Work Text:
Hermione took a long pull of red wine and scanned the room over the rim of her glass; Hogwarts' Great Hall was crowded with people who had gathered to celebrate ten years of peace in the magical community. She had seen some of the people before at other events such as this, some people she knew so well she considered them family and others were complete strangers. She hadn't wanted to come tonight, as soon as the invite had arrived she had sent the RSVP back saying that she would not be attending. She felt like she had paid her dues; she had spent ten years attending anniversary meals at the Ministry, doing interviews with 'The Daily Prophet', being featured in photoshoots for 'Witch Weekly' and speaking at conventions across to world. When was she allowed to stop being a war hero and begin being Hermione Granger again?
Ginny, Harry and Ron had not been impressed when she had told them she didn't intend to come tonight and had launched operation 'get her out of the house at all cost'. Hermione had never been one to give in to peer-pressure but she knew deep down that they were right and that getting out of the house was probably a good idea. To help her forget why she had started to hide away in the first place and to help her to move on from the thing that made her feel like she was constantly treading water. She felt someone nudge her arm and she looked up to see Ginny and Andromeda looking at her expectantly.
"Oh sorry." Hermione apologised quickly, realising one of them had spoken to her or asked her something that she hadn't heard. "I was lost in thought for a moment there."
"It's ok, love." Andromeda reassured and reached out to squeeze her arm in understanding, they all found these kinds of events difficult. It was important to celebrate but it was also a painful reminder of what they had all lost in order to secure the peace they were enjoying.
"Andie just asked you how your case at work was going?" Ginny prompted, taking a swig of her champagne and sending her a look that silently asked if she was really ok.
"It has stalled a little bit actually." Hermione answered and nodded subtly at Ginny. "It seemed to barrel ahead like a freight train to begin with but now I have the suspects, who I know are guilty, and not enough evidence to sanction charging them. It’s very frustrating."
A tray floated past and Ginny swapped out her empty champagne flute for a freshly charged one. "Which case is this again?"
"I am investing a group that have been brewing and selling counterfeit healing potions." Hermione explained as she drained the contents of her wine glass. "They are packaging it up as branded potions and selling it to suppliers but it is ineffective at best and dangerous at worst. The ingredients they are using are unregulated and unapproved for use in the UK."
Ginny nodded as the specifics of it all came back to her, Harry had been involved in some of the surveillance missions and had mentioned some bits and pieces to her. "Is this the case you were working on with Narcissa?"
Hearing her name made Hermione's heart pound painfully in her chest, she'd tried to close the door on her feelings for Narcissa a million time but it doesn't ever stay shut. Just the mention of her was enough to make the wood splinter and threaten to let the cascade of feelings free, she could break, it never takes much. "Yes, she was reverse engineering the potions to help me establish which were genuine and which were counterfeit."
Andromeda gave her a knowing look; a mixture of sympathy and sadness. "She's back from Peru you know?"
"I didn't actually." Hermione replied tightly because why would she know? They didn't talk anymore, they didn't share a bed anymore, Narcissa’s voice didn't echo through her head anymore.
"Lucky cow." Ginny grumbled good-naturedly as she snagged Hermione another glass of wine. "I wish I could spend a year traveling around Peru looking for rare potion ingredients."
"She's coming tonight." Andromeda said carefully, her gaze never leaving Hermione. "She said she would be late. Fashionably so...of course."
Immediately Hermione's eyes began scanning the room for that tell-tale flash of blonde hair but she knew that Narcissa hadn't arrived, even after all this time she would have sensed her magic if she was here. She desperately wanted to go home so that all of the hard work that she had put into getting over her didn't come undone; it had taken her so long to find even this tenuous composure. She knew that all it would take was seeing Narcissa’s face and she would forget all of the reasons why she had decided that they were not a good idea.
"Hermione, are you ok?" Ginny cut across Hermione's thoughts, a look of concern painting her features. "You look a little pale."
"Ye...yeah I'm fine." Hermione stuttered, she tried to smile but she knew that it wasn't the least bit convincing. "I just think the wine has gone to my head."
Ginny wordlessly passed her glass to Andromeda and cupped Hermione's face between her hands. Her eyes danced across her features looking for the lie, looking for what had really thrown her. She sighed as she released her from her grasp knowing that Hermione was going to keep hiding the thing she had been hiding for a long time now. "I'll go and get you some water."
Hermione looked across the room again, guilt bubbling up inside her at all of the things she had kept from her friend. "Thanks Gin."
"Narcissa will respect your boundaries." Andromeda spoke once Ginny was out of earshot; she paused to give Hermione a moment to catch up. "If you're going to talk this evening she will let you approach her."
Hermione took a deep breath and swirled the wine in her glass, watching the ruby liquid run down the sides and settle again. "She told you about us."
Andromeda nodded slowly, assessing the weight of accusation in Hermione's statement. "She was heartbroken when you ended things."
"I know." Hermione conceded, she had spent days after ending things with Narcissa questioning her decision. She'd ended it because she was scared, scared of the depths of the things she was feeling and how what she wanted was in total juxtaposition with the future she could see for them. When she had lay in bed feeling like she had a ragged bleeding hole in her chest while reading the letter Narcissa had written begging her to give them another chance she had wondered if she had loved her. But she knew she had never let herself take that final leap and it all cycled back to her fear. A deep rooted fear that they would try to build an existence for themselves but it would all come crashing down around them just like everything else in her life had. She had finally got to a point where she realised that the constant pain of Narcissa’s absence was far worse than her worry over a future loss that may never happen when she learned that Narcissa was gone. Hermione sighed deeply, as always when thinking about her she was in danger of getting herself stuck in her head again. "She ran off to Peru."
"She ran away from you." Andromeda corrected, there was no judgement in her comment just a gentle clarification of why Narcissa had really gone.
Hermione felt the air in the room change and heard how some voices began to hush, her head instantly snapped towards the door and there she was. Narcissa had arrived; she had walked in on the arm of Draco, he hadn't been seen at one of these events since Scorpius had been born and the news of Astoria's illness had been made public. He looked pale, stiff and uncomfortable while Narcissa looked radiant; her hair had grown while she was away and she wore it in tousled waves that fell around her shoulders. Her previously porcelain white skin was tanned and glowed in a way that can only be achieved by spending extended periods of time outdoors. Her body looked toned and she carried herself with a self-confidence that Hermione had never seen on her before, gone was the practiced poise of the pureblood and in its place was an assured sense of her as her own woman. Hermione could remember how when Narcissa used to walk into a restaurant and approach their table or when she would pull her front door open to find her on her door step she would feel like her world stood still for just a second. As she looked at her now she had exactly the same feeling again, like everything around her was slowing down and Narcissa was the only thing in the world. She was hit with the reality that the blonde woman would always have this impact on her no matter how much she tried to convince herself she had moved on. Narcissa led Draco towards the corner of the room, smiling at people as they passed and waving to a few who greeted her and then they were gone behind the crowds.
"Peru looks good on her doesn't it?" Andromeda asked with a chuckle, noticing how Hermione's eyes still scanned the spot she had last seen Narcissa.
Hermione shook her head lightly before downing the contents of her wine glass in one mouthful. "Yes, she looks..."
"She isn't the same as when she left." Andromeda supplied as Hermione's speech paused and it was clear she wasn't about to finish her thought. "She is less unsure of her place in the world since she got back. It has done her good to achieve something on her own, to have gained some recognition on her own merit."
Hermione nodded, a feeling of pride welling up in her chest at the thought of Narcissa achieving one of those whispered dreams from their 3 am conversations. "She completed her potions mastery while she was away."
"You were keeping tabs on her." Andromeda stated, not giving Hermione space to even consider denying it. "I thought the two of you were over?"
"We are." Hermione said firmly, she could feel the heat of embarrassment blaze across her cheeks at walking straight into that silly confession. "I needed to know she was safe out there in Peru."
The corner of Andromeda's lip quirked up in the beginnings of a smirk before she got herself back under control. "And if she hadn't have been safe?"
Hermione contemplated lying and telling the woman that she would have done nothing, that her inquests into Narcissa’s life while she was away were just to assuage her curiosity. But what was the point? It was clear Andromeda saw straight through her anyway. "I would have got the next port key out there and found her."
Andromeda laughed not unkindly as she fixed Hermione with a look. "That doesn't sound very over to me."
"Sorry it took me so long." Ginny announced her abrupt reappearance breathlessly, she handed Hermione a glass of ice water. "You can't move in this place without having to speak to at least ten people."
Andromeda cleared her throat and dragged her gaze away from Hermione; she fixed her face into a more relaxed expression as she addressed Ginny. "Narcissa has arrived. I better go and greet her, we don't want any articles in the Prophet about a feud now do we?"
Ginny snorted and rolled her eyes at Andromeda's mocking comment, they were all aware that their actions were always under the microscope at events like this. "We'll catch up with you in a little while Andie."
"See you later ladies." Andromeda handed Ginny her champagne flute back and gave them both a little wave as she disappeared amongst the other parties.
Ginny watched as Hermione took a few mouthfuls of the cool water she had brought her; she still didn't look herself though, she looked distracted. "Are you sure you're ok?"
"I don't know." Hermione muttered. She couldn't believe that in a room as full of people as this she could feel Narcissa’s presence as if she was stood right behind her, her magic tickling at the edges of her mind. She knew that she should go home and leave Narcissa alone, she should quit while she was ahead. There was something in the back of her head telling her that if she stayed here she would say something to her that she would live to regret. She didn't want to find herself in the morning sending an owl saying sorry for the things she said because there was no way that Narcissa could still feel anything for her after all of this time. "I should probably go home and go to bed."
"Absolutely, you've done your bit now." Ginny agreed giving Hermione an encouraging look, she felt a little guilty that she had essentially forced her to come tonight when she clearly didn't want to. "You've shown your face and smiled for the cameras."
Before Hermione could reply she saw Harry and Ron approaching them from over Ginny's shoulder, Harry smiled warmly at them as he settled in next to his wife. "Hello ladies."
"Ladies is a stretch don't you think?" Ron mocked as he came to a stop next to Hermione, winking playfully at her to let her know his remark was a jab at his sister not her.
"Shut up Ron." Ginny snapped as she accepted the kiss that Harry pressed to her cheek. "Where have you two been?"
"Chatting to Neville and Seamus about Quidditch." Harry answered.
"Of course." Ginny rolled her eyes, of course they had been talking Quidditch with their mates while in a room full of wizarding Britain's best and brightest. "Hermione's about to head home, she doesn't feel very well."
Ron nudged Hermione's arm and gestured with his head to the empty wine glass she still held in her grasp. "Never could handle your wine, ey ‘Mione?"
"Are you bringing up your engagement party again?" Ginny groaned, shooting Ron an exasperated look.
Hermione laughed lightly, her mood lifting significantly now that she was surrounded by her friend's and their easy back and forth. "Throw up once when you're twenty one and you never live it down."
Ginny shoved Ron's shoulder roughly causing him to stagger backwards a step and frown at his sister. "No wonder she drank so much, she was in mourning over being stupid enough to say she would marry you."
"That's a bit harsh Gin." Harry attempted, seeing the slightly crestfallen look on Ron's face.
"Thank Merlin she saw sense before it was too late." Ginny continued, not having picked up on the not so subtle hint from her husband.
"If I hadn't figured out I preferred women I would have married you in a heartbeat Ron." Hermione stepped in, she looped her arm through Ron's and squeezed his bicep. "You're a good man."
Ron covered Hermione's hand with his own and smiled at her gratefully. "Thanks ‘Mione."
Harry cleared his throat a little awkwardly and shot Hermione an apologetic look. "Before you go Hermione, I think it would be a good idea to say hello to Draco."
Hermione rolled her eyes at the coded suggestion, they always had to keep up appearances. "For the papers?"
"Partly." Harry shrugged, his eyes drifted over to where Draco and Narcissa stood talking to Kingsley, Andromeda and Minerva. "But for him too, it must have taken a lot for him to leave Scorpius and Astoria at home."
"You're right." Hermione sighed, she really didn't want to go and talk to Draco and Narcissa. Right now she felt strong enough to disappear into the night and forget about this evening all together, once she had spoken to Narcissa and looked into her eyes she wouldn't have to self-control to walk away. "Should we go now?"
"Yeah." Ron agreed, turning him and Hermione around so that they were facing Draco and Narcissa. "Better get talking to that git over and done with quickly."
"He's not that much of a git anymore Ronald." Hermione said lightly, she knew that Ron found it the most difficult out of all of them to move on with Draco because he never could truly forgive him for the things he had said to her while they were at school.
"You're too kind to him." Ron grumbled as they began picking their way between the crowds of people that separated them from their destination.
Hermione took a shuddery breath as they moved passed the last group and all of sudden, too suddenly, they were in front of them. Like a magnet being drawn to its opposite pole Narcissa’s eyes drifted to her, if she didn't know her so well she never would have recognised the apprehension in their blue depths.
Quite without thought Narcissa stepped forward, disregarding the fact that Minerva had been in the middle of offering her the position of potions master at Hogwarts. All her mind had space for was registering the surprise that Hermione had approached her, she had expected her to avoid her all evening but here she was stood in front of her looking so adorably uncertain. She wanted to grab her, to wrap her in her arms and never let go; she wanted to apologise for leaving and not writing, she wanted to say sorry for sending that ridiculously pathetic letter just before leaving. But the only thing that came out of her mouth was a quite word, whispered like a soft prayer. "Hermione..."
Hermione felt a shiver run down her spine as Narcissa's gaze held hers and the breathy sigh that contained her name reached her ears, her arm fell away from Ron's and for just a moment it was as though they were the only two people in the whole universe. Here now, stood two feet apart, Narcissa’s magic cascaded over her skin like monsoon rains, her perfume filled her senses and the excitement of her presence prickled through her nerves. And she knew that no matter how many times she had told herself that she couldn’t, she wouldn't, she won't go falling for Narcissa again it just wasn't true because she would always, always give in to her. "Hello Narcissa."
"I..." Narcissa began but whatever she was about to say fled from her mind as the reality of Hermione standing in front of her really sunk in. She was more beautiful than she ever remembered with her hair in loose curls that she had pulled across one shoulder and wearing a perfectly tailored maroon suit with no blouse underneath. The well-judged amount of skin showing at her chest and the high heels she had paired the outfit with made her look feminine and sexy while the slightly oversized shoulder pads gave her a powerful air. She drew the breath from Narcissa’s lungs; just like she always had, just like she always would. She could try to fight the way her body reacted to Hermione but she would always lose, so she just tucked a lock of hair behind her ear self-consciously and looked down.
As Narcissa moved Hermione caught sight of a mark across her wrist and without much conscious choice she grabbed hold of her hand and pulled her arm towards her. She pushed the fabric of her sleeve up carefully to reveal a small tattoo that most certainly had not been there when she had last seen her; it looked like an ancient symbol or a rune that she couldn’t identify. She frowned at it curiously before she came back to her senses and realised she was cradling Narcissa’s arm between her hands in the middle of a crowded room and in front of the British press. "Sorry I just...you got a tattoo?"
"It was very spur of the moment, I'm not sure I really had much of a say in it." Narcissa chuckled a little breathlessly, every nerve ending in her body hyper aware that Hermione was still touching her. "I was introduced to a shaman, his people claimed he was 300 years old. I brought him some potion ingredients that he couldn’t source in the jungle and in turn he gave me this tattoo. It was given to me to remind me to have faith in my decisions because that’s what the shaman sensed that I was missing."
Hermione looked back up at Narcissa and smiled at her softly, it sounded like she'd had to most incredible experiences over her year in Peru. She had come so far from the woman who would not leave her house because she was too scared about what people would say or what they might do. Now she was trekking into the Peruvian Amazon, meeting 300 year old Shaman and getting tattoos. She looked back at the symbol on her wrist and ran her thumb across it gently, she gasped as the black ink rippled an electric blue under her touch and Narcissa snatched her arm away. "What was that?"
Narcissa's body felt cold now that Hermione wasn't holding her wrist anymore, the sudden loss of contact made her feel off kilter. She had spent the last year trying to forget her touch, trying to lose herself in the affections of others but somehow it had just made her miss it twice as much. "It...it does that when I come across something I should pursue."
"Oh." Hermione breathed as her eyes locked with Narcissa’s, she wanted nothing more than to be something that she should pursue. When Narcissa had left she was sure that she had messed everything up, that she had lost her chance to be with her. She dare not let herself hope that the fluttering of a tattoo meant that Narcissa had not yet given up on her.
Draco appeared at Hermione's shoulder and smiled at her stiffly. "Granger, I see you were admiring my mother's new ink."
Hermione laughed a little unsteadily as she realised that the others in their group had put some distance between her and Narcissa without her notice leaving them in the corner alone, she suspected it was Andromeda's doing. "Yes I...it’s very..."
"Unexpected." Draco supplied as he raised a sarcastic eyebrow at his mother who simply rolled her eyes at his remark. "A bit of a mid-life crisis moment if you ask me."
Hermione's eyes flicked to Narcissa again, she knew she wasn't having any sort of mid-life crisis she was just discovering who she was. Who she really was without the pressures of pureblood society or the expectations of being a perfect Slytherin or Voldemort breathing down the back of her neck. But she wasn't about to say any of that to Draco and have him questioning why she thought she was an expert on his mother's psyche all of a sudden. "She could have done worse than get a tattoo I suppose."
Draco snorted and sipped at his tumbler of whiskey. "Yes, I half expect a Peruvian toy boy to turn up at the door any day now."
Narcissa watched as Hermione swallowed thickly, knowing she probably had the same question as she did fluttering around in the back of her mind. Is there somebody else? A year was a long time and they both had a lot to offer a partner, it was not beyond the realm of possibilities that one of them had found another. But she herself hadn't, she had been far too busy to think about pursuing anything more than casual encounters while in Peru for one and secondly she knew no one would compare to Hermione. "You can rest assured no lovers will be following me home."
"I should bloody well hope not." Draco grumbled and quickly finished his drink. "Anyway, I came over to wish you goodnight Granger because I am going to head home and to ask you what you planned to do, mother."
Narcissa caught Hermione's eye, wordless asking her what she should do. She had only come this evening to catch a glimpse of Hermione but having her here in front of her, talking to her, was more than she could have wished for. Hermione nodded to her subtly telling her to stay, that she wanted her to stay. "I think I will stay here a little longer, darling. I have only just arrived and there are many conversations I think I should have."
Draco gave his mother one stiff nod before snapping his head towards Hermione. "Granger, I will leave her in your capable hands then, make sure you escort her home will you?"
"Of course, Draco." Hermione almost stammered, she felt her cheeks beginning to blaze and she wasn't completely sure why she had reacted to his comment the way that she had. "I will make sure I get her home safely."
"If I could interject." Narcissa drawled as she raised an eyebrow at her companions. "I am more than capable of getting myself home without assistance."
"Is a son not allowed to worry about his mother?" Draco asked rhetorically as he reached out to squeeze his mother's forearm reassuringly. "That and Astoria would kill me if I hadn't ensured you were to be taken care of this evening."
Narcissa chuckled lowly in her throat and noticed how Hermione shifted slightly, no one else would have noticed her reaction but she did. "Well you can assure Astoria that I am sure Hermione will take very good care of me this evening."
"Good, well good evening mother." Draco nodded again before levelling Hermione with a look that told her it was time for their practiced performance. She smiled at him subtly as he leant in and kissed her on both cheeks. "Granger, it has been a pleasure. Perhaps we can catch up sometime when there are fewer eyes upon us."
"I would enjoy that Draco." Hermione said genuinely, they had made a point over the years of meeting up once or twice a year someplace relatively conspicuous where the press were bound to find them. It had been a suggestion from Kingsley who said it would show a unity between both sides, highlighting that if a former Death Eater and the Golden Girl could get along then anyone could. They had been reluctant to begin with, then they had begrudgingly begun to find an ironic humour in their meetings and now there were moments when they genuinely enjoyed the other’s company. "Send me an owl and I will see where I can schedule something in for us."
"Good evening, darling." Narcissa smiled as she watched Draco disappear, she knew he would not stay long but she was glad he had pushed himself to come. She waited to make sure that he made it through the floo without any trouble before she turned to Hermione, all of a sudden feeling a little awkward. "Do not feel like you must spend your evening with me now just because you have made a promise to Draco."
"It's ok, your company is tolerable." Hermione mocked, she had picked up on the change in Narcissa’s temperature. She had thought that she didn't really want to speak to Narcissa again, that it would be too painful, but now she felt empty at the thought of walking away from her. "Plus you need to tell me about Peru. Andromeda mentioned you had completed your mastery while you were out there."
"Peru was incredible Hermione, it was everything I hoped it would be and more." Narcissa seemed to light up when she spoke, she had only seen her like this before when she spoke of potions. It had always been her escape from the monotony of pureblood life, but now she was alive like that over something else and it made Hermione's heart swell with something she couldn't identify. "The mountains are so beautiful, they make you feel so tiny and insignificant, the water at the beaches is so blue you can hardly believe that it is real and the forests are teeming with life, creatures that I thought only existed in fables leap from tree to tree. I cannot believe that I have spent so much of my life naive to the wonders of the magical world outside of this tiny island. I thought the world began and ended at our shores but there is so much more, if I had known as a child what was out there I...well I don't know what I would have done. But I am glad that I know now."
"I'm so pleased for you Cissa." Hermione beamed, she couldn't help it because Narcissa’s excited joy was contagious. She could imagine her stood in a mountain valley with her arms held wide feeling the kiss of the wind or on a beach with the warm waves lapping at her ankles. She couldn't help but wish that she had been there to see Narcissa fall in love with Peru. "You seem so much more alive now, it feels like you have discovered something within yourself."
"I think it was exactly what I needed." Narcissa agreed, she looked at Hermione and she noticed the tinge of sadness at the edges of her expression. She knew her well so she knew what Hermione was thinking, she was thinking that without her and their relationship she had been free to go to Peru and have these experiences. And in a way she was right, she never would have been able to drag herself to Peru and leave Hermione for a year if they had been together but she was sure they could have worked something out. Instead she had gladly fled to Peru, running away because she had nothing left here once Hermione had walked away from her. "I just wish that I could have left under better circumstances."
"I know." Hermione sighed, Andromeda's words from earlier in the evening rattled around in her head... 'she ran away from you.' She had always known it was true but to hear it said by someone other than the voice in her head hit home in a very different way. She knew she had hurt Narcissa when she ended things she'd seen it in the tears she shed as she felt it as she had Apparated away leaving her sobbing on her knees in the middle of her bedroom. She had never been someone who second guessed her decisions once she had make them but this one...this one was different. "I'm sorry Narcissa. I'm sorry for hurting you the way that I did, it was never my intention. I got scared over the intensity of us and caught up in my head thinking about our future, I should have dealt with everything better."
"I'm not sorry Hermione. Yes it hurt to lose you in a way I had never comprehended I could be hurt." Narcissa said carefully, a sad smile slipping on to her face as she subtly let the backs of her fingers brush against Hermione's. "But I never would have gone and had these amazing experiences if you had not ended things when you did. I had to lose everything to realise what I was really capable of."
Hermione felt her breath catch in her throat both at Narcissa’s admission and the gentle touch of her skin against hers. "You felt like you lost everything?"
Narcissa laughed out a breathy little sound through her nose; she had been so in love with Hermione before she had ended things, if she was very honest she still was. She had thought that she had loved Lucius when she was younger but as time had gone on she had realised that she had only been infatuated with him; with the idea of the life she could have with him and with the knowledge that she would become a mother like she had always dreamed to be. But she had loved Hermione wholly and completely even though she knew the other woman hadn't let herself fall the way she had. Despite the hurt and the heartache she didn't regret a second she had spent with Hermione. "I think you and I were in very different places when you ended things."
Hermione had never heard Narcissa admit the depth of her feelings for her out loud, she didn't have to because she could see it in the way she looked at her. It hadn't taken any great contemplations over the course of the year for her to figure it out, she'd known how badly she would hurt Narcissa before she even begun the conversation to end things. She had been so stupid, it was her biggest regret. "I'm so sorry."
Narcissa sighed and looked around quickly before she grabbed Hermione's hand and pulled her further into the corner of the room, she swept a hanging tapestry aside and led them into a hidden passageway. "Hermione, what do you think about when you think of me?"
Hermione frowned, her equilibrium felt off, that was not the remark she had been expecting from Narcissa. "What do you mean?"
Narcissa smiled softly, registering that she was still holding Hermione's hand but refusing to let go. She let the pad of her thumb rub over the back of her knuckles feeling the little battle scars that she used to know by heart. "When it's late at night, when you can't sleep and you're still wide awake and your mind drifts to me what do you think about?"
Hermione swallowed thickly and looked away from Narcissa’s sapphire stare, she knew the answer to this; regret, guilt, grief, longing...love. "I...I don't know."
"I will tell you what I think about. It doesn't matter if I am with friends and somebody says your name or I'm thinking about you when I am lonely at night. All I think are good things." Narcissa's voice caught in her throat and she felt a gentle tear slip passed her lashes, Hermione looked up again and twitched as if she was about to move to catch the tear but stopped abruptly. Narcissa reached out and took Hermione's other hand in hers, squeezing them and holding them tightly; feeling her solid presence ground her in this moment that she'd thought only this morning would be nothing more than a fantasy. "I hope that when you think of me you think good things too."
"I do." Hermione breathed, surprised by the emotion that was present in her own voice. It was a reflexive answer but it was true; all of the regret and longing came from the knowledge that she had given up something incredible and beautiful when she had let Narcissa go. "I think about when we left that coffee shop in Soho and the streets were busy so I reached for your hand for the first time. I felt like every part of me was shaking, I was waiting for you to pull away but instead you tangled our fingers together and pulled me closer to you."
"I wanted you to kiss me so badly that evening." Narcissa chuckled as she pulled Hermione just a bit nearer. "We were in that little pub and the theatres had just let out, it got so busy and we were forced to huddle together against the bar. I could smell your perfume, feel the heat from your body, I saw the way you were looking at me and all I wanted was for you to lean forward and kiss me."
"I..I didn't know you wanted me to kiss you then." Hermione stuttered as her eyes dropped to red painted lips and lingered there. "I have never quite been able to believe that someone like you could want to kiss me."
"I think about kissing you all of the time, it is so cliché to say but with you there genuinely were fireworks." Narcissa cringed inwardly at her ridiculous comment. "No one before you or since you has ever made me feel the way that kissing you did."
Hermione's chest tightened at the thought of Narcissa kissing someone else, she'd said 'since you'...had she been kissing someone in Peru? She had assured Draco earlier that no lovers would be following her home but that didn't mean that there hadn't been any while she was away. She was being a hypocrite to feel jealous about it, she had slept with her fair share of women over the past year. But she had to agree with Narcissa; no one had compared, no one had even come close. Hermione's mind was pulled back to all of the moments they had got lost in each other; she thought about the first time when they had parked up in her car at Brighton beach to watch the sunset. She'd felt so nervous all evening because she could feel the moment building, the air was thick with the anticipation of it. They'd climbed into the back seat to get more comfortable and Narcissa had looked so beautiful with her hair down and the pinks and oranges of the summer sky painting patterns on her face that she hadn't been able to stop herself. She'd kissed Narcissa like she was the only source of oxygen in the entire universe, desperately and deeply and with a yearning to be satisfied in a way she knew only she could provide. When she found herself straddling Narcissa’s hips, her body bent over her and her head brushing the roof of the car she'd felt a delicate hand on her chest and a gentle suggestion that maybe they should pause before they went too far. She couldn't live knowing someone else was seeing Narcissa that way. "I don't want anybody else to kiss you."
Narcissa’s mind screeched to a halt at Hermione's quiet admission, she couldn't compose a coherent thought. In her wildest fantasies about her reunion with Hermione she had never imagined that she would admit any modicum of feelings for her and although it hadn't been an out and out confession she would take it. She let go of one of Hermione's hands to reach out and rub a lock of her hair between her thumb and forefinger. "I remember sitting in the front yard of your first house on that rickety bench pointing out the constellations to you and telling you about my family. You amazed me that night; you were so interested in them, you put aside all of the darkness they have brought to the world and accepted them as part of what make me who I am. I had never known such compassion until I got to know you."
Hermione shuddered as she felt Narcissa’s knuckles brush against the bare skin at her collarbone accidentally and suddenly it was as if every nerve ending in her body was on high alert. There was only one way she would be satisfied with this evening ending. She stepped closer to Narcissa and dropped her other hand in favour of circling her waist, she gave her a moment to move away but of course she didn't. "I never should have let you go. I wish I hadn't been so scared I..."
"Shhh...Hermione, it's ok." Narcissa cooed as she cupped Hermione's cheek, running her thumb over the soft skin there. "We're here now and that is all that matters. We both had some lessons to learn; we were not complete, we weren't ready."
"I think that we are now." Hermione whispered as she leant her face into Narcissa’s caress, her eyes slipping closed at the delicate beauty of her touch.
"I do too." Narcissa breathed, she used her hold on Hermione's face to draw their mouths together into an unhurried, languid kiss. Their lips moved against each other in a long practiced dance, Narcissa felt Hermione fist the material of her dress as she slipped her hand into her hair. Their bodies pulled closer together, pressing up against each other like they were the separate soul mates of Greek mythology desperately trying to fuse themselves back into one being.
Hermione surged forward and forced Narcissa to take a step backwards, her back hitting the wall behind as she quickly followed to pin her there. She slipped her tongue into her mouth; the entrance quickly greeted with a little flick from Narcissa’s tongue before it retreated but they soon found each other again, rolling together, caressing, pressing against each other. Narcissa had been right, nothing felt like it did when they kissed each other but she wanted more...needed more and she wasn't going to get that in some damp passageway in Hogwarts. She slowed the kiss down and moved away from Narcissa’s mouth, nipping at her bottom lip as she did. They pressed their foreheads together and panted into the tiny space between them, trying to catch their breath.
"Hermione..." Narcissa spoke still breathless, she let her lips brush against Hermione's in a tender touch. "I do believe you promised to take me home and take care of me."
"I did." Hermione smirked a little as she let the tip of her nose skirt across Narcissa’s cheek and along her jaw before nestling behind her ear. She let her lips stroke the shell of her ear before she whispered. "Would you like to go home now Narcissa?"
Narcissa nodded as she fought to contain the groan that threatened to rumble free from her chest. "Yes, I would."
Hermione reluctantly stepped away from the heat of Narcissa body, she slipped her hand down her arm to entwine their fingers. She began to try and tow her in the direction of the tapestry they had entered through but Narcissa pulled her to a stop. She turned to look at her in confusion but she just smiled at her softly.
"I know another way." Narcissa revealed as she took the lead in pulling them through the passageway in the opposite direction to the party. The passage narrowed and lowered to the point that they had to walk one behind the other and stoop down so as not to get caught on the rocky walls or roof.
Hermione couldn't imagine how the space could get any tighter when they came to a halt, her eyes scanned the gloom but all she saw ahead of Narcissa was a solid rock wall. "It’s a dead end?"
"No, it's a secret passage." Narcissa pressed her hand to the stone in front of her, for a moment nothing happened but then with a grinding that set their teeth on edge the wall began to slide away.
Hermione looked down at the steep staircase in front of them and then at Narcissa who was grinning at her. "But I've never seen it before."
Narcissa laughed as she slipped through the hole in the wall and carefully made her way on to the second step, she reached back to help Hermione through. "It wouldn't be much of a secret if everyone knew about it now would it?"
Hermione slipped her wand out of her sleeve and cast a wordless Lumos so that they could navigate the stairs without falling. Once she had a firm grip on her wand she reached out to entwine her fingers with Narcissa and they began their descent. "It wasn't on the Marauder's Map."
Narcissa rolled her eyes, not that Hermione would see, the hero worship of those four nuisances was always a point of irritation for her. "Despite what my cousin and his friends might have believed, they didn't know all of Hogwarts' secrets."
As they stepped off that last stair Hermione looked around her, the walls were coated in green algae and there was the distinct smell of damp in the air. "Are we under the Black Lake?"
"Yes, this passage is a well-kept Slytherin secret." Narcissa answered as she pulled Hermione a little closer towards her so that their arms brushed each other's sides as they walked. "It will bring us out at Hogsmeade station."
They walked for a little distance and Hermione noticed the passage had begun to slope upwards, a sign that they were probably reaching the end. "You know it would have been quicker to just use the floo in the Great Hall?"
"And how would we have explained to people why we had disappeared for ten minutes and then were all of a sudden flooing home together?" Narcissa pointed out, Hermione's little impatient streak sent a shiver of excitement down her spine. They had waited a year to be reunited, she could only imagine what was in store for her when they got home. "The press would have had a field day."
"That’s true." Hermione grumbled, she just wanted to be kissing Narcissa again and if they had managed to floo home she would already have her naked and begging by now.
Narcissa laughed and squeezed Hermione's fingers between her own. "Besides, where is your sense of adventure Hermione?"
Hermione shook her head but she could feel the smile tugging at the corner of her lip because this all felt so normal; their back and forth, their easy laughter, their inherent understanding of each other. No matter what distance they tried to put between them, they would always be drawn back to this. So why even bother to try and fight it? "I think I will have more of a sense of adventure once I have you at home."
Narcissa made a sound of surprise. "Learnt some new tricks have you?"
"You'll have to wait and see." Hermione mocked, her eyes catching sight of the night sky ahead of them as they neared the end of the tunnel. A few more feet and they were out in the open, Hogsmeade station a little way ahead of them. She looked behind to try and see where they had emerged from but all she saw was an overgrown hedgerow.
Narcissa stepped in front of Hermione and took her other hand too. "Your place or mine?"
Hermione smiled at Narcissa in the darkness of the evening. "I bought a new house while you were away."
Narcissa brought Hermione's hands up and kissed slowly across her knuckles. "Take us there, I'd love to see it."
Hermione pulled Narcissa close and slipped her arm around her waist, they turned on the spot and with a quiet pop they Apparated into her kitchen. With a little bit of wordless magic she lit the under cabinet lighting, filling the room with a soft glow. She stepped away from Narcissa and gestured to the room. "So this is the kitchen."
Narcissa looked around at the large open room with an island in the middle. "It's a lovely space for entertaining."
"And the dining area is just through there." Hermione pointed through to the conservatory attached to the back of the kitchen, Narcissa smirked as she peered through and nodded. "The...erm..."
Narcissa reached out and cupped Hermione's cheek, effectively interrupting whatever she was about to say next. "Hermione, perhaps the tour can wait for the morning."
"Oh, that's a shame." Hermione smirked as she turned her face to kiss Narcissa’s palm, her lips drifting to the tattoo on her wrist. She let her tongue lathe over the mark, moving away slightly to watch it ripple blue again. She looked back up at Narcissa from under her lashes. "The next place I was going to show you was the bedroom."
Narcissa laughed and pulled Hermione to her, their lips crashed roughly and their teeth clashed together. Her hand went into previously neat and tidy hair, tugging at it harshly and making Hermione hiss at the sting in her scalp. She forced their hips together and began pushing Hermione across the room until her back slammed into a closed door.
Hermione let go of her grip on Narcissa hip to fumble with the handle of the door. Finally she got it unlatched and the door swung open behind her, they stumbled through as the door banged into the wall so hard she was sure it would have done some damage. She used the change in balance to force Narcissa backwards, her back hitting the banister for the stairs so hard the air was forced from her lungs. Hermione kissed across Narcissa’s cheek and began nipping and sucking down the column of her throat and she raked her teeth over where she felt Narcissa’s pulse fluttering.
Narcissa smacked her head back against the wood behind her and screwed her eyes shut. She felt Hermione's hands drifting to the zip at the back of her dress and begin pulling it down slowly. The fabric slipped away from her shoulders and Hermione moved it with her chin so that she could kiss along her collarbone, her tongue dipping into her cleavage. Narcissa used her hold on Hermione's hair to drag her face away from her skin none too gently, she locked eyes with her. "Take me upstairs."
Hermione grabbed Narcissa’s hand and without saying a word took off down the corridor at a jog, she rounded the corner and began bounding up the stairs. She heard Narcissa chuckle low in her throat as she scampered behind trying to keep up with her. Hermione stopped in front of the second door on the right; she pushed the handle down and turned to face Narcissa. Swinging the door open behind her and took slow backward steps into the room; watching as Narcissa prowled after her, her dress hanging off her shoulder. "You are so fucking beautiful."
"Look who's talking." Narcissa husked as she reached around behind her back to unzip her dress the rest of the way and let it fall to pool at her feet. She approached Hermione wearing just her black lace bra and underwear, slowly she reached for the buttons on her blazer and flicked them open. She frowned when it stayed exactly where it was.
"I had to tape it to me to stop any inappropriate slips." Hermione chuckled, but the sound died in her throat as Narcissa harshly ripped the material away from her skin. The delicious sting soothed instantly as Narcissa leant forward and lathed her tongue over the pink marks causing Hermione to moan, a deep throaty thing.
Narcissa groaned in response to the sound, it echoed in some long untouched part of her. A part of her that had only ever been open to Hermione. "How I have missed hearing those noises."
"I have a feeling you will be hearing them a lot more tonight." Hermione countered a little breathlessly; she slipped a finger under Narcissa chin to draw her face back up to hers, her eyes were heavy with excitement and ecstasy as they held her own.
As Narcissa looked at Hermione she felt a pulse of magic that emanated from the rune inked into her skin wash over the two of them. She could tell that Hermione had felt it too by the shudder that ran through her body and the slight frown that pulled at her brow. As the magic settled she registered a different sensation in her body, at first she wasn't sure what had changed but as she leant in to kiss Hermione again she felt the charge of foreign arousal layered over her own. Excitement prickled through her body and she knew that Hermione felt it when she pulled her closer, pressing their barely clothed top halves together. "I can feel you everywhere, darling."
"What is that?" Hermione whispered. Her breath catching at the feeling of need somewhere deep inside her, in a place previously unexplored, it was a desperate commanding need and it wasn't her own. It felt like the look she had seen in Narcissa’s eyes when they had made love before, the one that always made her give in to her whispered requests. She could feel what Narcissa wanted from her and she wanted so badly to give it to her. "I can feel your desires."
"I think it's my tattoo, the rune." Narcissa said, a hint of wonder in her voice as she looked at her wrist and the tattoo that was now shimmering gold. "It has never done this before."
"Clearly I am something you should pursue." Hermione smirked as she flicked the button open on her dress pants and shimmied them over her hips so they fell to the floor. She could feel Narcissa restrain herself from rushing to her, could feel how much she wanted to see her laid out on the bed displayed for her. Narcissa always liked to be in control during sex, Hermione knew it was because she had spent so much of her life not having a choice so she wanted to exert that right now. She slipped her navy blue lace thong down, sat on the edge of her bed and let her legs fall open to give Narcissa the view she knew she was craving.
Narcissa’s eyes were instantly drawn to Hermione's glistening centre; usually she would fight to keep her poise, to not put pressure on the moment by moving too quickly. But now she could feel the longing coming from Hermione to have her closer, she moved across the room without another thought. She cupped Hermione's face between her hands and leant down to kiss her, her knee resting between her legs as she pressed forward sending them both falling on to the mattress. As soon as her weight was settled she felt Hermione's hands moving slowly up her waist and across her back to undo the clasp of her bra. She felt the fluttering of excitement come from Hermione at the anticipation of having their naked chests brushing together. She sat up so she could rid herself of her bra, tossing it aside, the second it was gone Hermione's hands were cupping her breasts.
Hermione enjoyed having the weight of Narcissa’s full breasts in her hands, she pulled her palms down lower and captured her nipples between her thumb and forefinger. For a second she just held them prisoner and then she pinched them firmly, twisting and tugging at them and she felt it herself the blissful sting that sent a shock wave to her core. She looked up into Narcissa’s blue eyes that were clouded with arousal. "I felt that too."
"I think we could have some fun with this." Narcissa panted as she let her hands wander across Hermione's shoulders slowly, stroking along her collarbones and between her breasts; her palms slipped around her slim ribs and just held her. There was no rush; now she could feel what Hermione felt she wanted to explore her, to imprint in her mind all of the places that made her feel good. She ran the tips of her nails down Hermione's waist and felt the tickle at her own sides, she bit her lip and drifted lower pinching the flesh at her hips and again feeling the shuddering of her muscles caused by a touch that wasn't really there. "Lie back on the bed properly."
Hermione narrowed her eyes at the demand but she could feel the exhilaration coming off Narcissa in waves so when she stood up from her lap she scooted backwards on to the bed and to lay back against the pillows. "Bossy."
Narcissa smirked, she didn't need to be able to sense Hermione's feelings to know that she loved it when she was bossy. "Close your eyes."
Hermione's eyes slipped shut, she could tell that Narcissa had a plan and she was more than a little intrigued to find out what it was. She felt the bed dip and sensed Narcissa settling between her spread legs, she tried to listen out for what her next move might be when she felt the echo of that same sharp pain in her nipples. Her eyes snapped open to see a smirking, very naked Narcissa knelt between her legs with her own breast in her hands. Narcissa tugged at her nipples again and Hermione's back arched off the bed attempting to press against hands that weren't really there.
"Did I tell you to open your eyes?" Narcissa chastised, pairing her words with a twist of her nipples that had both of them groaning.
Hermione rolled her eyes at the telling off but dutifully closed them, enjoying their little game but two of them could certainly play it. Hermione slid her hand across her stomach, she bent her right knee so that she opened herself up more; she felt Narcissa’s arousal spike at the sight she knew she was affording her. Her hand travelled lower over her mound and ghosted over her clit, she heard Narcissa gasp and felt heat bloom in the back of her mind. She chuckled as she moved away from her clit to trace the tips of fingers up and down the insides of her thighs.
"You are a naughty little minx." Narcissa growled at the heady mix of her own arousal slowly mixing with Hermione's passion. The show she was putting on should have been illegal, it was so sinfully delightful watching Hermione's fingers brush against her sex. She was enjoying watching her but she desperately wanted to be the one with her fingertips coated in Hermione's arousal. "You can feel how much I want you, can't you?"
"Yes." Hermione felt her hips jerk as her fingers danced over her clit and Narcissa’s want spiked in the back of her mind. She let her eyes flutter open and bit her lip at the unbridled longing she could see in Narcissa’s sapphire stare, their desire seemed to have mingled together in her mind and she now had no idea where one ended and the other began. There was something strangely erotic about having Narcissa inside her in this new way, she could only imagine that would get more intense as things progressed. "I want you to touch me."
The breathy request had goose bumps prickling across her skin, she could feel the truth behind Hermione's words. She could feel that need building deep within her that only another can satisfy. She shifted so that she was looming over Hermione, a hand next to her head supporting her weight and the other reaching down to grab her wrist and move her hand away from herself. She leant down and kissed Hermione slowly, their tongues entering each other's mouth sloppily. She had forgotten how thoroughly she and Hermione used to fuck. With a sigh of relief she slid her fingers between Hermione's folds, dipping just into the heat of her core.
Hermione's skin felt like it was on fire, every nerve ending hypersensitive as she anticipated Narcissa’s next move. She let her hand run around Narcissa’s waist and splayed it across the small of her back, she pulled her body down so that her weight fell on top of her and their hips bumped together. She moved her hand lower so that it was cupping Narcissa’s backside, palming the firm flesh and feeling it tense under her touch. Even with their new mental connection Hermione wasn't expecting it when Narcissa entered her suddenly and forcefully with two fingers. "Fuck Cissa."
Narcissa chuckled at the guttural cry that she had dragged from her throat; the sound paired with the phantom of her own fingers inside herself and how unfathomably wet Hermione was for her had her own centre dripping. And of course Hermione knew what she needed; her hand slipped from her backside, along the crease of her hip and shuffled into the space between their bodies. Hermione’s fingers rubbed tight circles over her clit and she gasped into her mouth; feeling her own arousal, having Hermione's want echoing in the back of her mind, being knuckle deep inside her and the electrifying touch against her clit was almost too much. Narcissa pushed more deeply inside Hermione and curled them into that spot she knew drove her wild and she felt it herself, she wasn't sure if it was through their connection or because Hermione's fingers were inside her now too. A desperate moan slipped past both of their lips and in a synchronised motion both of their thumbs slid to each other's clits.
Hermione felt like she had lost track of whose body was whose and which thoughts were her own and which were Narcissa's. All she knew was that the weight of Narcissa on top of her felt incredible, the press of her fingers inside her was divine and the bump of her thumb against her clit was exhilarating. Her hips started to roll to match Narcissa’s pace and she dragged her lips away from hers in favour of nipping and sucking her way down the column of her throat. She felt a third finger slip inside her, stretching her and filling her and all she could do was whimper because that was exactly what she needed and Narcissa had known. She closed her eyes and tried to root out those desires that were not her own, she sensed the strand and tugged at it and one word filled her mind...Pressure.
Narcissa felt Hermione's thumb start making quick hard circles against her clit and she began curling and pressing her fingers against that spot inside her that would push her over the edge. Her nerves started to feel raw and she knew her orgasm was building quickly. Hermione wrapped her legs around her hips which dragged their bodies even closer and they began rocking together, driving their fingers deeper. She felt completely enveloped by Hermione; nestled between her legs, her walls fluttering around her fingers and her desires melding with her own. She started to feel the ache build inside her and she knew she was close and even better she could sense that Hermione was too.
Hermione dug her heels into Narcissa’s lower back because she could feel how much she was enjoying having her riding her wantonly like she was. She rocked her hips more earnestly causing Narcissa’s fingers to slide in and out of her in the most delicious way. She concentrated on curling her fingers inside Narcissa just so and making those harsh tight circles against her clit that she always like. She screwed her eyes shut as she was dragged in to a pleasure vortex where she could feel her orgasm cresting as well as Narcissa's rushing to catch up, she could hear the wild uncontrolled noises they were both making and her skin was tingling everywhere that it was slapping together with hers. Usually she got a little more warning but without much ceremony she felt her hips jerk, her back arch from the bed and a feral cry ripped from her as her orgasm tore through her body. She clung to Narcissa whose body was shaking and quivering against hers, she felt her teeth sink into her pulse point and finally her consciousness slipped from her mind. Her heart fluttered sadly at the sudden loneliness.
Narcissa tried to calm her gasping breaths as she lay boneless on top of Hermione, her body still trembling too much to try pushing herself off her. If she was honest she also didn't want to; now that their mental connection was gone she wanted to stay close to her, she wasn't ready to stop being inside her. She turned her face to kiss along Hermione's jaw, smiling tiredly when she turned too and let their lips meet in a slow kiss. The pace, the motions and Hermione's fingers still buried in her had her rocking her hips again.
Hermione broke the kiss to look at Narcissa, her own body beginning to move again. She let her eyes dance over Narcissa’s love filled gaze, her flushed cheek and her kiss swollen lips and she knew she couldn't give her up again. Not now. Not when she knew what it was to try and get over her. "Do you think we can take back everything that we had?"
Narcissa reached up to run the fingers of her free hand through Hermione's wild hair. "Oh darling, but why would we go and do that?"
Hermione felt her heart shatter and her grip on Narcissa tighten, the pace of her hips picking up because if this was the last time she had this she was going to make it worth it. She buried her face in Narcissa’s neck, not willing to let her see her cry.
Narcissa cradled the back of Hermione's head, her mouth finding her ear as her fingers set a punishing pace inside her. "We're different now, we could have something so much better."