Work Text:
“Would you do anything for us?” Robin asked him once, bundled together in a blanket in his bed after nightmares both shook them awake, clinging onto each other, hoping the other was enough to shackle them in reality.
When everyone is together, happy and just living, Steve can’t help but think he’d do everything and anything for them to be this happy for the rest of their lives.
The Upside Down, Steve thinks, has taken so much from him. He’s pieces of the person he used to be, the same person he also hates now, but Steve was blissfully ignorant then. Not knowing that there are things bigger than basketball games or love triangles. Sometimes he wants that back, and maybe he would be out by Hawkins by now, working in his father’s firm, unhappy but not broken.
No matter how much Steve wishes that he wasn’t part of any of this, part of this group who has saved the world five times in total now, he takes it back almost immediately, bites his tongue to swallow the words, lets the words burn in his lungs and stumps the feeling on the ground.
The Upside Down, no matter how cruel it has been for each of them and no matter how morbid it sounds, has led Dustin Henderson to him. With him came Lucas Sinclair, Erica Sinclair, Max Mayfield, Will Byers, Mike Wheeler and Jane Hopper.
It also bought him Robin, Nancy, Jonathan, Eddie and Argyle. A weird mix of friends that would’ve made freshman Steve laugh, but a group that older Steve would protect with his own life. Steve loves Robin, needs her like oxygen, needs her to physically function, needs her like a limb he didn’t know he lost when he was born. Steve loves Nancy, Jonathan, Eddie and even fucking Argyle.
But the kids. Steve loves the kids with such fervour he doesn’t even know he is capable of. He would bury a body for them, die for them and get arrested for them all in the same night, no questions asked.
Loving them comes easy, like a piece of his soul that has always been meant to be his. Everyone knows that what he had with the kids is different from the others' relationship with them. Even Jon with El and Will, Nancy with Mike and Eddie with Dustin. Maybe it’s because he’s spent the last five years of his life trying to keep those children alive, and now they’re repaying him through love hidden in jokes and playful shoves but with a glint of happiness in their eyes. It’s always a running joke, who is Steve’s favorite child? Robin and Nancy always joke that his favorite is Dustin or Max. Eddie says it’s definitely El.
The truth is Steve can’t choose, won’t ever choose. Gun to his head, he’d rather die than choose. He thinks he’ll love all of them differently but equally with the same intensity as the burning sun.
Steve loves Dustin Henderson in his annoying, insistent rants and his maddening love for nerd stuff, how Dustin wormed his way through Steve’s life and how it brought him the greatest happiness in his life. He loves Lucas Sinclair in his jock or nerd form, loves his resilience and headstrong nature that’s bundled with warmth and love. He loves Mike Wheeler in his distrust and irritation, like seeing himself in a broken mirror; loves the big heart Mike has for the people he loves. He loves Will Byers in his quiet gaze and wisdom beyond his age, loves him for his perseverance and his will to live his life even after everything.
The girls: Erica, Max and El, Steve will always have a softer spot in his heart for them. Robin likes to joke that they’ve got Steve wrapped in their fingers. Steve just smiles, and never denies it because it’s true. Steve loves Max in her fierce, tough exterior but charming, gentle interior. She’s Steve’s little miracle who defied death. Steve loves Erica in her sarcastic comments and clever truths. She’s Steve’s little smart ass who he’s sure will change the world when the time comes. Steve loves El in her wide-eyed wonder and honesty. She’s Steve’s little superhero who saved the world without hesitations.
Steve loves the kids, maybe loves them more than he loves himself. It won't ever change, won't ever waver.
For every kid, he remembers the moment each of them met. However, with El, he can’t place it. Maybe it’s because he just got a plate smashed in his head when they first supposedly met. Dustin says they met the night before, Steve even introduces himself, but Steve can't, for the love of God, remember that. What he remembers is waking up the next morning with El on the foot of Hop’s bed, watching Steve sleep with wide eyes and curiosity.
After that, El has been stuck to him like a barnacle. A barnacle Steve loved dearly. Hopper has him babysit El multiple times in the cabin. Steve always loved babysitting El. He loved her innate curiosity and her willingness to try anything and learn. They bond over watching telenovelas, music, cooking and most especially, hair.
Steve remembers helping El grow her hair, giving her tips and getting her all the conditioner and shampoos that would help it grow faster and shinier. When it was long enough, he helped her style it, even borrowing a blower and curling iron from his Mother’s bathroom. Hop would come home with the house smelling like a salon and wouldn’t even blink.
Everything was okay. For the first time in his life, everyone was okay until July 4th. Hopper dies, and Eleven clings to him harder until Joyce whisks her to California with her. One of the hardest decisions in his life might’ve been when El asked him to come with him, but Steve can’t, not when the kids are still in a town haunted by monsters, not when the Chief of police who knew about them died and not when he just dragged Robin Buckley into this whole mess. Joyce Byers is something else, a whole other entity, a mother who didn’t give up on her dead child, and Steve can’t think of anyone better for El to have by her side.
And then, the Upside Down is back and then finally gone, Hopper is alive, and the Hopper-Byers are now back in town. El and the government (nobody really cares about what they say) reassured them that it is truly over. So here they are, swimming in his backyard because Dustin has been insisting for the last week that the whole Party wanted to have fun.
“Henderson! No running around the pool!” Steve screams as he pulls the cooler out of the backyard.
“Stop being a wet blanket, Steve!” Dustin answers, before cannonballing, the sound of kids complaining coming right after.
“Dustin!” Nancy yelps from the pool lounge. She’s sharing the chair with Robin. Robin just smirks as Nancy tries to dry herself from the splash Dustin has created.
Steve drops the cooler near the patio table where the snacks are laid out. The sun is beaming high, and even with the short shorts and thin shirt, he’s still sweating. In the far end of the garden, Jonathan and Argyle are already high out of their minds, stargazing in the afternoon.
Steve thanks some kind of God that he’s wearing sunglasses because he stops what he’s doing when he sees Eddie lying on another lounge beside Nancy and Robin. He’s laughing as Robin animatedly retells some story. Eddie’s wearing a swim trunk that he stole from Steve’s dresser, and he was… shirtless. Gulping, he tears his eyes away from Eddie’s bare chest, with all of the pink scars and tattoos littered like pieces of art.
Refocusing his attention on the snacks helps control his urges for a certain metal head.
“Steve! Can you bring Nancy and me some pop?!” He turns his head to find the three of them now looking at him. Robin has her hands in a praying position and the best puppy eyes she can muster.
“Why don’t you stand up and get some for yourself?” Steve answers back, knowing damn well he’s gonna bring it over for her and Nance.
“Can you bring one for me too, pretty boy?” Eddie smirks at him, checking him out unsubtly.
Steve rolls his eyes, taking Pepsi cans— only Pepsi, because El has some kind of vendetta over Cokes— for the four of them before walking over to them. Nancy and Robin thank him before Eddie pats the space beside him on the small lounge, wiggling his eyebrows.
“Come on, Stevie.” Steve sighs before lodging himself in the tight space beside Eddie. Eddie’s arms naturally fall on his shoulders to keep him close. Steve resigns to opening his own can, sipping on it.
It’s so close and can be interpreted as something more than platonic. Eddie doesn’t care, though, because Eddie Munson is fearless in ways Steve wishes he could be. Steve’s also starting to think he maybe won’t mind being more than platonic with Eddie, but that’s something he has to talk to Robin about first.
Pushing himself to tear his eyes off Eddie as he sips his Pepsi, Steve lets his eyes wander around to the kids. They’re playing Marco polo, but as Steve does a head count, he realizes he’s missing a kid. A quick scan across the yard, Steve finds El on the poolside, her knees dipped in the pool. She had that empty look in her eyes as she stared out in the open space; her straw hat was barely showing her face, but Steve could see her eyes if he ducked down enough.
As lame as it sounds, Steve hears alarm bells ringing in his head like some dad warning.
“Hey, can you hold this for me?” He doesn’t even wait for Eddie’s reply as he hands the can to him and leaves the lounge as he walks straight to El.
“Hey, El.” She looks up, holding her hat in place, staring at Steve’s held-out hand, “Come help me get some popsicles?”
El looks unsure for a second, staring at his hand, before nodding and taking it. They walk inside the house, Steve shutting the sliding doors behind him before heading to the fridge.
“I got some popsicles. I got you some of those cherry ones you and Max like.” Steve’s not really sure what he’s doing or what he’s supposed to be doing. He's a pseudo-dad, not a real dad.
“Thank you.” El answers quietly, taking the box Steve hands her.
Other than hugging after their little reunion, they haven’t talked properly since the Vecna debacle, too many things happening all at one. El was weak for a couple of weeks, Hopper putting her on house arrest until now, and this is the first time they’ve got some time alone.
“You good?” Steve asks, opening the boxes and taking a grape popsicle for himself before sitting at the breakfast bar. El copies him, taking a cherry popsicle before sitting beside him.
El doesn’t open her popsicle, just sits beside him quietly. Silence with El has always been grounding and comfortable, but as they sit there in the breakfast bar just staring at the empty house, Steve is left feeling uneasy.
“Are you okay, El?” Steve asks, so quiet in the silence that it echoes in the empty house.
“My hair.” El crooks back, taking Steve by surprise.
“What about it?” Steve tilts his head in confusion. El takes her hat off, an answer in itself as she shows her shaved head.
Steve gulps the lump forming in his throat, looking at her. El’s hair has always been important to her. A symbol of freedom she’s never had since she was a child. Getting her powers back meant saving the world again, and hair shouldn’t be the most important thing in that pile, but for El, it is.
“It’s…” El’s lip quivers uncharacteristically, “ugly.” Steve physically feels his heartbreak at this statement, immediately jumping off his chair to scoop her in his arms.
“It’s not ugly, El. It’ll grow back, and we’ll style it again.” He can feel El shaking her head against his chest.
“No. I am tired. Papa shaves it, and I grow it. I grow it until it’s long and soft and curly, and then Papa shaves it again.” He tightens his embrace around El almost protectively, like Dr. Brenner himself would burst in the front door any minute.
Steve wants to cry and wrap all the kids with blankets and hide them in his pocket forever. But right now, one of those kids is crying in his arms, and it takes everything in him to calm down.
“El, I’ll get you more of that shampoo I got you before. It helped grow it out faster, right?” El sniffles against his shirt.
“No. I’ll never be beautiful.” Steve clenches his eyes closed. Dr. Brenner should be thankful the government killed him because if not, Steve’s sure he’ll commit murder right now.
“Honey,” Steve separates himself from El, stooping low enough in front of her, so they’re face to face. He looks at her, her eyes glassy and red-rimmed from crying.
“El— Jane, listen to me, you are beautiful. You are strong, kind and wonderful. Your beauty is more than just your hair.” Steve takes her hand, holding it in his. Steve ignores the clench in his heart when he vaguely remembers the first time El held his hand and how much bigger it is in his palm now.
“But beauty is important. You taught me that hair is important.” El replies, earnest and simple. Steve has to bite his tongue to stop the curse he wants to spit out.
‘84 Steve Harrington was an idiot. An idiot who was still learning to be a better person, who gave Dustin bad dating advice, and who gave importance to his looks and his hair because it was who the world told him to be.
Steve wants to make up a lie or an excuse to avoid being too personal and open. But El’s looking at him with such a dejected face, the same face that has been lied to so many times that Steve just blurts out the truth.
“I was wrong, El. That was younger me, that Steve… liked his hair because he thought that’s the only thing that makes him special… beautiful. You know?” He waits for El to understand, the words still sometimes confuse her, and it’s best to speak in a slow manner.
She nods, Steve continuing, “Now, I love hair because I think it’s fun and it’s my way of taking care of myself. I am beautiful not just because of my hair, but also because I am…” Steve pauses, thinking through lists of adjectives he learnt throughout his life. Kind? Generous? Caring? None of it feels right to him.
“I am strong,” Steve says, making El tilt her head in confusion.
“You are also gentle and caring,” El remarks, understanding that Steve is having a hard time giving himself compliments.
“That too.” Steve nods, ignoring the warmth spreading in his heart, “So do you get what I am saying? Beauty isn’t just hair. Beauty is who you are as a person.”
El still looks mournful, and Steve is ready to give another handful of advice and praise when he hears the sliding door open, followed by feet padding to the kitchen.
“Stevie, what’s taking so lon—” Eddie stops in his tracks when he sees Steve and El looking back at him, their position clearly showing that the conversation they were having was important. Before he can explain, he hears another set of footsteps, pushing Steve up to his feet and letting go of El as he hears Dustin and Will’s voices.
“Jesus, Steve, you took so long. Where’re the popsicles?” Dustin asks. God, Steve loves him, but how could someone so smart be so fucking oblivious?
“Have patience, Henderson.” Steve pushes the box on his chest as Will looks at him and then to his sister and then back to Steve and, for good measure, to Eddie, who’s still watching them interact intently. He stares at Steve for a few seconds
“Byers, need anything from the kitchen?” Will snaps back to reality, shaking his head.
“Uh, Are you free next Sunday, Steve?” Steve looks at him quizzically.
“Yeah. I am off. Do you need a ride somewhere?”
“No, my mom and Hop are having a barbecue in the new house. Some kind of housewarming, and they wanted you to come.” Will states.
Dustin’s noisily opening a popsicle before adding, “Robin’s already coming.” He adds, wiggling his eyebrows. Steve rolls his eyes before grabbing the forgotten cherry popsicle on the bar and opening it.
“You coming?” Steve asks, directing his question to Eddie as he offers El the popsicle. El takes it with a small smile and a quiet Thank you.
“Me?” Eddie points at himself as Steve locks eyes with him.
“Yeah, dude. Who else?” Steve scoffs. Will’s looking at him again and then at Eddie and then at Steve again. Some kind of understanding dawning on him, and damn it, Will’s too smart.
“Yeah. I am coming.” Eddie startles, like realizing that he’s been acting un-Eddie like for the last few minutes before smirking, and Steve’s brain goes, There he is.
“Why? Do you want me to be there, big boy?” Steve rolls his eyes.
“You wish, Munson.” Eddie raises an eyebrow at him.
“If you say so.” He winks at Steve and takes Dustin by the arm, leading him out of the kitchen and the house, “Come on, let’s bring the popsicles to the other gremlins.”
Steve turns back to Will; he’s sure he’s blushing from the damn wink, but Will’s looking at him like he just made everything in his life so much better, so Steve lets it be.
“Do I need to bring anything? Did Joyce say anything?” Will shrugs, tearing his eyes off Steve and to his sister, “You should call her. She just said to invite you guys.”
“How about you? Would you like anything specific? Chef Harrington would make it just for you guys.” Steve teases, nudging El and Will. El lets out a small giggle, and Will just blushes.
“I would like some of your mashed potatoes.” Steve flicks his hand like checking a box, “Mashed potatoes! Done!” He looks back at Will.
“How ‘bout you?” Will shrugs, “Uhm… I miss your peach pie?” Steve laughs, ruffling Will’s hair.
“You got it, Byers. Now go have some fun. Jump in the pool or something.” Will starts walking out, El following behind him.
Steve stops her by grabbing her arm, eyes filled with concern, “Are you good, El?”
El smiles, it doesn’t quite reach her eyes, and it kills something in Steve, “I’ll be okay.”
Before Steve can give her another set of reassurances, she’s out of his grasp with a sad smile and Steve’s left standing in his empty house with the ghost and mistakes of his younger self.
As Steve brushes his teeth, he doesn’t stop thinking about it. How El cried and mourned over her hair, how she cried so freely on his shoulders. It’s been a week since that day. The barbecue is tomorrow. The pie is in the fridge, ready to be put in the oven and the mashed potatoes just need seasoning.
Steve spits, gargling water to remove the remaining toothpaste, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand before looking at himself in the mirror.
Reaching up, Steve brushes a hand through his hair. It’s soft, it always has been. Steve has always prided himself on his routine, the confidence he has for every step, all of it inscribed in the back of his head. It started as a thing he and his mother did together until his father put a stop to that. Steve knows the younger version of him thought it was important to maintain it because that was the only thing people wanted with him, his looks. Robin helped with that, taught him that he was more than his looks, and he was more than just “The Hair.”
He takes his time smoothing down his hair. Taking off his attention to his hair and to his face, not to toot his horn, but he looks good. Handsome, even. He had long eyelashes, a pointy nose and a sharp jaw that defined his face. He’s littered with moles; some girls have called it his beauty marks.
Steve jumps when someone knocks at the open door, turning to see Robin playfully smiling at him, “Okay, Dingus, stop staring at yourself. I need to brush my teeth.”
Robin nudges him to the side of the sink, taking her green toothbrush that sits right beside Steve’s yellow toothbrush. Robin’s slept over so much that she’s already got everything she needs in his own room to sleep over. They’re standing side by side, looking at each other in the mirror.
Robin brushes her teeth, looking at him carefully in the mirror. When she finally spits and gargles, Steve’s not even surprised that she’s caught on his expression.
“What’s up with you? You’ve been… staring at yourself a lot this week.” Robin puts back her toothbrush, cleaning the counter with a tissue before turning to face him, hip leaning on the counter.
“Are you having a midlife crisis?” Robin teases, her voice soft and hesitant.
“No… I—” Steve pauses, still looking at himself in the mirror. Robin quietly waits for him to muster up the words, her eyebrows knitted in a daze.
“Do you think I’ll still look good without my hair?” Robin’s expression immediately softens.
“Is this about your hair again?” She quietly teases, with no malice or cruelty in her voice, “I mean, you’re not my type, but yeah, I think you’ve got a nice… face with or without the hair.”
Steve sighs, hands grabbing at the counter to anchor him to the moment. Robin sees his hesitation.
“Steve,” Robin holds both his shoulders to force him to face her, “You’re more than just your looks, more than just your hair. You’re soft-hearted and compassionate, and considerate. With or without your hair, you are Steve Harrington, and you are handsome and beautiful.”
Steve believes her, believes every word because Steve knows Robin will never lie to him, never would do anything to hurt him.
“Okay.” Robin straightens, smiling as Steve accepts her words.
“Okay?” Robin checks. Steve knows her enough to know that it’s her way of asking if he’s okay. Steve nods, smiling with certainty he hasn’t felt for a week.
He opens a drawer under the sink, pulling out the item he’s been looking at for a week, and handing it directly to Robin.
She looks at the trimmer in her hand, confused.
“Okay. Now help me shave my head.”
The pie was hot in his hands as Robin knocked at the Byers-Hopper's new residence, mashed potatoes in her hand. It’s bigger than the old Byers house and certainly bigger (and had fewer traps) than Hop’s old cabin. It had a porch that wrapped around the front, and he could hear the kids talking from the other side of the house.
They’re probably the last people to arrive. They woke up late from, well, a long night of Robin talking Steve off the ledge (the ledge that would lead him to a shaved head) and Steve explaining why he had to. So they did wake up late and still had to put the pie in the oven. Also, all the cars are already in the driveway, including Nancy’s car, the pizza van Argyle kept, and Eddie’s van.
Nancy opens the door, hand on her hips, feet tapping, “You’re both lat—?” She stops, tilting her head in confusion.
“What?” Robin and Steve both ask, acting as nonchalant as possible. When the truth is, they look like the twins from The Shining.
“You’re wearing a cap,” Nancy says, stating the obvious, pointing at Steve.
“Yes, Nance. This is a cap.” Steve answers, pulling the baseball cap lower in his head, making sure it’s secured.
“I’ve never seen you wear a cap. I’ve known you for almost five years.” Steve turns to Robin, who’s looking back at him with wide eyes.
“I am also wearing a cap!” Robin exclaims, because yeah, she’s also wearing another baseball cap, her hair tied in a ponytail and tucked in the cap.
Nancy stares at the two of them suspiciously.
“Are you… not gonna let us in because of the cap?” Nancy snaps out of the trance, opening the door wider to the new house. It’s gorgeous, and Steve immediately falls in love with the hominess of the house.
“Let me take that. They’re all in the back. We’ve started early because you two took so long.” Nancy takes the pie from Steve, still looking at the two of them skeptically.
Nancy struts to the backdoor, leaving the two of them in the house, “Dude, we’re gonna get caught. What is the plan?” Robin whispers as they walk as slowly as possible to the backdoor.
“I just need to talk and show El first before showing everyone. If they see it first, they're going to make a big deal out of it and then I won’t be able to talk to her.” Robin nods, pulling her cap lower on her face too. She’s wearing it to pull the attention off him, but it looks like it’s not working.
“How about you stay on the side, and then I tell El you’re looking for her, so you don’t have to go near the kids?” Robin offers, making Steve nod along the plan, “Yes. Okay. Let’s do that.” He snaps his fingers, pointing at the door.
They both stop at the backdoor. Robin turns to him, having to tilt her head to see him better with the cap.
“Are you ready for this, Charles Xavier?” Steve rolled his eyes. That was a new, fun game for Robin, at least. Robin’s been calling him names of bald people for the last 8 hours.
“Yes, stop calling me that,” Robin smirks, opening and stepping out the door to the backyard.
It’s big, and the first thing Steve thinks is how perfect it is for a dog. The kids are talking and laughing as they eat at a patio table. From where he’s standing, he can see El wearing another hat, and the image immediately breaks his heart. On the side, Jonathan, Nancy and Argyle are sprawled on a picnic blanket.
“Hey, sweetie!” Joyce gives Robin a hug, taking the mashed potato from her and setting it at the table, “You guys didn’t need to bring anything!”
“Not with this, Dingus. El and Will asked for those, and what those kids want, Steve gives.” Robin nudges him, making Joyce laugh as she pulls Steve into a hug.
“Thank you for that, sweetie.” Joyce separates, stopping to look at him for a second, “Something’s new with you.” The two of them immediately freeze.
“Uhhh…” Steve turns to Robin, who looks as dumbstruck as him.
“He lost weight!” Robin exclaims, nodding her head like she’s actually convincing herself of this lie.
“Oh! Yeah! Yes! I lost weight.” Steve repeats, nodding his head along, Joyce squinting at them in confusion.
“You didn’t lose weight.” A new voice adds as Eddie fucking Munson appears out of nowhere like a damn magician. He pops up from behind Joyce, and when he moves, Steve can see Hop barbecuing with Dmitri on the far end of the yard.
“I didn’t?” Steve answers, wincing when it comes out as a question rather than a statement. Eddie gives him a once over, blinking a few times, as he stares at Steve. Not that Steve isn’t doing the same, not when Eddie’s hair is up in a bun, and he’s wearing a shirt that actually showed his surprisingly toned muscles.
“You’re wearing a cap,” Eddie states, and it must be the humidity because Steve’s sure Eddie’s face just flushed.
“Yes, and I am wearing one too!” Robin announces, breaking the staring contest they’ve got going, pulling him back to reality. Robin widens her eyes at him, a signal that says get your shit together!
Steve nudges her and angles his head to the kids. Robin nods, patting him on the shoulder before moving to the kids. He looks back to find Joyce and Eddie looking at him like he’s a specimen to be studied.
“This is a nice house!” Steve breaks the silence, gesturing to the yard.
“Oh yes! We got it for cheap, you know, after the earthquake. It fits the whole extended family just perfectly. Even with extra rooms when you boys need a place to stay.” Joyce pats them both on the shoulder before leaving them when Hop calls her name, “You boys go enjoy, okay?” They both nod, watching her leave.
“What’s up with you, pretty boy?” Eddie asks as soon as Joyce is far enough.
And fuck, Eddie, calling him pretty boy has him kind of weak in the knees. Steve’s trying to suffocate that tiny voice in his head that’s saying he won’t find you pretty anymore now that you’ve shaved your pretty hair.
“Nothing’s up with me.” Steve declares after he finishes his own internal war.
“Stevie, I’ve never seen you with a cap ever. Your hair is too precious for that.” Steve wants to snicker and answer something snarky like no more my precious, and sit on a rock with wide eyes like he just went crazy over a magical ring or something. But before he can answer, Robin comes marching towards them, El beside her.
“Riff Raff,” Robin says, giving him a two-finger salute before walking away. Steve groans, Riff Raff wasn’t even fully bald in Rocky Horror.
“Hey, El. Can we talk?” El quietly watches him before nodding and entering the house again. Steve looks back at Eddie, who’s staring at him with such intensity he hasn’t seen before.
“Talk to you later, Eds.” Steve reaches up to pat Eddie’s cheeks before darting away because what the hell did he just do? Steve follows El into the house without even hearing Eddie’s response.
El leads him to a room, which he thinks is hers, from the way the bed had floral sheets and with the way the walls were boarded up with pictures of them.
“Is this your room? It’s very pretty, El.” El hums a thank you as she sits on the foot of her bed, patting the space beside it for Steve to sit on.
Steve sits beside her, the silence filling in the room. They can hear them laughing from the yard and people talking, but the house is quiet inside.
“What is up?” El asks, looking at him quizzically before the realization dawns on her, “You’re wearing a hat.”
“Yeah. I— Listen, El,” Steve scratches the back of his head, trying to form the right words, “I was wrong when I told you that hair was important for beauty. I think beauty is what we have inside.”
El nods, but she doesn’t look fully convinced.
“I am going to show you something. I need you not to freak out, okay?” El watches him intently before replying, “Okay.”
“Okay.” His hand shaking, he reaches out to remove his cap. Immediately subconsciously giving his shaved head a rub.
El gasps, her voice wet and quivering, “Your hair!”
“I know. Now, I have a question.” Steve takes her hand, pulling her off the bed and facing the two of them in the mirror above her dresser. She’s gotten so tall that she stops just above his chin.
In the mirror, Steve looks at El, who’s looking at him with glassy eyes, “Am I ugly now, El?” El shakes her head vehemently.
“No! You’re still handsome even with no hair!” El exclaims, looking up at him as tears cling to her eyes.
Steve removes her hat, facing her against the mirror again, “And so are you. You’re beautiful with or without hair because that’s not the important thing. The important thing is that you’re good and kind and caring. You are all those things, Jane and even more.” El sobs, pulling Steve into a hug and crying on his shirt. Steve just lets her cry it out, calming her down the best he can, whispering words of reassurance.
When she’s finally calmed down, eyes still brimming with tears but not sobbing anymore, Steve asks, staring directly at her eyes, “Do you believe me now, El? That you’re beautiful even without hair?”
El smiles through the tears, and Steve could burst when it’s real, when it reaches her eyes even with the tears, “Yes.”
They hug once more before they separate. El lets her hand touch his shaved head, “Your hair. You didn’t have to do that.”
“It’s okay. I wanted to do it. I’ll do it again if I need to.” El doesn’t look satisfied, even kind of looks guilty, “It’ll grow back. Just like yours would, and now we can grow them together, and we can go buy shampoo and stuff together.”
El brightens up immediately, “Thank you, Steve.” She gives him one more hug, and Steve can’t help but think he’d shave his head again and again for any of these kids.
“You’re welcome, El.” They stand there just watching each other in the mirror before he hears Joyce calling them.
“Want to see how they react to my shaved head?” Steve wiggles his eyebrows at her making her giggle.
“Yes!” They walk out back to the yard, both without their hats and El clinging to his arm.
Dustin’s the first one to see it, and of course, he’s the most dramatic of them all.
He gasps, dropping his plate at the table as he clutches his heart like he’s having a heart attack, running full speed across the yard to where he and El are standing, “WHO DID THIS TO YOU!? STEVE, WHO DID THIS?! I WILL KILL THEM.” It’s enough for everyone to turn their heads in their direction, sounds of gasps and shock following.
“Please, Henderson. You’re being dramatic.” Dustin’s kneeling in front of him, clutching his jeans and crying. Steve’s actually not sure if he’s faking it or not.
“Why!? Tell me why!?” El’s giggling beside him as all the kids come running up to him, inspecting him like he’s a brand new toy.
“Do you have cancer?” Mike asks, actually looking concerned, like that’s the only possible reason Steve would let anyone shave his head.
“No, dipshit. I just wanted to shave it.” Every kid aside El, gasps again.
“But it’s your hair!” Mike exclaims, Lucas nodding along before adding, “I swear to God, I think I’ve heard a rumour going around in Hawkins High that it had healing powers.”
Max slaps the back of his head, “And you fucking believed that?”
“No! But! It’s Steve “The Hair” Harrington!” Lucas exclaims. Robin popping magically beside him.
“He is more than just hair! He’s my dingus!” Robin defends, going into guard dog duty almost immediately.
“I think it looks good!” Will pipes, thumbs up in the air as he smiles, looking back and forth at him and his sister.
“Thank you, Lil Byers!” Robin points at him with finger guns.
“I think he also looks good,” El adds, smiling up at Steve. Robin high-fives with her.
“But Steve! Your hair, why? WHY!?” Dustin raises his hands like he’s screaming at the sky, “WHY!?”
“Dude, okay, calm down. I just wanted something new for a change. Freaking calm down. It’ll grow back out.” Steve explains, helping Dustin up on his feet again as he sulks.
“Harrington, looking good,” Max says, winking at him with a smile as she hooks her arms with her best friend and nods at him with approval.
Dustin’s still holding a funeral for his hair, Lucas and Will actually having to comfort him when Hopper calls him over.
“Harrington.” Hop greets, turning over some of the patties. Dmitri is sitting beside Joyce, talking and laughing.
“Hop.” He greets back, accepting the plate Hop gives him.
They’re quiet for a few minutes as Hop flips more patties and puts them on the plate in his hand.
“She’s been wearing that hat for weeks now.”
Steve hums in confusion, “What?”
Hop clears his throat, “Jane. She’s been wearing the hat for weeks now. No matter what we say, it won’t work; she won't take it off.”
Steve nods, holding the plate of patties in his hand, not knowing what to say.
“Thank you.” Hop finishes, surprising Steve.
“Oh, you don’t have to thank—”
Hop shakes his head, “Yes, I do. You just shaved your head so that my daughter could feel better. Thank you, Steve. You… you’re a good person.” Steve gulps, his clutch on the plate tightening. He’s never told anyone (okay, Robin excluded) that he sees Hop as the closest thing to a father.
Hopper telling him he’s a good person? It’s the closest thing he’ll get to a father figure telling him that he’s proud of him.
And like he can actually hear his thoughts, Hop continues, “You’ve grown so much. I am proud of you.” Steve’s knees actually buckle in surprise, making him almost drop the plate, but he steadies himself on the grill.
On the grill.
The pain registers so fast that Steve’s yelping as he pulls his hands away from the grill. He thankfully drops the plate on the grill rather than the ground. In his peripheral view, he can see the others looking at them.
“Are you okay?” Hop asks, concerned eyes washing over Steve as he clutches his own hand.
“Yeah. Uh, I think I am. I’ll run it under cold water.” Before Hop can say anything else, Steve zooms away from him into the kitchen, immediately feeling immense relief when cold water heats his palm.
It doesn’t look too bad, doesn't even hurt that much when it's under the cold water, just red from the wires of the grill. He doesn't know how long he stands there, not even minding the pain as he lets Hop’s words sink into him, letting them engrave in his skin to patch up the broken words his father has forcefully written on him.
“Hey.” Steve jumps, splashing water all around in surprise.
Eddie laughs as he sets the first aid kit beside him, “Just here to help. Joyce said it’s best to wrap it.”
“I think I am okay,” Steve says, turning the water off and wiping his hand off a kitchen towel, stinging as he wipes it, making him hiss in contact.
“Come on, Stevie. Let me wrap it.” Eddie pushes him to the dining kitchen to sit at the table.
They sit there in silence as Eddie wraps Steve’s hand in a bandage. The simple touch sends electricity sparks down Steve’s spine. God, he’s been so busy overthinking about El that he’s forgotten about an impending sexuality crisis he had to hash out with Robin.
This close, Steve can see Eddie’s determined gaze as he wraps the bandage as gently as possible; he’s doing that thing he does when he’s concentrating, his lips stuck between his teeth, with brown eyes filled with determination. His hair is up in a bun, framing his face in ways different when it’s just down. Steve lets his eyes dance over Eddie’s features, a defined jawline with a sharp nose and pink lips that Steve thinks about at night. Jesus H. Christ, he’s so fucking beautiful.
Steve could kiss him now, just grab him by the shirt and let himself drown in Eddie. It’s not even the fact that Eddie might not like him back that scares him, Eddie’s been flirting with him endlessly the last few months, and Steve’s not that dumb not to notice. It’s the fact that Steve doesn’t know what he is yet, and Eddie’s always been sure of himself. He knows he likes Eddie, wants to kiss him senselessly and maybe hold hands and watch sunsets together or some shit. But he— Steve doesn’t want to ever hurt Eddie, and the only way he can do that is if he’s sure of himself. Because Eddie Munson deserves the best, and he can't be the best when he doesn't even know what he is.
Eddie pulls back, a proud smile growing on his face, “Tada! All done, pretty boy.”
“Still a pretty boy even without the hair?” Steve blurts out, eyes wide, when he meets Eddie’s fond eyes.
“Fishing for compliments now, are we?” Eddie chuckles. Steve chews on his lips, nervous and waiting for some kind of approval from Eddie.
Eddie softens when he realizes, closing the first aid kit to avoid Steve’s eyes, “More so than ever.”
“Thank you,” Steve says, lifting the bandaged hand to wave it, but Steve knows it’s more for his approval.
Steve stands, turning his back to Eddie to go back to the yard, when Eddie speaks, “For the record, I think you're pretty with or without the hair. But what you did for El? That… that makes you beautiful, Steve Harrington.”
Steve stops in his tracks, his heart beating against his ribs in ways he’s never experienced before. This could be Eddie’s doing, or he’s having a heart attack. He can hear his footsteps behind him, stopping just beside him. Eddie grins at him, a twinkle in his eyes he’s never seen.
“Eddie.” Steve whispers, his good hand finding Eddie’s in the close space, intertwining them together.
“Steve.” Eddie squeezes his hand, a soft smile on his face.
“I need to talk to Robin,” Steve says, his voice wavering, hoping that Eddie gets what he’s trying to say, to just give him time to figure it out. Something settles in his heart when Eddie laughs.
“Talk to her. I’ll be waiting, Stevie.” Eddie reaches up to pat his cheeks before leaning in to kiss his cheek. It startles Steve, heat spreading on his face.
“Want a burger? I’ll fix you one.” Steve can’t do anything, but nod as Eddie leads them outside. Steve sits with the kids, sitting beside Robin and saving a seat for Eddie beside him.
“Cool shaved head, dude.” Argyle compliments from across him.
“Yeah, it looks good, Steve.” Jonathan gives him a thumbs up, so similar to the face Will gave him a while ago.
Someone gives his head a ruffle, making him look up and see Nancy smiling at him, “It looks good on you, Steve.”
“Thank you.” Nancy grins, dropping a kiss on his head before moving to sit beside Jonathan.
In the distance, he can see Eddie making burgers with Joyce and Hop, laughing about something Dmitri said.
“I need to talk to you later.” Steve turns to Robin and whispers quietly as she munches on her burger.
“What? You’re having another crisis? We just finished the hair thing, dingus.” Robin jokes teasingly. Steve just stares at her with wide eyes, making her drop the smile.
“Another one?” Steve nods; he’s about to comb his hair when he realizes there’s none anymore, so he resorts to scratching his head.
“Okay, but if this goes on, I’d have to start charging you per hour.” Robin teases, with no malice in her voice. Steve smiles, nudging her.
“You did good, Dingus,” Robin whispers beside him, the cap still in her head as she points her thumb to a smiling El.
“Thank you for shaving my head.” Robin rolls her eyes, but her smile is nothing but fond.
“You’re welcome, Uncle Fester.”
“Robin.” Steve groans as Robin cackles beside him, shoving fries in her mouth as she laughs.
“Here you go.” Eddie sets down a plate in front of him, taking a sit beside him. The burger’s cut into four pieces.
Oh.
Eddie cut his burger for him so he won’t have a hard time eating it with a bandaged hand.
“Thank you.” He whispers, his voice laced with disbelief. Steve knows he’s good at caring for others, never at accepting care from others. But Eddie… Eddie makes him want to be cared for.
“You’re welcome, pretty boy. Go eat. I don’t want you to lose weight or something.” Eddie nudges him playfully, smiling brightly at Steve.
Steve looks around the table as he watches Jon and Nancy get into a heated debate as Argyle mediates. Robin’s laughing at him for trying. Eddie’s beside him, a smile stuck on his face as he listens to the kids. The kids are eating their burgers and chattering. Dustin’s still waxing poetic about his hair like it died, and the other kids are just laughing at his theatrics. Steve meets El's eyes, a laugh bubbling from her. She looks happier, and the smile she gives Steve makes her glow.
Steve sighs, content in this little family he has built for himself, letting himself take a bite out of the burger someone has cut up for him.
Steve remembers Robin’s question in moments like this, moments filled with laughter and bright smiles. Remembers that night, the way they held each other after nightmares and his answer, fast without a beat of hesitation, without a doubt in his body, “I’d do anything for you guys.”