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Kuroo’s tenacity and leadership paired with Kenma’s intellect and wit had allowed the two of them to make it by the first few rounds together physically unscathed, emotionally? Well… at least they were one step closer to making it out of this hell.
So when they were asked to group themselves into twos, neither Kuroo nor Kenma had to look around for one. They didn’t even look at one another. It wasn’t necessary. Kuroo’s hand was intertwined with Kenma’s, their arms pressed against each other. Kuroo’s thumb rubbed up and down the back of Kenma’s hand, brushing the dirt between the younger’s pores.
-
Kuroo and Kenma followed one of the figures in red as they walked through the small neighborhood-esque maze of a room. They followed an awkward distance behind, stopping when the figure did.
As the figure turned around to face them Kenma took a quick step back, his left foot inching behind Kuroo’s on instinct.
“Players. Please take one pouch each from the staff member before you”
Kenma’s eyes followed the person’s outstretched hands, landing on two beige pouches.
Kuroo looked over at Kenma briefly, a silent interaction passing between the two, before stepping forward to grab both pouches. The worker’s shielded fist tightened around the second pouch as Kuroo tugged on it.
“One bag each.” The voice grumbled rather despondently considering they were in the better position between the three.
Kuroo’s nose scrunched up in response, his hand remaining on the pouch.
“Kuroo. Leave it, it’s fine.”
Kenma quickly exhaled, snatching the pouch himself. Kuroo stepped back begrudgingly. Kenma matched Kuroo’s steps and turned to face him.
“For all the years we’ve known each other you could at least use my first name while we’re on our death beds.”
Kenma didn’t respond.
“There should be a set of 10 marbles in each bag. Please check to confirm the number.”
“Marbles. This can’t be too hard.” Kuroo grinned, opening the pouch to peak inside.
1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10.
“Yeah. We’ll be fine, don’t worry.” Kenma looked up from the marbles to meet Kuroo’s eyes.
“Pft, you don’t have to tell me, I’m not worried Ken” Kenma’s right eye scrunched in response, his opposite brow raising.
Kuroo’s grin faltered at his friend’s expression.
”In this game, using your set of ten marbles, you will compete against your partner. The one who manages to take all ten marbles from your partner first wins.”
Kenma could feel his feet slip out from under him as his legs hobbled in the air like putty sagging under his aching hips. He reached back with his hands to catch himself against the brick wall. Dammit, how hadn’t he seen this coming Kenma’s lip trembled under his teeth as he searched for a grip in the wall behind him to hold himself up.
“Kenma. Kenma.” Kuroo chanted out gently. His voice barely audible over the adrenaline tightening inside his own lungs, between his ribs, and up around his throat.
“You will have 30 minutes for this game. Let the game begin”
When Kenma finally met Kuroo’s eyes, a reflection of shell-shocking stupor mirrored back at him. Kuroo stared at him almost absentmindedly.
“Kuroo. What will we do?” Kenma choked out, pushing himself closer to Kuroo to reach his hands.
The feeling of Kenma’s lithe fingers within his own centered Kuroo if only just a little.
“Alright, Ken. We’re gonna make it out of this. It’s just a game.” Kuroo explained, though it was more of a mutual reflection than an explanation.
“Yeah,” Kenma muttered, swallowing down the sewer of spit crashing against his gums.
Kuroo offered Kenma a small smile before giving both of Kenma’s hands a squeeze and letting go.
“There’s gotta be a way around this. There’s no reason we both can’t make it out of this.” Kuroo mused, sitting down against the concrete steps that joined the brick wall at a corner.
Kenma took a seat next to him.
“In the rules they said we have to take our partner’s marbles in order to win. What if we just exchanged marbles?” Kenma pondered aloud.
“Then I would have your ten marbles and you would have mine… You’re a genius Kenma!” Kuroo huffed out, pulling Kenma into a hug from his side. The sweat that had begun to form on his arms and neck made for a sticky hug but Kenma didn’t mind.
Kenma handed Kuroo his pouch of marbles and Kuroo in turn handed over his own.
Kuroo was sure they had cracked the code on this one. He was disappointed in himself for doubting Kenma. Of course Kenma figured it out, he always did.
Kuroo sauntered over the few steps it took to get to the worker standing watch over them with Kenma still seated on the steps.
Kenma fiddled with the pouch in his hand. There was one caveat to that interpretation of the rules but after seeing Kuroo’s face light up he couldn’t bring himself to mention it before Kuroo was up on his feet again.
“Here. It’s the 10 marbles.” Kuroo gestured to the worker, the pouch of marbles in hand. When the worker didn’t react he continued, his lips uncurling slightly.
“The rules said we just needed to take our partner’s marbles. Well, here they are.” Kuroo raced for more words to explain but the worker interrupted his thoughts.
“The one to attain all 10 of their partner’s marbles first wins. You will win when you have all of your marbles and theirs.”
The words faded into static in Kuroo’s ears. There can only be one winner.
Kenma lowered his head as Kuroo began to argue his case to the worker. This was a psychological game, not a puzzle game. And Kenma had never been very good at feelings. Kenma sighed against the nail he was chewing on.
Eventually Kuroo came back to join Kenma on the steps. His expression hadn’t fallen as much as Kenma expected. But he assumed this had something to do with how fast Kuroo’s heart was racing to hold himself together.
“Okay. Okay.” Kuroo said in assurance, more so for himself, whether he realized it or not.
“We can still get around this. There’s– There’s gotta be some way. In all the other games there were other - less obvious - ways to win. There’s gotta be something we’re missing.” Kuroo was talking faster than even he could keep up with, his lips fumbling over the words each second he persisted. “Kenma! Repeat the rules again. Let’s think. I’m sure we can come up with something. You can think of something, can’t you, Ken? You can. You always can-” Kuroo’s voice fell as he watched the expression on Kenma’s face. He looked regretful, and the pinch in his brows and frown at his lips conveyed an apology Kuroo didn’t want to accept.
“No. Ken-”
“There’s no way around it Kuroo. Only one of us can win.” Kenma was more confident about this than anything else he had said since the start of this awful game.
The two of them sat together quietly as the minutes passed.
22:23
Kenma’s head fell onto Kuroo’s shoulder and Kuroo’s arm carefully wrapped around his waist, his hand pulling gently on the jacket covering Kenma’s arm. His own jacket was wrapped around his waist because he was always warm. It was perfect because Kenma was always cold. They fit together like two sides of a coin or a cat in a cardboard box.
By now Kuroo knew what he had to do. It was the only thing he could do. But he wouldn’t part with his love just yet. Not until he had soaked dry every minute they had left.
“You know.. When we were in high school and I told you not to accept that girl’s confession?”
“Of course I do, idiot. You told me I was out of her league.” Kenma huffed. The pout forming on his face showed he had never quite gotten over that.
“I lied. You were the one out of her league. I thought– I thought no one was good enough for you. Because I’ve always–”
“Don’t say it.”
Kuroo pulled away from Kenma an inch to get a better look at him. He wasn’t entirely sure he had heard him correctly.
“Just don’t.”
“Why not?”
“It’s cruel.” Kuroo kept his mouth shut after. Kenma was right. He’d be dead in less than half an hour now anyways. It wouldn’t be right to leave Kenma after telling him that.
“I have a secret too.” Kenma whispered.
“Yea?”
“When you introduced me to volleyball back in grade school, I told you I started playing because I found it fun... I hate sports.”
Kenma didn’t continue. He didn’t need to. There were some things you didn’t need to explain. For Kuroo and Kenma, there were many.
“Hey Ken. Let’s play a game.”
Kenma lifted his head off Kuroo at the mention of a game. He had a feeling he knew where this was leding.
“We’ll go back and forth, asking eachother questions.” Kuroo wasn’t going to waste his last moments. If Kenma was going to be here with him until the end, then he figured he might as well spend the time the way he wanted, not however the game masters wanted.
“The first one who refuses to answer a question loses.” Ah, there it is.
“Alright. You first.” Kenma affirmed.
“What do you wanna do when you grow up?”
“What? Seriously Kuroo?”
“Yeah, I’m serious. For real this time, what do you wanna do? Like as a job.”
Kenma paused for a moment, “I think I wanna be a gamer.”
“Really?”
“Yeah.” His mom had always told him he couldn’t make money off of something like that. It was a stupid idea.
“I like it. It suits you.” Kuroo smiled. Wrinkles formed in the corners of Kenma’s eyes at Kuroo’s response. He didn’t need to voice his gratitude.
“Okay. My turn. When we were over at Lev’s house for team bonding and Inuoka and Yamamoto kept teasing you and Alisa. Did you, well you know did you actually–”
“WHat. Oh god no Kenma! We were never like that. Just friends. I promise.”
Kuroo scrambled to explain. Kenma thought it was a bit funny, after all, they were never dating so it’s not like Kuroo would’ve been doing anything wrong even if he was with Alisa.
“It’s okay. I’m not mad. I just- just wanted to know.” Kuroo stopped his rambling, grinning in relief. He would never admit that Kenma saying he wasn’t mad about it made him more upset than hearing he had misunderstood them this whole time.
“So, since you brought up Alisa… You and shorty?”
“No.”
“No?”
“No.”
“Okay.”
“…”
“What makes you happy?”
“Wow. I never knew you could ask cheesy questions Kenma.” Kuroo snickered.
“Oh shut up Kuroo. Just answer the question.”
“You.”
Kenma’s face twisted. A warm red crawled gently across his cheeks and over his nose.
“I’m serious Kuroo.”
“I am too.” Kuroo smiled, he wasn’t looking at Kenma anymore, although his eyes were still facing him. “When I was younger my parents were always fighting so I would just go outside to get away from all the noise. That’s when I met you. And every day after I couldn’t think of anything I looked forward too more in the day then going outside to see you.” Kenma’s mouth sat open on his face, the inner edge of his eyebrows lifting up in awe. “When we started junior high and you agreed to join the volleyball team with me.. I was so fucking happy. I was like ‘wow this means I’ll get to spend more time with Kenma every day, I’ll get to walk home with him and see him in the morning to walk to practice, and if I’m ever feeling frustrated during practice I can just look over’.”
“Sap.” Kenma muttered, he couldn’t hide the smile dancing on his lips.
14:34
Kuroo shared his smile, the comment didn’t bother him. He leaned in to press a chaste kiss to Kenma’s temple. Kenma’s breath hitched in response.
“You’re my safe space, Kenma. I think I can die happy if it’s you by my side.” Kenma’s smile fell as Kuroo prattled on.
Of course Kuroo had already worked it all out on his own without even asking Kenma what he thought. It was just like him to assume that naturally that’s how it would be. Kenma listened to his breathing to shake the expression on his face, it would be okay, he didn’t need to be gloomy.
“It’s your turn Kuroo.”
Kuroo wavered, he always knew what Kenma was thinking, but the dull edge to his voice startled Kuroo.
“Uh. Right. Okay Ken, what’s your favorite thing about me?”
Kenma narrowed his eyes.
“Ah come on Kenma pleasee.” Kuroo pleaded, pressing his hands together.
“I like the flecks of gold in your eyes.”
“...”
“I like the freckles on your shoulders. I like the dip at the bottom of your back and the bump along your nose. I like the muscles on your legs. I like the mole on the top of your foot. I like the feeling of your skin on mine. I like your bed head and your stupid duck slippers…I love how quick you are to help someone even if you have no clue who they are. I love how you make your friends feel comfortable and always pay attention to their needs. I love that when Bokuto finally decided to ask Akaashi out you stayed up with him all night to decide how he would do it and I love that you did the same when it was time for their first date. I love that when we go to parties you stay by my side the entire time because you know how anxious I get with big crowds. I love that after you figured out how much I loved apple pie you spent a week learning how to make it. I love that when the first years joined the team you went out of your way to bond with all of them and make them feel at home. I love that you see everything good in me that I never saw in myself. I love how much you love me. And I love you.”
Kuroo nearly choked by the time Kenma was finished. His face was lined with tears still rushing out. “I thought we weren’t doing the love thing?” His face contorted with the pinching of his tears.
“I changed my mind.” Kenma smiled
Kuroo leaned into Kenma, pulling him into a hug to hide his messy face. Kenma had already seen it, Kuroo knew that. But at the very least for his dwindling dignity he buried his eyes against Kenma’s shoulder. Kenma’s much daintier arms wrapped under Kuroo’s own to return the hug.
8:01
“Hey, Kuroo. I have an idea.”
Kuroo pulled back, not bothering to wipe the grime from his face.
“Huh? What is it?”
“Let’s. Let’s play rock, paper, scissors. It’s a simple game. We’ll place a bet. Whoever wins gets all the marbles.”
“No.” Kuroo refuted immediately.
“Just one round. It’s a game of chance.”
“No, Kenma. I’ll never let you have even a chance at losing.”
“Just one time?”
Kuroo sighed, pulling his hands in front of them, a fist on the palm of the other.
“Thanks.” Kenma followed suit. This wasn’t just a game of chance. Not for Kenma at least, because Kenma knew Kuroo like the ends of his hair. And he knew games.
Kuroo would throw paper.
And so Kenma through rock.
Kuroo shook his head when he saw the results. “That doesn’t count. Listen we’re not doing it this way Kenma. We both already know how this game will end.”
Kenma’s teeth pressed together, his jaw clenching in response. He swallowed, “Before.. Before this is all over, we should try one last thing. Go look for the other groups. See if any of them are willing to play us in a game. Maybe we can try to win their marbles from them instead.”
Kuroo perked up at this idea. “Ah you’re right. Okay let’s do it.”
Kuroo went to start on his way but Kenma pulled on his sleeve before he could.
“Wait.”
“Yeah?”
Kenma stepped even closer to Kuroo so he could whisper into his ear without anyone hearing. “Let me hold onto your marbles while you check, just in case.”
“Right. We shouldn’t risk it.” Kuroo nodded quickly, sneaking his pouch into Kenma’s hand. Kenma slipped the pouch up his sleeve once he felt the weight in his palm.
-
4:22
It didnt take long for Kuroo to return, most of the pairs were finished already and the ones who weren’t were too frantic and erratic to listen to any attempts at conversation.
“Well. I guess this is the end.” Kuroo let a dejected grin slip. He wasn’t afraid to die. But he was afraid of the unknown, of where it would take him, and if Kenma would be there. He had only just turned 19 a few months ago. Before this dreadful game began he thought he would have many many years left to tell Kenma he loved him and decades after that to wake up next to him in the morning.
Kenma tugged at the edge of Kuroo’s pocket. Kuroo looked back over at the smaller man. “Ready?”
“Yeah. I’m ready.” For a moment Kuroo thought he saw a distant look in his eyes. He hoped Kenma wasn’t detaching from reality, - although he wouldn’t blame him if he was - he needed to be present so that he couldn’t delude himself later.
They approached the guard together.
“We’re done. I lost.” Kuroo said to the guard. The guard made no movement.
Kuroo nudged Kenma, who he realized only now, was a few feet further from him then he thought he was just a minute ago.
2:55
Kenma took a pouch from his pocket, his fingers turned pale against the edges of the pouch. He loosened the ties on the bag and dumped all of its contents into his hand. A collection of pebbles fell tenderly into his calloused and soiled palm. Kuroo’s brows scrunched together at the view. Those weren’t marbles.
Kuroo made eye contact with Kenma for an explanation but Kenma didn’t let any clues slip from his face, he simply glanced down at Kuroo’s pocket. Kuroo reached in his pocket at the movement and sure enough he felt a tattered cloth pouch outlining a set of light pearl-sized articles. Kuroo dug the pouch out of his pocket, shaking the bag out into his hand in haste.
One marble. Two. Three. Four. Six. Eight. Ten. Twenty marbles.
2:45
Kuroo’s eyelids shot up, his eyes widening at the sight. He moved his head up to meet Kenma’s gaze.
“This is the only game I’ll ever lose to you, Tetsurou.” A soft smile accompanied Kenma’s words.
2:39
“KENMA”
By the time Kuroo’s feet unstuck from their spot and moved to reach Kenma it was too late. The gun shot slammed against his eardrums.
Kenma’s body fell limp to the ground, a hole in the middle of his forehead echoing in Kuroo’s mind. Blood pooled out from Kenma, staining his dyed hair red and seeping into the grains of his jacket.