me,” Jaehyun drawls, “I won’t let you have me any other way.”

Taeyong’s eyebrows shoot up, that teasing grin never leaving his lips. “Oh? You’ll let me have you?”

Jaehyun then laughs humourlessly. “You wish.” He says, his eyes closely studying Taeyong’s abnormally surreal face. Jaehyun notes that he has a scar under his right eye in the shape of a rose. He stares at it; has he always had that scar?

“Hm, maybe I do,” Taeyong replies coolly.

Jaehyun’s gaze returns to Taeyong’s dark eyes. “Do you only wish to be on top because you want to be in control?” He asks, tone turning serious.

Taeyong falters. “What?” He chokes out, any hints of tease vanishing.

Jaehyun narrows his eyes. “You heard me.”

Taeyong huffs through his nose, averting his gaze. “Why do you ask that, Jaehyunnie?”

“Do you think I’m stupid?” Jaehyun questions, annoyed. “Do you think I wouldn’t figure it out?”

Taeyong stills. “Figure what out?”

“About what happened that night in your room.” Jaehyun snaps. “I heard you. I heard someone else in there. It wasn’t a one-time occurrence, was it?”

Taeyong frowns, his eyes narrowing. “And? What if there was someone in there? It does not concern you.”

Jaehyun mirrors Taeyong’s scowl. “No, it doesn’t,” he sneers, “why should I care about you?” He raises an eyebrow. “Quit it with this tough act. You’re not doing yourself, or anyone else for that matter, any favours.”

“Tough act? Like you can talk,” Taeyong snips back.

“You’re just doing the exact same thing I am,” Jaehyun retorts, “you’re masking your pain with anger and false bravado. All it does is push people away.”

“What do you know?” Taeyong growls, a dark glint in his eyes.

Jaehyun snorts, chuckling humourlessly. “What do I know…huh…I’m not sure,” he says in a snarky tone, “it’s not like someone I trusted and cherished deeply took my dagger, killed my father, then stabbed me and left me to die with the very same dagger, then returned after thirteen years and continued to torment me, all the while being cryptic and lying to me. No, that did not happen at all.” He glares. “I have suffered a lot because of you, because of your actions. It’s not even about my father anymore, but rather, how you turned on me. That night, you told me you’d always care for me. Then you stabbed me. Now, you still tell me you care but you have an extremely odd way of showing it.”

Taeyong averts his gaze, inhaling sharply. “I know you suffered. It wasn’t my intention. But if I had to do that night over again, I’d do it the same.”

“Including hurting me?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

Taeyong bites his lip.

“Why?” Jaehyun asks again, firmer this time.

“I just had to.” Taeyong replies. “You’re acting like I intended to kill you. That was not my intention.”

“Then what was?”

Taeyong scowls. “You don’t need to know that.”

Jaehyun feels like bashing his head against a wall. “Why are you so damn cryptic?”

Taeyong frowns. “I could say the same for you. You never told Jaemin or Sungchan about what I did, right? Yet you still sought comfort from them whilst leaving them in the dark for years.”

Jaehyun’s eyes narrow. “How do you know that?”

Taeyong’s lips snap shut, his eyes blowing wide.

Jaehyun runs a hand through his hair in aggravation. “Have you…been spying on me? For all these years?” He glares down at Taeyong. “Or, at least, getting someone to keep an eye on me?”

Taeyong remains mum.

“Lee Taeyong. Tell me the truth right now,” Jaehyun says threateningly, “have you been keeping an eye on me for the last thirteen years?”

Taeyong does not answer, he does not look at Jaehyun.

Jaehyun snarls, clenching his jaw so hard it hurts. He drops his jian, lunging forwards at Taeyong, startling the shorter male. He pushes Taeyong, his back hitting the tiled roof with a pained yelp escaping his lips. Jaehyun straddles Taeyong’s waist, hands gripping his wrists tightly, pinning him to the roof beneath him.

Taeyong’s eyes are wide, his breath escaping his lungs in short, sharp breaths. Jaehyun stares down at him, anger burning bright in his veins.

“Why are you obsessed with me?” Jaehyun asks lowly, his fingers tightening their hold on Taeyong’s wrists.

“How could I not be?” Taeyong responds quietly.

Jaehyun’s dusky eyes blow wide at his reply, his cheeks blooming in warmth like a red rose. “What?”

Taeyong exhales slowly through his nose. “I…” he looks away.

“If you’ve been watching me all this time, then you are aware I am betrothed right?” Jaehyun asks, eyebrows pinched.

“Yes. I am well aware.” He looks up at Jaehyun. “I am very well aware.” He says, quieter.

Jaehyun’s voice catches in his throat. His eyes wander from Taeyong’s pristine face, down his thin neck, to his chest where his robes have come askew. His skin is lightly tanned, his collarbones prominent and his chest enticing. His right nipple is out on display, a dark pink colour and hard from the cool night air. Jaehyun swallows thickly, his anger quickly dissipating and replacing with lust.

He forces his gaze back up to look at Taeyong’s face, the older man’s eyes wide and plump pink lips slightly parted.

Lee Taeyong truly is a beautiful man, and the attraction he is beginning to develop for him is undeniable. However, he is a man. The man that killed his father, severely hurt him, and ruined his clan, on top of that. And, Jaehyun is betrothed. He has a woman, a beautiful woman, he is to marry.

He would be lying if he said he had never had indecent thoughts about Chaeyoung in the past; they have not done anything inherently sexual just yet, but they have kissed a few times, and those times usually end up with him replaying the kiss over and over in his head. This is the first time he’s had the same, if not worse, thoughts about a man. And Lee Taeyong, of all people.

Does Taeyong think about him in the same way?

“What are you thinking about?” Taeyong questions softly, as though not to startle Jaehyun.

Jaehyun blinks back to reality, his grip on Taeyong’s wrists loosening slightly. He stares down at Taeyong who is looking up at him, expectant.

“You.” Jaehyun says earnestly.

Taeyong’s eyes widen yet again. “What?”

“I said, I was thinking about you.” Jaehyun repeats, letting go of Taeyong’s wrists and sitting up.

Taeyong remains lying down, staring up at the sky. He makes no attempt to move.

“Taeyong,” Jaehyun says, and Taeyong bolts upright at the lack of formalities. “If you cannot be honest with me, and remain cryptic, then just do us both a favour and stay away from me.”

“What?”

Jaehyun stands, crouching down to pick up his discarded jian. “You’re confusing, and exhausting. I don’t know what you want.” He turns away, walking past Taeyong who remains seated on the roof. “I want to care about you, despite everything you’ve done—but I just can’t when I don’t know anything about you anymore.” He stops, turning to look back at Taeyong who stares after him. “Make up your mind on what you want from me.”

Then, he walks away, carefully jumping down from the roof and landing silently on the ground below. Despite his calm demeanour, his heart is racing and his palms are sweaty.

He closes his eyes, inhaling deeply through his nose.

You have a betrothed. You have a betrothed. He repeats to himself, disappearing into his room, trying to think about the woman he is to marry, and not Lee Taeyong yet again.