Work Text:
When Tim kisses Jay for the first time, it is not out of affection. It is feral and angry, and Jay is too shocked to do anything but reciprocate. Tim’s hands are touching everywhere, desperate and groping, his body grinding against Jay’s, and eventually they get off without removing any of their clothes.
When they’re done Tim grabs a cigarette and tells Jay to get out of his room.
It then becomes a routine; the first night at a new hotel they will gasp and pant and shudder until they can take no more, and Tim will kick Jay out and act like nothing had happened.
Though he didn’t at first, Jay understands that these encounters are to help Tim release his pent up frustration. He understands that Tim does not particularly care about whether Jay wants to be a part of it. He understands that at most Tim regards him with apathy and only continues to travel with him because he has nowhere else to go.
Jay understands all of this, but that does not stop him from enjoying himself, from anxiously wanting to change locations more often than he used to… from becoming hopelessly attached to the man who barely acknowledges his existence.
It doesn’t stop him from hoping that one day Tim will touch him, and have something like love shining in his eyes.