Chapter Text
April 17th, 4:22 PM
ERIC TAKES A few moments to adjust the camcorder. His forehead creases in concentration as he carefully mounts the bottom of the Panasonic on the car dashboard.
After a few tries, he's satisfied. “I think I finally got it,” he mutters to himself before clicking the red button on the side.
“So, just a few more days until Judgement Day,” Eric states as he reclines the passenger seat.
“How you feelin’ Vodka?” He asks Dylan as he comes in full view of the lens.
Dylan half smiles and glances at his friend. He then speaks into the camera, slow and concise. “Fucking amazing. What about you Reb?”
Eric lites a Camel, blows a stream of smoke directly at the lens. “I feel spectacular. We’re going to kick-start a revolution! You guys will all die and it will be fucking soon!”
Dylan rests his hand behind his neck and sighs. “I can’t fucking wait,” he murmurs.
In less than 72 hours, they would be completing NBK, after years of planning, compiling the secretive and horrifyingly wicked details in their journals and private videos, here it was.
It almost gave Dylan a euphoric sensation, it was better than any buzz or high he had ever felt in his entire life. He felt God-like, like he could lift the sky with one hand. He was in control now.
In just three days, they would become known as the pair of young boys who marched onto the campus of Columbine High armed with rifles, taking as many as they could with them.
Who would’ve thought fate would bring him and Eric together in such a catastrophically beautiful way?
Who would’ve thought when they met each other at Ken Caryl Middle School, five years later, they would become best friends and develop a bond so extremely rare and unique?
After all, that’s why they were spending the afternoon in Dylan's car together, documenting the last moments of their lives before they commit an act of great malevolence that would forever be remembered.
It would be an utter massacre and then they would kill themselves. They would finally be at peace.
And to be able to find somebody willing to die by your side, firing the gun after screaming “three!” is almost impossible to do. But here they are, they found each other and they are going to do this. Together.
There was no going back now, if there was ever a chance to change his mind, it had long passed. Dylan has a partner, his best friend that he owed it to to keep pushing through and planning with.
After years, months, weeks, days, he was ready. Tired of being a prisoner of his own mind, he would no longer have to hide behind a constant mask, putting on a show for everyone in his life, constantly lying to those close to him.
He listens to Eric ramble into the camera about the school shootings that occurred the previous year.
“Fuck Mitchell Johnson, Michael Carneal, fucking bitches. Pussy losers!” Eric blusters, jabbing his finger at the lens.
“Do not think we’re trying to copy them or anyone! We had the idea before the first one ever happened. Our plan is better, not like those fucks in Kentucky with camouflage and .22s.”
Dylan stares at the tiny crack forming in the windshield. There would be so much he would no longer have to endure, the depression, the madness that felt like a cloud hanging over his head, the bullying, the tormenting, but it was more than that.
He wishes he could offer a better explanation for exactly why, there was only so much they could elucidate in the videos they had been compiling over the past few years, and even so, it just wasn’t that simple.
It would never be.
How could Dylan ever convey to his mom and dad, his friends - the few he did have, about his hateful detachment from the world? The dark fantasies he has, so horrid and vile. He didn't even feel human most days.
How could they ever understand? And what about Dani? The girl he loved, the girl he loves with every part of him, so much it hurt? She would never understand.
She was a fighter, one of the strongest people he ever met. She wasn't weak like they were. She wouldn't just give up and off herself.
He wonders what she will think of him after, after it becomes broadcast on the news, the radio, their two faces plastered on the front cover of Time: The Monsters Next Door: What Made Them Do It?
The only person who understood him was Eric. And even after discovering the two of them together on his own fucking couch, oh god, how much it destroyed him inside, he would still push through and they would do this. Together. No matter what.
And somehow, strangely enough, Dylan understood, he wouldn't hold it against his friend.
Eric Harris, a depressed, obsessive, immature, virgin, had never seen a girl's rack, never even kissed a girl, so it only made sense that when given the opportunity, of course he would want to experience what Dylan had, just a small taste before he blasted his own brains out.
And he deserved that, at least. It wasn't like he would ever get another chance.
So in a way, yeah, Dylan understood.
And besides, in the end, it didn't really matter.
Did it?
Eric clicks off the camera and turns to Dylan. "So, prom with Robyn? Nice."
Dylan frowns. "Not really. I'm only going because she asked me and my parents are paying for the tickets."
Eric shrugs, "Lucky you. Brandi told me no, 'I hadn't planned on going to the prom'," he says in a mimicking tone. "Yeah right, stupid fucking bitch," he mumbles.
"Trust me. You're not missing out on much," Dylan tells him. He pauses and then asks, "Were you able to see Dani by the way? And uh, drop off the letter?"
Eric lets out a groan, "Dude yes! I thought I already told you. She's going on the trip. She will be long gone before NBK. Chill out."
Dylan nods, "Ok. Thanks."
Eric rolls his eyes and smirks. "Sure thing, that's what best friends are for, right?"
“Move Randy!”
The young busboy turns his head, giving Dani a puzzled look, his thick bottlecap glasses sliding to the tip of his nose.
“Move, please!” She begs, “these plates are hot as shit!”
He shifts to the left slightly, allowing her to brush past him and she makes her way around the corner. Dani carefully approaches the group of giggling teenagers, reeking of weed.
“I have a grilled cheese?” Dani says to the table.
They stare at her blankly and then a red head in hot pink finally perks up, “Oh. That’s mine!”
Dani forces a smile and hands her the plate. "And the jumbo dog? With fries?"
The boy on the left side of the booth raises his hand with a small smirk. "I have the jumbo dog, how'd you know?"
The table erupts with laughter and Dani looks askance at him.
She frowns, "I'm not sure. X-ray vision maybe," she tells them as she finishes passing out the rest of the meals.
As she walks away from the table, she hears one of the boys ask his friend, "Would you tap that?"
"Hell no, well . . . maybe. If I double bagged it, you know project girls don't abort."
The two boys snicker together, it makes Dani's ears want to bleed but at least it was time for her break. Fucking finally. She feels like she could breathe again.
Her shift started at four PM and it was now a quarter past ten, though the diner didn’t start to get really busy until about an hour ago.
It was prom night, Dani guessed by the fancy tuxedos and gowns, the chunky glitter eyeshadow and smell of Rave Hair Spray.
She heads to the break room to retrieve her cigarettes when Stacy stops her, “Hey babes, you just got sat with a table.”
Dani gives her friend a death glare and lets out a long sigh. “Seriously?”
Stacy laughs, holding her hands to her chest. "Don't kill me, I’m just the messenger."
"Sorry," Dani apologizes. "It's just been a long night."
Stacy gives her a warm smile. "I know, for you and me both. But hey, at least you’ll make some good money tonight. And tomorrow is your birthday," She chirps. "You just have to get through tonight."
Dani nods, "You're right."
Maybe she did have something to look forward to after all, while she wasn't going to spend her birthday out partying or getting drunk like most nineteen year olds, she was considering taking some time off from work, running away for a bit.
Some time out of town by herself, a cabin in Rio Grande, right on the beautiful Southern Rocky mountains, it sounded wonderful, actually pretty fucking amazing: "a unique retreat offering refined luxury with the rustic charm and inspiration of a wilderness enclave. Relax by the river at the picnic and fire pit area or go for a dip in the hot tub surrounded by our flower garden."
So yeah, Dani would be a complete fucking fool not to go. But still, the entire situation felt bizarre and odd. Eric suddenly showing up at the diner last night, dropping off the letter from Dylan, inside it enclosed the directions to Riverside Meadows.
Supposedly, Dylan had planned the entire trip months prior, he rented out the cabin as part of her birthday gift.
It was supposed to be a surprise, they were supposed to go together but clearly, that wasn’t happening.
The letter still sat in the glove box of her Tacoma and there was a part of Dani that wasn’t even sure if she wanted to go on the trip. There was this part of her that wants absolutely nothing to do with Dylan.
Ever since she found out about the lies, about the secrets he was keeping from her, the broken promises, she would get this feeling.
This feeling like she would never be enough. And for the love of her, she could never understand why. Was she not pretty enough? Was she not smart enough, funny enough? What the fuck was it?
Why couldn't he just stop fucking drinking? Why couldn't he just get help like he promised her he would?
Sometimes when she thought about him, she felt like she couldn't breathe, other times, all she could do was cry. But recently, when she thought about him, her heart didn't ache anymore.
At least, not as much.
And maybe to others in her situation, they would be able to look past the lies, the manipulation and betrayal, but not Dani.
She had been hurt, let down too many times by others in her life but out of all, Dylan had hurt her the most. And maybe, she did forgive him but she would never forget the way he made her feel.
Dani heads back to her section, her pen and notepad ready, only one more hour until she could go home. One more day and she would be the hell out of this shit-hole town, she couldn't wait to escape from everyone and everything.
Dani greets the table, she recites the dinner special she has memorized down to a tee.
She reaches into her apron, pulls out a handful of straws, "And for beverages, we offer coffee, and . . . " She glances up from the notepad, their eyes meet each other from across the table.
The last time she saw Dylan was two weeks ago, when she returned the apartment key, it's nice seeing you Dani and I wish you the best. . .
His hair is slick back, black tuxedo, bow tie, and a red boutonniere pinned to the jacket lapel. Dani had never seen him in a suite before. He looks handsome, she thinks to herself.
". . . And, uh we have tea, and Coke products. What would we like tonight?" She finishes.
Dylan licks his lips and looks away from her. He has this uncomfortable and awkward look on his face, as if he and Dani hadn't spent the past six months of their life together, waking up and falling asleep next to each other.
The girl to his left, his date Dani assumes, orders first. Robyn was her name, Dani had met her once or twice but she doubted the girl even remembered her. She seemed sweet though and she was gorgeous, blonde, hazel eyes, tan skin.
Dylan clears his throat before he tells Dani his order. "I'll just have a cheese burger please, no mayo and a Dr. Pepper please."
"Sure thing," Dani tells them meeting Dylan's eye once more and then she glances towards Robyn. "I'll put the orders in and I'll be right back with the drink guys."
Dani returns promptly with the beverages, Dylan watches as she turns her back and leaves the table.
"A cheese burger sounds good," Robyn says after a moment. "But I think I'll like the potato soup too."
"Mhm," Dylan replies. "I've had their soup before, it's really good."
"Maybe we can get dessert too, if we're still hungry."
Dylan nods and then excuses himself, "Yeah. Maybe. I have to go to use the restroom, I'll be right back Robyn."
She smiles at him, "Sure."
Dylan leaves the booth and walks out the side exit, he knew where he would find her.
Dani, leaning against the brick wall, a cigarette in her hand. She didn't have the right to be pissed at him, but here she was, almost shaking. They broke up less than a month ago and he has the nerve to show up at her job with his new girlfriend?
It was a little harsh, isn't it? What a fucking asshole, she thinks to herself.
She didn't even think Robyn was his type, she was a sweet little church girl who moved here from Texas freshman year. Dani takes a deep breath and suddenly, she hears footsteps.
"Hey."
She stares at Dylan, the menthol placed firmly in between her lips.
Dylan tucks his hands into his pockets like he always did. "I just want to talk to you for a second."
"Okay."
"Eric, he told me he dropped by last night."
Dani blows a stream of smoke, "Yeah. He did," she replies with a glare. She wants to stop there but it all came spilling out.
"It's kinda funny," she adds. "You have your little friend stop by, oh no, you couldn't bear to do it yourself and see me, but you have the nerve to show up at my job the very next day with your new girlfriend? Get fucking real, Dylan."
Dylan sighs, "No. You have it all wrong Dani. Robyn - she's not my girlfriend. We're just friends. Okay?"
Dani raises an eyebrow. "Didn't really think prom was your style. Thought you were too cool. But she's cute, congrats."
Dylan frowns. "Can you stop with the little jokes for two fucking seconds please? Robyn asked me to prom, I wasn't even going to go. And I didn't even want to come here to eat, she picked the restaurant."
Dani pulls long and hard, flicks ash onto the pavement.
Dylan continues, "and about last night, I was working late. That's why I asked Eric to stop by and see you, so he could tell you about the cabin. I want you to be able to do something nice for your birthday."
Dani watches the lit end of the cigarette move farther and farther down.
"I'm going on the trip, okay? I know it means something to you and I would hate for it to go to waste, especially since it's already paid for and all. . . plus, it does sound nice," she admits.
"You deserve it," Dylan says. He stares at her, she stares back at him and it was the first time in weeks since he had seen her and she still had the ability to make his heart stop in his chest.
This would be the last time he would ever see her. The last and final time he would ever Danielle, he knew this. He needs to make it count, he needs to make sure she knows.
"It'll be nice to get out of town for a bit. I drove up there when I booked the cabin and had the chance to check out the place. It's honestly beautiful Dani."
She tosses her cigarette onto the ground. She tells Dylan thanks before she heads back into the diner.
"Wait," he calls to her.
She turns to him, "Yeah?"
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry about the drinking and lying to you." I'm sorry I'm not going to be able to shield you from what's going to happen but just know, I tried my best. "I'm so sorry about everything."
Dani nods her head. "It's okay. Some things just aren't meant to be, ya know?"
Dylan chuckles and she found it odd, she wasn't trying to be funny, but on the list of things Dani didn't quite understand about Dylan Klebold, this one would be placed on the very bottom.
"Have a good night Dylan, it was nice seeing you. Maybe, I'll see you around?"
"Yeah, maybe."