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As Ty pulled himself up higher and higher, the voices of Kit and Livvy drifted into incomprehensible backround noise. He climbed effortlessly, chasing the euphoria that came from being up high. Being away from everything.
As enjoyable as spending time with Livvy and Kit had been, eventually he had needed a break as he often did from people. For some reason staying around other people for too long made his head ache and his skin itch. Like something was stuck inside him. He pulled himself ontop of the cliffside he was climbing and perched comfortably, observing Kit and Livvy from a birdeye view.
Kit looked so different from up there, almost like a small blond blob of sorts which was amusing. But Ty could still recognize him even miles away. The details of everything Kit were simply too difficult to miss.
It was a little strange Ty supposed, how quickly Kit had become someone to him. Become significant, essential even.
Irreplaceable.
He could have never envisioned this in the beginning when he first saw Kit. That Johnny Rook's son who he had once held at knife point would become honestly one of if not, the closest friend Ty had ever had. In the beginning he had felt something. A pull, a tether of some sort, but he assumed it was mostly curiosity. He wanted to unravel the mystery that was Kit and it only became more and more involved.
When Kit had barricaded himself in one of the spare rooms, now his room, Ty most likely should have stayed away. But he felt that same pull and a bizarre overwhelming urge to be close to the boy. And that desire had only grown.
It was mildly concerning how Ty could feel himself becoming obsessed the way he obsessed over Sherlock Holmes. He wanted to learn everything about Kit, to crack him open and study his insides. Ty wanted to touch him, like he had in the kitchen that day when he put the iratze on him. He wanted to touch him all over, to hold him close, to slip underneath his skin and make a home there.
It was a terrifying thought.
He glanced back over his shoulder at Livvy and Kit out of curiosity to see the two of them getting closer together.
Ty knew he shouldn't be spying but he was almost morbidly transfixed as he watched Kit carefully curve his arm around Livvy's shoulders and pull her towards him, kissing her gently.
There was a blinding stabbing pain in his chest as though he had been run through with a seraph blade. Ty's vision began to blur and his ears rung.
Breathe, he reminded himself. Whenever he felt like this he needed to remember to breath, or to move, to rock do anything to calm himself down. He tried to tear his gaze away from Kit and Livvy but it was as though he were watching a trainwreck.
Ty shook himself free and looked away sharply. His heart was racing and his skin burned. But why? Why did he feel so upset? He had no business prying into his sisters love life, and he knew that no matter what, Livvy could take care of herself. He tried to examine his feelings but as usual their was nothing concrete, nothing definable.
Just pain. It made no sense.
"Livvy! Ty! Kit!" He heard Diana's voice calling them. "All of you, get back here now! I need your help!"
Ty shook off whatever he was feeling and climbed down the cliffside.
Kit seemed nervous when he saw him, almost as if he was hiding something. Was he ashamed about kissing Livvy? It didn't make any sense. Ty ignored them both and neither of them seemed to notice or care.
In their defense that was often typical behavior for him. He changed his music from his usual calming soft music to a song with more of a sad dramatic feel by a band called Daughter.
Livvy fell into her usual spot beside him as they walked and for some reason Ty felt mildly irritated by it.
He had been doing an excellent job of compartmentalizing throughout the day and keeping his mind off of the kiss. But their was still this undercurrent of pain, especially when he spoke with Kit. He had been trying not to seem angry with Livvy but he could still feel annoyance bubbling to the surface. He wasn't sure if she could tell or not, but it still made him feel guilty.
When Julian and the others finally got back they had brought Kieran with them and Mark was being.. strange around him. Not his usual oddness but more tense? Sad? Ty couldn't tell. It was intriguing. He found himself watching the way he behaved around Kieran all day.
Later on, in the evening when things had become less hectic he sought Mark out to speak with him. Ty wasn't exactly sure why, but he felt compelled to.
"What's on your mind Tiberius?" He asked, once Ty had followed him to the kitchen.
What's on your mind? It was such a strange expression. It always made him think of living thoughts standing and running around on top of his brain, bouncing off the squishy matter.
"I was just wondering," Ty fiddled with the strings of his hoodie. "What does love feel like?"
Ty wasn't even attempting to make eye contact, or anything remotely close to it because it was Mark and he understood. But he could image his expression was probably quite confused.
"Well," Mark shuffled back and forth slightly on his feet. "It can feel like a lot of different things in my experience."
Ty looked up at him. "Well that isn't very helpful," he informed him. Mark laughed, which was confusing because he didn't think he had said anything particularly funny.
"You are absolutely right Ty, I'm sorry." He paused. "It can be-"
"Painful," Ty interrupted him.
Mark looked stunned, and then resigned. "Yes it can be painful. It can also be beautiful and filled with joy. It can be fun and hilarious. It can be maddening. "
"What do you feel with Kieran?" Ty asked. He knew he may be overstepping a boundary but quite frankly he didn't care.
Mark sighed, running his hand through his, now short again blond hair. "I've felt everything," he muttered. "I've been so enamored with him I thought I would die. I've been so furious with him I wanted to kill him, to rip him to pieces. I've.." he trailed off. "Felt other things that I shouldn't be telling you about because you are too young and my brother."
Ty rolled his eyes. "I'm not a child Mark. I don't need to be coddled."
"It is not about coddling you," he said firmly. "There are some things I just shouldn't tell you. Anyways, why do you ask?"
Ty shrugged. "I'm just curious." And in a way that was the truth. But not the full truth.
He wished he could ask Mark why he could feel Kit inside of him wherever he went. Slithering around his internal organs and making a home for himself inside Ty's veins. It wasn't fair. He never asked for this.
"Is there anything else you need?" Mark asked.
Make it stop. Just make it stop.
"No," Ty lied, instantly feeling guilty.
Because the truth was, if he really examined how he was feeling. He would be forced to confront the fact that there was something he needed, desperately in fact.
He needed Kit.