Work Text:
as soon as he'd arrived back at his dorm, the ravenette collapsed limply onto his mattress- boots and all. he'd arranged a study meeting with his kyoudai and his classmates, but today he just... couldn't. he couldn't, he couldn't, he couldn't-
his e-handbook vibrates.
'how unbefitting,' the voice hisses, 'so much for being a "moral compass". what good is guiding others when you can't even guide yourself?'
the only response he could give was a wet sob into his pillow. this is pathetic, he thought, what would father think? the vision of his father's agitated face made him flinch.
'he'll be disappointed in you, kiyotaka. he'll think you're pathetic, kiyotaka. he'll never love you, kiyotaka.'
he rolled over and idly traced the ceiling blemishes with his eyes. eventually it became an impossible task with the amount of tears pooling in those monstrous scarlet orbs, so he opted to just stare blankly instead.
'you are an utter failure. what good is a prime minister who can't even get over his own illogical emotions to do his duty? you'll never get anywhere. what will your classmates think? what will mondo think? heck, your classmates probably already hated you for being a too-loud ignorant hardass, but now they hate you MORE. you're of no use to them like this. make sure you ask them to hit you as punishment when you leave the room- you know it's less painful when you're expecting it.'
dully, he remembers an old classmate from his time at kaiseidan. a boy with dusty blue hair and an unimpressed gaze. he'd enlisted kiyotaka's assistance in studying, and kiyotaka, being the all too-trusting interaction-deprived sheep that he was, eagerly obliged. eventually they became the best of friends- so he thought.
unsurprisingly, it was a ruse. kiyotaka hadn't really known what he was expecting, to be honest. surely he hadn't actually believed someone would want to be friends with a... 'ugly, pathetic, loudass effing faggot' like him? surely.
they, the boy and his secret entourage had beaten him within inches of his life that night. 'it's okay,' he'd thought feebly. 'i'm fine.'
crack. his nose had begun to bleed.
'this is fine.'
slam. there went his breath.
'they're only helping me improve by teaching me a lesson. that's all. it was all me. i did something wrong.'
clash. punch. kick. his vision went fuzzy. was he even standing anymore?
'they're nice people, it was me who was the problem. this is justified. wrongful actions need punishment. this is a good thing. they're helping me learn. they're helping me...'
his consciousness slipped away to the sounds of cruel laughter.