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Grian was a tricky guy. Not because he always liked to play tricks (though, that would be some funny wordplay right there), but because deep down, he really was just a man.
His wings weren't functional, he lost his ability to fly. There were many reasons he came up with each time, but in the end, it doesn't excuse the fact that they're just… Defective... At least with an elytra, he can pretend to have his large wings back.
But no, he can't get one in his game. So he has to make an excuse for his flightlessness each time.
At first, he said the creeper explosion that killed Scar in 3rd Life also had unfortunately blasted his back when he tried to flee and guide the creeper away.
The creeper explosion that launched the entire desert mountain base… Grian remembered it fondly. The deal to get a monopoly of sand, of dark oak, of which they failed both of.
Oh. Where was he?
Ah, yes, his excuses.
In Last Life, he blamed his flightless wings on BDub's clever boogeyman kill.
He lost the life he took from Scar. Almost as if the world wanted him to stay at yellow so early on…
Grian shook his head. No, nobody would intervene with his game. Nobody would dare.
This time, however, it was a shared pain between Grian and Scar, and despite his excuses, none seemed to stick with his soulmate who always asked questions about the aching.
So, when someone besides Scar asked what happened to his wings, which was missing a lot of his secondaries, everything looked uneven, and some feathers were even torn, Grian took a deep breath in, and responded calmly with an already planned out answer.
"I think Scar got hit on his back or fell out of his wheelchair off a cliff. I can never tell with him. Either way, it's very unfortunate…" Grian flexed whatever was left of his feathery appendages, giving a frown.
"Oh, I thought you took a rough hit from a goat back on the mountain top."
"Maybe Scar did? Trying to get one and all that." Grian tried. "Goat horns are a rarity here, he probably wants them all to sell or something."
Grian couldn't stand more questions about his wings so he said the same thing to everyone else. "Scar took a rough hit."
It was his go-to answer now.
Everybody stops asking after the first few days though, everybody's already met up and shared what they know.
It's way past that point now though.
Once again, it was Grian and Scar versus the world. It was Scar and Grian…
It was Grian, without a Secret Soulmate alive and well that he would've cherished all the time… Gone by his own hands…
"Grian."
He could feel the tug in Scar's voice, and he couldn't help looking over at his soulmate, frowning at the concerned look on his face.
"Grian what happened…?" Scar tried once more, gesturing to his soulmate's wings.
Grian's face scrunched up and he looked back towards the night sky, continuing to build the walls to his fortified base (and hopes nobody actually pays much mind to the fact that it's just made out of wood with no actual defense).
He let out a small pained yelp when Scar leaned back in his wheelchair and whipped his head back around to stare at the elven man, who had a curious but sad look on his face in return.
Grian sighed and hopped off the pillared wall he was building, instinctively unfurling his wings, but not getting even any glide with his descent.
"It's been paining me all day, both literally and…" Scar paused, looking down with a calculated expression. "Fig… Figure…. Fig-ure-a-tive-ly…" He carefully sounded out, mentally counting the syllables as he said them out loud. "Both literally and figure-tivly speaking." He looks back up, a proud smile on his face despite leaving out some of the word.
Grian didn't have the heart to correct him, instead focusing on a way to answer Scar's question without giving much away. He fidgeted with the sleeves of his jumper, thinking carefully over his words. "Wings… Are a, uh… Big status symbol. Well, between any winged hybrid I suppose, but especially where I'm… From…" He answered slowly.
Scar just looked back at him with pure wonder, but Grian could see the dark realization in the back of Scar's eyes as he quickly pieced together where the story was going.
Grian cleared his throat. "I was… Thrown out. But not after… My ability if flight was taken from me… And, well, I spent a lot of my time trying to prove to myself that I am still worth it." He continued on, with a little more confidence than before. "That I am still worth the… Gift I was given…" He muttered sourly. "So, your normal actions, like leaning back in your chair, rubbing your arms when you're nervous, and so on, I can feel each and every movement. And, well… Having a sudden weight press against sensitive flightless wings is never pleasant."
"Oh G…"
"It was so many years ago, Scar…" Grian groaned. "At least in Hermitcraft or the 100 Day Hardcore I can pretend I'm the same thing I was before with an elytra, but here? Here, I'm reminded of what I was. And… That's why I keep coming back for some reason."
"Then why do you make excuses each time…?"
"Because this is my game Scar… And I hold a lot of power that I don't wanna abuse. I'm trying to escape that one day."
Scar looked surprised. "Are you… An Admin…?"
Grian scoffed. "No need to look in wonder. Anyone can be an Admin if they wanted to… But I suppose in a way with this game running, yes, I am an admin."
Scar knew there was so much untold, but he decided to stop pressing for answers. He got an answer for his first question, there's no need to continue with the swarm of forming questions in his head.
Okay, maybe Scar can blurt out an unrelated question. Just one– "So why were you hanging with BigB?" He suddenly asked.
Grian's feathers puffed up almost instantly at the question, the little feather tufts that dotted his face standing on its ends. He almost looked like a defensive small kitten. Well, that was Scar's first thought at least, but he's always around Jellie.
"How about I have a turn at asking a question first." Grian said.
That interested Scar. "Oh, okay…!" He said, ushering his soulmate to continue.
"Have you ever… Felt the movement of my wings…? Or just the pain in the shoulder blades when you push your back against things?"
Scar coughed awkwardly. "I uh… I've never actually felt any movement in general… There's a dull ache sometimes, but I don't really… Get anything back besides that… I don't actually… Have the shared sensations you were talking about."
"Oh…" Grian hummed. "Uh… Humm, that's… Bizarre…" He mumbled. "Everyone I talked to said they have those shared sensations. Some could feel the pain of appendages they don't have, some don't, but can still feel the pain in the general area. But… None of them ever described it as dull. Even when I kept checking in here and there to talk." Grian explained. "Even Scott and Pearl didn't have that weak of a connection like that before…"
Scar's eyes widened at the comparison between a fractured soulbound versus his and Grian's.
Though, Grian must've seen, because he quickly reiterated his words.
"I don't think this has anything to do with our soulbound." He eased. "But there has to be some reason behind it…" Grian willfully left out the fact that if it is the reason he suspects, he can't say anything until the end, assuming they'd be next to each other when they go down…
And oh, he does not have a good feeling about that…
[Grian was slain by…]
[GoodTimesWithScar died]
He tries to rid himself of that thought.
He can't help but have it linger…
He couldn't help but fall back into routine.
He can't help it… He had to watch…
No. No, this was his game, he isn't going to let them ruin this one thing for him. He was Red, but he can't lose now, not with what's on the line.
He can't tell him he can't tell him he can't–
"Grian, I'm gonna need you to step into the panda reserve for me."
What…? Grian's legs ached, and he looked over to Scar.
"Woah…" Scar murmured under his breath, too quiet for Grian to hear. "Come on, G. Let's just hang out. Chill off. Take some bamboo, feed whatever pandas remain." He grabbed Grian's hand, and guided him to the fence gate. It was a bit awkward though, as he had to keep shuffling back and forth since he can't move his wheelchair with only one hand without going in circles endlessly.
Grian didn't think it would work.
"Of course it will." Scar supplied with a smile.
Except… Grian didn't say that out loud, he knows he didn't, and now he's staring at Scar all confused.
"What…? Is there something on my face? Did I do something wrong?"
Can you… Read my thoughts…?
Scar jumped, hearing Grian but not seeing his lips move. "Uh… Maybe…?"
For how long?
"Just recently, after your meltdown."
"Meltdown…?" Grian finally actually spoke.
"Uh… After me answering your question and you giving your theory on it, you kinda just sat there and suddenly you were hyperventilating and I… Kinda panicked too and… Literally dragged you over here…"
"Well… That explains why my legs hurt I suppose…"
"It was a long process and I am a man in a wheelchair trying to pull an able-bodied man who has killed many." Scar scrunched his face up at his words. "You know what, disregard that. Go, panda reserve, now." He then said, shoving Grian closer to the fence gate.
"Okay okay." Grian said, giving a light chuckle. "Come join then."
Scar smiled. "That was the intention."