Chapter Text
It was days later, with the trio watching Lady and the Tramp , with Merle’s brood below them that crossed yet another threshold. Wade had been suspiciously quiet during the movie, his eyes glancing over to Merle every few moments; the shapeshifter was on the edge of his seat, just as enthralled as his children were.
“What’s your favorite thing about this movie, Merle?” Peter asked quietly, meeting Wade’s gaze across those hunched, faintly muscled shoulders.
Merle didn’t look away from the T.V. as he hummed thoughtfully. “I like Tramp’s redemption arc.” That wasn’t all, though, “...The dinner scene is pretty nice, too. Authentic Italian music… just one big ol’ plate… It’s kinda like the ‘one bed’ trope but for food, isn’t it?” it was said in a half-mumble, not really expecting the two to hear the last part.
Unfortunately, he was with two superhumans.
A smirk made its way onto Wade’s face, a very devious plot forming in his mind. “That’s a good scene.” Wade agreed, “very romantic.”
“Definitely.” Peter leaned back on the couch, a smile on his own face. There was no possible way their next attempt at a date night could be misunderstood.
The museum trip had gone over great with the children, who enjoyed all the treats and toys that Wade had so kindly bought for them all, but it hadn’t quite set in for Merle that it was a date .
That left the two mutants no choice but to try, try again.
And they did.
Wade helped Merle straighten up his tie, much to the man’s disbelief, patting him on the cheek right after. “You’re ready for dinner, Six!”
They’d sent the kids off to the X-men mansion once more a week later, waiting for a bit warmer of a day to go out. All three of them piled into a cab, with Merle squeezed into the middle again.
He wasn’t really paying attention to where they were going–not until the cab pulled up to one of the most expensive Italian restaurants in the area, much too expensive for him or Peter to afford.
Peter hauled Merle out of the taxi, ignoring his protest’s. “C’mon! It’ll be fun. Meal’s on Wade, so don’t worry about it.” The warm breath on his ear made his head spin. Even without trying, Peter was making him fall hard, and he wasn’t faring much better with Wade’s naturally flirtatious personality.
Wade wrapped an arm around Merle’s shoulders with a laugh. “Yeah, don’t think. Just eat!”
That was a lot easier said than done.
The restaurant was spacious, the kind with complimentary wine bottles just for showing up. Merle was greatly out of his element, but he could tell Peter was, too, despite the young man’s attempts at fitting in.
They’d chosen a table in the corner of the restaurant, one with a huge window so they could look outside. Snow drifted down outside, and combined with the gentle murmur of patrons and the classical music played live in the background, it was almost…
Merle winced. He didn’t want to think like that. Why did they bring him here? It was very obviously a date night. Did they really pity him so much? Wade grinned, pouring a glass of red wine and pushing it Merle’s way. “I want to see if you can get drunk.”
Merle snapped back to attention, staring at the scarred older man in shock. “Why? I don’t generally drink…”
“Most superhumans can’t.” Peter explained, “Wade here is incapable of it unless he drinks Asgardian-grade.” That must suck. Truthfully, he’d never tried. His life was focused solely on the children, not trying new things or partying.
With a sudden realization that it was kind of sad, Merle took a deep breath, picked up the glass and downed it in two gulps. Peter’s mouth opened in shock, looking to a very amused Wade for how he was supposed to react.
“M-Merle,” Wade wheezed, “You’re supposed to drink it slowly.”
The shapeshifter shuddered, swiping his tongue over his lips to clear off any excess liquid that might’ve fallen from his lips. “That tasted awful.” he shook his head, clearing the fuzzy feeling that was falling over his brain.
“Maybe you should stick with just water.” Peter advised, eyes lighting up as the waiter came over to take their orders.
They ordered their appetizers and sent the man off as Wade leaned over the table toward Merle. “How’s Spaghetti and meatballs sound?”
“I didn’t even realize that was an option at such a high caliber restaurant.” Despite the numbness sinking into his brain, Merle was at least coherent. He didn’t hold drinks down well, but he definitely could fake it.
“Yeah! I think it sounds like a great idea.” Peter encouraged, a small smile on his face, watching the gears turning in Merle’s head.
Wade and Peter had snuck off after the movie to talk amongst themselves, discussing what would be the best course of action. The realization that without a clear explanation, Merle probably would never accept their advances, dawned on them as they did.
Merle hummed in agreement, finally. “Okay. If it means less money.” The truth was, Wade had already talked to the establishment–and told them what he’d wanted. For a bit of an extra price, of course. So all they had to do was wait.
“So Merle,” Wade prodded, “why not tell us about the time you got stuck as a caterpillar?” the ravenette choked on his drink, shaking his head wildly.
“N-no! That’s–that’s a stupid story. And not one quite uh, appropriate,” a blush rose up the man’s neck, resistant to the idea. Peter raised his eyebrows, curiosity shining in his brown eyes.
“I want to hear, too.” Peter grinned, “If you tell us about that, I’ll uh… hmm. I’ll tell ya about the time I fought off the green goblin.” That was a bit more tempting, because at least he wouldn’t be the only one sharing stories…
Their mindless chatter went on for a while before their food came, a big plate of spaghetti with plenty of meatballs.
That was sort of when the situation really hit Merle for real.
“Merle,” Peter tapped the table to get the shell-shocked man’s attention, “we have something to ask you.”
“I…” Merle swallowed hard, gaze shifting from Wade’s all-too-familiar smirk and Peter’s hopeful eyes.
Wade nudged a meatball over the plate to Merle’s side, and Peter did the same. The pounding uncertainty of what was about to happen was almost too much to bear for any of them, because rejection hurts .
“We’d like you to be our third. Y’know.” Wade stretched out a hand, palm up, inviting. “Partners.”
“Y-yeah!” Peter nodded quickly, “‘cause w-we both like ya lots, and you might not be into it, but–like–we thought we’d ask anyway, j-just in case…” the ramble blazed in Merle’s mind, threatening to burn him up inside.
His breath hitched. That was what he wanted. More than anything at that moment, and it was within his grasp. So close he could taste it. Or maybe that was the wine playing tricks on him. “A-are you guys serious?” he whispered, fingers twitching toward Wade’s, as if he couldn’t quite believe it was real.
“As a heart attack.” Wade puffed up proudly, only to get smacked on the side of the head for the comparison. “Ow!”
“I… heh.” Merle rubbed his eyes with a palm, hoping his face wasn’t too very red. “I’d like t-that a lot.” he reached out, finally, hesitantly pressing his soft palm into Wade’s calloused ones.
The man’s eyes lit up, and he looked over at Peter with a grin. “That went great! You know what this means, guys?”
Merle was almost too stunned to speak as Wade poured them both glasses of wine. They knew very well Peter and Wade couldn’t get drunk, but it was still fun.
Maybe they’d assumed Merle couldn’t, either, by how he was acting. But after about the third glass, he was pretty out of it. By the fifth, dinner was wrapping up, and they’d have the house to themselves for the evening, to do whatever they wished.
Peter wrapped his arms around Merle’s waist, trying to seem calm despite his heart pounding in his chest as he rested his cheek against the taller man’s side. “Nice night, huh?”
“Mm… a bit cold.” Merle replied, “I hope our uber doesn’t take long.”
“I already called Dopinder.” Wade offered, but not before also offering up his body heat to his partners. “Hey, Pete, you’re good right? No sleepiness?”
Peter blinked, as if he was shocked Wade remembered. “Oh, no. As long as I stay bundled up like I am now, it doesn’t get so bad.” Truthfully, Wade remembered the months where he’d search for Spider-man in winter, only to find the vigilante had wiped off the face of the Earth until spring, unable to keep himself awake and going into an unwilling deep sleep to save on energy.
But now that he had not
one
but
two
boyfriends, the odds of him stumbling into some decaying warehouse alone just to pass out for three months was slim to none.