Chapter Text
It was a fucking nest.
Where the fuck had a fucking nest come from?
Izzy hadn’t been back in his own little nook of space on the ship for so long he’d almost forgotten that there was anything back here. The crew had been bringing everything he needed to the Captains’ quarters - he supposed they were his quarters now as well - and so he’d not had need to come here.
But Stede had told him to collect his things and bring them all in.
Izzy was finally allowed to sleep naturally, without any additional bracing or support on his wings and back. He was desperate to relearn how to sleep without lying on his injured wing - not because it hurt but because it left him with the feeling of almost floating.
The strange new equilibrium he had with the Captains was helping.
Becuase they were fucking cuddling him. There was no other word for what they were doing. He’d wake up after falling asleep on the edge of the bed to find that Ed was carefully spooned up behind him, a hand around his waist and Ed’s face buried in Izzy’s dead wing, breathing through the downy scent of the feathers. And Stede would wrap his wings around the both of them - they’d not used a sheet on the bed because it got really fucking warm under the cover of Stede’s feathers, and Izzy would find himself rolled into Stede’s embrace, their foreheads touching and soft breaths moving over his face.
It wasn’t the worst way to wake up. He wasn’t fucking complaining about it.
It was really fucking weird. But it was nice.
So he had agreed to move into their cabin. To sleep there deliberately, rather than falling asleep while they pat and pawed at him to soothe him in the evenings - on a strange campaign of Stede’s to get Ed and Izzy used to the softer touches. Ed and Stede would fall into each other and kiss softly, but their hands would stay on Izzy, and he felt so deeply connected to them in that moment that it ached.
He ignored the part of him that also wanted a kiss.
Back to the nest.
It had been so long since Izzy had even considered building a nest. There was no space on a ship, for starters. And he would never trust that someone wouldn’t come in and take it apart just for the entertainment. It required too much opulence - blankets and cushions and treasures put together to make a space that was comfortable and homey for you to relax in.
This was an actual, full built nest.
And it was an eclectic mess. There were notebooks and pencils - clearly Lucius’ - stacked in one corner, a long scarf hung with semi-precious stones that he was sure he'd seen Frenchie carrying about. In fact, there were notes and items from every crew member in here - Jim’s knives, Oluwande’s jewellery, some pieces of sea-glass and a collection of rock with holes that he could only assume belonged to Buttons. It was all carefully arrayed, almost out on display for the enjoyment of anyone coming in.
But it was his room. It was a small space - barely big enough for a single person to stretch their wings - and Izzy had liked it like that. It meant that nobody came in and disturbed it.
It wasn’t his room any more. He was moving out. That was the whole reason he was down here.
He could feel tears growing in his eyes.
It hadn’t been much but it had been his . His little space to escape the crew when he was feeling the pressure of his position, when they’d all finally hacked him off so much that he could barely stand the sight of them. It wasn’t just Stede’s crew that wound him up - everyone did.
Just another thing that he’d fucking lost.
He heard a noise behind him, and he frantically rubbed at his face with one hand.
“Izzy?” It was Stede. Izzy must have been standing here and staring at the nest for longer than he thought if Stede had come to check on him.
“What.” Izzy replied shortly.
“I was just.... do you like it?”
“Do I fucking... Why the fuck do I have to like it?” Izzy felt like screaming. Why the fuck would he like the fact that they’d taken his room. That he was no longer welcome in this small space he’d carved out for himself. It wasn’t his any more, it was theirs.
“Well, it’s just that, they all worked so hard on it. We all did. Obviously most of my things are still in our room, and they’ll likely stay there, but I did provide the more comfortable items here. And Ed designed it. He didn’t think you’d like to be too crowded by things so we've just got a little bit of each crew member in here. Do you need any more? Do you want us to change it up? Oh god, Ed told me not to surprise you. I’m so sorry, I was sure you’d like it.”
“What the fuck are you talking about?” Izzy cut Stede off in the middle of his rambling.
“Well, your nest of course.”
“My.... My fucking nest?” Izzy looked at Stede incredulously, then back at the room.
His nest.
He found himself looking over it all again with a less critical eye. It was neat, not cluttered as he’d thought but organised into little spaces. The floor was covered in soft things for him to sit on, and there was a board for him to lean forward on as well as a slatted chair with no legs placed on the floor for him to lean back on without crushing his bound wings. He could see exactly where he might lie down, curl up and let himself be surrounded by the things.
And his things, the things that he’d come down to pick up, were all here. Stored carefully, still organised as he’d left them, but this time with little flourishes of colour and decoration that showed they’d seen it and cared for it.
His eyes were filled with tears again, but this time not in anger and frustration.
He didn’t really know how he was feeling about it this time. There was just too much to look at, too many things for him to focus on. Now that he knew what he was looking at, he could see the devotion that had been put into every corner of the space.
For him. The whole fucking crew got together to do this for him .
It didn’t feel real.
He stepped in through the door tentatively exploring the space. He sat down, careful of his bound wing, and curled up in the corner where the thickest pile of pillows and blankets lay. He turned his head to look up at Stede and blinked at him, letting the tears finally fall from his face.
This was heaven.
“Come here,” he said thickly, his voice feeling caught in the lump in his throat.
Stede stepped across the space in two quick strides and lowered himself to Izzy’s side. Izzy reached out and put both arms around Stede’s waist, an awkward hug for both of them but Izzy didn’t care right now. Stede shuffled the two of them around for a few moments, and finally had them so that he was leaning back against the wall, Izzy’s head in his lap and Izzy now grabbing hold of one of Stede’s legs. Izzy was sure that Stede was feeling the fat tears that rolled silently down his face soaking into the fabric of his breeches, but he couldn’t bring himself to care. Apparently Stede’s campaign to encourage him to be soft had fucking worked.
They were like this when Ed came by ten minutes later. He looked worried for a moment, a touch out of breath from walking around the ship in a rush - but he slowed to a stop and smiled when he saw the two of them.
Stede reached out a hand to beckon Ed in, and he happily joined. Rather than sitting by Stede as Izzy had expected, he slotted himself behind Izzy and spooned him as he did at night, leaning back awkwardly onto Stede’s other leg and clearly not at the most comfortable angle.
Izzy wasn’t going to stop him though. More touch - more contact - was good right now.
Fuck, he hadn’t known how much he craved it until now.
They lay there for what felt like hours.
But it probably wasn’t all that long before Ed started fidgeting uncomfortably, and Stede’s hand stopped working through Izzy’s hair and he started to speak.
“Let’s take this back to our room love, alright?”
Love.
That wasn’t an endearment that Stede had used before.
He was sure he knew all of Stede’s strange names for Edward, the little things that he called him.
And yeah, they could leave him here and get on with their day. That was fine. Just because he was a needy fucker that didn’t mean they had to be stuck here.
“Love?” Stede asked again. Ed didn’t answer, and Izzy started to turn to see what Ed was actually doing.
On the way, he caught Stede’s eye. Eyes that were staring down at him expectantly.
Oh.
Oh.
He was looking at him .
“Wha’?” Izzy said, his mouth thick with a strange taste from the silent tears.
“Let’s take you back to our room, love. We can lock the door properly, and get you sorted.”
Izzy blinked at Stede. He was still trying to process the words, but he found himself nodding along anyway. Ed started to move behind him, and Izzy subconsciously chased his warm bulk backwards as he retreated, not quite ready to lose the feeling. Ed didn’t go far, just up enough to stretch out his knee then leaned down with a hand out to each of Stede and Izzy to help them up.
Once they were all upright, Stede and Ed crowded around Izzy like they had during his recovery, as though they still had to hold him up. There was no need for that now, of course, but it was still reassuring having both of them so close.
They made their way quickly through the short stretch of corridor between Izzy’s nest and their quarters. Before Stede had fully closed and locked the door behind them, Ed was there pulling away layers of clothing from Izzy’s skin, carefully threading his wings through his jacket and then his shirt. The movements were slow, reverent, and Izzy leant into every touch against his bare skin until he was naked from the waist up.
Stede’s hands came up behind him and rested on his hips, his face buried in his shoulders and taking a deep breath into Izzy's wings. Stede pressed a careful kiss to the bare skin just above his wing. Izzy shivered at the sensation, and Stede - emboldened by the reaction - kissed up Izzy’s spine and onto the back of his neck. Izzy’s head dropped forward to give Stede access to every inch of his skin, and Stede peppered the space with butterfly kisses.
Stede’s hands on Izzy’s hips were holding him upright more than he thought, and so when Stede moved his hands to reach around him, for just a moment he swayed forward.
It didn’t matter, Ed stepped forward to catch him, a solid presence at his front.
Izzy’s hands came up to grab hold of Ed, and Ed caught him easily. Izzy couldn’t see his face, his head still tilted forward to receive kisses, but Ed just brought up one hand to cup at the side of his neck and face, leaning his head sideways to give Stede access to the pulse point just behind his ear.
Stede kissed it gently, then pulled at a tiny portion of the skin with his teeth. Izzy moaned, and Stede dropped him in a hurry, kissing the barest hint of a sting away with a few pecks.
“Are you alright Izzy? Do you want us to stop?” Stede asked against the skin of Izzy’s neck. He leaned into Stede’s chest where he could feel the rumbling vibrations of Stede’s voice. “I need to hear you, love. Is this alright?”
“Please... Please don’t....” Izzy didn’t want to have to speak, but what he managed to get out made Stede start to pull away, not quite letting him go but no longer pressed fully against his skin. A moment later, Ed started moving too, and Izzy almost started crying.
He forced out the words.
“Please don’t stop .” He practically begged, and Stede was right back in an instant, crowding Izzy forward a few steps until they both bumped into Ed’s chest.
“Alright love, it’s alright. I just needed to be sure. I can’t bear the thought of hurting you. I just needed to be sure.” Stede’s voice was a patter of reassurance and affection, and Izzy let himself relax into both of them again.
God this was too much, there was more than he could face of their hands on him, their lips on his neck and face, their bodies crowding up into him and warming him through. They both managed to fold their wings over him, interlocking together to completely cocoon Izzy in their embrace and Izzy moaned as darkness fell upon the three of them
Stede steered the three of them further into the room, Izzy only vaguely aware of the way that they bounced off various pieces of furniture as they went. Stede started to retreat his wings and Izzy whimpered at the sudden shaft of light that came into his eyes, but Ed shushed him and kissed his eyelids shut. Izzy hadn't seen where they were, but Ed was crawling backwards - wait they were on the bed now - and Izzy followed him down onto the mattress and across the expanse of soft material. It was like his nest again, a second nesting space that he could curl up in, but this time it was full of the scent and downey moulted feathers of Ed and Stede, their leftover feathers arrayed about the small square of space in repeating patterns that Izzy caressed with half-opened eyes.
Stede was still behind him, pushing him forward into Ed's embrace. He once agains sank into the sensation of being caught, of being one with the world that Ed inhabited. Ed finally tipped up Izzy's face and captured his lips in a searing kiss that left Izzy gasping for air after moments of contact. Stede's hands were now running up and down Izzy's sides, and suddenly Izzy couldn't stand the feeling of any fabric on him. He needed to feel every inch of both of the men around him, he wanted to feel the soft caress of their wings as they tickled him, the firm warmth of their hands on his skin, the wet slide of their lips on every inch of him.
Stede seemed to catch on to what Izzy's hands were trying to do first. Stede pulled at the last layer of fabric caught between Izzy’s wing and back, and threw it to the floor, the final binding now released from Izzy’s back. Ed was getting the hang of it now too, and was undoing Izzy's trousers, pulling the fabric apart and was on the verge of pushing Izzy onto his back before he caught himself, and instead lifted Izzy, seemingly effortlessly, up so that he could remove his legs. Behind him, one wing got caught on something, and Stede grunted in frustration, and Izzy heard a tear in the material and a satisfied noise before he was completely free.
Stede ran reverent hands over Izzy's wings, making a cooing sound that was unfamiliar. Izzy opened his eyes properly and found he was looking straight into Ed's face, where Ed was looking between Izzy's face and Stede over his shoulder.
"The fuck is Stede doing?" Izzy asked, a whisper in the space between him and Ed.
"You're so fucking beautiful Iz."
Izzy flushed and ducked his head. No he fucking wasn't. He was old and scarred and now he was lame as well. That wasn’t beautiful.
“Fuck me, you are gorgeous," came Stede's voice from behind him. Stede ran his fingers through the feathers, almost grooming him. Ed's grooming during his convalescence felt like fucking nothing in comparison to the sheer tenderness and love that Stede was putting into every action. He was carefully focusing on all the regions that he knew Izzy could feel clearly, each scratch trough of his fingers sending electricity through Izzy's body until he felt as though he was vibrating out of his skin. He could barely tell if he was overstimulated or fucking frustrated by the sensation, and it was barely sexual at all. He was glad that Ed had decided to just sit back and watch, because if Ed decided to touch him right now he was sure he'd go off like a rocket, barely able to contain himself.
So of course that was when Ed decided to run his hands up and down Izzy's chest, calloused palms catching on his nipples before long, thick fingers came to squeeze at the flesh of his chest. Not flying had left the muscles flabby and small, but Edward was lavishing attention upon them as though they were still the powerhouses they had been when Izzy was at full flight.
"Lay back Izzy. Let us take care of you." Stede's voice was right in his ear, his breath tickling Izzy's neck and making him want to squirm. He went exactly as directed as soon as the slightest pressure was felt on his shoulders, and Stede gently moved him down onto the soft down of the mattress and to lie on his side, prone as he had been sleeping these last few weeks.
Then Stede came up behind him and spooned him as Ed did, hooking his head over Izzy's shoulder again and kissing at his neck again, lavishing attention on already sensitive skin.
Izzy felt strangely floaty, vulnerable and exposed. But Stede and Ed's hands never left him, never let him feel untethered for even a moment. He knew, absolutely knew, that as soon as they let him go he'd fall. But they never did, spending most of the time with both of their hands on him, and their bodies pressed up into him like they were just as desperate to feel every inch of him.
They were still fully clothed, both as though they were about to have to leap up and manage the ship. Izzy couldn't bring himself to care. If the ship needed him they'd just have to deal with it, and now that he'd noticed they were both clothed he was determined to do something about it. Izzy started unbuttoning Ed's garments, the seams easy to access from where he was at head height with Edward’s belly.
Edward took one hand off Izzy's tits to help with the proceedings, and he directed Stede to do the same in a gruff voice.
Just like that, they were both shucking off their clothes, their limbs getting tangled in them as they refused to take their hands away from Izzy, unwilling to lean back even a fraction to give themselves space. Izzy felt crowded and small between them, and it was nice to just let the movement happen around him, now that he’d started them off they weren’t stopping. The frantic energy lasted until the last scrap of cloth was gone from between them. Izzy could see that Ed’s shirt was still hanging from his shoulders - him not willing to move far enough to take it off properly. Izzy couldn’t help but grin, quietly pleased with how desperate Ed seemed for him just as he was for Ed.
He’d lost track of Stede behind him for a moment, but Stede was back, and with a slick hand between his cheeks. Izzy moaned and pushed back into the pressure. Stede muttered a question into Izzy’s back that he couldn’t hear, but he was nodding and panting out “Yes, please,” between stuttering breaths. The pressure increased, and Izzy felt a single finger enter him, pushing against the tight rim of his arse. The strange daze that he found himself in let him relax and let the intrusion in. Stede was muttering encouragement into his ear, Ed’s hands now on his tits again and holding them so gently, pressing gentle kisses to the tips of his nipples and making him pant.
The dual sensations were almost too much, and Izzy found himself writhing against both feelings. He twisted and let out a sharp cry, his wing moving strangely and snapping him out of his enjoyment as the pain stabbed into him. Both captains pulled back, and Izzy closed his eyes tight and curled up, taking deep breaths.
“Oh darling, are you alright?” Stede’s voice came and a gentle hand rest on his shoulder.
“Yeah. Fine. Keep going.”
“Fuck Iz, we’re not gonna go if you’re in pain.” Edward’s voice was close, and his hands had also slid up from his tits to his shoulders, Ed’s fingers intertwining with Stede’s across his shoulder.
“I said I’m fine.”
“Israel. Please. We don’t want to.” Stede’s voice was firm, and Izzy felt like crying. His wings ruined fucking everything. Including fucking.
“I just wanted… I want to feel normal. I want you to...” Izzy didn’t know what it was that he wanted but he knew that he wouldn’t be satisfied with what they had now, not when he’d just been shown something so much more. More intimate, more loving. Just more.
“Love, this isn’t a one-time offer.” Stede said softly.
“Yeah mate,” Ed continued. “We asked you to move in for fuck’s sake, we’ll have you here as much as you want, as often as you want.”
“You’re already here. We’re not going anywhere. Just… let yourself rest. We’ll be here no matter what.” Stede’s other hand smoothed down his back and then went up to interlock with Ed’s on the other shoulder.
Izzy twisted himself so that his head was buried in Ed’s chest and his arse was right against Stede, wanting to feel the pressure of the two of them pushing against him. Fuck, his wing still fucking hurt and he was hot and not-quite-hard and needy and he just wanted it to go away, to exist once again in that floating place where nothing mattered and there was nothing but the pleasure.
Fuck if he was ever getting that again now.
Stede and Ed seemed to understand what he was asking for though, and crowded him closer again, capturing him tight between them even as Stede carefully manoeuvred around Izzy’s wings. Edward’s hand came over his shoulder and pulled at the numbed limb to lay it flatter on the expanse of bed that lay above them, and Stede raised the now free hand to rub down Izzy’s back again, this time his fingers brushing through the feathers that lay across the skin on the way down.
The three of them lay together in silence, soothing Izzy with gentle words and delicate touches for what felt like hours. Every now and again Izzy would let out a hitching sob, and every time the two men around him would curl closer, repeat their affections more firmly, and grip him wherever they could.
It was a slow dance of reassurance and love that, inch by inch, thawed through Izzy and let him relax.
He was drifting again, but this time towards sleep, soothed and comfortable again for the first time that he could remember in so long. Stede was humming under his breath, and Ed was muttering the lyrics for the tune into his ear, and they felt like a promise.
Here’s a health to the wee lad that I love so well,
His smile and his beauty there’s none can excel,
A smile on his countenance as he sits by my knee,
There is none in this wide world as happy as me.